Added: 4 years ago
From: zergdaddy
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  • I really love this movie because, in the commentary, Uwe Boll lets cute puppies be in his recording booth, daaawww.

  • @Cellmate412162 yeah never said it wasn't your choice but uhhh ok, doesn't make it the right choice. Continue rewarding awfulness with money/success, see how that pans out

  • @TrojanGold1314 Heh, Heh... the bottom line is you're taking movies too seriously. Besides those movies bombed so it's only 1/1,000,000 of a difference of I buy them. Everyone decides what is the "right choice" for them. If you are on a quest to eliminate hilariously bad movies so that there's only good movies, YOU GET NOTHING!!!! YOU LOSE!!! GOOD DAY SIR!!!

  • @Cellmate412162 you deserve all the palms to all the faces ALL OF THEM!!

  • @TrojanGold1314 Look who's talking. The fact that you were bothered by my opinion and that you responded obviously earns you the all facepalms from the heavens and hells. Like it or not, there's millions of people who have guilty pleasures, and there's nothing you can do about it.

  • @Cellmate412162 oh yes i can! you just wait!

  • were can i find this move

    i love this move so much

  • I never realized she pronounced Newfoundland wrong! :o Silly Tara. It's newfin-LAND, not new-found-land. :D

  • uwe boll is nothing but a nazi lovin, sausage gobbling, fudge packer!

  • For me, Alone in the dark and Bloodraybe are the 2 worst movies Uwe Boll has ever made. It's thanks to those 2 that I found out who he was and decided to keep an eye on what movies he was making so I could avoid all of them till he retires/dies.

  • You want to see a really, genuinely, hilariously bad movie, check out Bam Margera's "Minghags". And I'm saying this as a die-hard Jackass fan.

  • There's also some "Turning over tables" action in bloodrayne 2 as well 

  • @ lest the soundtrack was pretty good...

  • I'm going to horrify a lot of people, but I do own most of Uwe Boll's video game based films. Why?! Because they're so bad they're hillarious. For me the worst game based movie is the 1st Resident Evil movie. No graphic violence, pointless nudity, & I can't have fun with it at all. I believe Paul Anderson is becoming the next Uwe Boll with his continous anal-rape fest that is The RE movie series.

  • @Cellmate412162 good job paying for them, giving them more of a reason to make more shitty movies, ignoring quality even further. buying something for being shitty is probably the worst reason to own something, I would rather you own them because you genuinely think it's good, not because you think it's " so bad it's hilarious"

  • Comment removed

  • you will kill me, but for me, dorff and slater are great actors

  • Comment removed

  • oh my god it's tommy wiseau

  • @ClappingMao wiseau's long lost brother

  • Who is letting this never seen before dumbass make so many movies?

  • i like this movie but no way is it the best horror movie. in my opinion the best horror movies are made by the same company lionsgate and as of right now it is a Heptalogy with the seventh film being released on October 29 of this year. can you guess the franchise? hint: the movie coming out this year is the only film in 3D!!! guess the name of the franchise. i basically gave it away.

  • @FallofDarkness55 Your taste in movies is horrible.

  • @oloompop the saw movies are good movies, especially the first two. if you ever watch them you would realize it's not just about torture. it does have a plot and i like most of the endings. also i like scorsese, spielberg, kubrick, hitchcock, and tarantino to name a few directors. i like pretty much all of their movies they did. if you don't like any of those directors, then [lol]. and your taste in movies is horrible.

  • I like those directors you mentioned but I hate all the SAW movies just in terms of direction, acting and because I found half the movie predictable.

    The only thing I liked with the musical score.

    However, everyone has different tastes and to cmompare SAW with you average Uwe Boll movie doesn't even come close.

    SAW is overrated, Uwe Boll movies are pure shit. Big difference.

  • Dorff is, without question, the most brilliant actor of all-time.

  • 11 people actually like Uwe Boll

  • @PyramidHead333 OR Uwe Boll decided to dislike 12 times 'cause it was the best form of vengeance he could think of...if thinking is anything he's actually good at.

  • hooly shiit hahaahah those last 10 seconds made my laugh hahahaha

  • Once you make it down here alive, you are already dead!!

    hahahaha, cheesiest line I've ever heard

  • Venezuela, New-FOUND-land, Alaska...

  • Uwe Boll needs to fucking burn in hell.

  • Hehe Uwe Boll is awsome :D

  • Lol. "Tara Reid looks really intelligent with zuh glasses, I hope." *laughs* The laughing makes me think he's not convinced.

  • I just watched one of this movies. Some newer one " Rampage " i think is what its called. It was pretty haunting, and decently well done. Better than this one i guess.

  • im watching this movie again right now XD to bad not alot people like it. i like tho might be because i never heard of the game til 08 when the game was released meh

  • @project0omega Uh, I think it was released in 1992.

  • @Cossner crap that long?? and i havnt played a single one

  • 1:46

    But if you come down here dead, you'll become alive.

  • lol....are they trying to direct a porn movie? at least should get the gal naked....

  • why the hell did slater agree to do this movie?

  • Lol uwe fishbowl and tommy wiseau should collaborate a movie called oh hai alone in the dark :P, oh hai crappy director, oh hai tara reid not taking her bra off, oh hai over acting, oh hai script i picked up.

  • Jesus, this movie made the Zelda cartoon look like Gargoyles. It's just terrible.

