steven wright, 06/01/07, miami, fl

[RikkiTikki350]

Chappelle kills all, you bitches.

[gary72carol61]

I wrote this song when I was 3 years old.

I think the Kittens trying to kill me, I better kill him first.

Good thing mammys sleeping, Where are the big Scissors!

LMAO the lyrics are brill and the fact it doesn`t rhyme..

[TheApolaustic]

"Snakes have no arms, that's why they don't wear vests." I am going to say that anytime I need to reason my arguments from now on haha.

[xavierpaquin]

i really like him, but i don't understand why he only does one liners... he's got quite a character going, he could do some more elaborate stories

[Takac1979]

SHEER GENIUS!!!

[thejokesonus74]

absolutely the funniest.

[donnypunani420]

" and that's how you do that"

[belisariusorb]

Still fantastic after all these years ... A comedy genius. Thanks for this glimpse

[jubileetunes]

amazing,

[keto6789]

Dane Cook= most unfunny comedian ever!

[peteisnotneat]

"I bought 1 walkie-talkie. I didn't want anyone to hear what I was saying."

[beginner4life]

lmfao snakes have no arms thats why they dont wear vests

[MrAlex2008]

what does he say at like 5:45

[CureForIgnorance]

"I went into tthe room where they keep all the coats and I hemmed the sleeves two inches."

[ocdpfsas]

After they drank the water, he went and hemmed the sleeves on everyone's jackets about 2 inches.

[islander1415]

zorilaz, he says, "my nephew has HD-ADD... high definition attention deficit disorder... he can barely pay attention, but when he does, it's unbelievable."

[Alkhir69]

*** it's unbelievably clear.

[zorilaz]

what does he say between 0:21 - 0:32 ?

[LisaSimpsonLover]

what did he say at 6:04?

[octivarium579]

i almost lost my arms holding a revolving door open for someone!!!lol

[nudist0885]

When I was a child I used to speak with a lisp. But now that I'm an adult I don't speak with a lisp anymore.......................­.....

Now I write with one.

[rustyrazorzbuck50]

listen to this joke i came up with:i would like to throw a brick through somebodies window with a note atached and when they open it it would say"fix your window"

[Burningbladex2]

"i kept tryen to hang myself with bungee cord...i kept almost dieing" Rofl

[TheSeventhStooge]

I got a paper cut from writing my suicide note... It's a start...

[Eirelav111]

When he sings "here kitty, here kitty" I almost died laughing!

[joekeith11]

this waz on comedy centrel

[mellowtribe]

i dincts it wazz komeedyes centrials dwqo cuz dint it waz

[Didgedy]

I love his jokes. You can't compare other comedians with him, because most of them are dumb and do just fart jokes, marrage jokes and jokes about other races. Steven is clearly an intellectual, he can make a joke out of 3 words and common sense, while other comedians talk for minutes about his/her girlfriend/boyfriend and in the end says nothing funny. I love Steven Wright!

[lovedarli]

Notice how he says "Thanks" and gets laughs... so you're wrong! He can make a joke out of ONE word ^-^ I LOVE STEVEN WRIGHT MORE!! >;o

[dcsmooth]

The monotone "Thanks" he gives at the begining of his sets is his calling card.

[numbr2wo]

No way man, Mitch Hedberg is like him... or was... too bad he died

[paulisapler]

Oh, I think the kitten's trying to kill me,

I better kill him first.

Good thing mommy's sleeping,

Where are the big scissors?

Here kitty, here kitty, here kitty,

We're gonna play a different, funny kind of game.

Nothing's ever going to be the same.

[l7lll]

I want that on my Ipod.

[mackdee111]

love the cesarean joke!!!

[alexkx3]

"Half twin"!! Whenever people ask me if my and my bro a twins, i'm sooo using that!

[Jackcouldcanyou]

i thought he died

[joeloud1]

You might be thinking of Mitch Hedberg, who passed away in 2005. He was influenced by Wright and they have similar senses of humor.

[MrFBGuru]

Hedberg was more opposed to the lethargic, going along with a laid back attitude. Smiled a lot too.

[TrimTOODLE]

he was VERY shy onstage too

[mynameisinept]

I would say style of humor rather than sense. Even then I don't think they're anything alike. I think there's certain similarities which make it more likely for a person who likes Mitch Hedberg or Demitri Martin or Zach Galifianakis to also like Steven Wright. After watching documentaries on all these guys, I don't think you would probably catch them hanging out a whole lot. All very different people.

[AsuiandFelicity]

i spilt spot remover on my dog and now hes gone.

[n00bcatcher]

did you make that up?

