To Jerre, aka: NightVisionPhantom (Strictly For Jerre)

[RTRVII]

PLZ ANYONE WHAT HAPPENED TO THE NIGHT VISION PHANTOM??

[grungeface87]

Great words Nathan, definitely struck a chord with me too. I only wish I had the temperament to use video as an outlet (and a camera would be useful too...).

I've only recently subscribed to you Nathan, but your words have already proved to be thought provoking and wise. I hope you'll be around on here for time to come!

Also, I enjoyed the background music!

[nathanforst1]

Thank you! :D

I use my other channel, NathanForst, as my primary channel now.

[TruZer0]

That background music was good although it did get a bit loud at one point. What's the name of the song and the artist?

[slackero666]

Your words were powerful enough on their own, you didn't need to add the annoying music in the background.

[Chimpdecheese]

Nathan..thanks.

[generalbuttnugget]

Such a meaningful video, this is the most contemplative and solemn I have felt in years. Thank you.

[nathanforst1]

You are most welcome.

[lololeela]

What do you think it is you said or did to scare her off?

[nathanforst1]

LoL

I already thoroughly embarrassed myself in front of her and the entire bar. Do I really have to say? LoL!

[lololeela]

No. Sorry. I was watching the video for the second time and forgot that you later said that you wound up having to move away from the place, so it must have been embarrassing.

By the way, do you ever do poetry reading at public places? I'm guessing not because there would be people there., but just wanted to let you know you are good at it . Not that I know anything about poetry, but I enjoy your readings.

[nathanforst1]

No, I did not move away from here. I am still here. I moved away from somewhere else to come here.

I thank you for your encouragement. No, I do not recite poetry in public. There aren't any places near me that I could actually do anything like that. That is what I use YouTube for.

[pzkane]

Good video.

[headunitdisplay]

glad we didnt lose you brother. You outta become an actor, you have that "look"

[tobyeo]

Stranger Than Fiction

[codexbiohazard]

"Now time for something completely different" ! Oh my lordy.....is Nathan Noah Antwiler's long lost brother!?

[Skjegget]

You would definatly not take ur life as a christian either, cause christians thinks suicide brings people to hell

[nathanforst1]

That is a very catholic idea. I have met a lot of protestants who think that suicide - if you are a christian - will still get you into heaven.

That's the thing with religion, mate. It can be interpreted 1000 different ways from sunday.

[ClingingMars]

The issue of suicide in Christianity in general is very touchy. I personally believe that from the Scriptures the only sin that will keep you from heaven is blasphemy of the Holy Spirit.

[LogicalSanity]

I don't think the music was needed, but yea I'm anti social in a way. Most of my friends approached me when I was drawing or doing something I was talented at. I guess that's how I reach out to people: Artistically, not verbally.

I was extremely unhappy as a christian;depressed almost. I came to the realization that there is no invisible man watching or caring, so I had to go through life on my own. Knowing that it was me and only me helped, even if there are many bumps here and there.

-♥♥

[nathanforst1]

Needed? No. But if I am going to make a long video, I want my subs to have a mildly pleasant experience. If I can get my point across at the same time, great!

[LogicalSanity]

Haha, I understand. I just think the story would have been great on its own. :)

[5ockpuppet5fromhe11]

Nathan, you are in the group of what's known in psychology as "the rationals." It's an honor as much as a curse. There is truth in the maxim that ignorance is bliss.

[nathanforst1]

Yeah, I understand that ignorance can be bliss. I just don't see how anyone can approach life with that attitude. Is it not better to know what the Universe is like truthfully, rather than lie to oneself?

Thanks for the comment, 5ockpuppet5fromhe11.

[5ockpuppet5fromhe11]

I sent you a PM that you may or may not wish to explore further, but I'm betting you will because I've already bet on you being a "rational."

[redhairedcutiex3]

I have alot of empathy for you because I have social anxiety disorder. When I was younger, people attributed it to shyness, but it is so bad sometimes now I am an adult. Even when I do gain confidence, one event happens that just shatters it all.

[TheAwedCouple]

Great video, Nathan! I hope you are able to deal with your issues as well.

