Retsufrash - Pursuit (Part 1/3)

[videogamenostalgia]

'Alright, we need a name for our villain. A drug-dealing, murderous psychopath. An absolutely terrifying individual, whose dark influence has claimed countless lives and left thousands more in abject terror. A name that would really reflect that and strike fear into the hearts of even the strongest law enforcer...'

'I have one. It's perfect'

'What?'

'...Dan...'

[kefkasakura]

@videogamenostalgia Yeah. Fuck Shao Khan, Genghis Khan, or Adolf Hitler. Daniel McNeely is the name to run away at sonic speed.

[sirawesoman]

00:14 Who else heard that as "The Armor Gamzees"?

[GenjiFirefly]

@sirawesoman It sounds EXACTLY like his name.

*Cracks open Faygo*

[JakAttack12345]

Oh God, I remember this game. Goddamn repressed memories...

[Iceroadlion]

It seems they stole my license plate.

[BoboTalkClown]

Oh shit, ARMORED gamzee?! We're fucked.

[jettythesunfish]

All heroines need their potassium (?)

[MrGuyPwnsYou]

The ARMOR. GAMSEES.

What.

[mewtwo711]

Poor Proteus, this caused him to have a BSoD.

[nejinaji]

MAYBE you wouldnt have been almost raped if you had just left instead of taking 20 minutes collecting random shit.

[DyeTalian]

I know this game is shit and it makes a bad name for us Christians....but Dialysis's voice gets me hard. Just gonna say that now.

[DodgingAndWeaving]

Apparently Jesus fish is DABOMB

[JDWtri]

I never leave the house without my light bulb Steve, he is my best friend also I can't seem to stop eating razor blades. PRAISE JESUS!

[fireflocs]

When she fights the guy in the hallway, her wound changes locations. The way she holds her gun changes too.

[CuriousMoth]

I've watched for 5 minutes and I literally can't stand this game.

[TehNoun]

I have a feeling their relationship would be over the second he saw what she did to his car.

[posthumanfetus]

I think there was some joke on Family Guy about Peter getting locked inside his own car, too. A Peter is clinically retarded. Yeah.

[Demock]

moooon logic!!!

[themisanthropex]

"DABOMB with a Jesus Fish? What the fuck does that even MEAN?!" - Proteus4994

[grottypissedstained]

THERE'S MY TEDDY BEARRRR

[spiderfred1]

Now how could I forget my banana?

[XGiftedGamerX]

Omg I was laughing so hard!

So many things about this game that are just wrong!

[feh2]

0:40 It's like the Double Dragon Arcade Machine inside of the Double Dragon Movie.

[StrongRushmore]

You can look to the sides to see their faces in the car.

AND HE NEVER MOVES HIS FUCKING HANDS WHILE DRIVING.

[GamerUntouch]

armor gamsees is armor games

bad joke?

or worst joke?

[SuperJollypirate]

The chick looks like she has Wolverine hair at the beginning.

[bobertthepenguin]

1:42 OH NO YOU GAVE AWAY THE AMAZING ENDING!!!!

[schumacherenator]

She sleeps on... a giant cheese sandwich?

[akiratubo]

I guess Mickey went to the trouble of rigging his car so that it couldn't be unlocked from inside just in case he needed to trap his girlfriend for some reason. He sounds like a hell of a guy.

[CommanderMantis]

If you're ever attacked and suffer a bloody concussion in the resulting struggle, you shouldn't bother going to the hospital or alerting the police. Just trade quips with your boyfriend and get your dumb ass locked in a car.

Like it says in the bible.

[BlaqheartXZ]

@CommanderMantis Well, the concussion may or may not be related to being locked in a car. I don't think you would be able to stand upright for around a few days if your concussion was that bad, but still...

[Moonchipz]

These guys need to play Touhou to see some REAL maid action.

[CommanderMantis]

@Moonchipz

Don't you remember Embodiment of Scarlet Devi, where you defeated Sakuya by locking her in a car, or how you defeated Hong Meiling by rubbing her with an oil-smeared teddy bear?

