Half Life 2 Episode One - Dr Kleiner Says to Get Busy

[Chikunnism]

GLaDOS: In laymen terms, speedy thing goes in speedy thing comes out.

[oobietime8]

What if they were having sex in the room with the floor that breaks and zombies underneath, that would be bad timing 0_0

[MrIHunter1]

Gordon: YES! I LOVE U DOC! well alyx, u heard the man

Alyx....*smiles*

[MrIHunter1]

lol

[RH98]

When was the bit where Eli basically suggests that Gordon should fuck his daughter, and Alyx gets all embarrassed? Seriously I'm not making that up. It might have been a bit more subtle then I remember but that was the basic gist of it.

[JackYack13]

@RH98 It was right before the end of episode 2, just before they launched the rocket to close the portal thing.

[castrwilliam]

@RH98 Episode 2 on the elevator in the silo.

[oobietime8]

@RH98 yah in episode 2 at white forest, he says he wants grandkids. XD

[misaelfaust86]

kleiner is a pervert

[dsprandom]

LOL

[roxasfruit]

gordon: well... since we have to do it

yes alyx i may dislike this as much as you but it has to be done

*later*

HOLY SHT THAT WAS AWESUM

[TedieJena531]

Too bad Eli isn't in the room...he'd probably be looking at Gordon and pointing at Alyx like "Get busy".

[pkerch00b1]

gordon: alright! orgy anyone?

[IMN666]

i love how dr. kleiner can turn something like sex into a scientific "procedure"

[unknow5763]

he says that on every board big sercert says it also in half life 2 when your in the last chapter n00b

[brutaka359]

Gordon: Alyx, I've got something to show u!

Alyx: oh uh...

Gordon: Get over here, bitch! (Gordon fucks Alyx)

Alyx: help!

Gordon: Now u wish u were with that stalker!

[DrlchknJr]

@brutaka359 that's...messed up..

[Darkmatter28031]

oh, i din't cacth the fact there was no one yonger than adult in half-life 2 and i was wondering why, ell i don't see how a beam can stop people from having sex

[ZeroAdam2009]

one of the missions is to blow up this generator called the suppressor, which not only acts as a wide berth 'contraceptive' field, also apparently allowed the combine to drop laser beams from the sky...

[oobietime8]

@Darkmatter28031 well it supresses urges, so it could affect hormones and stuff

[majormax13]

Dispensin' an erection!

[JorshItUp]

Eli tells Gordon and Alyx to fuck as well. XD

[Darkmatter28031]

really when?

[brutaka359]

in ep 2 at the begining of chapter "our mutual field"

[DB1994DB]

Gordon:"Alyx....can you come over here"

Alyx:"Oh god no,Gordon we barely know each other!"

Gordon:"Whoa! What,I was going to ask you where Barney's at."

Alyx:(jaw hanging)

[conizme1]

Gordon: "Alyx.. can we.."

Alyx: Oh.. gordon.. no, thats disgusting!"

Gordon: "Oh yeah, yeah I completely agree.."

Gordon: "Its just that.. (Lump appears in HEV suit)

Alyx: "Urrrrgh, get... that.. away from me.."

HEV: Sawblades activated.

Gordon: Oh.. oh shit.. OH SHIT...

[brutaka359]

Sawblades???

[conizme1]

Those blades you can pick up with the gravity gun in ravenholm and shoot at zombies.

[brutaka359]

Yeah I know, but I dont get the "Saw blades activated" part, since when does the HEV suit have saw blades?

[conizme1]

Its a joke.

[Judes6647]

Gordon: Urm, Alyx... come here a sec...

Alyx: heh, Gordon your crowbar is poking me again!

Dog: *holding crowbar* Whurp?

[topchiiski3149]

Gordon:"He's talking about sex ololololol!!!"

[YouLoseAndIWin]

hmmm....

...

 hey alyx

[ALBERTWESKERZERO]

now is a perfect time for procreation ... all ladies over 18 come to me ... but ... you know not too old i dont wanna have an old grannie fan base or summin.

