I think that these "nice guys" believe that physical intimacy is a right that they deserve for being "nice" rather than a privilege to be earned by actually being a nice person who is worthy of being in a relationship, not just acting nice to get laid.
It's just one great video after another with you. I remember I was being checked out and almost touched by a grown 30 year old man when I was about ten. I was so uncomfortable and horrified, and whenever I tell that to a man, he says "You should be grateful you looked that good!" Sometimes, men need to realize that women's lives don't revolve around the approval of their penis >_>
Everyone in society needs to humble themselves. People need to do what they and mind each other's business.
I just have one question, it's been bugging me for a while now: why do USAians call singlets "wife-beaters"? That is SUCH a horrible term for a simple garment of clothing. Eugh!
@CalamityM Because the stereotypical redneck white trash mechanic who gets drunk on Pabst Blue Ribbon and beats his wife wears them, so they're called wife-beaters.
@CarFox6 ... Yeeeah. Once again, I'm glad I' don't live in USA. Were I live, office workers wear them under their shirts; it's a white-collar thing, not a 'shitty-excuse-for-a-human-being' thing.
So true. I like you because you're intelligent, and I think you make really great videos with insightful comments, you argue your opinions well, I like your reviews, and I think you have very interesting ideas. Yes, you have great boobs, and yes, you should own that and not be afraid to wear whatever you want. It's your body and you should do whatever you're comfortable with. Who said you can't be hot and smart? :) Love your videos, don't stop any time soon!
it's fucked up discussions like these, that makes me feel glad to be a uncaring son of a bitch...fuck it.. people or just looking to other people to fill these psychological oles that they have within them selves...so until people learn how fill those oles them selves, this matter of male and female reaction to compliments will never end.
Women are not stupid right? Ok now that we've established that dont pretend to be... Women who dress sexually provacative, dress that way to get the attention. The problem with that is those women get attention from unattaractive men aswell, and that's the part they don't like. If a man walks around with pants that show his big cawk he's gonna get alot of attention also, just like a woman who wears something highlighting her breast, butt, or vagina. whens the last time some1 said vagina..
When I was 14, I stayed a summer in Brazil with a friend's family. If I wore normal clothes (jeans, long-sleeved t-shirt or blouse) and light makeup, I had full-grown, 30 and 40-some year old men whistling and hollering and pestering me. I was horrified!
reading the comments here just saddens me. seems like most viewers agree with you that all men are horny dogs who only compliment women when they want to sleep with them. i know you're an open-minded person and i assume most of your viewers are the same way, which is why it's upsetting to see all these narrow-minded judgements towards men. after all the disagreements we've had over the past couple of years i've been subbed, this is the first time i've ever lost a little bit of respect for you.
@Cuddlebunzzzz Except, that is not what I said in the least. what I said was, that due to girl having to deal with stares/looks for guys from the time of puberty makes women in general apprehensive about male compliments and (sorry) it means all compliments. It makes us uncomfortable at times. It is not because we think all guys are horn-dogs who can't think with their crotch and from the years you've subed me you'd know that I don't think that. (cont)
@Cuddlebunzzzz 2. However, what you are not getting is that it isn't personal. Both genders (like I said in the video) deal with disenchantment with the opposite due to their experiences. It's not a personal vendetta against you, but you don't understand the female perspective, which is what I'm discussing. Do you know what it's like to be 12-years old and have men old enough to be your grandparents looking down your shirt or trying to feel you up?
@MelinaPendulum i understand why women are generally defensive when men give them compliments. but that doesn't mean it's ok to outright dismiss every single guy who gives you an innocent compliment without giving him time to reveal what his motives are. as i mentioned in another comment, women have been rude to me even when my compliments weren't about their looks. there's no reason to be THAT defensive unless you've been through something really traumatic, and i doubt they all had been.
@Cuddlebunzzzz Except, you don't know. You don't know what the girl has been through or has dealt with to know why she wouldn't be aggressive when it comes to compliments. I would imagine that for her to be that upset about it in the first place indicates that she's had a previous history of that happening. You only see this through the prospective of the guy and think that because you know your compliment is innocent, she does. That she can somehow tell your motives are legit.
@Cuddlebunzzzz You have been on my youtube forever, you've seen the number of comments I get on my breasts when they are shown in a low cut top. You don't think that bothers me? That it doesn't make me apprehensive about the compliments I get on other things? Well it does and yeah to you it might seem silly, but to me, who has to deal with it on a daily basis, it's not. You guys should be as understanding of that, as you expect us to be about not thinking you all are horn-dogs.
