Best & Worst Pick-Up Lines - College Magazine

[cfthn5647382910]

is it just me, or do i want to have sex with you tonight?

[rpm7381]

whats got 84 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk??? my zipper!!!

[AngeliqueStP]

Nobody does this better than Weird Al:

-I don't have a library card...

But do you mind if I check you out?

-Girl, you smell like Fritos...

That's why I'm giving you this hungry stare

-You must have fallen from heaven...

That would explain how you messed up your face

-I hope I'm not being forward...

But do you mind if I chew on your butt?

:)

[megeles]

I think these guys are missing the point of pick up lines. They aren't actually to get a stranger to go out with you they are what you say to your friend or the person who's already going out with you just to goof around.

[jussjaylonn]

THis woman dumb as hell talkin about "These lines never work".

Only young ppl and college kids use lines like this just to have fun. They're funny!!

[katiillac]

"YES, fuck just..." LOL

[edge2991]

i bet you if Zyzz said that to her she'd drop dead

[Dragonheart7000]

"Let's not turn this rape... into a murder."

[OcularPolitics]

"hmmm... Am I drunk?"

ROFL'ed xD

[TheBoysStuff]

"Are you a chicken Farmer, cos you can sure raise a cock!"

[Nagneto]

All you have to do is blast some Acid Bath on a boombox. The first chick to start rocking out like fucking crazy is your mate.

[LiliFromHali]

I dunno, I think that last one is kinda cute.

[7613josh]

Im training to be an astronaut, my first mission, to explore your anus.

[joddle23]

Jayar's totally right. "aw man, she's such a whore!... yes we had sex" hahaha

[chefawkes]

Rick's bullshittin. ALL guys would smash any hot chick if she givin it up that free.

[chefawkes]

ana's so prudish. 

[cheezbawl2003]

Doug Benson: "Excuse me ma'am, my dick just died... can I bury it in your ass?" lol

[OcularPolitics]

@cheezbawl2003 LOL I love that fucker xD

[morosepoet]

In chemistry class, "Hey girl, I got my ion you."

[3star2nr]

hell no that wouldnt turn me off

[3star2nr]

come on ana i know you want my penis

[tommo1313]

Dudes the point of pickup lines is that they are so stupid that they will hopefully make the girl laugh and break the ice

[kgonepostl]

Jesus: "Yes, FUCK!!!"

LMFAO

[whatisahumans]

Best pick up line a guy can give: I make over $100,000 a year.

Worst pick up line a guy can give: Anything else.

[noldorian86]

hey bitch wait til u see my dick

haaaaaaaaaaah

[Clanki]

Why would I want to go to heaven when my angel is here on earth?

[2009indieboy]

is that a ladder in your tights? or the stair way to heaven

[tookthenight]

That jingle at the end was priceless

[GracieHK]

rick is gay

[takebackkean]

are you from ups? cuz i can tell you wore checking out my package

[YourFavoriteKilljoy]

Hey tyt; Stop Slut Shaming!

[unabomberman]

@YourFavoriteKilljoy

For real.

[360Arshavin]

Do you wanna go halves on a bastard?

[fdub301]

"of course she wants the D" - Ana

[fapplejuice]

shwang wang wang

[FamilyRoyalty]

Hahah.. Ana calls the girl Alejandro in the end. Awesome =D

[flioink]

Pickup lines do not work,if you are out of things to say just go direct,be honest and daring even if not very imaginative .

Million times better than being scheming insecure weirdo using sleazy tactics.

[fiercedragoon1982]

pickup lines = discredited trope

[lisento]

The conversations are priceless.

[CHRISTIANNWO]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

Pedals will shed

And so will your clothes

[vsenderov]

@CHRISTIANNWO is it pedals, or petals??

[rasnac]

What happened at 2:54? Obviously something Ana said was edited out.

[aqibcity]

y m i constantly staring at his nose...its the size of my fist....

[WarwickAllison]

Pick-up lines are forced comedy. All they do is prove the speaker has a weak sense of humour. With a good sense of humour, you don't need "lines", you just slowly ramp up the flirting as the other person responds.

[cgartsenal]

...more bad pickup lines:

-Um, hi, you're so beautiful... can I take you out sometime?.

-Hi, you're very pretty... do you have a boyfriend?

-Hey there, can I get to know you? XD

*yawn* I could go on and on, but I'm too tired. Good luck people. Also, to the men out there, grow some balls and approach women, don't just sit back and wait for the women to approach you, it's never gonna happen... women are evolutionarily designed to let the man lead the interaction, and just respond accordingly.

[FishDontBlinq]

2:11 for cross eyed Ana. Meow!!

[FishDontBlinq]

"If those lines work on a girl then you don't want to have sex with her." - -Ya know can I get a witness!