[MeaganHen]

This made me sad....Fuck small towns! You're cool as hell!

[Chriskct]

I wish my speaking voice was as good as yours. The Books On Tape people would hire you. Good advice for Jerre. Whether he agrees or not, I'm sure he feels good that someone tried to help him.

[nathanforst1]

Thanks, chris.

I am trying to upload two vids tonight. They are taking a very long time. My internet is horrible.

Thank you for the compliment!

[stephanieco28]

I am happy, I am blessed, except for that moment when I stub my toe. Happiness is an internal choice. Fact is, I dont like most people and most people dont like me. Thats okay, mutually beneficial. I love my family, I have a best friend. Thats it. My happiness comes from the outdoors, animals, sunsets, good novels, sci-fi movies, rock music and singing (I sing best when alone). LOL sounds like a personal ad. Anyway, be happy with yourself, screw anybody who doesnt agree.

[FloodTheStreets]

this has nothing to do with anything you mentioned in the video but you look like buffalo bill from silence of the lambs. :x that's why i clicked this. but then i realised that i can actually relate to what you're saying so i'm glad i watched this, thank you.

[nathanforst1]

ROFLMAO!

[OctaviaW]

Having social anxiety makes life so very difficult. You have to make the choice to trust & reach out. You get hurt, withdraw. Then you do it all over again.... One of the reasons why I usually prefer to be under my rock.

[HonestDiscussioner]

Well said. I had breif exchange with Jerry, and while I doubt our religious and political beliefs will ever be reconciled I hope the best for him.

Though technically if you believed in religion and killed yourself you'd have to think you'd go to hell. Either way I'm glad you didn't. Many great men and women have contemplated suicide only to go on to great things, though of course I understand there is no guarentee in such matters.

[abaddon5]

Great video, man.

[macwild1234]

go to a fucking rock concert

[nathanforst1]

LMAO

[laxguy22655]

you know i was kinda like you in highschool other then school sports and work i never really interacted with people outside of school sure i had friends kinda but not really. it wasn't until i went into the army where pretty much your forced to interact with people daily. i had a buddy that dragged me out of my room so many nights and get me plastered drunk and had alot of fun and i came to the realization that i liked who i was but now i am back in virginia and well i kinda went back

[Singebuggercat]

Thx dude.

[maskedmalfrey]

Applause, a very brave video.

[AnethSvartalf]

Is it possible you could find a support group in your area? I know in big cities, you could find such a thing, but in a little town such things can be difficult to find.

[nathanforst1]

I don't need support. Thanks for the comment, though! ;)

:p

In all seriousness, the thought of attending any such event would most likely make me nervous as all hell.

[NitaBMe]

I love this video, and I can't help but feel that we would get along very well. I have that same social anxiety; my skin crawls when I think about attending social gatherings, even small ones. Everyone making small talk, it's all so uncomfortable and fake feeling, uugghh.

I try though, because I have found my life's purpose. I just don't know where to put it yet.

[nathanforst1]

Thank you for the comment and kind words, NitaBMe. Yeah, my job requires me to be around people but in my personal life, I refuse. I don't like it. Can't stand it. Won't take it.

... I pulled a Cenk Ungar. I don't know if you watch the Young Turks or not. He is a pretty funny guy. If you don't, then you'll ahve no idea what I'm talking about.

[laxguy22655]

i have a few friends one actually and one i hang out with from time to time but no one really to hang out with. so i feel you on that but you know if your ever in virginia dc or maryland hit me up man. we could probably scare each other.

[darkmojojojo]

I can understand how you feel. I've gone through some similar things and it's always been hard to deal with it. There is one person I feel betrayed by and it's always hard to talk to her. Even though I've realized it wasn't directly her fault, I still can't bring myself to trust people because of one single action. I've always had that problem but the event just seemed to make it worse.

[TurkishPoltergeist69]

Like I said before (and I'm not recommending this by any means!) Drugs opened up my mind. Sucks, I know...But it is even then that you realize that most of the people you know are...well..pieces of shit. I can talk to anyone now, but yes, most people are selfishly motivated..so really, not much has changed. I can have intellectual conversations with some people but no social life to speak of (more so by choice now). So, to avoid awkwardness anywhere, I use humor, something we can all identify w/

[happyjesus123]

I find social situations a lot easier if I can find something useful to do. Getting involved in the organization of conference or helping out at a non-profit for example.

