Cracked TV - 9 Child Prodigies Who Are Clearly Dangerous Mutants

[krazykdnb]

HAHAH!!!! I'm glad that doesn't happen to me when I use my guitar tuner!!!!!!!!!

[StanleyBradshaw]

who knew a guitar tuner could double as a laser remote? :D

[dsriggs]

"scissors"

[princeofbohemia]

Why did you censor Bitch but not Fuck?

[ssjover9000Brolunks]

That kids Blues doesnt have any Soul.

[gizmodude117]

Why does this show only get under 100,000 views? This is way better than most the crap out there on you tube.

[MegaBigCack]

@gizmodude117 it has like 1.5m views on crackd

[cheezball1998]

Hey did you notice most were Asian

Yeah me too....

[Govadina]

1:48 hahahhaahhaha

[MrMrbubbles213]

about 90% of these kids were asian

[paulcalebcanyon]

"...You smug son of a b----"

[MissCaitlinEee]

these kids are no threat to me! they're just good at artsy crap and i own a BATH.

[Razzics]

1:44 - 1:49

I fell out of my chair

[MasterPenguin20Three]

I have that exact same laser cannon remote! Mine only tunes guitars though. Sad face.

[SolSilence]

@MasterPenguin20Three ME TOO!

[carlosperezvidal]

that t mobile bitch is pissing me off shes in every ad i see...

[Silfsilfsilf]

scissors

[metalmugen]

50 persons were watchin porno and eating gorditas

[Kveli100]

when his art and music started playing i busted out laughing

[arimen5]

BE GONE DEMON CHILD :)

[KricketKid44]

You just shutoff my computer you smug son of a..... BE GONE DEMON CHILD and hand me the laser ointment.. oh thats right... You got stabbed..

[Imnoatube]

You Smug Son of a..

[pseudocaveman]

.. was your 'laser cannon' remote a Korg digital guitar tuner?

[ithotnihtwhh]

These are some truly amazing kids. I enjoyed the clip much more once I turned the volume down during some of that jackasses monolouge.

[D3AD5PAC3L0V3R]

Dear lord he's a SUPERMAN!!! lool

[evilmamaluigi]

the last kid must've been pretty stupid if time travel was possible, why has no one ever met a time traveller?

[ThisIsHallStar]

@evilmamaluigi Would you believe them if they told you?

[MrGojiralee]

@ThisIsHallStar If someone is intelligent enough to travel through time, then they will know to bring proof.

[blade10000]

@MrGojiralee Unless they don't want to fuck with the time stream. Or want to keep a secret.

[MrGojiralee]

@blade10000 That's ridiculous. It's very obvious what would happen if we discovered how to travel through time. Ppeople would go back in time and show off their fancy laser underwear(that's still popular with the kids, isn't it?) to the confused people in the past. It's human nature.

[IKickAss4DaLord]

@evilmamaluigi Because you could only time travel back to when time travel was first made. Thus making useless for 5-10 years

[fromdaghettowithlove]

Hey Swaim I wrote it in blood on your wall...

Why havent you yet done *The 8 Reason why Micheal Swaim and I should totally hook up*.

[GoldenArrow222]

Its funny how  more than half of them are Chinese or something.

[blackjack2boy]

Did anyone else notice......most of them are ASIAN!

[1010111101]

0:24, Dude. SPOILERS!!!

[Fyrzon]

@1010111101 Well, anyone that doesn't know that scene obviously doesn't know what final fantasy is. I hate that game and still know more about it than I know most games.

[IrinaRamova]

he looks like the guy who plays Reverend Steve Newlin on True Blood! A LOT!!!!

[andybpiano]

I've watched this video around 5 times over the past few months and this is the first time I've noticed Swaim use the phrase "Watching porno".

[qbalaqss]

For the record, the government would rather target the child prodigies, those who are actually dangerous.

The middle aged bum watching tv on his couch is safe.

[peckjo3]

stupid

[rifleblade1]

@mindstormsabrewin the girl who does the painting comes from a atheist family so.............. but lets all assume that any child from a Christian family is forced to do everything even though its a direct contradiction to the Christan way of life

[val2zs]

YO JARLIN!

[BBoyZega]

" you smug son of a b..... " hahahahahhahahaha

[soldatheero]

@mindstormasbrewin you cannot teach or force these kinds of talents upon someone you fucking idiot

[lukebaumer]

Was that a KORG tuner?

