Painting a Joke on a Turtle

[gourmander]

Why cant i view any of these videos? is it because Im in Sweden?

[BobDoleNSatanRmyniGz]

Jesus fucking christ.... I like bullshit, but this is probably the most boring thing I've ever attempted to watch...

[chadd990]

Lol... not a funny joke. But he's right, if i seen that written on a turtle, It'd make my day.

[mpapale6]

jesus is real and you are bulshit but i agree with you about peta

[mpapale6]

suck the turtles dick they like it i saw a bitch like you sucking a turtle dick and it appeared to be enjoying it so thats why you have turtles probably gay turtle sucker

[Vynjira]

I was gonna say, Penn what do you care if PETA tells you the paint killed the Turtle?

[naard]

remind me of the time i caught a bunch of flies, painted tiny skulls on their backs and released them at the local park...

[MickeyLWalker]

haha!!!

thats a reeally good one,

yep

[rlrsk8r1]

Stephen Segall IS John Croph, an EPA agent with a vengeance. *Segall snaps someone's knee* "You gotta turtle for me to blow on, uh?"

BLOW...ON...TURTLE...

ratedrintheatresoctobuary7.

[pennsays]

@rlrsk8r1 Ha, nice last line.

[EMDW]

As long as it wasn't lead paint I doubt you did any real trouble.

[ncfwhitetigress]

LMFAO to the power of 10 OMG yessir that is funny. It is funny indeed.

[10Neon]

Painting a turtle's shell is like painting someone's fingernails. There's no way it would be harmful unless the paint was extremely toxic.

[seestickglue232]

Besides, the turtle has to live with that shell for decades. Paint can help cover the cracks and scratches and maybe even make him more confident. lol

[BreathingTheDark]

MAN..... ive gone off subject. haha thats awesome

[AdamUtube2]

the non-existent 3rd one. (sorry, once I start talking, er, TYPING, it's hard to stop) Teachers and all other faculty were scared out of their wits that day. I don't know when they figured out there was no 3rd chicken, or rather 4th chicken. I was hysterical that day but I don't know if others would find the same thing funny. It really was, all thoughts of property damage and time wasted aside, a clever prank, when you think about it, very very clever. Something I could not come up with.

[AdamUtube2]

This does not really pertain to the story but, I heard of a school, here in NY, where they played this senior prank. And, I don't fully recall the prank so I could be making his whole thing up, forgive me, but it's still funny to think about anyways. Getting back on topic,the prank was that they released three chickens into the school. While that was funny enough, they labeled them #1. #2, and #4. So the whole thing was, I imagine, hilarious, people found all three chickens and were looking for

[JakeJax]

I wonder if penn realizes we don't have to edit it to say "we blew the turtle" if he actually says it while describing the idea.

In anycase, I love all the penn says' videos. some are heartfelt, angry, passionate, funny, sad, or uplifting. This one is charming.

[tonzimala]

No soap. Radio!

[youvebeenthunderstru]

Oh god, now there'll be millions of people who saw a turtle with a message like "I'm Turtle #1" and then painting on another turtle "Hi Turtle #1, I'm Turtle #36."

Thanks a lot, Penn. You've ruined the world.

[hinro]

oh man I'm going turtle fishing with some paint now.

[iKinDesigns]

Penn, you laugh like The Joker.

Which is awesome, so don't stop. :)

[Eldritchard]

a turtle in a forest, turtles have flippers, are you sure it wasnt a TORTOISE, in which case the joke wouldnt be funny...................

[bracomadar]

That's a great idea. Next turtle I find is getting The Aristocrats. Do you think roadkill are just animals that were so sick of living as animals that they committed suicide? What really do animals have to look forward to? They will probably die a slow, horrible death at the hands (paws) of some predator, or by some disease, or freeze to death in winter, or starve to death. When you got that facing you, getting smashed by a semi seems like a pretty good way to go.

[bc9021010001]

Yes, money = intelligence.

[undisputedgreatest]

Loser? He could buy like 50 of you. I have heard of him...I've never heard of you. Fuck you.

[themightyboooooooooo]

That's weird becase I once painted a turtle on Penn Jillette...

Wow just realised you last name means tiny jill.

DEJA VU

[totallyradman]

that or shaving cream.

[themightyboooooooooo]

I just pictured that ...(shivver)

[totallyradman]

im not sure what you pictured but if you shivvered it sounds rather disturbing. i was just making the connection between his last name and the brand of shaving cream called gilette

[Americaleb]

That's a great joke.

[ArtThroughtheAges]

Come to think of it, I did see a turtle with something written on its back....I think it was: "IRVING"

(no....not really)

[TheGreatestUtuber]

Holy shit, I live on the border of Freehold. I love when celebrities once roamed the land where I live.

[MoeB250]

You didn't kill the turtle with the paint, but I killed a turtle with a .22 rifle.

[UrinationNation]

I mean fuck PETA but unfortunately as I can already see in the comments below, people are pretty unoriginal and will end up copying this idea, and that annoys the shit out of me. Not only has it been done and thus doing it again is just a hack job, it also just makes me hate people, if that's the kind of shit we need to have fun, well it's no surprise people like Carlos Mencia and Everybody Loves Raymond pollute the airways with bad puns, just bullshit puns ;)

[jeffthefishdotcom]

Penn,

It sounds like you had a box turtle. Box turtles actually do have a home territory, and if you remove them from their home territory, they will spend months and months searching for their home. It's a very heartbreaking idea, but I doubt turtles have emotions like that.

Still, it's a good thing that you did, bringing it back. And I kind of doubt the paint killed it.

Also, you rock.

[apopheniacMCMLXXXIX]

I will do this to the next turtle I see.

[mrplow8]

Painting on turtle shells kills them? Back when I was 13 a friend and I smash a turtle by throwing it at things. I feel bad about it now, but back then we thought it was funny.

[bleunt]

Wow, what ever happened to you as a child?

[harryogre]

My Dear Mr. Jillette, From now on, every time I look at your face I will see a turtle head protruding from your forehead and legs sticking out of the sides of your head.

I know you get paid to do these and will likely never see this comment, but thanks for taking the time to share these little slices of your most interesting life with us.

Penn Jillette for President, 2012.

Penn/Paul-2012

IRVING!

The turtle's name was Irving!

LOL!

[NervousAboutAngels]

oh no! Face turtles!

[imnotjoe]

If you would feel less guilt in harming an invertebrate, I have heard of people doing "snail graffiti". It would be pretty tough to fit a whole joke on a snail though.

[Sintwar]

You animal murdering son of a... :P

I say next time, paint it to look like a ninja, and call it a day... Yup.

[pennsays]

Only if it is a mutant teenager

[analoq]

Now that's a delivery.

[intangable73]

I'm doing it, fuck PETA. You'll find one soon, thank u sir

[VileMike]

The paint you used was wrong. Other than that I see nothing wrong with your story.

[Ljusbringaren]

Oh my lord, someone call PETA!

hahaha

[bc9021010001]

And the elephant said, "No soap, radio."