The Long Lost Space-Logs of One Admiral P. Halkett

[Ebrainiac1]

Am i incorrect in assuming that no other viewers of this video assumed the title to be referencing cylindrical sections of a material derived from the main body of a photosynthesizing coniferous organism?

[steveharley0345]

Hapless grandmother indeed.

[TimM676]

there is something irrefutably hilarious about seeing a boy smash a pilow with glass breaking sound effects

[doommetaldoom]

I AM GORON THE MORON! *puke* man you'd be my best play mate if I was a kid ;p yes I was put into a asylum and a slam for quite a lot of my childhood, never took the meds though

[SpitfireBoy86]

Life would be so much better with sound effects like that in actuality.

[DumbTomato]

This video is art in it's purest form.

A great journey of sadness, happiness, friendship and self discovery.

I feel inspired. I feel like a new person born anew.

This is a day to remember.

This story is one to treasure.

The greatest work mankind may have ever witnessed.

[ranchdressing]

...um...who the fuck is this hilarious kid?

[MrTennek]

@ranchdressing Admiral P. Halkett.(or should I say, 'FORMER' Admiral P. Halkett)

I thought that much was obvious from the title.....

[PyrotechnicsGuy]

This video has inspired me to begin life anew and move to Alabama where crap like this can be tolerated by the populace.

[OneCorruptedSoul]

Colonel Jac0BZzzz231

4|\|\) S01010100111 _________100010101

110101010101_____1010101010101­____10101010

Admir@1 H=cKK377 was sen____d to l1f3 in is01471@|\| in pl@N37 M_th3RRF4___.

PRIORIT%%% COD# R3|) CONF1|)3N714|_

ADMIR4L H4ck3ytttt h4s>>>>..>.>.===-=_

Memory Leak, all other data has been lost.

M13X-12

______________________________­______

Found while searching a spacecraft shuttle that with a dead man with a holotape.

[loluntilmypie]

1:06 And during the video, the boy learns what puberty is.

[samusco89]

Fuck... humor comes in strange forms. Why the fuck are you not famous yet?

[MrTennek]

I don't fucking well have the faintest fucking clue...

Fuck.

[thizda]

OH GOD...HE TRANSFORMING!....

Meanwhile, a fatman was puking on a driveway drunk, unknown that he was going crazy smashing stuff for no absoloute reason whatsoever, while the granfather was cooking pancakes optimus prime ate a pancake and blew up the house.

The end.

[MrTennek]

The greatest story ever told.

[TehG3A3]

Keep the space logs coming.

[TehG3A3]

As the admiral's grandmother flees in terror, Gorok begins destroying the ship with no remorse for the refugees inside. Gorok then vomits a living banana peel, who reveals himself as the even more infamous Popo Jijo. Popo attaches himself to the admiral's head and begins laying waste to his brain. Thinking he is now a serial killer thanks to Popo invading his brain, a horrifying parasite bursts out of the admiral onto his cowering grandmother. The admiral now roams the planet as a freak.

[TehG3A3]

Deep in the outer reaches of space, Admiral Preston Halkett and his grandmother are on an expedition to God-knows-where when he reminisces about his days as a male dominatrix, "punishing" his grandmother in the process. They receive a distress call from his grandmother's twin sister whilst his grandmother tries to ward off her grandson. Knowing the Intergalactic Police of the Solar Federation may be after him for non-consentual sex acts upon alien women, he takes the alias of Captain Arwin "A" M

[TehG3A3]

eter to avoid possible arrest/execution/anal evisceration. After meeting his grandmother's sister, she has other survivors with her. Halkett is dissatisfied with this, and orders them into the ship before they too get "punished". Trying to make a joke, his grandmother takes the admiral's pistol out from his holster. Unknowing to her, it for one is something very treasured to him, and has been illegal since the Ballistic Small Arms Pact of 2112. Suddenly, the infamous Gorok "The Mortal" attacks.

[TehG3A3]

Forget timelines, I'm making a full description.

[Spooonth]

Even during early childhood, John Tennek's prodigious talents were quite apparent.

[Hexxon]

In the future, history books around the world shall tell the tale of Admiral P. Halkett, his plight, and that which no mortal could ever understand.

[Zimy0]

Come to think of it, why was there a camera there? Did you just set it up in random places?

[MrTennek]

It's called 'making a home movie'. Believe it or not, but all of these charming little vignettes had actual "plot-lines" to them.

[chosentonessournotes]

It has to be a behavioral study... Just look at that haircut!

[veblice]

I'M HERE TO RESCUE YOU!!!!

[auxiliaryoverdrive]

Was this being filmed for a behavioural study? Can't think why else the camera was in such odd places....great use of music after 1:02 by the way!

[matthewjdenn]

LOL, you must have drove your poor grandmother up the wall.

[moo5009]

Rofl wtf is wrong with you?

[MrTennek]

I'll be sure to travel back in time twelve years and ask myself that question.

[DJStry]

@MrTennek well...I suppose it takes one hyperactive as hell kid to come up with such brilliant YTPs....despite that fact, it's still an awesome ytp :3

[Silvyre]

why did i laugh so hard

[Dipstikk]

SO, HOW ARE THE WILD THINGS, MAX?

