Mass Effect 2 Funny Conversation

[CyricZ]

I thought turian females didn't have head fringes.

Unless... the turians into boys. :-P

[grovatbu]

I know that there are games that show boobs. A naked asari should be fine.

[VladofWallachiaandCa]

4 guys have been embarrassed in front of the stripper

[ANiGhtM4rE]

In the same bar is also a funny conversation between a quarian and a turian ... but this is great too ^^

[mrbong579]

Haha ... yeah you right ... i wonder how a turian dancer looks ... but actually nothing tops a asari ... :D haha

[TheAdonfraz]

There aren't many turian women anywhere

[FuckinBowDown1]

This conversation ruined the Asari for.

It's funny but nevertheless. . . .

[httm241]

@FuckinBowDown1 jar jar binks in mass effect 3 how would you react 

[FuckinBowDown1]

@httm241 Comfortable in the fact that he isn't messing with my mind at least.

[bucknemc]

All the strippers you can set at have only 2 basic, repetitive dance moves. Clubs in ME3 will feel more real if they put strippers you can sit and watch that have a larger variety of complex dance moves...like the pool dancers in the Afterlife club. The other stuff is so generic.

[ALowCharityMember]

SHOTS OUT OF THE ASARI'S BELLY BUTTON...I GOT FIRST DIBS!

[RogueVector]

That is one professional stripper right there.

[NarakusSlave]

I just realized there is no such thing as currency anymore in the Mass Effect future so…What do you put in a strippers thong?

[poblo234]

@NarakusSlave i dunno ... a floppy disk ... hehe

[RougeKrieger]

The "Asari look like my species" made be crack up

[Youngisgod]

1:38 Holy God! THat is some seriously fucked up thinking!

[89BlackGatomon]

O yeah i was interessted ingame on this dialog =D

[Serothicution]

Ah yes, "strippers" females who dance half naked for money and who tempt infidelity at bachelor parties. We have dismissed that claim.

[DeathScepter]

i feel for the turian.

[FeanorBR]

Turians - no fun allowed

[CaptainApop]

"Humans celebrate weeding contracts by tempting infidelity? That makes no sense"

You know ,he makes a good point.

[Justforvisit]

I'm just here for the funny mass effect videos

[JediKnightIlona]

I bet Shepard is going to be talking about this for a while. ^^

[whman17411]

I just noticed that that's all the council races are at that table

[asherchuck]

If u stand between the human and the asari you can get a killer view of her ass

[TaTayTai1011C]

Salarians are all business & seriousness.

Turians are all alcoholics & cheep when it come to buying drinks.

Humans are all party animals.

Asaris are all . . . all . . . 'Dat ass"

[skillzofatree]

Human: "wait, you dont think they're, like, mind-controling us do you?"

Asari: "ASSUMING DIRECT CONTROL"

[deidarasenpai009]

Garrus:Im just here for the calibrations

[Shasdorius]

Grumpy turian is grumpy.

[IwannaKnowTech]

Im going to become a astronaut so I can find me some Asari

[justmymage]

Asshat:There aren´t many turian women on illium.

World:There aren ENY turian women in existence!

[18jeda]

@justmymage They will probably appear in Mass Effect 3, because there weren't any Quarian men in the first Mass Effect.

[RaithSienar]

I have always wondered what that dancer thought of the 3 moron's claiming "No Asari look like Salarians! No you douche, they look like humans!! No you other douche, they look like blue Turians!!!"

[bboyever]

I'm just here for the funny video.

[frost330]

lol that salarian sounds like Quagmire in family guy

[george77772moons]

THE THREE STOOGES OF THE FUTURE.

[njahmoon89]

Asari stripper: God, I don't get paid enough to listen to them talk.

[MasterJean72]

I think I have never seen a Female Turian....

[LunaArgentum10]

@MasterJean72 I don't think I've ever seen a female Turian, Salaria, or Krogan......I really wanna know what they look like. For some reason I imagine the Krogan females as much smaller than the males. Probably because they don't fight.

[cloudclone001]

@LunaArgentum10 If i remember correctly theres a female krogan on tuchanka as a ambassador from the female clan and she looks like the other krogan with a less deep voice as the male

[LunaArgentum10]

@cloudclone001 I'm gonna have to go back and explore there more. Thanks.