@MelinaPendulum like i said, i understand why you and women in general are defensive. but i don't think that justifies being rude to any and every compliment a guy gives you. if it's something stupid like "nice tits lololol" then he deserves to be bitched at. if it's "nice hair; nice shoes; i like that video you made; i like what you said about that one subject," etc, give him time to show if he's sincere or not.
@Cuddlebunzzzz and like I said before, just because you give a woman a compliment does not mean they have to be responsive to you. If they are not responsive to you, then count your losses and move on. I have had bad experiences with men and yet I'm not like "ah fuck all men all they think with is their dicks I hate them blah-blah-blah." I recognize that I probably wasn't their type and they just did not like me. and that's the other thing...they may just not be into you.
@MelinaPendulum i wish that the worst that would happen was that they weren't responsive to me. i'd rather be ignored for complimenting someone than be scolded at for complimenting someone, which is what happened most of the time.
also, i've never complimented a woman that i'm interested in in hopes of gaining her affection. i only compliment people just because i feel like being nice. which is a feeling that i've been getting a lot less lately, but that's another story.
@Cuddlebunzzzz look, in this video all I tried to do was explain the reasons why women are sometimes apprehensive. You don't think that men equally do shitty things that make us wanna be bitter at you? It works both ways, and like I said in the video, you are not entitled to ANYTHING from your compliments, because it is not up to you to decide how they are taken. If I give you a compliment and it comes off the wrong way, you have every right to scold/bitch/etc at me.
@Cuddlebunzzzz You relate to Larry's video because you are also male and have had similar experiences, I'm sure you also relate to the male opinions about girls in his comments because he is male and his points are from the male point of view. However, those ideas are equally as narrow minded, because they are one side of the picture.
@MelinaPendulum how is being upset that most (not all) women i've talked assume i don't respect them and only want them for sex just as narrow-mined as assuming that all guys only compliment women because they want them for sex? i will admit that me refusing to compliment women anymore because of my past experiences is close-minded, but i don't think deciding to not compliment women is on the same level as assuming all guys only make compliments because they're horny bastards.
@Cuddlebunzzzz Except, I never said all men were horny bastards did I? No, I only explained why women are apprehensive about compliments. You are taking this as a personal attack on you. No one is saying you are a horny bastard and you have bad intentions. No, but you can not assume that just because you give a woman a compliment she has to be (1) grateful or (2) responsive. It is her prerogative and if she's being foul, then you move on. Like I said in the video maybe you
@Cuddlebunzzzz are looking at the wrong women. Like I said in the video, if every guy/girl you talk to reacts a certain way and the only common denominator is you, then maybe you are doing something wrong. You are so seeing all these comments/video and using it to somehow validate what you think, when the real problem is like of inter-gender understanding. I didn;t make this video to talk down to men and I don't talk down to them in it. I made it because a lot of you do not
@MelinaPendulum if simply being physically unattractive counts as doing something wrong, then i'm well aware that i'm going about it the wrong way. however, it's still not right to assume that just because an ugly guy compliments you, even on something not related your looks, it means he only wants to have sex with you. i don't get what's wrong or sexual about saying "you made a great point in that discussion in class earlier" or something similar. yet i still get dismissed for saying that.
@MelinaPendulum so based on what i've heard from this video and these comments, i've learned that it's never ok to compliment a woman unless it's obvious that she's interested in you, or if she's a good friend. am i correct?
@Cuddlebunzzzz Nope and nope, but I will respond to you in the messages, because I don't want to clog up the comment board, plus I can't get all my thoughts out with these character limits.
there have even been times when i've complimented women on their intelligence and they still thought i was trying to get in their pants. one time after my political science class, i complemented a woman who had said something interesting during the class discussion. all she did was give me a mean look and tell me she had a boyfriend. even after i told her i was just trying to be nice and wasn't expecting anything from her, she just said "whatever" and walked away.
the video you replied to was about non-sexual compliments. he was talking about his experience with women flipping out over him complimenting their shoes or their hair, even though he wasn't expecting anything from it. i can relate to him, and what this video tells me is that women assume any and every compliment from a guy has sexual undertones, even if it's something we would also say to our parents. which is why i just don't compliment women anymore. we're not all horny dogs.
This may or may not go to this vid but when I was in 7th or 8th grade. I was loner I never talked with anybody and all of a sudden there was a rumor going around saying that I gave head to someone. He was older than me and I did not know what that was at the time. He was going off to highschool.
