Bif Naked, Dog Shit, and a Homeless Man

[FunkyMcJambo]

i thought you were the turd

[skeletonmom]

I screamed and laughed...MADE MY MORNING!!!

[teakz89]

She put on weight, she still rocks tho

[punkgirl911]

@teakz89 Yeah she did, but when youre going through chemo, it'll make you skinny and after wards while getting better you'll put on weight. kudos to her though :)

[marasu66]

Hi, @bifnaked! Now I can add a voice to your tweets. (:

[joeblowthehot]

Ewwwwwwwwwwww poor girl!!!

[IAmNadir]

So it WAS the homeless man!!

[SpankRamen2]

It's funny:

When I see Bif Naked I think of Fairuza Balk

When I see Fairuza Balk I think of Bif Naked.

Bif Naked was adopted. I wonder... Long lost... Cousins???

It's possible.

[HubertCumberdaleIII]

@SpankRamen2

funny....me too. and i'd be happy with either...

[Slippymicky]

@SpankRamen2 They're both the same Zodiac sign. I can't stand her music but I think she's damn sexy. I'd pay to see them both oil wrestle.

[orpy]

@SpankRamen2 I just thought that as soon as she started talking! :)

[MrAquarius27]

Bif is awesome, shes original unlike a lot of artists you see and hear today. Bif rocks!!

[MrBlue707]

is this bitch on crack?

[sixedheart]

Love love love love love love!

[HaloLegendary]

I think I would have hit that dude or rubbed the shit in his face or both!

[jjlinert]

Yikes... Is this a real story or just for fun?

[Loverleezack]

@jjlinert real =)

[lilmisstrouble85]

she has this story on another 5 songs and a poem. she makes a serious valid point in that poem.

[BeatrixKiddowithlove]

She's a good story teller, artist, You should see her blogs, their really well done :D

New lessons.

[stubsfahey87]

that's f*d up!!

[cheedoz]

how recent is this? she does not look as pretty as i remember...

[Kindergoth]

@cheedoz This might be pretty resent. She just got over breast cancer.

[lilmisstrouble85]

@cheedoz breast cancer will do that to a woman lol but shes doin really well.

[sevenguiry]

Bif i love you and your storys lol they are a slice of fryed gold!!

[Samaire8]

I LOVE YOU BIF! <3

[TideAmoeba]

youre awesome bif

[lezhotty83]

Never knew she had cancer either. This story.. i cant believe she has show/lap dogs i wouldnt of believed it. And then.. eww.. finds out it's homeless man's eww..

[x1Biffy1x]

She had cancer ! she lost her hair

[kalyndahaaf]

love her but what did she do to her hair?! it makes her look 40!

[BelovedRogue1]

She was going though cancer treatment when this was made.

[kalyndahaaf]

yeah I like just saw it after I wrote it :S

I really didn't know.

[BelovedRogue1]

No worries. She is doing much better now. Do you ever go to her blog?

[kalyndahaaf]

She has a blog??? Cool! Where is it. It's hard to keep track of her for me (I live in the Netherlands) so.

[DarkDesires69]

She had cancer fuckwit. And she is 38 afterall, is she meant to look 20 after chemo?

[kalyndahaaf]

I said before - if you had bothered to read further - I only found out after I wrote it!

[oxfordpictionary]

yeah man... anyone who says she looks old is a douchepig. i mean, who cares, in the first place, and second of all, she's had cancer and looks pretty damn good for someone with cancer! not to mention ... i have spoken with her in real life and she looks damn good, cancer and all.

[TheRockael]

She had cancer :[

[kalyndahaaf]

Yeah I really hoop everything is going well with her I mean she is so cool. it's always the good ones who get it :(

and you are right for someone who had cancer, damb, she looks good, with some people you can tell they had cancer, it drains the life out of them, I mean I just thought she had a bad haircut, like rihanna sometimes has. She's still full of life and laughter thank god! :)

[TheRockael]

That's Bif for ya =)

Have you heard her album Okenspay Ordway? It's hilarious - she wanted to be a comedian before she wanted to be a singer. She's always so funny and kind and optimistic... ahh she's great =D

[kalyndahaaf]

No I haven't! Ah, YES I found it on iTunes. It's hard to find American stuff on iTunes sometimes, that is available abroad. Is that her on the cover?

hold on are they stories? cool! she should do audio books with her voice! way better then what you hear normally those snobby perfect English types of voices.

