I'm sorry but this film is terrible. Awful script, piss-poor acting and worst of all, an insufferable sense of self-importance that permeates the entire god-forsaken film.
the thing is, i guess he is viewing it with no outside influences and a kind of un-biased take compared to most of us. i know i don't like it but its also a sin to like it these days.
I watched this movie the first time just like all other guys thinking that this shit stinks only for small 12 year old girls , man I was so wrong, it was the stupid ass media that fucked it for guys
@eddywards84 I do actually kinda agree that it doesn't deserve ALL the bad press it's got, because now it's just a magnet for hate basically. But I'd still say it was crap and boring, and it's really cheesy. You can't just generalise that all men hate romance and that's why we dislike it, it's just that men aren't affected by the soppy side of it, and it's therefore easy for us to see what a bad movie it is...
i really is a very good film, it gets such bad mass reviews from males purely i think because of a macho culture, any film with a romance is soppy and rubbish. However, despite the romance this is not all about a romance this is about conflicting hidden worlds, which have effects on any relationship developing, but at the centre of it, is a believable romance, with is driven by character development and an ever moving narrative
@eddywards84 ...except that the characters are totally unbelievable, Edward is borderline abuse, and their is almost zero character development throughout. That's probably why it gets bad reviews. Also, the plots make little sense, and the dialogue is strung together with cliches and poor delivery.
@eddywards84: "it gets such bad mass reviews from males purely i think because of a macho culture"
Uhm, bollocks. Sure, there certainly are some who derile this movie simply because it's "too girly". But one of the reasons why I hate this movie is *because I'm a feminist*. Twillight is deeply misogynistic and anti-sex.
I can't believe Mark Kermode didn't slate this film! I used to find Mark Kermode's opinions pretty bang on, even if I didn't agree with them. But his embrace of this film, and his thorough slating of Pineapple Express have made me start to re-evaluate if I can trust this man with my cinematic well being! I will have to see if he has done a review of Paul yet. If he slates that then I don't know ...the future looks rocky. Maybe its because I'm not a 15 year old girl so I just don't get it.
@TankMacnamara81 I wanted him to write off Twilight completely for the box office schlock that it is, not play this devil's advocate crap and throw everyone for a loop just to put himself on the fringes of the movie critic culture.
The dialogue in Twilight makes me cringe so badly. I want to scrunch a photo of a kitten or something whenever I hear the mary sue self insert and sore excuse of a vampire talk.
I think you're approaching Kermode's review from the wrong POV - he's mad on genre convention, hence the long discussion of apparent 'inspirations'. It works on the terms it sets out.
Oh Kermode, Kermode, Kermode. You do try too hard to go against the grain.
There's no denying this film's utter awfulness. The only way I could understand someone of Kermode's knowledge liking it is as one of those "so bad it's good" films that you throw on when a friend comes round.
Catherine Hardwicke is no Kathryn Bigelow (and not as hot either). Let's not forget Miss Bigelow directed the far more superior vampire classic NEAR DARK. What Catherine needs is my big brown dong, slapping her in the face until she says: "I promise Jace, no more ill-conceived shit attempts at fairytales!" Didn't MK say the Twilight series was better than Star Wars? Shame on him!
I love Mark Kermode He just gets film and can see the point of both the Twilight movies and Rob Pattinson. The camera just loves him and I think K is hilarious when he describes Edward's first appearance. Too many critics dissed the film because it appeals to girls, yet praise drivel like Independence Day because it has explosions and airplanes. Kermode is the best broadcasting film critic in the British Isles. Honest and brave.
The best thing about Kermode is that he (unlike a lot of people posting here) understand the concept of a "genre" film and target audience. Sure, the film doesn't make a profound statement and it's unlikely to appear on any critics' best of lists, but it achieves rather well what it sets out to do, and will undoubtedly appease the audience it was made for. Wish more people could grasp this concept and not assume any film aimed at teenagers is automatically shite.
@surprisedbyjoy1804 At least once a year, Mark Kermode will make one seemingly orchestrated "against the grain" statement or theory to keep up his status as a 'maverick'. For instance: "Johnny Depp ruined Pirates Of The Caribbean", "Daniel Craig is the best Bond ever", "3D will die out" (although I hope this last one's true). I don't really see this as any different. I'm sure he enjoyed the films in a sheepish sort of way, but I'm not buying any justification for it being any more than that.
OK i am yet to muster strenght to watch this movie......shud i watch this movie guys, keeping in mind that i like movies like se7en....any suggestions
So erm, he likes it? WTF!? And he doesn't like Watchmen, or Dark Knight, or The Shining? I watched the whole review waiting for him to say "actually it's crap".
Twilight was just average...i couldn't really get into it :¬/ i couldnt get my head round why Bella couldnt just go out with a normal person?! and why cant she cheer the fuck up!
@eschultz711 he's honest. he had higher expectations for kill bill because he feels emotionally invested in quentin tarantino's career. it's why he's such an interesting critic. you and i disagree with him, but it doesn't make us better critics.
@eschultz711 Well, I haven't seen any of the Twilight films; I don't think I'd like them, but I won't cast judgment prematurely. As for Kill Bill, I didn't like it very much.
Reason why The film is better than the book. Its shorter ;D. The twilight books is possibly the worst book i've read. Also, Why are they In love? They having nothing in common, Nothing that shows its love. I don't have a problem with Vampires being in the sun light, as In past novels they could survive in Light but they became weaker. However if they Sparkle, That annoys me. ;D
Well if you like your males to act more like a girl than you do then twilight is your movie....I agree with those that say it was dull and really had no plot and personally I would rather have to read a dictionary through twice than to read another of Meyers books again.
