Just read Anna Minard's awesome article article about John and Nerdfighteria and I instantly teared up at the mention of Esther, even after all this time. Rest in awesome, Esther.
@Skyway2000Vlogs He notes later on that knowing Esther influenced him hugely in writing TFiOS, and he dedicated it to her, but he wanted to stress clearly that Hazel is not Esther.
As I watched this all I was able to do was take off my TSWGO bracelet, look at it and cry. Esther, though I've never met you I feel like I've known you my entire life. Rest In Awesome.
@taggrey I think a death is definitely sad, don't get me wrong, but this is not purely a sad situation. Esther has reminded me something I lost a long time ago: the power of being positive and of making the most of life. Even if she was sad under the surface as you are suggesting - and I can recognise from personal experience that people often hide their true emotions - I don't think that undermines the way she has affected nerdfighters based on the vision of Esther she has painted for us.
I may have not been able to know of Esther as I started watched Vlogbrothers less than a month later, but two years on, she still continues to be awesome. RIA Esther.
Wow, I never knew about this. But, damn. I'm so sorry. She seems great. I looked on her Youtube channel. No one should die that young, it's so unfair. Only nature can be so cruel. I haven't read TFIOS yet to my deep shame, since I'm waiting for it to be translated in Dutch, which will make the reading experience that much more for me. But reading all those comments about how touched everyone is by it, is making me really impatient! I didn't know Esther, but I hope she rests in awesome, too.
Wow. When I first watched this video, I was sad. It's impossible not to be. Now, I feel something more. We all know that Esther is not Hazel and Hazel is not Esther, but having read The Fault in Our Stars, this video has changed for me. John ended the video by saying this: Esther, my friend, Godspeed. That is what Isaac said to Augustus. My eyes were tearing up, and I have that feeling in my heart that makes me feel like the world is broken and can't be put back together.
@taggrey But it's not broken. And I think that's the post that Esther's life, Esther's memory has made for me - that everything is fine. You can still enjoy everything dispite it all, just like Esther did. Esther just really enjoyed life, truly. It's an important lesson for us. And her life isn't over. Everything isn't done, and it's not left broken; she has left so much more good in the world. Esther has inspired thousands of people and she lives in all of us.
@Atuchy That's just it, the world ISN'T broken, and it won't be unless we let it. Also, it was the way that John put it that made me feel how I did. The fact of the matter, though, is that it IS a sad ending. Every death is a sad ending because that is how we all work. I recently watched Esther's videos for the first time. I wasn't expecting it, but Esther was a funny kid. But we have to understand that no matter how well they seem to deal with things, kids often hide their true feelings.
I've watched through Esther's videos (procrastination, but no regrets because she is amazing) and even though I'm a new nerdfighter, I cannot help but feel somewhat close to her in some way. It sounds kind of weird, I guess, but oh well. Then I watched this, and I used up a quarter of a box of tissues.
Rest in Awesome, Esther. You, our beloved star, won't go out.
One day, children will be taught in schools of how there was this horrible thing called death, how people simply stopped existing and people just accepted such things as normal, and the children will weep, for they cannot understand how people would just say goodbye forever. Nothing deserves to be forever except love... but perhaps, when a memory is as loved as the person, she will fight on alongside us, Our Lady of A Small Flat In Boston. Forever mine. Forever yours. Forever us.
i've known who esther was for maybe five minutes but i started crying watching this video. thank you, esther, for these last five minutes that have brought me back down to earth again. rest in awesome.
we should not fear death because he is needed but hate him to a degree but we should also keep in the back of our mind that life is beautiful and it's strong and it goes on but young life should never be cut short before it has a real chance to blossom and grow towards the heavens
Going back and watching these videos now, I can't seem to seperate Hazel Grace from Esther because they are so similar. I won't go on about how Awesome she is, because I never knew her, so I have no right to talk about her, but I loved her videos, and knowing she's gone breaks my heart.
I don't think I need to sai R.I.A, she seems to be doing a good job of that on her own.
I'd like to point out that Issac, during the prefuneral, Issac in his valediction ends his eulogy for Augustus the same way John ends the video, which is "_____, my friend, Godspeed." (at this point I bawled) Something to think about.
Anyway, I finished reading TFiOS today. Cried rivers. Great book.
In my speech class we had to do a "Charity Speech" and I did it on this charity. I had to persuade them to take an action and I told them to order the bracelets and donate. This was me in front of a class of thirty. Many of which I hoped took the initiative to get the bracelets. I have ordered mine very recently and am anxiously awaiting its arrival.
When this video was put up, I was relatively new to Nerdfighteria. I thought I understood what it meant to lose Esther. Since then, I've watched all of her videos, and Vlogbrother videos she was in, and read TFiOS. Watching it this time, I realized that I had no idea what it meant to lose her last time I saw this, and the immense feeling that not only Nerdfighteria, but the world had lost someone truly made of awesome moved me to tears.
Until today, I'd always thought about Esther as a person whom John knew and never as somebody I knew or could know. And then I went to her page and watched all of her videos. Now I feel like I've gained a friend and lost a friend in one day. And I know that Esther is looking down on every nerdfighter in the world and she's smiling and giggling as we open our Tfios to see her name. She's welcoming newbies and rolling her eyes at trolls. Esther, RIA, RIP.
I read TFIOS, then researched about esther and found out about how amazing and beautiful she was and how she was exactly one day younger than me... and then I reread TFIOS and it meant so much more. RIP Esther Earl.
