Added: 5 years ago
From: dragonwings456
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  • "DO YOU THINK THEY TOOK THE BATTERIES?!" That part makes me ROFL every time!!

  • thumbs up if you think dane cook runs awesomely X3

  • Top comments like that really annoy me. If you dont like something, you have every right to post a comment saying so. YOU dont have the right to not be offended. Most people in life dont agree on most things. Deal with it, thats the way it is.

    I've heard Dane Cook's name alot the last few months and I love my comedy so I thought I'd check him out. Really not a fan. He doesnt make me laugh at all, I dont like his style or his jokes. Maybe its an American thing. Good luck to him anyway.

  • my first b&e we stole a samurai sword and a bunch of g.i. joes. LMAO what a lil fucken theiving nerd.

  • How do you know you don't like it until you watch it douche bag??? I watched it, all 8 minutes and it smelt like the inside of an ass

  • HE BLOWS

  • Mom! Come quick I know who kicked the door! If only dad was still living here he'd know

  • so funny cant stop laughing rothlmfao

  • Imagine what the peoples faces would be if the family living in that house watched this XD

  • i think dane cook was talking about my house lol

  • @valianlawrence your doors got kicked ?

  • @metalgearrexlover na someone broke in but didnt take anything

  • DANE COOK IS COMEDY FOR RETARDS

  • @justinkatz441 if you don't like it then don't watch it!

  • " What's B&E? Bacin and Eggs?? NO!!!" LMAO

  • wow this was obviously just recorded on someone elses work way to go u faggott

  • what's withh dane and humpback whales? hahaa

  • If you don't like it than go away... geez I'm so close to searching up everysingle one ofyou mother****** and coming to your*****houses to******breakdown your freakin doors and****the****out of your*****cat before running up your stairs like a ***** cop and ***** some type of sharp ***** weapon to ******you with. Than I will drag your dead ***** carcass outside and stick it into a ****** postion before kicking you in the *** that is when you beg for mercy give Dane Cook a thumbs up and i leave

  • cant.stop.laughing. Dane Cook, you rule! Btw, people who don't like him, don't watch it, obviously more than just 13 year old girls like it because he has so many people at his shows, I've had enough of jerks and idiots, dont waste ur time on a video you don't like! Stop tearing others down to build urself up, it just makes you all the more pathetic, p.s. lolz, 316 people had their doors kicked down by dane Cook, jk, :P + XD

  • @PikachuMaiden "people who don't like him, don't watch it" How can you possibly know this is funny or not until you watch it? Are you trying to prove that his fans are idiots who lack basic logic thinking? Don't be an idiot.

  • @0scottweise18 Oh rly? lolz, this'll be fun, what i mean is, since you dont undertsand, i that if u dont like the vid while ur watching, by all means do watever u plz but dont insult him or others, everyone's livs are complicated enough, especially his, so he doesnt need meanies insulting him. :)

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  • cant.stop.laughing. Dane Cook, you rule!

  • dane is freaking cool

  • louis ck > dane cook

  • This jerk off should get lost at sea and never found

  • @davgabe you said that on another vid ITS A JOKE

  • Jury duty or a Dane Cook show ? That is not even close jury duty would be alot more entertaining and fun lol then this jerk off..

  • Dana Cookie shows how many 16 year old idiots are out there.. "Oh it`s BLASTIE BLAST" What a wuss fairy

  • He has no punchline, just a stream of shitty stories that go nowhere

  • I don't know who's more annoying- Dane Cook or his incredibly stupid fans. (ie 13 year old girls)

  • Bacon and eggs

  • wow, as a video taken from a video camera off a TV, this is pretty good quality

  • gotta love these hating faggots..... fuck you. leave the vid if you dont like it, simple fucking intelligence, guess you dont have it though....

  • lmfao, funniest thing ive seen in a long time ^^

  • Dane Cook`s B & E ? the LAMEST attempt at humor ever.. You suck Cook... a total douche bag

  • @davgabe at least cock right

  • @davgabe this guy is good wtf r u talking bout?! who do you prefer?