[jettythesunfish]

@Moonchipz I think playing as Sakuya would've been much better. All she'll need are knives.

[ImperishableCat]

7:30

I saw a "SK8ER" license plate with a Jesus fish in real life, so I guess anything's possible.

[AdamDuffield]

Does she have to over pronounce every sentance? XD

[Evan121991]

Armored Gamzees? wOaH bRoThEr :o)

[mandrilltiger]

"Somehow she knows she'll need a banana and a teddy bear."

okay now think about the eventually use of the banana... holy crap if she knew she was gonna go finishing would she bring a worm, or actual bait.

Why'd she bring the banana to catch the fish? why a banana?

[Mintergalactic]

"He locked her in the car."

"How is she locked in the- how- but- you can't-"

"I know you can't-"

"But you can't-"

I know you can't, not in any modern car."

[JanitorAntisocial]

"Her boyfriend Dan McNeely."

Holy shit--Proteus unintentionally foreshadowed.

[CasaiAgicap]

In her defense I managed to get locked in my mom's car when I was young and didn't know how car locks worked. So it's not that this game's retarded, she's just four.

[SaturnineSound]

@CasaiAgicap Which would also explain "Growly".

[thevisualboy37]

When you made the Satanic teddy bear joke, I thought of Yu-Gi-Oh: the Abridged Series right away.

"Your mother plays card games in HELL!"

[BlarkUntVhite]

@thevisualboy37 me too hehe

[WhiteTiger225]

@thevisualboy37 Rivers of blood will flow from the innocent!

[grendelee]

So...this is an alternate reality Metal Gear?

[danceswithswords]

actually...you can get locked in a car sadly...ever heard of Child proof locks?

[maket000]

@danceswithswords

Not in the godamned passenger seat Dx

[danceswithswords]

@maket000 Oh god your right! How did I miss that? Oh well The Trapped trilogy is shit anyways >.>

[grendelee]

@danceswithswords thats very sad that you believe that. How many times has this happened to you? LOL

[AAmirkhanov]

How many people turned to atheism thanks to this game?

[chosentonessournotes]

@AAmirkhanov I did! Praise nothing!

[TimrodDX]

@AAmirkhanov

This game has proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that there is no God.

[DreadGir]

@TimrodDX I don't think it proves that there isn't a God. I think it proves that he is there, but just ignoring everyone. He's like, "Okay, fine. You wanna be stupid, screw you too."

[SirTotallyAwesome]

@DreadGir I think what he meant is that there is no way an intelligent, omnipotent, omniscient creator would allow this game to ever be created.

[Prometheusmfd]

@SirTotallyAwesome Clearly this is the work of Lucifer

[momoandmiz]

...Armor Gamsees?

[moneymandate]

I wonder if the guy who made this game ever seriously stopped to think about anything. The plot is incoherent to the point of resembling a fever dream, and the puzzles are fucking hilariously obtuse and contrived. The game is so bad that it loops around and becomes charming in a bizarre way.

[AbortFlight]

Isn't it obvious? She's an Anti-Spiral scout. Every now and then, she goes into A-S mode, hence the echoey, robotic voice.

[MalamiteLtd]

The thug that attacks her. Is that MuscleBomber2021?

Perhaps the girl is the "Amy" he's trying to use a Triple Fudge Packer on.

[PEZhead5432109876]

@MalamiteLtd DAMN YOU, AMY!

HADOUKEN!

[steveharley0345]

@MalamiteLtd

Don't worry, in the hentai version of this game she gets gang raped all up the ass by the triple fudge packers.

[chitoryu12]

I remember playing this series for the first time last year in October, I believe. The sad part was it's NOT the worst game there.

[Wanderer2266]

What is this, I dont even...?

[tt89898989]

The Crime syndicate is titled The Armored Gamsees.

Gamsees

Gamzees

Gamzee.

The escaped series can predict the future.

[ICodeInDreams]

Check related videos. "The Trapped Series AMV?" Seriously? Recorded with Unregistered Hypercam 2, of all things.

[Kryp7K33p3r]

this is so ridiculous and I'm laughing so hard I can't breathe!

