QI Series D, Episode 1, Part 2

[TheTutSpace]

50 men, with 200 strings.

How do you control 4 strings at once? :/

[binaway]

There has been a live winner of the Darwin award. While drunk and for a laugh he place a part of his body in a golf-ball cleaning machine and switched on. Thereby removing himself from the gene pool.

[Cresendoll]

I want a .gif if facepalmin Alan.

[TheMikkelet]

I love Stephen Fry's facial expression when he realized he said money! XD

[skullythecreator]

"two bears crawled out and they was shot" - Clearly Charles Darwin shouting "damn you!" Evolve! :LLLL

[andromidius]

@skullythecreator I know you're joking, but that isn't how evolution works. Hope you realise that.

[naruhina0827]

"the gene pool needs a little chlorine"

xD

[heyysimone]

went a mile up and froze to death! hahaha

[goibee]

Des Lynam? The God of us Pakistanis? That arse couldn't even commit to Countdown!

[bellboy64]

6:10 Stephen's reaction to what he says is priceless. If people need convincing of why everyone loves Stephen Fry so much this would be a start!

[NME1995]

I told my mother about the two bears. She didn't like my reaction of hysterical laughter. She doesn't realise that an entire studio audience also found it amusing.

[janmicos]

@NME1995 had the same reaction with my mum it must be a mum thing!

[2nd3rd1st]

"Two bears crawled out and they were shot!"

*roaring laughter*

[WillShakespeare2007]

Googled it and found this and found this article:

"At least 17 people including eight children lost their lives and more than 500 injured while celebrating Basant or kites flying festival Sunday in Lahore, capital of eastern Punjab province, taking the death toll to 20 as three people were killed on Basant night, The Nation reported Monday."

Amazing!

[rayechayelle1]

another darwin awards story i kno of is a guy performing home-lyposuction. he cut in2 his skin and tried use a vacuum cleaner to suck the fat out... no surprsie he died of blood loss and internal injuries a little while later.

[aaron9099]

@rayechayelle1 lol

[TheZionatorX10]

and again... -_-

[TheZionatorX10]

nearlybroke my ipad by snorting my 7up all ofer it when he said buckaroo

[imaderobotsoccerteam]

In Pakistan shit happens!

[MiceHellHillPips]

... and then again at Sean Lock at 2:10...

[MiceHellHillPips]

drinking beer and actually snorted it all over my face at Jo Brand's 'Buckaroo' at 0:25 ish).

such a good show. i'm now learning it by heart.

[animals4eva]

i wish us kiwis invented the bungee jump...

[20eric07]

The kites thing actually happens pretty much all the time over here in Brazil... not even a sport.

[breekbaard]

The guy in the ballon chair actually shot himself in a forest near his house.

[cooliovasquez]

@breekbaard yeah like 10 years later i have that book

[PianoWizzy]

"He died in a bed of diabetes."

[zofie123]

This is such a good line-up! I love them all to pieces.

[thebluemangroup]

"I'm gonna give you the money....POINTS!!"

LOL I love him :D

xx

[IoEstasCedonta]

Phil Spector deserves a mention...

[brosue4]

80,546 views and no dislikes. Quality speaks for itself

[Bobstew68]

@brosue4 Then again, there are only 173 likes (at the moment of this comment). So only 0.2% of the viewers liked it. :)

[chap1400]

@Bobstew68 id have thought more like 95% or viewers liked it...its just 0.2% could be bother to click the 'Like' button ^^

[Bobstew68]

@chap1400 Of course. And that is why saying "80k views and no dislikes" isn't quite right. :) I was just playing with his use of statistics there.

[9reasy5am]

146 people have good taste in television.

[dim432]

How do people die From Tea Cosy huh, Strangled to death

[jjjjsadk]

The sport of kite running is practised in Afghanistan as well, or it least it used to be. Who have read the novel Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini?

[Loverwife]

@xakatski

He never claimed to know everything.

Also, what he said was a joke.