[dEEfucked]

oh my god, this is one of the funniest video i've ever seen XDD

[biasbastard]

Patient 557 was a particularly extraordinary case. Based on records from past institutions, he suffered from a severe case of hyperreality upon viewing the original "Star Trek" television programme. He perceived the events of the series as broadcasts on live television. The unhealthy obsession manifested into a delusion that he was the captain of a vessel similar to that of the Enterprise. This recording is an example of one attempt to exercise disciplinary measures on one of his "crew members."

[JagaimoLoco]

Do I want to know what actually got thrown at his grandma after he yelled "Here's Johnny"?

[TehG3A3]

Seems like a loaf of bread.

[MrTennek]

That or a severed arm; whichever you prefer.

[TehG3A3]

For those who are completely confused, I may make a timeline of this video to help them find out what happened to Admiral Halkett.

[ChristopherCooler]

How many times as a child were you arrested for destruction to local property and the mental scarring of others?

[myhatsonfire]

Your grandmother seems remarkably complacent.

[SargentMugen]

Good lord, 666 views!

[Skyhartt]

This reminds me of my childhood. Except I was a super space Admiral. NO ONE SURVIVED

[TheSchizoKing]

This is why I don't want kids. :3

[MrTennek]

Why? The prospect of being bludgeoned repeatedly with various household objects and screamed at profusely for an innumerable number of years doesn't appeal to you?

[LassesIndex]

Tags:

space logs home movies acute blunt physical trauma glass smashing bone gnashing entrails splashing hapless grandmother and psychotically over-caffeinated child HERE'S JOHNNY BLAAAAAARRRGGGGGG

Crazy shit, by the way!

[samusco89]

DAS IST EIN FANTASTISH DE LA VIDEO!!!

WONDABAR!!!!

ICH BIN NEIN DEUTCH!!!

Good to see ol Mr.Tennek is still up to debauchery . I still think he should get his own TV show.

[MephitisRocks]

Also note: Many assumptions have been made that Admiral Halkett is also one Captain A. Meter, however these observations may not be entirely credible.

[MephitisRocks]

Note: at 0:45, it is visible that Halkett can materialize wooden bats from what seems to be nothing, which may admit some credibility to the theory of his ESP, and the delusional paranoia of the false woman sharing the same room.

[SayajinDwarf]

I love you...

[Physhi]

What a sad childhood, an ogre invades, you attempt to save your grandma, and is convinced she is perfectly safe while you are later attacked by a ... I don't know what you were attacked by, but it must have been terrifying.

[panzermarch1944]

Watching this made my life complete.

Good show MrTennek, good show

[veblice]

You were one messed up child weren't you Mr.Tennek.

[MrTennek]

You speak as if the 'messed-up-ness' lessened as the years went on.

[xAllisOnex]

So beautiful.

; - ;

[wickedfeylady]

Does David Lynch direct your home movies?

[DasPooperTrooper]

ADHD

[MrTennek]

No, just far too much caffeine.

[willfreedo]

If we do not destroy ourselves, we will one day venture to the stars.

But he's already destroying ourselves D:

[Pkyewbeam]

YOU HAVE TO GET PUNISHED NOW

[deimos1984rd]

HEEEERE'S JOHNNY!!!!

[Spyer]

Oh dear, all that glass!

[JagaimoLoco]

Everything he touches explodes into ruin.

[xBullSh1ftx]

I AM QUARONG THE MORANG!

[animeguy2356]

... cannot be found in this video.

(see description for those who don't get it)

[SonicobbsessedR2]

you have the best home videos ever, plus the best case of childhood adhd and asburgers

[SonicobbsessedR2]

dont you guys remember? Admiral P. Halkett circumnavigated the globe soon after the descovery of the new world, and was almost killed by GORON THE MORON on the philipinne islands but escaped, he tried to tell the story as accuratly as possibe, but faied.

[SonicobbsessedR2]

*failed

he was clubbed to death later by skepticks after the infiltrated his wealthy home on corisca.

[accordionsfrommars]

lol @ the panpipe polka

[Kirbydamasta]

QUIT SMILING

[Hexxon]

WELL LET ME HAVE IT NEXT TIME

[TurboBabyPuncher]

I can only stare in awe at my computer screen.

[N8DT7777777]

It's things like this that make me want to switch to a career as a foley artist.

[HouseofPainProd]

"I AM GORON, THE MORON!"

[teckwerks]

Oh am surry you gotta get punish now. Ho ho~

[PwnzorBob]

Your house seemed to have been made of an excessive amount of fragile parts and explodiary contrivances.

You also seem to have caught this syndrome, as does your mother.

[PwnzorBob]

I mean GRANDMOTHER, GODDAMNIT.

I think.

[Gollon666]

The Stooge Hair-cut Experiment went horribly wrong when it caused an early onset of dementia and loss of bowel control.

[ebfjzfiibg]

Here's what I say, leave space alone. It is ones nightmare to wonder upon some dude with a baseball bat beating up couch cushions.

[xXBR4D3NXx]

HEEEERE'S JOHNNY

[TheToenninga]

Just add some sound effects and you have a masterpiece.

Brilliant.

[SpamNapkin]

JOHNNNYAAAAHHHHHHHH *fart*

[bzfan]

Space hair-cut

[TRMario]

it's amazing what sound effects can do.

[tomnooktheraccoon]

It's Admiral P. Halkett