@999basille No not really. Indians don't hate them as much as they hate us (Indians) Pakistan is not a part of our daily lives, we hardly discuss this country, if anything at all it is just when there is a terror attack or occasionally pity them. But they really live on hating India.
@nxvznx Yup, that would really help Pakistan's situation! They would still be backward, festering, have no infrastructure, and the Pakistani people would still have the lowest per capita income in the region, and mainly because it's a theocracy. Pakistan is more concerned with allah than with fixing all the problems in the their country, but hey, it's always easier to blame someone else, isn't it?
I love all the Pakistani jealousy and hatred of India! Basically, it's because you've got nothing else. Pakistan is a classic failed state, a shining example of what a nation based on a theocracy becomes. Instead of trying to provoke and undermine India, you should be trying to emulate them. India is surging ahead, one of the world's economic powerhouses, and Pakistan is.....a festering boil on the buttocks of history! Two words: failed state!
Peace for Humanity Conference, Muhammad (peace & blessings be upon him) the Merciful. 24 September 2011 @ Wembley Arena, London. Shaykh-ul-Islam Tahir-ul-Qadri, Shaykh Yahya Ninowy, Abdal Hakim Murad, Mesut Kurtis and mor
Does the wolrd know that Pak has also started claiming Junagadh area from India. It already shows it as part of pakistan in its maps. Kashmir is only first step.
Yeah, in 800,000,000,000 years a resolution will be made due to the shifting of plates: but what about 746,000,000,000,000,000 years from now when the shifting of the plates moves the two back together?
PAKISTAN SHOULD HAVE HAD USED THIS OPPORTUNITY TO WIPE INDIA OFF THE REGION. WITH MORE NUCLEAR WARDHEADS THAN SLUMDOG INDIA, PAK COULD HAVE ELIMINATED 1.2 BILLION BLACK SLUMDOGS WHO ARE A BURDEN ON EARTH'S FINITE RESOURCES.
@superking445 Wow if you had any idea what you are talking about you would know that india has a far greater millitary capacity than pakistan in both nuclear and non nuclear terms. If india wanted pakistan gone we could have done it in 1971 when a quarter of the pakistani army surrendered and indian troops were at the gates of lahore. Bhutto knew it thats why he came grovelling to shimla snivelling about how a harsh treaty would destroy pakistans fledgeling democracy :P.
@ag11239 gates of lahore?? hehehe... yeah right dude. After what happened to the indian army in 1965, i am sure they would not dare come near the gates of lahore... which figures why they were just standing there. lol
@aajizana In 1965 pakistan lost over half its pre war tank force plus over 1,813 square miles of territory according to neutral sources so it was very much a triumph for india :P. And in 1971 a ceasefire was signed the day after the indian army began shelling lahore which is why the siege was lifted. It was obvious that the indian army was about to take the city if the war had continued. Considering that 96,000 pak troops had surrendered already, Pakistan was in no condition to fight on
Tigersforchrist..... I have to say, Go fucking kill yourself you piece of shit, I hope you fucking die in the most painful way possible. This is satire an not real. It's people like you who start religious conflict you neo-nazi asshole, the reason that people of other religions start conflicts with christians is because you throw the first punch asshole.
@Captaincanawsowme Tigersforchrist is clearly an idiot--that's obvious. And you are an ignorant, intolerant, bigoted piece of shit. This Onion piece is indeed funny satire, but if you think for one minute that people upon whom violence is inflicted only because of their religious affiliation are instigators, not victims, let me just say on behalf of all of the Christians, Muslims, Hindus and others who live in fear or have been harmed or killed by religiously motivated violence: Fuck you!!
India is moving towards Asia through continental drift, not away. So Pakistan and India are actually coming together. I feel that this one mistake ruined the whole vid:(.
@iCHARRLZ Ey, don't be saying stuff you don't know about. I'm Pakistani and I know more about The Onion than most Americans I've talked to. They think it's real...
Chill it.
Flipping hilarious... "East Pakistan" "That effort failed when the nation became Bangladesh" lololol
@lucariofan508 TSK. YEAH man!!! *I* knew of this before annnnyyy of my American friends did. Goodness. Pakistani people LOVE comedy man. Of course... when it is not coming from ANOTHER countries' people ya know. Would you like the french making fun of Americans? Not really!!!
@SuperMrAdult Yes, I did. But he stated a comment that seems to say that he knows very little about Pakistan. Do you know that Pakistan is one of the largest English speaking nations? We understand what satire is, so why phrase that question as such?
I believe he was making a joke based off someone's ignorance that this was a satirical video. Watch any other Onion video and you'll likely find the same type of comments. He phrased it that way as irony, because the guy he was responding to was insulting other countries.
@RayKalmNiam Yup, the yanks know where Pakistan is, especially Abbottabad, unlike the Pak army!!! They also know that Pakistan is a failed state, mainly because it's a backward looking theocracy, that doesn't invest in it's own people, and squanders all the international aid on military hardware and nukes, just because of their paranoia about India! Does that about cover it?
@RayKalmNiam Wrong there mate, I'm a Brit, and I've been to both Pakistan and India. And you, are just another typical Pakistani, which is paranoid, angry, bitter, and more concerned with allah than fixing the problems in your country!
@RayKalmNiam We have our problems, as does Europe, and I criticise those also, but we're not dealing with the same problems as you, namely a lawless country, rabid and rampant religious fundamentalism, and a culture of blaming everyone else but yourselves. Indeed, no society is perfect, ours is no exception, but what a wasted opportunity by Pakistan (one of many!) by not accepting western help, and as usual whining about allah and islam all the time. It just gets in the way of any progress.
@RayKalmNiam Perhaps, but anything of medical, scientific, industrial, or technological significance, you get from us, because we had an Enlightenment and the rule of science took over from 'god' (thank god!). I certainly understand what's going on in Pakistan, and I certainly see how much opportunity has been wasted by your lot. Instead of getting involved in Afghanistan and stirring things up, Pakistan should have just taken the US money and developed infrastructure. It's quite pathetic really
@RayKalmNiam To be honest, I'd just like to apologize for that SenorSol guy's attitude. While I don't entirely disagree with his points regarding the economics, his false sense of superiority is embarrassing to all Western Powers and reflects the ignorance and foolishness that dominates a shameful percentage of our self proclaimed "intellectual" communities. I appreciate your maturity and patience while dealing with him.