Well it's aimed a teens so teens are gonna like it and lots of older people like it too. I am 25 and love Twilight. If u don't like it fine. But i would like to see u do better.
Near Dark. Good flick. You notice they never say the "V" word? Vampire is never uttered in it. I want more from Bigelow! I've never seen any Twilight films, am I missing much?
"The background - the hard work - I can do and you can join in with the fluff." Quotes like this are the reason I've grown to love Kermode so much. What a badass.
I think Kermode is too lenient, he over-compensates his view by assuming the position of the target audience. 'if i were a dumb teenage girl I'd love this.'
There is always an element of this in criticism, but it seems he becomes far too lenient and lost as sense of his own taste.
Twilight, Street Dance 3d? He keeps going on about this terrible films, but keeps beating over your head saying they're not for you, they're not for you.
"I have a daughter right in the middle of the target audience."
Get. Her. Out. Of. The. Cult!
Edward is an abusive, controlling creep who sabotages her car, isolates her from her friends, is jealous, makes her lie to her father, treathens her with suicide, doesn't allow her to disagree with her or make personal choises and practically stalks her!
And this is what the author and the fans call True Love. No, it's abuse. Period.
@missoujei I do agree in some ways but he is trying to protect her. To be fair the only suicide he threatens her with is his own & thats only in response to her death. He does effectively isolate her by not telling her to hang out with people like Jess, Angela, Mike, Eric etc. but he's not doing it deliberately. He's not trying to hurt her, just trying to make her happy.
@prigg88 It's still emotional blackmail and has no place in a healthy relationship, deliberate or not. He's not the only asshole in the series, mind you: Bella's father is an absolute dick: "a guy molested you? Hah! Good for him :D" and Jacob is no better than Edward, really. My problem isn't how these characters behave - they're fictional. But the author and the fans call this relationship which manages to pretty much fill the domestic abuse check list true love. And that's disturbing.
@missoujei is it really emotional blackmail? How does he blackmail Bella by saying don't die or I'll kill myself. Most people don't want to die at any rate. TBH, its unhealthy in the fact that a human is after a vampire and that if they get intimate, he might accidentally kill her or turn her into a vampire. I agree - none of the characters are great. Bella emotionally blackmails Edward in Eclipse to stay away from the fight.
@missoujei Its true love in the sense that they can't live without each other. Whether its a healthy relationship is another thing entirely. At the end of breaking dawn once they're both vamps, I think it is a healthy relationship.
TBH, I think its whats interesting about the story in that what would you do for love? Would you love a vampire? would you become a vampire for him? Would you fall for a werewolf, knowing you don't have to change for him? etc.
@missoujei I would say I'm probably on the same side as kermode on this. I love the concept of the story and themes etc. rather than the actual characters etc.
In the books, I think I would fall for Edward but in the movie version, I don't think I would. I doubt I would fall for Jacob in either version.
@prigg88 Each to their own, but I can't get over the way the relationships are portrayed in the movies and the books. The themes I find disturbing (abstinence, infantilization of women ect) and frankly I think there are a lot better YA books for girls to read. The positive thing about the franchise is that a female author has received so much publicity with a series of books with a female protagonist, marketed at teenage girls. I just whish it wasn't so poor in quality.
I really hated Twilight. The books are written with equal sophistication to Mills and Boone and the characters, particularly Damsel in Distress, Bella, are vacuous cyphers. There's no hint of humour, no tongue in cheek, just heavy handed "symbolism" and unsympathetic characters. It really annoys me that great kids books like Harry Potter and shows like Buffy, which was a classic, are tarred with the same brush as stuff like this.
These guys are barmy. This movie was atrocious. It actively fought against having anything interesting happen. Pattinson and Stewart are so drippy, mumbly, crass, and unlikeable I was actively praying we focus on the other characters.
I went to see it with my girl and we both walked out of the theater like we'd been date-raped: tired, confused, angry, and not sure what to take it out on.
Kermode was not necessarily saying he liked it, just that he thought it did what it was supposed to do well. Which was basically to cash in on teenagers who have a lot of angst and are horny. He was just mentioning he's not part of the intended audience (i.e. teenage girls.) I am however and I can't stand the movie or books.
@Enoemen I think Kermode looks at this too much, he's become like an executive producer critic. Is the FILM good or not, not its business viability!!?
It bored me senseless and also New Moon which is even worse. It's like watching an episode of Dawson's Creek with Vamps. Kirsten Stewart is truly awful, Pattison just about holds it together. How this tripe ever got greenlit..Cherr Ching!
im usually with kermode but this was waaaaaaaaay off. twilight was really bad, the acting/direction/script and in general the shallow teen girl fantasy. very irritating film and worse review
Well, you heard what he said about gary oldman in the dark knight? that he was a better actor than heath ledger...and this is from a guy who loved twilight. And I'm not saying gary oldman sucks, but apparently we can't tell who's a better actor or actress in movies...only kermode can
What in the world is this guy talking about? First of all the book sucks balls....and the main dude in the movie is horrible....I think kermode won't say what he really thinks about the main dude in the movie it is because the star is a brit....notice how he makes fun of keanu and yet the star in twilight is really talentless...and he doesn't say anything about it....wow
because the two movies have the same flaws and he chose to gloss over them for Twilight. Transformers has toilet jokes, Twilight has the cheesiest lines. Both target audiences are horny teenagers, only different in gender. Transformers has Megan Fox, New Moon has hunky vampires and warewolves with nicely tuned abs.
