My Story
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Added: 4 years ago
From: emzkind77
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  • my friendhas the same desorder and shes realy realy close of becoming anorexic

  • im not skinny im fat i eat all the time i try not to but sometimes i cant ....

    

  • KEEP FIGHTING!

  • Ok, I'm a thin girl, but my body is naturally built tiny. I'm not anorexic or bulemic. I see myself that skinny is not the only type of beautiful. There's beautiful people in every shape, size, color, or form. Please, any girl or guy reading this right now, Embrace the way you look, Who gives a crap what others have to say about your body type. There too busy finding the flaws in you to find there own. Always keep your head up, shake it off, & be happy being yourself(:

  • @ShaneDawsonFreakkkxD I agree with you. I'm thin too but I'm not anorexic or something like this. I will never go on a diet. When I was even a very little kid I though it was so stupid, I asked myself why people don't be theirselfes. I always say that, I'm who I am and that's all it really matters. Loosing wigh is stupid! Nobody's perfect

  • I started crying when I read that they had to add a new paper for you. When I was in 7th grade in gym, my teacher made us all take our bmis and weights and i told her i didnt want to (i had dealt with ednos in the past) and she said i had to. I didnt look obese at all, but my bmi told me i was extremely overweight for my age and everything. Ever since then things got worse for me. I hope youre doing well now <3

  • love your video... helps a lot... hope u'r fine... reach 4 help...

  • It's scary... I do not throw up at the moment.. but I am 12 and I do not eat... I will be 13 soon. I tell my friends I forgot my lunch.. That I was running late... or that I'm not hungry... they call me anerexic... if only they knew the truth and that I am...

  • @Taybabe159

    hey we r the same age.... and i am to.... :[ we could join forces!

  • @novideosforme123

    I totally agree.

  • what we some of the things you would eat in a day? i used to eat an apple and water thats it

  • help

  • 3:25... WTF??? IS that her boobs???

  • no looooooooooooooool

  • oh right, her legs.... woops :)

  • Comment removed

  • I have also periods when i starve myself, the binge ans do on... I hate this! Food is destroying my life and i can`t do anything!

    If i eat, i can`t control myself and eat and eat and then i can`t do anything-go out, study... But when i`m hungry i feel happy...

  • i know wat u mean

  • Thank you so much for this video. Stay strong, fight hard. Someday it will be over for both of us.

  • need someone to talk to?

    going through the same thing..

    but ana and limia...

  • its not limia its just mia.

  • ur throwing ur life away if u do like that girl in the vid. it KILLS people to do such things to thimselfes

  • beautiful video <3

  • skinny girls arent preetyy.

  • then why are you watching stories of anorexia? lol

  • say that people think skinny is pretty but in the islands men like there women with meat every place is diffrnt that's there majority they have there where she lives

  • your right, they're beautiful.

  • <3 this is a beautiful video.

    Stay strong, recovery is possible.

    I believe you can do it.

  • I like the beginning of the video very much. In fact, people who develop an ED often were NOT deeply traumatized during their children or something. And not to know WHY they develop it is so... !

  • hey I have a question does.. bulimia really makes you go thinner??

  • no... bulimics are usually overweight.

    remember hoe she testifys by throwing up in years she became fat...

    but if you dont eat and you throw up you wont live to see yourself skinny.. you'll just die!! =]

    well i personally would rather die skinny anyways

  • Actually, bulimics are NOT usually overweight ! That's why it's so hard for friends & family to see what's going wrong. It's always about binging & purging so you don't take or lose weight most of the time (or not a lot). Most of bulimics have a normal shape.

  • Wow that was really good. I am the same. I have a loving family never had massive traumas to face but I also spent my teenege years starving then binging....etc etc. I later developed anorexia and bulmia and am still struggling.I like the way you showed how it developed over a number of years. People often think it just hits you suddenly but it is something that develops over a long period of time. It may not seem abnormal to diet then binge all the time but it is still disordered behaviour.

  • Loook..i bet you are not fat or ugly

    and i think that yeah whatever....get help

    you are going to die

    god damn it i wish i was your friend...so i could HELLLP YOUR SICK THIN ASS

  • It's not quite that easy really.

    You can't just stop being bulimic. I mean you can stop purging but it's not easy. Being bulimic sort of takes over life.