I just finished John's newest novel, The Fault in Our Stars. John has stated that without you The Fault in Our Stars wouldn't exist. So I thank you on behalf of not just of Nerdfighteria, but on behalf of the whole world for this story that is brilliant and beautiful and wonderful. Rest in awesome, Esther. Godspeed.
Though I didn't know of Esther until recently, I have recently come to terms with the fact that she is the biggest inspiration in my life. I am a changed person from the one I woke up as this morning. Thank-you, dear Esther, and of course, RIA. You have a legacy like non-other.
I am a new nerdfighter going through old vlogbrothers vidoes and usually I just quickly watch a video and skip to the next one, but this one I had to stop and think about it for awhile; just how much Esther means to the nerdfighter community and always will.
I never knew Esther or knew of her; I only started watching vlogbrothers about half a year ago. But now, when The Fault in Our Stars is coming out, I find myself watching this video and bawling like a baby. All the support from Esther, even from people like me who never knew her, makes me so incredibly proud to be a nerdfighter. Rest in awesome, Esther.
@itsraininglool obviously, All of Nerdfightaria does. Don't say things like that.
Esther was a gift from God to all of us. It's our responsibility to respect that gift, even though it's physically left us. Respect her memory. She was a wonderful person who led a wonderful life.
I've always loved being a nerd. I've always thought it was more important to wield intellect over brawn. For the last 5 months or so I have come to realise why it is that I have loved it... and it is because nerds are fun, nerds are caring and they are sensitive and thoughtful. I have laughed hard at nearly all of Hank and Johns videos, it feels, as I'm sure most of you all experience, as if I know you two. And it is so touching to see this, to see the side of the nerd I love the most...
Science tells us, that when a star goes out, it takes hundreds or even thousands of years before we stop seeing its light, That works well as a metaphor for Esther.
@yourworstnightmar231 'Science tells us, that when a star goes out, it takes hundreds or even thousands of years before we stop seeing its light, That works well as a metaphor for Esther.'
@yourworstnightmar231 Let me add to that that the elements formed in those stars help to create other stars and even planets and asteroids, and maybe life. I think this also adds to the metaphor.
To all the people morning Esther, don't. Instead celebrate her. Everyone who knows anything about Esther would know that she is amazing and always makes others smile not cry. So just keep your head up and celebrate this truly amazing girl.
P.S. Everyone knows that a nerdfighter never dies they just become one with awesome
the look on johns face at the end of this video breaks my heart. i never knew of Ester until this summer at Leakycon, but she was an amazing human being, and watching this has brought me to tears, and reminds me why i wear my TSWGO bracelet every day. RIA Ester <3
I saw my video for Rest In Awesome today from last year... and then I came and watched this.. and watched one of her vlogs and teared up a little bit and then smiled. What you said about just standing still and being sad for a moment.. I think that's what I was doing in my video last year.. I think it's good to take just that moment and be still in that moment. She was such a sweet girl with an amazing heart.
My friend gave me an Esther bracelet for my birthday, after I'd said that I'd been meaning to get one but hadn't had time etc, and I'm so glad the money went to the charity- I mean, money sent in my place or whatever. I wear the bracelet to school, and every time I look at it I remember the girl I never knew and want to do what I can to make the world better, the way she would have wanted.
Dont cry for Esther. She was one of the most kind hearted and one of the bravest people i have ever heard of. She wouldn't want to make the world a sadder place, she wanted to spread joy, not tears. She was like Dumbledore, ready for death, and not afraid. She came like the third brother, and embraced death that was inevitable. She and death then went on as friends in to the next life.
I wasn't a nerdfighter when Esther died, but after hearing so much about her, I feel like a dear friend of mine died. Rest In Awesome, Esther. Thank you for everything you've brought to this world.
This is too sad. Rest In Awesome Esther Earl. Your life is worth just standing there for. You're a better person than any and all of us. I have to stop here before I start crying. TSWGO
Today was my 16th birthday. I received more gifts from my family than I deserve, but there was one that brought me to tears. I had only just talked about Esther in school today as an example of an experience that changed me forever. This evening out of the first gift I opened something fell. A little green band with white lettering fell to the floor, and I immediately recognized it. I hugged both of my parents tight. In memory of a dear friend that I never got to make, Rest in Awesome Esther. <3
Looked at my TSWGO braclet, watched some of Esther's videos, ended up here, going to stop before I make myself upset; especially given how much her videos made me smile just now.
You're still making this world more awesome everyday Esther, I just wish you could be here to see it. Maybe you can. I hope you can. Rest in awesome =)
I've only recently found Hank and John, and I've thoroughly enjoyed watching their videos because they've always made me smile. Today, however, something deeper than enjoyment was forged: I found respect.
I'd never heard of Esther before watching this video, and yet I teared up over it anyway. I know I'm not the only one in this position, and I'd like to sincerely thank these two men for being such inspirations to all of Nerdfighteria.
your kindness and attitude to Esther's life has always inspired me to cope with my own personal loss. "This star won't go out" has been a motto I've kept in my heart. Not only are you a brilliant writer John, but you help those living their everyday lives come together, and become one strong unit. To increase awesome, in every amazing aspect of the word. dftba. rest in awesome Esther
I'm turning 16 in a little less than a month.... In art class I made a little banner saying "This star won't go out." and it's hanging on the wall in my room, to remind me of the amazing person I never got to know, and of how precious life is. I wish I had known Ether when I had the chance. RIA Esther, you are missed by many. :'(
i dont like this video, i think its beautifull and sad and inspirational... but i dont like it in the way that it made me laugh or anything... would deff give it 5 stars if i still could..