[Chloeissocoollad]

"BEGONE DEAMON CHILD!"

"what regretable life desions do you ache to reverse?! did you forget to tape Arthur?!"

LOL!

[hellojulie]

the pool kid, holy fuck. i couldn't do that if i was given 5 years

[leon6777]

"what kind of girl you looking for?"

"TWO BALLS BETWEEN THE LEGS"

"YO JOLINE!"

[ArcticRush]

Where was that spoiler alert on Aeris dying you son of a bitch

[pinkjaguar95]

@ArcticRush If you don't know that by now you've obviously beat prodigy #1 in discovering time travel.

[BLACKIESBOY]

@ArcticRush

That game is about a decade old... Why the hell haven't you played it yet?

O.o

[ArthurZ101]

4:22... WOW! HE CAN FALL ON HIS FACE!!! D: We're fucking screwed now!

[SorceressRin]

@2wo3hree1ne Actually it depends on the translation. Because in the original Japanese the names was pronounced Aerith but when translated over to English they decided to make it more 'normal' and called her Aries, they are both variations of the same name so it shouldn't matter anyway unless you're a traditionalist.

[MayerEO]

BWAGAHA at the laser ointment part!

[c4r50n1]

I'm better at guitar than that one kid. Jesus, when someone our age picks up a guitar and play smoke on the water they act like it's a big deal. The other kids on instruments were amazing for anyone, though.

[shibbytron]

i wont say im real good at youtube comments.. but.. im pretty good :)

[i2die4x]

8 is hot

[p30123456789]

@i2die4x plz tell me your a kid.

[oneofthousands1994]

40 people failed to comply...

[Hikarabita]

number 6 punchline was obvious, lol

[kenoran2]

lol laser canon firing mechanism = guitar tuner :)

[BigDamnVanguard]

Michael sure gets shot in the arm a lot.

[VastedCouth]

Cracked's videos are never as funny as their articles.

[p30123456789]

@VastedCouth true but they are still funny as hell

[imTKA]

Guys, please tell me - what is the last video? The breakdancing kid that is.

[bloodr0cuted]

"SCISSORS"

[danjoelabrenica]

awesome scissors XD

[dj999dominator]

Haha Komo 4.

[RoflCopterAce]

Lol your laser remote is a Korg GA-30 electronic guitar and bass tuner.

[Martinntoxx]

"You smug son of a-"

[HeartAttack1990]

That remote... is a guitar tuner, right?

[AmyJayn]

Did you see that kid!? He is a BMX Machine!!!

[Sivspecial]

What regrettable life decisions do you ache to reverse? did you forget to tape an episode of arthur? HAHAHA

[traxdata94]

this one's blind

[arenakitty]

How boring and ignorant. Get a life.

[feligirl01]

i looove that pool kid!

[Raguram2323]

ur gay

[runawaycaveman]

The laser cannon was a guitar tuner. lmao.

[genjyosanzo23]

The MURDER KIDS!!!!! Lol.

[thecursedgirl13]

...you smug son of a bitch!

[xephyr1000]

Are you sure those were suppose to be scissors?

[Tyton]

4:41 -> end = awesome.

[pvtxpotrenko]

the idea of hitler....the experiment ''die glocke'' was an undelievable thing i read....good that this good is working on it ....time travel....thats what scientists want to understand....they just want the time traveling part of the experiment ''die glocke'' not the part where all the nasty and bloody things were done

[ThePsychoticScyth396]

those kids who think they see god.... WHY DONT THEIR PARENTS DO DRUG TESTS!!??

[UberMan5000]

Child prodigies seem achingly common now, don't they? Friggin' rapid cultural advancement...

Also, "Yo JOLENE!"

[lulzlaby]

im no longer a cracked virgin!!

SUBBED!!

[LegoWorldCrisis]

LOL! ive never seen you before, but you crack my ass UP!!!!! lol subbed.

" what aching horrible life memories do you want to reverse anyways?!

what, did you forget to tape an episode of aurther?" LOLOLOLOL

[B1JCH]

thumbs up for scissors lol

[MrIGIVEFREESUBS]

you smug son of a .... LOL

[Gaffas93]

The pimp bit was fucking incredible.

[Xesum]

Is this the Michael Swain creator of Blockhead?

[UberMan5000]

@Xesum No, this is Michael SWAIM. Different person.

[Theultimategeeks101]

I LOL'd at "BE GONE DEMON CHILD!"