This is a good video with a great point. I find the issue that is the largest problem is entitlement. One of my best friends whom i treat as if she is my sister is gorgeous but has to live with that as a dilemma. Virtually every guy she interacts with is trying some way "in" and all she wants to do is hang and play video games. But so many feel that they are entitled to have shots with people and thats just greedy and selfish. First its Oh you're so beautiful, then after rejection its B#$#$
I don't know, maybe it's just me, but when a guy that I don't know gives me a compliment on my looks, it sounds sort of sleazy to me. It always seems kind of underhanded, in a way, and my sister feels this way at times too. Even when the compliment is sweet or at least, above reproach it feels like the guy is trying to get something. But, personally, if someone gives me a compliment, I will acknowledge it, thank them, and move on (so long as the compliment is actually a compliment, obviously.)
So true... A lot of times wen ppl I don't know really well giv me compliments I usually just say thanks & half the time I'm not even flattered cuz I'm thinking "what the fuck do u want from me? R u like trying to tease me or sumthing? (especially at school cuz I'm a loser to be u
"OMG MALE ATTENTION!" This in particular is so true. There seems to be this assumption in society that women should want to be looked at, and if men deem to grace us with attention that we should be greatful--because, you know, male attention gives women's lives meaning. It's nothing new, either, the "Male Gaze" (i.e. women, but not men, should desire to be looked at by the opposite sex) as a concept has been around for a while.
3-3:03 YES. Oh my God, yes. I've been making this argument for a whiel and haven't heard other people say it. I'm so sick of "nice guys" who complain about how much of a bitch a girl is because he's nice and she won't date him.
It is my opinion that whatever women wear men will find something sexually attractive about you. Men are really just hardwired to notice these things and some are stupid enough to give rude compliments. It isn't your fault, wear what you feel comfortable wearing. Regardless, women really do need to have self respect and men really do need to have respect for you.
I'm sorry to play devils advocate but if I gave a compliment to a woman wearing skimpy clothes, She'd respond: "Just because I'm wearing this doesn't mean I'm a whore." Which reminds me of the joke David Chapelle made where he said, "That's correct gentlemen, just because they dress that way doesn't mean they are that way." But that's like me dressing in a cop uniform and a person yelling, "Oh officer, help us!" Just because I dress this way doesn't mean I'm a police officer."
I love you! ^____^ I wish I had the confidence (?) to rock low cut tops like you, I always feel self conscious about people looking (especially men and their trucks)/the way many of my girlfriends comment negatively on it. It's not my fault I've got a generous pair of boobs. :[ I always feel I have to dress like a nun from the waist up. I'm not saying I dress like one, but, well, I agree with you. :] You make an excellent point with the rest of the video too.
This was a pretty good response that's relatable to both sexes, if you're looking for something different besides a guy who's a dog stop looking for them and if you're looking for a girl who's just into thugs stop looking for them. I hate that people expect to find something different but they don't bother to venture.
Compliments should be given sincerely, and without any expectations other than a thank you, or not given at all. Treat women with respect, and as intelligent human beings, who know the difference between a genuine compliment, and a blatant attempt to get laid. Don’t be rude or crude, and you will be fine.
@DragonflyNoir10 if you watched the video she replied to, you'd see that based on his experience, and mine, and many other males, being sincere, respectful, and non-sexual/flirtatious with a woman still pisses them off most of the time. in the video he explains that women flip out over even innocent compliments that we would say to our parents.
@Cuddlebunzzzz You’re right. I should have watched the original video. Having said that, and having watched the original, I still feel compliments should be given sincerely, and without expectations. If you're truly sincere, just giving the compliment should be enough.
I really have no idea why a person would respond to a compliment in such a manner. Except perhaps, to denture any further commutations, which is a rude/childish way of doing it. I don’t condone rudeness at all!
@DragonflyNoir10 being sincere SHOULD be enough, which is the point Larry was making and that i agree with. the problem is that 9 times out of 10, women don't give us a chance to show if we're really sincere, and dismiss us instantly because they just assume that we only complimented her in an attempt to have sex with her.
@Cuddlebunzzzz I think you’ve missed my point. When I say "should be enough” I mean it should be enough for you. When I give a compliment, my only expectation is a thank you. If a woman is in to you, she will respond in kind, and if she is not…I’m sure she has her reasons. Again, I don’t condone rudeness at all.
I don't mind getting on or two complements from a guy I don't know, but when they stary to all out flirt, then I tell them to fu*k off.
