Day 15: Coping with Separation and Divorce: Saturdays Suck!

[AngelandAna1]

You need your kids. Do what u need to do to get your kids. Women dont NEED men. If he is worthy of your time and beauty he wont hurt you, but for the most part, men only ruin women. They think they can posses us and they can keep giving us the crappy end of the stick. Men are nothimg without us. There isnt a thing men can do that women cant, but there is a whole lot that women do that men couldnt even comprehend. All you need is your kids & they are the ones that need you.

[joshgrobanfan1991]

WHY YOU NO HAVE CUSTODY OF YOUR KIDS????????

[AfreeQueen]

@joshgrobanfan1991 I don't have custody of my kids because #1. I didn't conceive them on my own. #2..after our separation and his wanting a divorce...and me moving back to Chicago and not finding a job after a certain amount of time, I decided to ask him to have the kids for a year...they missed a lot of time with him when he was overseas... also, I needed time to get over my situation, find a job and get my life together so that I'll be a better mom for them when I do see them again.



[joshgrobanfan1991]

@AfreeQueen .....I CANT IMAGINE MYSELF WITH OUT MY KIDS, BUT I KIND UNDERSTAND YOUR POINTS!!!......I HOPE YOU PUT EVERYTHING TOGETHER SOON A TAKE YOUR KIDS BACK BEFORE IS TOO LATE!!!

[mscaramelcreole]

hey sister I know how you feel..feels like someone died. i weng thru the same thing, my husband worked in Russia and money and attention went to his head.. now he has a child with a russian woman with all his family and friends support and I was left to pick up the pieces. i went into a depression and my academics suffered..you got to see your beauty or strength and guess what? He did you a favour. All the girlfriend inherited was a dishonest cheater, thank God he is not your problem anymore.

[malgoska76]

How are you doing now????

[dhawan167]

i am going through littlebit same the advice for u is make yourself busy. listen to loud music when u r emotional otherwise whatever u want to. look at your body or home or anything needs extra attention give it. go to chuch enjoy being with kids. walk atleast 3 miles will give u peace of mind and good night sleep 100% working idea. learn something new like dance, singing, piano or advance computer or swimming make friends there its not end of world. talk to your ex nicely because he is a fathe

[rok30]

i hope you are doing better now

[UyhgtNkjui]

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[abuhafsa]

I feel you AfreeQureen. Im going trough a divorce myself. My wife left me. My world is crushed. I miss my wife and kids being around. I miss coming home to my family. My world flipped upside down. I had the world. And lost everything. It HURTS.

[AfreeQueen]

@abuhafsa I feel horrible for not responding to you 3 months ago. I want to tell you that the feelings are normal and universal. Men and women alike who go through things like this need an out. We need to learn how to breathe all over again. The daily routines are always going to be missed. Quality time with the family and with your ex significant other included.

I really hope you are healing well after this is all said and done.

Peace and Love

E.

[fruitycunt]

getting a divorce was the best thing i ever did... now im happy and i get more ass than a toilet seat.. i have more money, my house is paid off and I have a new girl-friend 17 years younger than me who i don't live with and get a bj EVERY time i see her.. if youre a man there is NO reason to marry... women who want to marry just want your money and your sperm!

[AfreeQueen]

@fruitycunt That's not true. Some women who want to marry want your money.... SOME women who want to marry...want to do it for the love of real men. THe woman you were with was obviously a dumbass. Do what you need to do...but don't blame all women who want a relationship for the break up of yours.

[fruitycunt]

@AfreeQueen its true.. single moms are the worst... women age like milk men like wine.. youre just angry because youre a fugly..

[AfreeQueen]

@fruitycunt ...says the person with the username 'fruitycunt'. LOL I'm not the most gorgeous woman in the world but I'm worthy of respect because I give it. seems to me that you are not worthy of anyone's respect because you're a special kind of person. You're ugly on the INSIDE. To me, that' the worse person in the world.

[DIJV79]

@fruitycunt I'm also anti-marriage and don't believe in having children, but I think you might want to chill on this one.

[destiny9456]

don't be sad at least you had that time no one can take away,i have not been divorced but i know how if feels to lose a man that you love alot....it does sucks,,,the wig looks good,i think it is important to meet her his girlfriend not to start nothing but to be fimiliar your kids re around her come on out of respect on both ends,has he apologize for leaving or not letting you know how he felt...do you forgive him 14 years is like growing up 2gether.... be strong

[AfreeQueen]

@destiny9456 For along time I couldn't forgive him. I couldn't even see myself forgiving him. BUT I do now... but right now it's way past forgiving him for his finding someone while we were married. Certain things he does it seems to be mean- spirited and hateful. Now I have to move on from THAT too because life moves on no matter HOW I feel anymore. IF I don't concentrate on what's going to make me a better woman, I'll be right back where I started almost 2 years ago.