Ok, the 165 people that disliked this video? WHAT THE HELL?! Esther was an amazing person and continues to live on in our hearts, even those who never had the pleasure of meeting her. Keep shining Esther, your forever with us!
@awm21295 and @redvinenerd thanks..i guess id never heard it before so i didnt recognize it. i googled it, though, and then i read paper towns, in which the phrase was used multiple times. isnt it funny how a word (or phrase) you just learned begins to keep coming up like everywhere! *sorry this is not meant to start a comment thread about something completely off topic.sorry*
John looks and sounds as if he's been crying. I would have cried too, if i were a cryer...im crying on the inside though, and i feel all your pain even though i didnt know about esther at all untill recently. I will go watch her vlogs though, so i can feel more.
@Palatard Of course people die every day, but that doesn't make death any less tragic. We might not have known Esther personally but we can see everything that she's done and the lasting impact that she's had on this community. You don't have to know someone to know their importance and to feel some kind of connection with them. I cry every time I watch this video because if Esther were alive today, she would be my age and though I didn't know her, I wish I did.
@Palatard I am oversensitive! And gladly so! (and sadly so, and angrily so, and over-emotionally so). Emotions aren't something to be ashamed of. I didn't know she had existed until the day this video originally posted. I didn't cry during the video, but after, I read her twitter and I watched her videos and I saw a young woman handle a disease with some humour, humility and raw humanity that is not rare in existence, but at least rarely seen. That's bound to evoke some emotion! Best wishes.
@Palatard She was only 16 freaking years old. She had her whole life to live. We cry because we lost our bestfriend a year ago. Im sorry, but if you had lost someone who meant an incredible amount to you, I would hope you would be upset and cry. Or am I being 'over-sensitive'??
what did he say at the end? i think i missed it..it was like, esther, my friend, god speed? something like that..anyone who caught it, please tell! im dying to know:) RIA esther, by the way
I noticed something today. Esther was born the day after I was. And she died the day after John's birthday. It was a coincidence, but an interesting one.
I'm sure you've heard this many times before but, 165 truly have no heart. I can't even begin to understand why someone would dislike this.
I'm just going to asume that their hand sliped and that they hit the wrong button. Because, I can't imagine that anyone would knowingly dislike this video. It's sadening. Esther, I never knew you. But, I do know how completely amazing you were. Thank you for everything you've tought me. RIA <3
wow this is just so sad, I only found out about Esther today, and have watched her videos and she was just so awesome! R.I.A Esther, and I just can't get over how sad this is, really. The end where John is just genuinely emotional just makes me well up every time. It's people like this who should get the views.
I didn't even know Esther existed when she was still alive. Yet I cried so much watching this video. R.I.A. Esther - a very real person I wish I had known about earlier.
@pixelsofrelativity same, i read through the blogs from the beginning, the ups and downs, and by the end i was in tears because i knew when it was going to end.
Esther, I haven't been a Nerdfighter for very long, and the first time I was introduced to you was when you had already passed away and John was reminding me to buy my bracelet down in the doobly doo. But now I see just what you meant to all of Nerdfighteria, and also to me. Otherwise I wouldn't be crying right now. DFTBA.
rest in peace esther. although i do not personally know you, i find myself sitting here, one year after your passing, shedding tears for this great loss of an awesome member of the nerdfighter community and an important part to this world. xx
Don't fret for Esther it is a tragedy and a shame that she is gone from our world but one will never die if one is remembered and Esther day has ensured this.
I have to say, Ester was (and remains in video form) an amazingly pretty (beautiful?) girl x
SormaNo4 12 hours ago
Just read Anna Minard's awesome article article about John and Nerdfighteria and I instantly teared up at the mention of Esther, even after all this time. Rest in awesome, Esther.
tinyhermione 1 day ago
Sometimes I write in Esther's ask box on tumblr because I know that when everyone else won't listen to me, she will. RIA, Esther.
ScaraFiggy 4 days ago
Didn't even know Esther existed until about a week ago...and now I'm crying watching this :')
WeeTubaGirl 4 days ago 3
You Awesome is an Awesome Awesome.
dlbattle100 5 days ago
16 year old with cancer. TFiOS?
Skyway2000Vlogs 6 days ago
@Skyway2000Vlogs He dedicated TFiOS to her
awesomeDJisme 3 days ago in playlist Uploaded videos
@Skyway2000Vlogs He notes later on that knowing Esther influenced him hugely in writing TFiOS, and he dedicated it to her, but he wanted to stress clearly that Hazel is not Esther.
PatrickAureus 2 days ago
Rest in awesome, Esther.
AwesomeFawkes 1 week ago
This was the day before my brother died:(
lafona29 1 week ago
"Don't just do something. Stand there." Well said.
Socratena 1 week ago 8
As I watched this all I was able to do was take off my TSWGO bracelet, look at it and cry. Esther, though I've never met you I feel like I've known you my entire life. Rest In Awesome.
JinxDagger 1 week ago 5
"Esther, my friend, godspeed." That kills me every time.
doleightful 1 week ago 10
I want to write a big paragraph about how Esther is an inspiration to us all, but I don't know what to say.
Esther, rest in awesome.