I would agree with you but i think his point of view is that hes looking at the target audience. Thats why he keeps saying "it does what it does rather well" and transformers perhaps didn't cater to their audience as well as Twilight did. Of course i enjoyed transformers a lot more but then im not a 16 yo girl
Transformers talks to its target audience just as well, the box office tells you that much, it also launched Megan Fox and Shia Labeouf's career. I'm a girl, I can tell you Twilight is a porn for girls as Transformers are for boys. I think older men think there's something sweet about the sexual longing and fantasy of a girl who's nervous about the actual thing, that's why they don't judge Twilight as harshly. You will also notice those who're most critical of the series are actually women.
Twilight.... lol.. seriously. This movie is made for girls in a way the porn is made for guys. It's not a movie it's more like a emotional porno for lonely girls, ther is no real plot. Ehh...
No it doesn't... srsly ? Lol.. if You personaly like "girl drama movies" then, well ok it's your choice. But you are in drastic minority. For me this picture gets 0 points on 0 to 1000 scale.
@VejlorMorne You would have no idea how much I hated it . You cant imagine how much hate I had. Until I just wanted to watch it with no expectation, just to see it you know, .... I never watch this kind of movies but I tell you this movie still got something,. a lot could be improved, I write stories for hobby ( I dont work in hollywood) heck
As far as films go, its not terrible. Theres some decent cinematography and it knows the target audience well, but when compared to something like Let the Right One In which is a truly beautiful film it doesn't have much to offer its more mature viewers.
The thing is, just because Twilight is very popular with 15 year old teenage girls dos not make a good movie, they basically don't know their arse from their elbow.
Go watch Let the Right Ones In, for a top quality well written and directed vampire film.
@pypeworld That's a pretty sweeping statement about fifteen year-old girls. Did I like the movie? No. But I'm not going to dismiss an entire demographic on that basis, because it's kind of narrow minded and insulting. I was a fifteen year-old girl once, and I wasn't a moron.
@FranBMan Firstly I didn't say "moron" and the main demographic clearly is teenage girls. These so called fans wholeheartedly preach about the franchise being this clever reinvention of vampire mythology, when in fact it's shallow poorly scripted and acted rubbish. Basically if you think these movies are a class act it's idiotic behaviour at any age.
@pypeworld That's not what you said. You said fifteen year-old girls don't know their ass from their elbow. Come on mate, you might as well have said moron. Of course the main demographic is fifteen year-old girls, which is why I can far more readily appreciate their love for the franchise than I can Mark Kermode's.
@FranBMan But I still didn't say "moron" no matter how you try and twist my previous comments about Twlight and it's fan base. I still think it's idiotic to support a franchise with little to no redeeming qualities. Apart from maybe the entertainingly bad semi-naked Native Americans, who then transform into poorly animated CGI werewolves. That alone was worth viewing, only because it was so laughably executed.
@pypeworld Im not a huge Twilight fan however ive seen let teh right one in and i didnt like it, i found it extremely boring. The best vampire movie ever made in my opinion is The Lost Boys, check it out and make sure you dont watch the terrible sequel The Lost Boys The Tribe
@pypeworld I agree with with you, but GROW UP, its TWILIGHT! what do you expect! It's not meant to be on the same level of Right The Right One In! Jeez
This is probably one the cheesiest films I've seen in a while (e.g. the apple scene).
The acting is amateurish at best and the dialogue is complete garbage.
The scene where Edward is sparkling from the sun light makes you just shake your head in complete disgust, but it's not until he utters the words, "I'm a monster" do you find yourself heading to the bathroom to regurgitate the Philly cheese steak sandwich you had the other night.
When I first watched it at the cinema I thought it was actually pretty good - if I'd seen this review before I'd have agreed with everything he said but I watched it for the second time yesterday and it was so SLOW! The two main characters had no personality - Bella was so horrible to everyone and so selfish.
Why did I think it was so good before??
I've agreed all along about the lame special effects though - and the sparkling in the sun thing with the chimes sound effect - embarrassing.
This is why I love Mark Kermode. You honestly never know what to expect from him. The guy calls it like he sees it, and he doesn't feel the need to apologize for enjoying movies that either you or I might think are complete rubbish.
I severerly dislike Twilight (both the book and the movie- take your pick) but I thought his review was great. He gets the target audience, and he gets the appeal. The guy is a riot, and I love listening to his reviews , even the ones I don't agree with.
Possibly of interest to children. Like crayons.
zaroffhound 2 days ago
holy hell, he actually likes twilight and dislikes a lot of actually good movies!? I respect him, but come on!
wowowowowowowowmmkay 1 week ago
@wowowowowowowowmmkay
Name just ONE good film that he dislikes!
terratrema 3 days ago
I'm sorry but this film is terrible. Awful script, piss-poor acting and worst of all, an insufferable sense of self-importance that permeates the entire god-forsaken film.
mayer8356 1 month ago
the thing is, i guess he is viewing it with no outside influences and a kind of un-biased take compared to most of us. i know i don't like it but its also a sin to like it these days.
iGotSpaceLikeNASA 1 month ago
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TankMacnamara81 2 months ago
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TankMacnamara81 2 months ago
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TankMacnamara81 2 months ago
It's alright, it's just the hype that fucks it up.
Filmzie 2 months ago
@Filmzie That and the glittering...
