Doug Stanhope - You're Taking the Wrong Drugs

[YaHozna1]

He was great on Screenwipe on the BBC. Did a bit about a chimp ripping a woman's face off, was hilarious.

[wowzers57]

This guy, and Joe Rogan fucking wrecked The Man Show

[CertifiedGooner729]

@wowzers57 Doug admitted that it sucked. They didn't give them the freedom to do anything they wanted.

[SloppyManwich]

"Maybe you like a purple meat hammer wailing in and out of your untrimmed, winter ready, New York sludge pot, and that's fantastic!"

[AhmadAAD]

Don't take a pill take the Cock.. Maybe your Clitoris is there for a reason.

[sep800wastakenwtf]

Does this guy just pretend to smoke or something? He never actually takes a drag

[Izdigger5]

@sep800wastakenwtf

Haha, I've never noticed that

[moreoreos123]

This guy....isn't that funny....at all

[jeezuschryst]

@moreoreos123 are you fucking kidding me??

[moreoreos123]

@jeezuschryst No, I'm 100% serious. I heard about him somewhere and decided I'd check him out cause i like stand up comedy, and he's not very good at all.

[jeezuschryst]

@moreoreos123 well than you're an idiot

[moreoreos123]

@jeezuschryst Doug stanhope sucks. That's why the man show as canceled after he took over as one of the hosts. This is some of the worst stand up I've seen. I believe it's a must that you have an IQ less than 65 to think this shit is funny.

[jeezuschryst]

@moreoreos123 the man show always sucked. he was hired to write lowest common denominator jokes that even he hated doing. what fucking comedians do you like? carlos mencia?? i suppose george carlin sucks too?? you dumbfuck.

[moreoreos123]

@jeezuschryst LOL no i hate carlos mencia even more than i dislike Doug Stanhope. George Carlin is probably my favorite comedian. I like good comedians, Stanhope just isn't one of them.

[jeezuschryst]

@moreoreos123 well you're still an absolute fool

[Nautilus1972]

@moreoreos123 yet, knowing that, here you are on a stanhope video ....

[moreoreos123]

@Nautilus1972 I clicked this video because I never had seen doug stanhopes stand up. I watched it and didn't like it. I didn't know prior to watching the video that it was going to suck, jackass.

[FooledToaster]

@moreoreos123

Fuck you.

[xyzoneon]

@moreoreos123 Is that the review from someone with a full 65 IQ? Thanks for the input.

[owlcu]

There's a saying that only two kinds of people tell the truth: children and drunks. Neither are around for long, so get it while you can.

[kylometa72]

hahaha dont take the pill, take the cock

[cedartowndawg]

Don't take a pill, take the cock!

[hallower123]

this guys great dont take the pill take the cock

[neoYTPism]

To be fair, a pill wouldn't get her pregnant or give her STDs like "the cock" could. o.o

[jubajee]

@neoYTPism Humans have invented this thing, its called a condom and its invented over 400 years ago, go figure.

[neoYTPism]

And are you aware that condoms don't always work? @jubajee

[jubajee]

@neoYTPism Yes i am, but its the risk im willing to take to have sex. People can take pills to sexually repress themselves, but that is not my thing. Condoms are still a really good way to protect urself from STDs.

[MaikUniversum]

@neoYTPism but pill will get her addicted probably for a lifetime. Considered it?

[rnhtt8]

@neoYTPism To be fair, "the cock" doesnt present any risk of addiction the could get someone so fucked up that the person using them harms themself in some way.

[seebali]

this guy expounds on bill hicks man

[kingxciter]

doug and bill hicks would be good friends!

[ElectricIndica420]

new york sludge pot! haha

[MrJorgeantonystride]

"purple meat hammer wailing in and out of your untrimmed winter ready new york sludge pot"

[afreuden]

Come see Doug Stanhope at Lakeshore Theater in Chicago on 3/5 & 3/6 at 7:30 & 10:30. Call 773.472.3492 for Tickets, only $25!

