Let's Watch Battletoads I

[MrYona17]

"Turn the car on"

"Turn the car on"

"Let's make some Turducken"

[spybloom]

LET'S GET HORNY!!!

[loneshewolf74]

Hilariously bad even for a video-game-based cartoon, and I've seen the old Donkey Kong from Saturday Supercade. XD

[MrFluffyRedGyarados]

@loneshewolf74 No... Nothing can be worse than that Donkey Kong show. Not even this.

[zlordzyxxyz]

A couple seconds in and I burst out laughing from the first joke. xD

[Ledundeadv66]

1:51

The Great and Powerful Trixie.

[seamusfan18]

It scared me when he made the duck sound

[Aizen9]

00:51

Hey, wait a minute, what the fuck!? This is the music from AoSTH, why are there two cartoons with the same music, which one came later and stole the music from the other? This for some reason feels like it came after AoSTH, how did they not get sued?

[MetalgutsJ]

I have this on VHS.

I found it at a Dollar General.

[DarPower1]

Um, wait Junior High? They're Jr. High schoolers!? Are you shitting me!?

[musicmanz15]

Wise wrote for Batman and Transformers? The man who wrote for Batman the animated series couldn't think of a better line than "Let's get warty."?

[tkemert20]

@musicmanz15 He even wrote Optimus's origin story. -_-

[zatoichiyojimbo24]

Cough...toadstool.....cough...­ahem... Slight cold

[TackyRackyComixNEO]

6:46 - I swear, that's a surf rock version of "Hava Nagila".

[kffeine]

@TackyRackyComixNEO Someone other than me realized that... feels jewish man.

[TackyRackyComixNEO]

@kffeine The funny thing is, I'm not even Jewish and I realized that XD

[IArtGod]

...... You're bored, aren't you?

[HisEmptyHouse]

holy shit

[BluBoulzor]

I know a guy named Liorana on youtube who finished Battletoads in one sitting.

It is said that he was one of the Russian child that were supposed to beat this game during the cold war. Probably only a rumor.

Woah the princess is actually hot in the cartoon ! Dark Queen is also hot as usual.

[popledude]

Didn't wise make the music for DKC?

[Verminator4]

The "Genetic essence?" So they sealed up a tomb to hide away a jar of frog spunk?

[CAFlNATOR]

I like how if you go to Retsupurae's profile, set the video list to rows instead of the hybrid video/preview thing that's on by default, the thumbnails for both this and the next part appear to have the two characters staring at each other.

[videogamenostalgia]

I swear to God 'Let's get warty' sounds EXACTLY like 'Let's get horny' the way they pronounce it...

[jong4tv]

Some-times thought you sound like Spoonyone. 

[cybernerd129]

If the princess has a teleporter why do they need a spaceship?

[TheFryBoy1]

Watching this makes me think how much funnier it would have been if slowbeef was a part of the commentary too

[DorianCairne]

@TheFryBoy1 No, no; Slowbeef's great when they're doing impromptu commentary and bouncing jokes off each other, but when it comes to scripted commentary like this, I think Diabeetus is best on his own.

[DanieluYoshikoto]

did she is rrr ?

[2011mrkingofkings]

Some of the characters were voiced by some familiar actors from other cartoons like "Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog" including Ian James Corlett.

[DoubleA2015]

Diabetus, you are $&@%ing hilarious!

[kffeine]

I'd love to fuck the Dark Queen until her uterus starts bleeding.

[Djinnfest]

AGH

I don't even want to watch the second one... but i have to.

[DorianCairne]

Okay, pause at 3:50 and look at that fucked-up "earth". Is this dumb thing set in some distant future where Asia floated a couple miles south and melted a bit?

Wow, can't believe I found a flaw in this masterpiece of a cartoon.

[Goldbloodeddragon]

Thumbs up if LP Archive brought you here.

[Mr9jack9]

Fun Fact: The writer David Wise Won an Emmy, for writing.

[Goldbloodeddragon]

"I can organize pants by how blue they are"

Diabetus, you need to do voice acting professionally. I'm not even kidding.

[TackyRackyComixNEO]

I swear, part of that fight music was a surf rock version of "Hava Nagila".

[ILIKECEREALX]

"[David Wise] was wise enough to never write anything ever again."

