MST3k 519 - Outlaw of Gor

[EternalGuardian07]

1:03:16

Sometimes a phallic statue is just a phallic statue

[dynagirlsdaddy]

There is one, and only one good thing to say about this film... As much as I love the books, there's a strong chauvinistic streak in them, while in the movie, the female lead (and most of the other female characters) are portrayed as strong, but feminine women. Other than that, the film is dog vomit, so Mike and the bots make it at least fun to watch

[Hobbes0331]

HAVEN"T SEEN A BETTER SONG IN A MOVIE SINCE MARY POPPINS! (43:00)

[Doug31415]

Isn't this basically the plot to Gladiator?

[CrystalsandCandles]

Good books, great lifestyle (kajira for sale, cheap. Chains extra), awful movie...

haha Except for the MST3k version. Thanks for posting this

[MPSecare]

this is the best of the worst by far. Everything about this movie screams "B"

Is it like.... English dubbed in English? What the fuck is up with that? hahahahah

[montyburns9991]

@MPSecare this might have been one of those productions where they filmed w/o audio, and dubbed later.

[Hobbes0331]

@MPSecare- English dubbed in english, that looks about right, HA!

[montyburns9991]

He looks like a happy pig!!!

Callback to Mrs. B Natural??? Most assuredly.

[montyburns9991]

I worry about a superhero named Kevin who drives a Camaro... wait a minute... this was 4 years before "Hobgoblins"!!!!

[exoskyflyer]

Fabio!

[shockraid1]

Cabot Cabot Cabot Cabot Cabot Cabot Cabot Cabot Cabot Cabot Cabot Cabot

[montyburns9991]

@shockraid1 LOLOLOL

[Walrus563]

"Come pour the midgets!"

[Anynom]

"Sorry, folks, we simply could not afford any special effects."

[RrachelEedwards7878]

1:12:29 --"I brought the wrong bowl...." lmao

[RrachelEedwards7878]

this movie is SO bad; can't imagine watching it without the riffing

[Kitschensyngk]

I saw this episode on one of their college tours. They played it in the theater in the Memorial Union at the University of Kansas and my mother took me to see it. I was nine years old.

[TheDeadhead76]

I remember the chevy chase show and it was bad,like watching someone drown puppies.

[ToyotaGuy1971]

@TheDeadhead76 drown puppies, i thought you said it was bad

[Vortigern99]

At 42:45 begins THE funniest song MST3K ever committed to videotape.

[RandomEncounterFilms]

Who's that guy?

[pythonagm]

can someone tell me the main characters name they never mention it.

[ggami7]

TGI - DIEDAY

[textthing]

I love the unintentional bathos of the opening - something also to be seen in Deathstalker - where the grandiose music of the titles is succeeded by a thoroughly dull opening, with the protagonist just hanging around waiting for the plot to begin.

[vinnyv0129]

Harry Alan TOWEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRSS!

[fantacybab3]

Scotch make it a double no ice! xD

[OneThousandWorlds]

Man, oh man... Cabot's gotta be the bronze medal to Ben Murphy and Deathstalker for the Most Punchable Douche-Hero in these movies

[textthing]

@OneThousandWorlds

He's not that annoying, he's just an ineffectual idiot.

[benjaminthefox]

CABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOT­CABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOT­CABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOT­CABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOT­CABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOT­CABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOT­CABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOT­CABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOT­CABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOT­CABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOT­CABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOT­CABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOT­CABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOT­CABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOT­CABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOT­CABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOTCABOT­CABOTCABOTCABOTCABOT

[badjimmy68]

is it wrong that i laugh reeeeaaally hard whenever servo cries ?

[greg589]

If you thought 300 was gay you'll love this!

[Hakkai87]

Oh God! Did Gypsy start, "...and that's why we can't have nice things." meme!?

[TheAccountsSuck]

that's why we can't have nice things is as old as time. it also has two apostrophe's which makes it annoying to type. thanks.

[opticalgoo]

did anybody do a cabot count

[textthing]

@opticalgoo

Someone said that it was about 83.

[ANGMEM1]

It also resembles Pod People.

[ANGMEM1]

This movie resembles Zombie Nightmare....

[ANGMEM1]

HOW DID I MISS THIS EPISODE? I"VE NEVER HEARD OF IT!

[jonahfalcon1970]

NAKED CAME THE NUDE!

