Niece Acquired

[icnclt]

After blow on your face 0:16 , maybe you could put a vignette ...

[xImStillBreathing]

i think your mustache is sexy :) ill marry you :D :D

[Nerdfighter007]

She's right about EVERYTHING. How'd that happen? (also, don't shave the beard. You could acquire many wise with that beard.)

[MsSatification]

*I'm not telling them my airdress :P* hahaha xD i had to laugh so badly :P

[jimaldon]

she's so cute!

[AdamUPN0w]

2:48 Finally a compliment.

[saverenwier]

did she fart?

[LauraLottaLagle]

This video made me fall in love with you. I don't even know what to say now...

I guess this video must have some magic in it :D I feel weird. What's wrong with me...:D

*sigh* I'm in love...

[ooohmikatglitter]

Awwwwwwwwww!!!!!!

[ballerinaboricua]

ur niece is adorable!! :)

[AlliToTheNthDegree]

@cadeau36 trollololololololol

[davidleduc85]

she is a beardlover! awesome :)

[randomjunk40]

aw, your niece is adorable :)

[cadeau36]

r they dating?

[nerdlurve]

@cadeau36 are you a nut?

[Madichamp]

You're mustache and gottee are awesome! I dont know what she's talking about! haha

[AHootAndAHalf]

this is my new favorite youtube video!!!OMG I LOVE YOU

[Metallicrose]

you can attain me with that mustache...

[backstagecenter]

she is such a cutie! she is right by the way, keep the beard it makes you more handsome,

[Tiafulable1]

definitely the best videos are the ones with your neices in them. Oh and Marcus too

[Alura]

She is wrong, you could definitely attract a wife with the moustache!

[roadsideflowers]

She is sooo cute!!!

[starlight945]

I swear you look like 'Alex Pettyfer' so much

[kemey1494]

Even though I do hate children...I still gave this video a thumbs up. :)

[jynx631]

the kid is cute and honest!

like when jake ask dont u have any remorse abt that ...she says no without any hesitation!

[MonZe66]

she's your sister?

[iloveflash16]

i like her haha shes funny

[alycat231]

happy thanksgiving jake:)

[zzzinsomniaczzz]

I aspire to be like you. I'm not sure why but I admire how happy and well tempered you are and how well you deal with children.

[LaughItsGoodForYou]

Your videos with your neices are probably my favourite.

[interestedinthings]

I died of cute when she told you your beard makes you more handsome. (it does, btw.)

[nanita2080]

I love honest kids!! She doesn't like the mustache, but the beard is a keeper... :D

[katwoolfy]

Which of those is the picture you tried to rip?

[katwoolfy]

I had to thumb down because I hate children.

[mellamoSaraaa]

did she say "GRUMPY!"? aww haha

[DRESHILL]

What job did you have before you quit? :D

[youflipmypancakes]

featured :)

[SavageEvie]

I also have a niece, who is 8 and a half. She is slightly insane also. But oh so cute :P

[XxXLadyDarkXx]

Keep the moustache and the beard!

[TheWrightSide1]

so your saying i am unsuccesful financialy

[maknostik]

Ok, that's it, I'm subscribing now. 

[DJTripleThreat78]

she has a crush on you lol

[mechanicaleuphoria]

She reminds me of my 8 year old sister. Actually theyre basically clones of each other haha.

And if it makes you feel any better, I like your facial hair, :]

[N0va19]

My earlier comment was made before the sword incident - Some kids are cool lol ^_^

[N0va19]

I'm in a bind. I don't like Kids but I like your vids :/ It's like an cosmic loop. In my head. This doesn't make sense anymore.....

[elfriedeFranz]

yes, the beard makes you look more handsome. ;) but a beard without a mustache looks stupid. i say keep both.

[gglennwill]

awww! that's a sweet vid

[jiklar]

I love how she makes you light up like that. Kids are awesome (except when they're not).

[HeyLookItsUrFace]

presh lol

[JustJaywalkable]

So cute. <3

[Netish]

So funny and adorable...gotta love kids, especially ones that are related to you! X)

[lilballerina]

The fact that you're good with kids makes me completely and irrevocably attracted to you.

[Fazerella]

I like your niece.

My niece has nothing on yours.

[OtherLivingThings]

She certainly tells it like it is. The beard comment was absolutely adorable.

[screamblead105]

I am so conflicted. I don't particularly like children, so the thumbs down is tempting. Then again, I did enjoy this video. I will refrain myself from clicking the thumbs.

[giggle240]

I like how she so straight out with your facial hair.

[brittanykaye92]

omgsh how cute!! haha

[95briannanicole]

i just understood why you have a hen between co, and ism. wow im stupid.

[SparklySnape]

Ahhhh <3

Love

[ParleySavvy]

i love everything about this.

