Preposterous TV censorship: Fight a Stranger in the Alps

[SchoolhouseTechno]

Does the wanderer at the end still ask if he has to swear so much? Certainly doesn't make much sense now.

[coffeekoneko]

at 1:19 the neighbor says "I'll kill your fucking car!" Why does he get to say fuck?

[koolakalle]

Immoral

[DigitalManProduction]

12 people found out what happens when you feed a stoner scrambled eggs.

[fluxcapacitor21]

one would think that of all people COMEDY CENTRAL would just show the uncensored big lebowski in their secret stash time slot

[rynox77]

OMG... this almost funnier than the original. Still, censorship is fucking stupid.

[FenderFM212]

this is what happens when you pull a stranger....

[SuperAkebono]

Possible alternatives:

...you forget to take your homework from class

...you drink from the carton and not from the glass

...you don't keep off the grass

...you fail to treat a stranger with class

...you treat a lad like a lass

...you mistake a tuna for a bass

[Phahbyo]

why would they even put this movie on if it has to be censored.

It would be like 6 minutes long.

[Evi1M4chine]

I’m from Germany. Is this the Iranian version, or why the censorship?

[DuridPid]

@Evi1M4chine It's the american version. All that war, still can't handle certain words.

[bobo754]

@Evi1M4chine It was on television, the actual home video version isn't censored.

[metallavery]

lol they mised one F bomb

[VinylCyril]

Look closely at 0:50. The guy doesn't move his lips!

[dykeritz9]

last two words of the clip are "fucking car"!!

[kolebnik]

"I kill your ugly car man"

[metallavery]

@kolebnik or fugly

[TheSuperJabroni]

@logsdonj or dont let the little pencil stonewall ya

[NinjaRunningWild]

He says "*find* a stranger in the alps", not fight.

[Markpink21]

@NinjaRunningWild well....thats like your opinion man.

[NinjaRunningWild]

@Markpink21 I'll find *you* in the alps!

[Markpink21]

@NinjaRunningWild I don't fuckin' care! It don't matter to Jesus. But you're not foolin' me, man. You might fool the fucks in the league office, but you don't fool the Jesus. This bush league psyche-out stuff. Laughable, man... ha ha! I would have fucked you in the ass Saturday. I fuck you in the ass next Wednesday instead. Wooooo! You got a date Wednesday, baby!

[NinjaRunningWild]

@Markpink21 Maybe I'll just find you and throw a ferret in your bathtub. I hear you're into that.

[TheSuperJabroni]

Dam, i wish i had time to fight a stranger in the alps

[ontariobuds]

and then they went to the in&out burger

[deadskinmask213]

At least it kinda fit. I have heard worse like the tv edited Die Hard!

[GratuitousWhimsy]

My friend had only ever seen the censored version on TV, so he thought these were the actual lines.

[imjowsef]

da fuuuuuuuuuuu...............???­

[spencerleeb]

FIND a stranger

[joekoe97]

Seriously did the censor do his as a joke?

[igotthatsnowmayn]

lmfao I think its funny how the censor this but have homosexual shit smeared across the tv channels for little kids to find

[drinktobones]

@igotthatsnowmayn yeah 'cos gay people will corrupt little kids and turn them into homosexuals. just like heterosexuals corrupt gay kids and turn them straight. OH WAIT.

[ryanasaurus0077]

5 people found a stranger in the alps. Another 5 fed a soldier scrambled eggs.

[ZekeMoffat1]

Poor guy just bought that car last week.

[MazdamusPrime]

they forgot to censor the guy breaking the dude's car...

[pinkfloyddwc]

it's insane to try to show this movie on regular tv ... lol :D

[GozerTheGozerian]

The censors were so pre-occupied with John Goodman that they forgot to edit the corvette owner screaming "I'll kill your fucking car!" as he smashes the Dude's ride.

[tigerdude]

@GozerTheGozerian holy shit you're right! AHHHHH HAHAHAHA! CENSORSHIP WIN!

[ThingxHulk]

@GozerTheGozerian

he says "ugly car." listen again.

[GreatUnwashedMass]

Sounds like 'Find a stranger'' to me..

[anycush]

When I fight a stranger in the Alps, I always win. And then I get to ...

Okay, no.

[TheJovan93]

Anyone know what song is at and ?