  • wooow i got touched by your video

    its just soo.... so like me

    I feel identify with u in some ways

    Like at the beginning i wasnt raped and my parents love me

    its sad what this can do to u right?

    anyway great video

  • I have the same problem...i think i am fat...but it doesnt occur to me that im 5'10 and everyone else is like 5'5 or shorter...

    but i have the exact same problem

  • could anybody tell me how to recover from this? I can't stand it anymore!

  • therapy?

  • gosh i cried to this.. i'm facing the same problem

  • thanks soo much for sharing!! i'm going through the same hell, honestly.

  • my ex fiance was trying to recover she wasnt so lucky. *god i miss her* people stop and think about the people that will miss you. i miss my ex fiance more and more everyday. it killed her guys its not worth it

  • I do that.

    Starve, binge, starve, binge.

    Binge, starve, binge, starve.

    It's an endless cycle.

    It causes me to gain, lose, gain, lose.

    For people reading this, don't get caught up in that cycle. It's hard to break free.

  • we're in the same boat. and it just feels like i'll never escape from it

  • I know!

    I binged today, too, after not eating for a while.

    I wish you luck on tying to escape :]

  • same to you hun ^^

  • Thank you =]

  • i think you're both suffering from restrictive bulimia.

  • Thank you for that information.

    :]

  • i found you when searching for "mercury" by counting crows. i guess we find what we're looking for in unusual places sometimes. i wish i had words that could do something-ANYTHING-for you. i'm not that wise of a person, but here goes...i know what it's like to be frustrated and not know why. i'm a new dad and i constantly feel like there's something i'm doing wrong. hopefully it makes me a better dad. i guess just hang in and remember there's great things in life. i'll check on you again soon.

  • grr that demon is a selfish fuck!

    wants my stomach all to itself.

    no room for food just him.

    dare i put something else in there, he quickly takes it out.

    gahh i know i shouldnt do it.

    i love my teeth. like im obsesive.

    and i know its gonna fuck them up. ):

    i cant tell anyone and someone finding out is my wosrt nightmare.

    i have to eat then wait until im in the clear, then throw up because i think i will automaticaly gain the weight.

    its so fucking ridiculous.

  • i watch that vid, 'coz i am super sonic fat lol.

    and i need to lose alot of wieght i dont eat alot at all a day and still dont know i am so fat i tried to diet but i does not work and know im thinking in going bulimic but i know that's thw wrong thing to do, thats what your vid is about doing the right and feeling happy about it. but i feel i can;t 'coz im too fat an i need to lose wieght very fast !!

    im the fastest person in my year, and i hate it. well thanks for making the vid, :D

  • love your all videos <3

  • loved the video!!!

  • i'm 14 and 5'4 i hate my body i cannot help it when starve myself i have no self control,but this video is really inspiring and has helped me realise more what I am doing to myself and getting myself into.

  • One of my most horrible memories: Doing that same weight graph when I was in elementary school, but it was fifth grade and I really was obese already. I am a teacher now, and I would DIE before I would put any of my kids through that.

  • i know this trap, this disease, this hell... im 13, 5'4, 110lbs, and i cant stop, but it helps to know there are girls like me

  • sooo. first of all. I LOVE THE VIDEO!!! absolutley inspiring. I have Ednos which means i switch between anorexia and bulima. constantly. I can really relate to what you are going through and I praise you for being able to share your story so openly.

    Second, i and im sure others, do not appreciate haters. we did/do not choose to have eating disorders. also, if you hate "skinny bitches" so much, then why are u watching a video on bulimia????? that's just stupid

    xoxoxoxo stay strong dears

  • I have lived this way for 25 years. It's not fun,it's not cool, it's not an easy way to lose weight, it's pure hell. It ends up consuming your entire life until you are nothing except eating, purging and pushing people away so you can do it and living a total lie on the outside. No one can save you except you. I wish I knew that in the beginning, because now, bulimia controls me so much, I don't think I CAN be saved.

