wow...this is extremely heartfelt and raw, I like it, but I'm an advocate for speaking out and smashing stigma..however I respect your view on how to work with the disorder how it presents itself to you. I really enjoyed this video because of its rawness...that honesty that makes the viewer go.."yes I'm like this" Good work, Every Blessing..ps you may not want to hear this..but there is always hope..even if most days hope is as distant as joy, it doesn't mean it doest exist or isn't accessible.
Just wanted to say thanks to everyone who has liked and commented on this video. I was hospitalized a few weeks after I made this video, I was in a very dark place. I make some new vlogs now trying to deal and manage with Bipolar without medication. But I still think taking medication is definitely important of course. I was in a very very dark place when I made this, I am glad it has resonated well with you all. We are not alone, we can survive this Disorder and make our lives whole again.
I related to nearly everything you said in that video. I wouldn't be able to live without meds either. I can tell you write a lot, I'm a prolific writer, mainly of poetry.
bipolar is an overproduction of serotonin in the brain which turns into adrenaline so being adrenalised constantly explains mania and what goes up must come down thus depression without medication bipolar people can stay awake for 2-3 days then collapse into sleep people need to simply take sedatives to get rest when they are awake for extended periods or scattered and energised excessafly and become grounded and focused rational mentally and have a good heart and wisdom and they will be fine
What goes on in the avg persons mind if they are not always thinking about something? How is it possible to think of nothing? Ok maybe nothing of signifigance I can see, but nothing? I can't even imagine what mundane shit life is for normal people. Yes my lows really suck, but being normal looks like it sucks too, only it sucks all the time, consistently sucking, like a drone on prozac.
@Lovinight I hear what you are saying, it's crazy to think how we would be without all the knowledge we obtain from this disorder. Thank you for watching.
FYI, while in the manic high, I have been told we can score practically off the charts of an IQ test. The high is the best, can you imagine life w/o it? That is what "normal" people get to live with, next time I do meds, f'K the mood stabilizer, I'm stickin with anti-depressants and vyvvanse (ADHD) meds. Seroquel is equalivent of medicated coma for me, scary thing is after a while I begin to like never having to wake up. No more seroquel for me. Hmm how did I wind up here?
We are willing to take the road less traveled and go it alone if we must. This place has so much suffering of all species, I find the most offensive to be, the suffering of animals by the hand of man, skinning alive animals? Everything w/in me knows this is wrong, this world is so off balance, yet they say we are the ones off balance. I wouldn't change who I am for anything! I hang on for the love I have for my son and the unconditional bond of love I finally found. I can't leave him alone.
The one most consistent feeling I always come back to is simply not wanting to be! At 13 I knew in my heart I didn't belong here, I was not cut out to make it in this world, this world is so frickin cruel to some, yet their are some who seem to thrive in it somehow. Recently I have come to the conclusion we are the way we are for a reason, their must be a purpose though I don't know what it is. I am sure it is for the good of others, deserving or not.
that was beautiful, and i know know one else can feel love, hate and apathy the way we do, i applaud you for putting this out here. after 10 years of medication i am off of them and i never plan on going back on them no matter the consequences. medicated or not the lonliness will always be here. and to daniel bowden, i never would have thought the the shards of glass could actually be diamonds. but either way yhey wouldnt understand and even if they could, they'd never be able to feel it like us
The Citizens Commission on Human Rights (CCHR) is a nonprofit mental health watchdog, responsible for helping to enact more than 150 laws to protecting from abusive or coercive practices. CCHR has fought to restore basic human rights in mental health, including, full informed consent regarding the medical legitimacy of psychiatric diagnosis, the Risks of psychiatric treatments,and the Right to ReFuSe any TreatmenT. Dont lock the door abuse and humiliate and call it help ! it didnt ! f that !
Thanks for posting this oh so real and raw video of what we actually go through. I wish other people understood , so people like you are a rare gift. I know what you are going through and it fucking sucks but there has to be a reason for our suffereing . Liike you said we evolve faster and i believe there will come a time when our wisdom, and strength from our sufffering will be needed. I hope you don't hide who youa re from the world like u said you were going too because u are f***ing amazing
@MsRachdawg Wow, thank you. Yeah it's hard going through life without the poeple around us understanding what we are going through or what we have gone through. Thank you for your kind comments they are greatly appreciated. And I agree with you there has to be a reason for all the madness. I am also now done hiding from this and I want to help others and help myself to live a better life. Thank you for your words, it means a lot.