[RaithSienar]

@cloudclone001 Actually, that "Female Krogan" is just a Young Male Krogan who hadn't undergone his Rite of Passage yet, AKA he was still a Kid which means he still lived with the female Clan

[george77772moons]

Lol, the mind-control bit may in fact be a valid point...

[Samaugsch]

@george77772moons That's what I thought. o.O

[merrychristmasreaper]

1:01 XD

[PortisFan100]

Dude! Your shepard looks just like mine!. Every single detail!

[mouldymat]

I still don't see why we're hear.

You do realise there's a hot chick dancing on the table?

[cowbaner]

i'm just here for the drinks

[Oregateau]

Drat, Asari are ruined for me now.

[m3gadork]

try to imagine a female elcor stripper.

OH MY GOD. I'm gonna have to scrub my brain with some soap and a sponge now...

[Emilklog]

she is very, *limber* xD :p

[plutarch78]

Bioware needs to give the ladies better stripper outfits.

[rufflesl]

@plutarch78 i agree completely 100%

[Puttetier]

@plutarch78 and EA needs to calm down more over the sexual potential of this game and the hidden censorship this game provides. Here's to being Happily drunk!

[AgentWax]

@plutarch78 Bioware needs to put actual nudity in their games.

[MasterXelcas]

@AgentWax well in ME1 ashley, liara, or fem shep can be seen completely naked...

[TheYeldark]

@plutarch78 If Bioware did that. We would be at Omega and Illium all the figgin' time! The whole galaxy would suffer!! Trillions would perish!!!

[MyGamerforlife]

@plutarch78 Well, A-rated games aren't sold in retailers, if that's what you mean by "Better Outfits." Still, I'd tap that. Twice.

[BigHectorn]

@plutarch78 its a pretty good stripper outfit

[musicmanz15]

@plutarch78 Probably get shit from activists if they did.

[strange1guy]

@plutarch78

how about they give them no outfits, that's the only better outfit if you ask me :p

[xGimpyx]

@plutarch78 I'm thinking that your squad should have some ready too. :p

[wannes47]

@plutarch78

or different outfits

[FWGSD]

@plutarch78 and bigger boobs.

[themuddybunny3]

is it me or is that the same outfit kelly has????

[myforbidden]

@themuddybunny3 That's the standard stripper outfit. The asari strippers wear them in ME1 too, so technically, it's not Kelly's outfit at all...

[phozk]

@GenoFax I was thinking about that and I realized you also don't see any female krogans, salarians, drells, voluses (or is it volii), batarians or vorcha.

[TheGrimkeeper90]

"There aren't many turian woman on Illium." There don't seem to be any turian women ANYWHERE.

[albatross1977]

haha all council races are represented here.

[ManintheMask1212]

human: she controlling our minds man.

turian: that's just plain stupid.

asari: ASSUMING DIRECT CONTROL.

salarian: FFFFFUUUUUUUUUUU...

[narutokingvamp1991]

i have a feeling that the stripper isnt gonna survive the night 0-0

[SimKoning]

@Devilboy0604 "Young males have an unhealthy obsession with my species" -Liara on Noveria ME1

[skyman322]

ok i can see the human a turain in asari but how the hell do they look like the salariana?

[skyman322]

@skyman322 whoops typo s not a at the end

[KingGalby]

Ah yes, the "bachelor party," the celebration of wedding contracts by tempting infidelity. We have dismissed that claim.

[Pokerface1337]

Ah yes... the bachelor party.... I laughed my ass off by listening to that :)

[samanbandana]

her dancing gives me a headache !

[NinjaDuck93]

Shot Shots Shots Shots Shots Shots Shots Shots Shots Shots!

[Awesomeness28100]

To all ME fans, as I post this comment, a Mass Effect movie is in production

[JB346Aussie]

@Awesomeness28100 So I assume they've cracked a way to have the audience choose who lives, who dies and what the ending is? It isn't Mass Effect if there is a fixed ending and you can't control who lives or who dies.

[Awesomeness28100]

@JB346Aussie Man, all I know is a Mass Effect movie is being made.

[LookieHippie]

@JB346Aussie I'm hoping they won't even put Sephard into the movie, I want them to only reference him/her. Giving Sephard a face wouldn't make me happy at all. Then again, a story without Sephard would be even more difficult to write, especially if the fans want to see all their favorite characters and if we want it to fit to the time-line of the games.

They'll have hard time making a movie most will enjoy. A really hard time. I hope they'll succeed.