[ishopinamsterdam]

jumping of a bridge with a tow rope in an attempt to bungee jump? that's got american redneck written all over it!!

[80conway80]

I love how people can't watch a comedy program on here without arguing about some pointless Bullshit. Take your intellectual cock-measuring somewhere else - your boring.

[crimsletons90]

@80conway80 well said!!

[ishopinamsterdam]

@80conway80 yeah if you want to be serious, u are not in ur place just watch enjoy and maybe even have a laugh if ur not being offended by the stuff that aplies to you

[OakTelevision]

@80conway80 "you're".

[bjossus]

@80conway80 Whose boring were you referring to?

[FatBastardIRL]

@80conway80 you're*

[M0man]

@80conway80 You're*

[luludevreeze]

LOL. Chill everyone. What does it matter?

[luludevreeze]

@xakatski He was making a joke: that Des Lyneham was a God. He knows that Des Lyneham is not a God, anywhere, let alone Pakistan. Joke, see?

[872463051]

@xakatski first off, "Islamic" isn't a word. "Muslim" is the word you are looking for. Secondly, that was sarcasm, fucking idiot. Betcha Fry KNEW that, you dumbass.

[philipmerewood]

@872463051 Islamic is the adjective form of Islam (noun), the religion,culture etc. of Muslims

[872463051]

@philipmerewood No, Muslim is the adjective form of Islam. You are describing the people, not the religion . Muslim = a person/people, Islam = name of the religion.

[philipmerewood]

@872463051 Of course Islamic is an adjective of Islam; i.e. when describing the architecture of some eastern christian churches one could say it has Islamic influences (I am not describing the people but the likeness to Islam with the word Islamic). I was just commentating on the fact that Islamic is a word. and where in my comment (Islam-religion culture, of Muslims) did I not say Muslim-people and Islam=religion.

[philipmerewood]

@872463051 All I was saying is that Islamic is an OED word; Islamic describes something that has the qualities of the religion or culture of Islam. I never said Muslim was not a person subscribing to the Islamic faith infact "Islam is the religion...of Muslims"

[philipmerewood]

@872463051 Muslim "ONE who submits" Islam "To submit"(or peace)". Therefore one could say The God OF Muslims or the Islamic God. i.e.Muslim – should be used to describe all people of the Islamic faith but not the faith itself. You may say that you are interested in the religion of Muslims, but never in the Muslim religion.

[872463051]

@philipmerewood ...except you can't say "Islamic God." It would be "Muslim God." That would be like saying "The God of the religion of Islam," not "The God of the Muslim people," as is proper.

[philipmerewood]

@87246305

Muslim God. Muslim is referring to a group & not the singular. Therefore this would suggest that Muslim is a collective noun; e.g. : the 'family' was/were wearing green, This 'team' is/are, Now replacing Muslim in family and team it is apparent that the singular determiner is proper: The Muslim were?, this Muslim are? Showing that Muslim is indeed a singular noun and deserves the plural identifier 's' to suggest a group, therefore the Muslims God is proper and not the Muslim God.

[872463051]

@philipmerewood First of all, it is important to note that it's not English grammar, but rather Arabic grammar that is in play here, which explains the difference between Islam and Muslim. Even with English grammar, though, it is proper to say "Muslim God" just as it is proper to say the "Family car," the "school gym," even the "Christian God," etc... Islam is a religion, Muslim refers to the people who follow that religion. Do you even know what you are talking about?

[philipmerewood]

@872463051 English language has many quirks but we still do not ape the grammar of the language under discussion?'. Ernest Carl (Islamic Scholar) from "Following Muhammad" "Islam has a derivative meaning relating to the community of those who have submitted to God," Expand family or school (into a usable phrase!!!) (on its own with no other identifiers) and you can use both adequately with was/were, is/are..you cant do this with Muslim therefore it is not a collective noun and deserves a plural

[philipmerewood]

@872463051 Sorry for semantics but I am sure you also mean etymology not grammar? The God of Islam:*i.e. one may use this legitimately when demarking this God from Gods in other religions.. is an 'of-construct' and is therefore interchangeable with the genitive construct i.e., Islam’s God. We can also therefore modify this phrase in its adjective form the Islamic God (see previous ref to Ernst Carl)

[872463051]

@philipmerewood youtube doesn't give me enough allowed characters for me to explain why you are wrong, so look forward to an inbox message.

