Fuck dat shit. Dump that ass ho. I had the exact same situation happen to me and when I called him out on it he couldnt say nothin except pitch a bitch fit cuz his ass got caught.
i feel he must be guilty of something for him to immediately respond in defense of him messing around just because u asked him about his profile. It makes me feel that maybe that's what he was using the profile for. I say leave him alone.
Xem you make your case known on this ..but not clearly....Yes the dude was probably trying to have his cake and eat it too (which most of us do) but I think the downfall for you is that you shouldnt have kept on "doing things" with him meaning spending time with him etc for i.e. making sure that you went shopping together for his house and doing those personal things like i.e making a list for him of what he should buy..those things you did give notice that you want something more serious..
He was trying to be a player plain and simple. Why be secretive when you gave him the green light to see other people because he was too needy? He simply couldve just said he's in an open relationship. He was trying to get serious with u and his next piece of trade. My ex did the same thing but I was TOO BLINDED by love to see the signs. I had to find out on our anniversary that I WAS THE MISTRESS OF TWO YEARS (HE GOT MARRIED ON OUR ANNIVERSARY!!! WTF!!) thinking he was being faithful to me
Xem...you overacted on this one. In your video, you never detail any confirmation that he actually hooked up with anyone. Moreover, you clarified that you both weren't exclusive with each other. BGC is like all the other sites & phone apps for M4M - all encompassing of anything one could be looking for online. Being discreet isn't synonymous with being sneaky. Provided that you two weren't exclusive; his request not to feature pics of you two may have simply been a measure to deter others from
You were right in feeling what you were feeling. Just because you said your relationship was "open", doesn't mean that he could do whatever, whenever, and not have to be responsible for his actions, words, and deeds. I dated my ex for 10 years, and he cheated quite a bit a found out. Wrong is wrong. To the left, and keep it moving! next! lol
HE'S WRONG FOR KEEPIN IT FROM U BUT AT THE SAME TIME U TOLD HIM HE CAN SEE OTHER PEOPLE SO WHY R U SO ANGRY THAT HE'S ON....IT HAS ITS UPSIDE AND DOWNSIDE. HE WRONG FOR KEEPIN IT FROM U AND U FINDING OUT BUT HE NOT ALL THAT WRONG IF HE CHOSE TO TALK TO OTHERS AND U TOLD HIM UR NOT READY FOR THE RELATIONSHIP. HIM NOT WANTING TO TALK ABOUT MAY HAVE BEEN WRONG AS WELL BUT I DONT THINK HE REALLY DID SOMETHING TRAGIC AFTER THE PART WHEN U SAYD U TOLD HIM HE CAN SEE OTHERS. THATS WHEN IT ALL SWITCHED
This is too cute, you seem like a really nice guy. I hope you find someone who will be loyal to you. I've been where you are, and he got the EXIT door. Congrats to you.
YOU SHOULDNT HAVE TOLD HIM HE COULD DATE OTHER MEN...DUH THATS WHY HE DO WHAT HE DO ...COME ON NOW HE 'S A MAN AND YOU NEVER TELL A GUY THAT HE CAN DATE OTHER PPLE GAY OR STRAIGHT...THATS JUST LIKE TELLING A MARRIED MAN WHEN HE GETS MARRIED IT DONT MEAN HE'S TIED DOWN ...AND THAT ITS OK FOR HIM TO HAVE GROUPIES
Much respect man. I'm just curious. Can you see where you may have contributed to him feeling comfortable in maintaining this BGC acct? Any one who dates me knows that if you are doing something of that nature, I will find out., and it won't be good. Did you ask as many questions as you could throughout the relationship? One more thing. One should only do the things that they want to do. That way they don't have regrets about what they have contributed to the relationship. I wish you love.
I DONT LIKE BGC, EXPECIALLY WHEN IM IN A RELATIONSHIP IF MY PARTNER HAS ONE. I'D NEVER DISRESPECT MY PARTNER BY HAVING A BGC. AND I AGREE BGC IS PRETTY MUCH A HOOKUP SITE. EVERYONE (90%) OF PEOPLE LOOK FOR HOOKUPS / SEX. BUT THATS NOT GOOD THAT HE DID THAT. "REALLY BITCH !" LOL , I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL !!
Hello XemVanAdams, sounds like a couple of 'control freaks'. One wants to control the other. These kinds of relationships NEVER work. 'Self-Control' is the key. But, 'Tiger' is a manipulating person, he's made it perfectly clear what kind of person he is, first time shame on him, second time, 'Shame on You'. I've learned to choose a partner based on 'integrity and morals', and it takes atleast 2 years to truly know what a person is really about, especially if he's still learning life hiself.
BGClive is a social network for BLACK gay men and women with 'Forums' Health Info' 'Short stories segment for inspiring Gay writers', and 'Blog'. BGC does not discriminate against users who choose to use the site for sexual promiscuity. 'Myspace' and 'Facebook', are not sex sites but, the same people are on there with they shit hanging out. Men are sexual creatures not matter what invironment they're in. That's not BGC's fault.
So do you expect him to do, i mean HONESTLY, in my OPINION i think that if its not that serious, then dont take it that serious untill BOTH of you decide to be serious, BGC is for hook-ups and im sure it dont matter since you NOT his boifreind- i mean im sure he gotta nut someway somehow
sorry didnt want to sound so rude, but lets be honest, we are MEN, and i personally believe that if I dont have a boifreind then i dont have no worries about what i do sexually, but untill i DO...............
xem,if he is going out with you then he shouldnt be on the site to start with,if he had the pics up b4 he met u then its not his fualt but he should hav told u upfront b4 ye guys became anything of a couple that he had pics on this site,
So? BGC is about more than that, and you are overreacting...the forums on BGC are legendary, where black gay men chat and read and throw shade to each other...let it go honey...
well said... most kats that are up on any site str8 or gay; "they mainly don't want a picture posted and with good reason... I can understand that" Even on Facebook." However, many are using job, school, etc as an escape goat. No so, because I say "if you can go 3soming with your face shown in sex parties and orgies. Then what is the issue?" No different. People are going to see u, talk about it, and god forbid if you taken; tell your other half. I say, "NO PIC? NO TALK" also no RESTRICTED #'s
well said... most kats that are up on any site str8 or gay; "they mainly don't want a picture posted and with good reason... I can understand that" Even on Facebook." However, many are using job, school, etc as an escape goat. No so, because I say "if you can go 3soming with your face shown in sex parties and orgies. Then what is the issue?" No different. People are going to see u, talk about it, and god forbid if you taken; tell your other half. I say, "NO PIC? NO TALK" also no RESTRICTED #'s
I'm watching ur vids n u r so cute. I wish I can find sum1who is as intelligent as you with your ways of expressing your heart, mind, n soul. I enjoy ur vids. Huggiez!
Your boy was wrong to hide his dating from you but you were wrong too. You sound like those guys that are so busy trying to get somewhere that they can't devote real time to a relationship. He was baggage, knew it and lived his life like it. Get some friends and a few pieces to lay with when you feel the need. You invited him to live the lie with you. Breaking him off some charity time is not a relationship. His needs sound small coming from you.
im sorry but i have to agree with lbnmiami because xem can't tell the guy that he can date other ppl if he wants but when he actually does it xem gets mad about it!dont say something you don't mean!thats just how i feel!!!!!toodles!!!:-)
@stormsinger20 But, my point is that homeboy told xem that he wanted to be with him and told him he loved him. If he didn't do that, I'd agree with you but since Tiger did that, I'm with Xem.
honestly, there isn't much to say because i only heard one side of the story. what i will address is when you said "he can date other people" because you cannot devote enough time to spend with him, and that you weren't ready for a relationship. maybe your lack of time with him and/or your decision on dating other people may have caused him to go in another direction. evaluate yourself first before pointing fingers. there is more i want to say, but i can't because i am going over the word count.