Funny you should mention that; he actually had a decent career in writing cartoons. His credits include Star Trek: The Animated Series, He-Man, Transformers, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and even Batman: The Animated Series. I'd say that he improved quite a bit after this disaster.

[speedingtime]

"Don't forget to bring your companion cube!"

[TheToast7]

Hit 1 for fun!

[steveharley0345]

7:04

Hey guys, you wanna play basketball?

Yeah, su-

I- I- I-...I don't mean.. 'real' basketball...

[TheLetsRead]

But Wise won an Emmy... for Star Trek: The Animated Series.

[MalamiteLtd]

Turn the car on. Make some Turducken.

Awesome.



[CMOODO]

David wise = My religion

[WVI]

My reaction to the first couple seconds of this video: "Wait. Waitwaitwaitwaitwait. DAVID WISE?"

One Wikipedia search later...Turns out they're different guys.

[Shadow78954]

actually, i believe that school's computer budget is

5000 yen.

cause that"s not alot of money.

[kissfan7]

This guy is pretty damn funny. Way too funny to be just on YouTube.

But god, this show sucked.

[TheToast7]

@kissfan7 He's not just on youtube, he also makes LPs at the somethingawful forums, but he makes less lately.

[luvtehcomix]

"that sign is the ugliest thing i've ever seen"

yeah and that sign that says "yeah team" is so much better.

[jellywillreturn]

Oh Slowbeef and Diabetus, save us from this show.

[GameShark9000]

One can't help but wonder why "PSYCHOTRONIC" didn't took off.

[EdmacZ]

Cosmically Cosmic!

Diabetus: "Universally...planetary!"

Intergalactically...Nebulous!

[steveharley0345]

Holy shit.. its... its the 3 kids.. Musclebomber2021, BillyMC and ActionBastard...

O___O

[EponymousKid]

I can't believe I'm recognizing voices in this, uh, show. The Dark Empress is Kathleen Barr - Dot from Reboot, Evil-Lyn from the 2002 He-Man. Scott McNeil is, like, all of the henchmen, and is probably best known for either Wolverine in X-Men Evolution or Koga from Inuyasha.

I mean, dang, when did this come out, seriously?

[MidnightMidna]

PSYCHOTRONIC!

[stellybellyboo]

All arcades run by black men have watermelons.

[vampirekoopa]

wtf?!

[helldog124]

Battletoads

[EATshitanddrinkbleac]

I refuse to believe that human hands produced this

[EponymousKid]

So is Diabetus just a really huge fan of Battletoads? He did a freaking insane LP of both the original game and the sequel, then this...

He also seems to just like saying the word "Battletoads", though I can totally see where he's coming from with that.

[TheToast7]

@EponymousKid He's either a huge Battletoads fan or a huge Battletoads hater. You can't really tell with him. And that's why we love him.

[Seth2378]

I installed Daikatana and my computer did that

[fnatsy]

I always figured it was "let's get horny!" You know, cause they're toads, like horny toads.

[TheRollFizzlebeef]

1:47 I see what you did thar.

[psycotigerman]

Hmm what flavor of ice cream is the dark queen....Syphilis?Leather...sy­philis and leather?

[90sHeroMAXD]

Poor David Wise. What happened to you

[ObiTrev]

3:25 Yeah that dosen't look phallic in any way.

[xtrastage]

No mention of Hava Nagila?

[DucksInMayonnaise]

I mean... what remains in life for you if you fail at putting jelly doughnuts in a box !?

[Lastpatriot]

At 6:47, does he say "superhero shitty"?

[GoRedskinsAndWizards]

@Lastpatriot No, he says "superhero city."

[Pooky1991]

TV tropes...wait...I've already seen this Resupurae vid.

[therealhomor]

FLASH FACT: David Wise was a writer on the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon.

[SpotxSpot]

5000 pesos wouldn't buy you one computer...

[Zomgareyouserious]

I'm sorry, but I don't think that even retsupurae's witty commentary can make this pile of crap any better. I don't know if I can even stomach the second part.

[bobbyewing311]

rofl Companion Cube reference :) PSYCHOTRONIC!!!!!!!!

[Demonicor]

Shakeoronic? Pigoids? Disgustomatic? Psychotronic? Cosmorific? Who the fuck writes shit like this? Oh, right, that would be David Wise. Ironic, isn't it?

[SugoiSugar]

:40 Did she just pronounce it "Luna-verse?"

