Beware of Your Blind Spots

[cathavenfostermom1]

Jesus said, " don't try to remove the speck from your brothers eye

when there is a timber in your own eye.

[12blin]

oh man.I have a problem with myself being defensive.I hate it when Im being that way.ugh..I wanna change that.I will!

[vagabondsteve]

Thank you for your honesty. It helps to observe and not resist or beat oneself up when we become defensive. Awareness is the key. I appreciate your comments.

[jigme800]

I just saw this video and I loved it. You always have a great outlook on things. Thanks.

[vagabondsteve]

Thank you for your support!

[TheBlessedHope]

That was an excellent talk. The light I believe you're talking about is Christ. In his light we see all our darkness.

[TadRapidly]

Thanks Steve. One clarifying point about knowing "what is good for me...". What was good for me was being unconscious for 43.5 years; it was just what I "needed" to wake up. And when it finally happened it was staggering! I feel blessed that it only took 44 years! Love, Andrew

[TadRapidly]

I like what you're saying, brother, BUT...If asked, most people are going to point to one's temperament or other "personality" traits that need "improving". I don't need that from anyone. If I act like a judgmental asshole toward someone I can feel it immediately and I know that it feels like shit. I think everyone should be left alone. if I ask my Mother what she thinks, she'll just say "I think you should find a wife"! ;-) Hugely valuable input, eh?

Love you, Steve.

Andrew

[vagabondsteve]

Great point Andrew! Unfortunately many take a black or white approach to this issue. I prefer the gray area. Using my intuition I know when it is best to speak truth from the heart. I also no when to not waste my time with people who are not receptive or have differing values from myself. Regarding feedback from others; I encourage those who "get me" to be honest while discourage those who want to change me into a white sheep.

[TadRapidly]

For me, Projection is EVERYTHING. In that light, nobody really "gets" me (and I don't "get" them). They just project their own experience onto me and all I can do is the same. Yes, speak from the heart when inclined but it is just all projection, bro! We could say the sentence starting with "He would be better off if..." is projection. There is no way to know what is best for others (or ourselves for that matter!). Love you, Steve! Andrew

[vagabondsteve]

Agreed it is all projection & opinions. For me this doesn't mean advice/constructive criticism can not still be of great value. "There is no way to know what is best for others (or ourselves for that matter!)" Really??? So what do you base your actions on? If a loved one was contemplating suicide would you tell them nothing because you don't know what is best for them?

[TadRapidly]

Thats a tough one, Steve. You are quite the task-master, I must say!...My brother has relapsed about 1000 times with his cocaine addiction. you could call that suicide. When he calls and sounds desperate I tell him "you're going to be just fine" and I mean it. He IS going to be just fine. With awakening comes "true faith" and that faith is incredible!. BTW-he is currently clean and he sounds better than ever. :-) keep up the good work, brother.

[vagabondsteve]

Thanks for the dialogue. Glad your brother is going to be just fine. Appreciate your encouragement!

[Lidosh]

It's interesting to hear you mention the Dale Carnegie books especially since I've read it twice over the years. I never thought of "fragile egos" as the reason why this book is popular but I see it all very clearly. If we didn't care so much about other peoples approval, we wouldn't need a 3 step strategy on how to speak truthfully with one another. It's time to check mine....again... and be radically honest with myself so I can free others to be the same with me. As always, great video.

Tony

[vagabondsteve]

Thanks for your comment Tony. Sadly there are entire industries built upon how to 'successfully' walk on thin ice when speaking to all the fragile egos. There are very few books on how to wean ourselves from the teat of approval.

[piggijiggi]

Steve, your ability to see through the veil is remarkable. I am subscribing to your videos!

[vagabondsteve]

Thank you for your support!

[riveter412]

Not everyone wants BRUTUAL honesty. I would never give constructive critism on a date unless I felt like it. Not everyone wants to hear their faults unless it asked for and only from someone that they trust. Not from a stranger.

[vagabondsteve]

Do you want it? This videos focus was not to encourage people to give "BRUTAL" honesty but to be more receptive in receiving it. It's interesting how you label it BRUTAL; I prefer to call it "radical" or "refreshing" honesty. We live in such a false world that being honest conjures such a negative connotation.

[riveter412]

Okay. My tongue is sticking out at you. You just can't see it. lol

[irulez333]

yes thts very true.Independant of others approval to feed ur selfworth is such a freedom. often we fall into its trap...and yes being non-defensive should help.But, the society usually consider u as WEAK if u don't defend urself...nonetheless it is a grt tool i guess.grt topic. wish u spoke more about it.

[vagabondsteve]

T.Y. for your comment & encouragement. My experience has been the opposite; WEAK (insecure) people are hyper defensive. STRONG people have an inner confidence which needs no defense.

[misseptember]

Isn't growing just to grow also ego..? To look, feel better, compared to others?

[vagabondsteve]

People in spiritual circles obsess upon ego/no-ego. Ego is not the enemy. Trees, animals, grass & babies grow. I choose to grow spiritually to explore the depths & joy of being human. It is an inner journey and not about feeling, looking better than others.

[danger0usknowledge]

Exactly, I can weaken my ego but i

probably won't be able to get away from it.

The secret is to witness it in action

w/o the commentary which I can't do.

Self criticism is ego, not doing so is also

ego, criticising others is ego, everything

is ego and not ego is ego. There is no

way out which is the way out.

[vagabondsteve]

Beautiful stated! Thank you for exquisitely articulating the madness of ego obsession.

[yeah10000000000000]

hey, cheak out what's going on in canada right! youtube : BILL C-51

is this going on in the U.S

[yeah10000000000000]

thanks man , great video

I've got some issues going on right now and every time I watch one of your video's it brings me back to balance for a bit.

thanks

[vagabondsteve]

Thank you for your support! Reading comments like yours encourages me to continue making videos.

[danger0usknowledge]

You are lucky you got the text message.

You would never get that in person or even

verbally over the phone. In order to be in anyway honest in a negative way some ppl

can only resort to being nasty. It's like

'OK, you want it...here it is right

between the eyes' kind of thing.

[vagabondsteve]

So true! People have such difficulty being radically honest. Children are naturally radically honest; only to have adults condition it right out of them. "You can't say that Johnny, it's rude."

[SherBB]

bravo

[cosmanthony21]

Ill say that again, I am well rounding..

[DouglasUrantia]

Cool vlong Steve........but

You went on a date with some girl and she didn't want a second date? What the hell! What's up with her? She's probably on the road to becoming a nun. Secondly, hey she really gave you a lot of in-depth feedback. LOL "Different wave-length". You already knew that.

Douglas......joining the monestary.

[vagabondsteve]

Yep, I already knew it. Do women with spiritual, emotional, & intellectual depth exist?

[DouglasUrantia]

Yes, Steve, such women do exist. But they may not be into guys that look like you . You look like a model out of a male fashion magazine. You probably already know that also. Maybe try ladies with no spiritual depth and then you could be their guru. Seriously. [PS: thanks for your reply.]

[riveter412]

Yes. They do but you have to get to know them first. Not force your way of doing things on them.