[TheRockael]

1. Canadian =p

2. Yupp, her on the front cover as a child

3. It's a spoken word album =) Poems, stories... hilarious. Bif is amazing.

[kalyndahaaf]

no way she's Canadian? seriously, and here I was for years thinking that she's American, ok she was adopted I know that so biologically speaking she's neither, but still.

and so cool that she did stories! I'm so gonna download that! :D

[repelghosts]

we always love ya Biffy...Luv,

Gemma n everyone in Toronto!!!

[KarthikSoun]

She looks so happy always.. she is so cute i wish i was with her!

[rageohol]

go back to the bangs Bif!...those were SO hot!

[lilchangeling]

lmao wow poor clueless doggy yuck eating poo lol

[Hellfire7575]

OMFG!!!!!!!! that is nasty but funny

[sevenguiry]

ah Bif , your still hot

[SpankRamen2]

"I had nowhere else to go". ROTFLMAO

Priceless.

[r0yak]

looooool that's awesome

[vwscully]

bwahahaha sooo funny!! :D

[fanmvanyan77]

Bif Naked is a verry smart lady.

[TimWessel]

Gross........sorry Bif.

[tru160489]

sooo damn funny!!!

XX

[OMFGWHORE]

hahahaha ! i loove her. i saw her live last night !

[repelghosts]

I have met Biffy on 2 occasions and she is one of the sexiest,intelligent,funny,char­ismatic women I have ever met...

jeff

Toronto

[lockerdogs]

u rock bif keep going on

[cmajano]

looks like Fairuza Balk

[OCPrunsthecops]

Looks like Liza Minnelli

[sarahlacroixmusic]

lmao this is hilarious!

[HunSmurf]

Bif Naked Is A Wonderful Lady ;) I Took My Fren Out For Her Birthday To See Bif Naked Live What A Amazing Show! And Then The Very Next Day She Walked Into The Place Where I Work At Shoppers Drug Mart :) and casually shops i totally got her to sign my work shirt shes such a nice Person =)

[minpinlove]

she's such a nice and swwet person, and pretty. she gave me a signed d that says:

to alecs

YOU RULE!

love,

bif naked

xoxo

she may have spelt my name wrong but she is the absolute sweetest for giving it to me signed! love u bif! u rock!

[StarlitSailor]

ahh honestly..she looks beautiful, shes wonderful, and she was AMAZING on stage, I've met her in Philly, and she was INCREDIBLY energetic and super on stage. You dont know what Biffy is like unless u see her on stage. she is beautiful and peaceful. So dont judge her. She is one of the most energetic ppl on stage!!!1 Shes amazing!!! LOVE YOU BIFFY!!!!

[lictor313]

she's obviously neurotic... and pretty fucking ugly at that too...

[essthefan]

met her tonight , she is a sweet person

[oxfordpictionary]

I was lucky enough to be able to interview Bif Naked and she is definitely one of the most hilarious, most compassionate and most sweet people I've ever met. Live long and prospah Bif! You rock.

[alleykats09]

eww that was sick

[emsyblake]

I think she was hilarious :D

[fubarcat50]

hey bif, just an old Kensington Market fan here, hope you r doing well, and scoop some more poop, yay

[Qiaofan]

omg lol thats sick poor doggie

[cutbuddie]

lol HAHA

[VagPap92]

00:42 LOL

[xXLouLovesKeriXx]

Omg Funny As F*** Lmao

[9sturtzby77]

she looks like a fucking cunt

[fubarcat50]

Hey, Bif, u were always the hottest part of Toronto, when u were here

Love ya babe

[Marinescu1982]

Yeah, I guess she's more popular in her heimat of Canada. She had one song on Mtv here a few years ago and I thought she was good, but I never saw her on the tele after that.