[FishDontBlinq]

I don't have "pick up lines" I would just say, "Ana, you are the perfect combination of looks and personality, with your "live and let live" mentality. You also would laugh at Cenks stupid jokes which shows you also like to have a good time and have fun.

[Stamps600]

If a girl started a conversation with pick-up line guys would think of it as a joke and not that you are seriously interested in them. A girl would have to start a conversation before using pick-up line. Also if the girl was an 8 to a guy, no guy would turn down the girl, because of a pick up line even if we thought she was a slut. GUYS CAN NEVER USE PICK-UP LINES AND IF YOU DO YOU, WILL NEVER GET LAID.

[WindsurfMaui]

These folks sound like they come from 100 years ago!!! These are young turks???? People should enjoy their bodies when and where they want to calling some one a whore or skank because they are open about their sexual desires is repressive and dumb. I can't believe these young people have this level of inhibition!!

[kenshinbattousai374]

@WindsurfMaui Sir/Ma'am. You are a windsurfing Maui. please go in a corner and windsurf. The grownups are talking right now.

[audadvnc]

Ahright, Ana, enough of the buzzkill already...

[erikbateson]

Do you know how much does a polar bear weighs? Enough to break the ice.

[Scotsman707]

"How do you like your eggs? Poached, scrambled, or fertilized?

[SumFreshDkaf]

@Scotsman707 "How you like yo eggs fried or fertilized?" - Turqoise Jeep

[arobbie1997]

@Scotsman707 flint flossy

:)

[maddiesexyk]

 I still love Rick Strom, I want the D :)

[MrFlyingflipflop]

u know what material this is? *grab ur shirt

Boyfriend material.

[sumrblizrd]

Best one I've ever heard?

"I'd buy you a drink, but I'd be jealous of the straw."

[sluttyfrogmagician]

@AwesomeSauce64 I'd love to prove myself wrong!

[Username14388]

I think Ana is off in this video. She does not have her normal style.

[FoxMedina]

thought she said "lizard" at the end.

[sluttyfrogmagician]

Ana's pick up line is "Hi." because she thinks that being a woman makes her very valuable and desirable, and that that's all she has to do because a guy will take it from there. This suggests to me, like many other things, that Ana is boring in bed. You guys are all so obsessed with her, but I see her as having little or no sexual identity. I don't dislike her and I'd obviously hook up with her, but I don't see why you guys think she is this sexual goddess. Her real asset is her rationality.

[amad0c]

@sluttyfrogmagician she's very attractive, smart and appears to have a nice and honest personality. who doesn't want that kind of woman?

[sluttyfrogmagician]

@amad0c I want all of those things, and will settle for nothing less. But I also want a girl who knows herself sexually. Ana has been far too academically inclined her whole life to ever let her sexual identity be a priority, and this is obviously evident if you watch as many TYT videos as I do. I respect her greatly, and I just wish people could stop focusing on her tits and realize how rare intelligent, rational, free-thinking girls are nowadays. She's not a sex symbol.

[amad0c]

@sluttyfrogmagician honestly i don't see ur prob maybe she's both. why not let ppl share their joy about the looks of a beautiful woman even if shes intelligent?do u agree she does have nice boobs? :). since it's so obvious i don't get why ppl repeat it over and over again but hey this is utube. ok so u want a girl who set her "sexual identity" as a priority. thats good for you but what does it have to do with ana?^^ i love sex too but i personally don't like a woman that focuses on sex so much.

[chillytoes1]

@sluttyfrogmagician and you saw this as your opportunity to totally slam ana. this is ur moment tell everyone that you don't find her attractive. but really, ur just stupid. what her pick up line says about her is that she doesn't have to resort to cheesy lines to tell a guy she is interested. she just has to be herself. so, go suck a lemon and get over urself!!

[sluttyfrogmagician]

@chillytoes1 EVERY SINGLE DAY there are hundreds of comments about Ana's tits and how hot Ana is and people act like she is the best thing to ever happen to men. I don't care to slam Ana at all, as I HIGHLY respect her. I'm only pointing out the contrast that exists between all of these immature perceptions about her and the fact that she seems relatively prudish and sexually uninteresting. People should be more focused on her intelligence and give up on the dream that she's some sex symbol.

[chillytoes1]

@sluttyfrogmagician u make a good point about wanting people to respect her for her intellect, but that isn't what you said. u pretty much put her into the same sexualized garbage that u complain about, u just did it in a reverse manner. i think people do respect her, but also stereotype her b/c she is very attractive, best thing to do is to ignore it, it is what ana does. ie, she only got the job b/c she's pretty, not true, she got it b/c she is smart, fun, and charismatic.

