BIBLE GAMES - NES Review by the Angry Video Game Nerd - Cinemassacre.com

[tapperthegoat]

What? This guy is a blatant copy of Irategamer and Gamedude...

[MarkLylass927]

also i am ur girl

[pochopaz7381]

Wow... people cant even let him critize this awful games because they are christian although they were just an excuse for money...

[13biglou1992]

God: "Don't look at me, I didn't have anything to do with those games. I told Wisdom Tree it was a bad idea, but did they listen to me?"

[TamagotchiSuper]

Super 3D fuckfarts ROFL

[sesshamaru023]

Holy shit reading through the comments and seeing one person condeming people to hell already wow oh well its just a review chill out grab something to eat and drink and watch the nerd do what he does best

[valentino1386]

you will soon see hell good luck.and asta la vista

[brekachu12]

Noah is chuck norris' brother........... he taught chuck all he knows.... nuff said

[xMurderxmurderjoey]

super 3D fuck farts

[killer7449]

Player 1: ASSSSSSS

Player 2:Assasin

Player 3:ASSES

Player 4:ASShole

[LuigiFan99]

Lets try flight to Egypt. Its bad

[PerseusLP]

Noah borrowed Chuck Norris' power...

[Inforce1234]

Probably a Stalk carried the baby LOL

[valentino1386]

have some respect for anithing that has to do with god,..dident like this bible game review;;i like all the other game reviews like nn turtles and back to the future. but this one now waayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!­!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[tricksterhuaun]

@valentino1386 You're being ironic, don't you?

[SuperFantasticFox]

@valentino1386 Stop demanding respect for your religion in every conceivable situation. Learn to accept criticism, and you will find that life in the modern world is much easier.

[valentino1386]

@SuperFantasticFox we been acepting critism for thousands of years and tolarance shows how smart you are

[SuperFantasticFox]

@valentino1386 I really feel like converting, after seeing how nice a person you are.

[vampirerisin]

@valentino1386 Its people like you who give religion a bad name and English teachers a migraine. You say you are tolerant yet you are on here condemning people to hell and shit that doesn't seem very tolerant to me. Your just another religious nutcase who doesn't understand what they believe in so grow the fuck up.

[mario8989ify]

@vampirerisin calm down bitch!

[brekachu12]

@valentino1386 He's not criticizing god or the religion he's criticizing the games becuase they' re so bad. GOT IT GET IT GOOD. there I think I've made my point.

[valentino1386]

@brekachu12 i now what you mean those games suck ass.but youre the one missing the point...hell is waiting for you. im proud to be cathlic and proud to play my games thank god for all the good games...still like nes nerds reviews...peace

[MrAvatar4o]

@valentino1386 Not only is it hard as shit to understand what you say, but also if you so much want to hear people saying: "GOD IS THE BEST!" go to church where all stereotypical prayers are...

[valentino1386]

@MrAvatar4o say hello to hell soon..hope not ...good luck to you to

[IwubMaiColettie]

@valentino1386 Live with it, god shouldn't alter your feeling for shit :/

Not to mention the fact that you let god alter your decisions makes you a religious nut.

and religion is pointless anyway.

[valentino1386]

@IwubMaiColettie say hello to the gates of hell its called freedom of speach in your world

[IwubMaiColettie]

@valentino1386 Ahh, the typical bullshit Christian :3

[valentino1386]

@IwubMaiColettie weve been living with it for thousands of years and tolorated to right shows how smart you are to..bum

[IwubMaiColettie]

@valentino1386 I think I lost 5 IQ points from reading that. Before you go around criticizing how smart people are you should learn proper sentence comprehension.

[bloodlustshiva1]

@valentino1386 You know, it's idiots like you that make it hard on the rest of us, who just try to get by in a world that steadily tries to condemn those that believe in something other than this sad and hate filled world. You completely missed the point of the review, and your condemning people to hell (which you have no right to do), and no matter what you were talking about, you still come across as slightly retarded. Do yourself a favor, and don't post anything else. Please.

[metademetra]

Noah's Ark doesn't look that bad. Don't give THAT one crap

[UseryHee]

Super 3D fuck farts

[AverageGameBoy]

Baby Moses

[shoopdawhoop9871]

do jurassic park tresspasser i dare u

[Anosplicer]

irate gamer game lick my fucking ASSSSSSS

[Echolyktuz]

6 years and still kicking...