[philipmerewood]

@872463051 Very true have had to annoyingly cut down posts I look forward to your explanation as i am very willing to except I am mistaken, I am not arrogant enough to suggest their is only one way of thought.

[bellboy64]

Fry's face when he corrects himself is priceless.

(Money=points)

[Foundlilly11]

@xakatski For your information, Allah is just the name of God, not the islamic God, but God. If they would talk about 'the christian God' they would call him Allah too.

[gloomyoutlook]

@Foundlilly11

Not to be pedantic, but the Urdu word for God is Khuda (though it's borrowed from Persian), and Allah is really an Arabic word :]

[ishopinamsterdam]

@gloomyoutlook no ur both wrong you know the real term for the "god" figure is nothing more then imaginary

[jamboliboli]

@Foundlilly11

haha, you are a little shit.

[IcEye89]

The gene-pool needs a little chlorine.

Perfectly quotable and so very true.

[rynox45]

@xakatski He was referring to Jo's comment about Des Lynam.

[PollyJuice]

The morons who sent the animals over the falls should have been locked into barrells and shoved over the edge themselves, ***holes! >:(

[peuterschmidt]

Perhaps he was talking about des lynam...

[kllr101]

@xakatski He was making a joke at Des Lynam, Joe said "do they all have to have his face on them" and he went "he's seen as god over there"

You are the deaf one here.

[xiangyik]

@xakatski He was joking, you humorless prick.

[DashTTG]

@xakatski

Actually, if Islam had a god it was sure could not be represented in image form, why did it throw a fit when a European newspaper do exactly that? Or did you all suddenly realize that your ridiculous deity was just as easily recreated as any other of the silly monotheistic religions' like Christianity and Judaism?

QI is no place for you.

[xakatski]

@DashTTG says the guy who makes drunk nerd vids

[DashTTG]

@xakatski

>making fun of nerds

>on youtube

>on QI videos

The irony in this comment is so thick you could pour it over waffles for maple flavour.

[xakatski]

@DashTTG the truth hurts doesn't it.

you dont have to be a nerd to comment on youtube.

you dont have to be a nerd to watch QI

so sorry i dont see the irony, i just see some angry nerd, hurting over the truth

[PhoenixPlaneswalker]

@xakatski It's called a joke....

[IcEye89]

The gene-pool needs a little chlorine has to be one of the - admittedly there are loads of them - great quotes from QI.

In my opinion, one of the greatest.

[redhorserainbow]

@xakatski You're talking shit mate. If Stephen Fry says that Pakistanis worship Des Lynam, then it's 100% true.

[joel8lyric]

@xakatski

It was a joke about Des Lynam, dimwit.

[Konfolino]

@xakatski It's a comedy show you knob. Des Lynam is no god anywhere lol.

[xakatski]

@Konfolino your the knob, its not a comedy show. its entertainment. check it under the bbc iplayer categories.

[ferret205]

@xakatski Just face it, you missed the joke and then you were a cock about it. Live and learn.

[SmoshkliandZubble]

@xakatski Is comedy not considered a form of entertainment? xD

[Mayna00]

Am from Pakistan. Love how shocked everyone looks at the idea of kite flying being dangerous!

Also, hearing STEPHEN FREAKIN' FRY say Basant (in Urdu) .. best moment of my sad sad life!

[pianor91]

@xakatski I also think he was making a joke that Des Lynham was a god in Pakistan.

[pianor91]

@xakatski I don't think Stephen produces the show and put the pictures up himself.