[owlcityfish]

i wanted to thumbs down because i dislike little people but then it was so cute and funny i HAD to thumbs up!

[MissKriekentaart]

cute cute cute

[maybeintwoweeks]

perma-smile.

[MigdalaVered]

Oh goodness. Adorable. The both of you. You get brownies.

[erisaurusrex]

I find you quite attractive.

[whatalovelydayxD]

i feel like the awkwardness runs in your family.. i LOVE it. (:

[Phreeck11]

She's cute. You're cute.

[mcflygirl1977]

This makes me love my niece. They're so honest an innocent. haha

[TheBuddhaRebellion]

This made me smile. Thanks.

[Xosgni]

Does anybody remember when having ripped jeans was an embarrassment at her age?

[SilverrAnn]

Your niece is so funny XD!

[SmellingLikeSophie]

LEGEND.

[ImmaPenguinBitch]

If I stop using my iPod touch will you marry me?

[enamoredbyone]

What's with the 53 people who didn't like this video? What?! They don't like kids??  What's wrong with them??? ;-)

[hotpopcorncake]

she knows your baby sitting her.

[BrokenString92]

Wow she has a killer personality for 8!

"We don't swing that around $900 worth of equipment."

"Well you should have said that"

...I'm afraid she's right, and quick off the mark too.

[aldrichkyoshizu]

She seems smart for an 8 yo.

[erinaballoon]

shave the stache, rip some jeans, and you'll be the coolest kid on the block.

[haleyad1]

You are such a great uncle!

[smrockyriver]

several points of legitimate cackling laughter. plus one for the eight-and-a-half year old comic genius.

[weepingoldwillow]

your so cute......and the girl.

[dsibri]

Don't you wanna be just like me? lol awesome vid

[lopsideful]

50 people hate children oh wait...

[geoffrythekoala]

i like your moustache...

[musicalshockwave]

shes so cute :D your a hottie Cohenism <3 i love your mustache :DDDDD

[thinkwhatsyourlife]

:) a smile of watching adorableness that blesses my heart

[Voldey]

That mustache makes you even more manlier than you already are.

[sparedtowin]

Hahaha, wonderful.

[Xosgni]

Hooray for Uncle-ism.

[AllyGatorJaws]

hahahahaa! i love your niece.

[alycat231]

everytime u play on that our relationship dwindles a little bit more..lol

[Navs1231]

this is the cutest video ever. i couldnt stop smiling. your neice is really smart by the way. Such a good unlce :)

[annabelor]

omg that was so adorable :)

[RockyRaccoonsFriend]

awww that was cute!

[VitaminMonday]

Ahhm, I want an iPod touch... ): And some ripped jeans too.

[lidiluvu]

awww this makes me want a cool uncle like you, or an adorable nephew. adore it <3

[Strawbimi]

@lidiluvu wait, you know its a girl right? like neice rather than nephew.......yno?



[lidiluvu]

@Strawbimi yeah I know, i was switching it around since I'm a girl. But it doesn't really matter, neice/nephew/cousin/aunt/uncle­, just the idea of a family as cute as them.

[meganincolour]

She looks like you.

It makes me smile.

[favm360]

Lmfao that's so funny. I have a niece too, she's 4 but hilarious just like yours lol.

[rici6]

I'd still be your wife even if you had a vandyck. Just sayin.

[whorecard]

I love the blunt truth that is children. They tell it how it is, my lil brother is that way. "James do i look ugly in this dress?" ....... "it makes you look like a man." <3 em

[losergoescrazy]

kind of really cute. =)

[Yoursnerdly]

ah so so cute!

[mrsKaboom]

I love the part when you think that she's thinking of her bithday and than... comes a fart. and your reaction - priceless ;)

[OrgasmandTea]

This video is awesome in so many ways. I think the best bit for me was after about three minutes of sarcasm, even your icy heart seemed to melt when that adorable little niece said that your beard made you look handsome.

If you time it right, you can pause at the exact moment your eyes light up.

[mypolohalo94]

can i just say you two are beautiful together! and i loveee it when you're talking to her in your adult way :P

[i2010Tunes]

ewwwww but cute 

[i2010Tunes]

ewwwww

[whatallison]

she's adorable and you're super cute with her. :)

[artvandelay13]

I love your videos with you nieces and nephews. They remind me so much of my little cousins, except they're so much more insulting. It's very entertaining.

And at least your beard and moustache are thick and luscious compared to mine... *sigh*

[supersaupe]

She is evil. I love it. :D

'I don't think you even have a job anymore'

- I don't

[krystalfox007]

Aren't nieces fun yet still a pain, yet still fun?

[Geoponic]

You heard the fart. :'')

[nevers4yforever]

She seems very smart for her age.

