Ajahn Chah - Bio 20 - Struggles - Sexual Desire

[127miles]

Sexual desire is the last frontier

[squamish4244]

I greatly admire the Theravadan tradition, but its attitude towards sex strikes me as extreme and not practical for the modern world.

[questionful]

I must go live by myself and have this battle

[sathyayork]

Its not killing the desire, but rather getting detached from it. If you see, these guys give up everything that can control them starting with food, sleep, clothes, speech. And the one aspect that is most powerful is sex and it is obvious they want to detach themselves from that desire too. So the body chemistry does not change, the harmones r all there, but rather they train the mind not to listen to the cravings.

[helzero]

Is retraining from any sexual activity medically healthy to do all your life..? Also if everyone was a monk that achieved enlightenment wouldn't that mean that there wouldn't be a next generation of humans to carry into the future..?

[ikkyusang31]

There's diversity among human being. Not everyone could enlightening in their life.

[raryelcsouza]

@helzero

I think it would be interesting to do the following reflection...

Is it possible that every person renounce to the sense pleasures, attachments, owns and go to live a monastic life? It's not a real possibility in our world.

Another common thing is to think that if everybody become a monk it would be a problem because who would do the other things necessary for our survival? We forget that if everybody become a dentist for example it would also be a big problem.

[emborios]

This is what I don't get about Buddhism. Sexual desire is a natural thing, like eating or drinking. I don't see why I should need to overcome it.

[ikkyusang31]

So how the differences between human being and other animal then?

[yunshen]

Sexual desire is natural. What Buddhism is trying to achieve is to train the mind be not effected by this thirst for sexual satisfaction or any other states of dissatisfaction. A practitioner will eat and drink just enough for the maintainance of health but will train the mind so that it does not crave food just for satisfying the taste buds. Its all about training the mind to have peace even in the mist of physical and sensual dissatisfaction.

[storyboy989]

@emborios You need to eat and drink to stay alive, but you don't need sex to survive. It is purely a desire.

[mrcuteblackie]

sexual desire is there until your hormones naturally subside, due to diet, disuase of the sexual faculty, etc. This is natural, it is not YOU overcoming it.Sexual desire cannot stop you from getting enlightened. Eating salt or unsalted food has no effect either. Realize the true nature, that is all. whatever you do is irrelevant

[Corvastus]

Human nature is tangible. That sexual desire cannot be overcome is the product of ACCEPTING that limitation.

[impermanenttoo]

Like it or not, anyone who wants to attain enlightenment has to stay celibate. Sounds difficult? No, just have to train and tame our mind Imagine the fruit (Nibbana) is the sweetest that anyone can think of. Nibbana is that blissful mental state that is eternal. You'll desire no more.. There's no more struggle, no tears , no pain, no anger, and no attachment. They're all being eradicated by wisdom! You'll not be reborn in the sea of samsara anymore. Sounds wonderful?

[fabianfred537]

Remembering beauty is only skin deep....

Many people have found that right after sex when the immediate desire is sated that there is a feeling of disgust and repellance ...

[squamish4244]

@fabianfred537 And many more people don't...

[fabianfred537]

The monks and novices who are practising celibacy are encouraged to see the human body for what it really is...not something of beauty... but a leaky sack...full of blood, pus, sweat, bile, semen, shit, urine, etc....all manner of foul things and leaking from all the orifices. Even the most beautiful woman has to use the toilet and without bathing, after a few days of accumulated sweat, will smell.

[THEGR8BIGM0UTH]

@fabianfred537

Monks are trained to not only see how the human body actually is, but to see how reality actually is. The human body is no different that a fragrant flower or a beautiful sunset. The ultimate nature of all phenomena is after all empty. That includes dung as well as gold !

Remember aversion from the body is the same as attachment to it!

[LexMassive]

@fabianfred537 thank you, this helps. Seems so obvious as all truths do. Upon thinking of certain sexual images - past relations etc. - and applying your thought method I instantly see through the illusion. It's all image, but no matter how glamorous and seductive these images and ideas may seem upon thinking about it realistically I can see the lack of any substance in my desires and I can see how they have been allowed to manifest in my mind with the aid of delusion.

[brynnbateman]

Daniel - celibacy is a very monk specific trait. They're not trying to preach that every single Buddhist should not have sexual desire. They're saying that monks who wish to attain enlightenment must eventually overcome sexual desire.

[DanielForkbeard]

It was my concern for the monks that compelled me to comment. Besides, I don't know of a single human being who can go without experiencing an occasional sexual desire. Perhaps some of the very aged, or the very young. Again, my concern is with the language. I believe the words we choose are very revealing. You mentioned OVERCOMING sexual desire. This is power language. What do you do, wrestle it to the ground and make it submit? The Soto Zen folks I have known seem much gentler, less dualistic.

[DanielForkbeard]

Gautama the Buddha taught the technique of Vipassana meditation and the various sects arose later as Buddhists disagreed among themselves. It is the eclectic, post-modern perspective that says, "different strokes for different folks," which you seem to advocate. Also, you use GENTLER language than this sour-faced monk. YOU SAY "work with sexual desire." HE SAYS "overcome sexual desire." I take no exception to WORKING WITH arousal.

It was the ascetic, harsh approach at which I cringed. Thanks.

[BipolarBowler]

Would be hell to be a pubescent monk.

[guyneo]

Thanks for sharing.

[computermaster]

Sexual desire is aleays hard to overcome in a human body- especially with those raging hormones.