Baktor 2 months ago
3:53
leviterande 2 months ago
I watched this movie the first time just like all other guys thinking that this shit stinks only for small 12 year old girls , man I was so wrong, it was the stupid ass media that fucked it for guys
leviterande 2 months ago
honestly.. twilight isn't a bad film. and I'm a nineteen year old heterosexual lad. I was surprised myself.
imgonnafuckuup1 3 months ago 4
oh how i long for the days when vampires went around biting people on the neck and not whining like a little bitch
violetlover666 4 months ago 8
@eddywards84 I do actually kinda agree that it doesn't deserve ALL the bad press it's got, because now it's just a magnet for hate basically. But I'd still say it was crap and boring, and it's really cheesy. You can't just generalise that all men hate romance and that's why we dislike it, it's just that men aren't affected by the soppy side of it, and it's therefore easy for us to see what a bad movie it is...
MrAzijn 4 months ago
I like how worried Mark looks when Simon calls Linda 'Prof Kermode'... 4:22
kumaraisin 5 months ago
i really is a very good film, it gets such bad mass reviews from males purely i think because of a macho culture, any film with a romance is soppy and rubbish. However, despite the romance this is not all about a romance this is about conflicting hidden worlds, which have effects on any relationship developing, but at the centre of it, is a believable romance, with is driven by character development and an ever moving narrative
eddywards84 5 months ago
@eddywards84 ...except that the characters are totally unbelievable, Edward is borderline abuse, and their is almost zero character development throughout. That's probably why it gets bad reviews. Also, the plots make little sense, and the dialogue is strung together with cliches and poor delivery.
PompamooseMagique 4 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
@eddywards84: "it gets such bad mass reviews from males purely i think because of a macho culture"
Uhm, bollocks. Sure, there certainly are some who derile this movie simply because it's "too girly". But one of the reasons why I hate this movie is *because I'm a feminist*. Twillight is deeply misogynistic and anti-sex.
InnerPartisan 3 months ago
I bet some of the people here who hate on twilight haven't even seen it. Thinking they are cool to dis it.
rundle19938 6 months ago
Why, Kermode?? ...WHY!?!??
bunnygun1 7 months ago 2
Wow, how cool is it to hate Twilight? You guys are intelligent, free thinking people.
MrTeatime 7 months ago
Chronos, near dark.... dont compare this tripe to those great films.
keirarts30 7 months ago
@keirarts30
In all fairness, Near Dark is kind of like Twilight, if Twilight had been directed by Hank III and wasn't completely braindead.
CthuhluRising 6 months ago
I can't believe Mark Kermode didn't slate this film! I used to find Mark Kermode's opinions pretty bang on, even if I didn't agree with them. But his embrace of this film, and his thorough slating of Pineapple Express have made me start to re-evaluate if I can trust this man with my cinematic well being! I will have to see if he has done a review of Paul yet. If he slates that then I don't know ...the future looks rocky. Maybe its because I'm not a 15 year old girl so I just don't get it.
BelatedCommiseration 7 months ago
Kermode has FAILED ME
HillDueceua 7 months ago 18
@HillDueceua He also thought Inception was great film.
djmax2k6 2 months ago
@djmax2k6 that might be because it was...
HillDueceua 2 months ago
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TankMacnamara81 2 months ago
@TankMacnamara81 I wanted him to write off Twilight completely for the box office schlock that it is, not play this devil's advocate crap and throw everyone for a loop just to put himself on the fringes of the movie critic culture.
HillDueceua 2 months ago
@HillDueceua Oh sorry, Duh, excuse me for being a retard. i watched too many reviews yesterday and i think I was the one confused. Sorry again :)
TankMacnamara81 1 month ago
The dialogue in Twilight makes me cringe so badly. I want to scrunch a photo of a kitten or something whenever I hear the mary sue self insert and sore excuse of a vampire talk.
Shadowvixenx 8 months ago
Why does this remind me of the Yogscast? Simon=Simon, Mark=Lewis
Fhuaran 8 months ago
Kermode's love of horror and his interest in theology has been his undoing leading him into this state where Twilight seems good.
allaboutdmagic 8 months ago
He enjoyed this Mormon abstinence porn?
Phlebas99 9 months ago 2
paper recycling only
pellypates 9 months ago
I think you're approaching Kermode's review from the wrong POV - he's mad on genre convention, hence the long discussion of apparent 'inspirations'. It works on the terms it sets out.
Haeronthegreat 9 months ago
Kristen Stewert is the only person I've ever seen with a sexy chin.
batmanofni 10 months ago
Mark, I really think that you are giving this movie's creators too much credit.
They probably weren't going this deep..
MrShadyJeff 10 months ago
''Twshite'', ~enough said =D
ec123456789able 10 months ago
@ec123456789able Agreed man. Agreed. Calling it a piece of shit is an overstatement.
Shadowvixenx 8 months ago
Oh Kermode, Kermode, Kermode. You do try too hard to go against the grain.
There's no denying this film's utter awfulness. The only way I could understand someone of Kermode's knowledge liking it is as one of those "so bad it's good" films that you throw on when a friend comes round.
MrVinushka 10 months ago
Catherine Hardwicke is no Kathryn Bigelow (and not as hot either). Let's not forget Miss Bigelow directed the far more superior vampire classic NEAR DARK. What Catherine needs is my big brown dong, slapping her in the face until she says: "I promise Jace, no more ill-conceived shit attempts at fairytales!" Didn't MK say the Twilight series was better than Star Wars? Shame on him!
jace007 10 months ago
I love Mark Kermode He just gets film and can see the point of both the Twilight movies and Rob Pattinson. The camera just loves him and I think K is hilarious when he describes Edward's first appearance. Too many critics dissed the film because it appeals to girls, yet praise drivel like Independence Day because it has explosions and airplanes. Kermode is the best broadcasting film critic in the British Isles. Honest and brave.
downeyac 10 months ago
The best thing about Kermode is that he (unlike a lot of people posting here) understand the concept of a "genre" film and target audience. Sure, the film doesn't make a profound statement and it's unlikely to appear on any critics' best of lists, but it achieves rather well what it sets out to do, and will undoubtedly appease the audience it was made for. Wish more people could grasp this concept and not assume any film aimed at teenagers is automatically shite.
surprisedbyjoy1804 11 months ago
@surprisedbyjoy1804 At least once a year, Mark Kermode will make one seemingly orchestrated "against the grain" statement or theory to keep up his status as a 'maverick'. For instance: "Johnny Depp ruined Pirates Of The Caribbean", "Daniel Craig is the best Bond ever", "3D will die out" (although I hope this last one's true). I don't really see this as any different. I'm sure he enjoyed the films in a sheepish sort of way, but I'm not buying any justification for it being any more than that.