[Catmando2022]

One of the old king guys looks alot like one of the king guys in Lord of the Rings

[Catmando2022]

Crow T. Fabio...wow

[cartmanrlsusall]

analog kid you are my new god i renounce the mighty sock and praise thee

[Blamepandora85]

This is truly an awesome piece of crap.

[Blamepandora85]

Holy shit! This movie is fucking great! It puts anything Ed wood did to shame! And this is a sequel! They actually did another one simply called "gor."

[switch1979]

reception @ about 20:00... was it too much to ask to get a shot where an extra isn't hiking her dress back over her boobs in the background?

[analogkid01]

@switch1979 - yes. Yes it is. It is too much to ask.

[Demendred1605]

I have to say I find your descriptions quite funny

[analogkid01]

@Demendred1605 - thanks, Steve Martin is my ghost writer.

[MrTheMuck]

@analogkid01 ... but he isn't even dead

[shandelear]

heaving



[kittykatBflat]

we have worm sign lol

[scitsalcoryp]

My seedpod is ope ing

[scitsalcoryp]

Fucking Cabot FUCKING CABOTCABOTCABOT!!

[terranova210486]

12:01 "We have wormsign." LOL!

It's a Dune referance if anyone's wondering.

[cartmanrlsusall]

@terranova210486 moad dib i just shot you its a misspelled dune reference if you are wondering

[KecharaDraygon]

Freekin funny. The movie itself was horrible... but considering its a sequel and the people who made it have NO idea when it comes to the actual books... yeah... hehehehe it is worth the watch!

[Knollyka]

This maybe a strange question but anyone got an idea what the music is at 0:54:25? freakin' love the solo

[Nero5th]

the whole concept of gor is hilarious

[cartmanrlsusall]

@Nero5th tried to read slave girl of gore when i was a teenager,didnt make it past the part where the earth chick was howlin to be spanked and gangbanged by her massa,,,it was to dumb or i was too black.

[textthing]

"Help me choose my trousseau."

No one ever seems to get that.

[TelevisionsFrank]

KILL HIM! KILL HIM! KILL HIM!



[hebahabahobaheben]

I love that "kermit" voice they give that midet

[hebahabahobaheben]

That Queen may be evil, but she is the hottset babe on Gor!

[Ihatethisugh1]

56:54 "This must stop!..first thing Monday morning."

[hebahabahobaheben]

19:46 "Dissssmount!" HAW!

[hebahabahobaheben]

if that nerd says, "Cabot!" one more time...

[electronfun]

Apparently, life on Gor is fraught with complications and difficulties. And, of course, Jack Palance.

[laura71193]

Looks like one person is a DISCUSSING WORMMMMM!!!!

[Zinnober]

CABOT! 

[Yapshire]

The editor must have ADHD.

[benjie414]

stone age technology - but they had hair gel

[samsullithegenius]

"TGI Die Day!"

[PikachuColoredPichu1]

Kill him, kill him, kill him, kill him...

[Wyrmwould]

The trident used at the end during the final fight looks exactly like the one used by the Cyclops in Krull. I wonder if it was the same prop.

[EdwFam2010]

where r the 'great floors' refs from??

[LaLongeCarbine]

The direct sequel to this movie? Angel's Revenge!

With Jack Palance starring as Jack Palance!

[Windclaw]

This is just one of those movies where it's better if you don't try to figure out the 'plot'.

[Ci3lag0]

12:00 "we have worm sign" they never did knock over Dune. Too bad.

[RussianPhantom24601]

@Ci3lag0

Dune is way to long. I don't think they ever did a two parter.

[jordanowen42]

Pay attention Goreans- Mike, Crow and Servo's lines are what the rest of us are thinking when you assholes get all high and mighty about your little franchise.

[80MWH]

Ok, Jar-Jar Binks was annoying, but Watney Smith beats him by a mile in my book.

[RrachelEedwards7878]

@80MWH Agreed!

[Majorbludd817]

"So a woman can be free to feel for whoever she wants?" "That's what it says in Cosmo." lol.

[holycrapadinosaur]

I love their impressions of the evil priest guy.

[tehking1000]

"I have come to chew bubble gum and kick ss, And I'm all out of ass" ... Man, these guys even reference Duke Nukem? Nice. The boob song was funny too.

[metallicamoose]

@tehking1000 They're referencing the film They Live, which is the movie from which Duke Nukem gets the line of "I'm here to kick ass and chew bubble gum, and I'm all outta gum."