@lbnmiami I disagree. like he said, he didn't want Xem to put up pics. Then, Xem said he was telling Xem that he wanted him and wanted a relationship and that he loved him. Then pull this crap. Um . . .That means that he's (Tiger) is full of crap. If you are gonna say that you love someone and want that person to be in a relationship, then don't be going to look for some behind shortly after the person you said you want to be with leaves. Yes there are two sides but he said he loved Xem. Oh NO!
I'm sorry I knew this isn't funny but evey time you talk about that pic did you have to say locks blowing in the wind....I couldn't stop laughing lol anyway.......I would leave him alone listen to your gut.
man im sorry to tell u but ur man is cheatin and good u lettin him go. i went thro somethin similar w/ my fem gf so juz let him go...dont be like me and fall in love w/ them and end up hurt in the end
being on bgc is different from being on youtube, i think.. everyone watches youtube and only gay ppl for the most part uses bgc.. and u did say he could date other ppl.. so idk
Well...first I do want to acknowledge that I do FULLY understand your frustration and pain. However, you did express giving him permission to date other men. I'm curious to know what are you really mad about? Was your ego hurt that he was BGC or feeling hurt that he may not have wanted to be seen in pics with you? Did he actually step out of the parameters of the relationships; which you've stated he was not your boyfriend! I seem to have been capture by your vids and haven't been to sleep. Thx
i found my 'friends' bgc. and its CRAZY that he has one because he SWEARS he is so "dl" and he wants to play this role like i'm the only guy he's ever been with. And its not just a regular ole' profile. NO! He's alternates between half and fully naked shots of himself...like...WTF? I feel you in this video Xem.
Some people need love to fill huge holes in their hearts that 1 person can't give, but that is no excuse to do something like that when 1 minute he says be with me and then as soon as your back is turned he's online. That is why alot of gay people(including me) have trust issues
THAT MOTHERFUCKER...Folk I fell you the whole way. dont change your mind not one second. Like you said if the dude can take picture the the damn water,but dont want one with you. HE was still looking for ASS. trust me you aint the first and want be the last. Keep it moving..and if you want I dont have a police record so we can key the car, sugar in tank, etc. I got bail money and a house to put on it. lol
All I can think is he's bitter that you did not commit to being in a relationship with him. Also, most likely he didn't want you posting his pics because even though he's single he'd be percieved by many as not available. My lil sis does the same thing the same scenario happened with her even worse the guy paid for all of her stuff.
I feel your pain. I don't blame you for your anger. You have a valid point. I don't think you should brake up with him, but don't be played for a fool. Never ignore the writing on the wall. I hope he understands that you have lost trust in him.
Clearly you were wrong until he lied and that just cannot be pushed aside. Lesson learned and know it is time to move on. (My smart friend i don't know)
Well, at first I thought you had the right to be as moved as you were on the video as a result of your f*ck buddy having an account on bgc. I dont understand why you are so pissed when you guys didn't have anything serious going on, I mean, If im with someone for 9 months, and he tells me he is not ready for a relationship and that I can date other guys, then It means that I have the right to date guys. it was well understood between the two. whether i meet him at a club or a site - it was discu
OMG Xem this is a mess!!!!!!!!!!! I cannot believe you wasted all that time on this loser!!!!!! I have no idea how this dude could do this and then to try and lie about it after you CLEARLY knew was just foolish!!!!!! Welp I guess another one bites the dust Xemmy Bear Keep hope alive
(hilarious) Xem, you goin madd hawerd on this video. Tiger, Tiger Woods, how ironic. Love it mayne! I'll say this to you, don't ever let anyone get in the way of your focus. Him wanting all your attention and time only makes it clear that he is a selfish hearted person. That would explain why he had the BGC profile. He is too selfish and an attention whore. When he can't get yours he seeks attention from other people. He will unfortunatly always be that way. He is scared of lonely.
What i can say is one you wrong for asking him in such a public place two you made it clear to him you not his man and not ready to be. you clownsed on the page saying discreet but thats better than sayin fuckin. you told him date other men and thats what he did but you cant chastize him for doin it in a was you dont find to be right. now he was a lil shady for getting online as soon as u left but i cant blame him what was he suppose to do sit and day dream about a man who dosent want 2 commit?
Xem My ex had a problem with me having a profile, and we had a lot of disputes about the page. Honestly I only log on to the site just to chat, and look at photos. I've only meet one 2 dudes off the site and one of them was him before he deleted his profile, and I've only givin my number out to a hand full of dudes on there. I don't see him having a profile on there as a reason to end what ever you two have going on together. You said he can date other people so what the real issue?
you said he was free to date other people....that site could have been a way for him to do that...that's why I can only be with one person where we ONLY dating each other!
Xemy bear Come down, calm down!! take a breath-er.... things happen for reason. this just mean, dispite your success and all, you're destine for more.
One thing I will say that bothered me, was when u said he said "you put everything b4 me", u might want 2 examine if he's boyfriend material, bcause that may b a sign of jealousy on his part. u need someone who supports u fully, who is just as career driven & focused on their goals as u r. I definitely don't see u as an inconsiderate person towards luv ones, so mos def "red flag" 4 u Xem.....
NEVER MAKE SOMEONE A PRIORITY, WHO ONLY THINKS OF YOU AS AN OPTION!!
I feel ya, Once something major like that happens, its hard to forgive that person because your trust has been betrayed. I recently been through the same thing. But the other person feels that since they didnt officailly cheat, its ok. But its not okay and it want be the same so i had to get out of the relationship.
i lke how ur wearing a single shirt. if your not his boyfriend and u said he could see other people he should be allowed to have his profile on that site. if u didn't ask he didn't have to tell u. he may have not wanted u to post his pics but he if free to fo so. yall need to talk and see where yall are cause yall ain't on the same page tight now.
Also... I think you vented very responsibly and i also think that if anyone who is afraid to step you after seeing this is only afraid becaue they KNOW they do shady shit and know that it wouldnt fly with you. A good guy wouldnt be intimidated by this!
i totally agree with your thoughts on the matter! Even though some of the comments i have read are hating on u for putting it out there on youtube. I dont feel the same way you didnt disclose his name and could be talking about a plethora of other men. Only you, him and maybe ur close friends would know to whom you are referring to.
Wow... that was very dramatic. I think many good prospective partners would be extremely gun shy of approaching you if they percieve that you have the inclination to use your platform to air out relationship issues. I recommend that you reserve the most sensitive details of your relatioinships private. I think that the happiest celebrity relationships are the ones that maintain a normal level of privacy. Peace.
I understand why you're upset, but should have been more clear. If ok to date, he may think it's okay to have an online dating profile.
As far as not wanting his pictures posted, I completly understand. Maybe he does not want all of Facebook and Youtube knowing his every move, what he had for dinner, when he went shopping etc., etc. Not everyone wants every detail of their life documented like you.
Okay i love u down, but u seem a lil selfish on this one...HEs NOT YA MAN!!! Second arent you the same person who just blogged about seeing a cute spanish dude in the store and u were tryin to give him the "eye"!! Come on you dont wanna be his man, but u want him to act like u r wit u with all it comes with!!
NO MAM MISS PAM!! I feel he didnt come out an say yes i have ah bgc profile b/c most guys when they wanna be known as "discreet" or im a "good" guy feel ashamed to have a bgc profile. But from ah needy person (me) you feel like i like this person or i love this person and im not gettin all the attention i need or want so when not get it online knowinh im never gonna really do anythig with someone online.
