you are worthy to breath baby sorry. you battle the storms inside you, but rember don't bring trouble on yourself so that you can know that you have done your part and it all rest on them. My you find comfort in the small things. Such as the sun on your face and a warm place to sleep for therenarenthose who dontneven have that.
Ultimately, my psychologist told me that although I did a lot of progress and greatly changed for the best, I should not expect that other people had changed even if I wished. Hence, I had to face reality, count my blessings and make very hard choices including rejecting my mother. I was fortunate that my paternal grandmother raised me as her own son even if I wasn't fully fulfilled. I hope that sharing my story will make you realize that you are not alone. A lot of people can have children but
I had not been in contact with my mom for 6 years until yesterday when I told her that I didn't want her in my life and to not contact me again. She walked away from my sister and I when I was 4 to "redo her life" (what she told the judge), never paid child support, used us as a weapon against our family by filling our heads with lies and all this awful stress caused me to wet the bed until I was 19-20. I spent 4 years with a child psychologist and 2 years with an adult one to solve a lot of su
@odism1 She understood it perfectly, she didn't accept, and it's unacceptable. What an stupid love that keeps you away from someone because sexuality.... what the word "right" means for you?
its ok..u are worth alot.god bless u.u r the key to the puzzel.u know when yer right.
most of us go or have gone through the same thing.get a job a car and find a home for yourself.its bad to stay.you know thats true.message if u need to talk.its ok.stay strong and remember lifes journey has lots of chapters and some are waiting for u.
Im glad you replied. Like i said i think the only way to get rid of this pain is to kill myself. My grandparents split up 5 years ago and I live with my grandfather Paul. He is just a grumy old man and he always blames my grandma linda for everything. I dont know what to do. If you want to get ahold of me my e-mail is britgirl_uma@yahoo.com maybe we can help each other btw this is not my youtube account im using a friends account so dont reply anymore to youtube. fornow your frined britney.
I feel bad for you but i just need somewhere to talk about my problems. I feel if i just get it out there some how ill feel better. I cant stand my family sometimes my grandparents drive me crazy. Im so pissed off at life i want to take a gun and blow away myself and anyone that i believe should die. I was a nice kid i grew into this person whom hates everyone. I just want things to be fair i hate this world. I feel the only way to get rid of this pain is killing myself or torturing someone.bye
if i have kids im going to support them 100% just for all of us trans people who have or had parents who will never understand. It fucking sucks to be all alone and id never do that to anyone
I'm going through almost the same thing. Only I'm MTF and the issue is mainly with my father. He's currently battling cancer and he too is using the guise of worrying for my safety as an excuse to let him get stressed over my transition and tell me that I'm making his condition worse.
He keeps telling me to "postpone" my transition, which doesn't say jack shit for someone who doesn't even want it to happen. And he too has made me question things that shouldn't even be questioned.
i'm so sorry that you went through all of this and that you are lacking support from your parents. i cannot possibly imagine what that is like but you are awesome dude and i really hope you stay strong.
The things you were saying in the clips where you were at your house talking about how you feel unloved are things I was thinking and journaling about every day when I came out to my parents. My partner is trans and still lives at home. I know it will be hard as hell for him to tell his parents that their daughter is actually their son. They will kick him out of the house and probably not want to speak to him again. But he has me. You are not alone. You will not feel unloved forever.
The bible actually doesn't say anything about getting a sex change for the same reason it doesn't say anything about not leaving narrow-minded, judgmental comments on youtube. The technology didn't exist back then. There were judgmental people back then, though, and I suggest you go back and read what Jesus had to say to them.
After seeing this video, I HAD to comment. I am not ever going to say "I know what you're going through." But I do know the similar feelings. When you don't have a supportive family, if feels like you are on your own.
After you start to transition, you lose people who thought were friends. The walls close in on you.