@lucariofan508 Well Mr. american then do you know who your father is since yur mom could have been fucked by many niggas in the hood heheheheh DUMB FUCK!
Bin Laden living in a cave? Bahahahaha The fucking corrupt wanker Pakies have been hiding him in a MANSION! Pakistan is a fucking rogue country. Needs a good fucking clean out.
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india is much larger than pakistan in wealth, military power, population, economic stability as well as many other factors. yet they can't seem to invade or take over pakistan. cowards. pakistan is built on ISLAM. tell me india, how can you even dare to dream about attacking ISLAM? if and when the muslims around the world stand up, i dont mean them suicide bombers who make u shit urselves, i mean the real islam. thats right over a billion strong around the globe. now please be quiet. india? ha!
@Moeine93 No! We don't invade because we respect every nation. And your gained it's independence. We are never aggressive and we only respond. Hit us and we will fuck you up otherwise we are a peaceful people.
@Chaingangsoldiernit your never aggressive? can you explain the 1965 war? trying to invade Lahore and other cities in Pakistan such as Sialkot but failing. on the other hand, i can't say that Pakistan were peaceful because they did after all refuse to liberate Bangladesh.
@Moeine93 LMAO, Might I remind you that the "facts" that you believe in, do not conform with actual history. You attacked first (over Kashmir ) and then we cut your nation of Pakistan in half and created Bangladesh. Hell, there are even pictures of your General surrendering. Stop being delusional bro and maybe try seeing the world through a better lens.
@Chaingangsoldiernit 1965, 6th september. Pakistan successfully defends the city of Lahore after Indian forces try at take it over, they had lost a heavy number of soldiers and were forced to retreat. and the liberation of bangladesh is different to the war of kashmir. i never said we didn't surrender? it was wrong of Niazi to not liberate Bangladesh and he deserved the loss. nobody attacked first? look beyond that to when it was all India. we seperated. since then. kashmir is undisputed.
@Moeine93 ROFL that is made up . If we go into Pakistan as far as Lahore than there is definitely some thing wrong with your army. BTW your facts are wrong there were skirmishes on the border and Pakistan initiated that . And if we actually did invade up to Lahore then you should thank us because we gave it back to you.
@Chaingangsoldiernit if you do not believe me, research it. hell, there is even a remembrance day for it called "defence day" in pakistan. the "skirmishes" on the border was India trying to invade pakistan but failed even with triple the size and strength. what do you mean if we go into pakistan as far as lahore then there is definitly something wrong with our army? Lahore is practically right next to the border you idiot. and even now you still cant claim all of kashmir. pakistan zindabaad.
@Moeine93 Jackass, it started with Pakistan's Op Gibraltar which saw Pak forces trying to get into Kasmir. Then those forces got their asses handed to em and were sent back packing. You lost a lot of aircraft,almost half of your tanks and a shitload of personnel. But then again if you are brainwashed you will never accept defeat. Had you not surrendered you would have been squashed and suffered an even worse fate. Be glad that at least your leaders use some brain cells of their own.
@Chaingangsoldiernit what and india were perfect in all aspects and didn't lose no soldiers, tanks or aircrafts? the UN had to put things to an end in 1965 because you went crying to them about how badly you got fucked in the war. the fact is, you still can't take over Kashmir as your own. you will never take our side of kashmir either. your a bunch of cowards. so much bigger in size, full of faggots. pakistan zindabaad!
@Moeine93 Listen you stupid motherfucker. You were like a badly wounded pomeranian trying to fight a lion. You had used up 80% of your countries ammunition and if UN hadn't interfered you guys would have been smashed and trashed. Maybe all those lies that your state controlled media told you fucked your brain up. Yep, we did lose some brave souls too. The world agrees we utterly thrashed you. Now shut the fuck up and go back to reality you sick puppy. Hindustan Zindabaad!!! World cup...
@Chaingangsoldiernit wow, thats clever. your using my statement but flipping it totally to suit your side of the story? i guess it is your media doing the brainwashing. pakistan zindabaad! you will never break the pride in the heart of a pakistani nor will you ever invade pakistan and nor will you take kashmir. get a life you loser. go and drink some cow piss!
@Moeine93 Hahaha!!! Man you pakistani people are so threatened regarding your "pride"? What "pride" do you have? What right to "pride" does an idiot have? None...But if and idiot looser feels "proud" you let him and that's what we are doing. LMAO your hilarious. Live in your fantasy. Kashmir is ours. It will never be yours, forget it! And cow piss drinking?...ugh I think that's your brain washing media again lmao!!!! Just like saying every pakistani is a terrorist...wait that may be true lolz
@Chaingangsoldiernit hahaha! no. go drink cow piss hindu, your well known for it. and believe me, pakistani's understand what pride is. unlike your bollywood cocksuckers who become more an more like westeners every day with your women dancing like fuckin whores and singing songs with english lyrics (which sound horrible) what pride can india have afterall? you were being fucked by the british when they ruled over you. hahah you were slaves to them. what the hell is that river you wash in, FILTH!
@Moeine93 You stupid muhammed loving,cock cutting, half witted, son of a circumcised vaginal elf wearing a green leotard sitting on your fucking computer. Shut the fuck up and piss off. Our culture was very open in the past and we respected our women and gave them freedom. Then because of muslim invasions and rapes of our Hindu women we had to tell them to stop and bring them into the house. And you were also fuckedby the British and just as much slaves as us fucker. Pakistani = skid mark.
@Chaingangsoldiernit haha! this insulting game is kinda fun. call it a day now, i can't be bothered. life's too hard already to start a racial hatred. we can carry this on forever. i was just kidding dude, dont take it offensively.