I was with you until you said that the two of you weren't official. If he had permission to date around as you said then I can find nothing wrong with what he did.
I hope you read this cause i might have a reason as to why he has that profile. I think one of the main reasons why he has it is because like u stated u werent showing him the attention he needed so he would go on to that profile where he prob got LOTS of attention from other people something you werent giving him enough of. I think u should sit down with him and not try to blow it out of proportion because nothing gets resolved in arguments which i bet you prob know. Love you Xem:)
xemmy im just went thru sumthin just like dat...he kept sayin he was gonna put my pics on but never did come to find out it he has 3 other bfs....im sure der were more but those were da only ones i found out by......niggas aint bout shit dez days...keep ur eyes on da prizes....
Xemmy, you have come too far in your life and in the beginning stages of your career to deal with a man who is too afraid to be publicly seen with you. Im quite sure he knew who you were when the two of you met. Dating someone of your caliber comes with certain expectations. If he needs to find his comfort in BGC or any other forum in order to feel secure with your public awareness, then so be it. However, men like you need to be with others who dont rely upon such empty means of comfort.
lol papi i think he dont want to get caught up with the whole no photo deal i mean if it was me i would only want to post one pic u know? just so people know im in yo life so he playing u papi like a game of monopoly
Xemie! You guys were not in a relationship!!!! I don't know the complete situation but I still think you like this dude and for some reason, I feel he still cares for you. Express your feellings to this dude the same way you told all of us! Xemie. . . Don't give up on this dude. Tell him your feelings! You clearly care about this dude. You wouldn't have posted this video if you didn't care. Friendships and relationship take WORK. GIVE that dude a call! Love ya Xemie!!!!
Ugh, wow your making me hate black gay men all the more, lol. i have this love hate relaionship with black gay bois, but I know its negative to say black gay men cant be trusted. Ill just say PEOPLE will be people. Keep it up, ur not the only one struggling with these bois
This appears to have very little to do with him, and much more to do with you. Sometimes we need to step back and look at our own behaviors and reactions to situations. It doesn't sound like he did much wrong at all except not be what you wanted him to be. Thanks for sharing your personal experience with us, but shouldn't you be discussing this with him?
#1. You were not boyfriends according to you. #2Unless stipulated according to you agreed upon arrangement you were each free to use any resources to see other people. 3# Tiger did not break the rule of not having photos of both of you on any of one of your sites because he has pictures of himself in whatever attire. Mr. Adams your rant is "much to do about nothing!"
The other issue regarding him not wanting pics of you & him public, there's a huge difference between placing your profile on a social network site amongst many john does & being in photos as the partner of someone who is in the media spot light, bcause that person is now crittiqued as Xem's partner, which is not comfortable 4 everyne, so you really can't compare the 2.
If he didnt wont yall picture together on your profile then that his right.... you two were not in a relationship all you can do is respect that..... 2nd why are you invested realatinonship time into somethin that not a relationship...3rd do you think that deep down you might be a lol jealous becuz you feel you can be replace... cuz at the end of the day he owes you nuttin at all if yall are not together
I, of course don't know anyone, so I'm just giving my 2 cents, but it seems he didn't want you to post any pics of the two of you, so it would be easier for him to appear single and free on his BGC profile.
Granted, you apparently said it was cool to date others, but there still is a right and wrong way to go about anything. If he was professing all these deeper feelings for you, and acting hurt when you couldn't be with him, how is he having a hookup page? He's "Tiger" in many ways, huh?
you DID tell him that he could date though....and on the other hand when you asked him about his profile, he wasnt up front with you, so on that end he's playing games.
hmm it dodent look good that xem is puting the dude on blast about the time he spent with him holiday weekend. good times are timeless and unchanging BGC profile are not.About the profile pics no 1 can link him to Xem from those pics put if Xem posted pics of him theconnected can be made. I used a dating website while i was in a relationship it didnt mean anything.. its a good way to meet people., dont mean those people will get between the relationship
let me start off by saying you betta werk.... i agree with you even though you didnt ask its still something he should have brought up....you are the oprah for gay men i just love you soo much lol continue your journey and i wish you the best of luck
Xem you got an empire to build..better to find out now than later when you have all these deals going and had the kids..DROP HIM!!! Its messed up that you poured so much energy into him and he couldn't give you the respect you deserve.
There will be a good man in the future but for now, GET YOURS!!!
WOW!!!! That dude is giving Cancers a bad name. Yes, we are real needy of attention and affection. Yes, we want to be #1 in your life...but, when he said he wanted to be with you and you said that you didn't have time for a relationship, he should have accepted that because he still chose to work wit you. However, if you have giving him the option to date, he should have been man enough to let you know before you found out anything that he was on BGC "like that".
If a guy says he wants to be with u but he doesn't want to be seen in public pictures with u how would u take that? Then discover he has his own public pictures on a hookup site....u all wouldn't be perplexed a little by that? That is what Xem is saying. Why can he be seen so publicly on a hookup site but can't be seen in public pictures with Xem yet he wants to be with Xem? Soon as he met someone else he might have just dropped Xem without a word.
LMAO. wait yall see that pause at the end, then he had to stop and do his thanku's lol. Its ok young man. If yall wasn't in an official relationship then maybe he thought he was INDEED SINGLE and could do what he wanted until u said otherwise. But if he wouldn't even tell you about the page if asked..........well all he had to say was "well I'm still single" lol. o well..live and learn
I can see why u are upset junior. If you discover that the person you are in a relationship with has an A4A or BGC profile, which is not social networking but hookup sites, and they make no mention of the truth of their relationship status and are logged on it then something is up. Yes it is........that is why nowadays men flip out over that because we know what those sites are for. If you see they are logged on then they are looking for something without u included.
i agree... "discreet" means "i'm married/boo'd up and want to keep this on the DL." while i agree w/ those that are saying you can't have your cake and eat it, too, i would also say that him lying about it lets YOU know that he was in fact being a sneaky bitch. i mean, if it's not that serious, then why lie? all he had to do is remind you that you didn't want to be exclusive: feelings may have been hurt, but it would've healed. lies just cause distrust which is MUCH harder to heal. eff him.
there is nothing wrong with your boyfriend having a bgc account,i dnt see nothing wrong with it,cuz if i was in a relationship i will still be keeping my social networks including bgc,.i can tell that u love him,forgive him
Yea but most of the time folk who keep them up don't let folk know they are in a relationship now and still hook up from that site and a4a. so naturally people who discover they still have an active profile freak out. BGC and a4a are not social networking sites...they are sex hookup sites! Its not facebook and myspace
yeah thats right,u can say some temptation is involve,cuz lets face it,we all got a list and your present bf may not have all the qualities u want and then there is the cheat who may have a missing quality that you crave,so hence you cheat,damn i wish i was in a relationship,i want to feel how its feels,
im 26 and have never been in a relationship. i feel its no point. cause someone is going to cheat instead of communicating. i can do bad all by myself instead
me too i am the same age,but then again aftr awhile u r gonna feel lonely,when u hear your frens talking abt their bf,u r gonna be jealous,i am jealous of my fren he got a man and i dnt
Some of you are so simple minded and didnt listen to a word our Xemmy said. Ive watched the video 3 times now. He clearly states that he didnt mind the guy being on BGC. He said he has a problem with the fact that the guy posted his photos all over the site and didnt feel comfortable with Xemmy sharing the photos with us because of his online popularity. Furthermore, who goes onto BGC if they arent looking for sex? He wont find a dude of Xemmy's caliber or anyone similar on there. Its garbage!