AAAAAASSSSSSSSSS!

[HackerpcsIII]

Fuck I'M LAUGHING MY ASS OFF at 7:45

HAHAHAHAHAHA

[smoothskin8]

irony of this is that im playing it while watching the video LOL!!!!

[SonicSketcher1997]

bible games is the funniest series ever!!!

[Polardj900CPCP]

I think Noah is a pretty cool guy. eh carries livestock and doesn't afraid of anything. 

[G6Kenny]

Why did the video start at 0:52 when i clicked on it? O.o

[krazyzark]

what did that game even have to do with Jesus and the temple? that could've been a good game. Going around a temple as Jesus violently forcing the bankers and money changers out of the temple. And if you beat it with enough points, you unlock Super Mecha Death Christ 2k

[SuperRookie95]

Look a SNOWMAN! Watch this, im gonna blow his fuckin head off. (BOOM) Yeah that snowmans dead as shit.

[amno96]

6:12 the soldier suicides!!! o.o

[Pasurojiti2358]

"Oh my God, it's talking" Well, at least the board game doesn't do that.

[TehAlphaGamer]

5 Years later and this shit's still priceless! :P

[SolsticeZero]

Why is all this stuff about cartoon censorship showing up on the right?

[Crazelord91]

looks like wario land 3

[piguy314159]

Happy Shut the Fuck Up

[zacklegogamer]

The angry video game nerd should be called The Soldier every time he plays a game with 2 or more animals. UNLESS ITS A FARM!

[tubeaccmhaaa]

babay moses baby moses!

[duvra]

uuugh take that u monkey f***!

[ZWG27]

AVGN > midterms

[vimoss]

AVGN: god, this is annoying!

transcribe audio: (cc) godesses in norway.

[DocRavage]

"That's disgusting; I apologize."

Damn, never thought I'd hear the AVGN say that...

[DracheN0504]

Super 3D Fuckfarts

[apinafilms]

i slaughtered a metal gear today

your argument is invalid

[jared201345]

Player 1: ASSSSSSS

[theUltimateBadass146]

I can so see AVGN visiting a farm and trying to pick up the fucking horses and cows like he's Link- just raising that shit above his head

[supermariofan03]

I'm a christian but this is pretty funny

[bgreen97]

@supermariofan03 You being Christian has nothing to do with your opinion of shitty games

[supermariofan03]

@bgreen97 it does because these are BIBLE games he's reviewing and even though he curses at these BIBLE games it's still a pretty funny review

[willpwn4cash]

@supermariofan03 the games still suck ass. Just because it's about the bible doesn't make it good.

[supermariofan03]

@willpwn4cash I do think the games are bad

[TheGoofyshit]

@supermariofan03

Because you are stupid

[supermariofan03]

@TheGoofyshit how am I stupid?

[IwubMaiColettie]

@supermariofan03 So, being christian doesn't mean anything.

[supermariofan03]

@IwubMaiColettie yeah it does he's cursing at something bible related but I still think it's funny

[gradsssara]

sheepy, sheepy sheepy sheepy

I laughed so hard at that part

[iKaylind]

I'm atheist.

It's pretty fun.

[trollsareforkids]

well technically he would have 7 goats (im jewish trust me on this one)

[trollsareforkids]

though shalt not covet thy neighbors veggies

[sushiking1223]

Here's the reason why there are no succesfull Christian videogame companies.

[Noonecutsthis22]

why do churches have to copy things just to get attention?

can't they just RELY on God, as they say?

[epicpyro100]

press 6



[Ripleydee]

NOAH LOOKS LIKE A DEMON :O

[gontiletti]

dont eat chicken and rice without cooked asian vegies

[WhereIsKyleGass15]

I dropped this game in a game shop today. Guy was PISSED

[Ilovecheese792]

These games should be in Hell no not hell dog Crap

[SternMann93]

I am bible and i find this offensive.

[iamDalunar]

I owned bible adventures when I was a kid. I loved it and got very good at it. I'm never going to play it again though as i'm sure it would be awful and ruin the memories.

[icewhipRox]

I'm a Christan, and I'm offended by how bad these games are! Seriously, do these "game" (or should I say shit) makers want us to be know for this? For being a bunch of lame dipshits?! And what's with all the rip offs? What ever happened to "Thou Shalt not steal"? And doesn't the bible also say to follow the laws of man unless is conflicts with God's higher laws? Yeah, hacking and making unauthorized games without Nintendo's permission was the "Christan" thing to so, all right! I'm disgusted!

