Added: 3 years ago
From: kanzi92
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  • So people didn't listen to it all the part about emo and stuff is the person calling them selfs that! Not calling all self harmers attention seeking emo etc

  • Thats me

  • is it just me or does it sound like theres a stitch at 3:41 (after she says congrats, you just self injured, theres something missing and then u here -uicide (sounds like suicide)) is it just me or was there a chunk of it that was erased? kanzi92, if you happen to read this, i would really appreciate it if you could at least PM me if not a public message. and if you did edit something out, i really wanna listen to it. thanks for this amazing video.

  • @TheUnknownWonder she pauses and says "SI" 

  • @thestarinuri hmm listening very closely does make it sound like SI but its kind of out of context, i think theres suppose to be something there that's been removed (Perhaps she didn't see fit to add) i wish she would read this comment, the last day (according to her account info) she logged in was the day this vid was posted

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  • thsi is good

  • oh wow! hun you are amazing!

  • umm, I'm not a 16 year old girl, I'm a 21 year old male.

  • @thegigm I'm a 24 male, but the same idea still applies....This is how i feel.....

  • @ColonelFleet i think i was just being pedantic, sorry.

  • @thegigm wow....your using big words.....i had to look that one up......but i'm quite serious.......

  • I closed my eyes and listened to it. That really tells alot of us. I hate having those few friends that would never accept you. Never accept me. I put on that fale smile every day and call myself an actress, bjt inside i dont think I am good enough to be an actress. I try to hide my scars in ever possible ways and my latest excuse for a bruise is that someone kicked me in a game of soccer. When truthfully, I kicked myself. I Was climbing a tree, and the bark made me bleed, when truthfully it wa

  • @HannahAndSadie remember this, best actors in the world are those that are not known. people that can act on stage are great actors, but people that act on the life's stage are beyond talented, acting on stage is easy, everyone knows its pretend so they decide to go along with it. in real life, you're not just acting, your acting to fool the whole world around you. so just the fact that you can manage to hide yourself, proves your a better actor than any fake actors you see on TV

  • wow that was amazing way to go

  • aweeyahh, thats the stuff... hit so precisely, amazingly well done *standing ovation*

  • "...Safe, safe from being you"

  • wow you did a great job this sounds like me

  • This is so good, more people should listen to this because it's so true!

    Good job.

  • This is maybe the most beautiful thing I've ever listened to, I think it's so horrible that so many people go through this all the time, every day. I go through this a lot and it kinda helps to here someone else talk about it.

  • This is so true. It's scary. The ending was my life almost. Smile and laugh like there is nothing wrong. I get told all the time how I'm one of the happiest people they know and never am sad "It's so cool". If they knew I'd be just another freak in their mind I know... Oh well.

    It really does help if you mention falling before they think to ask. Nobody suspects a thing then...

  • @Tori534 I have exactly the same problem! Everyone thinks i'm happy, because i always smile. They just don't even notice that it's not my "old" smile, my happy smile. A friend of mine accidentaly saw the scars and cuts,.. she now treats me like an outcast and a freak.

    Don't people around you think it's suspicious if you fall daily? I mean ... I was always a klutz, but even i don't fall every day. I'm so scared they'll find out!

  • Just because we cut or self injure DOES NOT mean we are emo, freaks, or losers. We ARE NOT attention seekers. We ARE NOT abnormal. And we ARE NOT failures. You are uneducated, and honestly, you should know what you are talking about before you talk about an issue like this.

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  • This is completely what it's like.... :(

  • this is exactly what it is like.

  • :( this is so sad

  • Now I'm queezy, great :(

  • Wow this was really good and i sat here and felt like wow someone understands and get it. Thanks for sharing some ppl might get it other might still not care. Just know for those who are in the same boat... I total understand.

  • WOOOOOW bravo! I closed my eyes and listened to you and heard me.

  • oh fuck you! you acting like you know what it really feels like!

  • @blackblood1029 bit harsh don't u think?

  • i thought i would like this video, but i've had to pause it at 0:53 because it's too upsetting and offensive to listen to.