[VaeSapiens]

Well good for them, but the 1 kid will not achieve anything. There is a big correlation with all Nobel prize winners and actually normal life.

Einstein born 1879 Ph.D in 1905 (at 26 )

Feynman born 1918 Ph.D in 1942 (at 24)

Pauling born 1901 Ph.D in 1925 (at 24)

Dirac born 1902 Ph.D in 1926 (at 24 )

So If you want to acomplish anything you need to live long enough. Correct me if I am wrong, but did any child prodigy acomplished anything in science?

To my knowledge - zero, nada,nothing.

[PUPPYLUVE44]

@VaeSapiens Well there is that 10 year old in college studying science but I get what ur saying...

[HaloTrackStudios]

whats the music called from 4:18 - 4:26

[panjo23]

lol...old man face

[AceSkepTik]

Not enough content...too much annoying host.

[tomrox1523]

FINAL FANTASY FTW! not the new one tho...damn cheap.

[GamerGuyM]

makes me smile how they're these really sad child genius's on the news who will have no friends or social life whatsoever. HAHA SUCKERS!

[skateskate624]

BE GONE, DEMON CHILD! Lol

[colton12344321]

i hate that kid that is number 1

[RunningWithRum]

Oh, right...CLIPPY'S DEAD!

[dingaling1010]

LOL, @ the scizzors 1:47 

[firewalker117]

did you guys notice that when he went to fire the "lazer" that was a acoustic electric guitar tuner in his hand.. heh

[BrutalJamesLive]

@firewalker117 haha yeah i noticed that too dude

[lurch321]

Did the college kid ever prove that wormholes existed and discover time travel? Dying to know..........................­........

[bgatz008]

that last kid will rule the world =O

[72master]

i am a super mutant kid to ..... i can take really big bong hits :P

[dragonreborn1000]

hahahahaha ur funny man!! loved it!

[XxAngiexXRPI]

WE'RE DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMED KIDS ARE TAKING OVER THE WORLD, AND WHAT'S WORSE, Is that these little kids are doing what I've always wanted to do...play music :'( and then you see that kid being kickass on the drums like they played it for years :( and A 10 YEAR OLD WHO'S A SOPHOMORE we are SCREWD and now the kid says it's just hard work I'm no genius. I can work my ass off in math and all the crap I suck at and I'LL NEVER be a genius. these kids are lucky.

[undeadsos5]

damn that kids 10 and he's in college! we are all doomed

wonder if he's getting some ass

[riseup20twelve]

a crock!!!

[mlstyl123]

this is dumb

[sekula1999]

this video is too funny :)

[BAGreat01]

YO JOLIE!!

[iCantSay]

"he also shit his pants every day less then ten years ago" HAHAHAHHA LOL best part

[ShadowSlayer103]

lol " is so good a blues guitar, he"s already got old man face "

[ZeroPresicion]

seriously fuck these people who say god gave them a gift really?

[reaper9812]

that "laser cannon" is a guitar tuner

[tyhnbgtyhnbgt]

they're not so smart when you kick their asses out on the street for a week or two! muahhh!!!!

[holycow818181]

Does anyone else, upon seeing the numbers with exclamation marks after them (e.g. "5!"), instinctively see them as factorials (5! = 5 * 4 * 3 * 2 * 1)?

[xAdri85x]

@holycow818181 Anyone who does that sure is a huge dork, mate! :P

[abliko93]

We are DOOOOOOMED!!!! DOOOOOMED i say!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

[MCwackyJ]

0:26 hahhahaha he shows aerith getting killed by sepiroth XD

i feel so nerdy for knowing that

[XxAngiexXRPI]

@MCwackyJ lol don't feel bad I noticed that too. speaking of which, WHY IS AERITH IN KINGDOM HEARTS IF SHE'S DEAD IN THE FINAL FANTASY GAMES? weird right?

[TheMitchellgrhm]

lol aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh were gonns die hahahah

[mindstormsabrewin]

Check the progress of these kids 10 years from now when they are all either on drugs or in nuthouses. Mommy's little overachiever is going to blow a gasket and climb a tower with a rifle if you hollow-hearted, success-obsessed slavedriver parents keep bludgeoning them with religious toned brainwashing about their "gifts". Then making kids feel as though being "ordinary" is not good enough to earn your (or God's) love. Recipe for a nervous breakdown.