That is exactly the moral of the story. Xem said the guy wanted a relationship and xem didnt. But he couldn't put pictures of them together no where yet he got pics of himself on a hookup site. Clearly he didn't want to people to see them together in case he met someone else and would have probably made xem an after thought right then and there
Its not simple minded to think that way because clearly u can see that this is deeper than just posting pics!!!! Xem gagged when he found out that the person he maybe in love with was entertaining other me!!!! The pics on a page are just an argueing point!! Xem if u love him and u want him make it clear to him, cause if u loose him it will hurt more!!!
My take if you told him he could date and you were not ready, then he really hasn't done anything wrong. You gave him permision to date others so whats the prob.
It seems there was a lack or total failure of communication between both parties. I found it to be mind boggling as you put it that he would constantly try to make you to be "his" all talk? If he truly wanted to spend his life with you and all of this he would have been forthcomming. I went through a similar situation and had to cut that person loose for similar antics.
You are complete right about that discrete bs. If there is nothing to hide there is no reason to lie.
thats not what the problem is. Why is it that guy can have his picture all over BGC for everyone to see, but if Xem wanted to put pics of them together on his facebook or on here he wouldn't let him? Thats what the point of the video is. "I can't show us together in photos but u can have a hookup account for all the world to see?". he didn't want people to think they were together and soon as something else came along Xem probably wouldn't hear from him at all
I do not know the full story haven't heard both side but what I can conclude from this is you should let him know what you know show him the proof and just have a fully open conversation about as much as possible and that's only if you feel as if he is worth spending that time ! ~Kei
Like my mother use to say a snake won't bite you unless you step on it. There is a snake in your environment. LET GO GET OUT NOW!! DON'T WAIT DON'T WALK RUN. IF it look like a duck. kwack like a duck, it is a duck.
I am sorry, but u really just need 2 move on... U r waaay 2 smart, talented, and good-looking 2 b worried about a total asshole... Honestly if I were u, i would b posting this blog from inside a jail cell. Ignorance is my kill-switch and after that medley of ignorance had spewn from his mouth and to my ears, i would have Beat his ass untill I lost conciouseness... But u b strong and u'll find a better man real soon. Hell i jus might take a swing at yo fine ass- lol
Xem, you were done wrong and u don't desevre that. Yes, given he was not in a relationship with this person. However, this person gave him hope under false pretenses. Don't say I don't want you posting pics of me or of us together because you are a public figure and then go behind his back and be on BGC and have pics of himself all over his profile. Then don't lie when you get confront about. Just be honest. So Xem, you feelings are valid.
Girl STFU!! That voice of yours is annoying! I don't blame him for going to look for another guy.
sirdogg2006 3 days ago
Fuck dat shit. Dump that ass ho. I had the exact same situation happen to me and when I called him out on it he couldnt say nothin except pitch a bitch fit cuz his ass got caught.
fidalgo1987 2 weeks ago
You are so cute! loved you talking about him being horrible with money and you helping him stay on track with a list LOL
Sorry your man turned out to be a DOG!
I wish I were a gay male..I would date ya! hehe
CuckingFracked2 1 month ago
Chile..
Xem DUST him.
He's silly and young. YOU cannot make sense outta nonsense
GlamourGirlMejor30 3 months ago
i feel he must be guilty of something for him to immediately respond in defense of him messing around just because u asked him about his profile. It makes me feel that maybe that's what he was using the profile for. I say leave him alone.
mydreamz8809 3 months ago
I feel u omg i luv your vids
mydreamz8809 3 months ago
LOL at 6:50 "Really Bitch Discreet" Xem be going in. Get Em.
gogetta411 4 months ago
Xem you make your case known on this ..but not clearly....Yes the dude was probably trying to have his cake and eat it too (which most of us do) but I think the downfall for you is that you shouldnt have kept on "doing things" with him meaning spending time with him etc for i.e. making sure that you went shopping together for his house and doing those personal things like i.e making a list for him of what he should buy..those things you did give notice that you want something more serious..
Nkeraged 6 months ago
8-9 months
mchou2002 7 months ago
I feel you on this one Xem dudes play alot of games yo ALOT of games.
Blessed21484 7 months ago
He was trying to be a player plain and simple. Why be secretive when you gave him the green light to see other people because he was too needy? He simply couldve just said he's in an open relationship. He was trying to get serious with u and his next piece of trade. My ex did the same thing but I was TOO BLINDED by love to see the signs. I had to find out on our anniversary that I WAS THE MISTRESS OF TWO YEARS (HE GOT MARRIED ON OUR ANNIVERSARY!!! WTF!!) thinking he was being faithful to me
gymnasttranny 8 months ago
LOL, lawd, I can't.
dellculookin 8 months ago
Xem...you overacted on this one. In your video, you never detail any confirmation that he actually hooked up with anyone. Moreover, you clarified that you both weren't exclusive with each other. BGC is like all the other sites & phone apps for M4M - all encompassing of anything one could be looking for online. Being discreet isn't synonymous with being sneaky. Provided that you two weren't exclusive; his request not to feature pics of you two may have simply been a measure to deter others from
NrthDall81 9 months ago
Chile..... Thats some drama.
richboy88 9 months ago
You were right in feeling what you were feeling. Just because you said your relationship was "open", doesn't mean that he could do whatever, whenever, and not have to be responsible for his actions, words, and deeds. I dated my ex for 10 years, and he cheated quite a bit a found out. Wrong is wrong. To the left, and keep it moving! next! lol
firepoidancer67 10 months ago
There is none, be done, you owe him no second chances, you just were dating, on to the next, be happy you dodged that bullet
apictureofruit 10 months ago
HE'S WRONG FOR KEEPIN IT FROM U BUT AT THE SAME TIME U TOLD HIM HE CAN SEE OTHER PEOPLE SO WHY R U SO ANGRY THAT HE'S ON....IT HAS ITS UPSIDE AND DOWNSIDE. HE WRONG FOR KEEPIN IT FROM U AND U FINDING OUT BUT HE NOT ALL THAT WRONG IF HE CHOSE TO TALK TO OTHERS AND U TOLD HIM UR NOT READY FOR THE RELATIONSHIP. HIM NOT WANTING TO TALK ABOUT MAY HAVE BEEN WRONG AS WELL BUT I DONT THINK HE REALLY DID SOMETHING TRAGIC AFTER THE PART WHEN U SAYD U TOLD HIM HE CAN SEE OTHERS. THATS WHEN IT ALL SWITCHED
ballerprince 11 months ago
This is too cute, you seem like a really nice guy. I hope you find someone who will be loyal to you. I've been where you are, and he got the EXIT door. Congrats to you.
metamorphosis4u 11 months ago
YOU SHOULDNT HAVE TOLD HIM HE COULD DATE OTHER MEN...DUH THATS WHY HE DO WHAT HE DO ...COME ON NOW HE 'S A MAN AND YOU NEVER TELL A GUY THAT HE CAN DATE OTHER PPLE GAY OR STRAIGHT...THATS JUST LIKE TELLING A MARRIED MAN WHEN HE GETS MARRIED IT DONT MEAN HE'S TIED DOWN ...AND THAT ITS OK FOR HIM TO HAVE GROUPIES
gottalovemystyle 1 year ago
LOVE THE FACT THAT UR WEARIN A SINGLE SHIRT!
eastsidesfynest 1 year ago
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MY MAN SAID LOCKS BLOWIN IN THE WIND .LOL. SOUNDS HOT !!! TIGER !!! GRRR
leonnoel 1 year ago
MY MAN SAID LOCKS BLOWIN IN THE WIND ??? SOUNDS HOT !!! TIGER !!! GRRR
leonnoel 1 year ago
Much respect man. I'm just curious. Can you see where you may have contributed to him feeling comfortable in maintaining this BGC acct? Any one who dates me knows that if you are doing something of that nature, I will find out., and it won't be good. Did you ask as many questions as you could throughout the relationship? One more thing. One should only do the things that they want to do. That way they don't have regrets about what they have contributed to the relationship. I wish you love.