    I know i'm not ACTUALLY being called a 'freak' or 'emo' or an attention seeker, but it sounds that way, i'm not watching this anymore.

    I find it upsetting

  • It took nearly dying to help me stop, I'll make the vid later.

  • This is so triggering :[ but I LOVED this :)

  • This also overwhelmed me, it triggered my urge, I failed at trieing to contain the urge :/ but great poem..

  • COMPLETELY AMAZING !

  • Beautiful! So relateable! ... Quiet down people and listen to the words before leaving horrible comments, not very nice.

    I think this is amazing! I think this should be shown on TV!

  • I thought she was making fun of people who SI at first too, she's saying it feels and what it seems like to people who SI.

  • I CAN ABSOLUTELY RELATE TO THIS!!!!!!

  • so true

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  • help!

  • so true............very true in my case.........

  • T_T....Such a great poem.

  • simmalar

  • discribes me 100%....help me

  • sounds like me :(

  • I know were your comming from, I'm fourteen years old and I self harm I listened to this and I got the hope and faith to tell someone about my secret addiction.. Thanks

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  • It scares me how much this completely describes my life.

  • Wow , I totally relate , great poem :)

  • This is amazing.. I totally understand this.

  • Wow, this overwhelmed me..

  • beautiful.

  • love it x

  • OH..MY..GOD!

    that was beautiful! seriously, these are the exact words and instances that describe my life and feelings.

  • "no wonder he hates you, everything he said about you was true" - i've been there - in there alone

    are you self harming? you seem to be very filled with control to be able to read this part and write it

    "the pain is comfort" - :(

    "nobody knows and nobody wants to know" very true - people cannot help it so they don't want to know - they want it to vanish from their eyes

    fail etc

    "if other knew of your struggle" -

    the struggle to control emotions that are very intense - wow

  • "nobody can hurt you because ur already hurting yourself"

    that makes me understand a lot of the mechanism in self injury - it's about control - when you are hurting yourself you are in control of your pain and if you will stop hurting yourself the world will hurt you and THAT you cannot efford - the problem is you STILL lose control

    all about control :( the need for security within control or something

  • "nobody can hurt you because ur already hurting yourself" damn... reminds me of some lyrics. fear the opponent who has nothing to lose, for he has already won

  • beautiful.

  • so amazing, its unreal.

  • so so true.

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  • wow...this is amazing.

  • SO true!!!! wow very powerful did u write this or find it sumwhere?

  • this video is amazing.

  • oh my god, this is so true. i'm crying again. all i do is cry. cut and cry and slap and punch and bite! everything in this vid is tru ... i'm sorry you had to go through this, i'm sorry anyone has to go through this.

  • i think wat shes saying is that some ppl will think of themselves as a freak i do but its because all ppl call me that even my best friends

  • im not a freak

  • i dont think theyr saying that u r a freak, i think they mean that other people will think you r... i know people think i am....

  • i cut..so are u saying im a fuck up..thats nice.

  • i think you've expressed how many ppl feel that do this. me being one of them thanks for posting ur story it helps to know ur not alone.

  • wow this video says it all...I get so discusted for hurting myself but it feels like there is nothing i can do to stop it. Im glad i finally heard my story from someone else. it helped me realize that i need to find some help.

  • i agree, i used to cut daily. i have scars head to toe. i used to feel so cheap and useless and that i shouldntbe here.. My parents had alot of fights and i always felt like it was my fault. i was kicked out of schools because i was a hazard to other people because i used to cut. I have nothing left. but im still not going to give up. if i can hang in there and not do that one more cut. i think everyone can..

    Goodluck with your life, and your problem. i hope it all works out for you.

    James

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  • Christ... so.. it's some kind of mental disease you can't help?

  • yeah it is

  • *sobs*

    my life story.

    inside and out.

  • wow...this is true...but no we're not freaks. we are self-injurers..deal with it.

  • thats wat i do and how i feel

  • I try so hard. The urge is so strong. I dont want to but I really fear I will.

  • wow .... beautiful :)

  • this video hits home..i fight everyday with this..