This is the reason I wear very baggy clothes. I got po'd when I was at an antique shop and the decrepit 90 some year old shop owner followed me around just to see my boobs. And I was only 14!
I love your comment about nice guys feeling entitled. I went through that phase for too long and came up with the same conclusion eventually. To be so young you are very wise. Keep up the good work.
I have received compliments from women who I was in no way attracted to and I am always flattered and gracious whether I was interested or not. I do understand that guys can be aggressive and that women have to be defensive at times because of this. I also understand that many women are fatigued by constant attention. However, if the person is polite and respectful their compliments should be returned with respect.
I was taught that you are gracious to people who give you compliments. As long as the compliment is honest and appropriate. I think a man complimenting you on your boobs is not appropriate if he does not know you. However, if someone compliments your smile or your hair I still think that they are in titled to respect. I think what Larry Williams was put off by is the reaction. You may not be interested in the person giving the compliment but there is no reason to be rude. Some women are.
Yea I know the feeling; I have some insercuities becuaes well what you said; I don't find myself attractive, I always think of myself as cute or adorable *becaues I been told that by friends and family*. And now I remember all the times, few boys admit they like me. Not being self-centre; its what I remember when I don't think of myself attractive.
Nice response. It'll be interesting to see how the comments in this video develop compared to the comments in mine. I got a feeling that while my comments came from a lot of males who agreed with me, this one will most likely rally a female audience. This should make for a pretty sweet social experiment and some pretty fun debates.
I love listening to you. You tell it like it is. If everyone watched your videos, the world be a whole lot smarter, seriously. I look forward to more of your vids!
THANK YOU! At last someone addresses the fact that just because you're nice it doesn't mean that they should automatically be with you. I've had this problem with guy friends & I've said to them I'm sorry but I just want to be friends & they get shitty with me because I don't want to step it up a notch & kiss or sleep with them, by their definition they should go out with someone they weren't previously attracted to just on the basis of being nice! Yes personality matters but so does attraction!
Like I said in Larry's video, people in general are not "Normal", there is no such thing as normality. Every person is different and they react in different ways.
It's all a matter of individuality. Men, Women, People in general are just naturally odd and hard to figure out.
As for myself, I'm an introvert/Hermit as it is so I just avoid people whenever I can, keeps thing simple and to the point. But what works for me does not work for everyone else.
I think that these "nice guys" believe that physical intimacy is a right that they deserve for being "nice" rather than a privilege to be earned by actually being a nice person who is worthy of being in a relationship, not just acting nice to get laid.
CarFox6 1 week ago
I feel your pain. Getting T-shirts when you're a D cup is a pain. >:(
samaimdeda 3 weeks ago
It's just one great video after another with you. I remember I was being checked out and almost touched by a grown 30 year old man when I was about ten. I was so uncomfortable and horrified, and whenever I tell that to a man, he says "You should be grateful you looked that good!" Sometimes, men need to realize that women's lives don't revolve around the approval of their penis >_>
Everyone in society needs to humble themselves. People need to do what they and mind each other's business.
kipkayify 3 weeks ago
I just have one question, it's been bugging me for a while now: why do USAians call singlets "wife-beaters"? That is SUCH a horrible term for a simple garment of clothing. Eugh!
CalamityM 3 weeks ago
@CalamityM Because the stereotypical redneck white trash mechanic who gets drunk on Pabst Blue Ribbon and beats his wife wears them, so they're called wife-beaters.
CarFox6 1 week ago
@CarFox6 ... Yeeeah. Once again, I'm glad I' don't live in USA. Were I live, office workers wear them under their shirts; it's a white-collar thing, not a 'shitty-excuse-for-a-human-being' thing.
CalamityM 5 days ago
Comment removed
dvid22 3 weeks ago
So true. I like you because you're intelligent, and I think you make really great videos with insightful comments, you argue your opinions well, I like your reviews, and I think you have very interesting ideas. Yes, you have great boobs, and yes, you should own that and not be afraid to wear whatever you want. It's your body and you should do whatever you're comfortable with. Who said you can't be hot and smart? :) Love your videos, don't stop any time soon!
ToyletGnome 4 weeks ago
it's fucked up discussions like these, that makes me feel glad to be a uncaring son of a bitch...fuck it.. people or just looking to other people to fill these psychological oles that they have within them selves...so until people learn how fill those oles them selves, this matter of male and female reaction to compliments will never end.