JOEBLACK36 1 year ago
OOH!! YOU SOUND MAD.LOL!!
aRtIfIcIAl20 1 year ago
lmaooo Discreet! "Really BITCH Discreet?!" too funny
ShawtyFyne1 1 year ago 2
I DONT LIKE BGC, EXPECIALLY WHEN IM IN A RELATIONSHIP IF MY PARTNER HAS ONE. I'D NEVER DISRESPECT MY PARTNER BY HAVING A BGC. AND I AGREE BGC IS PRETTY MUCH A HOOKUP SITE. EVERYONE (90%) OF PEOPLE LOOK FOR HOOKUPS / SEX. BUT THATS NOT GOOD THAT HE DID THAT. "REALLY BITCH !" LOL , I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL !!
MrBeyonceFan 1 year ago
All that need to be said is CHILD BOO!!!! Xem what a lesson learned..... That was fucked up though
chokemedown 1 year ago
Its that what happen when not given the enough company to the special one?
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bethaprivttee 1 year ago
HE WAS A WHORE ..ITS JUST THAT SIMPLE...YOU DESERVE BETTER
u1abme2 1 year ago
"tiger how ironic" lol
siobhanmcfevify 1 year ago
Im just now viewing this video and i know its old...good topic tho, but considering how old this is, I'll save my view point.
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GerryOlympia 1 year ago
Hello XemVanAdams, sounds like a couple of 'control freaks'. One wants to control the other. These kinds of relationships NEVER work. 'Self-Control' is the key. But, 'Tiger' is a manipulating person, he's made it perfectly clear what kind of person he is, first time shame on him, second time, 'Shame on You'. I've learned to choose a partner based on 'integrity and morals', and it takes atleast 2 years to truly know what a person is really about, especially if he's still learning life hiself.
PatreqHolmz 1 year ago
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BGClive is a social network for BLACK gay men and women with 'Forums' Health Info' 'Short stories segment for inspiring Gay writers', and 'Blog'. BGC does not discriminate against users who choose to use the site for sexual promiscuity. 'Myspace' and 'Facebook', are not sex sites but, the same people are on there with they shit hanging out. Men are sexual creatures not matter what invironment they're in. That's not BGC's fault.
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dxrdrrddrffr 1 year ago
So do you expect him to do, i mean HONESTLY, in my OPINION i think that if its not that serious, then dont take it that serious untill BOTH of you decide to be serious, BGC is for hook-ups and im sure it dont matter since you NOT his boifreind- i mean im sure he gotta nut someway somehow
sorry didnt want to sound so rude, but lets be honest, we are MEN, and i personally believe that if I dont have a boifreind then i dont have no worries about what i do sexually, but untill i DO...............
cambokidd215 1 year ago
Having a BGC doesn't mean one is looking for a date or sex. I know plenty of girls who just hang in the forums.
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rassednwortan 1 year ago
LoL...
rtisleo 1 year ago
xem,if he is going out with you then he shouldnt be on the site to start with,if he had the pics up b4 he met u then its not his fualt but he should hav told u upfront b4 ye guys became anything of a couple that he had pics on this site,
yaddapnervad 1 year ago
sounding like WHOOPI, Lmao
jcextra 1 year ago
TO MUCH TO MUCH TO MUCH THIS IS A PRIME EXAMPLE OF WHAT JUANITA BYNUM SAID IS THE YOUTUBE CLIP "STOP SWEATIN ME"
1911beauty 1 year ago
i feel you xem......... check my page out, topic "Getting over someone you love"
Juakblaq 1 year ago
So? BGC is about more than that, and you are overreacting...the forums on BGC are legendary, where black gay men chat and read and throw shade to each other...let it go honey...
superman19742007 1 year ago
So he played you huh.... Play a India Irie song and get over it.
It happens to all of us.
DigableDude 1 year ago
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well said... most kats that are up on any site str8 or gay; "they mainly don't want a picture posted and with good reason... I can understand that" Even on Facebook." However, many are using job, school, etc as an escape goat. No so, because I say "if you can go 3soming with your face shown in sex parties and orgies. Then what is the issue?" No different. People are going to see u, talk about it, and god forbid if you taken; tell your other half. I say, "NO PIC? NO TALK" also no RESTRICTED #'s
paglioccimusic 1 year ago
well said... most kats that are up on any site str8 or gay; "they mainly don't want a picture posted and with good reason... I can understand that" Even on Facebook." However, many are using job, school, etc as an escape goat. No so, because I say "if you can go 3soming with your face shown in sex parties and orgies. Then what is the issue?" No different. People are going to see u, talk about it, and god forbid if you taken; tell your other half. I say, "NO PIC? NO TALK" also no RESTRICTED #'s
paglioccimusic 1 year ago
He Went In!
jamstone89 1 year ago
Ive had the same situation happen with me.
waltermyerspark 1 year ago
Xemi,.the madder you get the higher your voice gets it seems. I need to get into more of your videos...
RoRoFab79 1 year ago
go off
prettyboi513 1 year ago
I'm watching ur vids n u r so cute. I wish I can find sum1who is as intelligent as you with your ways of expressing your heart, mind, n soul. I enjoy ur vids. Huggiez!
ricanboy83 1 year ago
Your boy was wrong to hide his dating from you but you were wrong too. You sound like those guys that are so busy trying to get somewhere that they can't devote real time to a relationship. He was baggage, knew it and lived his life like it. Get some friends and a few pieces to lay with when you feel the need. You invited him to live the lie with you. Breaking him off some charity time is not a relationship. His needs sound small coming from you.
omegatopva 1 year ago
im sorry but i have to agree with lbnmiami because xem can't tell the guy that he can date other ppl if he wants but when he actually does it xem gets mad about it!dont say something you don't mean!thats just how i feel!!!!!toodles!!!:-)
stormsinger20 1 year ago
@stormsinger20 But, my point is that homeboy told xem that he wanted to be with him and told him he loved him. If he didn't do that, I'd agree with you but since Tiger did that, I'm with Xem.
SeraphSantana 1 year ago
where theres smoke theres FIRE!!!
gtownlad77 1 year ago
YOU better TALK!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dsosa720 1 year ago
ohh ohh man i dnt know his just not that in to you
mec21arts 1 year ago
honestly, there isn't much to say because i only heard one side of the story. what i will address is when you said "he can date other people" because you cannot devote enough time to spend with him, and that you weren't ready for a relationship. maybe your lack of time with him and/or your decision on dating other people may have caused him to go in another direction. evaluate yourself first before pointing fingers. there is more i want to say, but i can't because i am going over the word count.
lbnmiami 1 year ago
@lbnmiami I disagree. like he said, he didn't want Xem to put up pics. Then, Xem said he was telling Xem that he wanted him and wanted a relationship and that he loved him. Then pull this crap. Um . . .That means that he's (Tiger) is full of crap. If you are gonna say that you love someone and want that person to be in a relationship, then don't be going to look for some behind shortly after the person you said you want to be with leaves. Yes there are two sides but he said he loved Xem. Oh NO!
SeraphSantana 1 year ago
by now- i this is pretty old
I am drinking sangria as I write this- get rid of him and move on to me, total upgrade. lol
he 'could' be on there to just look at pix... but as you said not likely.