[Halo4Lyf]

@mindstormsabrewin Agree totally. These parents need to let their kids know it's okay to relax and not take life too seriously some of the time. After all, God did decree a weekend.

[Becatsup]

@mindstormsabrewin YEAH

DAMN SMART KIDS all those interviews made them look like lunatics.

We shouldn't help smart kids excel!

Also, sarcasm

[SirxChappy]

LOL funny shet

[FilmPA]

L.L

[originalbalex]

if knowledge is power and power corrupts this kid is basically hitler' XD XD hes like 10

[godbluffvdgg]

" jump over your fuckin head"

[Potemtole]

lmfao nice

[Beanmaster73]

i want to see a child prodigy who disproves the existence of god- that would be great

[gasmbay]

@Beanmaster73 nietzsche!

[braydenbeautiful]

we're basically screwed

[AlGlasgow]

You smug son of a

Lmaoooo

[DOGOFWAR777]

0:39

how the fuck..... ARE YOU WATCHING US?

[sarahlynn03111995]

this kids are real good man!but too bad video rather short dun get to really enjoy

[CarryLarry]

oh no those are not scissors :(

[abdool1972]

behind every child prodigy is a micromanaging parent.

[ARTAthletix]

Scissors!!!!

[kevinEZ713]

gorditas lmao

[AmaroMalta]

BEGONE DEMON CHILD!!!

lol!!! Awesome!

[ilikefoodxD]

BETTER THAN ELLEN DEGENERES?! NOWEIZ!!! :o

[XxInnoc3nc3xX]

LOL that was freakin' hilariousss

[kladivous]

That drummer was nothing. Tony Royster Jr. was way better when he was a kid.

[TheEddieJo]

He wasn't worried about the drummer he was worried about the kid on the bike.

[lambritt]

NOOOOOOO!!!!!!! There can't be a Mrs. Swaim. That was Ambition of Life! Well she's suseptable to the laser of death!

[EnigmaMyth]

LMAO

[Logitah]

I laughed my ass off when he showed his artwork.

Here's a montage of her artwork with music she herself composed *sappy paintings, sappy music*.

And here's my artwork set to music I composed *random doodles, DONG DONG DO DO DO DO DO*

[mrdaym]

@Logitah I was sitting at the office when that segment came up and couldn't help but start laughing like a raging lunatic.

[Logitah]

@mrdaym Nice to know it made you laugh, because bwahaha! XD

[SuperDuperGir]

YO JAOLEEN!

lol

[SuperDuperGir]

Um, clippy was a chick!

[ZomgL33tZors]

Clippy does animated pornography

[zekeymanRS]

Omg this is funny as hell XD

[dancenekkid]

"...you smug son-of-a-"

ha ha!

[ama91290]

@dancenekkid Lol don't forget "BE GONE DEMON CHILD!"

Lmao

[Jd4uRyan]

your awful

[18MACHINE1]

I´m the most unlucky prodogy in all existence

[18MACHINE1]

comment removed wtf?

[aeaoGnome]

MICHAEL SWAIM RUINED FFVII FOR ME!!!

[UTAOUB]

I, too, am an older person jealous of all these new "genuis prodigy children." When I think of the chances I had & didn't take advantage of! But I'm stil aliv, stil talented...&stil yung-lookg! *As are u, GMS!) Besides, these kids WON'T b children 4Efr! Lik t saying goes, don't get mad...get EFN..w ur OWN talents! I hop 2 liv 2 b 105...& look 23! If I can just lose weit...  That kid w t time-machine can mak a lot of dreams com true if I can't do it LET him invvent it..so I can go back in time!

[cottonwhiskersuk]

No need to hate or even fear child prodigies. Michael Jackson, MacCauley Culkin, Butch Patrick, Jack Wilde, Gary Coleman...need I say more?

[avgnwatcher]

this guy is awesome. he's so funny.

[XxZeldaxXXxLinkxX]

llol

*Montage of deadly kids thaat know kung fu*

BEGONE DEMON CHILD!! XD

[DRESHILL]

the intro and end sucked. everything inbetween was funny.

[otkmaster]

lol!

[sedwaykid]

did you forget to tape an episode of Arthur?

LMAO

[FlippinSweetCinema]

who was clippy?

[TheUnhappyMeduim99]

Clippy is just the general name for a clip they play repeatedly throughout the video. It's a different one everytime.

[DismayOfficial]

youre funny as fuck

[crazmnke]

WHO ELSE CAN PLAY GUITAR