1232andromeda 1 month ago
Women are not stupid right? Ok now that we've established that dont pretend to be... Women who dress sexually provacative, dress that way to get the attention. The problem with that is those women get attention from unattaractive men aswell, and that's the part they don't like. If a man walks around with pants that show his big cawk he's gonna get alot of attention also, just like a woman who wears something highlighting her breast, butt, or vagina. whens the last time some1 said vagina..
ConciousEcho 1 month ago 2
my friend said: "a dude asking a girl: you should date my friend, he's a nice guy. Is like saying: you should drive this car, it has wheels".
Isaia 1 month ago
I'm applauding you right now.
When I was 14, I stayed a summer in Brazil with a friend's family. If I wore normal clothes (jeans, long-sleeved t-shirt or blouse) and light makeup, I had full-grown, 30 and 40-some year old men whistling and hollering and pestering me. I was horrified!
childofthemoor 1 month ago
Melina should write a book called, "SHE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU."
TomMSTie1138 1 month ago 3
omg i know what you mean! i have big boobs for being only 20 and my dad is always trying to tell me to wear a sweater in the summer time!
MatthewLushSide 1 month ago
reading the comments here just saddens me. seems like most viewers agree with you that all men are horny dogs who only compliment women when they want to sleep with them. i know you're an open-minded person and i assume most of your viewers are the same way, which is why it's upsetting to see all these narrow-minded judgements towards men. after all the disagreements we've had over the past couple of years i've been subbed, this is the first time i've ever lost a little bit of respect for you.
Cuddlebunzzzz 1 month ago
@Cuddlebunzzzz Except, that is not what I said in the least. what I said was, that due to girl having to deal with stares/looks for guys from the time of puberty makes women in general apprehensive about male compliments and (sorry) it means all compliments. It makes us uncomfortable at times. It is not because we think all guys are horn-dogs who can't think with their crotch and from the years you've subed me you'd know that I don't think that. (cont)
MelinaPendulum 1 month ago
@Cuddlebunzzzz 2. However, what you are not getting is that it isn't personal. Both genders (like I said in the video) deal with disenchantment with the opposite due to their experiences. It's not a personal vendetta against you, but you don't understand the female perspective, which is what I'm discussing. Do you know what it's like to be 12-years old and have men old enough to be your grandparents looking down your shirt or trying to feel you up?
MelinaPendulum 1 month ago
@MelinaPendulum i understand why women are generally defensive when men give them compliments. but that doesn't mean it's ok to outright dismiss every single guy who gives you an innocent compliment without giving him time to reveal what his motives are. as i mentioned in another comment, women have been rude to me even when my compliments weren't about their looks. there's no reason to be THAT defensive unless you've been through something really traumatic, and i doubt they all had been.
Cuddlebunzzzz 1 month ago
@Cuddlebunzzzz Except, you don't know. You don't know what the girl has been through or has dealt with to know why she wouldn't be aggressive when it comes to compliments. I would imagine that for her to be that upset about it in the first place indicates that she's had a previous history of that happening. You only see this through the prospective of the guy and think that because you know your compliment is innocent, she does. That she can somehow tell your motives are legit.
MelinaPendulum 1 month ago
@Cuddlebunzzzz You have been on my youtube forever, you've seen the number of comments I get on my breasts when they are shown in a low cut top. You don't think that bothers me? That it doesn't make me apprehensive about the compliments I get on other things? Well it does and yeah to you it might seem silly, but to me, who has to deal with it on a daily basis, it's not. You guys should be as understanding of that, as you expect us to be about not thinking you all are horn-dogs.
MelinaPendulum 1 month ago
@MelinaPendulum like i said, i understand why you and women in general are defensive. but i don't think that justifies being rude to any and every compliment a guy gives you. if it's something stupid like "nice tits lololol" then he deserves to be bitched at. if it's "nice hair; nice shoes; i like that video you made; i like what you said about that one subject," etc, give him time to show if he's sincere or not.
Cuddlebunzzzz 1 month ago
@Cuddlebunzzzz and like I said before, just because you give a woman a compliment does not mean they have to be responsive to you. If they are not responsive to you, then count your losses and move on. I have had bad experiences with men and yet I'm not like "ah fuck all men all they think with is their dicks I hate them blah-blah-blah." I recognize that I probably wasn't their type and they just did not like me. and that's the other thing...they may just not be into you.