Just remember just b/c a man is on a diet, doesn't mean he can not look at the menu.
neva2b4gotten69 1 year ago
I'm sorry I knew this isn't funny but evey time you talk about that pic did you have to say locks blowing in the wind....I couldn't stop laughing lol anyway.......I would leave him alone listen to your gut.
starbright8701 1 year ago
man im sorry to tell u but ur man is cheatin and good u lettin him go. i went thro somethin similar w/ my fem gf so juz let him go...dont be like me and fall in love w/ them and end up hurt in the end
domcartel 1 year ago
I SO AGREE!
egomaniaxxl 2 years ago
Damn bro sorry! I would feel the same way as you.
sxzazz123 2 years ago
omg i hate your intro but your messages are sound.... well most of the time
Bmystyle 2 years ago
being on bgc is different from being on youtube, i think.. everyone watches youtube and only gay ppl for the most part uses bgc.. and u did say he could date other ppl.. so idk
bonesneil 2 years ago
Well...first I do want to acknowledge that I do FULLY understand your frustration and pain. However, you did express giving him permission to date other men. I'm curious to know what are you really mad about? Was your ego hurt that he was BGC or feeling hurt that he may not have wanted to be seen in pics with you? Did he actually step out of the parameters of the relationships; which you've stated he was not your boyfriend! I seem to have been capture by your vids and haven't been to sleep. Thx
cmr0608 2 years ago 2
@cmr0608 - I 100% agree with your comments!
SEFYH 1 year ago
DEAD @ YOUR SHIRT.
AdiBecicVault 2 years ago
Comment removed
goscene23 2 years ago
i found my 'friends' bgc. and its CRAZY that he has one because he SWEARS he is so "dl" and he wants to play this role like i'm the only guy he's ever been with. And its not just a regular ole' profile. NO! He's alternates between half and fully naked shots of himself...like...WTF? I feel you in this video Xem.
cnorthrop11 2 years ago
Some people need love to fill huge holes in their hearts that 1 person can't give, but that is no excuse to do something like that when 1 minute he says be with me and then as soon as your back is turned he's online. That is why alot of gay people(including me) have trust issues
KingSnoopy2004 2 years ago
THAT MOTHERFUCKER...Folk I fell you the whole way. dont change your mind not one second. Like you said if the dude can take picture the the damn water,but dont want one with you. HE was still looking for ASS. trust me you aint the first and want be the last. Keep it moving..and if you want I dont have a police record so we can key the car, sugar in tank, etc. I got bail money and a house to put on it. lol
yellowboy1980 2 years ago
oh he was most definately wrong and u had every right to be livid with him! and i second that 5 stars for ur "single" shirt Xem, haha.
fr3shjr 2 years ago
All I can think is he's bitter that you did not commit to being in a relationship with him. Also, most likely he didn't want you posting his pics because even though he's single he'd be percieved by many as not available. My lil sis does the same thing the same scenario happened with her even worse the guy paid for all of her stuff.
SoRealAmerica 2 years ago
I completly AGREE with you Xem because it happen to me five days ago and I went the fuck OFF! Maybe I should make a vid too. lol
mjk0386 2 years ago
I would beat his ass.
highu3 2 years ago
I feel your pain. I don't blame you for your anger. You have a valid point. I don't think you should brake up with him, but don't be played for a fool. Never ignore the writing on the wall. I hope he understands that you have lost trust in him.
platinumprince88 2 years ago
I luv the way he says "boyfriend", it's soo cute!!
stillgrow 2 years ago
5 Stars for the SINGLE shirt!
aseite 2 years ago
Xem is crazy, he said "really bitch, really bitch, really"lmao, ha ha ha ha ha!, sooo funny! luv u Xem!
stillgrow 2 years ago
hoes will be hoes
TonyFresh001 2 years ago 3
Clearly you were wrong until he lied and that just cannot be pushed aside. Lesson learned and know it is time to move on. (My smart friend i don't know)
Pebblies01 2 years ago
Well, at first I thought you had the right to be as moved as you were on the video as a result of your f*ck buddy having an account on bgc. I dont understand why you are so pissed when you guys didn't have anything serious going on, I mean, If im with someone for 9 months, and he tells me he is not ready for a relationship and that I can date other guys, then It means that I have the right to date guys. it was well understood between the two. whether i meet him at a club or a site - it was discu
Rafazzel 2 years ago 2
OMG Xem this is a mess!!!!!!!!!!! I cannot believe you wasted all that time on this loser!!!!!! I have no idea how this dude could do this and then to try and lie about it after you CLEARLY knew was just foolish!!!!!! Welp I guess another one bites the dust Xemmy Bear Keep hope alive
tennislover08 2 years ago
LOve ya Shirt Xem
rese721 2 years ago
(hilarious) Xem, you goin madd hawerd on this video. Tiger, Tiger Woods, how ironic. Love it mayne! I'll say this to you, don't ever let anyone get in the way of your focus. Him wanting all your attention and time only makes it clear that he is a selfish hearted person. That would explain why he had the BGC profile. He is too selfish and an attention whore. When he can't get yours he seeks attention from other people. He will unfortunatly always be that way. He is scared of lonely.
forbilive 2 years ago
What i can say is one you wrong for asking him in such a public place two you made it clear to him you not his man and not ready to be. you clownsed on the page saying discreet but thats better than sayin fuckin. you told him date other men and thats what he did but you cant chastize him for doin it in a was you dont find to be right. now he was a lil shady for getting online as soon as u left but i cant blame him what was he suppose to do sit and day dream about a man who dosent want 2 commit?
asaan100 2 years ago 2
And That Is...What Is...Up!
Continuing The Journey.....
SINGLE Status!
jaxjkaos 2 years ago
Xem My ex had a problem with me having a profile, and we had a lot of disputes about the page. Honestly I only log on to the site just to chat, and look at photos. I've only meet one 2 dudes off the site and one of them was him before he deleted his profile, and I've only givin my number out to a hand full of dudes on there. I don't see him having a profile on there as a reason to end what ever you two have going on together. You said he can date other people so what the real issue?
248YacNi99a 2 years ago
you said he was free to date other people....that site could have been a way for him to do that...that's why I can only be with one person where we ONLY dating each other!
islandboy082 2 years ago 2
I digg the shirt :0
lillilmike 2 years ago
wow to the power of 4
bigphat200 2 years ago
Xemy bear Come down, calm down!! take a breath-er.... things happen for reason. this just mean, dispite your success and all, you're destine for more.
jaefreedomchild 2 years ago
One thing I will say that bothered me, was when u said he said "you put everything b4 me", u might want 2 examine if he's boyfriend material, bcause that may b a sign of jealousy on his part. u need someone who supports u fully, who is just as career driven & focused on their goals as u r. I definitely don't see u as an inconsiderate person towards luv ones, so mos def "red flag" 4 u Xem.....
stillgrow 2 years ago
sounds like things were murky and undefined, so I can see why he would think it would be ok to have a profile on a dating website.
astrolabe1976 2 years ago
NEVER MAKE SOMEONE A PRIORITY, WHO ONLY THINKS OF YOU AS AN OPTION!!
I feel ya, Once something major like that happens, its hard to forgive that person because your trust has been betrayed. I recently been through the same thing. But the other person feels that since they didnt officailly cheat, its ok. But its not okay and it want be the same so i had to get out of the relationship.
quinngmble 2 years ago
Love your shirt.......
LeamajStudioz 2 years ago
Wow.
morethanablog 2 years ago
Comment removed
unpersona 2 years ago
i lke how ur wearing a single shirt. if your not his boyfriend and u said he could see other people he should be allowed to have his profile on that site. if u didn't ask he didn't have to tell u. he may have not wanted u to post his pics but he if free to fo so. yall need to talk and see where yall are cause yall ain't on the same page tight now.