[CKBBontabeachbum]

So : that was 'Biff Naked' ? I saw her play , in her band , some years back . I couldn't say I would've recognized her , but could believe that's her . Good story , too !

[pooptubeyobutt]

That's the story of "Eina Tasse Tee" =))

[LJARSONBECK]

Are we sure this woman isn't homeless. How much has she had to drink over the years to slur over her words like that- or were they simply muffled by all the tattooed crap across her lungs- what a princess- I'm sure when she was 7 years old this is exactly how she pictured herself.

[oxfordpictionary]

do you feel that all women have to be picture-perfect images of femininity? i hate to break it to you, but the world's a lot more complicated than that. and are you what you pictured at age 7? let me guess, a firefighter or an astronaut! oooh! Ha ha. if i could be as wicked awesome as bif i'm sure my 7-year-old self would be proud!

[interested976]

National Burn Your Bible Day December 25th 2012

[puissse]

that haircut makes her older

[kmunk]

It's called chemo...

[puissse]

she has cancer??

[kmunk]

breast cancer, yes.

[puissse]

oh, well i didnt know that

[Vares65]

Frankly, I think she's doing/looking pretty damn good considering.

GO BIF!

[oxfordpictionary]

she is older, who cares?

[puissse]

only 40

[angelofirreverence]

What's with the accent?

[puissse]

she was born in India, raised in Canada

[joannepsi]

She was a baby when she was taken to the USA and then Canada by her adoptive parents. Doesn't explain her almost NYC Jewish accent!

[angelofirreverence]

That's what I thought, a Brooklynesque kinda thing, weird.

[missbunnie22]

She is absolutely the most beautiful woman I know. Kind hearted, wonderful soul. She is a great role model and has a great sense of humor. She would never forget who she is and would do anything for her fans. I'm so glad she is overcoming her cancer, and I mean, look at her! You can't even tell she has it! Love you Biffy, you are a rock!

[SnapperWasHere]

@missbunnie22 She really is... plus, I grew up loving her!

[welcomefish10]

she got cancer

[Ouchie333]

Canadianmaple09 I have no doubt that you are a nerd, but maybe your not a very smart one. Nerds usually do some research before they open there mouths and sound really insensitive, and very ignorant. Her 'stupid hair cut' wasn't a choice, it is a reality of chemo!

[TAG037]

they should upload the best story ever with Craig Ferguson, i love that one!

[shrineheart87]

what ever happened to her.

[uskitin]

She had breast cancer. But she is coming back, and her new CD releases may 5th! Yay!

[govievil]

lol its so funny xD. biff rocks

[bumblingb]

uhg, I could ralph...

I feel a little sorry for everyone involved tho, lol.

[JenMarCar]

HooRaY!! VAncouver!!

[vIKTORIAxo]

haha omg

[Sqeekybubbles]

LMFAO,

Hahahah,

I wassnt exspecting that That Was just Ohh man!

OOOO MAN!

LMFAAAAO! [: I unno

ANyways hii xD

OHH FUCKNUGGETS OF THE HOLY LORD MAN BALLS ! xD

Awee man i'm way too over tired xD

[superflowerrr]

Haha you should submit that to FML.

[jademm]

Pure nastiness...but still funny.

I must go take a shower now.

[bruceleroy1973]

is it just me or does she look like she's on the verge of tears through this whole thing?

[GeniusBoy88]

Now THAT is a punchline!

[brenthoser99]

great story, the people below are to literal and have sticks up there ass'. GREAT STORY all around, yay for bif. have some of her cd's.

[fleeperzonk]

At least she didn't get it on her new tango shoes. AMIRITE?

[nietzsche71]

this chick is not talented enough to listen to for 2 min

[mellysoup]

Dogs plus poop-eating..I thought I had that topic covered--I am humbled.

[JinnyCricket]

Excellent! I have a dog myself...who unfortunately has a sweet tooth for....dirty kleenex... so I kinda know how Bif feels...but never have I ever had to go to the degree she did.

Definately one of my favourite stories.

[skitza95]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA­

[gilraen789]

Biff is terriff!

[johnfraserm]

Wow, Joan Rivers is looking bad ass these days!

[juicr500]

Saw this last night. Hahahahaha!

