BRASS EYE - CRIME 3/3

[tdkzero]

I quite like the sound of somebody killing Vanessa Veltz

[usernamealredytaken]

Geoffrey Boycott what a legend!

[losarman]

@usernamealredytaken a wife beating one

[usernamealredytaken]

@losarman spot on, he takes no shit

[joebstarsurfer]

its the news now lol its war out there.

[ISBAILEYDEADYET]

It's as simple as this: If you think Brasseye was in bad taste or don't understand it, then YOU are the type of shmuck he's ripping the piss out of; it's like an idiot test, and it's sublime!

[milbytrillion]

no way! really?!

that's my opinion

oh right, ok

[allegramente5000]

I'm amazed how the great film director Michael Winner was lured into saying such extraordinary nonsense at 2:20-in hindsight he probably has a favourable take on the matter. Something along the lines of: "it is a distinct honour to have been part of this groundbreaking series-i greatly admire the work of Chris Morris"

[GallagherWellerBrown]

If I was a murderer, the thought that I had just killed Vanessa Feltz would actually make me feel better about myself.

[10APC]

"Portillo...look out behind you". I think they would use 'Hague' now instead.....this prison terminology is quite interesting.

[blindthrall]

Newsdwarf is the man.

[joeymod135]

TOMMY WAS A TOP MAN THOUGH.

[Misishaxi]

"Thanks to the newdwarf"

"Pleasure, Chris"

[fascinesta]

I'd kill her...

[PurushaDesa]

Wonders never cease. The ABSOLUTE SHITE these people will say for money and screen time.

[wonietang123]

You killed me, what the hell did you do that for? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[freedeirdrerasheed]

I'm marvin gaye; shot by my own father!

[renagadeUK]

hahaha that bike scene will never get old

[eyeofthebeholder447]

IN HOLLAND

[PinkRob0t]

s-s-s-say that again...

[BucketfulOfFruit]

then why the hell did you come back , alright easy now

[cowenfiley]

feltz twat

[Xnilb90]

What if you didn't take their, life, but you just murdered them?

[snomad08]

how fast is he peddling hahahahaha Chris morris is a legend of comedy!

[joelthefrog1]

Loose wardrobe...

Awesome

[meitis12]

buff my pylon=gives us a fag you owe me 2 so im letting you off the other one

dont buff my pylon=switch over the telly

chris morris needs to come back with brasseye how he got these clowns to say this shit is genius

[azapro911]

I'd like to ask anyone in 'Howard's Arse' about the state of the '1-0 at half-time', how frequently they get 'Woggy Coconuts', if a 'Gazza' is enough to buy your way out of a 'Buff My Pylon', and if the 'Portillo' situation in the showers is as bad as people say it is.

[mhlamb1]

Do you think people wouldn't notice if you were only half out of the bed...

[iradamo]

me too....its great to c all these saps humiliated...love brass eye

[Surfking9000]

Bill Bailly is in the cast but I mind seeing him in it.

[fisho1969]

"get right out of the bed" ...lol!

[lor1m3r]

How the hell did Morris get the likes of Winner and Feltz to deliver his lines so perfectly?

Does anyone know if he was personally present for those bits of filming?

[renagadeUK]

5.20 when he's on the bike, fukin hilarious

[rorrt]

i have to say Chris Morris really is a comedy genius.

and anyone who says that these shows are in bad taste, eff off. its like the PedoGeddon episode, its never a joke on the subject, but the medias response to them. its a satire of the sensationalist journalism that happens on ITV, and sometimes BBC.

[FFSINEEDANAME]

bahahahah yes Vanessa! Of all the people they could get.

[GAKUSK]

oh my God the porn played at riots could actually work

[932sd]

I seem to recall Morris making alot of gay jokes about Portillo...years before Portillo actually admitted he'd had homosexual experiences when younger. Amongst other gags Morris is pretty much a modern day Nostradamus.

[srjones8]

that's because he was the one who bummed portillo at university

[jimpurdie]

buff not puff

[cuntwagon99]

puff my pylon!

[loumiller4]

"In Holland, they've halved the crime rate by legalizing murder!"

[wonietang123]

@loumiller4 HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[intheTea04]

"Portillo...look out behind you"

[TheAnxiousMan]

Bill Bailey's listed as cast member...?

[lfstorey]

could be one of the kids in the harsh pound??

[jetblackram]

Oh poor Tommy Vance.

[CurlyisKing]

6:01 LMFAO

[tanzarian101]

"I'm Marvin Gaye......shot by my own father"

[kevw73]

morris is a fucking genius

[BrosoKintobor]

All hail the News Dwarf!

[azzychazzy]

Aaah after listening to Geoff Boycott on the radio all day this is just perfect. :)

"Gyet out of t'bed..."

[a1exxm]

news dwarf is brilliant. i love chris morris

[chrisdavidi]

3:01-3:53 LOLOLOLOL

[japanesesweet]

Michael Winner's contribution is my favourite from this segment....this is genius and as with all Chris Morris repays repeated viewing.

'Terrorism' is keenly anticipated.

[bolbonz]

Lol I thought Geoff Boycott was one out of many of the typically silly sounding names you'd expect to hear or read on brasseye.