[oldpossum]

@TheJovan93 Santana, beginnining of "Oye Como Va"

at your age yo ought to know ;-)

[TheJovan93]

@oldpossum Thanks DUDE :)

[bluesuncompanyman]

0:44 did he just say: "This is what happens when you feed a stoner scrambled eggs"?

Cripes, the absurdity of that statement seems funnier than the real line.

[ThePythagoran]

well, we all had a good laugh but let's take this moment to say "fuck you" to the FCC

[rubenshitcock]

he says FIND a stranger in the alps you stupid faggots

[mcstereo]

@rubenshitcock and the award for most unnecessary and unwarranted angry outburst goes to.....Ruben Shitcock!

[MrVulgaris]

I have had it with all these monkey-fighting snakes on this Monday-to-Friday plane

[k0agulated]

Why couldn't they just leave it at "you see what happens?"

[fezmovies]

Is this movie even watchable on TV with all the words that had to be censored?

[Boynky]

For some reason, I now feel it quite unsafe, driving through the Austrian alps with a bag of scrambled eggs.

[stuckonautomatic]

So if I stumble across a stranger in the alps I can expect my neighbors car to be fucked up??

[generalnotsew]

Best part is John Goodman recorded his own dub for this. He asked what he should say. He was told it didn't matter since it wouldn't sync up anyways and that is what he came up with. I think it is funny myself.

[deadskinmask213]

@generalnotsew Thanks for the info I just thought it was someone who sounded like John Goodman.

[arandomperson3]

Damnit Walter just fucks EVERYTHING up!

[ufuckfacesonofabitch]

This is what happens when you fuck a movie in the ass!

[kikomiko1]

I certainly feel like fucking a stranger in the ass after watching this. Fuck you network television.

[allaboutdmagic]

This is pissing over the moment horribly. Hate TV.

[239riders]

its fuck a stranger in the ass

[FungusMossGnosis]

@TitanXXX0 & @239riders

If you're like a child who wanders into the middle of a movie and wants everyone to know what you saw before.

[JOM123456]

So if I find a stranger in Alps he will smash my car with a crowbar?

[RedOctober59]

You can still hear the expensive car owner say "I'll kill your fucking car" if you listen close at 1:18.

[thefriendsociety]

people who censor anything should be killed on spot. they worse then the nazis who murdered.

[Tarayani]

@thefriendsociety xkcd.com/202/

[dhide14]

change your heading...it's "find" a stranger in the Alps...not fight

[mafiaslicka]

i just died a little inside ;_;

[EgagLatsev]

DO you see what happens when fuck a stranger in the ass??? this verson sucks

[TitanXXX0]

suposed to be "fuck a stranger in the ass"

[TitanXXX0]

suposed to be "fuck a strange in the ass"

[pratikh]

Why do they censor stuff like this?

First of all, it just sounds stupid. "Find a stranger in the Alps"? What does that even mean?

Second, the "what about the children" argument is bullshit. I learned how to curse in fourth grade, and that was about 18 years ago. Nowadays, all you need to do is go on Google and you can find anything you want.

[jcoltr451]

FEED A SQUIRREL SCRAMBLED EGGS!!

[Monsterdrumma]

I think it's find a stranger in the alps.

[cbmanley]

This is equally as funny as the original dialogue.

I approve.

[Indiankote]

Scrambled eggs

[DeterminationForever]

This is fucking blasphemy!

[Z0hann]

Na... no ma-...man!

Jeff Bridges and John Goodman are fucking genius.

[luarionte]

I once went to the Alps!

And i "found" a lot of strange girls!

lol

[jdlund]

Why even do this? Just use bleeps or something. 

[DeterminationForever]

this is too much man :'(

[fullclip16117]

OH, NOOOO MAAAAANNNN! lol

[mmasonvw]

FUCK A STRANGER IN THE ASS

[thesir27]

i found a stranger in the alps and that is not what happened

[Masterside]

When you feed us stolen scrambled eggs?

[broncobilly25]

Personally I think the scene is much better and more efective getting Walters anger across in it's dubbed version! Next time I'm in the alps or a stranger asks me for scrambled eggs, I know better.

[sovietsentinel]

@broncobilly25 I agree. In a way it makes the scene that much funnier. Kudos to the censors for making it creative and not just bleeping it!