BEST STORY EVER.

[karalouise5]

Aww Bif looks awesome!! She told that story so well! and it was so funny! ll

[89shelly]

This was great!!

[paganiniGOGO]

She's Indian.

[ramona7609]

great story - could be the best story ever

[canadianmaple09]

Bif looks so terrible. She was never attractive and now she's just hideous. She looks like a trainwreck.

[FallenPatriotic]

she has cancer too, usually that makes a woman look sexier

[ikilledstjimmy]

Uhm dude... she had cancer... give her break and shut the fuck up. People can't control how they look when they get cancer. Three of my family members have had cancer so i kind of take offense to that

[canadianmaple09]

She looked terrible before she had cancer too. Hope that comforts you.

[ikilledstjimmy]

Oh ya and can i ask what you look like? I'm sorry, but you shouldn't bash people that can't control what kind of disease or sickness they get. Not fucking cool. From what it looks like, a lot of people disagree with you and agree with what i say. Think about that why don't you.

[canadianmaple09]

In case you missed it, I said she was unattractive before the cancer. I don't find manly, tattoo-covered, over-done makeup-wearing whores attractive. That's it. Sorry to offend the half dozen Bif Naked fans that are out there.

[insidelights]

while she does wear a lot of make-up, i wouldn't go as far as saying she's a whore. she's married ... last time i checked, being in monogamous marriage is the last thing a whore would do.

[canadianmaple09]

I'm talking about the way she dresses... you don't always have to take everything in the most literal sense.

[brutallyunbiased]

I just took a gander at one of your videos...would you like to know what I think of your appearance?

nerd.

[canadianmaple09]

If I was self conscious and didn't want people to know what I look like I wouldn't upload videos of myself, would I? I'm a nerd for sure, no way around it. Never been cool, never will be. At least I haven't wrecked my body with dozens of hideous tattoos and I don't have a stupid haircut either. For the record I'm not a gamer, I hate anime, and I have a girlfriend. Maybe that will give you a bit of a better picture of me.

[brutallyunbiased]

Maybe Bif Naked feels just as comfortable with her appearance as you do....

Btw, how does your own medicine taste?

[oxfordpictionary]

bahahahahahah oh man... ps who on earth cares what SHE looks like? you're only A) opening yourself up to criticism and B) making a moot point. what does her appearance matter at all? her tattoos are making the statement that she wants to be different and all her hair fell out because of chemo. bif just IS who she is and that's why i love her.

[oxfordpictionary]

yes, actually, that's what language is. it's a way we communicate, and certain words mean certain things. not only does whore mean a woman who accepts money for sex, it's also a derogatory, sexist term. It's the same as using the N-word to describe a black person. If you can't handle a woman showing some skin, get the hell off the internet and stay locked in your room with your Victorian fantasies. Ha ha. Turd.

[joannepsi]

She does NOT dress like a whore. What are you, a mormon?

[brutallyunbiased]

hey bud, if you want to see what mr. perfect(aka canadianmaple09) looks like, just go to his page and check out his videos...you will thank me.

hint: think of Gilbert, from "Revenge of the Nerds"

[zeropointprophet]

bif  is soo hot

[WeskJago]

MAKE MORE MUSIC!!! please? :)

[ikilledstjimmy]

HOLY CRAP!!! Literally!!! Oh my god.... that is just SO disgusting it's not even funny!!! Like honestly, if you were a homeless person why would you take a shit right on the sidewalk?? Do it in some alley or something.. wow that's just ughk, what a creeper little dog! i don't think my dog would ever do that lol

[northernsplash]

so i totally didnt get that it was homeless man's poop until i read ur comment....i was soo confused i thought he was following them coz he had nowhere to go...wow...that is pretty disgusting!!!

[ikilledstjimmy]

Haha i know!! Like why would you do that on a sidewalk? He must have mental issues lol

[paganiniGOGO]

what happened to my comment?

[paganiniGOGO]

More importantly, why the FUCK would you follow and tell the woman?

[ikilledstjimmy]

HAHA ya that too!! :P

[ticijev]

ouch!

[Sath770]

lulz