@ethan999oz Actually, you can blame Jinnah for that. He was clearly a fool, and seeing what India has made of itself and how it continues to grow and progress, I bet there are many in Pakistan who are now thinking that Partition wasn't such a great idea after all!! All of that trouble just so you can say "Look, we're a muslim nation". What a nonsense. History has judged Jinnah badly, and proved the Pakistan 'experiment' a failure. Pakistan = failed state!
@Moeine93 But that's all you've got, Islam. India is an emerging economic superpower and Pakistan is a classic failed state, precisely because it's a theocracy, and cares more about islam than fixing the many problems in Pakistan. So much of your output and effort is wasted because of your paranoia and jealousy of India. Instead of trying to undermine and provoke them, you should be trying to emulate them, but your mulluhs keep you angry, ignorant, and backwards!
@Moeine93 And frankly your point about muslims 'standing up' is nonsensical. There might be over 1 billion of you but you can't agree on who is, or isn't, a 'real' muslim. As usual, you're too busy squabbling amongst yourselves (not to mention killing each other!) to make any progress or forward motion, and instead rely on the west for most of the technology, science, and medicine that comes your way. You have all the allah you want, I'll take a secular society based on science thanks!
I love you, Onion, but India is running into Asia, not drifting away. Get your facts straight! (Yes, this is meant to be ironic, before I get flamed.)
ABE BEHAN KE LODE TUMHIEN SAMJH MIEN NAHIN AATA KITNA BAAR AAPNI MAA CHUDWAOGE TUM LOG PILLE HO HINDUSTAN KE CHAHE AAPNI KAHIN GAAND MAAR WA LO KYON BEHAN KE LODON DAAAR GAYE
I am a Pakistani.I wish both countries to sink their differences and follow the precedent of Germany and France.Before ww2 both the european countries were considered worst enemies.but eventually they understood that only negogiations could solve the issues.after ww2 they built good ties and now they ve strong economy,military,infrastructure,service sector,open borders,flourishing trade.As compared with them,IndoPak ve much less tension.undue criticism,abusing and volatile behaviors r harmful.
INDIA WILL OWN PAKISTAN AND ISLAMACHOOT WILL BE WIPED OUT IN 1 DAY!!(oops i meant islamabad....lol...lol...lol...pakistan gahndoo toombaht achayhoe!!terri gAHNMAY too mahree oonglee,gahndoos!!!...lol...lol...lol...lol
@keeramtookoran you son of a bitch all the american and russian including israelies fuck ur mother and at the end of the day u came out of ur mom pussy...listen we will repeat the history of Ahmad Shah abdali and Mehmood Ghaznavi if u keep on like marhataz but there is one problem in indian pimps that they are being fucked by the Pakistanies so many times but they are still barking that they can do some thing..
@keeramtookoranINSHALLAH one day there will be no Pussindia and again there will be a greater Pakistan with muslims conpuerers as it was in the past. Because it is a fact that history repeats itself.
pakistan is nothing but stolen Indian land and stolen very other thing. The goats and cattle of present day Bakkkstan are descendants of the herds that the once belonged to the indians. Give us back our goat and cow, you thief
@spingsspongs of course but your are forgetting that no one outside of there realizes that they are two seperate places.Americans figure pakistan is in India or at worst india is in pakistan truly a Shocking exposee .
American's know pretty well, that's why American aid money reaches Pakistan and India gets next to nothing. American weapons sales to Pakistan are to counter-match India's arsenal. You can go to the US embassy and try apply for a visa to the States and then you can see that they know the difference.
@spingsspongs I don't think you understand the "American" way, unless you can help or hurt us we don't give a flying fuck who you are, what temple you go to, whats happening to you, or hows it going with your neighbors. If we can sell something to you, we will. If you have something we can buy, we'll buy. That about sums it up.
@millenniumrelations you don't give Americans enough credit, don't be a sheep, all that "Americans are stoooopiddddd" shit is bull. Most Americans have enough education to know 6th grade Geography.
@allwittynamestaken joke numbnuts.your the type who watchs the onion and has a serious opinion ok heres mine, eat a dick and kill yourself. that is all.
"3560 hours later and the tension is still rising Andrea, I have been here now for 10 years, my wife and kids have left me and I'm borderline insane but it appears that tensions, are, still, rising. Back to you Andrea"
"Thank you Dan. Later in the news, Brad and Angelina adopt their 57th baby..."
because! i live very close to India-Pakistan border! there is nothing like that what you shows!its all this shit channels propaganda? or just half minded comedy.....
this bitch isnt even funny...what did you fucking expect staying alongside with a mosy country... now its our fault.. americans are the ones... who is licking pakistan's arse... they attcked our parliment.. is it not america's stand democracy should prevail across the world.... we controlled it.. india unlike US did not ever attack a country.. but now you dont even want us to protect ourselves
@Ghettobusters2 Its not funny man.... I am sure the paki bastards will start a war.... They have done it 3 times.. india being a much more powerful country not even once... If india was not there they would have fought with someone else.. these bastards bombed WTC as well... they bombed london as well... I fucking fail to understand what do these assholes want ?
@theindivish Your arguments would be much better if you did not use terms like "mosy country". It maybe your stand that American democracy prevail across the world...but you forget a minor detail, what if the rest of the world does not want it? Are you then going to shove it down their throats? Second point, a terrorist group attacked the WTC...okay its upsetting but come on now, how many people have the US, and any other country, killed over in the middle east?
man pakistanese and indian hate each other, its kinda like french and british
999basille 1 month ago
@999basille No not really. Indians don't hate them as much as they hate us (Indians) Pakistan is not a part of our daily lives, we hardly discuss this country, if anything at all it is just when there is a terror attack or occasionally pity them. But they really live on hating India.
Kalikashakti1983 1 month ago
Agreed with the shifting...
watanabe757 1 month ago
mostly by growing old and dieing lol
m1c000l 1 month ago
@nxvznx Yup, that would really help Pakistan's situation! They would still be backward, festering, have no infrastructure, and the Pakistani people would still have the lowest per capita income in the region, and mainly because it's a theocracy. Pakistan is more concerned with allah than with fixing all the problems in the their country, but hey, it's always easier to blame someone else, isn't it?