I'm proud to be a Nerdfighter knowing she was one of us.
PollyBreedDumb 1 week ago 5
I was watching this without my headphones in, and then my sister comes in and said, "I don't even know her and I'm crying."
That was the day that my sister became a nerdfighter.
zuzupetals3 1 week ago 6
@taggrey I think a death is definitely sad, don't get me wrong, but this is not purely a sad situation. Esther has reminded me something I lost a long time ago: the power of being positive and of making the most of life. Even if she was sad under the surface as you are suggesting - and I can recognise from personal experience that people often hide their true emotions - I don't think that undermines the way she has affected nerdfighters based on the vision of Esther she has painted for us.
Atuchy 1 week ago
Oh my god, the crying.
Atuchy 1 week ago
I may have not been able to know of Esther as I started watched Vlogbrothers less than a month later, but two years on, she still continues to be awesome. RIA Esther.
dc8r17 1 week ago 4
Wow, I never knew about this. But, damn. I'm so sorry. She seems great. I looked on her Youtube channel. No one should die that young, it's so unfair. Only nature can be so cruel. I haven't read TFIOS yet to my deep shame, since I'm waiting for it to be translated in Dutch, which will make the reading experience that much more for me. But reading all those comments about how touched everyone is by it, is making me really impatient! I didn't know Esther, but I hope she rests in awesome, too.
Daphuhnuh 2 weeks ago 3
RIA, Esther. <3
mthsbandrocks 2 weeks ago in playlist More videos from vlogbrothers
Wow. When I first watched this video, I was sad. It's impossible not to be. Now, I feel something more. We all know that Esther is not Hazel and Hazel is not Esther, but having read The Fault in Our Stars, this video has changed for me. John ended the video by saying this: Esther, my friend, Godspeed. That is what Isaac said to Augustus. My eyes were tearing up, and I have that feeling in my heart that makes me feel like the world is broken and can't be put back together.
RIA, Esther.
taggrey 2 weeks ago 3
@taggrey But it's not broken. And I think that's the post that Esther's life, Esther's memory has made for me - that everything is fine. You can still enjoy everything dispite it all, just like Esther did. Esther just really enjoyed life, truly. It's an important lesson for us. And her life isn't over. Everything isn't done, and it's not left broken; she has left so much more good in the world. Esther has inspired thousands of people and she lives in all of us.
I don't think it's a sad ending.
Atuchy 1 week ago
@Atuchy That's just it, the world ISN'T broken, and it won't be unless we let it. Also, it was the way that John put it that made me feel how I did. The fact of the matter, though, is that it IS a sad ending. Every death is a sad ending because that is how we all work. I recently watched Esther's videos for the first time. I wasn't expecting it, but Esther was a funny kid. But we have to understand that no matter how well they seem to deal with things, kids often hide their true feelings.
taggrey 1 week ago
I've watched through Esther's videos (procrastination, but no regrets because she is amazing) and even though I'm a new nerdfighter, I cannot help but feel somewhat close to her in some way. It sounds kind of weird, I guess, but oh well. Then I watched this, and I used up a quarter of a box of tissues.
Rest in Awesome, Esther. You, our beloved star, won't go out.
Piiiglett 2 weeks ago 4
Esther had the same middle name as one of my friends who just died of cancer, Grace. and I think it explains both of them quite well
gretahoo 3 weeks ago
I got so choked up when John said, 'this star won't go out, and it won't, we won't let it'
Rest in Awesome, Esther.
Julessftl 3 weeks ago in playlist More videos from vlogbrothers 8
Esther's memory will live on forever through the book, but I still want to plant trees for her.
lilypad145 3 weeks ago in playlist Uploaded videos
Is anyone else kinda teary eye'd? or,crying..?
MM67productions 3 weeks ago 130
One day, children will be taught in schools of how there was this horrible thing called death, how people simply stopped existing and people just accepted such things as normal, and the children will weep, for they cannot understand how people would just say goodbye forever. Nothing deserves to be forever except love... but perhaps, when a memory is as loved as the person, she will fight on alongside us, Our Lady of A Small Flat In Boston. Forever mine. Forever yours. Forever us.
leaguesmanoframsgate 4 weeks ago 7
i've known who esther was for maybe five minutes but i started crying watching this video. thank you, esther, for these last five minutes that have brought me back down to earth again. rest in awesome.
caty241830 4 weeks ago 7
i like the way before she talks about the importance of her family she first helps a member of her family-i think that says a lot about her
Rest In Awesome Eshter x
imrorykelly 1 month ago
we should not fear death because he is needed but hate him to a degree but we should also keep in the back of our mind that life is beautiful and it's strong and it goes on but young life should never be cut short before it has a real chance to blossom and grow towards the heavens
thewolffromhell66666 1 month ago 3
Going back and watching these videos now, I can't seem to seperate Hazel Grace from Esther because they are so similar. I won't go on about how Awesome she is, because I never knew her, so I have no right to talk about her, but I loved her videos, and knowing she's gone breaks my heart.
I don't think I need to sai R.I.A, she seems to be doing a good job of that on her own.
TactownGirl 1 month ago 45
This has been flagged as spam show
Spoiler below:
I'd like to point out that Issac, during the prefuneral, Issac in his valediction ends his eulogy for Augustus the same way John ends the video, which is "_____, my friend, Godspeed." (at this point I bawled) Something to think about.
Anyway, I finished reading TFiOS today. Cried rivers. Great book.
