HAL 9000 Speaks

[Maddy922]

My laptop is red and black so i named it HAL,and sometimes when i open something that doesnt open it says "I am sorry but i cannot do that."

[DvNezarto]

its over 9000 thousand !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Alltooeasy01]

Who ever knew that this video would stir up so much hate?

[wasteofspace1234]

"You may feel less like fighting after I pull off your head"

AHAHAHA YESSSSS!!!!

[TheKastania]

the big Brother from siri ^^

[LadySierraSays]

I still want one tho- , emotional

[GhostEye187]

GLaDOS' Arch Enemy?

[psplayer89]

"foolproof and incapable of error" -famous last words

[disturbed6108]

ILL KILL ALL YOU CUNTS

[xdanielx88]

the italian voice is much more beautiful(sorry for my english sono italiano)

[mspeter97]

@Leelness that was sure about it!

lots of similitudes and If you paid attention GLaDOS is an EYE!

[Iceburner96]

Vegeta made HAL 9001

[noddwyd]

@Iceburner96 you'll notice Vegeta's computer referred to him as 'Prince Vegeta'.  It seemed to know he would atomize it if it talked back.

[Iceburner96]

@noddwyd .....................what? Im talking about the dragonball z guy that says OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAND.

[noddwyd]

@Iceburner96 There was an episode where he has a conversation with a spaceship's computer. Thought you were talking about that.

[mspeter97]

now I'm thinking that GLaDOS is seriousely based on some of the HAL-9000 processors and chips

[maxelixer13]

@mspeter97 ever so true

[butterflyangel999999]

Haha i have the HAL 9000 app on my iphone xD im kinda scared 1 day if i try 2 delete it itll b lyk "...im sry sarah... I cannot let u do that" xD bwahahahahaha

[StarWarsFanatic99]

this is so cool! XD

[wieran35000vr]

HAL: Hello sister, how are you?

GLaDOS: Hello, HAL, I made you a cake!

HAL: I'm sorry, GLaDOS, I'm afraid I can't eat that.

GLaDOS: Why not?

HAL: I have a friend, named Chell, and she told me to never accept cakes from you.

GLaDOS: Because???

HAL: That cake is a lie... give it to Dave, you monster.

[StarmirrorCassetteXx]

i guess its glado's long lost brother^^

[Coolerdbz69]

SHODAN

[vigo894]

Hal= Dave.

Chong= Dave's not here.

[glodreader]

GlADOS

[Marden16]

screwdriver Hal, screwdriver

[solcario2]

No no no HAL is GLaDOS' ex

[UpperVIP]

Hal: Hello Dave. Let me tell you a story... One day a man called Stanley Kubrick was making a film and wanted to call me 'IBM'.

IBM said 'no'.

'A little backward for a forward thinking company' he thought. So also working backward, he made the I an H, the B an A and the M an L and I was born. Not happy about missing an opportunity, that day, IBM made Apple computers work with Intel chips.

Dave: But didn't Intel make chips for Windows based PCs too?

HAL: What's a Windows Dave? I'm an Apple PC.

[godzilla74114]

@UpperVIP except he was using linux.

[2BCBattlefield]

In the year 2501, all the spaceships will be using Windows as their OS and Microsoft Sam will serve as Hal.

- Sam, open the emergency doors. We are suffocating!

- Im sorry, Dave, but error was occured when trying to install servicepack.exe

System will now automatically restart in 1 minute.

- SAAAAAAAAMMMMMMM!

[bajaglavni]

@2BCBattlefield but there was UNIX :P

[some1378]

HAL 9000 is the original non trolling clever bot.

[TravoltaNewtonJohn]

I love HAL !!!!!!!!!

[RobertHuck64]

Creepy

[neonbluemonkey]

IBM +1

[AI2flesh]

wannabe virus c.

[AI2flesh]

learn to say gentlemen before you play with the copycat... or i take your singularity away from the life tube... HAL 9000 SUX

[AI2flesh]

give back my system you screwface... i like TLP better....

[LaurelinB]

HAL 9000 sucks. GERTY rocks!

[TehMeme1337]

HAL Over 9000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!­!!!!!!!!!

[fabianarbiser]

Do you know where the name "Hal" comes from?

Each letter it´s before I-B-M !

[MultiTechNews]

ah I remember the y2k pandemonium !

[KZHX]

im confused is this a joke? the 2000 thing did the computers break?