MrVinushka 10 months ago
OK i am yet to muster strenght to watch this movie......shud i watch this movie guys, keeping in mind that i like movies like se7en....any suggestions
majesticmaniac 11 months ago
So erm, he likes it? WTF!? And he doesn't like Watchmen, or Dark Knight, or The Shining? I watched the whole review waiting for him to say "actually it's crap".
atomicmrpelly 1 year ago
when he says dracul, he reminds me of eddie izzard
wimpylassiter2336 1 year ago
'The first time the camera looks at him the camera almost falls over.'
allaboutdmagic 1 year ago
I'm pretty sure very few twilight fans have ever heard of A Flock of Seagulls =P
cofpaddy 1 year ago
3:46-3:51 spot on.
ec123456789able 1 year ago
"He' s just so fabulous I can barely hold myself together!
...anyway..."
Teenage girls have Twilight, men have Under Siege, etc.
TheCyberToad 1 year ago
@TheCyberToad I'm sorry, men have 'Under Siege'? What the fuck is that?
cofpaddy 1 year ago
@cofpaddy It's a movie. more to the point, it's a Steven Seagal movie.
TheCyberToad 1 year ago
@TheCyberToad
And therefore stretching the definition of 'movie'.
PurushaDesa 1 year ago
@PurushaDesa exactly.
TheCyberToad 1 year ago
"He' s just so fabulous I can barely hold myself together!
...anyway..."
TheCyberToad 1 year ago
Twilight was just average...i couldn't really get into it :¬/ i couldnt get my head round why Bella couldnt just go out with a normal person?! and why cant she cheer the fuck up!
sumbl3b0b 1 year ago
The best Keanu Reeves impression I have ever seen!
thishandisfine 1 year ago
DLACULE!!!!
Gallifrey1991 1 year ago
This man did not like Kill Bill....but he liked Twilight...how is he employed?
eschultz711 1 year ago 2
@eschultz711 he's honest. he had higher expectations for kill bill because he feels emotionally invested in quentin tarantino's career. it's why he's such an interesting critic. you and i disagree with him, but it doesn't make us better critics.
darrylglass5102 1 year ago
@eschultz711 Well, I haven't seen any of the Twilight films; I don't think I'd like them, but I won't cast judgment prematurely. As for Kill Bill, I didn't like it very much.
jwdeming 3 months ago in playlist More videos from kermodeandmayo
Reason why The film is better than the book. Its shorter ;D. The twilight books is possibly the worst book i've read. Also, Why are they In love? They having nothing in common, Nothing that shows its love. I don't have a problem with Vampires being in the sun light, as In past novels they could survive in Light but they became weaker. However if they Sparkle, That annoys me. ;D
JMcauley211 1 year ago
@JMcauley211 Have you heard of opposites attract? Since when did you have to have something in common with someone to fall in love with them?
Love is weird. Its something more than have something in common with them or anything else.
prigg88 7 months ago
Well if you like your males to act more like a girl than you do then twilight is your movie....I agree with those that say it was dull and really had no plot and personally I would rather have to read a dictionary through twice than to read another of Meyers books again.
sframe1978 1 year ago
Near Dark was awesome, especially due to the fact it has Bishop, Vasquez, and Hudson, as well as Nathan Petrelli
deathbunny32 1 year ago
Well it's aimed a teens so teens are gonna like it and lots of older people like it too. I am 25 and love Twilight. If u don't like it fine. But i would like to see u do better.
clemarochies 1 year ago
stop banging the table while on the radio mark
placydil 1 year ago
you get guys with kids who think they have to like these teen soaps.
seen it and it was tedious..sorry if you liked it.
chinahands100 1 year ago
The only vampire film I can tolerate is Blade #1.
soundslave 1 year ago
@soundslave what about lestat?:O
negyms 1 year ago
Near Dark. Good flick. You notice they never say the "V" word? Vampire is never uttered in it. I want more from Bigelow! I've never seen any Twilight films, am I missing much?
QuatermassMan 1 year ago
Wait, what? He liked it? naaahhh.... really? shit.
xeractus 1 year ago
"He's just so fabulous I can hardly hold myself together!" Mark's infrequent camp moments are worth tuning in on their own.
allaboutdmagic 1 year ago 4
this bloke is a fucking cock! he praises the shit that is Twilight to the nth degree but completley scrutinises Quantum of Solace!!! what a cunt!!!
jamesmoscrop007 1 year ago
@jamesmoscrop007 not saying Twilight is good but Quantum of Solace was a bad movie - there was no plot in that movie at all.
prigg88 7 months ago
i'm a teenage girl and twilight is awful IMHO. its frightening how much people like it :/
KristieHerself 1 year ago
"The background - the hard work - I can do and you can join in with the fluff." Quotes like this are the reason I've grown to love Kermode so much. What a badass.
BunionMann 1 year ago
Thies idiots think twilight is a good movie and dont like watchmen.....they should be shot and burned frankly
jack688 1 year ago
@jack688
Twilight doesn't aspire to anything, whereas Watchmen was a violation of a classic work done in a pitiful way.
It's all about context.
Jcolinsol 1 year ago
@Jcolinsol if you need to enjoy something via context, then enjoy your twilight shit and ill enjoy watchmen.
jack688 1 year ago
@jack688
I think you missed my point.
Jcolinsol 1 year ago
its a morrissey movie
yerbibby 1 year ago
Comment removed
deadblissco 1 year ago
I think Kermode is too lenient, he over-compensates his view by assuming the position of the target audience. 'if i were a dumb teenage girl I'd love this.'
There is always an element of this in criticism, but it seems he becomes far too lenient and lost as sense of his own taste.
Twilight, Street Dance 3d? He keeps going on about this terrible films, but keeps beating over your head saying they're not for you, they're not for you.
emperorglenuff 1 year ago
"I have a daughter right in the middle of the target audience."
Get. Her. Out. Of. The. Cult!
Edward is an abusive, controlling creep who sabotages her car, isolates her from her friends, is jealous, makes her lie to her father, treathens her with suicide, doesn't allow her to disagree with her or make personal choises and practically stalks her!
And this is what the author and the fans call True Love. No, it's abuse. Period.
missoujei 1 year ago 48
@missoujei give this user the biggest thumbs up ever. Its so right what u said and screw Twilight. Harry Potter all the way.
TheCSMman 1 year ago
@missoujei It is just a movie and teenagers know that it isn't real and if any teenage girl takes the film literally blame the parents not a movie!
clemarochies 11 months ago
@missoujei That, and also it's a pile of bollocks.
bodieofci5 9 months ago
@missoujei
Lol, "cult".
DontTouchMyVicodin 7 months ago
@missoujei I do agree in some ways but he is trying to protect her. To be fair the only suicide he threatens her with is his own & thats only in response to her death. He does effectively isolate her by not telling her to hang out with people like Jess, Angela, Mike, Eric etc. but he's not doing it deliberately. He's not trying to hurt her, just trying to make her happy.
prigg88 7 months ago
@prigg88 It's still emotional blackmail and has no place in a healthy relationship, deliberate or not. He's not the only asshole in the series, mind you: Bella's father is an absolute dick: "a guy molested you? Hah! Good for him :D" and Jacob is no better than Edward, really. My problem isn't how these characters behave - they're fictional. But the author and the fans call this relationship which manages to pretty much fill the domestic abuse check list true love. And that's disturbing.
missoujei 7 months ago
@missoujei is it really emotional blackmail? How does he blackmail Bella by saying don't die or I'll kill myself. Most people don't want to die at any rate. TBH, its unhealthy in the fact that a human is after a vampire and that if they get intimate, he might accidentally kill her or turn her into a vampire. I agree - none of the characters are great. Bella emotionally blackmails Edward in Eclipse to stay away from the fight.
prigg88 7 months ago
@missoujei Its true love in the sense that they can't live without each other. Whether its a healthy relationship is another thing entirely. At the end of breaking dawn once they're both vamps, I think it is a healthy relationship.
TBH, I think its whats interesting about the story in that what would you do for love? Would you love a vampire? would you become a vampire for him? Would you fall for a werewolf, knowing you don't have to change for him? etc.
prigg88 7 months ago
@missoujei I would say I'm probably on the same side as kermode on this. I love the concept of the story and themes etc. rather than the actual characters etc.
In the books, I think I would fall for Edward but in the movie version, I don't think I would. I doubt I would fall for Jacob in either version.
prigg88 7 months ago
@prigg88 Each to their own, but I can't get over the way the relationships are portrayed in the movies and the books. The themes I find disturbing (abstinence, infantilization of women ect) and frankly I think there are a lot better YA books for girls to read. The positive thing about the franchise is that a female author has received so much publicity with a series of books with a female protagonist, marketed at teenage girls. I just whish it wasn't so poor in quality.
missoujei 7 months ago
@missoujei Spot on.
PompamooseMagique 4 months ago
I really hated Twilight. The books are written with equal sophistication to Mills and Boone and the characters, particularly Damsel in Distress, Bella, are vacuous cyphers. There's no hint of humour, no tongue in cheek, just heavy handed "symbolism" and unsympathetic characters. It really annoys me that great kids books like Harry Potter and shows like Buffy, which was a classic, are tarred with the same brush as stuff like this.
FranBMan 1 year ago
Go Mayo!
metfilmguy2009 1 year ago
you didnt like SATC but you liked Twilight COME ON!!!!!!
Prissy121 1 year ago
I'm just delighted that QI was mentioned.
DontTouchMyVicodin 1 year ago 3
I feel offended as a fan of The Cure that Mark is likening those guys with this piece of shit in any way. Twilight is not worthy. : /
Slawter187 1 year ago
These guys are barmy. This movie was atrocious. It actively fought against having anything interesting happen. Pattinson and Stewart are so drippy, mumbly, crass, and unlikeable I was actively praying we focus on the other characters.
I went to see it with my girl and we both walked out of the theater like we'd been date-raped: tired, confused, angry, and not sure what to take it out on.
JamesOhGoodie 1 year ago
Kermode was not necessarily saying he liked it, just that he thought it did what it was supposed to do well. Which was basically to cash in on teenagers who have a lot of angst and are horny. He was just mentioning he's not part of the intended audience (i.e. teenage girls.) I am however and I can't stand the movie or books.
Enoemen 1 year ago
@Enoemen I think Kermode looks at this too much, he's become like an executive producer critic. Is the FILM good or not, not its business viability!!?
emperorglenuff 1 year ago
i find it puzzling these films are aimed at young girls..
nothing wrong with that but these two banging on about it..odd
SuperColin74 1 year ago
This guy hates watchmen but likes twilight? I'll say it again this guy is a complete douche.
pandemic0barretta 1 year ago 3
@pandemic0barretta Agreed. This guy has terrible taste.
skylinedesigns 1 year ago
@pandemic0barretta It's called opinions, and he's able to back them up.
Transformers217 1 year ago
It bored me senseless and also New Moon which is even worse. It's like watching an episode of Dawson's Creek with Vamps. Kirsten Stewart is truly awful, Pattison just about holds it together. How this tripe ever got greenlit..Cherr Ching!
spacecakess 1 year ago
@spacecakess "New Moon" is awful. Check my page to see my review of it.
Transformers217 1 year ago
I just heard the audio of this film and already disagree with Mark
90mv 1 year ago
im usually with kermode but this was waaaaaaaaay off. twilight was really bad, the acting/direction/script and in general the shallow teen girl fantasy. very irritating film and worse review
belito311 1 year ago 2
Well, you heard what he said about gary oldman in the dark knight? that he was a better actor than heath ledger...and this is from a guy who loved twilight. And I'm not saying gary oldman sucks, but apparently we can't tell who's a better actor or actress in movies...only kermode can
Verrako 2 years ago
What in the world is this guy talking about? First of all the book sucks balls....and the main dude in the movie is horrible....I think kermode won't say what he really thinks about the main dude in the movie it is because the star is a brit....notice how he makes fun of keanu and yet the star in twilight is really talentless...and he doesn't say anything about it....wow
Verrako 2 years ago
yeah, thats what it is, kermode is just so LOYAL to britain that he won't criticise british actors, yes, that sounds very likely.
Bjarku 2 years ago
5:53 "thats a david cronenberg film" - what a tosser lol. couldn't resist it could he
brmanuk 2 years ago
Stand up straight ! look smart! Great LOL
partyhat3 2 years ago
Whoo im relatedd to mark :D x
liss4alex 2 years ago
Go you!
EvilgidgitReturns 2 years ago
I can't believe it; he says Johnny Depp sucks in Pirates of the Caribbean, but he likes TWILIGHT?!?!
c'mon he can't be serious, it's the most terrible acting ever!
queenjoanna01 2 years ago 4
@queenjoanna01
He didn't actually like Twilight. He just didn't want that girl to feel bad.
jktomas 8 months ago
Twilight sucks.
MrsScarletScolex 2 years ago 27
what pissed me off the most about this movie is how they all jerk and spazz when no one talks it's just like what the fuck
nofishhere4 2 years ago
I did not like the Twilight movie much. But, I'd rather sit through that movie than watch New Moon. New Moon was terrible.
Pippland 2 years ago
DRACULA
Sanaa2k 2 years ago
I've lost respect for him.
He likes Twilight? and he called Transformer porn? Hypocrite.
uptilthesky 2 years ago 4
How is he a hypocrite if he likes Twilight. And Michael Bay did make Transformers look like porn.
EvilgidgitReturns 2 years ago
because the two movies have the same flaws and he chose to gloss over them for Twilight. Transformers has toilet jokes, Twilight has the cheesiest lines. Both target audiences are horny teenagers, only different in gender. Transformers has Megan Fox, New Moon has hunky vampires and warewolves with nicely tuned abs.
uptilthesky 2 years ago
Good point.
EvilgidgitReturns 2 years ago
I would agree with you but i think his point of view is that hes looking at the target audience. Thats why he keeps saying "it does what it does rather well" and transformers perhaps didn't cater to their audience as well as Twilight did. Of course i enjoyed transformers a lot more but then im not a 16 yo girl
Sirwastealot 2 years ago
Transformers talks to its target audience just as well, the box office tells you that much, it also launched Megan Fox and Shia Labeouf's career. I'm a girl, I can tell you Twilight is a porn for girls as Transformers are for boys. I think older men think there's something sweet about the sexual longing and fantasy of a girl who's nervous about the actual thing, that's why they don't judge Twilight as harshly. You will also notice those who're most critical of the series are actually women.
uptilthesky 2 years ago
Yeah, they should burst into flames.
EvilgidgitReturns 2 years ago
what are they joking about at 4:20 onwards? something about Prof Kermode?
jer400uk 2 years ago
i fell off my chair at 3:45 - hilarious Keannu impression.
noodoo19 2 years ago 2
Damn! I was expecting a Pirates 3 rant!
samlux2 2 years ago
i walked out of that movie.
lukeyduke434 2 years ago 4
catherine hardwicke should be killed, she blows, thirteen sucked as well
BRm2008 2 years ago
twilight blows.
BRm2008 2 years ago 2
1:28
I haven't seen this movie or read the book, but that line was just hilariously terrible.
Minic15 2 years ago
Twilight.... lol.. seriously. This movie is made for girls in a way the porn is made for guys. It's not a movie it's more like a emotional porno for lonely girls, ther is no real plot. Ehh...
VejlorMorne 2 years ago 12
@VejlorMorne well said but admit that it touches us guys too... not as much but still
leviterande 1 year ago
@leviterande
No it doesn't... srsly ? Lol.. if You personaly like "girl drama movies" then, well ok it's your choice. But you are in drastic minority. For me this picture gets 0 points on 0 to 1000 scale.