Mercdriver doesn't find this funny (well, he might have watched the video and laughed - not that that was his intention) he is a nutter who I argued with a few times and decided to respond to messages I left on my favourited videos (I did comment once before on here months ago) as a way to annoy me. oh, so please downvote him.

[backtojack]

remember the best technique is to look at that bed. and try and get as far away from it as possible

[n00bkilla66]

'I hate, you.'

[UseYourIllusions123]

haha such a good programme!

wish they still did it!!

[pat44444444444444444]

Get right out of the bed.

[joellyshooshoo]

we all had keys to everyone elses houses XDD i don't watch TV much these days but it seems to me nothing is as daring as this... I WANT TV SHOWS WITH BALLS!!! XDD

[joellyshooshoo]

vanessa feltz almost killed me

[Mophesto13]

You killed her! Particularly if you happen to be Marvin Gaye's dad.

[StonerKid655321]

Venessa felts was fit in those days.

[boydegg]

Thank you, the news dwarf.

[antonb1983]

your welcome chris

[petergibbonsTPP]

they gone and banged you up good and proper

[talatsmum]

that murder message was AMAZING

genious..

lol

[gratedraindrop]

I'm so glad that somebody made a fool of that annoying Vanessa Feltz!

[jonyfry]

if you didnt take someones life, you just murdered them? lol

[bishopthumpertythump]

I find that I get the best runs when I'm slack!

[Brenho]

Damn. I'm only half out of the bed right now!

[TheSecretIgloo]

the best technique is to look at that bed, and then try and get as far away from it as possible"

Comic genious!

[derangedband]

i should record that and set it up as my alarm clock in the morning XD

[littleraisin89]

i've done that! it really is my alarm!

[liamemac]

priceless

[CharitableView]

RIP Tommy Vance - he was so intrinsically great that even if he didn't realise that this was disingenuous - which I'm sure he did - it still sounds exactly the same as all the other voiceovers he did. Hope that makes sense

[Poorglands]

Haha yeah especially the way he's riding so fast!

[bennjuii]

the best bit is when he's riding the bike

its so unnecessary!

[enyap88]

howard's arse

[Mick342]

NUT BROWN ALE.

[sxxxhvampire]

"im marvin gaye shot by my own father"

HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAHA i can't believe those words came out of vanessa feltz mouth!

classic.

[thegreenonionuk]

..lkjlkjlkjlkjlkj

[invertedchords]

"Portillo is "look out behind you" chris always says somethin bout portillos gayness. its so funny. he mst not like gay people.

[agt155]

This program came out before Portillo had been 'outed'.

[bukkakeblackbelt]

"thanks to the news dwarf"

[McGraw127]

''What if u didnt take their life but you JUST murdered them?''

it makes sense in a deep way

[ColdDev4]

Do you reckon that was the intention?

[McGraw127]

you, killed, me! what the HELL did you do that for?!

[KaliberKing]

when's this terrorism thing out?

[chrisjako]

3:11.....so funny.

[StubfingeredDave]

Wasn't the News Dwarf in Black Books? The gangster, I forget his name. He sounds really similar.

[t3hvoivod]

Yeah it is, well spotted!!

[truthcanbeadjusted]

Vanessa Feltz makes me cringe with laughter every time.

"face stabbed off in panic"

[andrew1983123]

PORTILLO

[RYANKOKO]

How many people has he stitched up its unbelievable. He would make a seriously good con man crime. Chezch neck!

[deadanimalfreakshow]

Portillo...Look behind you hahahaha

[scottmasson01]

fucking brilliant. Is chris morris allowed on the TV anymore? I heard he got banned after the pedo special but i think it might just be rumor?

[warriorofwrestling]

He had something to do with Time Trumpet I believe, and also appeared in The IT Crowd, rumour has it he's doing a feature-length production about terrorism

[scottmasson01]

o yer i remember seeing him on the IT Crowd. can't wait for this terrorism thing!

[duncabbin]

he is also reported to be writing something with Charlie Brooker

[scottmasson01]

cheerz

[markess1981]

Is it Nathan Balrey season 2? I've heard that might be getting made.

[DMStern]

Oh God I just came hard.

[bixieface]

"buff my pylons". first time I ever saw this I almost wet myself. Best TV programme ever, Morris is a genius.

[madbadJim]

witty quick silly, intelligent all together, but the midget got me when he said thanks.

[plevyman]

Get right out of the bed. No half-measures, you must get your whole body out of the bed.

[sarahshoe632]

i forgot how brilliant this was.

[stoph2]

actual comedy genius! i love the bit at the end where he keeps asking the same question. we have nothing this good on tv now!

[agathox89]

I'm Marvin Gaye shot by my own father.

[mistaben2k]

That was very funny,

more Brass Eye piease

channel 4 and I'll watch Big Brother!

[stewlil]

got banned i think

[bolbonz]

''im the old lady whose head you stoved in with a loose wardrobe'' bwaa ha ha ha

[mercdriver]

Lol

[MercdriverIsBack]

Lol

[armlesscorps]

That end bit is the best bit.

"everythings about opinions"

"is it??.....wait yes it is "

LOL

[attakRELOAD91]

omg the vanessa feltz bit!! LOL!

[shinyhippy]

"You've gone and done it again, you little bugger!"

Genius...

[MikeZar]

Superb!

Forgot how funny th end was, and the Vanessa Feltz bit

[siripswich]

the key 2000 bit was the best!