[ImUnder18Really]

I fuckin love this guy. It's like I have finally found someone with my way of thinking.

[StSIZpanX]

then u should check out george carlin=)

[parabola1212]

@ImUnder18Really yes carlin and my personal favorite bill hicks

[W00lyBully]

check out bill hicks and george carlin!

[PabloG1987]

Hi there,

I'm translating "No Refunds" into spanish,

and I'm having problems with some of the lines (Doug Stanhope is fucking hard to translate, to say the least, but I think it's worth the effort) so I was wondering if someone could please help me, for starters, with his line at 2:23-2:35.

I understand some of the words, but others just escape me and I would like to make the most accurate translation possible.

All kind of help will be welcome.

[notAbohab]

cuz u like the purple meat hammer wailing in and out of ur untrimmed winter ready new york slude pot

[PabloG1987]

@notAbohab

Thanks a lot, dude.

[bdh826]

Your question is very hard to answer. It's not the elite's fault things are this way. Things are this way because the masses are not paying attention. It would help if people stopped watching TV and listening to ipods 24/7. Greedy people will always exist, so the rest of us must remain vigilant. This is hard when most are concerned with aquiring trinkets and baubles. You can't blame it on the illuminati. People need to take personal responsibility and stop acting like the government's children.

[fibbsabaddy]

I agree with every word you have said but remember that the money system used to be the way you describe and poverty was still rife. The important thing is you are pin pointing the attack and that is needed. The fact we may disagree on the aftermath we can come to later. For now we have work to do. Peace

[SiliconBong]

Thank You bdh826.

People who blame it all on the 'illuminati', or the 'BohemianGrove' or the Freemasons are fools*.

Whatever happened at last years Bohemian Grove has nothing to do with the choices they make in their lives. Will *they try harder to see everyone as equals today? Whatever happens at local Masonic Lodge won't matter either. Will *they be patient with everyone they meet today?

And what is known by the'illuminated ones'is entirely irrelevant towards taking personal responsibility.

[scdlbrdr]

You act like television, products, religion, and whole variety of propaganda isn't being pushed on people. It's pretty clear masses are kept this way in the interest of other people.

[scdlbrdr]

Lol " not the elites fault" what a bunch of garbage. They make the decision that affect you and people around this world the greatest. Yes people need to take responsibility, take responsibility and stop the ultra rich from raping this earth further and further.

[Freefallfelixrulz]

@scdlbrdr to quote mr stanhope on the subject of saving the planet 'Dont fuck in the front hole'.

Do your bit

[bdh826]

If energy technology was allowed to develop at a normal pace this would empower the lower and middle class. The powers that be are not in this for profit (they already have all the money they want). They seek more power. We could build desalinization plants all over the world. Everyone could very easily have access to drinking water and irrigate farmland. "They" can't let this happen because they would lose the iron grip they have over certain populations.

[thishanw]

Stanhope is king!!!!

[supercool514]

Stanhope is the greatest comic alive!

[SyndicalistTimes]

@supercool514

I agree, since Carlin went.

[VarMeNo]

@supercool514 agree.

[freethinkerdangerous]

MAYBE YOU JUST LIKE THE COCK!

hahahahahah

[Arcand651]

hey stanhope, you got any funny jokes?

no, not really

[irtimed]

what a clever comment.

[Clembo]

I got a joke for you.... LOOK IN THE MIRROR!!!!

AHAHAHAHAHAHHA HA HA HA HAAAAAAAA HAHA HA H AHA HA ha ha

huh ahah hahah hahahahahaha ha.... ha!

[queensNY2185]

who do you think is funny?

[ar904]

I'm not sure funny has much to do with it.

