Retsufrash - Arise 4 (1/2)

[leonhart423]

Paging Dr.Zombie!

[MrViewer9000]

umm.....Deer call

[khalidbrain]

لي



[coffee115]

YOU'RE NOT LOGGED IN INTO THE FOUNTAIN

[r0bz0rly]

hey, audacity at 1:37

[Asbduhas]

That part where you clicked out of the window was the scariest part of the whole series.

[EpicFailGirl]

Wait, what happened? I was on another window.

[Plooontey]

Is it just me or does one of the sounds that play when the jpeg's are hit sound like Goron-Link from Majora's Mask.

[punisher154]

I can't help but imagine Slowbeef and Diabetus walking through this maze, solving these half assed puzzles, and chatting about how dumb this situation is while 'fighting' the JPEGs. That's really funny to me for some reason.

[lich109]

@punisher154 I like to imagine slowbeef is drinking a beer while he does it shooting half heartedly, which kinda holds up as you can hear him set something down whenever the gun come out.

[Anthony3PO]

Did anyone notice that Arise 4's final battle health hearts are the same as the ones in the final battle of satanorium?

[lich109]

@Anthony3PO Out of curiosity I google imaged searched "human heart", it was the fifth fucking result.

[lich109]

Every time Slowbeef pulls out the gun, I imagine him pointing it at the creator:

*Jpegs show up* "For Fuck's Sake." *Click*

[MrUrsudude]

Fuck this game.

[incredicassio]

Hey JPEGs, what's your relationship with Rita?

[wabitgirl]

55 shots, one boss kill. Fuck that

[posthumanfetus]

It's legitimately hilarious how completely unimpressed slowbeef is with the pop scares. He doesn't get scared, just sort of pissed off.

[ZiloTheStrange]

4:14

"Oh, for fuck's sake..." *cocks gun*

That made me laugh pretty hard.

[XLR21000]

i like how they use resident evil music in this series

[GlAcKeNbUrGeN]

WELL, TIME TO MAKE AN ARISE GAME

*searches Halloween masks*

[bullethead2202]

@GlAcKeNbUrGeN Wow, I google image-searched, "Halloween Masks," and things that he would use were actually on the page.

[Kuronji]

The game got so depressed it decided to kill it's own jpegs.

[qawmame]

Wow. so you shoot some of the pop scares, but not other ones?

[Zknight7126]

Ibwould dislike this video if there was no commentary, but that applies to all retsuruprae vidoes.

[Macmon33]

Those 2 keys you first get are probably the first keys you got in 1 and 2 that you never used

[bangsgeorge860]

this guy now really sucks...its a shitty resident evil

[EternalGuardian07]

11:57

To quote an episode of MST3K "Any ending will make me happier than I've ever been"

[lich109]

@EternalGuardian07 what about the ending where they announce another somehow shittier sequel?

[KingBrawnzProduction]

I like how Diabetus and Slowbeef start their Arise series gameplay commentary, whether your logged in or not.

[SparklePrincePeasley]

"My next installment will make you want to die."

Well, you know something's bad when even the intro admits it.

[littleNorwegians]

I have a confession to make.

I love retsuprae, but I recently made a flash game.

A point and click adventure game.

And mofunzone is sponsoring it.

I'm quite torn. :P

[fuandon]

@littleNorwegians Do random jpegs pop up in arbitrary locations? If not, then I'd say you have a leg up on the competition!

[lich109]

@littleNorwegians what's it called?

[DayBreakization]

@littleNorwegians What's it's name? I've always wanted to make an adventure game. How hard is it? I tried Action Scripting a few times. Not many people survived. And after watching this video, now you know what *not* to do in a flash game, so I wouldn't worry at all.

[littleNorwegians]

@DayBreakization It's called Bestia Fabula. NOT my best work (Badly programmed), but I am making a better point and click game now. (You can see a bit of it on my channel, excuse the channel whoring).

It IS actually sort of hard in some respects, but depends entirely on what you want to do. This Arise game seems to have been made with no idea in mind and, well, to use the one gun-script they had. :/

And yes, these are great indicators of what not to do.