THIS IS THE REST OF MY COMMENT BELOW .......... THE JUDGE ALL OF A SUDEN I WAS DEFINATLY GUILTY AND CRAZY AND DANGEROUS JUST CAUSE HE HEARD BIPOLAR AND IM ACTUALLY A VERY KIND HEARTED PERSON I WAS A FIREFIGHTER FOR 4 YEARS I RISKED MY LIFE FOR OTHERS TO LIVE AND RUN RESCUE FOR TWO I CARED SO MUCH I WOULD CHECK UP ON SOME OF THE PEOUPLE WE CARRIED TO THE HOSPITAL TO SEE HOW THEY WERE BUT THIS IS A FUCKED UP CRUEL WORLD AND I HOPE THIS COMMENT LETS U KNOW SOMEONE DID FEEL UR WORDS IT HURTS ALWAYS.
@cameronjohnson68 Wow, damn thanks a lot man I really appreciate it. I remember I was in a very dark place when I made this video. I am very glad you heard all this and that it spoke to you. Your comment means a lot I really do appreciate it.
I FEEL SO CLOSE TO U NOT TO KNOW U AT ALL IM 29 IV BEEN SICK SINCE I WAS 6 AND SO MUCH OF WHAT U SAID MAKES ME FEEL GOOD TO KNOW IM NOT CRAZY AND SOMEONE ELSE KNOWS HOW I FEEL I NEVER WENT THROUGH THE STUFF U DID AFTER UR GRANDMOTHER DIED BUT EVERYTHING BEFORE THAT IS IF U WERE IN MY HEAD I MADE THE MISTAKE OFF BEING OPEN WITH IT NOW I GET SO MUCH SHIT FROM DOIN SO IV NEVER BEEN IN MUCH TROUBLE BUT I WAS IN A FIGHT IN COURT THEY BROUGHT UP I WAS BIPOLAR THE JUDGES WHOLE ATTITUDE CHANGED
It's really not crazy. I understand completely. I have been very similarly frustrated with endless explanations to people who can never truly understand. It does make one feel terribly alone.
I'm nearly 36 & this bastard illness is killing me. I can't commit suicide cos I ain't got the balls. Its waiting game for me. Horrible just to purely exist. It's getting harder as I get older. I don't share these thoughts online but I'm having a bad one & it feels good just to type it. Cheers
You need shamanic training, we are not sick, we are special. Back in the days people like us(schizophrenics and manic depressive people) were taken under the wings of the shamans/medicine men of the tribe, where they taught us how to control our gift, or disease if you will.
I control my illness, I know other people that do too. Never give up, what you've got is a gift. Get into meditation and spirituality, learn Tarot.. DO SOMETHING with your gift, channel it.
It's no coincidence that bipolar people are superior painters, poets and artists.. we feel the world, we look at it from all angles.. we know the depths, and the heights of existance, we soar and we swim. We learn faster, we upgrade ourselves every time we go through a cycle. We're shamans, magicians, poets and playwrights... we're natural born mystics.
Channel your energy, your happiness and your depression, USE IT!.. express yourself.
Hopefully, with a little perseverance you'll see and understand that the shards of glass you've been walking on all of your life was diamonds in reality. Never forget that.. you're a beautiful soul with a beautiful mind... Don't ever pity yourself.
Stand fast...
“Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars.” Kahlil Gibran
@freedomdeep Jesus my eye! You don't have it obviously so don't poison minds with your BS. You pray to your Jesus and wait while my mania could destroy you where you stand! I am unstoppable and your God has no chance against this disease! Keep dreaming!
@freedomdeep I feel sory for your "family member" cuse they have a fool in their presence!! Good Luck, I've hd a priest touch me and try to exorcise this manic monster. He backed away! Yeah.
@Hythloday71 Because there are a lot of stigmas with Bipolar, even mental illness in itself. If are you not careful people will judge you on false information and misconceptions. Thanks for watching.
@Disenchnatedyouths Hey man I remember when we use to talk. I remember your bleeding words on paper project. I don't know if you will ever get this but it would be good to catch up with you and see how you are doing. Sorry I disappeared I was hospitalized and then forgot all the account info. I see you haven't logged since like last September, hope you see this man.