[AsuiandFelicity]

no he says it

[youfillintheblank1]

I wanna be a bird so my shit will be white!1 LOL

[sk473p1mp]

best comedian ever!!!

[drfeelgood1992]

i spilt spot remover on my dog... now hes gone

[Nowthatsjustscary5]

He has loads of original material. I can't imagine a person any funnier. His entire comedic appeal is how unfunny he would seem if he weren't always coming up with such hilarious jokes.

[gonzomuse]

Stop fucking laughing you idiots, I can't hear him.

[NoName875]

what do you expect,its a camera vid

[lowchord08]

this is "When The Leaves Blow Away"

[planetpisshead]

this was on comedy central but its not on demand =(

[MajSmJz]

There's apparently a good joke at 5:40, but he's talking so hard I can't understand it.

[MichaelLevine]

he hemmed the coat sleeves 2 inches

[MajSmJz]

LoL!

[hommie286]

he rocks

[statikeffeck]

hey I think this very same performance is available to watch intstantly on Netflix or rent by DVD.

[scrubadub1032]

ouiji board of directors lolol

[ThePersonofComents]

Deadpan>most other kinds of comedy.

Steven Wright is only Equal to Mitch Hedberg in mah annoying oppinion.

[Joey0Ze0Spaniard]

I love it how he always opens all his acts with a sincere, "...thanks..."

[TyeDyeGuyRy]

Deadpan is not a style for everyone.

I love the stuff. He's the best deadpan i've seen.

[m00fa]

not everyone gets him, i personaly love him....

[enoezark]

Been a favorite of mine since I was in 4th grade!!!

[RussX5Z]

I don't get it. Not funny.

[Rightcheous]

aquired taste ^^

[rafalweb]

One of the funniest commedians around, and a style all his own. Compare him to Dane Cook who sucks.

[oKingSpadeo]

Word!

[artistsandbox]

Ya! You should look up Zach Galifianakis, a great new comedian with a similar style who also hates Dane Cook.

[Nuther10cents]

not new

[yahozay]

why do so many comedians hate dane cook

[djburtis]

because he is not funny...

[Gamersruletheworld]

most of his jokes are stolen from prior comedians, he has very little original material

[artistella]

because he steals material from other comedians

[looneyfarm]

no, just because he is just lame

[looneyfarm]

dane cook that is... 'reply' button didn't work it seems... fucking thing SUCKS

[captainwinters456]

everything they said. steals material, doesn't ever tell actual jokes, and he just makes people laugh based on the assumption that using "big humor" is hilarious--the kind of humor all the attention-needy kids in your high school classes used to use.

hedberg and wright forever.

[jeremyfoley12]

Hedberg and Wright! They're the best!

[fumunshu]

Same reason why people hate mcdonalds.

[dealerovski82]

They voted him most unfunny couse their jellous, right ? He makes half the effort but gets as much laughs any other comedian..

[joshthemyth83]

i dunno i think this guy is a genius and his humor is sooooo funny and comedy is ment to make ppl laugh and 4 me this guy does an amazing job

[Ick200]

dane cook and carlos mencia both suck

[logician360]

Pah!

In a 2005 poll to find The Comedian's Comedian, Steven Wright was voted amongst the top 50 comedy acts ever by fellow comedians and comedy insiders.

Dane Cook and Carlos Mencia are too boring and unoriginal for the two to be compared without the reviewer killing themselves.

[sleeeeep]

it dawned on me that this is "the guy" who slept on the couch from the movie half baked

[flip9]

unquote

[eternal22x]

"I brought myself just one walkie talkie....cause I didnt want anybody to hear what I was saying"

"I tried to make flight reservation and they asked me how many will be traveling, and I said I dont know its your plane"

[1keryl]

the guy is a comic genius!

[Disprofuse]

That last sketch made me laugh so hard it hurt. Oh god, that was funny. In 2007! I can't believe he's still going and still really really funny.

[dunk2802]

top class

[JackBauer2442]

due u talk too much

[tomasmck07]

quote

[TrigunGoodness]

unquote

[TSM8088]

I always liked his joke: "I was driving my car one night and I thought, "If I was travelling at the speed of light would the headlights still work?""

[bigpyoopypants]

That is a good one. Although they would still work.

[iRecruiter]

You could only tell if they worked if you were, as you are driving, behind them. People in front of you wouldn't see the lights. Very dangerous if you're on the Dark Side of the Moon!

