Is it Okay for Christians to kiss when dating or in courtship

[gmfmusic]

What if i told everybody here that what we call "Fornication" isn't really fornication

[rusdbus]

you spoke some truth sir...however, i think you answered the question, when you said 'it starts with a kiss, then it leads to other things'. I believe thats one of the may problems, it easily leads to immorality. When people want to engage in fornication, it generally starts with kissing... my OPINION is that its not okay at all. When people get married, they say "u may now kiss the bride" meaning that before marriage there shouldnt be any kissing going on..just my personal belief..GREAT VIDEO..

[aaad976]

This depends on individual strengths but I had this situation and prayed about it and God let me know that because others(young christians) look at my life, some things that I can easily control others cant and by following from my example they may fall so it is better that we live knowing that whoever learns from our lives will be well learnt.

[Tips4ChristianDating]

Its great seeing all the various opinions on this topic, please keep them coming

[dedunmoroti]

Well I think its better to stay away as much as possible even though it may not be easy because there's a tendency to want to graduate and eventually it may lead to sexual sin.

[LadyKay9190]

His words on conviction and heeding the Spirit of God were SUPER legit.

[Esmiliaa]

AMEN!!!!!!!!!

[IsKingdomMinded]

(2) However, just because the Bible does not specifically address the issue does not mean God approves of “pre-sexual” activity before marriage. By essence, foreplay is designed to get one ready for sex. Logically then, foreplay should be restricted to married couples. Anything that can be considered foreplay should be avoided until marriage.

[IsKingdomMinded]

Ephesians 5:3 tells us, “But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity...because these are improper for God's holy people.” Anything that even “hints” of sexual immorality is inappropriate for a Christian. The Bible does not give us a list of what qualifies as a “hint” or tell us what physical activities are approved for a couple to engage in before marriage

[jaysicka06]

I was brig courted by a male friend I knew since high school. Our courtship was very "Godly" so I thought. In the beginning we did not kiss we just hugged. Then once we kissed everything went down ward and now we are boy courting. I don't want to kiss again until its very serious

[mellaLee21]

@jaysicka06 I used to think something like that was waaay too 'out there'. To my natural mind it just seemed too restrictive & unnecessary. Now, I can understand when couples make that decision, because we all have a sin nature that is seriously strong.

I lol'ed at him saying "laying on of hands". In my church that usually means praying for people.

[IsKingdomMinded]

(3) If there is any doubt whatsoever whether an activity is right for an unmarried couple, it should be avoided (Romans 14:23). Any and all sexual and pre-sexual activity should be restricted to married couples.

[IsKingdomMinded]

(4) An unmarried couple should avoid any activity that tempts them toward sex, that gives the appearance of immorality, or that could be considered foreplay. Many pastors and Christian counselors strongly advise a couple to not go beyond holding hands, hugging, and light kissing before marriage

[IsKingdomMinded]

(3) If there is any doubt whatsoever whether an activity is right for an unmarried couple, it should be avoided (Romans 14:23). Any and all sexual and pre-sexual activity should be restricted to married couples.

[estar4lyfe]

hmmm This is a Deep Topic....

Personally I and My Man have in a relation for a Year and half...

it has not been easy obey the Holy Spirit, and it was always a struggle, so we decided back then to cut all we used to do etc... (kissing and long tight hugs), but we figured out that by reducing it is NOT Good enuff you need to completely CUT IT OFF!!! it anit easy but trust me you will be better off...

You Just Gotta Close every Door that enemy may try to enter in your relationship.

[TheMistercassidy]

? Did you kiss when you were in courtship?

[ldog2010]

That is the best advice on youtube right now...follow the holy spirit. That is basically the answer to every question about dating...or anything really

[lenoralb]

I can agree with you to a certain extent; however, with you saying there is no clear cut defined answer... you know there is. If God is Love - it is defined. Plus, there is always 1 Corinthians to make it as clear as it can be. Continue to do well. I can appreciate your efforts seeing there are too few people that discuss this subject well. I also have a passion to help and get solid instruction to believers too. I am still doing the research first; nevertheless, I will subscribe to you.

[AmadeusMusatin]

O man, thanks so much about this, its true as you''ve said " if you have the Spirit of G-d and He convicts you in the conscience not to do something, then whatever its contrary would be sinning. As Paul says Romans 14:23..".... for whatever is not from faith is sin."

[Laurenisdorothy]

I come from a very kissy affectionate family so I've grown up pecking my friends and family so this came as a surprise to me. I feel like if you have someone really special and love them they should get something a little more than just a peck like everyone else, but not so far ad to heavy petting and that person should understand your limits.

I really liked that holy spirit = gut feeling idea I'd never been taught that kind of concept but it's really helped me make these type of choices :) th

[Shalyse1]

@Laurenisdorothy

Scripturally speaking, if we are not married to someone, even if they are really special and we love them, we are instructed to treat them as a brother or sister...just something to think about with regards to whether they should get more than just a peck like everyone else.

Also, be careful with the Holy Spirit=gut feeling. The Bible calls our hearts deceitful above all else. If your "gut feeling" doesn't line up with God's Word, it's not the Holy Spirit. Be blessed!

[nicoley4ever]

@ACat216 Good for you! I'm 15 and on the same boat too!:)

[cute251000]

i only do sweet kisses

[AYSynn]

Good point that we can sin to the point that we don't feel that sense of wrongdoing any more! There's this idea out there that we should do what "feels" right, but I think it's a dangerous idea, and a lot of people get hurt because their moral compass is screwed up. I think it's also really true that what could be too much for one person is okay for someone else. If you've already opened yourself up to lust, it's a lot harder to abstain from. Someone with a cleaner mind is safer.

[niquestl99]

I think you are totally right. We should be lead by the Holy Spirit that dwells inside of us in this matter. Good video

[VirtuousTv012]

I think a peck is the limit. Tounge kissing leads to other things. And from my experience. I feel the conviction of the holy spirit when I tounge kiss.

[13SuperKings]

I think you are right about this is a holy spirit issue.

[mininananana]

My view is that you should Kiss

Well I will anyway

I know where Ive been want to go

So things like temptations will not be an issue (the power of prayer)

It might differentiate between born again and virgins,

[ACat216]

I am 15, never dated, never kissed, and sometimes it's hard. I've been asked out before by a guy I really liked, but I had a gut feeling that i shouldn't do it, so I didn't and I know that my husband is out there and I will meet him some day.

[a021692]

@ACat216 Keep it up! I'm 19 and in the same boat (but I'm a guy). Sometimes its hard being this old and not having seriously dated or kissed anyone. Its embarrassing for me at times when some non-christians get ahold of that little piece of information. But keep going strong, it encourages me to keep going as well.

[TubeheadSkinnymike]

And since pt. 1 didn't show up, I basically said that I'm a (proud) 21-year old virgin that has never kissed. But I would REAAALLY like to to see how it feels, and the feelig one gets when being able to share such a moment that no one else will with you. Then I'd be "complete": no marriage, intercourse, kids, etc. In fact, I'd have no problem if God calls me to remain single. But I refuse to leave this Earth without that kiss (in the right context). Feedback please!

[TubeheadSkinnymike]

(Pt. 2) Another reason I'd like to get my "mack" on XD is because time is short and the days are running out. I saw a bit on the Discovery Channel where a woman died and met God and felt love unlike any other emotion she ever felt. But she begged to go back (somehow) because she wanted to have children and would never be able too should she stay with God. So even though she chose a lesser thing, it was a thing that would never ever happen again in the next life. That's how I feel with my kiss.

[toda9008]

@TubeheadSkinnymike im 21 and a virgin 2 and ive never been kissed, ive never held hands and i want 2 so bad i do not want 2 die without experiencing a kiss but i want it to be special and i dont want 2 die a virgin either so hopefully God gives me a long life so that i can get married one day & experience it.

[TubeheadSkinnymike]

Great, I'm laying it all on the table, but feel the need to....

I'm 21 and never dated, never kissed or never been kissed. In fact, I could not ever get gt married if God told me. But what gets me is that I REEEELLY want to kiss but may never get the opportunity, to do a moment so special with someone that no one else in the world would wanna do with you. If I got that...my life would be complete-no intercourse, no marriages, kids, etc.

[skittlesweet94]

Well it all starts the moment the couple look at each other. Each couple should define their own lines that they are not to cross until their wedding night. They are the only ones that can measure their own self control.

I won't make out with a guy. No tongue. Not at this point in my life because I feel that it presents too much temptation. Merely kissing presents none to very little for ME.

[MrWelsluth]

My original response didn't go through but it's not commanded or forbidden in the bible and is therefore an adiophron. If your concience has a problem or if you are worried about temptation then you shouldn't do it and the rest of us should avoid kissing in front of you so we are not a stumbling block but I think it's okay and I don't imagine ever dating somebody that doesn't expect a kiss at some point in courtship.

[MrWelsluth]

It's neither commanded or forbidden in the bible (adiophron). If you feel it's wrong listen to your conscience. Kissing is not a sin in and of itself, but if it leads you to other temptation play it safe. Frankly I think if you want courtship to continue kissing is a good idea. I never even thought it was an issue but apparently some Christians think all physical contact should be off limits.

[zairekrieger]

One time in our church we all took a test on what is our 'love language', so, how we like to express our love towards someone. Turns out my 2 main love languages are 'touch', and quality time. I was asking myself up to now, if you don't kiss someone untill ur wedding day, how will you know if you are sexually attracted to someone. Because we all know, don't lie, for your marriage to succeed, you have to be attracted to each other in that way. But hey, I guess you just have to trust God in that.

[Shaylashay]

I feel like a kiss on the cheek/forehead/back of hand are perfectly fine. A kiss on the lips is truly where temptation begins to sneak in.

[g2a5]

Any insight on whether God will excuse or allow a minister to date and marry an unsaved man?

[Tips4ChristianDating]

@g2a5 scripturally speaking I dont think its possible, especially for a minister of the gospel. How can two walk together except they agree. if you willingly join yourself to an unbeliever you have automatically given the enemy a point of entry into your home. As a minister of the gospel you need someone in your life that is spiritually inclined, someone who can back you up in prayer someone who is sound in the word that can encourage you and life your spirit when your faith is low.

[g2a5]

@Tips4ChristianDating Thank you, I didnt really think so but wanted to ask. I dont know if anyone else has asked but where do you suggest Christians meet other real christians for dating?

[lettie131]

@Tips4ChristianDating Not strictly true. There is a biblical presedent where one prophet was told by God to marry a prostitute. This probably is not the context but it has been known and the original poster, g2a5, would need tobe more specific as to what and why she was asking?

[mininananana]

@g2a5

She should help/ encourage the individual to work towards becoming saved. God will then bless you both

[saleebyman]

altho i like ur vid...i think ur point in sayin the holy spirit convicts on u on wat is right and what is wrong in regard to kissing and stuff...i jus think the devil can disguise himself and influence ppl in such a way to cloud wat is right and wrong for u...in grey areas....anywayz thats my 5 cents...like to think wat others think

[wcshanice]

EXCELLENT VIDEO! EXCELLENT BLESS GOD!

[summerdonna100]

It's hard because I always get that feeling with God not to do it. But then again I wanna show this person I care. Idk what to do. :/

[lovenotrot]

God gave me a conviction to not kiss anyone until my wedding. It's not entirely because of the whole 'it'll lead to more' thing, but also that I don't want emotional baggage dragged into my marriage. I've been single my whole life, and I only want to date the man I'm gonna marry. But on the chance that I do date a guy that I don't end up marrying, I don't want to give that piece of my heart to him.

[pennyjam18]

I think that each person should know what their love language is before getting into a serious relationship that way they would know what they can or cannot do.

[Justasimpleservant]

We can not trust our heart, because its very deceptive (Jeremiah 17:9)! JUST DONT DO IT! Unless your going to get married like an hour later.lol! if you have a long cortship and your doing that it is inevitable that you will progress.i know what im talking about in this subject! If you want to stay pure dont kiss and i would even say avoid holding hands!This is what i was taught about dating very young and when i got engaged i ignored it and it progressed! Even Paul said his flesh was a mess!

[UbergebenSieNie]

Hello, I would like to ask a question, so please don't comment about me being sinful or unclean. I am agnostic so I believe in God, however I would like to know what people find fufilling in strict religous ways. Please don't hate, I only want to hear others opinions.

[Tips4ChristianDating]

@UbergebenSieNie - it has nothing to do with strict religion, its about the culture and way of life of Children of God living on earth. Gods laws protect us from our naturally sinful and destructive nature. We have tried governing ourselves and the result have been war, destruction, hatred, murder, abortions, addictions, sexual transmitted diseases etc. we destroy ourselves and our planet when we refuse to submit to God. God really isnt trying to kill our fun, he is trying to protect us!!

[mininananana]

@Tips4ChristianDating

You said it so well God bless

[app424]

My boyfriend and I have agreed not to kiss. He said he thought we should wait. I respect him and so far we have been dating 7 months and haven't although we want to we respect each other to not. It's great even without it, then again we have both never kissed before so its hard to know what to miss.

[Semechki]

@app424 ur following right way, its just that if you want something deeper, pationate, loyal, etc out of your situation get married and enjoy the whole PAKAGE good luck !!!! *))

[AmyRosario37]

@app424 Are you two still dating? :D God bless you guys...

[123KoolKiddo]

@app424 Woow :). Keep it up! Will pray that you can both keep on at that for as long as you wish to. My friend's was telling me about how her and herself have not kissed...and they have been together for 2 years. So, it's very much doable - just ask for the Holy Spirit's guidance, and for Him to multiply your fruits of the spirit ( especially patience & self control). Stay blessed :D X

[patriciacarrasco]

@app424 wat a beautiful couple u guys are!! please stay that way and dont let others negativity bring u down!!

[rainbow1892]

I feel Kissing is ok as long as both people agree not to take it futher! then that! no sexual touching anything!! like that can lead to sin but I kiss its ok No making out though

[HighwaytoHeavenfan]

@rainbow1892 sexual what touching that does not make it sin it makes it sin when you have sex before marriage but Jesus said i tell you if you look at someone with lust in your heart you have committed adultry.

[Semechki]

@rainbow1892 so like 'play around the fire' thing? No, I know i always got burnt. its shallow

[IamTheoneWhodreams]

I think it has to do with discapline. If your going to kiss your boyfriend or girlfriend, repeat in your mind that you will not have sex with that person. Make your mind up about it. Mainly it depends on how close with God you are. Because through God, you will gain discapline. If don't understand the importance of waiting, that can greatly affect your decisions as well. Also keep in mind that dating isn't about holding hands, and making out. It's about finding out who that person is.

[TheRockstarMentality]

If you waited until marriage and you get married with the man/woman that God gave you and you love each other and you ARE MARRIED, is it a sin to have any other type of sex aside from normal sex? (ex. Oral, Anal, or Different sex positions aside from the man on top of the woman ?)

[patriciacarrasco]

@TheRockstarMentality wow i dont think so!! as long as ur not having threesomes...i personally dont think its a sin...

[rljackson320]

praise God!!!

so i've been courting this guy for about a year...he is such a great person and i care about him A LOT! but it seems like we can never agree on this kissing thing. i just cant do it! i think im strong enough to control myself, but i feel like its not necessary for us to kiss because it could lead to other things that i dont want to happen. i guess i should express that to him more seriously.

thank you for this message! it helped me bunches! :D

[Zapanath]

love always protects, therefore if both people love each other then they will both look for ways to edify and protect each other. if they know kissing is an issue for him/her they will let the other know it is an issue and they will make a commitment to not kiss, also accountability is crucial. Just do what is most beneficial for the other person.

[MissReine90]

I agree, you definitely need to be in line with the Holy Spirit to know what's right for you and what is not. However my own opinion is that kissing (with tongues) is an act of sex; you still become one with that person like you would while having intercourse. However when it comes to pecking (peck on the cheek, forehead, lips-but it can be risky) its an act of affection. The Bible always talks about how people greeted each other with kisses. But if you can't handle it dont do it.

[mstiffrs]

I like how you addressed this topic! Great Job!

[karina21410]

i agree with joshhailesdesign it depends on how much a couple can control themselves. i will admit my boyfriend and i sometimes get into it a little to far but we back off once that happens we both TOGETHER decided not to have sex if and until marriage. i had told him i had taking the promise to stay pure for my husband and he respects that....so i think kissing is okay just b able to control yourself and just like he said listen to the voice inside u if u dont feel 100% comfortable than stop..

[indianshadowrider]

It's funny because just this morning I was talking to my 13 year old daughter about not kissing with boyfriend which she does not have. Knock on wood. and I happen to find this video. keep up the good work.

Christian Biker

[that2001boy]

It is not ok for christians to kiss. Its exactly what u said. If u kissed or whatever in the past you can become numb to the conviction. Or u are used to ignoring it all together. I think even the strongest christian can fall. So don't tempt yourself. Its bad. All bad. I learned this from years of reading and personal experience. I'm even scared of holding hands. Any toughing can lead wrong when u dating someone. Period

[joshhailesdesign]

@that2001boy I'm sorry I simply don't believe that. 'It's bad, all bad'. That is completely wrong thinking. Sex, and everything included in it, is an amazing gift from God, in the right context.

Me and my girlfriend do kiss, but we both have the self control to not let it go any further. Many people don't have that, and so shouldn't go anywhere near it. But for us, it's perfectly ok and we can stop ourselves without it being an issue.

[irishflutist17]

@joshhailesdesign My boyfriend and I are the same way- to be honest, we discussed our views and morals on waiting until marriage and such before we even became interested in one another. We were "brother and sister in Christ" before as well, and it made a strong foundation. We also communicated with each other to always let the other know if anything is done, even accidentally, that leads to any temptation. It's a matter of setting proper boundaries, trust, and praying to God about it! :)

[Mrhandsomeonbass]

I think it"s your mind set YES Kissing can lead to danger zone. So with that beig said if your not all the way grown enuff and cant control your mind set in kissing then you should not kiss at all....There is no sin in Kissing but Kissing can lead to sin...God bless you and keep it Holy

[Avalita07]

@Mrhandsomeonbass true

[HighwaytoHeavenfan]

@Mrhandsomeonbass your opinion thanks for sharing. and your own experience you cant speak for everyone else how you feel about that if God said its not a sin its not a sin simple as that. Not everyone who kisses someone wants to lay with thme and if they do thats there buisness who are you to judge them?

[Semechki]

@Mrhandsomeonbass yes! also, so it's OK to take the relationship that deep into your heart with many ppl before staying w/one? I mean its all about EXPERIENCING things and you will be remembering them all your life maybe though u live with one! No?

[HowToGetFreebies]

I wish people would stop using that slippery slope argument for this issue. I can control myself. A kiss is not going to lead to anything for me. Just because you have no self control doesn't mean I don't.

Another thing that annoys me is when guys don't believe me when I say I'm not going to have sex with them. They don't think I'll be disciplined enough to control myself so once they realize I'm serious, they get all upset!

[MsHighercalling]

thanx : its really good and your soo right :

[ikeashiasanders29]

I went out with a friend that was into me to the movies and he wanted to kiss me at the movies, but I did not kiss him.I did not feel it was needed and I sort of felt pressured like ok so what Is that about you know I dont know........I did not kiss him though

[nadohawk]

You have great charisma. Great to see those that are bold by His Spirit.

[WickyGirl]

Im am so glad that there are still real christians around who actually doing the word, then only reading it;).

[14StamperA]

Personally, I gave up dating for a very, very long time. It wasn't so easy at first but now, I'm glad I'm doing it.(:

[14StamperA]

Personally, I gave up dating for a very, very long time. It wasn't so easy at first but now, I'm glad i'm doing it.(:

[matilda921]

You'r awesome, im so lucky to have a wonderful boyfriend who is right with me before God and the direction of our relationship but thanks so much, its great to have a person like you talking about these issues. For me and my boyfriend we do kiss but have made sure to know ourselfs and know when to stop. For us at first it was the support of friends and family that got us to such a strong position and i thank God for them and their support in helping us see Gods direction for us. thanks again!

[DLK0383]

this issue leaves most of us in the gray area. i think its about having moderation, but there were some ppl that have said no to kissing, hand holding, any kind of physical contact to avoid getting into the sex before marriage.

[Tips4ChristianDating]

Thank you Skalofong. I am glad the website has really helped you. I would really appreciate it if you could help me spread the website by telling others about it. God bless

[skalofong]

I would like to spread your website sir because i find it helping... i like the way you respond on this topic... Certainly we must find the Holy Spirit first in entering a relationship...

[ab706]

like this post Paul....Cweeeel. Well Done!!!!