[xakatski]

@gloomyoutlook joe brand effered to the picture as being des lynem therefore fry is aying the picture is a god in pakistan

[Muloc7253]

@xakatski allah isn't a god you daft prick

[Konfolino]

@xakatski Genres: Comedy | Game-Show (via imdb)

[OMacGyverO]

I wanted to be a doctor. Look everybody! Oh what's the point... XD

[TheBurkissWay]

@xakatski It was a joke in response to the preceding gag. "[Des Lynam] is a god in Pakistan..."

[Dagvalda]

sean lock was on fire this episode

[fruitcakegirl]

@xakatski Sarcasm! 

[2pacsrevenge]

I'm sorry did stephen just imply (in the end of part 1) that Pakistan is in-between Iraq and Afghanistan?

[griswoldthegrey]

It was a "tourist promotion". They also set fire to the schooner. The crowd in attendance? "With a crowd estimated at 15,000, the ship was released into the currents of the upper Niagara River on September 8th 1827"

Nasty.

[griswoldthegrey]

A Canadian hotel owner set up the schooner with animals --aided by two other hotel owners, a second Canadian and  an American. If you want details, google "Niagara Falls animals in ship".

[DelorienAz]

"Died in a bed of diabtetes" ROFL

[SoylentGreeeen]

What the fuck is wrong with people? A ship full of animals? Why?!

[southsydney]

@SoylentGreeeen because it's hilarious

[youngfreak32]

@SoylentGreeeen : I guess people in those days didn't think about animal rights as much as we do now.

[charizardisbeastly]

hahahahahahaha two bears crawled out and they were shot. 5:48

[robotracking]

Bush, a cheerleader, now it all makes sense

[666FrankBooth666]

9:00 "What an arse!" hahaha

[silentgreytiger]

that baloon guy didn't die, and by god, it's the only darwin award nominee i'm very tempted to copy the actions of ^^

[croutonfada]

@silentgreytiger As long as you YouTube it I'll fully support you.

[Blink182DudeRanch]

a very funny episode, sean lock is brilliant

[SabraMagdalena]

Christ, who would do that to all those animals!

[robotracking]

@SabraMagdalena .........Americans. I mean they did much worse things to the fello human being, did they not. Not these days.............we hope.

[SabraMagdalena]

@robotracking Well, I assumed it was Americans to begin with. But besides that, what kind of person thinks sailing a ship full of animals off Niagara Falls is a good Idea? What's the best possible outcome?

[firegrace2008]

Basant Panchami is a Hindu festival and woukd NOT be celebrated in Pakistan.Who does his research???

[Slaangor]

yeah, cuz there are no hindus whatsoever in whole paki

[aniruddhahar]

@firegrace2008 I think he means baisakhi, which is celebrated under different names in both india and pakistan.

[scramignon]

That thing with the kites.... putting glass in the line to cut the other lines is a VERY common practice in Brazil. All the kids usually do even being illegal.

[tearawreck]

@nvempala Blame the researchers lol

[unijade]

@nvempala Sweety, come to Pakistan and get your facts corrected. You have no idea what a menace the festival is in Pakistan because of the very reasons Stephen mentioned!

[nvempala]

@unijade ...first of all....I am NOT ur sweety!,,,,,learn how to talk with respect....and u have no idea what a menace u are to the whole world!

[TheHighlandSnail]

You know... I think "Go Nads" is probably the cleverest thing I've heard of that came out of Bush's mouth.

[WrongHeaded07]

Or the pretzel. Shoud've finished the job, though.

[TheHighlandSnail]

Ah yes, the kamikaze pretzel. You know you're not doing your job when even snack food tries to assassinate you for the good of the nation...

[grahamkeithtodd]

@TheHighlandSnail a somewhat disterbing image methinks lol

[mooneepondskid]

The gene pool needs a little chlorine...lol.

[ihply0106]

Stephen's never heard of the Darwin awards??

[Ischi71]

I'm shocked too. How can this be? Actually I seem to remember that Alan mentioned them way back.

[ihply0106]

Did he really? I missed that.