[UnknownRex]

I agree. A common interest unites easier then random people you meet.

[Jizuschrist]

Yeah, I can relate to being socially awkward and aloof, I do feel uncomfortable in large gatherings. As for depression , I am still breaking out from what I consider a "dark age" in my life.

And thou wilt give thyself relief, if thou doest every act of thy life as if it were the last.

Marcus Aurelius ~

[CoolAtheist]

Great and honest vid nathan. And trust me, you're not anti social, that's something completely different.

More like some form of social fobia.

Nothing to be ashamed of, lot of people have that. take care man.

[MelCartman]

It is often very hard to find friends for people with high iq and intellectual knowledge.

[Plasmon19]

I sympathize with you.

I find that the way in which I speak to the people around me, my siblings and friends about the cosmos has made a positive influence, and that gives me meaning. I love talking about things within and beyond the earth. But I have also become an icon of such, and people dont understand nor wish to know me any better. In that way I live in my own mind...my own world alone.

[2bsirius]

I don't know how small your town is...Or if there's a larger place near by...BUT what about beginning a book club or a philosophy discussion group?...Joining a Meetup group is good...IF it has a focus that you care about...Life isn't fair...and it's difficult to make contacts....

I know my advice makes me sound like I think I'm the activity director on the Titanic...But I guess I would rather just try SOMETHING real & concrete. Might as well start bailing even if the boat is going to sink.

5*s

[WhiskeySlim]

The activity director on the Titanic? You really have a way with words, Sister.

[FlowCell]

You need to figure out how to be a friend to others without letting yourself become vulnerable until you know you can trust somebody with your vulnerability. Being a friend doesn't mean being an open book, or a door mat.

[Solarees]

Loves, Hugs and Kisses Nathan.

[nathanforst1]

Thanks.

Now go over to Jerre's channel and give him him some 'extra loving care.' He needs it.

[VonSchnutze]

You make some of the most honest videos I've seen. We are quite similar.

[TheBigHo111]

the music was a nice touch. I have gove through a serious 2 year stretch but came out a hell of lot better than before. Life can be a mutha! *****

[simonodell]

marijuana solved that problem for me.

[Atheistprimate]

Tried to leave Jerri a friendly message but he has me blocked still from about a year ago.

Still 5 stared his video since its clear the man is suffering a really rough patch in his life.

[happyjesus123]

Yes, BigJerre has block me too. He has more people on his block list than he has subscribers. Poor guy is having some serious problems in his life. A lot of it is self inflicted but that doesn't make the pain any less real.

[Atheistprimate]

At least he knows the trouble is something he needs to fix about himself, i just hope he can find the strength needed to sort out his life so he can be happy.

Depression is a bitch.

[iamthedave3]

I thought it said in the bible that you go straight to hell if you commit suicide?

And I agree. Struggle makes us stronger. Untested people are usually weak ones.

[nathanforst1]

That is a very Catholic idea. I have met other christians that have their own viewpoints on suicide/hell. That's how religion is, mate. Nothing is set in stone and everything can be interpreted 1000 different ways from sunday. That's part of the problem.

[korwinblue]

If I wasn't an atheist, I'm convinced that I would've 'done' it too.

[Abidan1817]

done what?

[SakuraElyse]

I've been a shut-in for about a year since i dropped out of high school. I'm not necessarily proud of it, but I AM happier only communicating to people through the internet, when i can back away. Not that being alone makes me happy. But avoiding the things that hurt me keeps me from becoming hurt.

I can relate so much to the feeling, but particularly to you Nathan. If I had a camera or a working mic, i might make a video, but unfortunately I don't.

Peace~

[jem2738]

i been through this kind of thing I moved out of my parents house two years ago and just left

i have similar social problems

[jem2738]

hi nathan

first?

love all your videos

[nathanforst1]

Thanks. I'm getting back to some interesting commentary videos tomorrow. I just needed to make this video to Jerre first.