7fire7ice7 2 years ago
Also... I think you vented very responsibly and i also think that if anyone who is afraid to step you after seeing this is only afraid becaue they KNOW they do shady shit and know that it wouldnt fly with you. A good guy wouldnt be intimidated by this!
rastapuppy 2 years ago
i totally agree with your thoughts on the matter! Even though some of the comments i have read are hating on u for putting it out there on youtube. I dont feel the same way you didnt disclose his name and could be talking about a plethora of other men. Only you, him and maybe ur close friends would know to whom you are referring to.
rastapuppy 2 years ago
Wow... that was very dramatic. I think many good prospective partners would be extremely gun shy of approaching you if they percieve that you have the inclination to use your platform to air out relationship issues. I recommend that you reserve the most sensitive details of your relatioinships private. I think that the happiest celebrity relationships are the ones that maintain a normal level of privacy. Peace.
papiroc59 2 years ago
I understand why you're upset, but should have been more clear. If ok to date, he may think it's okay to have an online dating profile.
As far as not wanting his pictures posted, I completly understand. Maybe he does not want all of Facebook and Youtube knowing his every move, what he had for dinner, when he went shopping etc., etc. Not everyone wants every detail of their life documented like you.
xu1993 2 years ago
Okay i love u down, but u seem a lil selfish on this one...HEs NOT YA MAN!!! Second arent you the same person who just blogged about seeing a cute spanish dude in the store and u were tryin to give him the "eye"!! Come on you dont wanna be his man, but u want him to act like u r wit u with all it comes with!!
Jaquarius2g4 2 years ago
NO MAM MISS PAM!! I feel he didnt come out an say yes i have ah bgc profile b/c most guys when they wanna be known as "discreet" or im a "good" guy feel ashamed to have a bgc profile. But from ah needy person (me) you feel like i like this person or i love this person and im not gettin all the attention i need or want so when not get it online knowinh im never gonna really do anythig with someone online.
gerome203 2 years ago
I was with you until you said that the two of you weren't official. If he had permission to date around as you said then I can find nothing wrong with what he did.
TVMaster89 2 years ago
Wow xem:(
I hope you read this cause i might have a reason as to why he has that profile. I think one of the main reasons why he has it is because like u stated u werent showing him the attention he needed so he would go on to that profile where he prob got LOTS of attention from other people something you werent giving him enough of. I think u should sit down with him and not try to blow it out of proportion because nothing gets resolved in arguments which i bet you prob know. Love you Xem:)
Ollelinda 2 years ago
xemmy im just went thru sumthin just like dat...he kept sayin he was gonna put my pics on but never did come to find out it he has 3 other bfs....im sure der were more but those were da only ones i found out by......niggas aint bout shit dez days...keep ur eyes on da prizes....
my03alero 2 years ago
Xemmy, you have come too far in your life and in the beginning stages of your career to deal with a man who is too afraid to be publicly seen with you. Im quite sure he knew who you were when the two of you met. Dating someone of your caliber comes with certain expectations. If he needs to find his comfort in BGC or any other forum in order to feel secure with your public awareness, then so be it. However, men like you need to be with others who dont rely upon such empty means of comfort.
SenecaSoul21225 2 years ago
Xemmy , let him go completely...its prolly harder then it sounds but let that one go.
MrBammx3 2 years ago
U mad huh Xen?
lol papi i think he dont want to get caught up with the whole no photo deal i mean if it was me i would only want to post one pic u know? just so people know im in yo life so he playing u papi like a game of monopoly
Damnyou1985 2 years ago
Xemie! You guys were not in a relationship!!!! I don't know the complete situation but I still think you like this dude and for some reason, I feel he still cares for you. Express your feellings to this dude the same way you told all of us! Xemie. . . Don't give up on this dude. Tell him your feelings! You clearly care about this dude. You wouldn't have posted this video if you didn't care. Friendships and relationship take WORK. GIVE that dude a call! Love ya Xemie!!!!
blknmuscular 2 years ago 2
Wow, somebody's mad.
misterhhyde 2 years ago
Ugh, wow your making me hate black gay men all the more, lol. i have this love hate relaionship with black gay bois, but I know its negative to say black gay men cant be trusted. Ill just say PEOPLE will be people. Keep it up, ur not the only one struggling with these bois
mandingo782 2 years ago
ooooh this is a messy video lol
cornrowedlowe 2 years ago
This appears to have very little to do with him, and much more to do with you. Sometimes we need to step back and look at our own behaviors and reactions to situations. It doesn't sound like he did much wrong at all except not be what you wanted him to be. Thanks for sharing your personal experience with us, but shouldn't you be discussing this with him?
adiosmotherfker 2 years ago
#1. You were not boyfriends according to you. #2Unless stipulated according to you agreed upon arrangement you were each free to use any resources to see other people. 3# Tiger did not break the rule of not having photos of both of you on any of one of your sites because he has pictures of himself in whatever attire. Mr. Adams your rant is "much to do about nothing!"
cleontdayiii2000 2 years ago 4
I am not surprised. That is the typical gay male lifestyle. This is the only reason I hate being gay. No commitment what-so-ever!
mancheeks64 2 years ago 2
Xen, Xen, Xen. You told him you were not...NOT ready for a relationship. HELLO?!!!!
mancheeks64 2 years ago 2
@mancheeks64 Ain't that the truth.
vester83 2 years ago
The other issue regarding him not wanting pics of you & him public, there's a huge difference between placing your profile on a social network site amongst many john does & being in photos as the partner of someone who is in the media spot light, bcause that person is now crittiqued as Xem's partner, which is not comfortable 4 everyne, so you really can't compare the 2.
stillgrow 2 years ago 2
Okay, what is the real issue Xem?
If he didnt wont yall picture together on your profile then that his right.... you two were not in a relationship all you can do is respect that..... 2nd why are you invested realatinonship time into somethin that not a relationship...3rd do you think that deep down you might be a lol jealous becuz you feel you can be replace... cuz at the end of the day he owes you nuttin at all if yall are not together
mykell850 2 years ago 2
I, of course don't know anyone, so I'm just giving my 2 cents, but it seems he didn't want you to post any pics of the two of you, so it would be easier for him to appear single and free on his BGC profile.
Granted, you apparently said it was cool to date others, but there still is a right and wrong way to go about anything. If he was professing all these deeper feelings for you, and acting hurt when you couldn't be with him, how is he having a hookup page? He's "Tiger" in many ways, huh?
pics2share 2 years ago
GO OFF BITCH !!!!!! SMFH!!!
curtisjackson1234 2 years ago
I LIKE YOUR SHIRT ~~~ SINGLE - YESS!!
curtisjackson1234 2 years ago
nice shirt
JayJayGrady4U 2 years ago
you DID tell him that he could date though....and on the other hand when you asked him about his profile, he wasnt up front with you, so on that end he's playing games.
RootsRunDeeep 2 years ago
u got maaaaaaaaad energy !
RootsRunDeeep 2 years ago
hmm it dodent look good that xem is puting the dude on blast about the time he spent with him holiday weekend. good times are timeless and unchanging BGC profile are not.About the profile pics no 1 can link him to Xem from those pics put if Xem posted pics of him theconnected can be made. I used a dating website while i was in a relationship it didnt mean anything.. its a good way to meet people., dont mean those people will get between the relationship
brucebrucern 2 years ago
let me start off by saying you betta werk.... i agree with you even though you didnt ask its still something he should have brought up....you are the oprah for gay men i just love you soo much lol continue your journey and i wish you the best of luck
DvonGarcon 2 years ago
Xem you got an empire to build..better to find out now than later when you have all these deals going and had the kids..DROP HIM!!! Its messed up that you poured so much energy into him and he couldn't give you the respect you deserve.