[MrOiManDudeGuy]

I heard the guy say "kill u fucking car" at the end.

[emayzorz]

@MrOiManDudeGuy

he says I will kill your lousy car, then I will kill your stupid car.

[hygraed]

@emayzorz I think he's saying "ugly car," actually.

[logsdonj]

Lesson learned. Avoid strangers in the Alps. Certainly do not given them scrambled eggs.

[Mattboy2388]

hahha

[jmua04]

Dude's car goes through HELL in this movie. lmao

[LucasMidkiff]

They ruined one of the best lines in the movie.

[mitzle1999]

That is ruining the whole scene of the movie because Walter doesn't seem as such a choleric person as he really is ;)

[Haradin32]

it is FIND a stranger not fight

[chaba07]

scrambled eggs?!

[choloOnEaster10]

i dunno why, but it sounds like he said "find a stranger in the alps" but still, thats just as ridiculous i suppose haha. but this reminds me of the snakes on a plane edit and pulp fiction. as absurd as their censorship is, its still very funny haha

[animechic420]

this is the only movie i can think of where the overdub is hilarious! LOL 

[kingasdo111]

at 1:19 he says "I kill your fucking car" so it's not completely censored

[spankycorkforker]

@kingasdo111 yeah but he says in enraged mexican so its pretty much inoffensive

[davish53]

@kingasdo111 I think they can get away with one f-bomb. At least in movies, they can say it just once to avoid an R-rating.

[90scountry]

on die hard samuel jackson says melon farmer instead of, well you know.

[ZPQM001]

this is seriously the worst censorship in the world i cant believe this is the best they could do

[beepmotherfuckerbeep]

@ZPQM001 The directors of the film actually got John Goodman to overdub this for the TV version. It's actually supposed to be a parody of how ridiculous TV edits are.

[DonbeeFwz]

Jeez, I'm never gonna fight a stranger in the alps or feed a stoner scrambled eggs again.

[MarianoRyu]

Actually the uncensored version says:

This is what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass!

[GODLIKE20000]

aw man these tv edits make me laugh, "feed a stoner scrambled eggs", i mean wtf lol are they even TRYING to do their jobs seriously XD

[mpstlawrence]

Pretty sure the Cohen brothers wrote and recorded this specifically for TV. 

[lionofsparta]

Like Zen Poetry.

[stigler30]

I don't see why people hate this, if you are going to censor something make it creative like this.

[haytxa911]

this is why i fucking hate cable TV

[lilpuppet1992]

hahahaha



[friend2cptsolo]

Find a stanger in the Alps

ABIDE

[malcolmhex]

so that's what happens when you fight a stranger in the alps and feed a horse scrambled eggs.

[Dante1z]

"This is what happens when you feed him over-scrambled eggs!" lol

[fleckx]

but it sounds like they let the guy say 'kill u fucking car' at the end

[BigStick3456]

The Dude: Walter, they pissed on my rug!

Donnie: Yeah Walter, they pissed on the Dudes rug.

Walter: DONNIE, YOU'RE OUT OF YOUR FUCKING ELEMENT!

[VipersHockeyLeftD]

Not as bad as in Up in Smoke where instead of finding space coke, they find space diamonds. THAT was bad!

[scienceguy2406]

WTF!!! I'm done watching movies on TV. They ruin the God damn movies! If you can't play the correct dialogue then DON'T show the movie at all!! I demand a reimbersement from my cable company!

[walzy00]

YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS LARRY!

[MrAlihakan]

that movie is a masterpiece

[ShawnD1]

What did he say about scrambled eggs?

[DictatorRoB]

So when you meet a stranger in the Alps, you will end up smashing cars?

[TomServo200X]

"I'll kill your ugly car! I'll kill your funny car!"

...what?

[rubenshitcock]

clearly "find a stranger in the alps" you dumb faggot nigger.

[Tankerrob]

lmfao....fight a stranger in the alps? Is this The Big Lebowski : Nordic Version?

[maldaror666]

I met a stranger in the Alps, this is exactly what happens, now the scene makes sense.