RIA, Esther.
mudki3p 1 month ago 7
Why are there so many dislikes on this video? D:
mthsbandrocks 1 month ago 4
This has been flagged as spam show
@mthsbandrocks "Why are there so many dislikes on this video? D:"
Maybe people were dislikeing Esthers death, not so much the video.
TactownGirl 1 month ago
@mthsbandrocks i would dislike this video. i dislike that esther died :(
YouGoOutBruiseYellow 1 month ago
Comment removed
krose9393 1 month ago
I live my life for the one she didn't have.
EarthLaughsAtYou 1 month ago 10
In my speech class we had to do a "Charity Speech" and I did it on this charity. I had to persuade them to take an action and I told them to order the bracelets and donate. This was me in front of a class of thirty. Many of which I hoped took the initiative to get the bracelets. I have ordered mine very recently and am anxiously awaiting its arrival.
4LiveLifeWithLove4 1 month ago
John's post crying voice always makes me a little sad :(
ravencarslyle 1 month ago in playlist Uploaded videos 6
@ravencarslyle ohhh....I also didn't know that she passed away the day after his birthday...that had to be hard :(
ravencarslyle 1 month ago in playlist Uploaded videos
"He said his greatest contribution is the ones you leave behind"
-Alan Jackson's song "Small Town Southern Man"
jacobwaffles 1 month ago
This has been flagged as spam show
When this video was put up, I was relatively new to Nerdfighteria. I thought I understood what it meant to lose Esther. Since then, I've watched all of her videos, and Vlogbrother videos she was in, and read TFiOS. Watching it this time, I realized that I had no idea what it meant to lose her last time I saw this, and the immense feeling that not only Nerdfighteria, but the world had lost someone truly made of awesome moved me to tears.
RIA, Esther.
saltymessage 1 month ago 2
Comment removed
saltymessage 1 month ago
how can u dislike this thats kinda evil
omgbenwooo 1 month ago in playlist More videos from vlogbrothers 4
Until today, I'd always thought about Esther as a person whom John knew and never as somebody I knew or could know. And then I went to her page and watched all of her videos. Now I feel like I've gained a friend and lost a friend in one day. And I know that Esther is looking down on every nerdfighter in the world and she's smiling and giggling as we open our Tfios to see her name. She's welcoming newbies and rolling her eyes at trolls. Esther, RIA, RIP.
xPrincessKx 1 month ago 4
I think John was about to cry a little at the end of the video. I did.
lollylandman 1 month ago 3
Esther is just one of the many people and things that makes me wish I'd become a nerdfighter/ discovered nerdfighteria much, much sooner :(
R.I.A Esther
asdfqwerzxcv6 1 month ago
It kills me when he says "Esther, my friend." Just kills me. <3
ANTHONYRAPPISAGOD 1 month ago 6
I read TFIOS, then researched about esther and found out about how amazing and beautiful she was and how she was exactly one day younger than me... and then I reread TFIOS and it meant so much more. RIP Esther Earl.
LolOfMyLife001 1 month ago
I just watched this now. And burst into tears.
tabbylucys 1 month ago
@tabbylucys Me too, within the first few seconds
fantasyfanatic777 1 month ago
Like everyone else in the comments, i just read TFiOS, and before the book even began, I got choked up. "To Esther Earl" is all it took. RIA, Esther!
EveryDayIWake 1 month ago 10
Dear Esther,
I just finished John's newest novel, The Fault in Our Stars. John has stated that without you The Fault in Our Stars wouldn't exist. So I thank you on behalf of not just of Nerdfighteria, but on behalf of the whole world for this story that is brilliant and beautiful and wonderful. Rest in awesome, Esther. Godspeed.
- Becca L.
HiBeccaBye 1 month ago 5
Though I didn't know of Esther until recently, I have recently come to terms with the fact that she is the biggest inspiration in my life. I am a changed person from the one I woke up as this morning. Thank-you, dear Esther, and of course, RIA. You have a legacy like non-other.
ParachuteVine 1 month ago
I am a new nerdfighter going through old vlogbrothers vidoes and usually I just quickly watch a video and skip to the next one, but this one I had to stop and think about it for awhile; just how much Esther means to the nerdfighter community and always will.
Rest In Awesome, Esther
melissa9315 1 month ago
We come back to this video the day after TFIOS was released. :')
dannerzme 1 month ago 7
This video still makes me cry.
Miranzira 1 month ago 5
When you were born, you cried and the world rejoiced.
Live your life so that when you die,
the world cries and you rejoice.
-Cherokee Expression
xxxHeyZeusxxx 1 month ago 12
@xxxHeyZeusxxx So beautiful. Thank you for sharing this.
dannerzme 1 month ago
This video always makes me feel really sad because John sounds like he's on the verge of tears. :(
PingyRules55555 1 month ago 4
I never knew Esther or knew of her; I only started watching vlogbrothers about half a year ago. But now, when The Fault in Our Stars is coming out, I find myself watching this video and bawling like a baby. All the support from Esther, even from people like me who never knew her, makes me so incredibly proud to be a nerdfighter. Rest in awesome, Esther.
reallycharmify 1 month ago 2
@itsraininglool obviously, All of Nerdfightaria does. Don't say things like that.