Thank you so much. :)

[realady81]

am 29 years old woman from kuwait , I brokeup with my love one last year I sruggeld alot I cried and was sad for a long time .... I am watchin ur video now and u cant emagine how much ur supporting me sister ur helping alot of women all around this big world bless you bless you bless you may god help you and give u happiness u deserve it I love u so much

[ImSo1000]

I'm not married or even engaged but I can appreciate someone exposing their personal life. You are a strong woman and you will pass along your courage to other men and women that they too can make it. Thank you Be Blessed

[TheodorusRex]

Hang in there Doll... I'm going thru it too...!

[gosunsss]

hi there, I just split with my hubby after 19 yrs, we have a 14 yr old child. I know exactly what you are going through. My best advice to you, just know his new "Ms Thing" will not last! Focus on your strengths and improve yourself, love yourself, you are worth it! You are a women and we are strong!

[AfreeQueen]

@gosunsss Hey...funny how life goes... "Ms. THing" lasted for such a short time...and it didn't take him 5 minutes before he'd find a NEW Ms. Thang to fill her  place. This is comedy right now. lol

[tori3012]

Hi, I think you are a really brave, lovely woman, i am going through the same shit at the moment ( my husband of 20yrs dumped me by text message). I burst into tears when i watched this, i dont feel like the only person going through this shit.

Take comfort in your friends and family.

I think you will have a wonderful life eventually.

Love all the way from london

Vicky

[daintydina]

Hello. It's been a year for me, and I still cry and struggle with being divorced. I am trying to move on and date someone else, and its been difficult. I am relying on my faith, and I encourage you to do the same. If you want to talk just let me know. We all should stick together.

[bonzelite]

you are a very brave and strong woman to come onto YouTube with this issue. I commend you. Be strong. You are a wonderful person inside and out. I know it hurts beyond words. It's tough. You will endure.

[MrMalcolm24]

You're going to get through this sista, he probably didn't deserve you anyway... be strong.

[Erica2426]

Wow...very powerful stuff. For u to be able to come up here and share ur story of what u been going thru is beautiful. Continue to stay strong my sista, God does not give us more then what we can bare. Stay wrapped in the WORD. BE STRONG AND COURAGES.

Blessings,

E

[AfreeQueen]

What's up, E. :) Thank you so much for your kind words. You know, this has actually been longer than this series over 4 days... Its actually been 4 months. And to tell you the absolute truth, I have recently been in contact with the woman so that we can figure out , if she's going to be in our daughters' lives, how to be positive female role models in their lives. THAT is SO hard to do especially when you want to throw something. lol

[lundyncanada]

You are a QUEEN and I look up to you.

[livinmybestlife]

I'm praying that God will heal your heart and restore your soul! No No I said that wrong I'm AGREEING with Gods word that says HE WILL HE SHALL heal your heat and restore your soul...You shall recover! luv ya and b blessed!

[blackhealthvillage]

I'm praying for you.When I feel bad on the inside, I cry then I find something to laugh at. Laughing at least stops the tears. Then I find something to do. I've never been in this situation before so I can't say I know how you feel BUT I'm praying for you. May the Holy Spirit comfort your heart and fill you with peace that surpasses all understanding.

[AfreeQueen]

Thank you so much for your encouragement. :) Check out "Day 25" , I'm getting a lot better. It still hurts but I'm learning how to heal from the inside out. :)

God bless you,

A Free Queen

[AfreeQueen]

Thanks for the comment, jgod. I am happy to report, though that after I made this video, the last time I cried was after the video was downloaded and I took my problems to God. I didn't realize how much of my spirit was being wasted on crying over someone who chose to be with another woman. My strength and courage comes from a lot of places. First my girls... if they see me breaking down all of the time (not that I shouldn't have the right to) , they're going to take cues from me...

[AfreeQueen]

...and handle their problems the same way. (Which is counterproductive.) Of course, we know strength doesn't mean 'no crying allowed' ... its all about what you do to make things better in the end.

Again, thank you for your inspiring/encouraging words. I'll continue to push on. :)

A Free Queen

[reemixmedia]

We don't always have to be empowering and strong as Black women. We are not inpenetrable, or made of stone. We are women.

I appreciate you showing your vulnerability, and expressing sadness and regret. It shows that you were a woman who put all of yourself into your union with this man. A woman who had the very best of intentions and was in it for the long run. And no amount of monetary compensation can change that.

Please, plant your feet in the ground firmly sister. I know it feels like

[reemixmedia]

you've had all of the wind knocked out of you. All of the strength and fight sucked out of your spirit but I know you'll make it out of this alive.

[zellcurrie]

I sympathize with you so much I cant imagine the pain you're going thoiugh this is one of the main reasons I decided not to get married because I'm afraid of this kind of pain, but you will move on and find a new man this will pass my dear god bless you

[serenityfindingme]

Hi dear, please don't feel sorry about not being strong all the time for everyone else. You are human and what you're going through is hard (for anyone). You know I know. I heard something a few days ago that helped me a little during one of my "moments". They said "I know it's hard but try not to look at this as the ending of something, but instead look at it as the beginning of a new life for you and see only the positive side of it." Feel better Sweetie!