[Thomal9]

I know I can't leave my apartment without my phone, a bottle of glue, a coat hanger, two hot dog buns, a can of beans, the kitchen sponge.

[BluntMetroid]

Thank the lord for Proteus.

[HelpfulYoshi]

How do ya get locked in a fucking car? XD

[TheDeathnotejunkie]

TheToast7 no really Christianity is fucked up

[Scoutacris]

... Armoured Gamses?

[666blueyoshi]

at 0:28 when i saw her she kinda looked like wolverine

[gillottt07]

"Is she gonna fuck herself what does she need a banana for" i fell out of my chair cuz of that lmao

[tehgreybob]

Armor Gamsees? And I looked up the name of the founder of Armored game and it's DANielMCNEELY. So, what are they trying to say, that the founder of Armor Games is a godless murderous thug and that he needs Jesus?

[TAGMOMG]

Interestingly, I played this myself (After watching this, no less - I'm just that damn dumb!) And there wasn't any echo at all for me. So, either your recording equipment was fucking around with the sound, or you mannaged to find a bug.

Yep, probably the latter.

[RhiehnD]

I can kind of see how the echo is to indicate her thinking it. But that would mean she arbitrarily switches between talking and thinking mid sentence.

[TheProjectMJ]

I like these games, but you guys are hilarious!

[Shadow78954]

this is why you dont do religion kids, youll be as stupid as the person who made this game.

[TheToast7]

@Shadow78954 this is why you dont do generalization kids, youll be as stupid as the person who made this comment

[TheTurophile]

In the car sequence, the higher-pitched guy is trying to entertain the logic of this game, and all the while the lower-pitched guy is incredulous at being locked INSIDE a car!!! "You can't... you can't... no... no, you know what? Fuck this game..."

[ragrappy00]

"which os used as a radio really eat a handle on a screwdriver intact on it" CC is so fucking funny

[LeRoiSoleilLuv]

this shit is too good when i'm crossfaded.

[FoolishTyphron]

You still can't.

Can never get over that reaction. It's so priceless.

[PiecesofEternity]

"You gluey screw-handle!" is now my new favorite insult.

[bloodrunsclear]

Game riffs!

You guys are geniuses :D

[notyoursavior78]

Wow I can see why the first part was only the third worst game.

[MooseyFate100]

Slowbeef and Eugene Mirman sound exactly the same. It's eerie.

[COWBOYSANDBEER]

@MooseyFate100 On the subject of the RP'ers sounding like certain famous people, who do you think Proteus would sound like?

[MooseyFate100]

@COWBOYSANDBEER Uh, the closest I can get is Jim Florentine.

[DayBreakization]

Freaking Rina-Chan and Omahdon... they are in EVERY flash and ANYTHING that involves voice acting.

[EdmacZ]

How the fuck do you lock someone inside a car?

[OrderofMertuary]

@EdmacZ Child safety lock? But then she wouldn't have been able to unlock it.. GAHHH

[sagacious03]

A banana & a teddy bear. Maybe she plans to go to a bed, cuddle the teddy bear & fuck herself with the banana? But yeah, bad game is bad.

[binderfind]

Bioware this ain't.

[SmNBahamut]

So I tried the auto caption feature. Y'know what came out?

"I did Senator David Vitter after a dozen years, it's from Time Warner."

[Fatality65]

"DABOMB? DABOMB with a jesus fish?! What the fuck does that even mean?"

[Fatality65]

"How could I forget my bananna!"

"Her bananna?"

"Why does she need the bannana for? Is she gonna go fuck herself?!"

[Cooliespy345]

"Mickey and I when we were on our first date. It was awkward, but I know he cares about me."

Cares enough to lock you INSIDE the car.

[ckylandspeedx]

Wait, I thought she got shot the fuck up in the last game.

[ZoomingDakota]

DIS IS MAI TEDDEH BEHR

[77Lupin1]

@Asdz645 It's the bear's gun. She is not allowed to use, or she will suffer the wrath of Teddy.

[Begeru]

Haha this probably one of the worst flash games. It does make just as much sense as the first one where you burn a finger to find a lock pick.