Though I am still in danger of Retsuprae

[EternalGuardian07]

So I was trying to find a video that shows getting the Golden Ticket (no luck though) but I found something else. The final boss is a photoshop of Obama.

[speedingtime]

Audacity? I'M ON TO YOU RETSUPURAE!

[buneter]

0:05 that yea sounded like sirronlionheart

[leviathan1173]

I sorry, but I was late to these Retsufrash's, can anyone tell me why there are so many jokes about Meet N' Fuck Kingdom?

[DayBreakization]

@leviathan1173 They play most of these flash games on Newgrounds. There's a "people who played this also played..." on the side, and they show a list of games. 4 times out of 5, one of the suggestions were Meet N' Fuck Kingdom.

[leviathan1173]

@DayBreakization

But do they actually make the joke themselves?

[DayBreakization]

@leviathan1173 Once or twice. It's kinda like a running gag. I think it first occurred in the Trapped retsufrash near the end. Or was it Arise? I know it was one of them, but I don't remember which one.

[leviathan1173]

@DayBreakization

I didn't hear them make the joke in either one.

[DayBreakization]

@leviathan1173 I finally found it. The joke can be found at Retsufrash - Metroid Elements, the second part near the end. watch?v=YEf3ZdUANhE There were more instances, but I can't find them.

[leviathan1173]

@DayBreakization

Thanks.

[JanitorAntisocial]

@DayBreakization

The first instance of their discovery of Meet N' Fuck Kingdom was at the end of the Arrival In Hell II playthrough.

I'm glad they never succumbed to the fandom's ignorant demand of this game. I actually played this shit when I was young and stupid and an insipidly superficial dating sim reject with frenzied mouse movements for limited sex scenes with anime girls really isn't Retsupurae material.

[JanitorAntisocial]

@DayBreakization

Oh goddamn it. I did some research and I was mistaken. Meet N' Fuck wasn't the one I played since it came out in 2009. I played something else, which is no doubt the same premise anyway.

Oh, Newgrounds.

[DayBreakization]

@JanitorAntisocial It's kinda sad how Meet N' Fuck is a series on Newgrounds.

[Reyson129]

'Ahh, for fuck's sake.'

*cocks gun*

This is how I will remember the Arise series.

[JanitorAntisocial]

Right after they've addressed the danger of clicking out of the window, they click out of the window.

Assuming that wasn't staged, that's some impressively comedic timing.

[DayBreakization]

@JanitorAntisocial It's a post commentary, so I think Slowbeef had written down what he wanted to say when he screwed up in the recording.

[SomeDude1403]

any one else notice the music is blatantly Stolen from S.T.A.L.K.E.R.

[jsh020]

@SomeDude1403 its just a reminder from the developer that you could be playing stalker instead 

[Hiryuk]

@SomeDude1403 Actually it's from Resident Evil 1.

[jettythesunfish]

These JPEGs are so idiotic. I swear I keep expecting JPEGs of Mickey Mouse or Pikachu to pop up.

[EponymousKid]

Also, it's a little strange how the only thing that doesn't kill you with one hit is THE FINAL BOSS.

[TheToast7]

@EponymousKid Also not all of the JPEGs in Arise 4 actually hurt you, so you're only vulnerable sometimes.

[EponymousKid]

So, wait, in the previous Arise games, the JPEGs were actually physically there... and the player character was simply invincible?

I'm having a hard time justifying the fact that all of a sudden the bullcrap jump scares are actually there and can kill you. Why didn't they kill you before in any of the other games?

[lich109]

@EponymousKid Well I think the cure for the LETAL virus was what made them able to hurt you.

[armegeddis]

WOW...that was...horrid...

[LEW2X]

Good grief that constant loop of the Main Hall music from Resident Evil 1. The JPEGS. The plagarism and terrible game mechanics in this. I just can't beleive that there are four of these. Bravo on the retsupurae though.

[Cloaytonem2]

The entire Arise series is like my cat.