Another fun fact: In They Live, the line is actually "I'm here chew bubble and kick ass, and I'm all outta gum."

[Majorbludd817]

@tehking1000 It's actually a reference from the movie "They Live".

[Imawizardbro]

"Where the hell am I"

"You're the hell here"

[Imawizardbro]

Mystery science theater is still one of the best shows that was ever created. Simply because it was just brilliant in so many aspects, the writing was impeccable and I really miss it. There will never be a show like mst3.

[Shepherdd]

I love how old the humor is in this movie, the guy who wrote the Gor books was born in I think the 1920s, it was like the studio thought the guy's geriactricism was the reason for the series success and not the massive amounts of graphic s&m.

[pretorious700]

@Shepherdd geriactricism?

[Shepherdd]

@pretorious700

Geriatric: people old enough to be turned into soilent green.

-ism: pertaining to.

[GeishaShattori]

With all the t & a in this movie, I guess it's only fair that we get to see a little something for the ladies: Mike in a sailor suit! (Rrrrrowwwrrrr!)

[applebonker141]

@GeishaShattori HA, I never thought of it like that. Wish we could see Mike's still from "Oh, Calcutta!", though ;D

[theblacksheep1000]

this show was, and still is 1000 times better than any pathetic shitty reality show or stupid sitcoms of today!

[WhiteTiger225]

1:16:00 "The Tarn will only answer to me" Now, this coming from someone who hates these 60's Twighlight Fap Fantasy style books (Gor series)... The tarn only Listen's to its male Trainer, and whoever the trainer may train it to listen too (They are giant Birds) Also, even without slaves, the Goreans would ALWAYS Take a MALE WAR HERO's word over a FEMALE LEADER any day.

[baronshober]

I miss Turkey Day.

[SpiderMwa]

Oh geez, some of the music in this movie I've heard in a movie called The Barbarians, aka Barbarian Brothers. And that movie is a thousand times better than this one.

[TexasSheepdawg21]

You gotta hand to the MST3K crew... This movie is almost impossible to watch. The only thing that kept me going was the chicks and the skits during their breaks. Otherwise, I would have needed a bottle of hard liquor to wash this one down.

[ComCodex]

Give Jack Palance a hug. He deserves it.

[tripdefect87]

Oh god, I fucking lost it when they accidently filmed the IOWA backdrop

[Camalot777]

Like this if you got the Jesus Christ Superstar reference.

[TheLackofattack]

I CRAP BIGGER THAN THIS MOVIE!

[joethehero2]

Karuva?

WE ARE THE SPESS MAHRINS. WE ARE THE EHMPERAHS FURY!

[PCGamer77]

2:40 Tom's fall makes me laugh out loud every time I see it! It's so classic. :)

[aczilla]

Just to go along with the awesome parody of USA Original Movies in the end credits, a REAL one from 1996... Tori Spelling in "Mother, May I Sleep with Danger?"

[Tareltonlives]

Anyone else laugh at the Thomas Merton joke?

[PCGamer77]

@Tareltonlives Yes, I did! It may help to have had a religious education.

[Tareltonlives]

@PCGamer77 "I'm not playing Thomas Aquinas...I'm supposed to be some kind of freaking wizard!"

[PCGamer77]

@Tareltonlives Heheheh. God bless Kevin Murphy and his Catholic jokes.

[Tareltonlives]

Watney Smith went to the Night at the Roxbury school of seduction

Despite all the exploitation, this is actually a lot more progressive than the novels.

Planet of Gor? No wonder it's so lifeless, although you'd think it wouldn't be so dessicated.

I love their Jack Palance impressions.

Best dialogue ever:

"Because YOU are acting like a BITCH in HEAT, and NOT like a QUEEN!" "GET OUT OF HERE, YOU DISGUSSSSSTING WOOOOOOOOOORM!"

[applebonker141]

@Tareltonlives I do that exchange with my younger brother, who is also a Mistie, especially when he's in my room. :P

Him: Do you have a Q-tip?

Me: Yeah, over there. Now GET OUT OF HERE, YOU DISGUSSSSSSTING WORRRRRRRRM!

Him: XD

[Makron5]

Keep it circulating, it's in copyright hell so it's not like this stuff will ever be released.

[originaldudeman1183]

 BOOOOOOOBBBBBBBBBBBSSSSSSSS!!!­!!!! and asses.

[amcint01]

"WHOA! Jack, you are WAY off script!"