[YoungBrave2006]

Here's my pickup line: Are you from Tennesse? Because you are like a seven; but I still want suck your pussy. See what I did there? the pledge, the turn, and the prestige. All in one shot. Yes, I'm awesome.

[YoungBrave2006]

@YoungBrave2006 It doesn't work every time; but if she doesn't laugh at that, I don't want her.

[TheRealJLP]

I've used the Price Is Right Fail theme a million times this last week and it's on the soundboard?! How did I not know this?!

[Minerva868]

If I were an enzyme I would be DNA helicase so I could unzip your jeans.

[EllahaeMehr]

@Minerva868 *genes

[zabuma]

It's the 21st century, and other guys still use pickup lines? Wow.

[phagtacular]

Actually the umbrella line wouldn't turn me off because it's nasty. It would turn me off because I would then start trying to figure out how my umbrella would help repell the torrent coming from between her legs and why it's getting on her head. I'd start overthinking it and displaying my confusion loudly, she'd get embarassed, and I go home to a bottle of handcream and a fast internet connection.

[LiberalJerseyman]

@phagtacular And then spaghetti would fall out of your pocket

[aaronpolitical]

I use most of these on my wife, or similar ones.

Humor works once you've already been there a few times ;D

[DRock7977]

i love how Ana is lecturing the kid.

[Solidus1086]

Bitches want macho fucks swinging their dicks in their face. No matter what they say about sensitive and caring men they allways go for the asshole in the end.

If you want to score pussy in a club just go up to a chick that is more or less in your league and use the most offensive line you can think of. At least 50% of the time you will be hitting that shit that night. The other 50% is you getting slapped or having to throw down with her boyfriend, but thats just cost of doing business.

[jawayetti]

Nice shoes! Wanna fuck? :)

[tupacthug4life]

So how about I.. take you home and eat your pussy?

[dvsn23]

Rick is a pussy case closed

[caxzrockz]

does this rag smell of chloroform. best one ever 

[Coralvids]

I've used the first one.....

[shaedies]

"20 bucks for picking up a girl with one word and 20 bucks for that word being boner."

[TheBoredProle]

Hey angel, did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because your face is fucked.

[elenavlada]

@TheBoredProle hahah!

[orchoose]

lol first one is originaly gay joke about tattoes on each part of but...or at last it is in cz, and its much more funny:D

[Tetraglot]

Here at UChicago during Orientation Week, we all had to watch a presentation about what constitutes consent for sex. They began by asking us for a pick-up line, and everyone said the same thing:

"I want to be helicase so I can unzip your genes."

[braydenbeautiful]

TYTU's 1 year Anniversary!

[braydenbeautiful]

best pick up line: be funny.

christ. It's not that hard guys, honestly, just convince yourself you're good-looking as you get ready, fake confidence you don't really have and the jokes will follow. Easy squeeze.

[edgarbm95]

2:10

[xxhasudin]

Are you a parking ticket. Cuz you got fine written all over you.

[BrooklynJEW7]

Best pick up line = Hello. Just break the ice and pick your battles.

[slwfreez]

Should I call you beautiful all night or do you have a name?

[slwfreez]

If I told you you had a nice body would you hold it against me?

[redjess1206]

2:10 awesome

[ihategeorgedubyabush]

no pickup lines are good put it that way

[xteric1]

why you back to the old studio?

[xteric1]

do you believe in love at first sight?..or should I walk in again?

[HONORGUARD308]

@xteric1 hahaha LOL

[MrHav1k]

The only thing I don't like is automatically assuming a woman that approaches you is a whore. WE WANT WOMEN TO APPROACH US. It never happens as is, shaming women who actually take the initiative to approach men is counter productive, don't do that shit....

Ladies, approach at will.

[livingeasi]

@MrHav1k

amen to that brother.

[mattofeast]

Model UN pickup lines are the best.

They work, at a model UN

[MrHav1k]

Pick up lines only work if you're attractive...

IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT THE FUCK YOU SAY TO A BITCH IF YOURE GOOD LOOKING.

[MarsManatee]

Here's the difference.

If a guy uses a pickup line, the girl thinks he's a complete weirdo and then doesn't sleep with him.

If a girl uses a pickup line, the guy thinks she's a complete weirdo and then he sleeps with her.

[gulllars]

"If i said you have a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?" (Bellamy Brothers - If I Said You Have A Beautiful Body)

"So... I've noticed you around. I find you very attractive. Would you go to bed with me?" (Touch and Go - Would You Go To Bed With Me)

"I'd like to check you for ticks" (Brad Paisley - Ticks)

"I Wish I Was That Bottle" (random quote i don't remember where i heard)

And a real cheesy one "I love your outfit. It looks good on you. It would look better on my bedroom floor ;)"

[will786]

Ana just saying "Hi", that would have me sold.