  • @davgabe and why are you watching this video?

  • @davgabe um well you know what if you think he sucks then why the hell are you fucking watching this huuuhhh ? you big douche

  • @davgabe talk shit bud, but hes obviously funny enough to make you come here and watching him u puss

  • Dane Cook Sucks... WORST comedian I've ever come across

  • @cashJOHNNYcash17 YOU SUCK BALLS FROM AN EVIL MONKEY WITH A BIGGER DICK THAN YOURS

  • Not hate at all.. Dane Cook just sucks anyone over 16 years old knows that and if you`re 20 and still think this fool is funny, you are hopeless

  • 303 haters are gonna hate.

  • haha humpback whale

  • omfg this guy has the natural ability to be funny hes born with it.hes good

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  • that is  some shit

  • i think Dane cook is awesome he is funny as hell!!!! lol 

  • i think Dane cook is awesome he is funny as hell!!!! lol

  • 302 people got B&E'd by dane cook

  • After kicking the door in and backing out he should have had Robert change his mind and want to steal stuff. That would have been funny. Maybe Dane will steal my idea

  • @artyvlayd i dont think he will eve watch this

  • This guy just rambles about everything. Are you people hypnotized? Dane Cook sucks

  • @davgabe

    geez, get a life.

  • Only frat house A holes and bimbo`s that think the fairy is hot like this comedy REJECT... "Whatever you`re thinking of doing Dane NOOO " It`s a quest and I`m on it .. just can`t stop laughing, yeah sure YOU SUCK DANA

  • OMFG LOVE DANE COOK!

  • took the beans? took the beast?

  • @gatskillz

    took the beads

  • @Pokemonfangrl94 thx man. cheers

  • i kicked that shit in

  • i dont get it 1,692,413 views with such bad quality

  • It's called a TV card.. buy one.

  • Just checked in to confirm how unfunny this man is. He's even less funny than I thought he was.

  • we dont wanna here the story of your life..u prick!!

  • @MrManny7426 then don't listen der ta der

  • @beatbox3r ok u rapper!! lol

  • trying to hard to b funny....its so sad...wats so funny its that he looks like a bum..tight pants with bell bottoms lol brush your hair dirty whiteboy

    1

  • I love that line "Wait -wait!! dude i hear a car" " Yeah the world his full of them your gonna hear alot of them for the rest of your life.. If you hear a humpback whale tell me that shit cuz that's wierd" hahaha

  • This is the first thing i have ever seen of u and this vicious circle is awsome keep it up ur great !!!!!

  • im hungry 

  • I like Dane Cook because it's how my friends and I tell stories when we've had lots of sugar. If you don't, the why the hell are you watching this? I just hope you know Mr. T pities you.

  • those pants are so fucking tight

  • those pants are hot :) random ino

  • 290 people have good taste, this is not funny or even close

  • @oogalypoogalyman 294 people live in houses which have doors that have been kicked in

    like you do.

  • @oogalypoogalyman YOU SUCK!

  • @oogalypoogalyman OKAY WE UNDERSTAND YOU DIDNT HAVE TO MAKE 4 COMMENTS ABOUT IT.

  • this guy is about as funny as aids. honestly this is TERRIBLE

  • this guy is about as funny as aids. honestly this is SHIT

  • word of the wise if you dont like the video, and that goes with anyvideo on youtube, NOONE FUCKING CARES, dont waste your time commenting.

  • hack

  • Dank Cook is hilarious.

    Retarded flame in three... two... one...

  • omg i love him

  • all you woody allen type critics out there should be ashamed for bashing dane. the comedy world has been in a recession lately, dane is good...accept it...or name someone better

  • @dharmybum i've seen amateur comedians better than this guy.. i don't think there are too many decent comedians in america.. check out carl barron, ross noble, ricky gervais, jimeoin.. seriously this guy is terrible compared to them

  • @dharmybum Louis CK is better IMO. I like dane though this whole performance is fuckin hilarious. I give it thumbs up.