  • im 5'3 and i wiegh 123 , which i making my self lose right now i only have 400 calories a day and i excerise

  • Im 13 4'7" and i way around 145 pounds, i hate my body and i just wanna die because of it. :[

  • weigh**

  • thanks for the video but i cant stop, not yet

    i binge off and on and then i purge...i just want to look better in my clothes..im so fat im 152 pounds

  • please, if u decide to take one thing away from this, DONT fall into this trap of starving, binging, or even allowing ur mind to have this kind of control over u. anorexia has ruined my life for the past 5 years, and i am no where near over it. please dont make this mistake.

  • i am 9 years old and i was thinking of doing that but i dont know. should i.I mean come on 9 and i weight 120 friken pounds .tell me what should i do?

  • u shouldnt do that there is hope for u i thought i was over weight and i did this but its not healhy n 120 iz not bad at all your only 9 yrs old dont start your life out by ruinig it...ur not alone n ur beautiful n just the way god wanted u.u may grow taller n your weight can change dont stoop that low to doing this if n e thing just eat healthier and exercise but by all means do not become anorexic nor belimic luv because its not the way. it can become deathly.ur beautiful n dont feel otherwise

  • Don't do it! you have your whole life ahead of you. One day you will look back and realize that the "popular,skinny"kids you think are so great right now, may end up working at the local Walmart, while you end up happy with a great career and family. Do you really want to be so thin at the price of your teeth falling off, your hair falling out, losing friends due to mood swings and having to hide your eating???? What would you rather have? A life or and never ending battle with food and weight

  • yhoo shouldnt i know you think its a quick fix and you wont let ur self get as far as almost dying but it takes over every thought and you cant stop it. You will lose weight as you get older and taller just cary on being a kid and have the life u deserve ur frnds & family love u the way u r & wldnt want you to harm urself also the people you live with will find out and after recovering ur weight can go up and down and going on the fad diets can actualy make you gain weight in the long term. <3

  • Omfg I hate this! Bulimic ppl, obsessing over there weight and shit. Throwing up. Sickens me. I wish you all DIE. There is nothing wrong with curves. Skinny bitches are ugly as hell and look scary. Go fuckin eat something and keep it in ur stomach. >.>

  • you are an ignorant fuck, go die a slow and painful death.

  • Dumbass skank, stfu. Ur probably one of these stupid anorexic whores. Go puke already, you know you need to. And go get raped by ur dad if he didn't leave you for being such a skank.

  • What is your problem girl? What are you so mad about that you have to let out your anger here? Maybe you should take a look at your own life before talking bad about somebody else's.

  • I'm not angry, it's just pisses me off about these girls. Skinny as hell, but still puke. >.> Sickens me. And my life is fine thank you very much now stfu. You fail.

  • English isn't my first language but I know that when something pisses you off, it makes you angry. Question is, what makes you angry?

    Would you like to lose some weight? Did you sister die from an eating disorder? Do you feel your life is worth nothing and are you just hurting other people to make you feel better?

    Come on, be honest with yourself. Why are you angry?

    Have you got any idea how many people you're hurting, and how much?

  • I propose we'll continue our conversation in our profiles. If we talk here you'll probably only hurt people who have nothing to do with this.

  • For your information. I'm not skinny as hell, I'm 5'6" and weigh 130 lbs. I'm bulimic. I wouldn't want to be skinny because then, people would see i have a problem. I'm o.k with my weight because it lets my bulimia go undetected. I binge/purge to numb my pain, not to be skinny.

  • My life is not fine. That's why i binge and purge, and why i'm replying to CrystalKay's comments.

  • you guys are all horrrible!

    YOU! are a phsycotic skank! how can u be sooo hurtful!?? words hurt more thanm you think!

    and by telling her this or anyone!..they might just take in to cinsideration of ur words!your a stupid mean ignrant bitch!

    wait i take that back beacause then ill be just like you which would hurt ME! more than any disease! "have a happy life"

  • lmfao Are you talkin about me hun? Cause if you are and trying to hurt me, it aint workin. What are you anyway? One of these nasty skinny bulimic whores? U probably are. Shove a finger down ur throat or a cock, either way hope you puke to death.

  • ur fucking stupid. i already said i'm bulimic and i'm not skinny. just so you know, i'm a guy. but feel free to call me a whore. i don't give a fuck about what you call me. it's not going to stop me from binging/purging!!!

  • Of course I know I need to! I'll go do it right now!