SenorSol 2 months ago
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I love all the Pakistani jealousy and hatred of India! Basically, it's because you've got nothing else. Pakistan is a classic failed state, a shining example of what a nation based on a theocracy becomes. Instead of trying to provoke and undermine India, you should be trying to emulate them. India is surging ahead, one of the world's economic powerhouses, and Pakistan is.....a festering boil on the buttocks of history! Two words: failed state!
SenorSol 2 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
india sucks, pakistan rules...
TheYouwontgetit 3 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
Peace for Humanity Conference, Muhammad (peace & blessings be upon him) the Merciful. 24 September 2011 @ Wembley Arena, London. Shaykh-ul-Islam Tahir-ul-Qadri, Shaykh Yahya Ninowy, Abdal Hakim Murad, Mesut Kurtis and mor
peaceforhumanity dot co dot uk)
PeaceAndLuv4U 4 months ago
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Does the wolrd know that Pak has also started claiming Junagadh area from India. It already shows it as part of pakistan in its maps. Kashmir is only first step.
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330MillionGods 4 months ago
Anybody notice the guy walking through the screens in the background? Thumbs Down plz!
CJEJTHEDJ 4 months ago
Yeah, in 800,000,000,000 years a resolution will be made due to the shifting of plates: but what about 746,000,000,000,000,000 years from now when the shifting of the plates moves the two back together?
KeaShell 5 months ago
@KeaShell Then we need to put all options back on the table xD nice comment
Tw1St3DSt33L 5 months ago
Ha Ha
commonwhitecollege 5 months ago
India moves towards the Eurasian plate, not away from it...
GSergejj 5 months ago
I always thought Pakistan was to the right of India not the left... oh well.
FreutLupe 6 months ago
@FreutLupe
No surprise there, ur American.
vibkeba 6 months ago
PAKISTAN SHOULD HAVE HAD USED THIS OPPORTUNITY TO WIPE INDIA OFF THE REGION. WITH MORE NUCLEAR WARDHEADS THAN SLUMDOG INDIA, PAK COULD HAVE ELIMINATED 1.2 BILLION BLACK SLUMDOGS WHO ARE A BURDEN ON EARTH'S FINITE RESOURCES.
superking445 6 months ago
@superking445 were peaceful and nice
mrfrunty 6 months ago
@superking445 Wow if you had any idea what you are talking about you would know that india has a far greater millitary capacity than pakistan in both nuclear and non nuclear terms. If india wanted pakistan gone we could have done it in 1971 when a quarter of the pakistani army surrendered and indian troops were at the gates of lahore. Bhutto knew it thats why he came grovelling to shimla snivelling about how a harsh treaty would destroy pakistans fledgeling democracy :P.
ag11239 6 months ago
@ag11239 gates of lahore?? hehehe... yeah right dude. After what happened to the indian army in 1965, i am sure they would not dare come near the gates of lahore... which figures why they were just standing there. lol
aajizana 5 months ago
@aajizana In 1965 pakistan lost over half its pre war tank force plus over 1,813 square miles of territory according to neutral sources so it was very much a triumph for india :P. And in 1971 a ceasefire was signed the day after the indian army began shelling lahore which is why the siege was lifted. It was obvious that the indian army was about to take the city if the war had continued. Considering that 96,000 pak troops had surrendered already, Pakistan was in no condition to fight on
ag11239 5 months ago
The funny thing is, this really is basically what's happening and how the conflict is working out.
sekretguy777 6 months ago
"Mostly by growing old and dying Andrea" hahahaha.Epic stuff from The Onion as usual.
RedFaris 6 months ago 2
so how many more years we need to wait from now as of 2011?
DudeGamer8 6 months ago
The onion is fake.. But frekin hilarious
joshh094 7 months ago
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jmarkstu 7 months ago
Tigersforchrist..... I have to say, Go fucking kill yourself you piece of shit, I hope you fucking die in the most painful way possible. This is satire an not real. It's people like you who start religious conflict you neo-nazi asshole, the reason that people of other religions start conflicts with christians is because you throw the first punch asshole.
Captaincanawsowme 7 months ago
@Captaincanawsowme Tigersforchrist is clearly an idiot--that's obvious. And you are an ignorant, intolerant, bigoted piece of shit. This Onion piece is indeed funny satire, but if you think for one minute that people upon whom violence is inflicted only because of their religious affiliation are instigators, not victims, let me just say on behalf of all of the Christians, Muslims, Hindus and others who live in fear or have been harmed or killed by religiously motivated violence: Fuck you!!
GradStud28 6 months ago
India is moving towards Asia through continental drift, not away. So Pakistan and India are actually coming together. I feel that this one mistake ruined the whole vid:(.
denhaggard 7 months ago 2
this is very true! settlement in picture after 800 billion years...i'll be there mate god bless
kharwal 8 months ago
Haha, I'm Pakistani and this made me laugh! Bravo America, bravo!
RayKalmNiam 8 months ago 4
wtf? i m from pakistan and they r telling it like its the end of the world. stupid american media.
ayubk001 8 months ago
@ayubk001
Do people in Pakistan know what satire is?
lucariofan508 8 months ago 29
@lucariofan508 stfu!
ayubk001 7 months ago
@lucariofan508
Comedy is against the law there.
iCHARRLZ 7 months ago
@iCHARRLZ Ey, don't be saying stuff you don't know about. I'm Pakistani and I know more about The Onion than most Americans I've talked to. They think it's real...
Chill it.
Flipping hilarious... "East Pakistan" "That effort failed when the nation became Bangladesh" lololol
pink2bluee 7 months ago
@pink2bluee
What evs, I'll just cope by growing old and dying.
iCHARRLZ 7 months ago
@iCHARRLZ Aren't we all
pink2bluee 6 months ago
@lucariofan508 Actually yes, yes they do.
Mirsub1 6 months ago
@lucariofan508 Of course Pakistanis understand what satire is, c'mon, they've been putting up with US bull shit for 60 years now.
aajizana 6 months ago
@aajizana
Then you should probably look at the guy he responded to. He's making you guys look like jerks.