[SimKoning]

@JB346Aussie I think there is more to Mass Effect than "choose your own adventure": it's a fictionalized version of the Milky Way galaxy with over a dozen fleshed out and detailed alien species, and is at the same time far more realistic and up to date than either Star Trek or Star Wars.This needs to be a movie more than any other game ever made.

[rumblepitchamp56]

@Awesomeness28100 producers of spider-man and the dark knight (:

[Zezimahater1]

ITS MIND CONTROL

[IanROX22]

it would be so great if there was a male asari in mass effect 3

[Ken8ball123]

@IanROX22 there are no asari males, they r mono-gendered. Liara explains it in mass effect 1.

[IanROX22]

@Ken8ball123 i know all that, i'm just saying it would be funny, and there would be alot of questions

[imanerd000]

as anyone ever seen a turian or salarian woman??? where are they? and the kids too?

[SimKoning]

@imanerd000 A way of saving money. They better fix that by Mass Effect three...

[envyVIPER]

I'm taking that Turian to my next AA meeting.

[disastrous123]

since when is there female turians?????

[plutarch78]

Wait....they have female turians in this game? LOL

[AquiMiserez]

One's questioning the logic behind all this, another just wants to get drunk, and a third is defending the warped human (as far as I can tell) tradtion of "male bonding", and the lot of them are falling under whatever mind control that stripper's using to get bigger tips. Even funnier, the human might accually be on to her game, but no one wants to do anything about it. Gotta love cultural transmission, LOL.

[melchCody]

@jax3294 not true at all. Every female Krogan is at a different camp for there protection. They are NEVER anywhere else. The only female krogan you "see" is dead on a table with a blanket on her during Mordin's loyalty mission.

[EmoNekoChan]

@jax3294 Really? Hmm. Looks like I'm really gonna have to pay attention next time I got there :D

[EmoNekoChan]

@jax3294 How do you know that? Was it mentioned in one of the novels?

[TheSpartanburger]

That can't be sanitary.

[cr9527]

Blue females with tenticles don't do nothin for me...

[TheMarvelousHat]

HUNDREDS OF YEARS

MILLIONS OF LIGHT YEARS

ONE SPECIES HAS THE SAME GOAL

OPERATION: DAT ASS

[justmymage]

@TheMarvelousHat You sir deserve a medal.

[OKeefeSan]

It seems like aliens are a bit of a stick in the mud...

[twitcher64]

@OKeefeSan Just Salarians.

[coolbones]

@flaboy30

I`m pretty sure that white people act like this in every single country on the whole planet so why are you saying that they are just like americans specificaly? Looks like someone should travel a bit...

[Akplayerone]

i have noticed that we havent seen a female turian yet... that disturbs me

[BlazingFire12]

@Akplayerone I allso think that we have not seen female Krogon

[Tinduong1]

yet the stripper is just there dancing and not listening or responding to their conversations ^_^ ..........

[Aslantorn]

lol humans never change

[Silent14411]

"sigh" this again

[amazes100]

humans teaching the aliens of the universe the joy of half naked women

[gorboy]

"Calm down, man! Don't embarass me in front of the stripper!"

[laski666]

"That can't be sanitary."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

[OverlordLS]

After hearing this the first time, I had much lulz irl.

[Delafoi]

Human - American

Salarian - Jew

Turian - Finnish

Asari - Swedish

FFFFUUUU-

[JBSauce]

@Delafoi The Volus are the Jews.

[Lostprophetzzz]

@JBSauce no.

the volus are a race of danny de'vito's

[marciomoraes70]

@Lostprophetzzz LOL.... very well noted!

[roxyosox122]

@Delafoi How are Turians like the Finnish? I just want to know.

[DkFr88]

LOLOL Aren't they mind-controlling us to make us see them attractive?! LOL I thought they would pull out a flamethrower and burn the "witch" LOL

[TNTLotLP]

okay, seriously. What? Mind control? o_0

that shit is interesting.

[Arzaker]

i love all of them even volus

[pacmanian1000]

is the salarian jewish?

[4life4win]

@pacmanian1000 Yep. They seem very similar.

[sitmanred]

MIND CONTROLL

[realMAFUCKAH]

Ha ha, genuine lolz!

[TrueInnovator159]

Human: "Okay, you see that bit there?"

Salarian: "The little divot in her abdomen?"