  • wow. alot of emotion into that. sounded so, poetic. It must have come from the heart, and it was just wow. it makes me feel shame becuz some of this relates to me, leaving me shameful. hope ur not depressed i'll pray for you, wheather you are depressed or not! ^^

  • went straiht into my heart... really sad and true...

  • wow amazing, thats so true..

  • wow, this is amazing. and so true.

  • that was really good

  • This is so true...

    And you have a beautiful voice - it would be more beautiful without those sad words...

  • Wow. Im in a good mood and still think I suck at life.

  • wow. again: true. i know exactly how this feels.

  • this is so true ...

    im amazed..

  • that was amazing n_n

    i self harm because of mental illness but i lie to the psychologists why they ask me if i still do

    its true it is something u hide coz alot of peepz think it is attention seeking

    only advice i have is if you havnt told some one tell some1 u can trust and get help before it gets worse

  • Amazing.

  • This is pretty good I give you a five! I think that hardest part of it all is faking a smile hiding the cuts burns brusies isnt soo hard but the fake smile is the hardest to learn it gets easier after a while though

  • For the first time I watched this video, and didn't have the urge to self injure. This is good. There is hope.

  • This is really, really good.:]

    I wish you didn't understand this so well, though.

  • that was beautiful, so true.

  • thats true

  • amazing.

  • wow. that was beautiful. so true. so true.

  • wow.... this is .... moving,gripping perhaps... I'm a cutter... never got into the other forms of self injury though. I use to do it as a way just to feel alive... I was so numb all the time that I needed to feel the pain, to see the blood because if I could feel it, and see it that meant I was still alive on some leval.

  • this is true, it happened to me, i tried to stop, so many times, but its not working... it is getting worse, now its really hard to stop, if i do, i get a rash like thing on my arms where i do cut, all bupy and itchy, and i scratch my arm raw... i need to stop, but its so hard.. and noone willhelp in any way, they dont understand.. at all.. this is why its soo hard to do anything, i cant have friends, go outside, for fear that they will all look at me and hate me.. but this explains all that ..

  • how do you bruise so bad? i dont bruise...but i scar really bad

  • if anyone will help me with this...i am trying to quit. plz message me

  • this was..wow..my mind?

    i'm trying to quit, it's working..slowly..i hope.. but i can share my victories with someone who helps me with this, who supports me.. who makes me believe i can..

    that's important, believing it yourself..believing you can stop.. it's hard..so damn hard.. but everytime i get an attack i call him and he talks me through it..at school i can go to him..he helps me..

    but the lies to others keep going, and the wall that seperates me gets bigger..but some day i'll be free..

  • I missed the trigger warning at the beginning, but I'll tell you this is accurately describes the thoughts. I've done this way too much, some nights it is the only way I can get to sleep. I'm slowly learning how to hide my self injury. It's amazing how judgmental people are; they don't know how much every comment kills. They don't feel the pain that we do. They don't understand our torturous pasts. The can't; they haven't lived our lives and the mere thought of our actions makes them cringe.

  • same here, some nights, the only way i can get to sleep is to self injure, at four in the morning, its not good, all the people in my class that know,they always check me, and get really angry every time they find a new one

  • Not enough people know where it is too much of a problem and those that do know aren't bold enough to check. I'm a pretty big guy and they think that I might hurt them, but truth be told I couldn't hurt anyone or anything for that matter... I cried after hitting a butterfly while driving.

  • thank you sooooo much you have know idea how much you just helped me

  • Thank you so much for this video. You have no idea what this did for me

  • insanely amazing!!

  • fuckin straight from my mind to your mouth. oh fucking hell

  • This was a really good video. You didn't glamourise it and make it horrid with unnecessary pictures, but told it the way it is and let the truth speak instead. People really need to see this. Understand that this isn't something to be superficilised with labels like 'emo' and other pointless hurtful stereotypes. Understand that starting because of a stupid gamourisation of cutting and being 'emo' has stormed our generation, is utterly idiotic. Thankyou for being brave enough to make this video.

  • oh. my. god.

    im speechless.

  • That was really beautiful and so true!