And she's right your beard does make you look more handsome.

[Tiffarella]

A-freakin-dorable

[slash12190]

Your Neice is awesome.

[LetMeBeASmiley]

your facial hair's quite patchy.

how long will it take to grow a real mustache and beard?

[Cohenism]

@LetMeBeASmiley I don't understand the question.  *strokes patchy beard* You're saying this isn't real...?

I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT'S REAL ANYMORE!!

[michaelinblue]

she is pretty awesome.

[Lothomiras]

I agree with the child. You really should shave.

[Amandaudur]

you're so cute. both of you.

[georgieBOOM]

That child is quite possible the best child of the world.

[overwelmingodds]

I like how you are trying to grow a beard. Will that be your sad story in the next Nefarious Faux-Pod?

[Cohenism]

@overwelmingodds Hahaha. It may as well be.  My beard is quite a sad story.

[gleymmerei]

I love your channel .. But you look pathetic with that beard.

[Clayer001]

CUUUUUUTE.

[schnickerdo]

My brother just had a kid. I look forward to her being this age.

[chrollin481]

your mean im a child myself and i love kids/babies

[KodessR]

your vision is already failing...

thats sad :P

[hayleyheadphones]

every single video you do with kids, they all love you so much!

[ohernandez13]

Wow shes getting so big now!

[hannahmmt]

the way you look at her is so adorable.... your such a good uncle. :] but seriously shave the beard and mustache.

[greedlusthate]

You're so hot.

[Cohenism]

@greedlusthate The simple fact that you spelled "you're" correctly on the internet makes me think you're telling the truth, but the fact that you did it over the internet invalidates the compliment.

So thanks, but I take it with a skeptical grain of salt. ;)

[Spiffersaurus]

@Cohenism

It's true. Internet comments about attractiveness have about the same real-life value as Monopoly money. :)

[spazpiggy]

yay! u took my suggestion lol

i love your videos =)

[SPHChow]

Haha I bet your niece has acquired quite the vocabulary from hanging out with you :P

[havevshavenot]

2:50 Aw.....

[herochandlee]

ahahaha. i love her.

[polkakonigin]

1:40 = owned! jk, but she's cute and about the same age as my sister.

[porcupotomus]

that was danged funny. i hope you know that.

[NicklyFraggle]

@kdenae09 True and a cute one at that. After Jake pointed out that she was laughing at him a lot, I just noticed it more.

[Amberlicious1000]

So, I think you really need to be a father someday...It just needs to happen.

[geoffjayne365]

I'm glad that you talk to children as if they are a knowledgeable 21 year old. (:

[matt1308]

Kids say the darnedest things.

[DPheart]

aw that was sweet :) You'r niece is funny :D

[KCSGIRL252011]

i agree with her, the beard makes you look more handsom.

[lewisbostock]

A shameless attempt at getting girls to swoon. I'm onto you, Jake Sidwell. ;-)

[KatOfDiamonds]

So @lewisbostock said that this was a shameless attempt to get girls to swoon.

Swooning? Check. Damn.

But your niece IS adorable. {Obviously.}

[lewisbostock]

@KatOfDiamonds I said that in jest. I totally swooned too! So cute. Adorable niece acquired.

[Cohenism]

@lewisbostock I'll take that as evidence that girls are swooning.

*jots down new development in white lab coat*

Noted, sir. Noted.

[Nikkirae91]

You are such a cutie!

[candysmiles11]

wow i dont even have a ipod touch and shes so cute

[DaangMel]

heeey you look cute in this here video.

[Genkikaio]

Cute

[Cohenism]

@Genkikaio This calls for a body swap, given the fact that I want to be just like you when I get handsomer.

[thatzak]

If it's any consolation, I want to be just like you when I grow up.

[sarahbull]

haha I love it. She is priceless.

[medicaldoctor369]

Oh God! This makes me dread to see my nephew when he's older. He'll be so brutal honest...

[pokehisnose]

it's quite a good thing that none of my friends have watched this video. they all hate kids, therefore you would have a lot of thumbs downs. as for me...reverse psychology is splendid. thumbs up it is!

[adavetica]

She is so cute! :).

[birdrage]

I want my nephew to be cool like your niece when he's older and make videos with me.

That'd be nice.

[spectrem]

I love the intense look of concentration right before she rips one haha

[TheDorianGrayShow]

awww so cute xP

[thisiskayli]

Aw.

[lillyannaelizabeth]

wow with your little niece right next to you you still look like a twig

[Cohenism]

@lillyannaelizabeth Thanks. Must be that new diet of Doritos and 2% milk...wait no, I've been eating that for years.

[meachy13]

@Cohenism you're so attractive :D

[sleedolfine15]

Adorable little girl who will be a real beauty in 10 years.