[supercool514]

You wouldn't know funny if it ass-raped, cuntt ass coccksucker

[StarchildSF]

That sounds great as far as it goes, but it won't stop new tax and fee increases from passing, more people from getting arrested for breaking unjust laws, get the innocent people already incarcerated out of jail, etc. Electing more pro-freedom candidates, passing good ballot measures and defeating bad ones, are practical steps to alleviate oppression. Some relatively pro-freedom people have been elected; if people with pro-freedom values didn't vote, the average elected official would be worse.

[ivegotmyknobout]

proo he IS funny when he's sober!

[Pittounikos]

All true for a clever few. This is obviously the case. But it wont turn the proletariat into a higher race. Pseudo Nietzsche.

[StarchildSF]

If you dig what Doug has to say and get that he would make a much better U.S. president than one of the anti-freedom establishment politicians, go to PetitionSpot(DOT)com/petitions /stanhope2012/ and sign the petition urging him to run!

[thousandlegger]

he'd be assassinated before the primaries. voting doesn't change shit.

[StarchildSF]

It's easy to dump on the merits of voting or any other strategy, but the one thing that's certain is that doing nothing accomplishes nothing. What are you doing to advance the cause of freedom? If you think getting Doug Stanhope to run for president would somehow be a bad thing, and you have a better idea of how to get government off peoples' backs, step right up to the plate and let us know!

[thousandlegger]

the only thing i have come up with is living under the radar with love, community and self respect. it is an excellent alternative not without its hiccups. if critical mass is achieved the house of cards will collapse into itself it seems. a practicable theory but not much more. it seems the unsustainable society we live in requires a fundamental shift in intent. otherwise we are all ass fucked slaves voting for our next puppet overlord.

[fibbsabaddy]

Could not agree more. It sounds like your talking about the venus project.

[Hashishin13]

The Venus Project is communism with better technology. If it is ever created, it will be a totalitarian system within 50 years. Libertarianism is the only way forward.

[fibbsabaddy]

Libertarianism is flawed as is every system that involves money. It always leads to control and an abhorent enviroment. Why not give it a try? We have tried everything else. Besides it is not communism. It recognises that we are all one and that the earth is all of ours. Besides no-one would be in a position of control and there would be no point as there would be no money.

[Hashishin13]

You obviously haven't looked at this from all angles. I would suggest you go watch some videos by Thomas Woods, so you can understand what the free market actually is. You are basing your claims on the modern world which is at best the bastard son of capitalism and socialism and at worst, a horrible system of debt induced slavery run by a small group of power hungry elites.

Your idea that ending money will put an end to power is frankly laughable.

We aren't going to all suddenly become hippies.

[fibbsabaddy]

The end to money could not and would not happen overnight but it would need to happen as it is the basis for all corruption. If I am a butcher and the butcher next door sells better meat I wont tell you about it. As I understand it that is the free market. This shows that at it's root it is corrupt and a deliberate withholding of efficiency. All self preserving institutions are corrupt as they serve that which their system perpetuates and not the pursuit of truth.

[bdh826]

I agree with fibbsabaddy. Banks having been screwing us for years. Because they're "too big to fai,l" billions of our dollars are used to bail them out. Now they will continue to screw us. In the Christian church it is a sin to charge interest (making profit for nothing). Why not give that money to the people. 1 trillion spread evenly would equal $3280 each. Or they could just not tax as much.

[fibbsabaddy]

Thank you bdh826. I think Jaque Fresco put it best when he said Christianity is a great idea. When are they going to put it into practice? (Just the good bits mind.lol) Interest was invented by Christians and carried out by Jews as they follow the old testement. A book which says that you cant eat a prawn sandwich. I would laugh but it's hard when the whole of the human race is enslaved because of it. Have you checked out zeitgeist addendum?