You are not alone, dear. You are a brave. To boldly speak your feelings public, to show tears and REAL emotion. You have my best wishes. <3
parents don't know shit about their own kids, because they get so caught up in their own fucking lives that they lose touch with everything that matters and just want to be selfish as adults. Life sucks, but this video shows that it IS possible to make it if you have the right outlets, if you keep faith. And it shows how hard it is to live life as yourself. So many people never even find themselves. You are so lucky to have done so. Thank you, this video is spectacular.
ey man! I Admire you! i wish i have your courage, because i don t have it, I will live in this miserable live, being not myself, so stay strong and remember is time to be selfish!
hey man i'm really proud of you and its gonna be hard but this is the time to be selfish and do what makes you happy.....and i just wanted to say i admire you for doin what you have to do in order to feel complete
it would be much easier kill yourself but thats for losers and cowards listen whenur at ground zero now where to go but up...whats wrongs with hating and never speaking to your parents find sum1 else to talk to and make your own family....yup that is usually what parents do put there self image above others...suggestion wud be to move out...cause u cant make em love you 5:20 i so kno what u mean...
I can't imagine what it would be like to be in a body that isn't my own. Sure, sometimes I feel fat, or stupid, or ugly, but at least I know it's me being fat and ugly and stupid...
I'm glad I'm a lady, and I wish you the very best, love.
wow... This is one of the saddest things i have seen on youtube thats why i dont want to come out to my mom, im scared we are so close its hard being 14 and gay and having no one to talk to about stuff. im alone my only really close gay friend moved so no one around me understands how hard it is i hate thinking about coming out i get sick to my stomach and just want to cry.
I'm 25 years old. I lost my mother 3 months ago. I have two younger sisters (24 and 19). My father just left home yesterday, saying that he feels that we are condemning him and blaming him for everything. He's become a paranoid. Were you able to live by yourself? Kudos 2 u for that. Family is not necesarily related to blood, family is whoever gives you a hand unconditionally, which I don't have right now, yup not even friends, they were ocassionally with me, when my mother was in the hospital.
Sweet child, every human is born with small empty space in their heart. That empty space is reserved and can only be filled by one thing. The majority of people do die without filling it even though they spend most of their life looking for it and filling empty and depressed (like you in this video). It happened to me and more than 14 million americans every day. I will now give you the key that opens the door and fills that space: Jesus Christ (read the Bible) all the answers are there.
Well i know the feelings your talking about in this vid all too well. 25 years and they just don't give a shit about what i'm going through in my life.
As long as you keep your head up high, take one step after another and just won't let anybody or anything bring you down you can do whatever you want...as long as you're happy with what you're doing!
kaleb, you are amazing. so proud of you. this video is so huge. the feelings are so much to process - this video puts the journey into perspective in a big way. thanks for sharing this with us.
nope. there are parents who havent been taken care of themselves therefore, they use their own children for support and have unhealthy relationships. Imagine 2 children getting married and trying to raise a family on their own, that's what its like.
I agree with you Prince. Thanks so much for sharing dude - you're so strong and a true inspiration to me and so many other brothers on here. Stay strong bro.
Wow. It's interesting to see all these funky little blogs you do where you're just being silly and fun... and then to know that underneith it all is this huge amount of pain and distress.
ow dude throughout this vid i wanted to just give you such a big hug.
there are people that care about you, they may or maynot be your family but in the end they are still here, this vid also made me cry because i could relate to the pain you feel because of family issues, i havent seen or spoke to my mum in 2years and i feel worthless even now when iv moved on but you no what sometimes the best family of all is your friends they know who you are and love you for you.
aww dude... This wa sooo powerful. I just happened to be sitting watching this next to my mom and she was listening really intently and it touched her sooo mch. "it was really intense, egh" thats all she could say after the vido ended. I think this will help my relationship with my om and I. Thank you. I hope things are slowly getting better with yer family. I love you dude.
I sort of don't see my dad anymore because he's skitzotipal. I tried to write him in jail but my mail was returned. I have my mom and a large extended family that I haven't seen in a couple of years. I'm gonna go see them this Christmas. I hope you just tough it out with mom and dad.
goddddd i can relate. so many of the things you said resounded in me way deep inside, you actually made me cry because i feel a lot of the same things, and also because you were (are?) in so much pain over your family. you're very brave to put this on here.
Some people are just not worth the time to maintain the relationship with. Figuring that out was the most liberating moments of my life. Just back off, and if she loves you, she'll come to you.
Yeah, she really is... all these clips are from over 6 months ago - I have since given up on her. I still have some hope for my dad, but I don't count on it. I've pretty much moved on now. Healthiest thing to do.