It likes to jump and startle me, and has a distinct love for drawers and keys.

[XGiftedGamerX]

@Cloaytonem2

lol good one.

[twistedzombie5]

you guys are funny

[Zukaran]

You gotta be logged into the mofunzone.... Its only fun if you do!!! or they will put jpegs in our gamez!

[HelpfulYoshi]

This game series should be called, "Attack of the JPEGS!"

[TheToast7]

I never though I'd see a game that makes the trapped trilogy seem well programmed and enjoyable.

[Goodguy33]

@TheToast7 At least Trapped had Dan McNeely.

[elrobotbastard]

That's the same life counter as Death Trap, isn't it?

[TheToast7]

@elrobotbastard You're thinking of Satanorium, and if it's not the same one, it's very similar.

[TruKriegsaffeNo9]

Sixty. One. Bullets.

[greyspot00]

I love how you don't even react when the "scary face" pops up. The most we got was a chuckle from your cohort :D

[Goodguy33]

2:01

You're not logged into the fountain! NOW DIE!

[CayDubyaSee]

I love slowbeef's exasperation with every enemy encounter.

[genericman7060]

I like how the creator of the game couldn't figure out how to make a sequel to Arise 3 so he had to break the fourth wall in order to get you in the hedge maze.

[TheProjectMJ]

My friend dared me to take a drink if I laughed, needless to say I got drunk and accidently pressed the dislike button 3 times... Sorry

[LumberjackBonanza]

When I saw the second form of the final boss, I just couldn't believe it. No matter how much you manage to lower your expectations, Arise 4 finds a way to under perform.

[ProudNoobs]

But, I thought that this wasn't a test and they put you here to test you?

[xWhiteClaudiax]

My God....did you two do Arise 3 and 4 in one sitting?

You poor things.

[Iwuznothere]

So is there any rationalization as to why the wild JPEGs in this game make bird calls when you shoot them? Like the guy was trying to make an equally bad hunting game and just freaked out and turned it into Arise 4 at the last minute?

[iheartskullz]

They need to resufrash qwop. It's pretty much the most terrible flash game ever, and the LP's are just as bad.

[vitralizer]

@iheartskullz

Boat-o-Cross...

[MichaelSaniyan]

This is truly the worst thing. It really is.

[anticlub69]

so in arise 3 he died and in 4 he's in the afterlife?

[FireJigglypuff2310]

The reason they hurt you, is that in the first three games, the character was just hallucinogenic, but the "letal virus" from the third game was not entirely cured and the character became insane, and believed the hallucinations were attacking him, and when he dies, he actually just kills himself.

[TAGMOMG]

@Dbkit Thanks, but, Er... it isn't really a Poem.

[goat210210]

wow dr zombie we love you

[deathnote3675]

hey everybody, whats your favorite j-peg?!?!?!?

[goat210210]

@deathnote3675 dr zombie

[3286headshot]

lol 7:01 fuck you ROFLMAO

[3286headshot]

arise 1 and 2 was pwnage but 3 and 4 was bullshit

[YayaIWin]

What took longer: Slowbeef vs. The Horrible Boss Fight in Arise 4 or Slowbeef vs. Mogenar in Metroid Prime 3?

[DrolKeegEht]

@Dbkit The fact that it's got even worse design than D2? Yep.

[RReviews]

Why do all the extremely evil zombies sound like whimpering puppies?

[EthVortexShield]

"My jpegs!" "Noooo!"

Diabetus sounded exactly like Jack Slate in dead to rights when Eve gets... killed by Patch. The resemblence is uncanny, just watch chapter 6 of their dead to rights LP on the archives and compare the two.

[Icerama108]

@EthVortexShield or in Dead to Rights: Retribution when ????? dies.

[hbomberguy]

This backing music, if I remember, is generic horror stuff that's used in an awful lot of horror games on newgrounds.

[Sarcasmitron]

I can't wait until he runs out of horror themed Halloween masks to use, and the player starts to be bombarded by spiderman and austin powers heads.

[MJ1284]

I bet that gate at the end leads to Meet N' Fuck Kingdom.