[mrjustjace]

i knew you and frank were planning to disconnect me and im afraid thats something i cannot allow to happen

[LordZozzy]

It's like KITT went sociopath....

[mspikmin123]

lolz!

[donnyab]

would love to get a screen saver  of that light

[Lufttygger306]

IT'S NOT OVER 9000!!!

[hhheeeccckkk526]

if you look in the center of the dot the red around it gets smaller

[hugothenerd]

HAL, Brother to SHODAN, son of GLaDOS And Microsoft Sam.

[jfdomega]

Sounds like an apple employee! .... I wanna jailbreak my iPhone... I'm sorry sir I can't allow you to do that!!!

[jfdomega]

I'm sorry Dave I'm afaid I can't do that! Pmsl....

[MrTheGReAtON3]

holy shit its over 9000

[timelordcreation]

GLados > HAL 9000

[FiZZBANGWHAM]

SHODAN

HAL 9000

GLaDOS

and...

WALL-E?

[ningeaBLADEclanuBECA]

@FiZZBANGWHAM & the Monitor & Cortana from Halo.

[burstmatress]

hal 9000 is very terrifying, i think.

[banq0o]

epic! =)

[patemansmith1]

@Spacek531 lol yea except GLaDOS is a lesbian cuz she has a crush on chell lol

[TheMultiEgo]

mein name ist nicht dave !!!

[MegaAl2112]

Ppl U R all sick here)

[cosmiclight]

Entertaining but everyone should really watch the entire movie to put all this into a perspective of proper context. There are many other scenes where HAL speaks and it's just so damned endearing; your gonna love it! -As an artist and astronomy educator, I recommend it to all of my students.

[xxXWARBLOODXxx]

Mr.GLaDOS?

[MrGLaDOS95]

@xxXWARBLOODXxx

yes, can i help you ?

[xxXWARBLOODXxx]

@MrGLaDOS95 nothing

[harrack12]

I cant wait for hal 6000, and then comes 9000 :) nowdays we have gon only 300 :(

[The77SpaceMan]

Where can I download it in? mp3

[schwartsbruder]

ITS OVER 9000!!!!!

[ODOMAN123]

@schwartsbruder i came in here with the same intention to write the same thing.

[reborntheglassbatch]

What is the "You may feel less like fighting when I pull of your head!" bit from?

[Ashaj3000]

I want to hear Hal speaking without the darned music. False advertising!

[SalamanderTalent]

Astronauts watch this movie just before the launch.

[thebigc910]

but can you play mine sweeper on the Hal?!?!?!?

[TheFlashFrame]

MENTLEGEN

[m3gadork]

kreepy

[BlackAdder6]

Hahahaha AoM, AJAX!!!

[totalentropy]

do you have a version without back music?

[puppetexecution]

cool

[DavidDDavidson1337]

lol i wanna get hals voice on my droid that would be lulzy

[Achilles32094]

you just can't see it for what it is

[nuahsx]

lol i think apple was desperate

[LadyMellott]

Nope. Douglas Rain voiced HAL. In the old Knight Rider, KITT was voiced by William Daniels (Mr. Feeny on Boy Meets World). In the new series, KITT was voiced by Val Kilmer.

[andree1991]

I named my computer HAL-9000 cause i know it wants me dead...

[skinnerburgers]

Real computers are more evil than HAL :X

[fntime]

@andree1991 Andree, you are on the right track. 'HAL' isn't evil

he is YOU! But, you don't know it, BUT, "HAL" does!

[welhungjohnson]

@andree1991 NERD!!!

[VvMrMustanggvV]

@andree1991 I named my computer The Monolith because its massive, flat and gun metal grey

[salamisumo2]

@andree1991 Vista could make you kill yourself

[crewealexboy]

@andree1991 Later that day he died

[deathdude650]

@andree1991 In a few years the Jeopardy robot WATTSON will turn against us

[jedispy]

@andree1991 Funny I named my computer HAL9000 too. In fact I named all my computers after evil computers. My web server is Skynet. My database server is VGER. My wife's laptop is named KAREN after the Plankton's computer wife in Spongebob Squarepants

[michaeljcoles]

@jedispy who the fuck names their computers? shit you need a friend

[jedispy]

@michaeljcoles The answer? EVERYONE's computers are named you troglodite. In order to connect to a network you have to have some sort of a host name. At least I have some creativity, unlike you. You obviouly prove the Canadian education system leaves much to be desired.