If it makes you feel any better, I live with my mum, I don't talk to her, we would yell at eachother and curse eachother every night, we always fight 24/7. My dad, I don't even know him :/ So.. It's not only you who doesn't feel appreciated.
you are worthy to breath baby sorry. you battle the storms inside you, but rember don't bring trouble on yourself so that you can know that you have done your part and it all rest on them. My you find comfort in the small things. Such as the sun on your face and a warm place to sleep for therenarenthose who dontneven have that.
reyavq777 6 days ago
were they like that b4 you came out to them?
reyavq777 6 days ago
are not fit to be parents
260191894 2 months ago
Ultimately, my psychologist told me that although I did a lot of progress and greatly changed for the best, I should not expect that other people had changed even if I wished. Hence, I had to face reality, count my blessings and make very hard choices including rejecting my mother. I was fortunate that my paternal grandmother raised me as her own son even if I wasn't fully fulfilled. I hope that sharing my story will make you realize that you are not alone. A lot of people can have children but
260191894 2 months ago
I had not been in contact with my mom for 6 years until yesterday when I told her that I didn't want her in my life and to not contact me again. She walked away from my sister and I when I was 4 to "redo her life" (what she told the judge), never paid child support, used us as a weapon against our family by filling our heads with lies and all this awful stress caused me to wet the bed until I was 19-20. I spent 4 years with a child psychologist and 2 years with an adult one to solve a lot of su
260191894 2 months ago
Comment removed
viviane5572 2 months ago
we are proud of you, i am proud of you ..
and sorry about your mom, but you have to try to understand her, she raised you as a little girl, she wanted to see your kids..
its too hard for her to understand ..
can you try to forgive her?!
if not for her, try to do that for your self ...
odism1 6 months ago
@odism1 She understood it perfectly, she didn't accept, and it's unacceptable. What an stupid love that keeps you away from someone because sexuality.... what the word "right" means for you?
viviane5572 2 months ago
I understand that with the mum part...such a damn pain in the ass situation.
MSgtErinMcLeod 7 months ago
Go and check our Titles on our channel...Might be something that could help you.
ineedhelpp1 8 months ago
its ok..u are worth alot.god bless u.u r the key to the puzzel.u know when yer right.
most of us go or have gone through the same thing.get a job a car and find a home for yourself.its bad to stay.you know thats true.message if u need to talk.its ok.stay strong and remember lifes journey has lots of chapters and some are waiting for u.
take care
MackTruck40 8 months ago
Im glad you replied. Like i said i think the only way to get rid of this pain is to kill myself. My grandparents split up 5 years ago and I live with my grandfather Paul. He is just a grumy old man and he always blames my grandma linda for everything. I dont know what to do. If you want to get ahold of me my e-mail is britgirl_uma@yahoo.com maybe we can help each other btw this is not my youtube account im using a friends account so dont reply anymore to youtube. fornow your frined britney.
ThyAnarchist87 9 months ago
I feel bad for you but i just need somewhere to talk about my problems. I feel if i just get it out there some how ill feel better. I cant stand my family sometimes my grandparents drive me crazy. Im so pissed off at life i want to take a gun and blow away myself and anyone that i believe should die. I was a nice kid i grew into this person whom hates everyone. I just want things to be fair i hate this world. I feel the only way to get rid of this pain is killing myself or torturing someone.bye
ThyAnarchist87 9 months ago
i wish i could totally just come out and give you a hug right now. ._.;
Neekolassify 10 months ago
if i have kids im going to support them 100% just for all of us trans people who have or had parents who will never understand. It fucking sucks to be all alone and id never do that to anyone
glayiscool 10 months ago
i know the feeling of having no family. my family is absolutely unsupportive in every way.
iLandentify 1 year ago
@iLandentify
So's mine. :(
ndskjflmfelkf 10 months ago
you poor girl.. well i just want you to know that i totally undertand what your going through .. i hope everything now is better for you
peyton2010harmony 1 year ago
I'm going through almost the same thing. Only I'm MTF and the issue is mainly with my father. He's currently battling cancer and he too is using the guise of worrying for my safety as an excuse to let him get stressed over my transition and tell me that I'm making his condition worse.
He keeps telling me to "postpone" my transition, which doesn't say jack shit for someone who doesn't even want it to happen. And he too has made me question things that shouldn't even be questioned.