  • 285 people dislike bacon and eggs.

  • he should go back to that house 5 years later when the family thought it stopped then all of a sudden they get home the door is gone

  • did not laugh. once.

  • @sathernut you suck balls

  • @metalgearrexlover well think maybe he was robbed

  • @sathernut get a sense of humor then

  • If you have funny friends then Dane Cook won't be funny to you. If you hang out with simple, uncreative, boring folk then Cook might light your fire. I worked in theater for many years. I don't know anyone (over the age of 23) who thinks Cook is funny. I was in a room with 12 people and we're flipping channels and pause at this guy for a few moments and we ALL groan simultaneously. This is an interesting phenomenon with Cook. You love his comedy. Or you detest it.

  • @Ohmythatspainful i know tons of people over 23 that think cook is funny.

  • Daniel Tosh is better

  • CANT WAIT TO SEE HIM IN MONCTON

  • theres nothing missing but there is a lava lamp lol

  • LMFAO!

  • "if you hear a hump back whale then that's weird. tell me when you hear that anf i'll stop!" LOL

  • douchebags, meet your god!

  • i love how people get into stupid fights on here. so what if people don't like him? if you're really a 'fan' that shouldn't matter because YOU do like him.

    dane cook is my favorite comedian. that doesn't mean everyone else in the world has to like him or i'm going to flip shit.

    grow up. it's just people with nothing better to do.

    you don't have to be rude about not liking him though. but still. everyone put on your big boy pants and chill.

  • 283 people couldn't maintain their schools.

  • He's got shit material. Not funny but boring.

  • @masala505 there's not many comedians out there today that are funnier than him

  • @moonbreath1 I'm surprised - he seems like an arrogant asshole to me.

  • THIS GUY IS FUCKING HILARIOUS, I DON'T CARE WHAT THE FUCK YOU CUNTS SAY!

    thumbs up if you agree with me and hate these fuckin cunts.

  • Dude that was my house... I devorsed cause of him!!! lol jk

  • Where are the jokes?

  • I've been planning an epic B&E tour since I learned from Michael Moore that Canadians don't lock their front doors.

  • @crankrocker88 not exactly BREAKING and entering is it? thats just being a douche

  • if you hear a humpback whale let me know that shit... :)

  • I agree he is hilarious =)

  • i can always do bacon and eggs, thats fucking delicious!

  • i dont know what that means but im doing it

  • LMFAO !!!!!! I LOVE YOU DANE COOK <3

  • this is one of my favorite comedy clips ever! bacon & eggs! do you think there is someone out there who is thinking...was it dane cook who kicked in our doors?

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  • "my heart was boomdededartboomdededart"

    rofl

  • i dont get what goes through peoples minds when they search dane cook on youtube and thinks he sucks like its hard to imagine

  • @fenderbender596 Well those people are trolls. They wanna get the ones that likes him pissed. The internet is full of idiots with the soul purpose to be a jerk to others, many is just insecure whith themselves and feel good when they are trolling and bashing.

  • People who say Dane Cook sucks, GTFO! I understand you don't like it because ur IQ is below 60 so his jokes are too hard for you. Besides, your opinion is worth Shiit. Look around Dane in this vid. You see all those people? That's right, it's a freaking stadium full of ppl who like him vs you. Suck that Biatch

  • fuck dane cook. he's a hack

  • its funny because everybody can relate

  • "what the fuck did they take?"

  • lmaoo Funny Shyt Especially At Tha End

  • " I'm doing a B&E......Nooo!!!" Hilarious!!!!

  • u dont tape somethig on the tv its like wow, look at thisbad quality. it sucks! 