    To xBrokenxWhispersx yeah more people really should watch these videos but it was through watching these that I was firs triggered to cut so I don't really know should they. There should be something done in schools though to educate people on the subject because ivery few people understand it properly.

    Xx

  • i thougt i was the only one that felt that way

    i'm not so alown in the world

  • Im a 13 year old who self harms. only yesterday was i up in my bedroom cryin my eyes out thinking of how i could commit suicide...i have 73 cuts up my arms and legs. i normally take 20 minutes in the bath. i always wear long sleeves and neither my parents or relatives know...please help me before its too late...x

  • I wish I could help you *hug* but please search for help and just try to stand away from knives just don't do it. sounds easier than it is but it's worth it to try it.

  • im 13 too i used to self cut and i fight the erge to do it daily keep yourself busy it helps i started to write stories it helped even though most of the stories were sad it's so hard to do it but its possable

  • wow...

  • I wish more people watched videos like these, then maybe they might understand what a self harmer actually goes through. it's not just cutting, there is so much more to it.

  • holy shit! that was amazing. beautiful.

  • ppl feel how i do?im trying to quit but cant...any help?

  • thats a problem im trying to overcome too. i cant do though..and i dont really want to do it. ugh

  • ya i keep a razor in my wallet, but one of my friends found it and now im the "freak" or emo that is aleinated by everyone... and that just makes it worse

  • i keep a razor in my purse...no ones found it yet..

  • people found out i used to cut because i was betrayed now in school people take their pencils and make cutting mostions on their amrs to me and make jokes like "haha make sure emo doesnt cut you too" its really aufawl i sit at the "Freak/loser" table at lunch but at least in know they are my true friends who wont betray me

  • thats terrible!i know how u feel,my friends are like wtf? what wrong with you and then my "best friend" prentends to care but all she says is that so bad! never do that again and then she ignores it and pretends like it doent happen,or makes little jokes about it and it hurts!im so sorry! i know how you feel

  • i hate when people do that!! they pretend to care, to stand by you, for a few days, "protect" you, but then they turn on you, become one of them. i would rather them say that i'm a freak and leave me there, at least they would be telling the truth, instead of trying to live a lie.

  • i know how you feel once at my old school some people found out (the teachers didnt know yet) i had a plastic spork in my hand and this dude walked up (i was infront of like 5 teachers) and said hey take that spork away befor she goes to the corner over there and kills her self. then everybody at lunch found out soon the whole school knew...

  • i went through the same thing too. my freind hugged me one day and noticed that i was hiding my arm, he grabbed it and got really mad, and then, when we got to class, he told people, he was all, see her, yea look at her arm, its covered in cuts. one kid was gona go tho the counselor, he grabed my arm and demanded i show tham. i just yanked out of his grasp and ran to my class in tears.. but like, you noe i have friends who accept me, no mater what i do

  • wow. great job describing this. it all describes exactly what i think before i self injure. <3

  • ...wow... ppl acualy feel n act like me 2...?

  • This is very powerful. I had a student who told me she self harmed. I was able to persuade her see a councellor, I hope it helped her.

  • this is amazing!

    i'm defintely favoroting this.

    i've been a self injurer for about 2 years and no one understands it.

    thanks so much for making this.

  • wow.

  • beautiful.

  • people can cut like me and there should be no problem. Leave us alone!

  • Ouch...

    That hit home.

    -sigh-

    I was 'clean' for about 5 months and then I relapsed.

  • That was one of the colest things to what I feel that I have ever heard. Thank you for posting this video.

  • wow.. so true /:

  • viewtifuljoe123......maybe some people want to die though but dont want to leave loved 1ns

  • I love this. <3

  • yeah it is very true but once uve started theres no goin bak its been 4 years since i started and i still self harm but at the end of the day it has to stop sometime i hope things get betta for you all good luk xxxx

  • this is so true.. ive been cutting for 4 years now. it is so hard not being able to tell anyone what you go through. it is so incredibly addicting. i know i cant stop. but it is slowly ruining my life. i do it almost daily i just dont know how to stop

  • this is the best video ive seen bii far

  • this is really true!! this is how i feel. i have been cutting for the last two years and i still have a major problem. at this point i have over 100 cuts and 12 stiches and this is soo true! thank oyu for the vid!