[bdh826]

I have seen it. It has some good ideas, but I have also seen other videos where it is picked apart. In my opinion, movies like ZA get people thinking but send them down the wrong path. What needs to happen imo is for EVERYBODY to realize what's going on. Right now there is just a fraction of us with this new mentality, but we are increasing in number rapidly. Once everyone reaches the state of openess and attentiveness that we have, a real shift can begin and it doesn't have to be like ZA.

[fibbsabaddy]

Ok. Then what does the shift eventually need to be and where do we start? I would be willing to accept that what the Venus project proposes is far reaching and that nearer aims could be easier to focus upon but what are they? 911 Truth? The myth of man made global warming? Technological unemployment? Interest and a fractional based money reserve/debt? Where do we start?

[bdh826]

First, get rid of the FED and return the power to print currency to Congress. People need to realize that the government is not responsible for taking care of everybody's problems. Madison stated that if the phrase "promote the general welfare" was misinterpreted then things would get out of hand. This is what happened during the New Deal era. We need to remove troops from the Middle East immediatly as well.

[arianabanana83]

haha amazing. i love the cock.

[CatAtomic99]

This is actually a really good point he makes here. Drugs that help you be a better cog are perfectly legal.

[comradechristophe]

he was relatively sober for his dvd usually he is faded,

he has alot more emotion when shitty

[PeaceLoveEternity]

LMFAO I love this guy!!!

[StarchildSF]

If you like Doug Stanhope's ideas, please sign the petition urging him to run for president! petitionspotDOTcom/petitions/s­tanhope2012/

By the way, seeing Doug live is well worth it. I went to his show in San Jose last month and he was in fine form! His upcoming shows are listed at dougstanhopeDOTcom .

For those who "get it" on a deeper level and want to know more about the libertarian philosophy, this video gives a good intro - isilDOTorg/resources/introduct­ionDOTswf

[merjguitar]

yeah like that'll work

[Dr420Clonex]

Lmao LMAO LMAO LMAO " you like that purple meat hammer in ya"

LMAO LMAO. this guy is outragous. 5 stars

[killahprophecy]

from 1.00-1.20 it looks like his fighting for a toke lol xD

[hendrixman1515]

thats just a cigg

[cd1str013r]

That dude fuckin rules!

[ajr4888]

Stanhope has to be one of the best comedians going today.I'd put him right up there with the likes of Louis CK,Rogan,and the other big "alternative" comedians out there.

[deadgent]

maybe you just like the cock!!!! is that possible ???

ahahaah great line !! :)

[faxdaddy]

I came here to say that!

[GallowayJesse]

Marijuana is illegal and you can't overdose on it. While the tax on alcohol helps pay for the roads people get drunk and crash on.

McDonalds KILLS, but the FDA doesn't mind medicine companies charge you out the ass for LEGAL METH in the form of diet pills.

[jarrett2005x]

Suck a dick!  LMAO!!!!

[Jotto999]

This is awesome. Great message, most people are sheep-people. Gotta do what the other sheep are doing, right? Can't stray from the herd. Can't be an individual. :-\ I hate society.

[greensheep99]

me too, & whenever someone tries to do something about they get killed. Can't beat the system unless you have an army behind you.

[hornetobiker]

+ 1

[longfingernail]

You can stray from the herd just fine. the only pre-requisite is having metaphorical testicles =/

[Jotto999]

Yeah. You need to take your sense of embarrassment and smash it. I guess being an "eccentric" individual does take quite a bit of balls.

It's something I aim for in life :)

[MeatwadGETdaHONEYSg]

I agree he does remind me of Bill Hicks. Funniest comedian I've seen in a while.

[MyRainFlake]

Indeed he does. Some are arguing about him being the next bill hicks.. I dont know, they take a different approach on their comedy, but to be honest, they both tell us important facts, and speak about life etc. What I mean is, they both give you something to think about while we can laugh at it.

[theguywiththehair1]

I'd go ahead and say he's the closest thing to Hicks we're likely to get any time soon. Their approach is different, but they are very similar in the joy they take in messing with people's preconceptions and telling it like it is. They hold back nothing and make no apologies.