SuperMrAdult 6 months ago
@SuperMrAdult No surprise dude, every society has a share of its ignorant little pricks, so does Pakistan.
aajizana 6 months ago
@lucariofan508 Yep, and they have many more satire channels than in lundia... =)
hassananissheraz 6 months ago
@lucariofan508 TSK. YEAH man!!! *I* knew of this before annnnyyy of my American friends did. Goodness. Pakistani people LOVE comedy man. Of course... when it is not coming from ANOTHER countries' people ya know. Would you like the french making fun of Americans? Not really!!!
I love the onion news, btw.
pink2bluee 4 months ago
@pink2bluee Not really I dont mind other countries making fun of us and I'm Canadian so it happens ALOT lol
Mankindfails 3 months ago in playlist Season 1
@Mankindfails OH...so I've heard. lol.
pink2bluee 3 months ago
@lucariofan508 No
impuredeath2 3 months ago
@lucariofan508 yea we do relax....
eacans 3 months ago
@lucariofan508 Yes we do, do people in America know where Pakistan is on the map? Do they know anything about other cultures?
RayKalmNiam 3 months ago
@RayKalmNiam
Apparently you don't have a sense of humor. Did you even read the comment he responded to?
SuperMrAdult 3 months ago
@SuperMrAdult Yes, I did. But he stated a comment that seems to say that he knows very little about Pakistan. Do you know that Pakistan is one of the largest English speaking nations? We understand what satire is, so why phrase that question as such?
RayKalmNiam 3 months ago
@RayKalmNiam
I believe he was making a joke based off someone's ignorance that this was a satirical video. Watch any other Onion video and you'll likely find the same type of comments. He phrased it that way as irony, because the guy he was responding to was insulting other countries.
SuperMrAdult 3 months ago
@SuperMrAdult I know the 'ironical' question he phrased. But the way he phrased it shows me how little he knows about other nations.
RayKalmNiam 3 months ago
@RayKalmNiam Yup, the yanks know where Pakistan is, especially Abbottabad, unlike the Pak army!!! They also know that Pakistan is a failed state, mainly because it's a backward looking theocracy, that doesn't invest in it's own people, and squanders all the international aid on military hardware and nukes, just because of their paranoia about India! Does that about cover it?
SenorSol 2 months ago
@SenorSol You're another one of those typical Americans.
RayKalmNiam 2 months ago
@RayKalmNiam Wrong there mate, I'm a Brit, and I've been to both Pakistan and India. And you, are just another typical Pakistani, which is paranoid, angry, bitter, and more concerned with allah than fixing the problems in your country!
SenorSol 2 months ago
@SenorSol Well, aren't there many more problems in your country?
RayKalmNiam 2 months ago
@RayKalmNiam We have our problems, as does Europe, and I criticise those also, but we're not dealing with the same problems as you, namely a lawless country, rabid and rampant religious fundamentalism, and a culture of blaming everyone else but yourselves. Indeed, no society is perfect, ours is no exception, but what a wasted opportunity by Pakistan (one of many!) by not accepting western help, and as usual whining about allah and islam all the time. It just gets in the way of any progress.
SenorSol 2 months ago
@SenorSol Oh boy, a typical western inbred attitude. Your kind never understands. May God help you.
RayKalmNiam 2 months ago
@RayKalmNiam Perhaps, but anything of medical, scientific, industrial, or technological significance, you get from us, because we had an Enlightenment and the rule of science took over from 'god' (thank god!). I certainly understand what's going on in Pakistan, and I certainly see how much opportunity has been wasted by your lot. Instead of getting involved in Afghanistan and stirring things up, Pakistan should have just taken the US money and developed infrastructure. It's quite pathetic really
SenorSol 2 months ago
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@SenorSol My point proven.
RayKalmNiam 2 months ago
@RayKalmNiam To be honest, I'd just like to apologize for that SenorSol guy's attitude. While I don't entirely disagree with his points regarding the economics, his false sense of superiority is embarrassing to all Western Powers and reflects the ignorance and foolishness that dominates a shameful percentage of our self proclaimed "intellectual" communities. I appreciate your maturity and patience while dealing with him.
Cheeriko 1 month ago in playlist Season 1
@Cheeriko Thank you for understand like the average person would :)
RayKalmNiam 1 month ago
@lucariofan508 Well Mr. american then do you know who your father is since yur mom could have been fucked by many niggas in the hood heheheheh DUMB FUCK!
Dholbajale 2 months ago
@ayubk001 Stupid Americans? Oh my, the irony!!!!....This is fake, ya'know.
megamantwelve 7 months ago
It's great to know that conflict will end in as little as 800,000,000,000 years.
SirSebastianWang 8 months ago 23
hopefully etchisketchistan will help defuse this standoff :)
rawdenashitey 8 months ago 3
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Facts about Real india:
350-400 million people below poverty line.
30% indian still lives on dollar a day.
47% of indina kids under 5 are malnourished.
Half of worlds chronically hungry live there.
An estimated million prostitutes in india.
World health officials calling india the next africa because of its spreading hiv/aids.
Bombay generates $400 million a year in revenue just from its prostitute business.
India has more hiv ppl then any other country in the world. So Fuck u
thunderpaki1 8 months ago
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Bin Laden living in a cave? Bahahahaha The fucking corrupt wanker Pakies have been hiding him in a MANSION! Pakistan is a fucking rogue country. Needs a good fucking clean out.
TheCusterCat 9 months ago
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tigersforchrist 9 months ago
lmao general "loozwar"
antikackz 9 months ago
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wwwtotalitaerde 9 months ago
she's hot!
666789443 9 months ago
@666789443 dogg you have bad taste she looks like Lurch from Adam's Family.
SonnyA89 8 months ago
Thats the best solution lol
sahirdonsocomeon 9 months ago
"Report: Cost-Benefit Analysis Rules Out Saving the Earth from Asteroid." lool.
jahlinem 9 months ago
"Happening Now: Suicidal man on roof in downtown Chicago plans to aim for parked Mercedes." lol
28drew28 9 months ago
Jesus fucking Christ can you to motherfuckers shut up and stop being cocksuckers
m1c000l 9 months ago
It's funny b/c Th Onion is also making fun of the stupid comment wars on this vid : ]
FudgeDaWhat 9 months ago 3
Good cussing grief you two... ever heard of calling the whole thing off? Give it a try. Or get a chat room already. They DO still exist you know.