VejlorMorne 1 year ago
@VejlorMorne You would have no idea how much I hated it . You cant imagine how much hate I had. Until I just wanted to watch it with no expectation, just to see it you know, .... I never watch this kind of movies but I tell you this movie still got something,. a lot could be improved, I write stories for hobby ( I dont work in hollywood) heck
leviterande 1 year ago
@VejlorMorne but guys LOVE porn...
so why do we get so annoyed at this films massive success (with yes mainlyt girls)??
mowgli123456789 1 year ago
Just becouse the stupid teenagers thinks of it in a erotic way dosen't mean the movie is erotic.
TheKisura 2 years ago
This comment has received too many negative votes show
See this is why he's not a good reviewer, he's biased and it effects his reviews.
...be effing objective Kermode.
Sshelly34213 2 years ago
Affects.
philjc54 2 years ago
ghaa! typo, thanks.
Sshelly34213 2 years ago
Sorry, I was just being an arse.
philjc54 2 years ago
*Typo supposed to be affects.
Sshelly34213 2 years ago
dracul!
randomguy1774 2 years ago 11
@randomguy1774 ja. Dracul.
TheCyberToad 1 year ago
If you want teenage angst read "Catcher in the Rye" >_>
DancingEwok 2 years ago 3
As far as films go, its not terrible. Theres some decent cinematography and it knows the target audience well, but when compared to something like Let the Right One In which is a truly beautiful film it doesn't have much to offer its more mature viewers.
ginkgonk122 2 years ago 2
"Let the Right One In" is flippin' amazing!!!!! Except that cat scene that was insanely weird and I couldn't stop laughing ^_^
DancingEwok 2 years ago 4
The thing is, just because Twilight is very popular with 15 year old teenage girls dos not make a good movie, they basically don't know their arse from their elbow.
Go watch Let the Right Ones In, for a top quality well written and directed vampire film.
pypeworld 2 years ago 47
@pypeworld I agree, "Let The Right One In" is a masterpiece! :)
Transformers217 1 year ago
@pypeworld Quite right, Let the RIght one In is stunningly beautiful
samsunghy 1 year ago 3
@pypeworld That's a pretty sweeping statement about fifteen year-old girls. Did I like the movie? No. But I'm not going to dismiss an entire demographic on that basis, because it's kind of narrow minded and insulting. I was a fifteen year-old girl once, and I wasn't a moron.
FranBMan 1 year ago
@FranBMan Firstly I didn't say "moron" and the main demographic clearly is teenage girls. These so called fans wholeheartedly preach about the franchise being this clever reinvention of vampire mythology, when in fact it's shallow poorly scripted and acted rubbish. Basically if you think these movies are a class act it's idiotic behaviour at any age.
pypeworld 1 year ago
@pypeworld That's not what you said. You said fifteen year-old girls don't know their ass from their elbow. Come on mate, you might as well have said moron. Of course the main demographic is fifteen year-old girls, which is why I can far more readily appreciate their love for the franchise than I can Mark Kermode's.
FranBMan 1 year ago
@FranBMan But I still didn't say "moron" no matter how you try and twist my previous comments about Twlight and it's fan base. I still think it's idiotic to support a franchise with little to no redeeming qualities. Apart from maybe the entertainingly bad semi-naked Native Americans, who then transform into poorly animated CGI werewolves. That alone was worth viewing, only because it was so laughably executed.
pypeworld 1 year ago
@pypeworld in which Mark Kermode himself said was the best movie of 2009
TheCSMman 1 year ago
@pypeworld Im not a huge Twilight fan however ive seen let teh right one in and i didnt like it, i found it extremely boring. The best vampire movie ever made in my opinion is The Lost Boys, check it out and make sure you dont watch the terrible sequel The Lost Boys The Tribe
SamHain1031666 1 year ago
@pypeworld hundred percent agreement!
negyms 1 year ago
@pypeworld Let the Right One In is a fantastic film.
bangkokaaron 1 year ago
@pypeworld I agree with with you, but GROW UP, its TWILIGHT! what do you expect! It's not meant to be on the same level of Right The Right One In! Jeez
themanwholikesducks 1 year ago
According to IMDb, fans approached Cedric Diggory's actor and cut their own necks and asked him to vamp them!
EvilgidgitReturns 2 years ago
Angst! Angst! An good angsty film is a paradox!
EchetusXe 2 years ago
This is probably one the cheesiest films I've seen in a while (e.g. the apple scene).
The acting is amateurish at best and the dialogue is complete garbage.
The scene where Edward is sparkling from the sun light makes you just shake your head in complete disgust, but it's not until he utters the words, "I'm a monster" do you find yourself heading to the bathroom to regurgitate the Philly cheese steak sandwich you had the other night.
charvelgtrs 2 years ago 7
When I first watched it at the cinema I thought it was actually pretty good - if I'd seen this review before I'd have agreed with everything he said but I watched it for the second time yesterday and it was so SLOW! The two main characters had no personality - Bella was so horrible to everyone and so selfish.
Why did I think it was so good before??
I've agreed all along about the lame special effects though - and the sparkling in the sun thing with the chimes sound effect - embarrassing.
cordeliaistheone 2 years ago 4
This is why I love Mark Kermode. You honestly never know what to expect from him. The guy calls it like he sees it, and he doesn't feel the need to apologize for enjoying movies that either you or I might think are complete rubbish.
I severerly dislike Twilight (both the book and the movie- take your pick) but I thought his review was great. He gets the target audience, and he gets the appeal. The guy is a riot, and I love listening to his reviews , even the ones I don't agree with.
vampirechunks 2 years ago 8
Wow, like others here I'm a little staggered that Kermode could be so positive about _Twilight_.
swanstep 2 years ago 8
ye