*hugs*
Minakou1 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
Russian women on the street ** leefoxnow.info **
monica51bdgvzfs 1 year ago
Keep ya head up
HRTOACTIVIST 1 year ago
i'm so sorry that you went through all of this and that you are lacking support from your parents. i cannot possibly imagine what that is like but you are awesome dude and i really hope you stay strong.
callestreets22 1 year ago
Go for it, dont be afraid, its all about you, you are a survivor.
albertsirbu 1 year ago
This comment has received too many negative votes show
WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU ON MAN / WOMAN
bike4life1996 2 years ago
The things you were saying in the clips where you were at your house talking about how you feel unloved are things I was thinking and journaling about every day when I came out to my parents. My partner is trans and still lives at home. I know it will be hard as hell for him to tell his parents that their daughter is actually their son. They will kick him out of the house and probably not want to speak to him again. But he has me. You are not alone. You will not feel unloved forever.
Ichthusbeliever 2 years ago
This has been flagged as spam show
What' is the big difference about your video clip.
And How come your complaining to your mom only because you want to be man.
You know changing your sex is a sin in the bible and yes its True.
So stop complaining and be yourself.
JasielMartin92 2 years ago
This comment has received too many negative votes show
What' is the big difference about your video clip.
And How your complaining to your mom only because you want to be man.
You know changing your sex is a sin in the bible and yes its True.
So stop complaining and be yourself.
JasielMartin92 2 years ago
The bible actually doesn't say anything about getting a sex change for the same reason it doesn't say anything about not leaving narrow-minded, judgmental comments on youtube. The technology didn't exist back then. There were judgmental people back then, though, and I suggest you go back and read what Jesus had to say to them.
Ichthusbeliever 2 years ago 6
I'll save u..I know exactly how u feel :'(...You are worth something..everything.
VanillaShordi27 2 years ago 3
You're amazing. You deserve the respect of every other person in the world.♥♥
i really hope things turn out well..if they did. Yaay x3! and if they didn't..my support goes to you 100%. :D
Neekolassify 2 years ago 4
After seeing this video, I HAD to comment. I am not ever going to say "I know what you're going through." But I do know the similar feelings. When you don't have a supportive family, if feels like you are on your own.
After you start to transition, you lose people who thought were friends. The walls close in on you.
You are not alone, dear. You are a brave. To boldly speak your feelings public, to show tears and REAL emotion. You have my best wishes. <3
raenevox 2 years ago 4
This comment has received too many negative votes show
nooooooooooooooo cuz i didnt think you were a human!! i thought you were a dog!! lol jk jk dont get offended!
shobbs76 2 years ago
parents don't know shit about their own kids, because they get so caught up in their own fucking lives that they lose touch with everything that matters and just want to be selfish as adults. Life sucks, but this video shows that it IS possible to make it if you have the right outlets, if you keep faith. And it shows how hard it is to live life as yourself. So many people never even find themselves. You are so lucky to have done so. Thank you, this video is spectacular.
XXsilentheatXX 2 years ago 2
@XXsilentheatXX wow...really? you parents must really suck then!! Not all parents are like that....mine are amazing!
NZDEBUK 2 years ago
Hey.. Your video really touched me... Made me cry a lot.
I really hope you're okay.
Keep smiling, you're handsome.
<3
If you need someone to talk to, message me or something.
suicidexholiday 2 years ago 13
ey man! I Admire you! i wish i have your courage, because i don t have it, I will live in this miserable live, being not myself, so stay strong and remember is time to be selfish!
RoxSal2320 2 years ago
excuse me while i light my scliff
haaaaaaa haaaaaaa haaaaaaa
good god i gotta take a lift
cause in reality i just cant drift
thats why im stayin with the scliff
haaaaaaa haaaaaaa haaaaaaa
have a good day mahn
ButteryCommando 2 years ago
VISIT OUR CHANNEL TO GET SUPPORT!
ADVICETUBE2009 2 years ago
It will okay please calm down,I will pray 4 u! u r a good kid! And God will always love u and accept u just the way u r! I promise!!!
kcmay8 2 years ago
Wow.
Yeah, I hate how parents are worried about what others think... who fucking cares about what others think?
