Craig Ferguson Twilight Vampire Diss

[bkdlis101]

Hahaha Ghoul's Gym

[15peewee12]

Twilight a love story of a girl trying to fuck a wolf or dead guy.Heres a funny thing hes a vampire.vampires have no blood he cant get it up and the other guys a wolf so small and doggy style.Necro-phillia or beastiallity

[omgalreadyinuse]

lol I think the plasma blood TV joke went completely over the audience's heads

[themesiasinrs]

sow true

i love craig ferguson he is awesome

[PFXProductions]

NOS-4-A2 CAN DANCE CIRCLES AROUND EDWARD!

[HoppyNinja]

Facetube xD

[Misty306]

I'm taking a class on Gothic Literature, some of which contains the original vampire stories (I'm not just talking about "Dracula"). My mother is a Vincent Price fan and I watched "Buffy" and "Angel." All the modern vampire stories are well done, but Stephanie Meyer should have left the vampire alone and stuck with "The Host" (which is surprisingly excellent).

[MrsNathanKress4Ever]

lmao.... face-tube and the tweety-bot XD

[turbojugendx]

Craig's vampire voice is sexy.

[DrStrangebomb1993]

@Stephenie Meyer.

1) Vampires do not sparkle, they burn, in the sunlight.

2) Vampires suck blood, not cock.

3) We're up to our ass reading about "Edward's stone chest", give us plot development.

4) Don't write anything else during your lifetime.

Signed,

One Who Was Forced To Read New Moon By His Twihard Cousin.

[Misty306]

@DrStrangebomb1993 Sorry you were forced to read it!

[DrStrangebomb1993]

@Misty306 I am too. It's scandalous how they compare this Twilight mess to Harry Potter. It's like shit compared to cream.

[concaran]

I dont really hate Twilight, but I'm not a fan of it either. To me, Twilight doesnt have anything to do with vampires, it is more of a teenage movie. Basically, it is a movie about 2 guys who love the same girl. So sometimes I dont understand why people get so pissed off about which guy is better. I mean even the question: who will Bella choose?, is rather superfluous since we all know she'll choose Edward anyway. So really, why the big fuss?

[Cmil619]

My opinion: Twilight turned the werewolf-vampire horror conflict into a weird version of "The Bachelorette." "Who will Bella choose: The tan werewolf she has a history with, or the pale, twinkly vampire?" Team Edward (vampire) or Team Jacob (werewolf)? Here's how I feel (No offense to Stephanie Meyer):Why can't we all just say the Bella's a dyke (lesbian, in case some of you don't know (but i doubt it)), and move on with our lives?!?!?!

[ghetto0superstar]

TWILIGHT IS GAY...BUT STEPHNIE MEYER IS GAYER

[VanyelX]

@ghetto0superstar and you're a moron who doesn;t know how to use their english words properly. Gay means happy, or homosexual, and neither of those things are negative. Grab a dictionary next time you homophobe.

[ghetto0superstar]

@VanyelX

thanks for the info now get back in the closet

[hughmountbatten]

*pushes his hands against his hands and shakes them * OEEEH I CARE ABOUT YOUR FEEELIINGSS whahah that's what he always says in other disses xd

[Babyta00]

1 vampire dislike it :))))))))))))))))

[waittilyouseemy]

pasty listening faces hahaha

[HoppyNinja]

Ahh that plasma one is gold xD

[dustfinger5691]

undead abs of steel....lol XD

[jek21]

I love his Andy Rooney impression

[melissaeh18]

I think he is getting Vampires and Zombies a little mixed up.

[ThisIsNotCashAtAll]

i love how Craig says 'good'

[tomgoulet]

This guy's too funny.

[sr71ablackbird]

whoever reads that twilight crap needs to read the original book of vampires, it's by a guy by the name of Bram Stoker, it's called Dracula !!!!!!!!!!

[oneshotofcoffee]

That person who hate this video. <_< Don't watch Craig. HE. HATES. TWILIGHT. XD You TwiTard.

[ToksPianoTube]

perhaps the funniest thing I've seen yet.

[Reaperluver]

"A vampire should be a silent predator of the night, not someone you friend up with on MySpace!"

Takes the man who played NOS-4-A2 to know what a REAL VAMPIRE is like! XD

(Fans of the cartoon "Buzz Lightyear of Star Command" will know who I'm talking about! XD)

[anglofdrkness101]

@Reaperluver totly all true vampier fans got to love nossie ^^

[epik78]

One repetition

[CnetProductions2]

The vampires worked out before they got turned into vampires, when they become dead they don't age, or lose their figure.

[charlottefx100]

@AshLuvsJonnyStew he is by blood :) and he is fine :)

[GymnasticsGirl6163]

What ever happened to capes?

[charlottefx100]

guys this is my uncle ! seriously hes my uncle

[AshLuvsJonnyStew]

@charlottefx100 -- awesome! How is he your uncle? Through marriage or by blood?

[Reaperluver]

@charlottefx100

You are SO freaking LUCKY!!!!!!

[LemmeLieHere]

I wanted to like Twilight. I really did. But I knew from the preview that it was more 'Teen Romance" than "Vampire Story". My niece and her hubby wanted me to go with them, so I did. They were disappointed, but it was pretty much what I expected.