MelinaPendulum 1 month ago
@MelinaPendulum i wish that the worst that would happen was that they weren't responsive to me. i'd rather be ignored for complimenting someone than be scolded at for complimenting someone, which is what happened most of the time.
also, i've never complimented a woman that i'm interested in in hopes of gaining her affection. i only compliment people just because i feel like being nice. which is a feeling that i've been getting a lot less lately, but that's another story.
Cuddlebunzzzz 1 month ago
@Cuddlebunzzzz look, in this video all I tried to do was explain the reasons why women are sometimes apprehensive. You don't think that men equally do shitty things that make us wanna be bitter at you? It works both ways, and like I said in the video, you are not entitled to ANYTHING from your compliments, because it is not up to you to decide how they are taken. If I give you a compliment and it comes off the wrong way, you have every right to scold/bitch/etc at me.
MelinaPendulum 1 month ago 3
@Cuddlebunzzzz Are you going to respond to my message, btw?
MelinaPendulum 1 month ago
@MelinaPendulum yes i am and i have, it just takes me a while to put all of my thoughts into words.
Cuddlebunzzzz 1 month ago
@Cuddlebunzzzz You relate to Larry's video because you are also male and have had similar experiences, I'm sure you also relate to the male opinions about girls in his comments because he is male and his points are from the male point of view. However, those ideas are equally as narrow minded, because they are one side of the picture.
MelinaPendulum 1 month ago
@MelinaPendulum how is being upset that most (not all) women i've talked assume i don't respect them and only want them for sex just as narrow-mined as assuming that all guys only compliment women because they want them for sex? i will admit that me refusing to compliment women anymore because of my past experiences is close-minded, but i don't think deciding to not compliment women is on the same level as assuming all guys only make compliments because they're horny bastards.
Cuddlebunzzzz 1 month ago
@Cuddlebunzzzz Except, I never said all men were horny bastards did I? No, I only explained why women are apprehensive about compliments. You are taking this as a personal attack on you. No one is saying you are a horny bastard and you have bad intentions. No, but you can not assume that just because you give a woman a compliment she has to be (1) grateful or (2) responsive. It is her prerogative and if she's being foul, then you move on. Like I said in the video maybe you
MelinaPendulum 1 month ago
@Cuddlebunzzzz are looking at the wrong women. Like I said in the video, if every guy/girl you talk to reacts a certain way and the only common denominator is you, then maybe you are doing something wrong. You are so seeing all these comments/video and using it to somehow validate what you think, when the real problem is like of inter-gender understanding. I didn;t make this video to talk down to men and I don't talk down to them in it. I made it because a lot of you do not
MelinaPendulum 1 month ago
@MelinaPendulum if simply being physically unattractive counts as doing something wrong, then i'm well aware that i'm going about it the wrong way. however, it's still not right to assume that just because an ugly guy compliments you, even on something not related your looks, it means he only wants to have sex with you. i don't get what's wrong or sexual about saying "you made a great point in that discussion in class earlier" or something similar. yet i still get dismissed for saying that.
Cuddlebunzzzz 1 month ago
@Cuddlebunzzzz understand the female point of view, but think that because all of you have similar experiences it validates what you say.
MelinaPendulum 1 month ago
@MelinaPendulum so based on what i've heard from this video and these comments, i've learned that it's never ok to compliment a woman unless it's obvious that she's interested in you, or if she's a good friend. am i correct?
Cuddlebunzzzz 1 month ago
@Cuddlebunzzzz Nope and nope, but I will respond to you in the messages, because I don't want to clog up the comment board, plus I can't get all my thoughts out with these character limits.
MelinaPendulum 1 month ago
there have even been times when i've complimented women on their intelligence and they still thought i was trying to get in their pants. one time after my political science class, i complemented a woman who had said something interesting during the class discussion. all she did was give me a mean look and tell me she had a boyfriend. even after i told her i was just trying to be nice and wasn't expecting anything from her, she just said "whatever" and walked away.
Cuddlebunzzzz 1 month ago
the video you replied to was about non-sexual compliments. he was talking about his experience with women flipping out over him complimenting their shoes or their hair, even though he wasn't expecting anything from it. i can relate to him, and what this video tells me is that women assume any and every compliment from a guy has sexual undertones, even if it's something we would also say to our parents. which is why i just don't compliment women anymore. we're not all horny dogs.
Cuddlebunzzzz 1 month ago
This may or may not go to this vid but when I was in 7th or 8th grade. I was loner I never talked with anybody and all of a sudden there was a rumor going around saying that I gave head to someone. He was older than me and I did not know what that was at the time. He was going off to highschool.