WakeCreateSleep 9 months ago
India. Beastly. Gandi bitches
FranklinFalcons999 9 months ago
india is much larger than pakistan in wealth, military power, population, economic stability as well as many other factors. yet they can't seem to invade or take over pakistan. cowards. pakistan is built on ISLAM. tell me india, how can you even dare to dream about attacking ISLAM? if and when the muslims around the world stand up, i dont mean them suicide bombers who make u shit urselves, i mean the real islam. thats right over a billion strong around the globe. now please be quiet. india? ha!
Moeine93 10 months ago
@Moeine93 No! We don't invade because we respect every nation. And your gained it's independence. We are never aggressive and we only respond. Hit us and we will fuck you up otherwise we are a peaceful people.
Chaingangsoldiernit 9 months ago
@Chaingangsoldiernit your never aggressive? can you explain the 1965 war? trying to invade Lahore and other cities in Pakistan such as Sialkot but failing. on the other hand, i can't say that Pakistan were peaceful because they did after all refuse to liberate Bangladesh.
Moeine93 9 months ago
@Moeine93 LMAO, Might I remind you that the "facts" that you believe in, do not conform with actual history. You attacked first (over Kashmir ) and then we cut your nation of Pakistan in half and created Bangladesh. Hell, there are even pictures of your General surrendering. Stop being delusional bro and maybe try seeing the world through a better lens.
Chaingangsoldiernit 9 months ago
@Chaingangsoldiernit 1965, 6th september. Pakistan successfully defends the city of Lahore after Indian forces try at take it over, they had lost a heavy number of soldiers and were forced to retreat. and the liberation of bangladesh is different to the war of kashmir. i never said we didn't surrender? it was wrong of Niazi to not liberate Bangladesh and he deserved the loss. nobody attacked first? look beyond that to when it was all India. we seperated. since then. kashmir is undisputed.
Moeine93 9 months ago
@Moeine93 ROFL that is made up . If we go into Pakistan as far as Lahore than there is definitely some thing wrong with your army. BTW your facts are wrong there were skirmishes on the border and Pakistan initiated that . And if we actually did invade up to Lahore then you should thank us because we gave it back to you.
Chaingangsoldiernit 9 months ago
@Chaingangsoldiernit if you do not believe me, research it. hell, there is even a remembrance day for it called "defence day" in pakistan. the "skirmishes" on the border was India trying to invade pakistan but failed even with triple the size and strength. what do you mean if we go into pakistan as far as lahore then there is definitly something wrong with our army? Lahore is practically right next to the border you idiot. and even now you still cant claim all of kashmir. pakistan zindabaad.
Moeine93 9 months ago
@Moeine93 Jackass, it started with Pakistan's Op Gibraltar which saw Pak forces trying to get into Kasmir. Then those forces got their asses handed to em and were sent back packing. You lost a lot of aircraft,almost half of your tanks and a shitload of personnel. But then again if you are brainwashed you will never accept defeat. Had you not surrendered you would have been squashed and suffered an even worse fate. Be glad that at least your leaders use some brain cells of their own.
Chaingangsoldiernit 9 months ago
@Chaingangsoldiernit what and india were perfect in all aspects and didn't lose no soldiers, tanks or aircrafts? the UN had to put things to an end in 1965 because you went crying to them about how badly you got fucked in the war. the fact is, you still can't take over Kashmir as your own. you will never take our side of kashmir either. your a bunch of cowards. so much bigger in size, full of faggots. pakistan zindabaad!
Moeine93 9 months ago
@Moeine93 Listen you stupid motherfucker. You were like a badly wounded pomeranian trying to fight a lion. You had used up 80% of your countries ammunition and if UN hadn't interfered you guys would have been smashed and trashed. Maybe all those lies that your state controlled media told you fucked your brain up. Yep, we did lose some brave souls too. The world agrees we utterly thrashed you. Now shut the fuck up and go back to reality you sick puppy. Hindustan Zindabaad!!! World cup...
Chaingangsoldiernit 9 months ago
@Chaingangsoldiernit wow, thats clever. your using my statement but flipping it totally to suit your side of the story? i guess it is your media doing the brainwashing. pakistan zindabaad! you will never break the pride in the heart of a pakistani nor will you ever invade pakistan and nor will you take kashmir. get a life you loser. go and drink some cow piss!
Moeine93 9 months ago
@Moeine93 Hahaha!!! Man you pakistani people are so threatened regarding your "pride"? What "pride" do you have? What right to "pride" does an idiot have? None...But if and idiot looser feels "proud" you let him and that's what we are doing. LMAO your hilarious. Live in your fantasy. Kashmir is ours. It will never be yours, forget it! And cow piss drinking?...ugh I think that's your brain washing media again lmao!!!! Just like saying every pakistani is a terrorist...wait that may be true lolz
Chaingangsoldiernit 9 months ago
@Chaingangsoldiernit hahaha! no. go drink cow piss hindu, your well known for it. and believe me, pakistani's understand what pride is. unlike your bollywood cocksuckers who become more an more like westeners every day with your women dancing like fuckin whores and singing songs with english lyrics (which sound horrible) what pride can india have afterall? you were being fucked by the british when they ruled over you. hahah you were slaves to them. what the hell is that river you wash in, FILTH!
Moeine93 9 months ago
@Moeine93 You stupid muhammed loving,cock cutting, half witted, son of a circumcised vaginal elf wearing a green leotard sitting on your fucking computer. Shut the fuck up and piss off. Our culture was very open in the past and we respected our women and gave them freedom. Then because of muslim invasions and rapes of our Hindu women we had to tell them to stop and bring them into the house. And you were also fuckedby the British and just as much slaves as us fucker. Pakistani = skid mark.
Chaingangsoldiernit 9 months ago
@Chaingangsoldiernit haha! this insulting game is kinda fun. call it a day now, i can't be bothered. life's too hard already to start a racial hatred. we can carry this on forever. i was just kidding dude, dont take it offensively.