Looking forward to chapter 2 !! Good job so far. Should have let Rosetta Stoned go though, Pretty much puts lyrics to a racing mind. I have it too, For real. Gave up trying to justify and explain years ago. They don't want to know. Fear I guess.
wow...this is extremely heartfelt and raw, I like it, but I'm an advocate for speaking out and smashing stigma..however I respect your view on how to work with the disorder how it presents itself to you. I really enjoyed this video because of its rawness...that honesty that makes the viewer go.."yes I'm like this" Good work, Every Blessing..ps you may not want to hear this..but there is always hope..even if most days hope is as distant as joy, it doesn't mean it doest exist or isn't accessible.
CordeliaOphelia 1 week ago
Just wanted to say thanks to everyone who has liked and commented on this video. I was hospitalized a few weeks after I made this video, I was in a very dark place. I make some new vlogs now trying to deal and manage with Bipolar without medication. But I still think taking medication is definitely important of course. I was in a very very dark place when I made this, I am glad it has resonated well with you all. We are not alone, we can survive this Disorder and make our lives whole again.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
Thanks for making this video, and good luck.
robcoxrocks 2 weeks ago
@robcoxrocks Thanks.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
I related to nearly everything you said in that video. I wouldn't be able to live without meds either. I can tell you write a lot, I'm a prolific writer, mainly of poetry.
"...I’ll expose you to things
You’ve never seen before
Taking you to places within places
Through my blood stained floor
Things you couldn’t see, until now
Things you’ll wish never to see again..."
citcat299 1 month ago
@citcat299 I love that poetry you wrote, good stuff.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
Good video man.
MadMaxProductions111 2 months ago
@MadMaxProductions111 Ty.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
bipolar is an overproduction of serotonin in the brain which turns into adrenaline so being adrenalised constantly explains mania and what goes up must come down thus depression without medication bipolar people can stay awake for 2-3 days then collapse into sleep people need to simply take sedatives to get rest when they are awake for extended periods or scattered and energised excessafly and become grounded and focused rational mentally and have a good heart and wisdom and they will be fine
yourgameoverlord 2 months ago
@yourgameoverlord Yeah it's a vicious cycle, thanks for watching.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
What goes on in the avg persons mind if they are not always thinking about something? How is it possible to think of nothing? Ok maybe nothing of signifigance I can see, but nothing? I can't even imagine what mundane shit life is for normal people. Yes my lows really suck, but being normal looks like it sucks too, only it sucks all the time, consistently sucking, like a drone on prozac.
Lovinight 3 months ago
@Lovinight I hear what you are saying, it's crazy to think how we would be without all the knowledge we obtain from this disorder. Thank you for watching.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
FYI, while in the manic high, I have been told we can score practically off the charts of an IQ test. The high is the best, can you imagine life w/o it? That is what "normal" people get to live with, next time I do meds, f'K the mood stabilizer, I'm stickin with anti-depressants and vyvvanse (ADHD) meds. Seroquel is equalivent of medicated coma for me, scary thing is after a while I begin to like never having to wake up. No more seroquel for me. Hmm how did I wind up here?
Lovinight 3 months ago
We are willing to take the road less traveled and go it alone if we must. This place has so much suffering of all species, I find the most offensive to be, the suffering of animals by the hand of man, skinning alive animals? Everything w/in me knows this is wrong, this world is so off balance, yet they say we are the ones off balance. I wouldn't change who I am for anything! I hang on for the love I have for my son and the unconditional bond of love I finally found. I can't leave him alone.
Lovinight 3 months ago
The one most consistent feeling I always come back to is simply not wanting to be! At 13 I knew in my heart I didn't belong here, I was not cut out to make it in this world, this world is so frickin cruel to some, yet their are some who seem to thrive in it somehow. Recently I have come to the conclusion we are the way we are for a reason, their must be a purpose though I don't know what it is. I am sure it is for the good of others, deserving or not.
Lovinight 3 months ago
Please write more! I so am feeling you in such a deep and understanding way!
