Funniest Joke I Ever Heard 1984 George Burns

[MannyWar711]

Try listening to Roy Hudds recollection of English music hall when the answer to Manjari, is "oh if you must!"

[Dogwarrior]

He said once he was trying to make it in show business but he needed a lucky break... and he finally got it and he married her... That was Gracie, his wife. He said at first she had the straight line and he told the joke punch lines and she still got the laughs. So he changed it around. He said all he had to do was say hello to the audience and she talked for 30 years and he became a star.

[tjman543]

WHO HERE LIKES A GOOD STORY ABOUT A BRIDGE?

[Grundsau47]

Everybody reading this, do yourselves a favor, do a search for Burns & Allen on YT, watch 'em as you just sit back and laugh...

[miceinfreefall]

Stop putting the jokes in the description! Let George Burns tell it!

[Bilbobangboom]

THIS MOTHER FUCKER LIVED TO BE 100 HOLY SHIT

[Grifiki]

Funniest Joke I ever heard 2011 Barack Obama is president, and thinks he's going to win again."

[Latimew]

I love how it's "Dick Clark Productions", and the symbol is two round circles (almost) with a long stick in the middle.

[wernervoss48]

Larry King sounds like George Burns, Burns is older, Larry follows George, so the comparison is from younger to older.... duh..?

George Burns while Gonzo Fiddles. The Muppet Show.

[yryriza]

He says their trunk is missing, not their drunk!

[chanctonbury63]

Never got George Burns. It was like `funny` was Burns legal trademark. If George Burns says something its funny, and dont you forget it. Its official. If you dont find Burns `funny` youre an asshole etc. I never heard anyone less `funny` than Burns. Burns made millions out of thin air. Fuck I wish I could do that.

[yryriza]

@chanctonbury63 Then you're an asshole, etc.

[rickmarkson]

@chanctonbury63 All G Burns jokes go over my six year old son's head too.

[kubek]

He sounds like Larry King

[fromthesidelines]

The picture of George, Jack and Bing is from when they performed "Goldie, Fields and Glide" on a 1954 filmed episode of "THE JACK BENNY PROGRAM" (which happened to be produced for Jack by George's company, McCadden Productions), 'Carl'. George talked extensively about Jessel [and his sad fate] in "All My Best Friends", and frequently had him as a guest on George & Gracie's radio show in the '40s.

[fromthesidelines]

I remember this story [especially the punch line]; George retold it in at least TWO of his books. As Jack Benny once said in his introduction to George's first book, "I Love Her, That's Why!" (1955), "George never tells the same story twice".

[bludrugo29]

NO ADS ON VIDEOS!

[ROCKSTARCRANE]

Anyone who shows up here, go get George Burns' book "All My Best Friends". You will thank me eternally after reading it.

[KaptKan1]

@ROCKSTARCRANE I got it years ago, and you're right; it's a must read for all Burns fans!

[tubovluv]

My name is George Burns too! Anybody else?

[KaptKan1]

@tubovluv I'd be more impressed if your name were "Nathan Birnbaum".

[SickAudi]

I dont get it lol please tell me?

[CarlDuke]

@SickAudi The joke is that Brown was so insensitive and so lacking in understanding that he could compare the death of one's mother to lost luggage.

[mpoertner]

@CarlDuke Thats it? Not very funny...

[vinyard7777]

@CarlDuke Thanks for thee clarification, I didn't get it.... Thumbs up.

[LukeWapelhorst]

@CarlDuke

I believe that's incorrect, at least in my opinion. I believe they think he lost is mother as she is actually is lost; you know how older people are.

[mondofzz]

I hope after 80 years in show business that wasn't the funniest joke he ever heard.

[dnt9217]

Gracie is George's good luck charm; he just can't perform without her.

[ogamiitto42]

Aww, this was so touching. Having Gracie's picture next to him you can see they were good together.

[UncleMikeNJ]

George Burns never told a joke older than he was.

There weren't any.

[iamaweasel]

@UncleMikeNJ Boom, Boom!!

[KarinPluss]

George is just so cute! And the way he stands there in front of Gracie's picture - they were just the sweetest couple!

[CarlDuke]

@KarinPluss George used to tell of going to Gracie's resting place every week and talking to her for about an hour. He said he had no idea if she heard him, but he said it did a world of good for him. Recently a station called Antenna TV has been replaying the old Burns and Allen shows. They repeatedly show two pictures in his den. One of George, Jack Benny and Bing Crosby. The other is of George, Jack and Eddie Cantor. And in monologues he regularly refers to old friend Georgie Jessel.