Moeine93 9 months ago
@Moeine93 Ditto.
Chaingangsoldiernit 9 months ago
@Moeine93 Dude, Pakistan was a part of India when the British ruled over us. They divided India into India and Pakistan in 1947.
ethan999oz 8 months ago
@ethan999oz Actually, you can blame Jinnah for that. He was clearly a fool, and seeing what India has made of itself and how it continues to grow and progress, I bet there are many in Pakistan who are now thinking that Partition wasn't such a great idea after all!! All of that trouble just so you can say "Look, we're a muslim nation". What a nonsense. History has judged Jinnah badly, and proved the Pakistan 'experiment' a failure. Pakistan = failed state!
SenorSol 2 months ago
@Moeine93 But that's all you've got, Islam. India is an emerging economic superpower and Pakistan is a classic failed state, precisely because it's a theocracy, and cares more about islam than fixing the many problems in Pakistan. So much of your output and effort is wasted because of your paranoia and jealousy of India. Instead of trying to undermine and provoke them, you should be trying to emulate them, but your mulluhs keep you angry, ignorant, and backwards!
SenorSol 2 months ago
@Moeine93 And frankly your point about muslims 'standing up' is nonsensical. There might be over 1 billion of you but you can't agree on who is, or isn't, a 'real' muslim. As usual, you're too busy squabbling amongst yourselves (not to mention killing each other!) to make any progress or forward motion, and instead rely on the west for most of the technology, science, and medicine that comes your way. You have all the allah you want, I'll take a secular society based on science thanks!
SenorSol 2 months ago
I love you, Onion, but India is running into Asia, not drifting away. Get your facts straight! (Yes, this is meant to be ironic, before I get flamed.)
sobekcroc 10 months ago
ABE BEHAN KE LODE TUMHIEN SAMJH MIEN NAHIN AATA KITNA BAAR AAPNI MAA CHUDWAOGE TUM LOG PILLE HO HINDUSTAN KE CHAHE AAPNI KAHIN GAAND MAAR WA LO KYON BEHAN KE LODON DAAAR GAYE
jaathurricane 10 months ago
LOLL. Amazingness.
rizwantakkhar 10 months ago
I am a Pakistani.I wish both countries to sink their differences and follow the precedent of Germany and France.Before ww2 both the european countries were considered worst enemies.but eventually they understood that only negogiations could solve the issues.after ww2 they built good ties and now they ve strong economy,military,infrastructure,service sector,open borders,flourishing trade.As compared with them,IndoPak ve much less tension.undue criticism,abusing and volatile behaviors r harmful.
warrior635635 10 months ago
to pakistans military i say...ben chott!!MODAR CHOTT!!MODAR CHENDAY!!
keeramtookoran 10 months ago
INDIA WILL OWN PAKISTAN AND ISLAMACHOOT WILL BE WIPED OUT IN 1 DAY!!(oops i meant islamabad....lol...lol...lol...pakistan gahndoo toombaht achayhoe!!terri gAHNMAY too mahree oonglee,gahndoos!!!...lol...lol...lol...lol
keeramtookoran 10 months ago
@keeramtookoran you son of a bitch all the american and russian including israelies fuck ur mother and at the end of the day u came out of ur mom pussy...listen we will repeat the history of Ahmad Shah abdali and Mehmood Ghaznavi if u keep on like marhataz but there is one problem in indian pimps that they are being fucked by the Pakistanies so many times but they are still barking that they can do some thing..
99abidjan 10 months ago
@keeramtookoranINSHALLAH one day there will be no Pussindia and again there will be a greater Pakistan with muslims conpuerers as it was in the past. Because it is a fact that history repeats itself.
99abidjan 10 months ago
@99abidjan good and then you peopl will be kicked out again...
Chaingangsoldiernit 10 months ago
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If you would like the honest, unbiased opinion of an Englishman - it always seems like Pakistanis are very jealous of Indians. Just my observation.
SlickRick362 10 months ago
Bullshit..!!!! west wants the tension to be there to sell there arms..
tripat22 10 months ago
Id laugh more, but this report is actully pretty accurate, seriously
powereater 10 months ago
nuclear summer
formerutuber 11 months ago 3
do they mean israel and palestine
bbkbbr 11 months ago
@bbkbbr no, that's like only the third nuclear standoff on our planet right now.
JaeEffingKae 10 months ago
whew only 800 billion years...good to know that this standoff will finally be over 795 billion years after the sun has died.
marine5546 11 months ago
is this a joke?
rahsek1 11 months ago
@rahsek1
of course not.
Puglous 11 months ago
@rahsek1 not at all, its an independent low budget news network
elmaxidelsur 11 months ago
"If a resolution is not reached within 800billion years, the border may seperate, ending this conflict without bloodshed." XD
Puglous 11 months ago 4
this lady is too monotonus
punaniswabber 11 months ago
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On 16 December 1971, General Jagjit Singh Arora of India accepted surrender
by General Niazi of Pakistan along with 93,000 Pakistani forces after 1300
casualties from the Pakistani side, Niazi signed the instrument of surrender.
This was the largest number of POWs since World War II.
Pakistan lost 140,000 sq kms of area.
Later Niazi blamed Yahya Khan and Zulfiqar Ali Bhutto for the surrender.
uindeu 11 months ago
Blocking comments, sick of smug I am seeing by onion videos comment sections, onion would be ashamed of you elitist idiots.
xXmilesdavisXx 11 months ago
we'll all be watching to see if that happens
m1c000l 11 months ago
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Check this out for discount and incentives....!!!!!!!
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shaina04gaul 11 months ago
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I wish to thank you so much in your help in this matte busizz4me.info
yamunaperara 11 months ago
Bakkkstani's generals are always so angry. They need regular sessions of Laughter Yoga and Ayurvedic oilmassage from kerala
spingsspongs 11 months ago
"mostly by growing old and dying" lmao ahahhahah
madb1205 11 months ago
Even if India moved , Pakistan would follow coz there is no Pakistan without India
rodriquz 11 months ago
@rodriquz
pakistan is nothing but stolen Indian land and stolen very other thing. The goats and cattle of present day Bakkkstan are descendants of the herds that the once belonged to the indians. Give us back our goat and cow, you thief
spingsspongs 11 months ago
@spingsspongs of course but your are forgetting that no one outside of there realizes that they are two seperate places.Americans figure pakistan is in India or at worst india is in pakistan truly a Shocking exposee .
millenniumrelations 11 months ago
@millenniumrelations
American's know pretty well, that's why American aid money reaches Pakistan and India gets next to nothing. American weapons sales to Pakistan are to counter-match India's arsenal. You can go to the US embassy and try apply for a visa to the States and then you can see that they know the difference.
spingsspongs 11 months ago
@spingsspongs I don't think you understand the "American" way, unless you can help or hurt us we don't give a flying fuck who you are, what temple you go to, whats happening to you, or hows it going with your neighbors. If we can sell something to you, we will. If you have something we can buy, we'll buy. That about sums it up.
allwittynamestaken 11 months ago
@millenniumrelations you don't give Americans enough credit, don't be a sheep, all that "Americans are stoooopiddddd" shit is bull. Most Americans have enough education to know 6th grade Geography.
allwittynamestaken 11 months ago
@allwittynamestaken joke numbnuts.your the type who watchs the onion and has a serious opinion ok heres mine, eat a dick and kill yourself. that is all.
millenniumrelations 11 months ago
hahaha im pakistani and this cracked me up XD !!
samar90 1 year ago 4
@samar90 lol your canadian?
haxproductions1 1 year ago
@haxproductions1 i live in canada
samar90 1 year ago
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@samar90 ok my bad
haxproductions1 1 year ago
India will most likely split from the continent in only two billion years. That will definatly stop any thought of bloodshed! Lol
thebagheadgroup 1 year ago
Indo-Pakistandoff would have been a bit more clever.
EnsignKing 1 year ago
who ever make this is really good video editer
dhruvilshah30 1 year ago
"3560 hours later and the tension is still rising Andrea, I have been here now for 10 years, my wife and kids have left me and I'm borderline insane but it appears that tensions, are, still, rising. Back to you Andrea"
"Thank you Dan. Later in the news, Brad and Angelina adopt their 57th baby..."
lollalot 1 year ago 28
even if the continents are moved, the india is taking kashmir with it....so it wont resolve..xoxox
rebelfromlahore 1 year ago 2
These fucken idiots...The Indians don't hate the Packinstans, they hate the cowboys and Genrel Custard.
3billion3 1 year ago
they are coping by growing old and dying...lol
lasku0007 1 year ago 40
hahahahha...omfg..this is hilarious.......best indo - pak vdeo ever...!!!!
yourroots 1 year ago
fox news should link to this
jettafloater 1 year ago
the only plausible onion news i have ever seen was the obama lipsync one
dratyats 1 year ago
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Welcome onboard Russian here gettop5.info
morgantobfr 1 year ago
because! i live very close to India-Pakistan border! there is nothing like that what you shows!its all this shit channels propaganda? or just half minded comedy.....
Jaswindersinghkhalsa 1 year ago
this might be a parody but, its mostly true except for the continental drift part ;-P
in reality indian peninsula is pushing against the northern landmass......afterall, that's the reason himalayas came into existance!!
bvindh 1 year ago
these people are crazy , i mean the onion News network lmao
MEGABOINK65 1 year ago
Andrea is bitch... hoagoskodkoko
4mahmood 1 year ago
fake video!just propaganda
Jaswindersinghkhalsa 1 year ago
@Jaswindersinghkhalsa
realy?
JimK1rk 1 year ago
@Jaswindersinghkhalsa
Mate, its called satire.
J0NDUDE 1 year ago
@Jaswindersinghkhalsa fake video!just comedy
extraheavybass 1 year ago
this bitch isnt even funny...what did you fucking expect staying alongside with a mosy country... now its our fault.. americans are the ones... who is licking pakistan's arse... they attcked our parliment.. is it not america's stand democracy should prevail across the world.... we controlled it.. india unlike US did not ever attack a country.. but now you dont even want us to protect ourselves
theindivish 1 year ago
@theindivish shut up...
P90Xful 1 year ago
@theindivish Please keep us informed over the next 800 billion years.
Ghettobusters2 1 year ago
@Ghettobusters2 Its not funny man.... I am sure the paki bastards will start a war.... They have done it 3 times.. india being a much more powerful country not even once... If india was not there they would have fought with someone else.. these bastards bombed WTC as well... they bombed london as well... I fucking fail to understand what do these assholes want ?
theindivish 1 year ago 2
@theindivish Your arguments would be much better if you did not use terms like "mosy country". It maybe your stand that American democracy prevail across the world...but you forget a minor detail, what if the rest of the world does not want it? Are you then going to shove it down their throats? Second point, a terrorist group attacked the WTC...okay its upsetting but come on now, how many people have the US, and any other country, killed over in the middle east?
Hobbodealer 1 year ago
Forgot to mention the Christian Crusades in the middle east....and we wonder why they might not like us : P
Hobbodealer 1 year ago
where do they come up with all this stuff? its just brilliant.
7Niwde7 1 year ago
the way they talk, if i had a few less IQ points, i might believe this was real
dtpheif 1 year ago 68
@dtpheif fewer IQ points, not less IQ points
cuth3mo 1 year ago
@dtpheif Well, I blame FOX news for making people even close to that stupid.
CabooseNor 1 year ago 2
@dtpheif your IQ must be low if you are only a few IQ points away from thinking it's real :D
firingmahlazar 1 year ago
Why is India and Sri Lanka the same colour?
Aqualiteking 1 year ago
@Aqualiteking and Nepal and Bhutan
asmilesa 1 year ago
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both are sand niggers.
sugar3whayes 1 year ago
My dad was there where the reporter is. He told him he hopes that the conflict is over very soon.
lesliedbruce 1 year ago
hehehehe.. great one.. we Indians do not hate the pakis, rahtr consider them as friends, but