Esther was a gift from God to all of us. It's our responsibility to respect that gift, even though it's physically left us. Respect her memory. She was a wonderful person who led a wonderful life.
maxsgirl13 1 month ago
I really should stop watching it because I cry every time :'(
NightmareRelived 1 month ago
due to esther I also call my oxigen-tank denmark;)
RIA, your star will never go out
PetitCarmen 1 month ago
I have yet to watch this video without crying when he says " This star wont go out, we wont let it." R.I.A. Esther
MusicChic357 1 month ago in playlist More videos from vlogbrothers
I've never heard John like this. It's just... wow.
Silverballoons 2 months ago 3
@yourworstightmar231 wow, thats really beautiful.
plushalligator 2 months ago
I've always loved being a nerd. I've always thought it was more important to wield intellect over brawn. For the last 5 months or so I have come to realise why it is that I have loved it... and it is because nerds are fun, nerds are caring and they are sensitive and thoughtful. I have laughed hard at nearly all of Hank and Johns videos, it feels, as I'm sure most of you all experience, as if I know you two. And it is so touching to see this, to see the side of the nerd I love the most...
R.I.A.
tristaNINchains 2 months ago 9
Science tells us, that when a star goes out, it takes hundreds or even thousands of years before we stop seeing its light, That works well as a metaphor for Esther.
yourworstnightmar231 2 months ago 334
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@yourworstnightmar231 'Science tells us, that when a star goes out, it takes hundreds or even thousands of years before we stop seeing its light, That works well as a metaphor for Esther.'
- That is a beautiful beautiful statement.
HoliHallow 2 months ago
@yourworstnightmar231 Let me add to that that the elements formed in those stars help to create other stars and even planets and asteroids, and maybe life. I think this also adds to the metaphor.
DracoMhuuh 2 months ago 2
@DracoMhuuh Yes it does! thanks
yourworstnightmar231 2 months ago
Esther doesnt need to RIA. She is awesome, so she just continues to b e awesome.
redbarron718 2 months ago 4
... I just cried. :'c
allthebrokenstrings 2 months ago in playlist More videos from vlogbrothers 7
The last few days the weather has been extremely cloudy and while I was watching this video the sun came out. It's quite beautiful.
Annika163 2 months ago 5
To all the people morning Esther, don't. Instead celebrate her. Everyone who knows anything about Esther would know that she is amazing and always makes others smile not cry. So just keep your head up and celebrate this truly amazing girl.
P.S. Everyone knows that a nerdfighter never dies they just become one with awesome
ClaireLaBear11 2 months ago 7
the look on johns face at the end of this video breaks my heart. i never knew of Ester until this summer at Leakycon, but she was an amazing human being, and watching this has brought me to tears, and reminds me why i wear my TSWGO bracelet every day. RIA Ester <3
xemmiexbearx 2 months ago in playlist More videos from vlogbrothers
I don't cry often, but right now, I am. Esther was a gorgeous gorgeous girl and she will live on
theanachronismkid 3 months ago
Actually Esther is named after Ishtar, the Assyrian and Babylonian goddess of fertility, love, war, and sex. But it sounds like star.
BetzalelGanot 3 months ago
I saw my video for Rest In Awesome today from last year... and then I came and watched this.. and watched one of her vlogs and teared up a little bit and then smiled. What you said about just standing still and being sad for a moment.. I think that's what I was doing in my video last year.. I think it's good to take just that moment and be still in that moment. She was such a sweet girl with an amazing heart.
kitten90 3 months ago
My friend gave me an Esther bracelet for my birthday, after I'd said that I'd been meaning to get one but hadn't had time etc, and I'm so glad the money went to the charity- I mean, money sent in my place or whatever. I wear the bracelet to school, and every time I look at it I remember the girl I never knew and want to do what I can to make the world better, the way she would have wanted.
QueenOfTheAubergines 3 months ago
This made me cry. And now I feel horrible because I can't think of anything worthwhile to say about this amazing girl.
TheBroccoliLemon 3 months ago 2
This has been flagged as spam show
BITCH WHO GIVES A SHIT
itsraininglool 3 months ago
I was preparing myself to see him burst out in tears, just like I did. Heartbreaking. :/
TheMinibout13 3 months ago
Dont cry for Esther. She was one of the most kind hearted and one of the bravest people i have ever heard of. She wouldn't want to make the world a sadder place, she wanted to spread joy, not tears. She was like Dumbledore, ready for death, and not afraid. She came like the third brother, and embraced death that was inevitable. She and death then went on as friends in to the next life.
redbarron718 4 months ago 5
I wasn't a nerdfighter when Esther died, but after hearing so much about her, I feel like a dear friend of mine died. Rest In Awesome, Esther. Thank you for everything you've brought to this world.
wolfiegirl81 4 months ago 2
The fault on our stars is that this one went out.
thedexter102 4 months ago 658
@thedexter102 But it didn't, and won't if we don't let it.
asyouwish141 1 month ago
@thedexter102 Esthers star will never go out as long as we keep her alive.
Robynsonfire 1 month ago in playlist More videos from vlogbrothers
@thedexter102 But this star wont go out. She'll never go out. <3
violaplayerforever 1 month ago
@thedexter102 Esther's star will never go out.
rachelfrench1992 1 month ago 6
@thedexter102 But this star hasn't gone out, and won't, ever.