'Eclipse' (Twilight 3) almost suckered me in with the battle between the vampires and werewolves, but I didn't want to sit through the parts where that stupid twit of a girl can't make up her mind. Nor did I want to rent the 2nd one, to catch up.

[adinareis]

@LemmeLieHere, it was a big f***ing let down. it wasn't even a real battle.

[bigfrosty333]

anyone out there that likes vampires and hates twilight should watch Hellsing Ultimate. its an anime. its pure awesome. Team Alucard For Life!

[Nickman32]

I bet when Stephanie Meyer was lil' she had a stack of Superboy comics, a St. Bernard, and the biggest crush on the little albino boy across the street. Case closed.

[usergently]

5 words: "Let the right one in", greatest vampire movie, yet. Peace out!...Fergie rules!

[marrydruli]

oan!tuu!tri repetitions!

[mrsbeccaflowers]

i salute you, Mr. Ferguson.

[txrocker1227]

and I thought I couldn't love him more

[tokman20]

face tube XD HAHAHA damn this guy is funny! they need to show this on comedy on foxtel instead of letterman.

[twilightsagalover31]

I LOVE TWILIGHT but this is pretty funny

[ItalianSunset14]

I have to say admit it...I like twilight but this is fucking hilarious! It's so true xD

[FancyStarbucksOrder]

Finally! I'm so sick of all these girls reading these stupid romance vampire books! Bleh!! Real men don't sparkle!

[MisguidedSpunk]

stephanie meyer and her "vampire" saga twilight almost killed the vampire trend but charaline harris and true blood brought it back thank god!

[crabbieappleton]

@MisguidedSpunk Craig includes True Blood in his contempt for vampires that are "sexy and not really vampires. They're like sex addicts with big teeth."

[LemmeLieHere]

I love it every time Craig makes fun of Twilight. I like vampire fiction and movies, and I think Twilight may kill the recent vampire trend.

Vampires do not sparkle in the sun-- they burst into flame. Vampires are not your gay best friend-- they're dangerous, and deadly, and sexy in a way that doesn't leave you in doubt about their gender preference.

[LoganDarc]

Couldn't have said it better myself. Stephanie Meyer should check out some of the vampire-themed roleplay sites out there, like the one I'm a member of... maybe then she'll have a better idea what a vampire should be.

[princessgraves]

@LemmeLieHere Preach it hunny!!!!

[Davedog221]

@LemmeLieHere I 100% agree with you. Vampires that walk around during the day turn to ash and do not want to marry their food. I have never even seen the Twilight movies and have no intention. They're not real vampire!

[VanyelX]

@LemmeLieHere exactly how does deadly and sexy have anything to do with sexual preference? You sound like a bigot to me, and it's really sad that people like you have so much to say,. and yet it's all full of veiled hate and insults. Go back to your hate and leave the rest of us alone.

[LemmeLieHere]

@VanyelX What? Some people will take anything you say and twist it so they can feel self-righteous. My remark about vampires not being your 'gay best friend' was a quote from Craig. The rest was a comment on how vampires are supposed to be equal parts sexy and scary... unlike the emo vampires in 'Twilight', who are not scary at all.

I didn't mean to offend... but I'm not too concerned that you're offended, either. If you don't like people dissing 'Twilight', stop watching videos that do so.

[Evaquiel]

@LemmeLieHere I agree with you, but true vampire fans don't get affected for some twilight shit, its just harder for new people to know whats good vampire movie.

[crazyhoolagirl]

Win

[HerDeepestFears]

Ok so I'm one of the nerds who got the plasma joke and I must say...bravo craig...bravo

=]

[ootinanai]

so brilliant!!

[extenebrislux]

"Finally, a joke for us!"

Gotta love him!!!

[3A7C]

Craig should have done "The Count's" punctuating laugh, in his joke about the Ghoul's Gym.

Hollywood is vapid and superficial.

Vampires aren't scary, they look like douch-bags from a club, just like Twilight.

Pirates aren't scary, they look like douch-bags from a club, just like Pirates of the Caribbean.

[superjay42]

HAHA i love how he congratulates himself after the plasma joke :D

[balrog13571]

This man knows what he's talking about. In fact I remember when I was young I used to watch that Buzz lightyear of Star Command show and Craig actually voiced a vampire robot guy named Nos-4-A2 (pun on Nosferatu). While I don't really consider robot vampires a huge successful idea compared to Dracula for example, even that was above Edward. PLus Craig gave him an awesome voice.

[demoskisame]

@balrog13571 i didnt kno craig voiced him

[blaukat]

ghouls gym! LMAO

[Poojauppal]

I HATE TWILIGHT

[ProtestantIRA]

Damn right.

[Lizy10]

"plasma screens... made with real plasma" lol

[LoloDex]

so right. so hot. Love you craigs!

[jack16895]

calm down twilight freak!

[VampTramp123]

Awesome! Just awesome! He does have a point.

[SanaLovesMahado1]

Geez, Twilight Freak, don't have a freak out. :(

[demoskisame]

didnt u read the name its a freak that likes twilight wich in itself is freaky its impossible for a freakout not to appear. dumb queer ass sparkly fag vampires