  • is this the new HD

  • "Stop hating on Dane Cook! Don't watch the videos! Waaahh! Waaahh! My fucking vagina hurts!!!" Lol. Only Dane's (and a select few other shitty comedians) videos have you whiny little bitches crying about it. Go to a real comedian's video, like George Carlin, Bill Hicks, Louis CK, and say that they suck. The real comedy-heads will just say "are you fucking stupid?" or something along those lines. Because those of us who know what real comedy is, don't have to defend it.

  • fuck u dude, you recorded your TV!!

  • he has huge of fan

  • dane cook was molested by cthulu

  • that was my fucking house dane cook broke into

  • lol hes so funny! xD "THEY STOLE THE BEADS, THEY FUCKING STOLE THE BEADS"

  • you copied this off of youtube, and I can prove it :)

  • "nothings gone but we never had a lava lamp..."

  • "WAIT! i hear a car..." "yeah the world is full of 'em, ur gonna hear a few" XD epic~

  • @Kira1395

    Yeah, I just love that part~!

  • ARE YOU WATCHING, DOORKICKER?

  • "If you hear a humpback whale, then that's weird. Tell me that shit, then i'll stop."

  • "i dont like adventures, what?" lol

  • lol he took the beads.

  • "I wanted to be crimnal. I'm not even kidding you guys." lol That's great. XD

  • awesome dane.... you rock!!!!

  • dane cook your awesome. i love you, your a silly bitch.

  • OMG Dane is so fucking hot and hes so damn funny!

  • haha man did you cam your TV? i mean, really? you stood there for eight minutes filming your TV? lol that's some great effort there

  • Just watched this, one of the worst I've ever seen, seemed like a bunch of teenage girls that went there for the wrong reasons. Oh well...

  • #

    Daisymai09 1.put your hands over your mouth

    2.make a wish into your hands

    3.pull your hands away from your mouth

    4.put your hands on your heart for 5 seconds

    5.if u copy and past this on 3 videos you will have the best day tomorrow

  • He just wanted to be a Spartan!

  • Dane cook is the shitt!!!! but you gotta work on your camera skills it's really blurry!!!!

  • i agree with tyzl3rd0g, if you don't like dane cook, don't waste your time to comment on his videos just to say he sucks, you only got one life, and you shouldn't waste it on saying how much dane cook or any comedian sucks, they are definitely more successful than you, if you take the time to write down how much people suck, you probably have no life

  • what the fuck did they take!?!?!? hahaha

  • I dont know if he is more comedian or eye candy!

  • I dont know if he is more comedian or eye candy!

  • all u guys need to get a life go outside God dam it!

  • @Hellow532 yea go outside n watch dane cook lol

  • why you guys watching this shit quality video.....

  • LMFAO "drive around the community, i wanna find the perfect house for my B slash E" omg dane cook is THE SHIT

  • HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA fucking b/e

  • I don't get what's with the haters out there. For the most part, this guy's pretty funny.

    I've heard a couple of his works that weren't funny, but most of them are funny.

  • The problem I have with him, is that he's not funny most of the time. When your job is being funny, and you're not? Not a good thing. Everyone has funny moments.

  • @Korridel

    I just said I found most of his work funny... so to me he's funny most of the time. But then again, the only material of his that I've seen is the stuff on Youtube.

    I found his "Late for Work" routine really funny. I could totally relate to it.

  • maby its just cuz im high but it was funny

  • I dont care what anyone says, Dane Cook is fucking hilarious, its a weird type of comedy which a lot of people like, and if you dont like him dont send stupid messages saying so just dont view his videos.

  • @TYZL3RD0G

    Maybe they are first time viewers and they want to write their opinion.

    That why the comment option is here. It's not just for kissing ass. And it's obvious you do care what people say. otherwise you wouldn't have felt compelled to write your comment.

  • @matt2eadgbe yeah okay, i put that comment up 4 months ago so you must care what people think to seeing as you've read the comments up to this point, and my comment has 38 thumbs up, get OWNED!!!