[IanDevil15]

I have the black copy of "Bible Adventures". Is very funny to play with friends, but also as bad as it looks here.

[Mortskcab]

Tim Tebow's favorite games......

[gerardz101]

It's even funnier if you imagined Noah's thought being narrated by the Nerd.

Noah : *After hitting the pig with the thing* URNNNGHH, Take that bitch!

[CAZPERsayz]

i just lost it when he said, Noah shoots the food so hard it knocks them out, AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHA imagine thats how he did it

[yingyanggamer]

I wonder if God intended for these games to suck so this video could be created. :)

[superhamzah85]

Why don't they make a Jesus game, with unlimited continues.

[Ladon68]

Man, people still watching this?

[GymMasterAlex]

We getting a remake of Super Noah's Ark 3D for the 3DS?

[megatheheghog]

name: ASSSSSS :3

[AFROJASON666]

Thumbs up if you had the snow button on during this episode.

[scaryguy004]

lion vs lamb is talked about alot in the bible,its a medaphor like "christian vs athiest"

[scaryguy004]

im christian,and im not offended.

[edwinmusic]

I DON'T LIKE BUTTON!!!! 

[MADDOG6400]

"It's the book of Genesis, on SEGA Genesis, and the soundtrack is Genesis."

LMAO!

[ThisShitFuckingShit]

The reason the lion didn't attack was because it was normal, until it took acorns to the knee

[mattakudesu]

its funny how often religion is involved with illegal behavior.

[mattakudesu]

@mattakudesu wait, no its not.

[MrJoeybigz]

"who cares!!!shit faggity shitty nerdy fuckfacey cunty wankery farty poofy cummy gayy'y fuckedy snotty shity assy fuckin vid if ever i saw one..thumbs up if u think im cool..."

[mrdrumsauce]

dude you're fucking hilarious, turn the ratings on and quit being chicken shit... LOL

[JWachiFilms]

did anyone notice 'player 1 asssss'?

[cookechris28]

The only series I'm happy that looks like it's from 2006, yet is being made now.

Wuv you <3 :3

[crazyl69n]

@7:14 "That's disgusting, I apologize." I almost spit my cereal all over my keyboard... hahaha Freakin' love AVGN!

[srnefe]

HEY ASSSSSSSSS!!!! its your turn in bibble buffet

[sheaofleaves124]

Popquiz!!

Name: ASSSSSSSSSS

[lipsinc44]

10:06 Best guess I've ever heard.Better than any speech. :')

[PianoSaraTimBurton]

watching in 2012

[TheNintendoBros12]

LOL at 0:42 It is written with the Italian colors (i'm Italian)

[CodySimpsonlover67]

@TheNintendoBros12 FINALLY! Thank God you said the ITALIAN flag! Thank you! Everyone at my school is like, (mocking), "oh, that's the Mexican flag!" It's so annoying! You're a great person! Thank God for you.

[Violinzak]

best part: 11:50.

[noblesixvideo]

the replay part was AMAZING!!!!

[noblesixvideo]

woah i had bible adventures. found it pretty hard

[TheLuigiBrothers1000]

in super noahs ark 3d hes not only shooting the food so hard into the animals mouth but he druged the food

[Nulono]

So the tree snakes just go extinct then?

[Theunnaturalninja2]

I used to be strong like noah, then i took an arrow to the knee

[ShotanaFilms]

@Theunnaturalninja2 I do not regret shooting that arrow then

[myleskelley]

lol 10:26 asssssss



[MrLunitunz]

A convincing argument for separation of Church and Video Games.

[duckypwns]

@MrLunitunz At least they've realized this with time, but separation of movies and video games is still an issue.

[MrLunitunz]

@duckypwns You mean licensed games or games that have five minutes gameplay for every 20 minute cutscene?

Because the former sucks and should just die, but the latter CAN be good, if done well.

[duckypwns]

@MrLunitunz I originally meant the first but now that I think about it the other one as well. Haha. But yeah it can be done right SOMETIMES.

[MrLunitunz]

@duckypwns Well, Metal Gear is a good example of the latter done right.

[zoomer865]

i love it when the 2 top comments are practically the same

[YouGotWoodRolled]

8:10 - 8:20 That's actually some impressive collision detection for such an awful game.