[Passenger87]

Well the poet understands both sides the trauma and the beauty.

[drongovids]

he's funnier than hicks

[GrungeRock1991]

definitely not, he's close, but lets not get carried away here

[Rorschach313]

he reminds me of Bill Hicks. I hope he goes far, we need another Bill Hicks kinda comic again.

[likeacidonthebrain]

"This country is so bereft of imagination anymore" soooooooooooooo true

[manateesanssanity]

Free fucking Fun! hahaha, Doug is an amazing comedian.

[droppedyursoap]

"Thats what it's there for its free fun"

XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXD­XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXD

[Archulerus]

Maybe you just like the cock!!

[i811st]

yeah,pussy!

[RichGilly]

"Don't take the pill, take the cock"

Brilliant!

[tuktuktok]

At my currect job I collect shit from shelves to a cart. They're in alphabetical catalogue. Everytime when I come to a new shelf and need to sort them trough I always vividly hear Doug saying "A, B, C, D, E, F, B bla bla bla bla" in my head and think what the fuck I'm doing... Doug knows man, he knows...

[AbbeyNormal]

I get that too doing my mindless file clerking. In fact I'm watching this at work on the sly. It's a lot better than prescription drugs for making the work day go by, that's for sure :D

[tuktuktok]

Allow me to promote audio books for you. I listened to dozen in my work and its a great form of escapism! Seriously, give it a try unless you already haven't.

[AbbeyNormal]

Might be something to look into. If I can find them cheap. Sometimes they're really expensive.

[sacredthornapple]

Dont you get it? He's bashing escapism.

[tuktuktok]

No hes not. Just listen to the two first sentences and you find out what he bashes, working too much to some lame corporates. He's an escapist himself if you listenet to him a bit.

[EasyCocks]

2:22 chya

[numbchucking]

The best living comic we have; love this guy, his albums are amazingly addictive

[TheGloriousNosebleed]

Ahahahaha, PURPLE MEAT HAMMER.

I love this man. He's so true.

[eurabio]

He is too similar to Bill Hicks. Needs to be more original, he even speaks like him.

But he is a nice guy... we more of them.

[arngrei]

He's like Bill Hicks meets Andrew Dice Clay.

[cornsockgabz]

How imaginative that you likened him to an imaginary hybrid of two other comedians. You're only likening him to Bill Hicks from irreverance and social commentary, and I presume Andrew Dice Clay because... I don't know why, he's just terrible.

[arngrei]

What a whiny little gimp you are. Andrew Dice Clay because he has a filthy mouth, what did you think?

[shakersman]

Right, but Andrew Dice Clay's comedy practically revolves around his stupid filthy mouth crap whereas Bill Hicks and Doug here just happen to swear a lot WITHIN their brilliant comedy. It's a bad comparison I think; he's more of a modern Bill Hicks, but less involved with politics and Bill's giant philosophical meanderings - Doug is just spewing highly entertaining, typically lurid social commentary and he's just .. great. Dice Clay sucks.

[Hostile]

Actually I think there's a Hicks similarity in his body language too. Look at the way he wafts that cigarette. Yeah I'd say he's definitely Hicks-ish. Still, you'd be bull-shitting to call him an imitator, unlike Leary he's clearly his own man with his own jokes. More power to him.

[jonasnilaus]

...meets Charles Bukowski

[ExtraCholesterol]

i come from a military family so i didnt have a stable male role model in my life.

[seanbedlam]

i am fay and gay.

[RaidenTheAlmighty]

Youre a Stanhope fan sean?

[secretnaughtybedlam]

Yes, and I'm also fat and gay, apparently. I have no idea why I wrote that. Must have been drunk.

