Artie Barnes Realizes The Truth About American Humanity

[Rastommy77]

artie. you are a legend!

[artiebarnes]

@Rastommy77 ME????

[Rastommy77]

@artiebarnes no im talking to my penis

[LulzNameIsTaken]

@ atriebarnes

whatever you think, i dont really care. Well, lets wait untill your children use heroin... Ok, i wont wait, because i dont care.

Have a nice life, i hope you are happy.

[artiebarnes]

@LulzNameIsTaken I'm only happy when you're happy, baby....

[LulzNameIsTaken]

A !!!!!FATHER!!!!! WHO IS UPLOADING VIDEOS ON YOUTUBE LIKE " ME ON HEROIN" IS MORE THAN JUST A FAIL! I AM SO SORRY FOR YOUR CHILDREN! WHO CARES WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY! PATHETIC! ASSHOLE! FUCK YOU ALL!

[artiebarnes]

@LulzNameIsTaken Who are the "ALL" we're going to be fucking? And let me clue you into something. I'm probably one of the best fathers of all time. If not one of the most loving, then the most fun to be around also. If you don't think my teenagers, who are straight A students, don't "understand" my quirky humor yet, you would be wrong. Next!

[LulzNameIsTaken]

FAIL

[artiebarnes]

@LulzNameIsTaken Nope, I'm afraid that's a win for me.

[themattster1991]

I can relate to what you are saying. I was shuned by people for being odd or different. Some people are just plain arrogant assholes who want you to be the person with no personality. It is really shown in the corporate world with assholes who think their shit don't stink.

[artiebarnes]

If you have a little bit o' personality, bless the world with it! Use it to your advantage--

[ArchibaldClumpy]

This just might be the best Artie Barnes clip I've seen. I confess I've noticed much of what he's saying here, though I try to find a middle ground between Artie and the droll, boring people he describes. A bit of a quirky edge rounded out by humanity, you know.

Though I'm pretty sure in person Artie's doesn't reach the extremes of some of his characters :).

[artiebarnes]

In person I'm one of the more normal acting people you'd meet.

[ArchibaldClumpy]

But you still wear the eye mask around to parent/teacher conferences, right Artie? :)

[mtfune]

I can relate to what you are saying!!! A lot of really talented folks do not know how to bring there talents into fruition and they go there entire lives living a boring existance. Ain't that just sad???

[dvinedzine]

I can relate, Mr. Barnes. I find people online that I graduated with 30 years ago, and they are so BORING!! All they're interested in are the grandkids. Nice, but what about music, books, art? (No, not your partner Art.)

I'm looking around your room for your Jim and Pam photo, btw, lol!

[artiebarnes]

How'd ya hear about my Jim/Pam photo? Heh... It's safely locked away, out of sight....

[dvinedzine]

Curses! Foiled again!

[JTN1138]

Does that make you better than them?

Perhaps their lives aren't as stimulating as yours. Besides people won't be themselves anyway, they are living an ideal, they believe they want what they have, even if they don't.

[artiebarnes]

One of the philosophies of my life has always been that I'm not better than anyone else! But: I AM better off than many people. That's a big difference. I'm lucky. I was born with a wild personality that I'm able to put into my music and work. It makes me a happy person.

[artiebarnes]

I never claim to be better than anyone else. Better OFF perhaps, but not better.

[runningman220]

wait i guess ive got to understand youve actually got a mental problem. you need help i feel sorry for you.

[JMein13074]

Do you feel as if its so god damn wrong to act human? He's talking about people who insist on putting the 'a' in 'apathetic'. These people (like yourself) are truly the ones who are in dire need of professional help. I admire the man's drive to become animated on a whim. This craziness is the very thing that makes us human.

[runningman220]

yer i know, sorry mate i made that comment one year ago. hes taking the piss out of todays society and its fucking hilarious.