There will be a good man in the future but for now, GET YOURS!!!
landobnice 2 years ago
Maybe the the guy Xem is dating just doesn't want to be seen with Xem b/c of the attention that he would get b/c Xem is like a celebrity.
porghog 2 years ago
lol what is his username.
superseven6 2 years ago
Lmaooo hilarious
Death@ thee single shirt
He's most definitely in thee wrong, but don't let one bad person spoil everyone else's chance.
EtauBarbie 2 years ago
LOL...I just saw that7 minutes in to the Video....LOL
Zebulon1015 2 years ago
That's fuck up
demetice9 2 years ago
WOW!!!! That dude is giving Cancers a bad name. Yes, we are real needy of attention and affection. Yes, we want to be #1 in your life...but, when he said he wanted to be with you and you said that you didn't have time for a relationship, he should have accepted that because he still chose to work wit you. However, if you have giving him the option to date, he should have been man enough to let you know before you found out anything that he was on BGC "like that".
darnold713 2 years ago
If a guy says he wants to be with u but he doesn't want to be seen in public pictures with u how would u take that? Then discover he has his own public pictures on a hookup site....u all wouldn't be perplexed a little by that? That is what Xem is saying. Why can he be seen so publicly on a hookup site but can't be seen in public pictures with Xem yet he wants to be with Xem? Soon as he met someone else he might have just dropped Xem without a word.
TheMakingsofMyself 2 years ago
LMAO. wait yall see that pause at the end, then he had to stop and do his thanku's lol. Its ok young man. If yall wasn't in an official relationship then maybe he thought he was INDEED SINGLE and could do what he wanted until u said otherwise. But if he wouldn't even tell you about the page if asked..........well all he had to say was "well I'm still single" lol. o well..live and learn
TheMakingsofMyself 2 years ago
I can see why u are upset junior. If you discover that the person you are in a relationship with has an A4A or BGC profile, which is not social networking but hookup sites, and they make no mention of the truth of their relationship status and are logged on it then something is up. Yes it is........that is why nowadays men flip out over that because we know what those sites are for. If you see they are logged on then they are looking for something without u included.
TheMakingsofMyself 2 years ago
i agree... "discreet" means "i'm married/boo'd up and want to keep this on the DL." while i agree w/ those that are saying you can't have your cake and eat it, too, i would also say that him lying about it lets YOU know that he was in fact being a sneaky bitch. i mean, if it's not that serious, then why lie? all he had to do is remind you that you didn't want to be exclusive: feelings may have been hurt, but it would've healed. lies just cause distrust which is MUCH harder to heal. eff him.
kaycem 2 years ago
there is nothing wrong with your boyfriend having a bgc account,i dnt see nothing wrong with it,cuz if i was in a relationship i will still be keeping my social networks including bgc,.i can tell that u love him,forgive him
hotworkagain 2 years ago
Yea but most of the time folk who keep them up don't let folk know they are in a relationship now and still hook up from that site and a4a. so naturally people who discover they still have an active profile freak out. BGC and a4a are not social networking sites...they are sex hookup sites! Its not facebook and myspace
TheMakingsofMyself 2 years ago
yeah thats right,u can say some temptation is involve,cuz lets face it,we all got a list and your present bf may not have all the qualities u want and then there is the cheat who may have a missing quality that you crave,so hence you cheat,damn i wish i was in a relationship,i want to feel how its feels,
hotworkagain 2 years ago
im 26 and have never been in a relationship. i feel its no point. cause someone is going to cheat instead of communicating. i can do bad all by myself instead
chicagomarchingbands 2 years ago
me too i am the same age,but then again aftr awhile u r gonna feel lonely,when u hear your frens talking abt their bf,u r gonna be jealous,i am jealous of my fren he got a man and i dnt
hotworkagain 2 years ago
love the tshirt
hotworkagain 2 years ago
that's fucked up.
Xem you live and you learn,
move on.
keer2181 2 years ago
leave him. thats all.
bbrandonhollywood 2 years ago 2
If i had you on my arm there is no person that I wouldn't tell (Its not every day you meet a smart intelligent and driven man)
chris71785 2 years ago
Some of you are so simple minded and didnt listen to a word our Xemmy said. Ive watched the video 3 times now. He clearly states that he didnt mind the guy being on BGC. He said he has a problem with the fact that the guy posted his photos all over the site and didnt feel comfortable with Xemmy sharing the photos with us because of his online popularity. Furthermore, who goes onto BGC if they arent looking for sex? He wont find a dude of Xemmy's caliber or anyone similar on there. Its garbage!
Sebastian030683 2 years ago
That is exactly the moral of the story. Xem said the guy wanted a relationship and xem didnt. But he couldn't put pictures of them together no where yet he got pics of himself on a hookup site. Clearly he didn't want to people to see them together in case he met someone else and would have probably made xem an after thought right then and there
TheMakingsofMyself 2 years ago
Its not simple minded to think that way because clearly u can see that this is deeper than just posting pics!!!! Xem gagged when he found out that the person he maybe in love with was entertaining other me!!!! The pics on a page are just an argueing point!! Xem if u love him and u want him make it clear to him, cause if u loose him it will hurt more!!!
Jaquarius2g4 2 years ago
My take if you told him he could date and you were not ready, then he really hasn't done anything wrong. You gave him permision to date others so whats the prob.
action1016 2 years ago
His actions are not acceptable.
smartwittyromantic 2 years ago
It seems there was a lack or total failure of communication between both parties. I found it to be mind boggling as you put it that he would constantly try to make you to be "his" all talk? If he truly wanted to spend his life with you and all of this he would have been forthcomming. I went through a similar situation and had to cut that person loose for similar antics.
You are complete right about that discrete bs. If there is nothing to hide there is no reason to lie.
dariusd2003 2 years ago
You can NOT have your CAKE and eat it 2
You said he could see other ppl. You don't get to choose them.
If you want to be his ONE and ONLY then you need to make time.
Why would you even start a relationship and you know you were not ready to meet his needs ?
I will tell you why, its because you are full of Shit.
You know this MAN has needs that you are not ready to meet. Then you have the ball to go off. I LOVE U DUDE, but this is bullshit !
iwant2cthatass 2 years ago
thats not what the problem is. Why is it that guy can have his picture all over BGC for everyone to see, but if Xem wanted to put pics of them together on his facebook or on here he wouldn't let him? Thats what the point of the video is. "I can't show us together in photos but u can have a hookup account for all the world to see?". he didn't want people to think they were together and soon as something else came along Xem probably wouldn't hear from him at all
TheMakingsofMyself 2 years ago
I do not know the full story haven't heard both side but what I can conclude from this is you should let him know what you know show him the proof and just have a fully open conversation about as much as possible and that's only if you feel as if he is worth spending that time ! ~Kei
SxchaFxkknFemm 2 years ago
Like my mother use to say a snake won't bite you unless you step on it. There is a snake in your environment. LET GO GET OUT NOW!! DON'T WAIT DON'T WALK RUN. IF it look like a duck. kwack like a duck, it is a duck.
ladyvm123 2 years ago
I am sorry, but u really just need 2 move on... U r waaay 2 smart, talented, and good-looking 2 b worried about a total asshole... Honestly if I were u, i would b posting this blog from inside a jail cell. Ignorance is my kill-switch and after that medley of ignorance had spewn from his mouth and to my ears, i would have Beat his ass untill I lost conciouseness... But u b strong and u'll find a better man real soon. Hell i jus might take a swing at yo fine ass- lol
bova200587 2 years ago
Xem, you were done wrong and u don't desevre that. Yes, given he was not in a relationship with this person. However, this person gave him hope under false pretenses. Don't say I don't want you posting pics of me or of us together because you are a public figure and then go behind his back and be on BGC and have pics of himself all over his profile. Then don't lie when you get confront about. Just be honest. So Xem, you feelings are valid.
MalikNero 2 years ago