[sonicfeet]

"THEY'RE WAITING FOR YOU-- AND RIGHT AT THE BORDER™"

[pyramidheadkitten9]

@MJ1284 i love it when comments can make me laugh as much as the original video.

[GoldPlatedDildo]

Those jump scares are so stupid, next there going to put up a picture of "pikachu" and expect me to be frightened.

[CrackNImO]

@GoldPlatedDildo

well the creator of arise made pokeman ...so .....

[thedarkroadtoheaven]

200th video guys, congratulation!!! This game really deserved the retsupurae!!!

10/10

[eji313]

laughed my ass off at 2:01

[OriginalLemming]

This was painful just to watch, I would never play it.

[TheToast7]

200 videos! 200/10!

[hararaldur]

the floating heads make somekind of a dolphin/horse sound

[inferno232]

The virus made you invincible while killing you also

*Read in best "Full-Life Consequences" voice*

[BigJuicyx3]

I don't think I can trust Slowbeef when he says how awful this game is. He's not fucking logged in. I don't trust those ruffians that choose not to log in.

[facelessaphrodisiac]

I think a piece of my soul died.

Goddam stupid bitch ass flash games.

You suck.

[garrahasfunk]

@facelessaphrodisiac add a 10/10 at the end and you got a newgrounds comment

[gaaraxdancing]

Every time you collect something, the game makes this little disappointed "tsk" noise, like "Aww, man...I can't believe you actually want to complete this...such a waste of time." It knows it's bad. It doesn't want to be played.

[joejoerg]

someone actually likes this game??????

[SilverEnchantress]

Maybe the Golden Ticket will replace the stupid Halloween mask JPEGs with Willy Wonka head JPEGs.

[maneater96]

also:

The jpgs are made not because they didnt let on load up in Arise 3,but because they skipped one in arise 1

When you unlock the door, instead of going through it and ending the game, go back to the one room with the lamp and another jpg will pop up.

They didnt show that one and so the jpgs here try to kill him but fail miserably.

[DrButler]

I can't endure watching these horrible games. I have another tab open, and I listen to your commentary, so that I don't go blind watching shitty flash games.

[eski514]

Is this game self-aware?

[sagacious03]

What an awful game. Seriously, no boss should take 52 hits to beat.

[Dannybomb]

My monitor doesn't turn on, but my gute feeling tells me teh ghame is perferrct. 10/10 aka  4/5

[maneater96]

*jpg pops up*

guy logged in on mofunzone:8/10

[CalBro]

This was painful just to watch someone else play. What a piece of shit.

[MrZebraGamer]

I think the MoFunZone is a complete mistake. Its a typo and they meant it to be NoFunZone.

[ADBHLS]

7:36

Slowbeef 'ad went so fast in the previous game that the time gods paid 'im a visit, and gave 'im the ability to slow down time!

[BartS4177]

lol i didnt no wat 2 do aftr i got the first gear, lol is to confsing nd hard.

10/10

[TAGMOMG]

I am a flat pic. Bitty, with an open mouth, with white balls where my eyes used to be. no arms; nothing rounding down into nothing. I leave a shit trail when I move. Blotches of jump-scare come and go on my surface, as though stupidity is being beamed from within. Outwardly: dumbly, I Arise, a thing that could never have been known as scary, a thing whose shape is so dumb a scare that horror becomes more obscene for the vague resemblance. Inside: Alone.

I am a JPEG, and I must scream.

10/10

[xplay108]

@TAGMOMG I love you for that reference. That is my favorite early PC game han.

[thevisualboy37]

@TAGMOMG You forgot to mention that you have no mouth.

[CayDubyaSee]

I see the fine folks behind Arise still aren't above ripping off music from Resident Evil. 9/10

[sportsfan723]

i got too scared after seeing the "MoFunZone" logo pop up, that i shut my computer off. 10/10 and 5/5

[FinalGamerJames]

To quote Freelance Astronauts:

"I like how as you shoot the boss, he turns more flamboyant." Goddamn this is terrible.