Human: "It's called a belly button. Humans & Asari have them, & you're going to be doing shots out of it later tonight."

Turian: "That can't be sanitary."

Human: "Not the point man!"

This shit's funny, haha. :P

[5559247]

@TrueInnovator159 Come to think of it, alcohol is a disinfectant, can't be that unsanitary... right?

[nic0dem8D]

zomg its raiden for metal gear

[HeroOfCanton99]

Why is that turian obseesed with the drinks?

[FarthingFury]

Because, that's probaly the main reason most guys go to these things, even if it's with someone they like.

[HeroOfCanton99]

(Nobody is drinking anything)

[Starscream3352]

@HeroOfCanton99

IT'S GREEN

[looktospaceandsee]

wait they could be mind controlling ah o god my brain it hurts must deflect waves by wearing tin foil hat.......................oh my god

[KingLazerman]

DON'T EMBARASS ME IN FRONT OF THE STRIPPER!

Aren't Salarian years like dog years.

LOL the convo gets so funny over time.

[sergiu1231]

Heard that conversation

[sluge44]

y did u choose the retard Shepard?

the best one is the first one

[HiddenSharigan]

@sluge44 What the fuck are you talking about?

[sluge44]

@HiddenSharigan I mean the shepard that looks like a retard...

THe best one is the first guy... :P

[calligraphyartist]

LOL

[Retdelswizdog]

haha funny how humans haven't changed at all

[FreemanicParacusia]

What was it Ashley said in ME1 at Chora's Den?

"Here we are, a million light-years from where humanity began, and we walk into a bar full of drunk men drooling over a half-naked woman shaking her ass on a stage. I don't know if that's funny or sad."

[quadraxas]

she also said,

"Human or alien. We are all animals."

Animals.

[SigmarusOne]

@FreemanicParacusia What? You dont think there here for the food... erhh drinks?

[almightdude27]

@FreemanicParacusia yeah it was, that was sick

[MisterProdigy]

@FreemanicParacusia

Kaidan: "Aren't they here for the food?" :P

[italianboy555100]

@FreemanicParacusia id say a little bit of both

[Linkforlife199]

Kaiden: "What? You don't think they are here for the food?"

[Leylaashley]

@FreemanicParacusia both xD

[Rayzser]

Apparently... The reason why there are no turians in ME is because the developers had no more time/room/memory in the game to create new models - female turians.

[Rayzser]

why there are no female* turians

[Senital786]

Urgh, Asari are so.. Squishy, where are you supposed to get a Decent Hold?

[SinerAthin]

I recommend Krogan in that case ;P

[boons50]

this is a great part of the game

"dont embarress me in front of the stripper"

[youngtboys]

ha ha ha im like the turian never pay for the drinks

[DarkWolfScythe]

wait a second... i havent seen any turian women anywhere O.O

[avianmaster]

@DarkWolfScythe Exactly, I have yet to see any female versions of any of the citadel races (except quarians) I gotta see what a female turan looks like or a female krogan.

[toms1266]

There is a female Krogan on Tuchanka. She is dead, though.

[5krif]

you have, vocally they are unisex

[coolkid3333333333]

CHEAP TURIAN!

[shougoh]

I'm commander shepard and this is my favorite kind of limber blue chick

[legendarytoyou]

BITE YOUR TONGUE! she's russian. I LOVE russian accents.  imho there's nothing more sexy =)

[spartan1010101]

ditto =3=

[johohitchhike]

she is a lovely shade of blue :D

[Ex0dus111]

Well THAT certainly raises a lot of questions about the Asari.

What if they ACTUALLY look like Krogan!!

I HIT THAT!!

[slayar15]

i agree. asari look more like human

[666SLAY3R666]

Quarians > Asari

[HowlingWolf518]

1:38 = Convergent Evolution WIN

[Requal82]

Dude your freaking Shepard looks just like mine hahaha talking about the face.

Can you like give me a face picture of it to see if its 100% the same haha you can judge and see mine on my profile

[E123Ultima]

ZOMG!!! Are the Asari like pleasure GELFS from Red Dwarf!?

[Daycrist]

Somehow I don't think they are giant blobs though

[Yermog]

"Humans celebrate marriage contracts by tempting infidelity? That makes no sense!"

Leave it to a Salarian to point out the flaws in a good time. XD (not that I don't agree to some degree)

[alchemyfreak3]

da fuck