[moniux555]

Cool xD

[EssJay00]

These are possibly the hardest things to sit through.

You can actually hear the smug self satisfaction in their voices with every passing second

[July927]

Her boyfriend might be on to something- if she can't unlock a car from the inside without using tools, she probably needs to be protected.

[Gollon666]

What are you guys talking about? Whenever I leave the house I always bring my gun, knife, banana, light bulb and teddy bear.

[pyramidheadkitten9]

im almost out of breath, let me talk to myself in some pointless monologue!

[SamuraiFoochs]

I think Dialla's larynx is attached to an effect pedal or something.

"Ah ha! I'm silly but with God!"

[BetterThanYou2468]

wait couldnt you just shoot the window out if you need out so bad?

[cyberhoodlum]

Wow, this game makes no sense. I loved how many times the two of you just busted out laughing at the horrible lack of logic in this game. "Yeah, we have to go back into our apartment to see if there were any intruders in the two seconds we were gone... and apparently there was!"

[NaziJesus]

jesus fish

[nitemaricv2]

a bananan and a teddy bear??? then potential rape.. and this is a game about god?!

[TheKingCL]

Oh my fucking god, why the fuck did I unsub to you guys like a year ago?! What the fuck was I thinking?! I'm dying of laughter.. lmao

[EmperorZ19]

I don't know about you guys, but I never leave the house without removing all of the light bulbs from their sockets and taking them with me

[grenadier42]

Proteus' stupified babbling at being locked INSIDE a car is quite possibly the best part of this video.

[WilliamLongfellow]

0:18

Dialla has some gnarly sideburns...

[pwnedTAS]

What is she keeping a banana in the fridge for anyway? Shouldn't it have turned brown by now?

I know, I'm nitpicking. Deal with it :P

[smeagol1414]

"You have a gun, why do you need a knife?!" TO RUN FASTER, OBVIOUSLY, EVERYBODY RUNS FASTER WITH THE KNIFE!

[thapoint09]

This is my bear, Growly. He protects me from danger. 01101100010101

[KirbyRoolz47]

Armor Gameses *cough*subliminal*cough*

[GRUmovies]

Dude, don't be dissing the banana! I'll create a flash game with the view point of the fucking banana!

[sonicfeet]

"I always thought I would be able to see a vagina just like the other bananas--

"but my owner proved me wrong.

"Instead, she treated me like a heathen-- gluing me onto a long, brown and shit-like thing. She forced me to look at some underwater thing's giant vagina that was located in-between its eyes for some reason."

[Roly426]

XFD how'd she get locked in a car?!?!? inside a car

[MacTechHowTo]

" Ohhh.. its about Jesus!"

lol

[LeRoiSoleilLuv]

"This is a green game we forgot the lights" x'D

[Owl1222]

That echoing at the beginning and Proteus' reaction make me laugh every time. "Is she Satan?" XD

That'd be pretty hard for Godlimations to explain, though, if it were true. Of course, it would still make as much sense as everything else.

[23HUZZA]

also she has a gun... Why doesn't she if it is urgent shoot the window open, I saw some flaws but it could be done

[23HUZZA]

in 0:35 why does Mickey Lee star in 'Trapped' when he wasn't in the first flash game, i.e. Trapped... lol

[DarkMage2X]

I really hate Mickey's voice actor.

[kingbooforums]

"is she gonna fuck herself?"

funniest rets ever!

[Gollon666]

She reminded me of that George Carlin joke where he says "Now you just bring the things you know you will absolutely need" what with her grabbing every stupid thing in the house.

Also this girl that doesn't want to be a damsel in distress is apparently no smarter than a dog since she cant open a fucking car door.

[LJGmonster]

Jesus is da BOMB!

[FireJigglypuff2310]

I love how there were two bananas, but she would only pick up a certain banana.

[TotalSimpleton]

That other banana was a monolith.

[Bocom]

Isn't that thug just escaping through your window?

I mean, she just shoots him in the eye and then runs for the exit, evidence suggests that he just ran away.

[FaggotsOfAmerica]

da bomb with a jesus fish next to it.