[monnie110]

wow those were some awesome voices and character personalities! :D

[SEEQuine]

OOOMMMMMGGGGGG! If you want, I can call you up and we can talk in scary voices together! I feel your pain!!! SOOOO ALONE!!!!

Spoony

[artiebarnes]

call me and we can talk dirty!!

[YourDarkAccomplice]

lol .. you're so gay, Arnie.

[runningman220]

who the hell do you think you are. i will report you to the police.

[EdwoundWisent]

(^ wellll. here's the deal. i'm a berdache.

(^ i've a child myself and find those who have no loved ones with asperghers to be detrimental to my comfort zone.

(^ that said and diddled: knOWE: eWE're knotalonerr.

(^ USe yOUR eWEs !

spell check any funny spelled words!

sum have subconteXnt!

(^ voobahha yerself. autobahn is cool to watch and listen to but I'm refuse to get strapped in.

(^ say hello to Mr Hanson from someone who once sat next to him during a performance of the yu-uh-uhs.

[themattster1991]

I love you man. I hate the establishment. You hit the nail on the head. They lead boring lives and end up duds. At least you aren't afraid to be yourself. Keep up the good work

[unarmedadrian]

I don't ask people how they are, I ask them when they are finally going to die and them give thema little jig.

[charmingwizkidwizard]

OH MY GOSH! I totally know what you're talking about!!! Sometimes I can't help it, and I make odd faces at people when they're talking to me, and it usually makes them stop talking and stare at me. HA!

[12161euclid]

i just discovered your videos ,artie,and i must say this was the most thought provoking. i have the ability to act wacky,but refrain from doing so in large crowds. from now on my inner nutcase will shine through because no one wants to be a ling!

[Naessly]

Wtf xD you remind me of my math teacher o.o he's crazy...

but hey I don't mind, I'm totally crazy too :3 Crazy people FTW

[Annannas48]

good point

[enkibumbu]

You have a stinky tushy.

[tanrat7]

youre definently a character LOL

[johnroders]

I've been thinking the same thing for years, thanks for using words?

[SebastianG13]

You guys are awesome

[uglyponyy]

youre my hero

[artiebarnes]

And you are MY hero!

[kylemonkey]

i completely follow you! you are me. just like me.

i break out in characters and bounce off the walls and do silly stuff, but no one else will. and for you being the way you are, i wish you were my dad

[boomsstronk]

I WATCHED IT AND THEN I FELT LIKE EATING MY SOCKS?!

Who are you? Stay away from me! It's it's... you...

the voices are telling me to kill you...

[verda77]

Hey Artie! Don't feel so guilty about having a 16-year-old boy's brain trapped in your baby boomer man's body - most adult males have the same problem. Your wide range of talents (acting being one of the better ones) should be being put to further good use for MUCH more other than just writing fantastic music with Mr Mumy. I also agree with you, most ordinary people are boring. I'm not and you're not...Yeah !

[kateam1975]

people have tole me my intire life i was weird

[TNFan32]

This is quite true

[thecyberpunk]

Dude!

[AutisticPersona]

Hey artie you have Glow in the dark M.C. Escher!

[dadoodaidy]

Ponder no more, Artie, because it's definitely a real good thing!

[midhrifs]

I hears ya. I catches your drift. I can sense your stymied mood. You WANT to help these lost souls, but hey - you're confused. You're perplexed. You don't know where to start! Admit it! This is one of those rare times when another chorus of Fish Heads just won't plug the hole.

[AutisticPersona]

I understand it all! Somehow!

[dadoodaidy]

Your hat is cracking me up!

[TheSwillMan]

Are those the B&B tapes on those shelves behind you? And a blacklight on the ceiling?

[artiebarnes]

Yes, Mr. Joey....

[TheSwillMan]

Wow, so this is Studio Spazchow... just a big empty room... with Doors posters and a trippy-looking calendar on the walls...

[TheSwillMan]

What a revelation. True dat, Artie!