[drvince0426]

I'm going to change my name to Ringo Cake

[Xp710]

lol this was the only ep ever made

[PEZhead5432109876]

TURDUCKEN!!!!!!!!

[SEGPED]

7:45

I C WAT U DID THAR

[MedicineMelanch0ly]

Why were the evil queens/witches always so much hotter than the good princesses?

I think it comes from the old Disney/Conservative thing of demonising sex appeal... also black hair = EVIL.

[Jetblast01]

Who else thought the Dark Queen should've taken the princess during the store scene?

[MarkC18]

6:26

Ah, poorly drawn lesbianism.

[MegaBlargle]

At 9:51, it was obvious that he wanted to be the first customer of the princess' "career." T-Bird wanted to be the one to "serve" him.

GAWD, there's so many ways to misinterpret this.

[PenguinFated]

Anyone notice the Win sign at 1:55, like where it's pointing? XD

[Kablam5]

The Totally Radical physicially hurts my head.

[BabbyPyro]

this is MST3K quality, but Slowbeef needs to be Crow.

[AcceleratingUniverse]

LET'S GET HORNY~!

[ROGUEDETAIL]

oh God the sexual innuendoes are insane!

[wooduu]

Is that some Attackfrogs?

[TheBreadBoxer]

Lol another great vid guys but srsly Diabetus 5000 pesos isnt alot of money

[UndefeatableTwilight]

@TheBreadBoxer That's the joke.

[TheBreadBoxer]

@UndefeatableTwilight You clearly do not remember The Worst Retsupurae Ever, friend.

[smnoy23]

MY EYES! THE ANIMATION!

[EmperorChupacabra]

Thumbs up if TVTropes led you here.

[EmperorChupacabra]

It sounds like they're saying "Let's get horny!"

[xxBigBlack09xx]

diabetus should do voice acting

[stimmedtank]

dude life is definitely one big basketball game

[MidnightMidna]

David Wise should probably just stick to composing.

[Luffyrulz09]

What universe created this?

[Scorpiondesu]

T..TITS!?

[rjakobi]

I cannot bear myself to watch the video. I can only stand to listen to the audio. It's...THAT PAINFUL.

[SuperNintendofreak1]

wow I never knew battletoad were just humans

[DenOfVipers]

Each gag in the first three minutes ends with a main character having his chosen medium fall on his head. Every joke is a throwaway that anyone could write in their sleep. I reiterate; how is this ANY better than what we have today?

[WittingStudios]

@DenOfVipers It's better then that shit show Johnny Test.

[lich109]

still better than stuff kids watch today, on another note, words cannot express how awesome that arcade manager is, all kinds of stuff happening around him, yet he just reads on, and doesn't care. Somehow I think a cartoon about his regular life would be more entertaining.

[DenOfVipers]

@lich109 How is this in any way better? People keep saying that on this thread and it makes no sense whatsoever.

[EmperorChupacabra]

@DenOfVipers I'd say it's equal to modern cartoons.

[lich109]

@DenOfVipers I like almost everything where effort was put to use, and they tried to go for more than relying on nothing but slapstick comedy.

[Snyperwolf91]

maybe its worse against the original game series but its still better than the shit today on TV . i love battletoads and i like the cartoon somehow . i think this is better than the mortal kombat cartoon.=P

[MarkC18]

Wow, Scott Menville, Kath Soucie, Scott McNeil and rest probably had a hard time dealing with this.

[frankenvonvogler]

turn the car on

turn the car on

make some turducken

[RobloxLegomania]

I may be a perv, but I seriously had to do a double take every time it sounded like they said

"LETS GET HORNY!"

[Tigcat2]

Hahah, "LET'S GET WARTY!" "LET'S FIX THE LAUNDRY!" Epic.

[Jeffreymetalz91]

PAC MAN THE ANIME THE ARCADE

[ScReWaTtAcKeD]

5:11 "FIND ME SOME BIRD SEED"

[runnerbelow]

"Well, he's a shoe-in for the Toronto Raptors" I'm from Toronto and that made me laugh like crazy.

[ScReWaTtAcKeD]

2:38 John Romero is going to make you his bitch!... off eBay.

[blahblahblah7679]

6:19........surprise buttsecks?

[FoolyCoolyMabase]

...but Pimple wasn't in Battletoads 1, he got kidnapped by the Dark Queen as well...