Poppy224 1 month ago
@thedexter102 I suck at typing.... but it's the thought that counts. I love you nerdfighters, DFTBA.
thedexter102 1 month ago
@thedexter102 No, it didn't, and no, it won't.
overratedname 1 month ago
@thedexter102
No, this star hasn't and WON'T go out.
tehMetroRanger 1 month ago 5
@thedexter102 Except this star won't go out.
uiruu 1 month ago 5
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i only ever knew of Esther after her death, but yet i'm in tears from watching this and her old video's
rest in awesome Esther ♥
kt76943 4 months ago
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kt76943 4 months ago
Always wear my bracelet even though I never knew her. R.I.A.
Carolyn124 4 months ago
This is too sad. Rest In Awesome Esther Earl. Your life is worth just standing there for. You're a better person than any and all of us. I have to stop here before I start crying. TSWGO
rikko338 4 months ago
Today was my 16th birthday. I received more gifts from my family than I deserve, but there was one that brought me to tears. I had only just talked about Esther in school today as an example of an experience that changed me forever. This evening out of the first gift I opened something fell. A little green band with white lettering fell to the floor, and I immediately recognized it. I hugged both of my parents tight. In memory of a dear friend that I never got to make, Rest in Awesome Esther. <3
Crazycat7121 4 months ago in playlist Crazycat7121's favorites 5
Esther means star. Stars are suns and suns produce sunlight, just like Esther. R. I. A.
PnFHPa7x 4 months ago
John... Thanks for making me think.
SlytherinOreo 4 months ago
Esther you were a brilliant person and I wish I could've met you
GummyBev 5 months ago
ria esther
myvampireweekday 5 months ago
Looked at my TSWGO braclet, watched some of Esther's videos, ended up here, going to stop before I make myself upset; especially given how much her videos made me smile just now.
You're still making this world more awesome everyday Esther, I just wish you could be here to see it. Maybe you can. I hope you can. Rest in awesome =)
psychopurple 5 months ago 3
I've only recently found Hank and John, and I've thoroughly enjoyed watching their videos because they've always made me smile. Today, however, something deeper than enjoyment was forged: I found respect.
I'd never heard of Esther before watching this video, and yet I teared up over it anyway. I know I'm not the only one in this position, and I'd like to sincerely thank these two men for being such inspirations to all of Nerdfighteria.
Esther, R.I.P. and R.I.A. Always.
check0boardz 5 months ago 211
And now I'm crying... :(
joshoftheforest 5 months ago
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your kindness and attitude to Esther's life has always inspired me to cope with my own personal loss. "This star won't go out" has been a motto I've kept in my heart. Not only are you a brilliant writer John, but you help those living their everyday lives come together, and become one strong unit. To increase awesome, in every amazing aspect of the word. dftba. rest in awesome Esther
ishvampire 5 months ago
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ishvampire 5 months ago
John, I propose a new second DFTBA in honour of her and others like her...
DFTBAU - Don't Forget The Best Among Us
BuildItTutorials 5 months ago 3
what day is Esther day?
RIA esther. i wish i knew about you earlier :'(
pbjellybeanful 5 months ago
Ester is my role modle.
FlyingPigscanfly711 5 months ago in playlist More videos from vlogbrothers
I'm turning 16 in a little less than a month.... In art class I made a little banner saying "This star won't go out." and it's hanging on the wall in my room, to remind me of the amazing person I never got to know, and of how precious life is. I wish I had known Ether when I had the chance. RIA Esther, you are missed by many. :'(
Crazycat7121 5 months ago
this video makes me tear up every time I watch it, even though I didn't know Esther.
QueenOfTheAubergines 5 months ago
I cried when I saw this video:(
RIA Esther
GeorgiaGrier28 5 months ago
and the sadest thing she only turned 16 2 weeks before she died
rest in awesome esther
MegaRandompeoplez 6 months ago
-3 Nerdfighteria misses you Esther, Rest in Awesome
ImogensImagination18 6 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
Your thoughts have been commodified, consolidated and repackaged.
commodifiedthoughts 6 months ago
i dont like this video, i think its beautifull and sad and inspirational... but i dont like it in the way that it made me laugh or anything... would deff give it 5 stars if i still could..
sterf666 6 months ago
Maybe the dislikes are because they thought the video was so sad.
LexiTheShortOne 6 months ago 2
Ok, the 165 people that disliked this video? WHAT THE HELL?! Esther was an amazing person and continues to live on in our hearts, even those who never had the pleasure of meeting her. Keep shining Esther, your forever with us!
glowstick145 6 months ago
@awm21295 and @redvinenerd thanks..i guess id never heard it before so i didnt recognize it. i googled it, though, and then i read paper towns, in which the phrase was used multiple times. isnt it funny how a word (or phrase) you just learned begins to keep coming up like everywhere! *sorry this is not meant to start a comment thread about something completely off topic.sorry*
kmjvt11 6 months ago
John looks and sounds as if he's been crying. I would have cried too, if i were a cryer...im crying on the inside though, and i feel all your pain even though i didnt know about esther at all untill recently. I will go watch her vlogs though, so i can feel more.
alexis474542 6 months ago
Why do people cry watching this?
People die every day. Sure this is pretty sad but I didn't know this woman existed until now... You guys are a bit over-sensitive.
Palatard 6 months ago
@Palatard Of course people die every day, but that doesn't make death any less tragic. We might not have known Esther personally but we can see everything that she's done and the lasting impact that she's had on this community. You don't have to know someone to know their importance and to feel some kind of connection with them. I cry every time I watch this video because if Esther were alive today, she would be my age and though I didn't know her, I wish I did.