[frasian001]

if this is the type of games that I have to play if I become a believer then I rather be an atheist

[march12314]

8:16 lol XD

[roadrunner8855]

2:30 TURN ON TRANSCRIBE AUDIO!

[beautifull411]

player 1 Assssssssssssss lol

[organicalistic]

I wish I had internet in 06

[nahor88]

Who the fuck actually bought these games?

[Ryan199403]

@nahor88

I know right...

[666ShahMat666]

huh... at minute 21 the music in the game is greensleeves... song kicks ass

[RobloxIsGames350]

well not for me @masterofre51v2,it took me 3 fucking weeks just to get past the quiz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[donjezza10]

cinemassacre needs to review demonic toys

[iamwillbot]

The thumbnaill made me LOL

[spearofdestinyfanboy]

Hey James,can you review wolfenstein 3d?

[Poiznjaw]

name: Asssssssssssss

[striker1738]

pigs dont have balls. do they?

[RobloxIsGames350]

I have an N64 games like that and its banjo kazooie,it as quizs about the levels of the GAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!­!!!

[masterofre51v2]

@RobloxIsGames350 yeah but that was fun...

[BakaofLulz]

7:23 - 8:23 i always loved hearing him talk about that lion

[ukhistorian]

God isn't pleased with these games.

[GmodCaboose56]

Love the thumbnail on this video.

[xArchD3vil]

Take that you monkey fuck! LOL!!!

[vimoss]

WHY CAN`T I LIKE THIS VIDEO?

[Brachio12898]

The Beginnings of AVGN from 2006..... and there's five million viewers to date.

Awshim.

[spectrobemaster23]

i think he should review the shortest game ever star fox 64

[macrons593]

8:30 :D

[kantezkape49]

I WANT SUPER NOAH's ARK 3d!

[macrons593]

Baby Moses, baby Moses, baby Moses :D

[V3NOIVI1]

Im proud to have the name noah

[Laceychu21]

LOLOLOL xD

[johnnyhardmember1984]

7:07 "-that is, choking on his own puke chunks...that's disgusting, I apoligize."

[wigglesza]

noah's ark reminds me of the meet the soldier trailer for tf 2...HE HERDED ALL THOSE ANIMALS ON THE BOAT, WHERE HE BEAT THE CRAP OUTTA EVERY SINGLE ONE.

[JohnGreasyGamer]

@wigglesza "....and everytime you see two of every animal it's called a zoo! UNLESS IT'S A FARM!" ^^

[GearsofDutyHalo4Dead]

@JohnGreasyGamer MAGGOT!

[darkavanger1308]

penis

[darkavanger1308]

@darkavanger1308 poop

[TheMegaWhat]

Happy shut the fuck up everyone! :)

[Zemium1994]

Merry Christmas :D

[Boogey3452]

You know Cows can only be female. So how the fuck are you supposed to find a male cow? o.O

[Sp4wnm0reOverlords]

@Boogey3452 a bull

[Boogey3452]

@Sp4wnm0reOverlords Yeah, but they're called bulls not cows. And there are also male and female oxen on the checklist.

[ThenThereWasB]

That voice is just CRAZY! XD

[ZeronesXX]

merry christmas AVGN

[theowlsofouterheaven]

Anyone else notice that Super Noah's Ark 3D uses Dark Castle's sound effects?? Well, some anyway.

[weeblrocks0]

10:27 "Player 1 ASSSSSS" :D

[DeckyStrikesBack]

00:11 funniest face ever

[DeckyStrikesBack]

Happy Christmas from Ireland fellow fuckers!

[TheGermanPyro]

It Christmas over here in England. It sucks donkey balls because there's no fucking snow this year.

[scerpalman]

@TheGermanPyro LOL it never snows here mate, why so surprised? Merry chrimbo btw

[GtrSynSoloLessons]

@TheGermanPyro lol, no snow in NY either, suprised me. Merry Christmas from across the world

[TheGermanPyro]

@GtrSynSoloLessons When it doesn't snow it's just so fucking soul destroying i hate it. SNOW GO TO NY AND SNOW AND THE UK YOU FUCKING PILE OF DONKEY ANUS.

[TheSturdge]

@TheGermanPyro Snows overrated anyway :D

Merry Christmas from a fellow Englishman