"And it Came to Pass"

[lonewuf]

"That rock n roll was born!"

[SpeckCipher]

Clever

[thrond]

...

[PT109Boat]

Please stop. I can't stop laughing... it's dangerous to see several of your videos in a row...

They are TOO DAMM FUNNY

[JonathanClement140]

You know, it just occurred to me... The reason the girls in the mormon church were so fussy about a guy going on a mission was because if they didn't, they weren't worthy of the temple marriage, and therefore, they couldn't become a goddess... So, I guess any "eternal marriage" I might have been a part of, would have been a sham, whether it was true or not... They're not with me because they want to be with me for eternity... They're with me because they want to become goddesses.

[WERTY1112]

They actually tell women they will become goddesses?

By the life of me I cannot figure it out how people can subsribe to this superstition and nonsense in this day&age.

I'm fine with the gathering every sunday or whatever and compare clothing but why all the empty promises of divinity?...

[JonathanClement140]

Yes, they do. Well, in actuality, they're "eternally pregnant", but they're still goddesses none the less. It's more the men that get to rule over their own planet. The women are really just breeding vessels. I didn't like the idea of having BILLIONS of children. I just wanted a few. The whole point was to be able to have the CHOICE to have children.

[WERTY1112]

'Eternally pregnant', sounds like an eternity of constant morning sickness and labor pains. But then again perhaps after your first million kids it starts to quiet down ey. ;)

[JonathanClement140]

Well, I would imagine that stuff is only on earth.

Still, I miss those days... I learned so much about myself and the world... I experienced my first heart-break, and for a while, I had the hope that my hearts dearest wish would be granted. Fortunately, I couldn't find any girls in the church that interested me. So, I got so depressed, I thought critically and realized how retarded I'd have to be to believe in it.

[WERTY1112]

A roller coaster of emotion i'd call it.

[JonathanClement140]

Yeah... All to end in disappointment... But it was fun while it lasted... Hopefully, there's an afterlife after all and I can experience all of these things all over again... Perhaps with a few variations on it...

Though, nothing beats the night I read that fanfiction... On that night, I grew up in a sudden burst. After that, I thought for sure I would ultimately be happy in the end and be with a woman for all eternity.

[WERTY1112]

I wouldnt put my hopes up there being somesort of life as we know it after this one. And by that i mean the most logically form of life you'd be is wormfood and helping push up the grass. So it a sense that is a nice reincarnation for you.

But do yourself a favor if you havnt already: Get a woman have kids and you'll have done well and will be mostly happy in years to come!

[JonathanClement140]

Problem is, I hear most women like bastards.

As for the afterlife, I have found that it takes too many mental gymnastics to believe in a purely materialistic world. The problem of consciousness.

[WERTY1112]

Women flirt with bastards. But they take home the nice guys. My experiance atleast this is what they do.

[AbbeyNormal]

LOL, I love the Mark Twain quote, it was exactly what I was thinking when I first read part of the Book of Mormon. It was like he was trying to write in 17th century English but didn't really know how so he threw a bunch of archaic-sounding language in there. Like me when I'm trying to do Shakespeare, I just put "-eth" onto the end of each verb :D

MORTAL KOMBAT!!

[valvatica]

blame shiity translations like KJV (and most if not all translations) for this bullshit construct. "yiheyeh" from the hebrew starts many verses and those who've tried to find better ways to translate simply say it shouldn't be translated, because there word is merely there to indicate the predicate took place in the past.

[SeenAndNotSeen]

The KJV is only indirectly to blame here. Presumably, Joseph Smith saw it in the KJV and thought it sounded old and scriptural, so he used it in his book over and over again. Whereas the Bible was translated from ancient Hebrew, the Book of Mormon was supposedly translated from lost Native American heiroglyphics, but was almost certainly just made up by Smith in English.

While the KJV uses the phrase "And it came to pass" in 1.45% of the verses, the BoM uses it in almost 20% of the verses.

[Raptor302]

"And it came to pass gas...."

[plato12000]

Remember guys, the second M in "Mormon" is silent.

;-)

[WERTY1112]

Roflcopter!

[JonathanClement140]

Ah, Mormonism... I remember how I was interested in joining that church because they were the only sect of Christianity that believed you could have sex, romance, and procreation in heaven. It was the only church where I had a hope of finding a girl who wanted to be with me for all eternity. However, I couldn't find a girl who I found to be really interesting. Then, after a heartbreak, I thought critically about it and realized how retarded I'd have to be to believe in it.

[WERTY1112]

cool story bro

[rja125]

Sega!

[bawokoroma]

lol this dudes face is hella funny.

[easuter]

LMAO!

Excellent as always :D

[Cellsplitter]

And it Came to Pass that mormons are noobs :P

[GodKillerAtheist]

LOL Mormons wish they were as good as Noobs the Mormon cult I was in thought that Video games, Doctors, Science and Dinosaur bones were the tools of the devil to trick us.....