detra91 4 months ago
@detra91
Thank you, I have a new channel now if you ever want to check it out. I am glad you can resonate with this.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
Amazing...ty you for putting to words what I was unable to.. I feel you..Hold on tight
MrMopi73 5 months ago
@MrMopi73 Thank you I appreciate it.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
that was beautiful, and i know know one else can feel love, hate and apathy the way we do, i applaud you for putting this out here. after 10 years of medication i am off of them and i never plan on going back on them no matter the consequences. medicated or not the lonliness will always be here. and to daniel bowden, i never would have thought the the shards of glass could actually be diamonds. but either way yhey wouldnt understand and even if they could, they'd never be able to feel it like us
1982JOlivas 6 months ago
@1982JOlivas Yes I hear you,
we definitely exceed the boundaries of human emotion. I am also now trying to live and manage without the medication. Thank you for watching.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
This has been flagged as spam show
The Citizens Commission on Human Rights (CCHR) is a nonprofit mental health watchdog, responsible for helping to enact more than 150 laws to protecting from abusive or coercive practices. CCHR has fought to restore basic human rights in mental health, including, full informed consent regarding the medical legitimacy of psychiatric diagnosis, the Risks of psychiatric treatments,and the Right to ReFuSe any TreatmenT. Dont lock the door abuse and humiliate and call it help ! it didnt ! f that !
AkathisiA101 6 months ago
bipolar sufferer myself and that pushed every button,thank you 4 ur verse and video it was fantastic.
crazyshaz1967 7 months ago
@crazyshaz1967 Your welcome, and thank you.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
Thanks for posting this oh so real and raw video of what we actually go through. I wish other people understood , so people like you are a rare gift. I know what you are going through and it fucking sucks but there has to be a reason for our suffereing . Liike you said we evolve faster and i believe there will come a time when our wisdom, and strength from our sufffering will be needed. I hope you don't hide who youa re from the world like u said you were going too because u are f***ing amazing
MsRachdawg 8 months ago
@MsRachdawg Wow, thank you. Yeah it's hard going through life without the poeple around us understanding what we are going through or what we have gone through. Thank you for your kind comments they are greatly appreciated. And I agree with you there has to be a reason for all the madness. I am also now done hiding from this and I want to help others and help myself to live a better life. Thank you for your words, it means a lot.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
THIS IS THE REST OF MY COMMENT BELOW .......... THE JUDGE ALL OF A SUDEN I WAS DEFINATLY GUILTY AND CRAZY AND DANGEROUS JUST CAUSE HE HEARD BIPOLAR AND IM ACTUALLY A VERY KIND HEARTED PERSON I WAS A FIREFIGHTER FOR 4 YEARS I RISKED MY LIFE FOR OTHERS TO LIVE AND RUN RESCUE FOR TWO I CARED SO MUCH I WOULD CHECK UP ON SOME OF THE PEOUPLE WE CARRIED TO THE HOSPITAL TO SEE HOW THEY WERE BUT THIS IS A FUCKED UP CRUEL WORLD AND I HOPE THIS COMMENT LETS U KNOW SOMEONE DID FEEL UR WORDS IT HURTS ALWAYS.
cameronjohnson68 9 months ago
@cameronjohnson68 Wow, damn thanks a lot man I really appreciate it. I remember I was in a very dark place when I made this video. I am very glad you heard all this and that it spoke to you. Your comment means a lot I really do appreciate it.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
I FEEL SO CLOSE TO U NOT TO KNOW U AT ALL IM 29 IV BEEN SICK SINCE I WAS 6 AND SO MUCH OF WHAT U SAID MAKES ME FEEL GOOD TO KNOW IM NOT CRAZY AND SOMEONE ELSE KNOWS HOW I FEEL I NEVER WENT THROUGH THE STUFF U DID AFTER UR GRANDMOTHER DIED BUT EVERYTHING BEFORE THAT IS IF U WERE IN MY HEAD I MADE THE MISTAKE OFF BEING OPEN WITH IT NOW I GET SO MUCH SHIT FROM DOIN SO IV NEVER BEEN IN MUCH TROUBLE BUT I WAS IN A FIGHT IN COURT THEY BROUGHT UP I WAS BIPOLAR THE JUDGES WHOLE ATTITUDE CHANGED
cameronjohnson68 9 months ago
the music choice is so good, the 2nd song played was so so melancholic, like the happy emptiness of mania.
triplejpm 11 months ago
@triplejpm Thanks for watching, yeah the 2nd song was a Tool song off that album 10,000 days.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
It's really not crazy. I understand completely. I have been very similarly frustrated with endless explanations to people who can never truly understand. It does make one feel terribly alone.
updownjunkie 11 months ago
@updownjunkie Yes it really does. I have had those same endless explanations as well. Thank you for watching.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
Comment removed
CodeV114 1 year ago
I'm nearly 36 & this bastard illness is killing me. I can't commit suicide cos I ain't got the balls. Its waiting game for me. Horrible just to purely exist. It's getting harder as I get older. I don't share these thoughts online but I'm having a bad one & it feels good just to type it. Cheers
DanielBowden1975 1 year ago
Comment removed
CodeV114 1 year ago
@CodeV114 Cheers mate nice one
DanielBowden1975 1 year ago
Comment removed
CodeV114 1 year ago
@DanielBowden1975 your not alone. I have some past regrets that are killing me.
kambridge967 11 months ago
@DanielBowden1975
You need shamanic training, we are not sick, we are special. Back in the days people like us(schizophrenics and manic depressive people) were taken under the wings of the shamans/medicine men of the tribe, where they taught us how to control our gift, or disease if you will.