  • My favorite part was when the guy fell down the hidden shaft to the "Once you're here you're already dead" room. The fall alone was probably enough to kill him but they just had to have him fall on a bed of spikes...cuz I mean, just in case ya' know. Hahahaha. Dumbass Boll

  • Uwe Boll.

    I fucking hate this man.

  • Woof!

  • I'm pretty sure when they said "Out of Context" about the sex scene, they meant the song about racism in Africa. So, yeah...

  • What's he talking about? You can easily find SOMEONE today in Hollywood who can take their clothes off for a movie somewhere. Besides the scene still didn't make any sense. It was so out of order since she seemed to be furious at him before.

    "Once you're down here alive...... you're already dead"

    That line alone kills me.

  • O_O Holy shit...

  • ...lol...who is this guy?

  • You should have included the part where Stephen Dorff underhand tosses the knife at the bad guy. It's the best part of the movie.

  • @SergeiEisenstein

    I enjoyed the nipple-rubbing scene.

  • Acting!

  • Uwe is a genuis.

  • Uwe Boll is the only fucking genius, he's Uwe Boll.

  • Uwe Boll is easily the most successful German director.

  • Uwe Boll+film=disgrace to mankind

  • I think Postal was the best movie he ever made. I hope to never watch any of his others solely based on watching this.

  • UWE BOLL=EPIC FAILURE.

    "Tara Reid looks really intelligent with the eyeglass I hope."

    WOW, even he has no idea or certainty on the look of the character and this is as he is viewing the "finished" product, lol.

  • Ummmm.... did she say "new FOUND land" instead of "Newfoundland" (noof-en-land)?

  • uwe boll should do battletoads

  • Never watched it and never I will. Thanks for the video I laughed for a good moment :D

  • 1:54 ACTING IN A UWE BOLL MOVIE!

    Holy shit.

  • Lol...the "Acting" part made me laugh so hard...tnks dude for giving me a good time :D

  • maaan...hate it when someone says "sät" instead of "that"

  • Lmao, yup that pretty much sums up Alone in the Dark pretty well. About how much you get out of the movie as well, God I still cant believe I sat through the whole movie.

  • Did Uwe boll quit School halfway or something? God he doesn't make sense! >X(

  • @toonrat Actualy he graduated from fucking University of Cologne(one of the oldest universities in Europe) in literature and in University of Siegen in economy, his movies are actualy just a cover for him to get free money from the German goverment(its sort of a trick to get money)and he's also a preety decent boxer. But his movies still suck ass:D

  • WOw. Loved the game, but this movie looks like shit. I kinda look forward to the next movie coming out next year though.

  • the movie IS shit... uwe boll needs to stop directing

  • lol. gimme one reason, why i should even speak to you again! BARK! lmao

  • Umm...I hope Uwe knows that 6 weeks does not make 3 months.

  • When it said "Acting!" at the bottom of the screen, were you implying that finally someone was actually acting?

  • Well, pretty much. Dorff was about the only actor in the movie who looked like they were trying.

    Also, I imagine Uwe told him something like "Vell, Mister Dorff, your character iss verry angry. Ve vill know how angry he iss because you vill turn over a table."

    Ben Kingsley's character in Uwe's Dungeon Siege movie also turned over a table. Not sure about either Blood Rayne movie. I couldn't make it through them.

  • YEA!!!, GET THAT FUCKING TABLE!! YAAAHHHH!!!.

    /palmface

  • its facepalm

  • Fission mailed.

  • XDDDDDD

    hahhahah

  • You know, in this vid, Uwe Boll sounds like a german Jar Jar Binks.

  • lol

  • A german Jar Jar Binks LOL good one

  • is this real commentary OMG this is the worst human beign on earth

  • "Once you make it down here alive you are already dead" Unfortunately they made it down there and the crapfest went on...

  • You guys have no idea. Its all one big joke. I love every minute of it.

  • F*CK YOU UWE BOLL!

  • newFOUNDland LMAO damn Tara Reid gets the Darwin award and Uwe Boll wins it every year. Yeah beat that table's ass! "Tara Reid looks really intelligent with eyeglass..I hope heh heh".....Ummmm no eyewear doesn't add brain cells.

  • yeah uber, or whatever. This movie sucked. It was a waste of your life.

    I remember playing the original game. It was suspenseful and gripping, this movie was laughable and lame. Nice try, but no way

  • WDF

  • omfg did she just say "new FOUND land" instead of "newfoundland"???? DUMB BITCH x 100000000000

  • Uwe Boll is so awful that he couldn't even get Tara Reid naked.

  • I think that's the best summation of Uwe Boll I've heard.

  • Acting!

  • Once you make it down here alive you are allready dead anybody else thought that line was stupid.

  • God, Uwe Boll really has no clue, does he?

  • i think that we can all agree that he's an idiot.

  • LOL

  • FUCK THAT TABLE UP!

  • ACTING!

  • Bless you, good sir, for includes those two lines of Tara's dialogue that are so incredibly cliche', you would think they were written by a 12 year old as part of a creative writing assignment.

    -Tabris

  • lol, Uwe Böll's commentary is priceless...

  • i hate you uwe boll. . . Lovecraft is puking in his grave you kraut son of a bitch!!!

  • Let's all hope Mr.Lovecraft comes back as a zombie and eat's uwe boll's brains out in his sleep. That would be SO awesome.

  • You captured it!! Tara Reid looks really smart with her glasses... lololol

  • :) great!

  • model entertanment!

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