[nicholasblanger]

........*_*

[halopwner179]

the combie hs the mens balls cliced oof and tubes tied jk lol

[FloodMauler125]

This makes me wonder, where do the Combine put the serpretion fields O_o

[Serio17]

Actually, if you want an honest question; The "fields" is a gas that apparently prevents them from "reproducing".

[Babymarioluigi1]

yes, aren't you?

[KamakazieIdiot]

kleiner has a BAD sense of timing, its an intergaiactic invasion and he is telling everyone to have sex and raise a family. my verdict about kleiner... VIRGIN 4 LIFE!

[grammatoncleric117]

KamakazieIdiot shoves cucumbers up his arse to make his mom proud. She gives him a nickel and a tickle for every pickle. On weekends KamakazieIdiot puts on his sexy black dress and crotchless panties then runs around screaming Soulja boy Soulja boy me sucky sucky 5 dolla!!!

[pvtpuffy]

The point is rebuilding the human race's decimated population. If you hear klieners speak, he says that the combine on earth are now isolated from their homeworld.

[Rockenrussproduction]

@KamakazieIdiot they couldnt make baibies before and nows there chance, they dont know how long they have until its gone so thats why their doing it right away

[DrlchknJr]

@KamakazieIdiot he is telling everyone to have kids so that they can one day become soldiers and help the cause

[halflifefan84]

@KamakazieIdiot Nah, he get's a lotta pussy ;D

[gethsoftware]

@KamakazieIdiot i guess. but what is usefull for species is not allwasy usefull for individual.

[icarteri]

lol

[ignuska]

i didnt heard that becouse i shoot the TV the first second i saw it....ROFL

[darkpivotpro]

Me too, lawl.

[Ghlan]

Gordons one lucky dog, and i DONT mean the robot

[BWF89]

Why does everyone in Half Life 2 refer to sex as "mating"? Like when you keep talking to one of our fellow soldiers and he says "When this is all over I'm going to mate".

[SMODSubjectDave]

Cuz after about twenty or so years of hearing it called mating instead of sex, they have begun using the word mating instead of sex.

[MccThrane]

Okaaay well lets get going!

[BrotoxOwns]

alyx: Gordon, wanna go upstairs for an hour?

[BrotoxOwns]

alyx: Gordon, wanna go upstairs for an hour?

[laxitives]

Hot.

[gordan1154]

Gordon:HELL YEAH!just let me "recharge" my "suit" lololol

[Ogaitnas900]

HEVsuit: Sexual intercourse engaged. Viagra administered.

[Mykai73]

Condom equipped.

[SSXtrikE]

Dude, the point is to make babies. Besides, bareback is better anyway.

[jacksonfromhell]

that would be the HIV suit

[conizme1]

Erection sustained.

Well done Gordon.

[JthemasterT]

Abort! Herpes detected!

Administrating antidode

[misaelfaust86]

hahahaha

[Sonicthehuman0]

Alyx a critic? guess it could be possible, funny how he talks about reproducing before the combine reset the device that prevents them from having babys but even if they didnt do you really think those people want to deal with kids as well as the combine?

[Shadow2271]

not to mention that they are not in a good neighberhood

[valhar2000]

Gotta keep pumping out those new soldiers. Hell, if fundies do it, why can't the resistance?

[zaimfullgore]

lets get busy shall we then??

[DaBunny25]

lol

[nicedude64]

HAHAHA!!!

LOL

i love it!

[carter551]

In baby terms Dr. Kliener means...

HEY BITCHS TIME TO GET FUCKED!! MAKIN BABYS BITCHS!! CMON LETS ALL GET AROUND AND FUCK!!

[Afroded]

Yeah, Alyx just hears this and looks at Gordon in a weird way... ;)

[sath345]

Dr kleiner told that it would be good time to get laid, and make mankind larger, before the combine reset some thingy that they cant make babys.

[BrotoxOwns]

they cant make babys?

thats not it

[Luy22]

LOL