[RaidenTheAlmighty]

Youre my favorite youtuber, it makes sense you would be a stanhope fan. I see some similarities in the ranting =D

[seanbedlam]

Well, thank you, and thank Doug for being a dirty, filthy, lovable inspiration. :)

[RaidenTheAlmighty]

Hes a true roll model for the children.

btw, what time is it in your crazy land?

[seanbedlam]

Just after 6pm. Just did 15 minutes at the gym, realized I was bored, purchased beer, and am now home to haunt the internet with my lack of motivation and true grit.

[RaidenTheAlmighty]

yeah, ever time check youtube early in the morning I see youve posted a video recently. I figured there had to be 9-12 hour ish difference. Ive been up for a while trying to draw a portait of doug but i just keep failing =(

[paulcdallas]

He's definitely got a lot of Bill Hicks in him, but that's not really a bad thing. He has an interesting spin on a similar outlook on life. If you need to wear an influence on your sleeve and you're a comedian, you could do much worse than Bill Hicks.

[KalinaNoeva]

dont take a pill, take the cock! :DDDDDDD

[Perfricate]

Agreed, hahaha.

[M00s3r]

I prefer the cock to aderall that's for sure.

[drexsyl7]

i hope you are female.

[tripppeisenn]

haha thats what i was thinking.. and you got 6 thumbs down for saying that lol

[RenaissanceRoss]

i know must of been a lot of gays who gave him the thumbs down. lol

[tripppeisenn]

hahaha too true..

or are we watching a gay comedian?!

[analcarbomb]

comment ratings are fucking gay

[etmadness1]

When tripppeisenn and drexsyl7 are out gay bashing, the rest of us are gonna be at his house fucking his girlfriend. =)

[Seedr0]

Any sane straight man would also prefer the cock to aderall.

[andrewh817]

i cracked up on MAYBE YOU JUST LIKE THE COCK

[gregdog550]

i love this guy even though he cracks on us truck drivers, hes still the bomb, everything he says is so true, and hilarious, i think he should be our next president, we need someone like him

[Sicklesale]

I used to be on every pill he just mentioned and he's 100% right about each of them. I quit that shit and now I only do illegal drugs. Complete lifestyle improvement.

[rocktheflow]

I'm a drug user as well, but why do you need any drugs to be happy? Happiness should be able to be found, drug-free. Drugs are just a nice way to ramp it up a notch every once in a while :)

[Sicklesale]

I agree with that. If you depend on any substance, food or drug, to be happy you're not doing it right. When I do do drugs I like to take something away from it. It should be life that brings you happiness, and drugs that bring you novelty. Prozac never works.

[Sicklesale]

I agree with that. If you depend on any substance, food or drug, to be happy you're not doing it right. When I do do drugs I like to take something away from it. It should be life that brings you happiness, and drugs that bring you novelty. Prozac never works.

[rootpepper]

I bet he read Food of the Gods

[Seedr0]

ROFL! I was so gona say he is McKenna inspired!

Awesome stuff.

[rootpepper]

hehe :)

[NielsVE07]

He is cause he does actually read Mckenna. :)

[joemacdonald16]

yeah man, doug stanhope is a fucking genius.

[OniJsF]

The genious is back in action! No bullshit. Of course they do it because they love the cock! No therapy needed, no pills. More cock!! Live your life the way YOU want to! It's YOUR fucking life! Why should you be miserable because someone else says so? Fuck everyone else!! I still say Doug would be the best president! Evolution stopped when Lincoln freed the slaves, it's time to climb the ladder a bit further. Agree?

[brentdos]

it really is that simple...!

[brandonthyname]

I agree. Over here in the U.S., we so need to stop being so Puritan--at least the system--and being more open abour our Sexuality, cause the sexual need is as natural as eating & shitting and pissing, being hungry, ect. It's our natural instinct to wanna reproduce kickin' in several times a week or day, what have you, ect.

Again another classic Stanhope bit. Can't wait to get this new DVD ...

[comicstripped]

So true it hurts, he said, writing from his cube.