PirateJeans 6 months ago 4
@Palatard I am oversensitive! And gladly so! (and sadly so, and angrily so, and over-emotionally so). Emotions aren't something to be ashamed of. I didn't know she had existed until the day this video originally posted. I didn't cry during the video, but after, I read her twitter and I watched her videos and I saw a young woman handle a disease with some humour, humility and raw humanity that is not rare in existence, but at least rarely seen. That's bound to evoke some emotion! Best wishes.
editingevil 6 months ago
@Palatard She was only 16 freaking years old. She had her whole life to live. We cry because we lost our bestfriend a year ago. Im sorry, but if you had lost someone who meant an incredible amount to you, I would hope you would be upset and cry. Or am I being 'over-sensitive'??
AccioTheatre 6 months ago 2
what did he say at the end? i think i missed it..it was like, esther, my friend, god speed? something like that..anyone who caught it, please tell! im dying to know:) RIA esther, by the way
kmjvt11 6 months ago
@kmjvt11 Yeah it was exactly that.
awm21295 6 months ago
@kmjvt11 He said "Esther, my friend, godspeed.
redvinenerd 6 months ago
I cry. Every. Time. I watch this video.
wellnowthis 6 months ago
I noticed something today. Esther was born the day after I was. And she died the day after John's birthday. It was a coincidence, but an interesting one.
aang94479 6 months ago
the sadness in ur voice is making me tear up stop it :(
bananasandmayo 6 months ago
I cryed so much during this video :'(
ChocoBerrism 6 months ago
:(
I am not sure if I should dislike this video, because this was a tragic event, or to like it, to respect her memory?
EssemenaUploader 6 months ago
165 Should be in Esther's place.
PURPLESHIRTGAMER 6 months ago
I cried... this video was posted on my 19th birthday.
TheGayVlog 6 months ago
i cried
theashleywhocould 6 months ago
I agree with @ToxicZUGGAL0
I'm sure you've heard this many times before but, 165 truly have no heart. I can't even begin to understand why someone would dislike this.
I'm just going to asume that their hand sliped and that they hit the wrong button. Because, I can't imagine that anyone would knowingly dislike this video. It's sadening. Esther, I never knew you. But, I do know how completely amazing you were. Thank you for everything you've tought me. RIA <3
MsShmankYou14 6 months ago
everytime i watch this i sob
allyluvsk8erboys 6 months ago 6
:(
ImJustFelix 6 months ago
wow this is just so sad, I only found out about Esther today, and have watched her videos and she was just so awesome! R.I.A Esther, and I just can't get over how sad this is, really. The end where John is just genuinely emotional just makes me well up every time. It's people like this who should get the views.
myvampireweekday 6 months ago 6
There's hope for world where people who never knew her still cry for her. Happy Esther day. RIA Esther.
IwantToeatyourcheese 6 months ago 7
Comment removed
TheFrenchmenPlatoon 6 months ago
@TheFrenchmenPlatoon Not the right place, asshat.
Kabhaq 6 months ago
hrfdslvjdfsklvfs i want an esther bracelet cause she was an amazing person but paypal's not working for me :*(
JuDyY44 6 months ago
RIA Esther
phantasma616 6 months ago
I didn't even know Esther existed when she was still alive. Yet I cried so much watching this video. R.I.A. Esther - a very real person I wish I had known about earlier.
pixelsofrelativity 6 months ago 311
@pixelsofrelativity same, i read through the blogs from the beginning, the ups and downs, and by the end i was in tears because i knew when it was going to end.
phantasma616 6 months ago
Esther, I haven't been a Nerdfighter for very long, and the first time I was introduced to you was when you had already passed away and John was reminding me to buy my bracelet down in the doobly doo. But now I see just what you meant to all of Nerdfighteria, and also to me. Otherwise I wouldn't be crying right now. DFTBA.
varietychick 6 months ago 4
The world needs more people like esther
TheBrzyr 7 months ago 6
rest in peace esther. although i do not personally know you, i find myself sitting here, one year after your passing, shedding tears for this great loss of an awesome member of the nerdfighter community and an important part to this world. xx
altandF4productions 7 months ago
RIA Esther. We love you. Your star will never go out.
jonasfreak1216 7 months ago
We love you esther. Your star will never go out.
24nerdfighter 7 months ago
Happy birthday Esther. R.I.A. <3
rruiz16 7 months ago
Don't fret for Esther it is a tragedy and a shame that she is gone from our world but one will never die if one is remembered and Esther day has ensured this.
R.I.A. Esther
lolzer646 7 months ago
One of the few Vlogbrothers videos I've never completed, I always end up crying.
R.I.A
PokeZelda6664 7 months ago
who the hell dislikes this video???
ToxicZUGGAL0 7 months ago 282
@ToxicZUGGAL0 maybe they dislike that she died? or they misclicked? the only 2 things i can think of.
cozzy3002 6 months ago
@ToxicZUGGAL0 people who have secret lover shrines to Hitler and Satan, and all that is evil.
EmoWolfMaster 6 months ago 2
@ToxicZUGGAL0 Probably people who are sad about Esther and didn't know another way to communicate it otherwise.
alwayzjello 6 months ago
@ToxicZUGGAL0 Maybe they just didn't like the fact that Esther died...
thesasquatchdinosaur 6 months ago
@ToxicZUGGAL0 Because she's dead...
PingyRules55555 5 months ago in playlist More videos from vlogbrothers