[kazooga1234]

i cant reply is there something wrong with the comment section or my youtube thing on my computer

[allshallbelosttoyou]

pause at 2:11. thumbs up if you agree.

[itsazy]

@allshallbelosttoyou HAHA - google 'Justin Hawkins' - spot onto the first google image pic.

[cannonxz]

hey babe, DTF?

[TheTruth006]

"Hey, baby, you like cheese pizza? Now suck my dick."

[SumFreshDkaf]

@TheTruth006 you mean sausage pizza?

[SeriouslyPissedOff]

I bet i could make them work

[BlackFloyd94]

How I get my women: Right mouse click > save.

[cannibalcorpse135]

Jayar gets it.

[kazooga1234]

heres the girl that guys want who say that they just want sex blond hair size 2 size B boobs (just so they arent to perfect) and if you fit that and want a one night stand you got it

[kazooga1234]

if somebody used that i have another peice of meat you would want to eat line on me i would say i would get a fork and knife and cut it up first

[thrashblackdeath666]

@kazooga1234 you would want to eat pieces of penis?

[kazooga1234]

i never heard some of those and i know some pretty fucked up ones and pick up lines never work

[ApeTankProductions]

If I could change the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.



[zeus018]

"I wanted to say a good pick up line , but I took an arrow to the knee.........."

[14koder]

@zeus018 man ur getting me horny

[payasoinfeliz]

alejandra probably goes to sbcc

[Trancelotics]

2:09 Love the face!

[Haradin32]

1. WOW

2. lol

3. stupid...

[GigaBoost]

Nice socks, wanna fuck?

(only works when the girls are wearing shoes without socks)

[thekillerwaldo]

If snowflakes are kisses, then I will send you a blizzard.....of my cum

I'm sorry I had to lmao

[dmcarefuldriver]

Do people still use pickup lines? I thought we determined that they're the cheesiest and most fake things ever a long time ago

[panicatthediscosuck]

The best pick up line is the sound of duct tape being unrolled.

[TheTruth006]

Hey, baby, I got an arrow in my pants just for you.

[panicatthediscosuck]

@TheTruth006

I used to use that pick-up line, then I took an arrow to the knee...

[MrNicMachiavelli]

Well I know what not to say to Ana now, who is hot, but I wouldn't say any of that shit anyway.

[StoneTNo5]

you wanna fuck? <best pickup line ever

[DaBamBamMan]

@StoneTNo5 first thing that popped into my mind. Straight forward and blunt. I give it a 50/50 chance of working. Hell, in my town, its a guaranteed 75% chance to work, maybe more. My city had the most under the age of 15 pregnancies in my entire state. Woot. Dont even need a pick up line for these ladies.

[AlibifortheAfterlife]

@StoneTNo5 Bitch PLEASE.

Roses are red.

Violets are blue.

I like oranges.

Let's fuck!

[mrmista101]

Am i the only

one who noticed this vid is from the old studio

[XxDollarBill]

How about...

Hey have you met my cock....

What bitch you offended... Get back in the fucken kitchen..... HAHAHAHA

[youngbuck189]

Ana is a joke, wannabe feminist tool. "ohhhhh, i get angry over pick up lines" but i dont get angry over mass genocide in Congo caused by corporations I buy my computer and phone off of.

[FlameStreak7]

the concept of "pick-up lines" actually "working" in a way that is something other than hilarious or awkward or just plain STUPID is sooooo... old and nonsensical.

[b4lish]

Maybe she wants ham.

[youngbuck189]

Pick up lines?

Really? Really? Really? Realllllyyyy? Realllllllllyyyyy?

Alright, alright, alright. You want some advice, my sinful ass will give you some. Just say the simple stuff, like what's uo? Or hey my name is ___ I wanted to talk to you all night/day. Or hey how bout these doucebag dudes with their pick up lines???

Trust me, just be honest. It's cliche, but it's the only thing I've ever seen or had experience working. I know your scared and nervous, who gives a shit? We're all nervous.

[prabhatpalpal]

Anna thinking - these guys are pigs...lol

[OutlawLovesNewVegas]

How to pick up any girl:

Drop on the ground like in a fire drill.

Roll towards the girl you like.

Stop under her.

Stare up and tell her to sit on your face.

Nothing can go wrong with that, I can see no way you could fail.

[PSNBloodraid]

@OutlawLovesNewVegas As long as you're not fisting your dickhole.

[ILockItDown]

simple pickups all day

[illusion0delusion]

Only a matter of time before there's "2" views comment or x amount of views or a 1st/2nd blah blah blah.

Anyways, good video! lolled about one minute into it, first pick up line is an immediate vagina repellent.

[alejandroberry17]

Yeah UCSB reppin!