[christimacc]

How many times was the name "Cabot" spoken in the first 15 minutes of this movie. YIKES!

[RichterTheEternal]

So, Cabot's main purpose in this movie was just to rely on the Fates, wander aimlessly, get captured by the antagonists and not really do anything too much to stop them? All he did was scrape around with minions, save only one slave girl (Reasons unknown. Because she's hot?) and get treated like a slave. Sheesh! For a well known otherworldly hero of Gor, he really sucks balls in the tactician department.

[tangocolt02]

@RichterTheEternal Best description I've ever heard for Gor.

[Raithious]

@RichterTheEternal You seem to have forgotten something very important: if this was a GOOD movie, it wouldn't have been featured on MST3K. :P

[RichterTheEternal]

@Raithious True, true. LOL

[Raithious]

@RichterTheEternal I do fully agree with you, though, the hero of this movie does nothing but walk around with a midget. And as for the 1 slave girl they save for no specific reason, she's never seen again! After the Hunter captures them she just kinda....disappears. So apparently he freed her from a life of slavery (life being the keyword) to get her killed.. All in all the only people the hero actually defeas are two or three guards at the beginning and a couple of fat guys at the end.

[KakkoiiSasuke]

Whose leg is that?

[sleepyhollow783]

43:05 Crow: "Is it Gluteal-Maximal, Tushital-Crackula, Bun-U-Morning 'till night?"

The song is shear brilliance.

[ArmorArmadillo]

So, does anyone else notice that, when Cabot bravely deattacks the slave market, his glorious act is to save 1 hot chick and leave all the rest?

[textthing]

@ArmorArmadillo

Note also that the tent he sets fire to has been helpfully primed with what looks like petrol, in exactly the right place. 

[sleepyhollow783]

The really short guy seen at 33:25 & elsewhere looks like a compact version of "The Nature Boy" Rick Flair!

39:51 "Watch out for snakes!"

[terminalsoup]

I've gotta fever, and the only prescription is...more Cabot!

[ChaoticYak]

Get out of here...you disgusting wooooooooooorrrrrm!

(That line is perfect. :)

[ChaoticYak]

HARRY ALAN TOWEEEEEEEEERRRRRS!

(Last seen in The Castle of Fu Manchu)

[TheSkunker]

"You can catch more slaves with honey than you can vinegar!"

[waveurfreakflaghigh]

I miss turkey day! :(

[pezizzle1]

OMFG STOP SAYING CABOT

god that part was grinding

[THiNGYBOBinc]

"Why not ask the king?"

"I don't want to marry the king!"

[bruxbrux]

Man, Cabot looks a lot like Jeff Dahmer, it's really distracting.

[Unwyze]

I dunno who is less likeable, the guy that never shuts up or the spoiled bitch that always gets her way. She sure had an easy time framing Cabot, she didn't even have to try!

[TheLackofattack]

I think they got their entire soundtrack from a Mechwarrior 2 disc.

[stickynicque]

"where is the prisoner?"......." they canceled it...it was too obscure"

hahahaha seeing as I know the books well.....this is the funniest thing Ive ever seen! they couldnt have made it any less like the book if they tried!

[TwiztidRoman]

Lol Did Tom call Mike a dink??

[HoserSaysWhat]

Cabot! Cabot! Cabot! Cabot! Cabot!

Sheesh, it's turning into Cabot: The Hands of Fate

[MackintoshRJ]

@HoserSaysWhat Cabot? Cabot! Caaaabot! Cabot! Cabot has come, my darling! Cabot!

[eviljoel]

@HoserSaysWhat Except Torgo is a much more memorable, lovable character.

[jordanowen42]

What I don't get is why Tarl Cabot is such a sexist pig in the books and here he's all noble and heroic. Ah well.

[AnotherProfit]

@jordanowen42

Tarl Cabot grows into his sexist pig character as the books/stories progress, he is noble & heroic (mostly) for perhaps the first dozen tales. This, if you remember, is Talena;s biggest gripe with him, even after he travels across the world to free her from peril she replies by demeaning his foolish 'sexual-equality honour'.

Her treachery , and his slow awakening to the reality of the Gorean females sexual needs, eventually harden him. If you'll excuse the intended pun.

[jordanowen42]

@AnotherProfit I see. That makes sense- I tried reading Outlaw of Gor, which is further on in the series, and by that point he struck me as a truly vile, disgusting cretin.