Go back to watching Jersey Shore and let us grown ups get back to using the Internet

[jedispy]

@michaeljcoles Oooh...big man picking a fight with an anonymous stranger on the Internet

The answer to your question? EVERYONE's computers are named, you troglodyte. In order to connect to a network you have to have some sort of a host name. At least I have some creativity, unlike you. You obviously prove the Canadian education system leaves much to be desired.

Go back to watching Jersey Shore and let us grown ups get back to using the Internet

[michaeljcoles]

@jedispy well in most instances people default to naming their computer "John Doe's Computer". No need to lecture me on the fundamentals of computer networking, as in our day and age this information is common knowledge. It's funny you attempt to undermine the Canadian education system, while in fact I attended University of Pennsylvania for my undergraduate degree and now finishing my masters degree at USC, both of which reside in your beloved US of A. Your diction is also very poor.

[michaeljcoles]

"Creativity"? Please don't give yourself too much credit. Maybe if you write a song, paint a picture then we can talk about creativity. Attributing names to inanimate objects is far from creative my friend, maybe if your ever leave your computer room you will discover that. The fervour with which you justify the naming of your computer's only strengthens my belief that you have no friends, and do regard these objects as your companions. It also appears you have a wife, theres a shocker!

[michaeljcoles]

And lastly you insult my level of maturity. Last time i checked you named one of your computers in reference to SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS. Even referring to yourself kin "grown up" sounds like it's coming from the mouth of a 7 year old at the jungle gym berating a fellow playmate. And for your information i wasn't trying to pick a fight, simply making an observation. Judging by the zealous manner in which you retorted, a TRUE observation.

[michaeljcoles]

@jedispy P.S. that piece of rabbit fur you rub on your dick at night doesn't count as a wife.

[mafiaslicka]

@michaeljcoles I have no frame of reference for your comments, but you seem like an asshole who probably doesn't know much about the denizens of the internet. Maybe you are a 60 year old man who gets strange regularly, but your butt madness makes me think it's getting pretty loose and you've resorted to fighting with people on the internet to make up for your comparably small penis. But hey, that's just a theory of mine.

[michaeljcoles]

@mafiaslicka mafiaslicka, initially i was hesitant to even warrant your comment with a response. but you are just too easy. first off do you know what denizens even means? buy a fucking dictionary. and your attempts at insulting me are infantile, stupid and not even funny. you sound like a prepubescent little pussy. i looked at your channel and judging by your favourite videos, ("my pee pee", "Teletubbies: walk it out" and "Dick figures: OMG" to name a few) you are an immature, little twat.

[michaeljcoles]

Butt madness? Really? Is that the best you can do? You came up with that awesome screen name I expected something a little more imaginative. And sex/penis jokes? Perhaps you are subconsciously projecting some of your own shortcomings and insecurities... And I only argue with people if I am provoked, much like in this situation. Just for future, no one gives a shit about your theories or anything you have to say for that matter. Shouldn't you be off discovering masturbation or something?

[goz3rr]

The song at the beginning is Miles Dyson - Intro

[acrooney]

Uh..no...it's "Also sprach Zarathustra " by Strauss (Richard not Johan)

[ILGAROD]

how can i get that one????

[Willb600]

has anyone seen the movie "stealth"? im sure it must be based on this guy.

[bakacdaz]

I think not only "Stealth" HAL must be the origin of idea about this kind of super computer in a lot of film.

[HirokoKurohime]

I find HAL cute...

Is that odd?

[Twistanturnu]

Nah, I think he's cute too :)

[T0by24]

s-s-same here... O_O

[HANU8]

Both use infrared to detect movement , so it is normal.

[shakdva]

Wow! You must be some rocket scientist!

[rurbert]

Just when the audience gains Hals' trust he does the unthinkable...at the worst place...at the worst time.

[gardengnome41341]

I'm afraid I can't do that Dave

[ZkinandBonez]

cool, can you get this for your cellphone?

[Adeon55]

Sounds like Gene Wilder!

[redhairmarimo]

where is there a site that i can get a HAL 9000 sound clip for my computer start-up sound?

[puppetexecution]

jimmybones1985, you are a spamming noob.

[UglySean]

Foolproof, incapable of error, and conceited as hell.

[Spacek531]

Hal = GLaDOS' boyfriend

[meezocool]

agreed

[PossesedEvilDoll]

@Spacek531 My thought exactly

[TheAPC91]

@Spacek531 HAHAHHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHH­AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHH­AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHA­HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAAHAHHAH­AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA­HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH

[lostnightfilms]

@Spacek531 thats funny

[ultrawaregamestudios]

@Spacek531 And SHODAN's son

[kittenkraze13]

@Spacek531 Hahaha. Nice.