[cyborgtroy]

You never mentioned that he's holding a jar of "genetic essence"

[p3ngu1n48]

sometimes, you dont need slowbeef's awesomeness to make a retsupurae funny.

(was this recorded on a tv with a camcorder?)

[Strawberrycock309]

@p3ngu1n48

More likely the only copy left is a VHS

[MrMMO97]

LOL

LETS GET  HORNY

[Seantendo]

David Wise?! THE David Wise?! The guy who did the music for the original Battletoads and the Donkey Kong Country series?! ...I refuse to believe he wrote this garbage.

[thapoint09]

Maybe that's why he went into music.

[nintendonut888]

@Seantendo Thankfully, this is a different David Wise.

[ZoomingDakota]

@Seantendo Maybe he made it bad becuase he knew there was no way the idea could work, or maybe he didn't WANT a cartoon of it. It seems really unnecessary.

[bludeborne]

you forgot to wear PANTS TODAY!

[KingZolem]

Wait, if we're so insignifigant, why are you looking for help on our planet?

[weasellope]

I can only imagine that if this show had more episodes the Battletoads would use their powers to win "The Big Game".

[WilliamLongfellow]

Funnily, the David Wise that wrote this script is different from the one who composed for the Battletoads game (more famous for the Donkey Kong Country series soundtracks).

[pyramidheadkitten9]

so guys, this, or mega man?

[spreegrl98]

this is the funniest thing ive seen on youtube!

[leothelion19]

bud wiese ar

[SergeantLuke]

Is that the same David Wise who is a music composer for Rare? It would make sense, since Rare developed the games.

[SenseiLeRoof]

He's right. They need scientific genius to NOT HAVE A PINK CAR.

[pacific14586]

The scream at 2:04 needs to repeat forever.

[DrButler]

Wait we can be Combat inclined amphibians AND 80's So-Cal faggots!?!?!? TOTALLY GNARLIDACIOUS

[DarkMage2X]

Is that, "Let's Get Horny" or "Let's Get Warty"? It could go either way..

[Headbanger142]

"Let's get horny"?

Oh my Lord....

[KeikaStrife]

2:56 sound effect... I'm fucking CRYING I'm laughing so hard! The moment I'm like, "okay, okay, that was good... I can stop... laughi... BAHAHAHAAA."

Oh man... there aren't enough stars on youtube for this. xD

[NaruIno4ever123]

UNIVERSALLY..PLANETARY.

I lmao so much at this XD

[CaptainTinTyrant]

@ 2:33 he was actually about to LP battletoads

[Elementa2006]

00:04 Not really since David Wise went on to write for shows like Batman TAS (one of them being The Clock King episode) and Chip 'N' Dale Rescue Rangers.

[Cocklaunch]

google ftw

[rayraygottago]

i...i had this videotape

[8MKWeb8]

Their computer budget was 5,000. Pesos..

[overkill78]

The Donkeylips reference made me lose it.

[Scarfs123]

She's going to Town on that Fudgecicle

[Zeroflare21]

..Are they saying "let's get Horny"? Really?

That must be like Let's Playing, but in the 90s.

[FluffyLovesSpyro2]

Don't forget your companion cube! :D Or your cake!

@coolguy42188

Yes he is. :/

[12Hamanhaingen]

LET'S!

GET!

WAAARTYYY!!!!!!

[arkmalfius]

PsychoTRONIC!

[Chief889]

Best. Word. Ever.

[MSkull01]

FUCKING AWESOME!

[sonicfeet]

Even that trio's FUCKING SCHOOL PRINCIPAL CALLED THEM LOSERS.

Who the fuck is nasty enough to do this in real life??

[coolguy42188]

Isn't David Wise the guy who makes the music for the Donkey Kong Country games?

[sonicfeet]

This is a different one.

[AidenLS]

blank paper that that dude binded together

[AidenLS]

hes a shoe in for the toronto raptors LOL  love it

[0rionBTL]

Yes, Diabeetus. I DO want to play Duck Hunt.

[Akindigrocks2]

this makes me want to bore into my skull with a 15'' drill

[Falcovsleon21]

"Life is one big basketball game."

Yeah I had the same reaction to that line. Are these guys stereotypical californian residents or stoner hippies?

[SBaby]

1:03 - Making you perfect candidates to become the next Power Rangers.