EXPLODING JESUS

[rayraygottago]

i hate how every female character in any flash has sassy voice acting. it irritates me.

[Joe402]

that's a really goony thing to say

[loldude83]

@rayraygottago I don't know what you mean by "sassy", but you're probably just hearing the same girl, the one who did this(She goes by Rina-chan) also did/does like 70% of girls in newgrounds flashes and a lot of other internet stuff.

So the voice you hate is most likely not similar sounding voices, but actually the same girl. Still don't know you mean by sassy, though.

That being said, I like her voice, and she a nice girl. And her voice's inflection doesn't sound different from others to me.

[rayraygottago]

@loldude83 I'm well aware it's Rina-chan. I just don't like her voice acting, it's just about the same for me every time I hear her. Also, I have heard other flashes where the girl sounds exactly like this. Trust me, I know what I'm talking about

[Thanatos0123456789]

Her eyes change from Purple, to Blue, to Green. Consistency Fail, or Disguise Win?

[DarkMage2X]

4:06 Uh..., why does he look like a Punch-Out character?

[RobGrix]

Didn't you know ? Besides a fishing rod, you can combine the Teddy Bear and the Banana with the Super-Glue in the game so she can please her self with the new item ? :3

[jet4212006]

make a podcast

[HisuroKun]

2:15- "Oh gawd..."

Bi- BILLY! IS THAT YOU?!

[XIII13lak]

Jesus Christ, the main chicks preparedness of crap up to and including the lightbulb rivals Batman! "Never know when a lightbulb will come in handy." Me: HOW WOULD YOU KNOW YOU DUMBASS!

[TotalSimpleton]

She's all prepared like that because she doesn't want to rely on anybody else to gather all the materials.

See, she doesn't want to be portrayed as the damsel in distress.

[glitchz1]

You can get locked inside a car. My that kind of lock that is shown inside the game are impossible to open, and the button that opens the locks only works in the key is in the car which it won't because you can only lock the car with the keys

[nintendonut888]

Even if that's true, there was nothing stopping her from using any of her tools to break the window.

[Ben500]

"You can't-"

"I know you can't."

"But you CAN'T-"

"I KNOW you can't!"

I just love your guys' reaction to that unbelievable scenario.

[LessthanJake14]

@Ben500 And the constant "Fuck this game!"

Genius.

[DrolKeegEht]

5:11

I expected the car to blow up while Mickey put on shades.

[Schpoonfish]

I seriously need to write an analysis of gender roles and interaction in the Trapped Series. There's so many degrees of bizarre misogynistic chauvinistic fuckedupness that manages not to make sense at any point.

[Mikodite]

Armor Games? Armor Gamees?

Where's Sonny when you need him?

[Chef033]

so what the fuck is a gamsee anyway

[Dygeron92]

You get a banana, a teddy bear, a lightbulb, a gun, a knife, and a letter. You then get attacked by a thug for 10 seconds before you shoot him, and another broke into your house in that range of time. Instead of investigating, you go to your boyfriends car only for him to lock you in somehow. To unlock the car, you glue a screwdriver together to remove a panel and use the pocket knife to pick the locking mechanism in the car when you can just do so WITHOUT THE SCREWDRIVER.

Wow, just wow.

[MrMuggy]

My brain hurts.

[soulhunter711]

3:28

sooo funny!

[DancerAngel22]

If that was actually a movie I wouldn't want to see it because it would be very short.

[SenseiLeRoof]

"If only I had a screwdriver..."

If only she had a BRAIN. Carrying around half a dozen uselessthings that could've, oh, I don't know, BROKEN THE WINDOW...

[xb360ga]

protius you world make a really bad jigsaw piss in a cola bottle

[earthnuggets]

How could I forget my banana?

[LeRoiSoleilLuv]

"Ohh, it's by Jesus..."

Proteus sounds so worried xD

[MoonIMover]

So you guys are saying you DON'T take a teddy bear, a piece of paper, a banana, a gun, a knife, and a lightbulb with you everywhere you go?

[MSkull01]

Her teddy bear protects her from danger . . . but she has a gun.

[xRavioliSumox]

Cars don't work that way.