  • dude (viewtifuljoe123) people who do self harm don't nececeraly want to do it, it is something that has happened to them in their past that causes them to self harm. don't disrespect people who do it, if you don't understand it.

  • I need to hurt myself soo bad, but i can't. i don't want people to see the marks. but it's just so hard to fight the feeling. i can't take it!

  • This is too damn true. It's scary that I do this to myself... it scares me that I don't have control over myself. I've never crossed the line before, like cut my arm too deep, but I am so afraid that one day I will get to angry, nervous, hurt, anything that will just set me off.

  • Your video is amazing, you are so good with words. I cut...and everything you said was dead on. its not fun...but its nice to have it put in words, like it makes sense and its described so well.

    great job

  • I used to cut myself, and I knoe people who do. I did it when I was younger, and then I stoped, and started again a few years later, and recently I stoped again, but sometimes I think about it, but I dom't because I know it's bad for me.

  • I understand this feeling...We may not start for the same reason but in the end we are all after the numbness that follows the pain...It's nirvna...I did it for 4 years...No one knows...I haven't done it in months...But it's an addiction...How do you get help when no one cares?

  • Oh My god

    I was like its me

    It was like listening to me and it described perfectly how I am - except I am 17 not 16.

    Its amazing

    Well done its an exceptional video

  • wow...so right. i cut too and i was gripping onto my chair to not race upstairs and cut my arm lose..soo hard when you don't find victory in resisting the urge..i know the feeling.

    you've made a great video...more people schould see this

  • OMG! that was incredible..

    as the comment below states, it does describe the pain and the fight..

    that was incredible..

  • This is perfect!

    EVERY SINGLE WORD was perfect.

    I've never seen or heard anything that describes the struggle of self injury so well. The entire thing is my life, word for word. The bruises on my face, the cuts on my arm. Everything.

    I just wanted to leave this comment to thank you for your eloquence in describing your/mine/our struggle. Thank you.

  • WOW, that's an amazing poem- did you write it? Very unique take to self injury awareness- love it.

  • wow, that was amazing, you captured self injury so well.

  • That was an amazing poem! I used to be a cutter.

    I started cutting in my senior year of HS and after 5 years and 3 psych hospital stays I am better. I still think about cutting but I no longer feel the urge to cut. I still have scars covering my legs and left arm (I'm totally right handed).

    Just recently I started putting Mederma on the scars on my left arm. That's a big step for me, while I was cutting I never treated my cuts or burns. It's amazing that more of them didn't get infected.

  • the sad thing is when i do it i dont even remaber doing it i black out and when i wack up theres blood every were and i have to clean it up but i have to do it fast so no one knows about it i jut wish some one under stuned the pain i feel but now thx to these vids of slef harm on youtube i know im not alone

  • and now you also know that it is possible to move through this and prevail...

  • holy shit....

    that is exactely how i am, i have been cutting for almost three years now and recently i was forced to leave my high school because of it, and EVERYONE knew about it, now im that emo suicidal girl... no one even needs to say my name anymore. and my i am most likely going to be expelled from a school that i love. because of cutting, and because i cant tell them what you have said. thank you.

  • well put. That is a account of my daily life.

  • There is hope to recover from self harm. I stopped after 15 years, anyone that wishes to recover can do it. message me for more info on stopping.

  • I wish I could understand your pain..I wish people would hear your silent screams.. I hope some day your pain will subside and you won't have to hurt anymore..please don't give up it can get better

  • You're a great wrtitter & speaker,

    this is such an honist account of our daily lives, without all the "glamorising" of it from photos.

    Thanks for posting it.

    Hope your doing alright in your fight.

    Keep going.

    xox

  • yeah i know how it feels. in school i break pens and go to the bathroom and schrach the shit with the sharp peices from it. it makes me feel good for a little while and then wen its over i feel realy guilty and horrible. great job you got all the facts right. good luck in life and the best of wishes.

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