I control my illness, I know other people that do too. Never give up, what you've got is a gift. Get into meditation and spirituality, learn Tarot.. DO SOMETHING with your gift, channel it.
WB2RM 9 months ago
@DanielBowden1975
It's no coincidence that bipolar people are superior painters, poets and artists.. we feel the world, we look at it from all angles.. we know the depths, and the heights of existance, we soar and we swim. We learn faster, we upgrade ourselves every time we go through a cycle. We're shamans, magicians, poets and playwrights... we're natural born mystics.
Channel your energy, your happiness and your depression, USE IT!.. express yourself.
WB2RM 9 months ago
@DanielBowden1975
Hopefully, with a little perseverance you'll see and understand that the shards of glass you've been walking on all of your life was diamonds in reality. Never forget that.. you're a beautiful soul with a beautiful mind... Don't ever pity yourself.
Stand fast...
“Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars.” Kahlil Gibran
WB2RM 9 months ago
@WB2RM So awesome that you reached out to respond to this person.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
@DanielBowden1975 Thank you for watching, I hear you.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
Great Film and yes, WE are alone!
MrRapidcyclerforever 1 year ago
@MrRapidcyclerforever Thank you for watching.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
a very well thought out film. 5 stars..... ( I have it too, though not as severe i guess).
hangmeinabottle 1 year ago
@hangmeinabottle Thanks for watching.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
i understand,got it
Lisaserene1 1 year ago
@Lisaserene1 Thank you.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
Yeah.
reverseblackhole 1 year ago
@reverseblackhole Ty.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
Comment removed
MrUndeserving 1 year ago
Jesus is the way, he will heal you. Thank you for being so bold to share your secrets...it was so similar to a family member that has it as well.
freedomdeep 1 year ago
@freedomdeep Jesus my eye! You don't have it obviously so don't poison minds with your BS. You pray to your Jesus and wait while my mania could destroy you where you stand! I am unstoppable and your God has no chance against this disease! Keep dreaming!
MrRapidcyclerforever 1 year ago
@freedomdeep I feel sory for your "family member" cuse they have a fool in their presence!! Good Luck, I've hd a priest touch me and try to exorcise this manic monster. He backed away! Yeah.
MrRapidcyclerforever 1 year ago
@freedomdeep I am glad for that, thanks for watching.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
Why keep it secret ?
Hythloday71 1 year ago
@Hythloday71 Because there are a lot of stigmas with Bipolar, even mental illness in itself. If are you not careful people will judge you on false information and misconceptions. Thanks for watching.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
kinda want to erase memory of the others who take this for granted
MyKindOnly1 1 year ago
Congratulations... I Crown You for this brother.
MyKindOnly1 1 year ago
@MyKindOnly1 Thank you for watching.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
Excellent. It takes one to know one.
saltyeggs71 2 years ago
@saltyeggs71 Sure does.....
MrUndeserving 1 year ago
@MrUndeserving Thanks for thinking of me. I appricate it.
saltyeggs71 1 year ago
Great video....What Meds do you take?
r6guy1 2 years ago
This video gave me chills.
I applaud you.
Just know this, you're not alone.
Disenchnatedyouths 2 years ago
@Disenchnatedyouths me too, struck a nerve
MrUndeserving 1 year ago
@Disenchnatedyouths Hey man I remember when we use to talk. I remember your bleeding words on paper project. I don't know if you will ever get this but it would be good to catch up with you and see how you are doing. Sorry I disappeared I was hospitalized and then forgot all the account info. I see you haven't logged since like last September, hope you see this man.
SuperBipolarMan 1 week ago
Looking forward to chapter 2 !! Good job so far. Should have let Rosetta Stoned go though, Pretty much puts lyrics to a racing mind. I have it too, For real. Gave up trying to justify and explain years ago. They don't want to know. Fear I guess.
creager300 2 years ago