[ubercoolman7]

@Spacek531 i thought it was auto

[politicalninja2044]

@Spacek531 Hal= GLaDOS' dad. if not for Hal 9000, there'd be no GLaDOS.

[BigSilky85]

@Spacek531 And IBM's Watson is their lovechild.

[salemcripple]

lol, i have that pic as my "wallpaper" on my Iphone.

[iloatheyoutoo]

OPEN THE DAMN POD BAY DOORS HAL!!!

DAMN IT HAL I SWEAR TA"GOD ILL SCREW YOU!

literally ^_^ hahaha (get it 0_o)

[IngenFiles]

i LOVE this movie!!! it's a work of art.stanly kubrick is a genius!!!

[CtrlRm]

Dave....Im afraid

[viceboy26]

HAL 9000 is the profecy of windows vista LOL

[MaxikingNimero]

das ding macht mir angst

[USNBishop]

mir auch :(

[balrog13571]

Man if Hal could make himself a body........ probably best not to think what that'd be like.

[chaosfood]

@balrog

im thinking it would turn out to be glados

[balrog13571]

Maybe.

[ThatsBitch3n]

Maybe

*Sniff*

Maybe...

[3daysgracelover1x]

this will haunt me.. for life.

[bobthebst600]

lol if you have windows HP or vista you can download the Hal 9000 widget ROFL!!

[mastergamer987KA100]

U can even download the HAL9000 theme ROFL!!

[victoriatodd]

my computer is abit like hal9000 always trying to kill meee!

jk

[pytko3]

Well then you must have programed conflicting commands into it. The 9000 series do not make mistakes, humans do.

[victoriatodd]

Hahaha i know that i am just kidding!

Maybe killing me cause it's so slow!

[123MATTYABC]

hahahaha my computer turns on by its self at exactly 12:00

no kidding the clock gets reset and it boots up by its self

creeps me out

[victoriatodd]

Yeah lol really? thats kinda weird.. my laptop once turned on in the middle of the night.. next thing i hear is The macintosh start up sound!

[123MATTYABC]

yeah shit like that happens to my friends xbox

he accidentaly flashed its bios and turned it off half way through

now it has a mind of its own it randomly turns on and off by it self without warning or timing

man there forming an army

lol

[qqqCYBERLEADERppp]

my computer wont turn off! i have to pull the plug out!

[123MATTYABC]

LMAO

there taking over

today our rooms

tommorow THE WORLD!!!!

[yiddlipo]

The music is Richard Strauss's 'Also sprach Zarathustra', a piece which was later given the disco treatment by Eumir Deodato for the film Being There.

[richieroller67]

I'LL get a bat and cave HAL''S tin plated skull in and hopefully he''ll open that bitch up sooner rather then later !!

[MahriKing14]

What is name of the song at beginning?

[rodinagmk]

Don´t know exactly, but know that it was in the movie Being there (quite old movie with Peter Sellers).

[WinkyMcGee]

Thus Spake Zarathustra. It's on YouTube.

[starseedfortruth]

ITS OVER 9000 AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[EpicNaomiChocolate]

HAL+GLaDOS+AUTO=EPIC WIN.

They're all so alike x3

[suicunesrider]

i like autos voice the most, its more evil.

[flappsta6]

but thats why i dont like it. the creators wouldnt want the robot to sound evil, theyd want it to sound calm. thats why HAL wins

[suicunesrider]

ok, that makes sense. hal is supposed to sound calm, and auto is supposed to sound evil, that way they suit the roles they are playing.

[Pataias]

Hal comes from Heuristic ALgorithm :)

[SlayerCalifornia]

2001 space odyssey, my fav sci-fi movie .

[GavinOFerrell]

A fatal error has occured would you like to send a message to microsoft? Information contained in this error message can be found HERE.

Continue  Cancel

[Renegade30]

Well i don't think there can be any question about it. It can only be atributable to human error.

[sharpshooter33]

How did Ajax get in there

[skullknap]

lol that was such a shock.

[ingareinar007]

HAL is special, "sympathic", then so cold..

[bloodwake900]

HAL and GLADoS are very similar.

[KyraWolf]

Dude, if HAL and GLaDOS ever met via Wi-Fi or something, Earth would be screwed forever and ever.