Sangoforever 1 month ago
Great video! My daughter is 12 and she doesn't look 12...it worries my husband and I....
ocdofbooks 1 month ago
This is a good video with a great point. I find the issue that is the largest problem is entitlement. One of my best friends whom i treat as if she is my sister is gorgeous but has to live with that as a dilemma. Virtually every guy she interacts with is trying some way "in" and all she wants to do is hang and play video games. But so many feel that they are entitled to have shots with people and thats just greedy and selfish. First its Oh you're so beautiful, then after rejection its B#$#$
talix 1 month ago
I don't know, maybe it's just me, but when a guy that I don't know gives me a compliment on my looks, it sounds sort of sleazy to me. It always seems kind of underhanded, in a way, and my sister feels this way at times too. Even when the compliment is sweet or at least, above reproach it feels like the guy is trying to get something. But, personally, if someone gives me a compliment, I will acknowledge it, thank them, and move on (so long as the compliment is actually a compliment, obviously.)
CadaverousCadaver 1 month ago
So true... A lot of times wen ppl I don't know really well giv me compliments I usually just say thanks & half the time I'm not even flattered cuz I'm thinking "what the fuck do u want from me? R u like trying to tease me or sumthing? (especially at school cuz I'm a loser to be u
Maikkacrackshiper13 1 month ago
Wise, insightful, (mostly) articulate and well-thought-out as always Melina.
MrInkBlood 1 month ago
Well. Said.
"OMG MALE ATTENTION!" This in particular is so true. There seems to be this assumption in society that women should want to be looked at, and if men deem to grace us with attention that we should be greatful--because, you know, male attention gives women's lives meaning. It's nothing new, either, the "Male Gaze" (i.e. women, but not men, should desire to be looked at by the opposite sex) as a concept has been around for a while.
ShalomDove 1 month ago 12
I agree!!! damn everything you said is true!
simplyamethyst94 1 month ago
3-3:03 YES. Oh my God, yes. I've been making this argument for a whiel and haven't heard other people say it. I'm so sick of "nice guys" who complain about how much of a bitch a girl is because he's nice and she won't date him.
Alimaria 1 month ago
It is my opinion that whatever women wear men will find something sexually attractive about you. Men are really just hardwired to notice these things and some are stupid enough to give rude compliments. It isn't your fault, wear what you feel comfortable wearing. Regardless, women really do need to have self respect and men really do need to have respect for you.
necronomicon009 1 month ago
I'm sorry to play devils advocate but if I gave a compliment to a woman wearing skimpy clothes, She'd respond: "Just because I'm wearing this doesn't mean I'm a whore." Which reminds me of the joke David Chapelle made where he said, "That's correct gentlemen, just because they dress that way doesn't mean they are that way." But that's like me dressing in a cop uniform and a person yelling, "Oh officer, help us!" Just because I dress this way doesn't mean I'm a police officer."
necronomicon009 1 month ago
I love you! ^____^ I wish I had the confidence (?) to rock low cut tops like you, I always feel self conscious about people looking (especially men and their trucks)/the way many of my girlfriends comment negatively on it. It's not my fault I've got a generous pair of boobs. :[ I always feel I have to dress like a nun from the waist up. I'm not saying I dress like one, but, well, I agree with you. :] You make an excellent point with the rest of the video too.
CookieSnack00 1 month ago
This was a pretty good response that's relatable to both sexes, if you're looking for something different besides a guy who's a dog stop looking for them and if you're looking for a girl who's just into thugs stop looking for them. I hate that people expect to find something different but they don't bother to venture.
EsperReview 1 month ago
5:10 - I absolutely love this point. Couldn't have said it better myself. :3
NicoleConor 1 month ago
Compliments should be given sincerely, and without any expectations other than a thank you, or not given at all. Treat women with respect, and as intelligent human beings, who know the difference between a genuine compliment, and a blatant attempt to get laid. Don’t be rude or crude, and you will be fine.
DragonflyNoir10 1 month ago 27
@DragonflyNoir10 if you watched the video she replied to, you'd see that based on his experience, and mine, and many other males, being sincere, respectful, and non-sexual/flirtatious with a woman still pisses them off most of the time. in the video he explains that women flip out over even innocent compliments that we would say to our parents.
Cuddlebunzzzz 1 month ago
@Cuddlebunzzzz You’re right. I should have watched the original video. Having said that, and having watched the original, I still feel compliments should be given sincerely, and without expectations. If you're truly sincere, just giving the compliment should be enough.