[MrMas61]

The little pimple is stonewalling me lol

[hisdudeness07]

I was just watching Pulp Fiction on AMC and it got to the part where Vincent accidentally shot Marvin in the face. He was talking to him and the gun goes off and it just fades to black as Vincent says "I just shot Marvin in the face." When it comes back up, they're standing in Jimmy's kitchen covered in blood. I could not stop laughing! It just goes to show that sometimes, such that and this, TV censorship can add comedic value to movies.

[BillORele]

America is so stupid with their censorship.

[Jakeshark]

@BillORele We are so stupid with many things.

[Moonmaster96]

this is what happens when you fefdfghgfdfsdgdfh SCRAMBLED EGGS

[PhatalPhury]

@Moonmaster96 This is what happens when you feed a stoner scrambled eggs.

[raisethealarm7]

find a stranger in the alps. hahaha

[burningled]

It's "Find a stranger in the alps" xD

[seiya1337]

I think they were forced to censor so instead of just bleeping they decided to make fun of the censors.

[roboguy75]

WHAT!?

[fallenone202]

This is why one should NEVER EVER EVER watch a classic film on basic television. They have to sanitize it for your protection. No thanks!

[necrosiscss]

This is what happens when you feed a stranger scrambled eggs!

[comet111]

wow that is really terriable censorship. whats this about scrambled eggs?

[fredjhenzel]

fucking comedy central

[asianmalaysian]

I kill jor ugly car!

[Fosterscloseclan]

lol i thought it was "fuck a stranger in the ass"

[colin749]

it is this is the tv version

[dmuse1981]

scrambled eggs?

[Boynky]

The little pencil is stonewalling Walter.

[evo8herrm]

one of the best movies ever faggot obama bitch.

[meichelea]

he just bought the car last week

[winterarcadia]

Whenever I see this.. I hear "This is what happens when you find a stranger in the alps".. and "This is what happens when you feed his children scrambled eggs"

It doesn't make any more sense than any of the other things people hear.. but it makes me laugh to know that feeding scrambled eggs to the children of people you don't know in the Alps.. naturally results in John Goodman appearing and destroying your neighbor's new car with a crowbar.

[novatrek]

the unedited scene is a million times better. This makes no sense whatsoever.

One of the reasons I no longer watch edited films on television.

[hayd03100130]

so ridiculous. I watched this movie uncensored when I was maybe 7-10 years old?  And I turned out okay..

I also listened to eminem music involving drug use, rape, murder, and gangs. The only thing that came about it? Creating a few rap songs with a childhood friend, and a lil experimentation with weed. I think censorship is ridiculous. Maybe we should go to the root of the problem: shitty parenting. If your parents teach you properly, the big lebowski or any movie wont fuck you up.

[NeilFraudstrong]

What do they say when Walter says, "Shut the fuck up, Donny."?

[hayd03100130]

shun the fox duck, donny

[counterclockwise123]

here is what they actually say: "Fuck. Fuck, fuck. Fuck! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!"

[XtimmthetankX]

i live in America and i agree who the fuck cares?

[mikiroony]

OMG it's the Earthquake wrestler

[kennygross311]

oye como va...

[chemicalpink]

It sounds like "Find" not "Fight"

[Boynky]

If you feed a soldier with scrambled eggs, your car will be destroyed!

[ckyfan8291]

stoner not soldier

[c9chord]

stork not stoner

[ckyfan8291]

where do you get stork?

[c9chord]

stork factory...duh!

[karrasfather]

They should have just muted the cuss words.

[UnitedDiscord]

@karrasfather Or they could've just kept 'em.

[mesmeriffic]

Yeah, because kids aren't aware the actors are cussing.

Censorship is pointless.

[ninja1018]

oh man i can't believe you posted this! cencored shit is sooo funny. i just saw this on tv and the cencores were hilarious. also fargo censored is super funny. "as if we would ever dream of takin' your boushwa money"!

[lithium687]

is this ur hw larry? is this ur hw larry? this is pointless..time for plan b...

[natron557]

I love this!

It sounds like he voiced the censored parts!

And then out comes earthquake to break that sh!t up!

[madoreismormon]

haha he did. thats whats great about the coen brothers- they purposly have outrageous sensoring for the tv

[UltimateVenom]

what was it supposed to say in the scene?

[Urilious]

@UltimateVenom "This is what happens when you f-k a stranger in the ass." many times

[kalle645]

see what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass