Bullet Express Infomercial Highlights

[UnfortunatePictures]

I would hate to be related to these people!!! "Can I have a sandwich?" "Watch this...in just 15 seconds I can butter the bread, slice the ham and put it in!"

[theamazingempiricist]

Yeah, I'm pretty sure that if you put pepperoni into a food processor, it wouldn't come out all perfect and shit.

[bravelesszombie8]

Imagine having to rehearse this shit....

[sallygoroundtheroses]

5:56...Granny drinks out of a cup like my 4-year old nephew

[chachihatesjoanie]

Three thoughts: 0:45-nice view of Mimi's pumpkins (but has she aged like shit over the past 5-6 years or what?), old lady is annoying beyond belief, and put glasses on big fat guy and you have 300 pound George Costanza.

[siumaihargow]

1:51 those are CLEARLY not fresh made nachos. if they were the cheese would be stringy, not the way it's shown. at least MAKE it look as it's claimed

[siumaihargow]

I LOVE reading the comments on informercial videos

[ladycplum]

Nice stereotypical jolly fat guy!

[BehindFor17Hours]

How long does it take for you to make cheesecake?

"To make cheesecake I need my big stand mixer"

Totally non-responsive to the question

[xBloddyNotex]

Im watching this just for the food.

[Foxtrot323]

daaaaaammmmnnnn i wanna screw mimi...

[smittycent7]

I betcha mick just fuckin rails the shit out of mimi every time before guests come over. thats why theres no fuckin food granny you old scunt piece of shit

[VirtuaNick]

POWERTHIRST - CELERY, BLACKBERRIES, AND BEETROOT. NO ADDED PRESERVATIVES. FEED TO YOUR GRANDMOTHER.

[VirtuaNick]

Thats right. Pick on Ralph.

[VirtuaNick]

WTF WHY IS A MAN COOKING WHEN THERE'S A WOMAN STANDING RIGHT NEXT TO YOU????

[RedDaVincy]

THEY PROBABLY JUST GOT OUT OF BED

[fran9860]

i want a threesome with granny and hazel.

[infernocanuck]

2:27 Get with the food! (The fat bastard says while stuffing his face with stolen nachos)

[on2wheelz28]

Shred Granny and then throw in the oven - Grubs up Ralphy boy!

[1veritas4]

why couldn't these people have retained some dignity and worked in the porn industry instead

[fullbag50]

'They probably both just got outta bed' - ' That's right granny. I have been riding Mic's banger's n' mash straight since Martha Strewart: Living went off four hours ago.'

[lancasterjr]

YES, SOMEONE UPLOADED THIS. I stayed home from school sick one day and this commercial played around 30 times, Ive wanted to see it again ever since, thank you.

[Staria6x111]

I just saw this infomercial in spanish. Granny's spanish dub is so freakin horrible :(

[fivebearrugs]

Gee Mick and Mimi, don't you like using the Red Devil Grill anymore? :)

[barrydarkins]

check Mick's French pronunciation....Potatoes or Grotton (potatoes au gratin)! Fucking buffoon ha ha

[Katakuna51]

Those 2 are like: "Oh, are you hungry? Wanna eat? Well, fuck you! You gotta see our over-rated device first!"

[fran9860]

I WANT TO EAT GRANNY'S PUSSY; THEN I WANT TO FUCK THAT JEW BERMAN UP HIS ASS!

[maxboye1122]

@fran9860 hahahahahaha...while throwing the apple pie at the fat guy

[TheGamerLand]

lol have you ever tasted meatloaf?

[packeng2000]

I own one. It's a pice of shit. Enough said.!

[sqekcx]

so much food is wasted in these infomercials it's sad

[zagabel]

martha's a witch.



[Deathkninja]

5:54 omg what a tank.

[midianholic]

I'd do Granny up the bum.

[jeffrey44]

3:20 - "You are never limited to the size of the container you're using like you are with those old fashion processors".

In the UK, on Thane Direct this line is edited to just say "You are never limited to the size of the container you're using".

More interesting facts, coming soon.

[theinoccent1]

why is there always an old grumpy lady in food infomercials, and did you notice that they love burning old people, 2:58 and 4:59.

[GI0VANITA]

It's funny how hte bullet express FAILS TO COUNT the4 time it takes to peel the vegetables and cut them in small squares son it can fit in the opening so it can "slice it in 45 seconds"...hahhaha..hhahaa... what a scam!

[Mau506]

1:39 1:43

Not sure if you noticed, but Mimi shredded the cheese and sliced the pepperoni WITHOUT CHANGING THE BLADES! That may take more time than they say.

[EASYTIGER10]

This infomercial was cheesier than the nachos

[DarkMario2]

How about a nice pepperoni explosion on your tomato-cheese volcano?

[VenusInFurs]

Ralph is the poor man's Berman.

[vaalogaan]

granys jst uttering the memorized dialogues!!!!!!!!!!

[queenjade09]

OMG THIS IS SO FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D

[bigvern1975]

Fucking shower of cunts!!!!

[JOSSRYAN999]

I bet that thing is a bastard to clean.

And hae you actually seen the price of that thing? Its £110! Who the hell would buy one of those things for that price?

Aunt Martha got put in her fucking place with those potatoes.

[cjcapta]

5:58 Did they show them washing the ingredients in the full version? If not. then it appears to be faster than it really takes.

[cjcapta]

4:03 That's a little unfair, that's not Ralph's kitchen and he seems to be the kind of person that has trouble finding things.

[VenusInFurs]

@cjcapta Ralph seems to be able to find food ok.

[cjcapta]

1:30 that woman doesn't get out much.

[braitnicho]

Mick used to live around my way and if he gets a woman like Mimi then I'm off to the states to get a Mimi. Very tasty.

[zaoregel1]

granny's problem is that she hasn't gotten her pipes cleaned for sometime....if you know what i mean ;)

[wohlgemuth06]

This video has changed mine and clearly Martha's life.

[on2wheelz28]

"Meat without potatos"?! Some countries would stone you for that!

[on2wheelz28]

Supreme nachos? (1:09) Puke more like!

[mbaileybroadway]

is this a commercial for the Magic Bullet or a bunch of American stereotypes?

[robertperishing3]

I would fuck that bitch in the red dress like a child at neverland ranch!!!!!!!!!!!!

[stabbeyroad]

@robertperishing3 ew you screw kids

[Tyannalyn]

wow, horrible acting

[MyOnlyLoveMusic]

whoo uploads this shit....

[CrazedPeeling]

are they swingers?

[xMarkerz]

Does the bullet express come with an extra person to help hold the bowl?

[iberia77]

Mick put a whole lot of weight on too....

[iberia77]

I'd chuck the two old bitches right out of my house.....

[Kari166]

Pause at 4:43, look at Mick! XD

[TOSportsFan1990]

That meatloaf looks like a pile of shit

[jslbrt]

Where is Berman the alcoholic and his sexually frustrated, bitch of a wife?

[rockstarmelb]

best acting ever

[Grayfog]

Holy fuck look at all that goddamn cheese.

[bffalcon]

Such amazing acting...

[TheBirdGoesTweet]

Sure, have us over for a nice family meal and there's no food in sight. They probably just got out of bed!

[Mau506]

That must be the fakest apple pie I've ever seen, you need to cut holes on the top or the apples won't cook inside.

[eunicorn1]

@Mau506 actually, the holes on top are so the heat in the inside can escape.

[fivebearrugs]

@Mau506 LOL, that's why I love infomercials; you have experts finding all the mistakes in them :) Now, I for one, have never made a homemade apple pie before so that piece of info was new to me...and interesting too :)

[amine9876]

yo the red head chick is FUCKIN hot!!!

And that ralph is such a fat ass... he took the whole nacho plate...

and that dude in the blue dress is fuckin annoying... fuck i hate those people! except the redhead...

And can someone tell me if u ever bought that thing? seems like its gonna break at any second... and that fuckin granny is so grumpy shes the kind of women that had such a crappy life she just needs to die...

[ilovethebeatles1212]

@amine9876 what about the grandma in the purple. what did you think of her?

[nao1163]

the salad is cracking me up, the tomatos are just like bleeeeeh and did u notice how they cut the video after the bullet delivered grossly the peperoni on the pizza and the nxt second its all perfect and nice lolll

[weyrauch]

Eh...this is definitely weird : at 3:18, the blonde puts in GREEN LETTUCE (or whatever) and at 3:21 RED CABBAGE comes out?! At 5:55, the old witch sipping this red sludge looks like an insane gray-haired vampire drinking blood, and is it a conincidence that this baldy guy named Ralph looks somewhat similar to Berman? And where is Hazel chomping on her unlit ciggy? And, primarily, where the hell do they find such BAD "actors" and what moron writes their lines? Scully, Mulder - find it out. *g*

[nuuggy]

why didn't they fucking cook the food before the ppl arrived..gosh talking about rude and bragging lol.....and what happens if a person lives by themselves? who's going to be turning that plate for them?...yea ever thought of that?? cuz i think it would be difficult trying to put the food in the maching and turning the plate at the same time

[Staria6x111]

@nuuggy I thought the exact same thing when I saw the infomercial. It doesn't seem as easy as they try to make it look.

[MsTexan666]

What Kinda Fucking Pizza Is That??

[Tralalere]

If they show me this «gourmet chopped salad» one more time, I swear I'm gonna puke.

[teamgod]

I like how the two old broads are the biggest bunch of cunts to ever grace that kitchen. You know what else bugs me? The way Mick says 'nachos'. Like, fuck you dude - you're no Billy Mays and you never will be.

[jldkrank]

at 2:36, that thing just defied the laws of space and time.

[Kari166]

@jldkrank, HUH? o__O

[greenpepper96]

Ralph dont complain you need the exercise

[zeldafreak701]

Damn Mimi's gained some weight. Probably all that fast prepared food she's eaten.

[fonyx]

has it ever been proven that a product will sell better if it seems to be filmed inside someones house with real amazed people etc? i mean this is terrible, look at the door and the window on the left, its an obvious fucken set with terrible actors, and that alone will make me never buy this chinese made trash

[fivebearrugs]

@fonyx Look for the Turbo Cooker informercial on YouTube; in that one, the stove (burners and all) are right next to the window and curtains!

[y3nd0]

They always clean up after chopping things up. All that cheese falls everywhere and the pepperoni spins off the plate, then boom, it's gone.

[jfrey1]

5:11 smallest bite of meat loaf EVER

[TheChaoticGood]

They COULD have made all the food before they got here. But NO, they had to show how god-like this thing is.

[TheBill35]

I just saw this on GSN on Sunday morning. How come there's one British guy in the entire family?

[onyxsplash]

Cheese cake takes like, four hours until you can eat it from the time you start making it. This is propaganda.

[AznLiishii123]

they get out the other stuff fast but they cant even get a cutting board and a kniifee

[seroyer2]

granny false teeth!!! WOW. do these people own a vegetable factory or something. they used as many fruits and vegetable that I eat in a year.

[naes686]

the fat guy says he wants food when hes already eating

[cayloh]

Why didn't you tell me healthy taste so good?

[PiranhaJaw22]

Tina was quite hot. Too bad they got rid of her.

[crazyrabbits]

I take no pleasure in saying this, but it has to be said: "Granny" is a giant, miserable cunt.

[mrjoegrennon]

@crazyrabbits YEAH! What is Granny's problem?!?! Maybe she has diabetes.

[torresongs2]

@crazyrabbits "YOU PROBABLY JUST GOT OUTTA BED!" Jealous much, Gran? Sorry nobody wants to bang your dusty old muffin anymore! LOL!

[StarCreme]

poor auntie...

she's been replaced by a machine.

[alexgao814]

by a little he puts like a handfull lol

[martinlink007]

Just saw this on TV, some of the WORST acting I've ever seen. Gah, need to get it out of my head now.

[alexgao814]

is it just me or mick is the only one in the family with the accent must be from mimi's side of the family

[Snowblak]

Aunt "Something stinks" Martha is my favorite. Haha

[morechicharonesforme]

What the fuck happened to Mimi? She used to be hot.

[PhatH0tG33k]

This infomerciall has the worst actors ever.

[SonyBoy4]

i wanna fuck mimis ( . Y . )

[justmexxx1000]

0-0

[Paperbagman555]

Lmao what a dick grandmother! YOU INVITE US OVER AND THERES NO FOOD =O. Lolz at the typical fat guy hogging everything, this is the funniest infomercial but such bad acting as well!!!!!!

[DudeThatsSic]

pause at around 3:40

[DudeThatsSic]

Holy shit cleaveage :47

[DudeThatsSic]

The whole group is a pack of nutballs but the granny is fucking so sad its funny

[popiBROS1]

NOT-CHOS

[MasaBoyZ]

So much mess!!!

[Britrules10000]

I like how they keep making fun of poor Ralph, he's the only fat guy on the show so he's a target.

[SourExplosion]

You need two people to use this damn thing.

[nao1163]

@SourExplosion LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOO

[peeweecee]

Has anyone ever seen worse acting?

[db120176]

What a pack of pricks their "family" are

[crisspanda]

1:42 ive always wanted a pepperoni cannon

[nergregga]

I always wanted a kitchen machine capable of projectile vomiting

[baconhead2008]

Hold it on the cheese. They put so much cheese and chicken on those nachos that it looks it more like a salad.

[lebsystah]

are there different levels of speed and can u leave it for an hour on low speed? or do u have to keep ur finger on the button until done?!

[BenDoverstewPitt]

Does it work.

[fairyxlights]

they tried to make the x look all cool but it just looks like a swastika.

[scooterinnc84]

When I was watching this infomercial at like 2:00 earlier this morning, I was like damn, I want some nachos now cuz that plate looks good.

[kamekakarrot]

yeah i totally know what you mean.

I came up with a dub for this after i watched it so many times

[MrHardass44]

the shittiest acting ever. sweet fucking machine though

[richtea87]

5:00 the fake laugh nearly killed me XD XD XD

[VinAl20]

Oh Ralphie you big jokester you!

[tnglo]

this is on my tv RIGHT NOW. EPIC NACHOOOOSSSS

[MITCHELLISKOOL]

crap dont buy

[MITCHELLISKOOL]

i rushed and bought this day 2 it wouldnt chew a tiny piece of cheese everything was different sizes garbage now im stuck paying the 29.99 shipping and handling im looking at the boxed food chewer now DO NOT BUY THIS i hATE this video now

[hampsteadschoolsucks]

the wife has pretty nice boobs for a old lady

[Kazutoification]

Wow, the pepperoni was so off. Did you see how much came out at first, but the result was, like, a third of that amount?

[Paperbagman555]

LOL I love this informercial! ''It took me hours to make a cheese cake =o'' it seems like cool to buy but a bit over priced lol

[AGrasshopperKing]

I love that Ralph is just in the corner munching on the  nachos...you know...cause obviously since he's overweight he's in a different world when he has food in his hands...

how terrifying is the Grandma trying to swallow that juice?

[DatbeRight]

I don't like the way this Australian asshole smarts off to grandma. We should applaud Grandma and others like her who still prepare food by hand, even using a handmixer.

[Paperbagman555]

He's British.

[KittyKax]

How are they supposed to eat that salad if the lettuce is all shredded up??

[TOSportsFan1990]

The fat guy reminds me of George Costanza

[UTAOUB]

@TOSportsFan1990 From "Seinfield"? Reminds me of him, too! (Mr. Constanza is a HUGE Star Trek Classic fan, btw!)

[barkleysound]

LOL @ the grandma

[NJREB1863]

Mimi is hot!

[DarealLocboy187]

yeah Mimi is sexy and they need to make a informercial with jus her in it.

[TeeEye84Plus]

1:39 looks all sexual

[SonyBoy4]

they should make an infomercial bout her boobs

[PandawdyBob]

The pizza looks good. But you still gotta make the crust. That's more than 8 minutes.

[Phiddlesticks]

yo man you just take the wheat and put it straight in the BULLET EXPRESS and then bam, you have a pizza crust, ready to heat or eat, in just 8 seconds or less!

[g4tech]

Meatloaf Expert Huh? I dont think so cause how would that be Fantastic it prob tastes like shit

[spotdathief]

they had the nerve to use the word "powerful" and "400 watt" in the same sentence...

[PandawdyBob]

The first magic bullet did have a powerful motor. How does the motor in this new one compare?

[chr1s524]

The two old hags need to go fuck themselves.

[djskizmarkey]

the fat ass stole the plate ,!!hahahah

[reddash70]

The tomat0es look like she got her finger cuaght in the machine

[NPRMc]

This party was just hours after Aunt Hazel's funeral.

[chr1s524]

Hahaha!!

[jencat13]

aunt marthas my idol

[geekboyII]

Family meal, eh? I got a feeling you're trying to sell us something.

[piratesrule333]

he tells me to "look at that" to many times i dont want to look

[g4tech]

When Mick is mixing the salad Why does he look like he hates his life

[EnterNameHere76]

@g4tech cause he secrely does lmao

[knuckles362]

you would too if that was your family

[0Mike0Banks0]

i guess they couldn't afford the kids at the beginning for the whole thing

[mission762008]

Ralphie Boy looks like he wants to just go postal on the entire family at 4 mins when they tell him he walked his fat ass around the kitchen grabbing untensils for nothing! The end cuts right before Ralphie cold cocks Granny in the face for daring to mock his obesity

[horsemania1]

lmfao what a fucking failed product!!!

[NatalieheartZim]

BAD ACTING

[dmc4sh]

mimi's giving swine flu to everyone she never washed her hands and she's touching the chips and peperoni

[stemuris]

certo che gli americani se ne inventano di cazzate!!!

[n2n001]

You don't put cheesecake in the oven. . .

[spotdathief]

Ummm then where do you put it? How will it cook? Lol...

[miafey21]

There are two kinds of cheesecake, actually. Baked and unbaked. The baked includes eggs and goes in the oven, while the unbaked is made with gelatin and goes in the refrigerator. :)

[wrigleyluvr510]

4:35 to about 5:00. funniest part ever.

[GodBlessNYC]

at 4:37 - 4:43 .... GAY!! they think theyre funni but theyre fuckin stupud :(

[FlexoFlex56]

Seriously, the fat guy, is so gay! How can a Red Head woman can love a fat ass Nacho eater!

[alliekat28]

I LOL-ed.

[TheYoungBurnside]

Where's the food?! xDD That fat guy is amazing.