[bigpyoopypants]

True, but It's not really any more dangerous. You see, if you were traveling at the speed of light, they wouldn't even see you comming, let alone have time to move out of the way. Having headlights or not at that speed is a moot point. ;) lol, they're still not gonna see you, and chances are, you're not gonna see them either. 7 times around the earth in one second and reaction time becomes laughable.

I took it way to seriously. ;)

[iRecruiter]

No, you see, if you're traveling at the speed of light, you first turn on your headlights then go to that speed. That way, your headlights extending out an infinite distance ahead of you and you never catch up to the end because you're traveling at the same speed. Now, assuming that with the science to have that speed we'd also have advanced sensors and optics (by that time) to avoid unwanted collisions. So, you see, totally plausible. LOL

[bigpyoopypants]

I understand basic physics, but haveing headlights at that speed is still moot, and totally useless. If you had advanced sensors, then why do you need the headlights?

And why am I arguing about this? lol

[iRecruiter]

Because you've run into another nut at the speed of the internet. I think we got tangled up for a moment. Yea, what was I thinking? The 5 senses are so basic. WE would advance our senses too, wouldn't we?

[Panushkin]

turning on the headlights first would wer if you was going streigt?

[eouellette12]

einstein's theory of special relativity actually shows that the headlights would still project a beam forward at the speed of light, so people in front of the car (which never could move at the speed of light because it has mass) would actually see the light.

[doc98archer]

byt all actions have consequnces so if one person drove around 7 times around the earth at the speed of light with headlights, would it affect them later? LOL

[mcarterphoto]

Steven Wright could talk about this video... "I just bought a camera.. it has auto out of focus..."

[subjekt]

haha, thats actually pretty funny.

[scubatanque]

good one!

[x0googoodolls42]

wow this had a lot better quality than i thought it would..

wow this guy is hilarious.. hes like so random but his jokes are so funny

[royhyena]

lol He's deadpan and has dark humor. Best combination. This clip didn't have it, but he did the joke: "It was my first time in love and I learned a lot. Before that, I never thought about killing myself."

Dark, but amusing. He's one of my favorites.

[subjekt]

Another really funny part is when he was saying, "She wrote me a beautiful letter, i crossed her name out and wrote mine underneath it and sent it back to her. I neer heard from her again. Apparently she didn't like what she wrote." LOL, i love it...especially the way he sounds.

[tambomb1]

thanks!

[narftall]

snakes have no arms !!

so very cool thanks for posting

[Avestriel]

Damn it I couldn't hear the last two jokes

[ragdemus]

I was cesarian born you can't really tell although whenever I leave the house I go out through the window! Ha Ha Ha! Genius!

[ragdemus]

I was cesarian born you could never tell

[kryss119]

I've seen a few people say George Carlin is one of the best comedians. I really don't understand that at all.. I find him actually very boring, he talks about facts and politicians... it's not funny, most of his stand-up is him in explanation of his beliefs. Mitch Hedberg and Steven Wright atleast make you forget the world and make you laugh and think about silly stuff! That's comedy!

[evansglory]

it's all comedy. just in different forms. level of humor is dependent among the viewer.

[katadantesux]

people that don't find this guy funny just don't have the benefit of visualization.. lol..

[theLikesofme3]

oh i just Love clever comedians. lol~

[booman606]

one of the greats

[klaatuuns]

The two kittens joke just before 7 mins is my favorite bit here.

[christymoellering]

Thanks for the vid because I wanted to see what his more recent stuff is like since he's here in Michigan later this week and I'm trying to talk my husband into going...I've loved him for years too.

[bennyslash]

I'm going to that tonight...it should be fun.

[christymoellering]

We went last night too! I thought he was really good. I laughed really hard at the guitar comments about the reflection on the wall. I also loved seeing him with the big cheesy smile.

[bennyslash]

I never thought that I would ever be able to see him. I couldn't believe it. I loved the song about killing the kitten!

[governorgilf]

This guy's my all-time favorite.  First saw him on SNL when I was 15 back in 1985, and have been a fan ever since. Still funny as ever.

[gunnerfield]

He's my favorite comedian, i live close to concord but won't go be seeing him, i would if i known he was coming to nh, maybe some other time.

[xxtthompsxx]

just bought tickets for my fathers birthday to go to this show tomorrow night in nh also

[blitzkreig25]

mwahaha this guys amazing. have fun

[xrockon2271]

this is a shitty vid. hilarious tho

[CubedCircle]

So My Shit Could Be White!! LOL!

[kryss119]

[Whispering] Snakes have no arms that's why they don't wear vests.... Goodnight

LMAO

[ridinginmyboat]

Saw Steven Wright back in 2006, it was excellent. Thanks for bringing back some good memories.