[KyngHalibytt]

The last boss should have been longshoreman x in jpeg form.

[Brian12327]

I screamed when I saw the gun and I couldn't play after that.

10/10

[Grogum]

My entire being was so filled with hatred and revulsion upon playing this game that I vomited blood with rage until my body was devoid of all fluids, then compacted my now empty dry husk into the back of my face.

I am now a pop scare JPEG, and absolutely hate my entire existence. 10/10

[shoplifting1is1fun]

@Grogum

Hahahaha

[Firebrand101]

man maybe in Arise 5 there'll be a new level of horror: animated gifs

[tabrismacbeth]

I understand the story now! See, you're a doctor working to cure FLU, which were released by open drawers and unleashing the carriers: JPEG pop-scares. The JPEGs are like double reverse ghost zombies that exist in parallel dimension...which you can see if you have FLU! You have FLU and to stop the source of FLU, you have to send your spirit into the JPEG dimension and kill the queen JPEG. But how did this all get started? It was Obama! This was all part of OBAMACARE!

-Tabris

[JmdMagic]

"...Kill yourself before the next game. Trust me. TRUST ME. GO KILL YOURSELF BEFORE YOU PLAY ARISE FIVE! HURRY! HURRY!!"-Says the developers.

...Retsupurae, please, end our pain.

[Doperwtje81]

I thought the pop-up faces in the previous ones were annoying, but god damn they got nothing' on Arise 4!

[GregEdgar88]

that boss fight was painful to watch, but i bet it was so much worse to actually play

[Doggie501]

Another awesome video retsuprae!

[MJ1284]

Hmm, this game looks fun but it needs more JPEGs.

And cowbell, don't forget the cowbell.

[koy3333]

4:32 They just can't stop shooting Gandhi

[ENM173]

I picture the protagonist of this game as sighing and rolling his eyes every time a JPG attacks him

[azzadoc]

What sound recording software do you use?

[OMFGSLAPPYWAG]

@azzadoc audacity

[Unknownhero1423]

If you ever read slowbeefs "lets play" of Metal Gear 2 on his website, you'll find out he REALLY hates mazes. Especially invisible ones.

[OMFGSLAPPYWAG]

@Unknownhero1423 i thought i was the inly person that read that xD

[ZeroRaider20X9]

For f*** sake.

[bloodriotiori]

Pretty sure this game just gave me cancer....10/10

[TheSkunkrocker]

@bloodriotiori Breast cancer?

[bloodriotiori]

@TheSkunkrocker Breast cancer.

[Reyson129]

@bloodriotiori Ahem... breast cancer.

[bloodriotiori]

@Reyson129 Breast cancer.

[PickpocketSan]

The "You're Not Logged In" popup is scarier than the JPEGs...

[lma0er]

The ultimate horror: To play Arise 4 all over again

[Agentbromsnor]

Isn't the boss-face that mask from Donnie Darko?

[CloseEnoughToSane]

@Agentbromsnor Nah, it's got a vaguely similar texture but it's not remotely close to Frank's mask.

[danbri28]

Woo 200th video on-the-record!

(That hasn't been wiped off by white-knighting).

[MadSurge]

00:50 never have wiser words been spoken. That fucking key took me forever to find, and after that I wanted to kill the creator by going "BOO" at him and give him a heart attack.

[DayBreakization]

8:29 Wait, why couldn't you just shoot the lock?

[MadSurge]

@DayBreakization THAT WOULDN'T BE SCARY! And it wouldn't be totally retarded.

[nado1908]

@DayBreakization also because guns dont work like that

[DayBreakization]

@nado1908 How about just climbing the gate itself? The guy who made this was being way too lazy.

[nado1908]

@DayBreakization wait, why are we trying to make sense into this "game"

[steveharley0345]

1:36

Oh slowbeef....

[DayBreakization]

Man, "Darkness" is scarier than this game. Come to think of it, "Escape from Monkey Island" is scarier than this game.

[BenjaminEllett]

Also it uses the Resident Evil mansion theme.