Cassie873 2 years ago
OMG you are soo beautiful. you are in my thoughts and prayers god bless you.
lapuasocom 2 years ago 4
District 202 :: Creating Safe Space
paulahare2 3 years ago
I'm soory man, that really really sucks, hope things are better now.... you look amazing as a boy or a girl, im jealous :]
thefoosballwizard 3 years ago 2
hey man i'm really proud of you and its gonna be hard but this is the time to be selfish and do what makes you happy.....and i just wanted to say i admire you for doin what you have to do in order to feel complete
punkmedicrainbow 3 years ago 2
Wow, you're fucking ridiculous.
bleedingembryo 3 years ago
I'll be your family man. I've been thinking about geting a transition. Maybe you can help me out.
Drumlinebaby08 3 years ago
it would be much easier kill yourself but thats for losers and cowards listen whenur at ground zero now where to go but up...whats wrongs with hating and never speaking to your parents find sum1 else to talk to and make your own family....yup that is usually what parents do put there self image above others...suggestion wud be to move out...cause u cant make em love you 5:20 i so kno what u mean...
GREYDE2 3 years ago
I'm sorry.
I'll be your family! :}
I can't imagine what it would be like to be in a body that isn't my own. Sure, sometimes I feel fat, or stupid, or ugly, but at least I know it's me being fat and ugly and stupid...
I'm glad I'm a lady, and I wish you the very best, love.
I'm sorry again.
outfitmadeofawesome 3 years ago
wow... This is one of the saddest things i have seen on youtube thats why i dont want to come out to my mom, im scared we are so close its hard being 14 and gay and having no one to talk to about stuff. im alone my only really close gay friend moved so no one around me understands how hard it is i hate thinking about coming out i get sick to my stomach and just want to cry.
DavidDtfBABY 3 years ago
I'm 25 years old. I lost my mother 3 months ago. I have two younger sisters (24 and 19). My father just left home yesterday, saying that he feels that we are condemning him and blaming him for everything. He's become a paranoid. Were you able to live by yourself? Kudos 2 u for that. Family is not necesarily related to blood, family is whoever gives you a hand unconditionally, which I don't have right now, yup not even friends, they were ocassionally with me, when my mother was in the hospital.
vasco1983 3 years ago
damn... I think you are beautiful. Inside and out, and I have never watched any of your videos b4, but this really touched my heart.
(PS: I started Wellbutrin a couple months ago, and it has worked pretty awesomly)
slider9012 3 years ago 2
This has been flagged as spam show
Sweet child, every human is born with small empty space in their heart. That empty space is reserved and can only be filled by one thing. The majority of people do die without filling it even though they spend most of their life looking for it and filling empty and depressed (like you in this video). It happened to me and more than 14 million americans every day. I will now give you the key that opens the door and fills that space: Jesus Christ (read the Bible) all the answers are there.
cooltechie 3 years ago
I relate to you because my parents don't believe a word a say and I have no one to turn too . Because they think I'm making shit up. :(
orlisorchid 3 years ago
wow... this hit some of my most deeply buried nerves. it just makes me want to hug you. you're so strong, so brave and so powerful.
Saxwoman2 3 years ago 4
I can understand what you talk about. Its sad that you feel that way. Wish I could do something, even though I'm a day away.
You are very inspiring and strong person!
Take care!
/Zimon
lebben90 3 years ago
You're a beautiful soul.
MeepMarmoset 3 years ago 3
Well i know the feelings your talking about in this vid all too well. 25 years and they just don't give a shit about what i'm going through in my life.
As long as you keep your head up high, take one step after another and just won't let anybody or anything bring you down you can do whatever you want...as long as you're happy with what you're doing!
Illuminares 3 years ago
Damn...this made me cry, dude...
Very powerful. And I commend you, I wouldn't have the guts to post me crying my eyes out, and spilling my heart out for the whole world to see.
Thanks for sharing.