I really have no idea why a person would respond to a compliment in such a manner. Except perhaps, to denture any further commutations, which is a rude/childish way of doing it. I don’t condone rudeness at all!
DragonflyNoir10 1 month ago
@DragonflyNoir10 being sincere SHOULD be enough, which is the point Larry was making and that i agree with. the problem is that 9 times out of 10, women don't give us a chance to show if we're really sincere, and dismiss us instantly because they just assume that we only complimented her in an attempt to have sex with her.
Cuddlebunzzzz 1 month ago
@Cuddlebunzzzz I think you’ve missed my point. When I say "should be enough” I mean it should be enough for you. When I give a compliment, my only expectation is a thank you. If a woman is in to you, she will respond in kind, and if she is not…I’m sure she has her reasons. Again, I don’t condone rudeness at all.
DragonflyNoir10 1 month ago
I don't mind getting on or two complements from a guy I don't know, but when they stary to all out flirt, then I tell them to fu*k off.
This is the reason I wear very baggy clothes. I got po'd when I was at an antique shop and the decrepit 90 some year old shop owner followed me around just to see my boobs. And I was only 14!
vulcangrl13 1 month ago
I love your comment about nice guys feeling entitled. I went through that phase for too long and came up with the same conclusion eventually. To be so young you are very wise. Keep up the good work.
jawanza72 1 month ago
I have received compliments from women who I was in no way attracted to and I am always flattered and gracious whether I was interested or not. I do understand that guys can be aggressive and that women have to be defensive at times because of this. I also understand that many women are fatigued by constant attention. However, if the person is polite and respectful their compliments should be returned with respect.
jawanza72 1 month ago
I was taught that you are gracious to people who give you compliments. As long as the compliment is honest and appropriate. I think a man complimenting you on your boobs is not appropriate if he does not know you. However, if someone compliments your smile or your hair I still think that they are in titled to respect. I think what Larry Williams was put off by is the reaction. You may not be interested in the person giving the compliment but there is no reason to be rude. Some women are.
jawanza72 1 month ago
because...it draws the attention. and there are alot of perverts in this world. lol but i agree with wat ur saying about the compliments.
ScarletFierce 1 month ago
Such a smart young lady. I absolutely love your channel and this is going right my fb page.
Nosaltypeanut 1 month ago
very good response
TheJZoneproductions 1 month ago
*bows to you* You are awesome!!
Yea I know the feeling; I have some insercuities becuaes well what you said; I don't find myself attractive, I always think of myself as cute or adorable *becaues I been told that by friends and family*. And now I remember all the times, few boys admit they like me. Not being self-centre; its what I remember when I don't think of myself attractive.
hunnykun101 1 month ago
compliment
loupremo 1 month ago 2
@loupremo sorry, it was the spellcheck that messed that up, I went to bed after uploading it
MelinaPendulum 1 month ago
Nice response. It'll be interesting to see how the comments in this video develop compared to the comments in mine. I got a feeling that while my comments came from a lot of males who agreed with me, this one will most likely rally a female audience. This should make for a pretty sweet social experiment and some pretty fun debates.
OtakuASSEMBLE 1 month ago
Well said. (:
lovestapler 1 month ago
I love listening to you. You tell it like it is. If everyone watched your videos, the world be a whole lot smarter, seriously. I look forward to more of your vids!
caelestis17 1 month ago
Thank you so much for stating (the truth) that this sort of nonsense goes both ways. Both men AND women pull this shit. THANK YOU.
lycanfan 1 month ago
THANK YOU! At last someone addresses the fact that just because you're nice it doesn't mean that they should automatically be with you. I've had this problem with guy friends & I've said to them I'm sorry but I just want to be friends & they get shitty with me because I don't want to step it up a notch & kiss or sleep with them, by their definition they should go out with someone they weren't previously attracted to just on the basis of being nice! Yes personality matters but so does attraction!
PuffyAmiYumi 1 month ago
Like I said in Larry's video, people in general are not "Normal", there is no such thing as normality. Every person is different and they react in different ways.
It's all a matter of individuality. Men, Women, People in general are just naturally odd and hard to figure out.
As for myself, I'm an introvert/Hermit as it is so I just avoid people whenever I can, keeps thing simple and to the point. But what works for me does not work for everyone else.
Zipblockgory 1 month ago
At 4:47 you just said what I have been telling people for years, and it is good to know I'm not the only who thinks this way.
TheImmortalHybrid 1 month ago
help i cant stop watching your videos lol
MultiMrPaTroN 1 month ago