VampiraDeNebula 3 years ago 4
I am proud of you showing us this it is inspirational and you are so strong.
thechibster 3 years ago 2
kaleb, you are amazing. so proud of you. this video is so huge. the feelings are so much to process - this video puts the journey into perspective in a big way. thanks for sharing this with us.
honeynvrhadaname 3 years ago 2
i think if your parents saw this, something might click. but i understand how hard that may be. stay strong.
andthenwhatxx 3 years ago 2
nope. there are parents who havent been taken care of themselves therefore, they use their own children for support and have unhealthy relationships. Imagine 2 children getting married and trying to raise a family on their own, that's what its like.
clokwize 3 years ago
you are an amazing person and you deserve the best.
iliveinacubicle 3 years ago 2
wow.
ANFjace 3 years ago
Wow. Thank you for sharing these thoughts. I've been going through them, as well, and it's a comfort to know that I'm not alone in feeling them.
PrinceMuffin 3 years ago
I agree with you Prince. Thanks so much for sharing dude - you're so strong and a true inspiration to me and so many other brothers on here. Stay strong bro.
Ben
musely81 3 years ago
Hey you.
Yeah, you.
You're He-Man.
The Bravest.
theskyisdeeper 3 years ago
Wow. It's interesting to see all these funky little blogs you do where you're just being silly and fun... and then to know that underneith it all is this huge amount of pain and distress.
Thanks for sharing this.
quinthe1st 3 years ago
You are so very strong. Thank you for sharing.
hollymichigan 3 years ago
i'm proud of you!
indieprince 3 years ago 2
ow dude throughout this vid i wanted to just give you such a big hug.
there are people that care about you, they may or maynot be your family but in the end they are still here, this vid also made me cry because i could relate to the pain you feel because of family issues, i havent seen or spoke to my mum in 2years and i feel worthless even now when iv moved on but you no what sometimes the best family of all is your friends they know who you are and love you for you.
feel better soon
code
nailskepttidy 3 years ago
You have nothing to be ashamed of to tell you the truth....and fuck them if they dont love you
you could make it on your own
pyro666maggot 3 years ago
aww dude... This wa sooo powerful. I just happened to be sitting watching this next to my mom and she was listening really intently and it touched her sooo mch. "it was really intense, egh" thats all she could say after the vido ended. I think this will help my relationship with my om and I. Thank you. I hope things are slowly getting better with yer family. I love you dude.
Your brother.
Riley
unmaskedemotions 3 years ago
I sort of don't see my dad anymore because he's skitzotipal. I tried to write him in jail but my mail was returned. I have my mom and a large extended family that I haven't seen in a couple of years. I'm gonna go see them this Christmas. I hope you just tough it out with mom and dad.
darondue 3 years ago
i'm here for you hon!
banditgirly 3 years ago
it is so amazing you would share this with us all. thankies hon
<3 Lili PoP
LimnuLimnu 3 years ago
We're so proud of you ((hugs))
kieron2007 3 years ago
goddddd i can relate. so many of the things you said resounded in me way deep inside, you actually made me cry because i feel a lot of the same things, and also because you were (are?) in so much pain over your family. you're very brave to put this on here.
HappyHyperHippie 3 years ago 3
Your mom's kind of a bitch dude.
Some people are just not worth the time to maintain the relationship with. Figuring that out was the most liberating moments of my life. Just back off, and if she loves you, she'll come to you.
glamgrif 3 years ago 6
Yeah, she really is... all these clips are from over 6 months ago - I have since given up on her. I still have some hope for my dad, but I don't count on it. I've pretty much moved on now. Healthiest thing to do.
bleedingembryo 3 years ago
I agree, it can be hard though. Some people reunite with relatives after long absences... Absence makes the heart grow fonder? Maybe?
Anyway, I think you're awesome :)
glamgrif 3 years ago
@bleedingembryo Awww I feel so sorry for you :(
Dw there's always someone who'll care :)
If it makes you feel any better, I live with my mum, I don't talk to her, we would yell at eachother and curse eachother every night, we always fight 24/7. My dad, I don't even know him :/ So.. It's not only you who doesn't feel appreciated.
TheYAnni97 6 months ago
I just Uploaded a Video with me on the Phone with my Mom U should check it out kaleb...
eliaspj83 3 years ago
u got big balls puttin urself out there like this. great vid
signoffs 3 years ago 12
we are proud of you <3 !!
pigpen7471 3 years ago 5
wow dude, you looks and sound WAY DIFFERENT!!
this is almost as crazy as going back and watching my first videos
pigpen7471 3 years ago