  • you can call us whatever you want. but binging and purging helps us forget about all our problems. So only death will make us stop.

  • I'm not going to keep anything in my stomach!

  • My sister only recently told me she has been bulimic for the last 5 years

    And it makes sence now because she has been obsesed with her weight since she was 7, even though she was perfectly normal.

    I hope to those of you who are bulimic, that you get better

  • Hi Emma, I found your video searching for Mercury by Counting Crows and I am touched by your story. I recognise some of my own problems (like giving up controll over my emotions) in your story and I think it's very brave and wise of you to share your story. Reading the comments I see it helps many people and I hope it helps you too.

    It seems to me you're able to touch and help people. These qualities alone make you a beautiful person.

    To all: talking about your feelings and thoughts helps!

  • choice as to do it I didn't say no because I was too fucking scared to stand up to her and I was already aware I was fat I didn't need her to tell me and the ENTIRE classs. I HATE HER! HATE HATE HATE!

  • all of grade 4 with slim fast and I had the skinny girls eat my lunches and I would pay them for it. I am not even kidding you. I can't believe this. I swear. Thankyou for adding this video, I dont care weither you had a motive just thank you. There was another girl in my class and she became anerexic and was hospitallized for it. Teachers dont understand. A graph is not an excuse to weight the entire class. And even thought we had a

  • Untill this got to age 17 I thought she was telling my life story. I havent reached 15 yet. But everything it said was honest. I am crying so bad. I can't beleive that someone else had a ignorant teacher that took there weight and made them feel like shit just for a stupid chart. I will NEVER forrgive mrs embree. She did it in grade 3 and I was called whale for my grade 3 - 5 year. I had dieted

  • r u em0o?

  • CrystalKay what in the good name of the lord is wrong with you? She made this video to RAISE AWARENESS. If you had nothing nice to say then why'd you comment? Because obviously you have everyone against you.

    I loved this video. It made me cry. My sister and mom both had an eating disorder and they think I'm at risk for one. You make it sound so bad.[No offense.. That's a good thing] Which is probably what is going to keep many kids from doing it. Great job and God bless<3

  • CrystalKay -- shut up

  • Bitch you stfu >.>

  • Your comments don't mean shit to me.

  • the choice to use ben folds in this was a brilliant choice. thank you for telling your story. people need to hear it.

  • if you want someone to throw there heart out whilst being sick then you obviosly have already thrown your heart up! Anyay get over it .. its not werth having arguments about!

    x

  • hi great vid. I can relate to u so much our stories are simular and its vids like this that keep me believing that 1 day i can leave all this behind. Stay strong.

    P.S to all u haters dnt comment on things u have no clue on.

  • One question for you crystalkay-

    can you see past your flab?! you cant help it if your have and ED!

  • Wow lol That was funny. Just to let you know, I have no flab, it have curves and that's what's beautiful. Not these skinny bitches.

  • CrystalKay (2 weeks ago) Show Hide

    I'm happy being big. =]] Ppl in the video scare me. I hope you throw up your heart and die bulimic bitch.

    :O, how rude!! im gessing your saying that to all bulimics?! well ill tell you something.. i bet there are a lot more out there than u think!! and at least this video puts people of it!! u have no idear what its like to feel so down about your self.

    i thought the video was amazing... i hope your getting better (and your friend to)

    xxxx

  • thanks for yout great video and touching story, hope u are good now :)

  • r u getting better now?

  • this is a very good video. the only thing is the second song kind of runis the whole mood of the video.. its still good though

  • well if your happy being big crystalkay then ovbioiusly you dont have an eating disorder and you dont understand them so dont tell her to throw her heart up. your the fat one

  • I'm not fat bitch, get that straight. I have curves, something this and other bulimic bitches don't have.

  • At least they're not complete bitches.

  • i am so shocked... no wonder bad things happen, its cuz of people like this

  • HA! You're obese AND obviously uneducated. Congratuations on being a failure

  • Obese is like 300 something pounds. I'm 140 you dumbass.

  • That's somewhat cruel... I'm glad you're happy, and the people in the video probably should scare me too, but why curse me?

  • i am 14 years old. before i got bulimia, i was still very thin. i eat extremelmy healthy, i have a perfect life, idk why i binge and purge, i am just afraid to weigh more then 100 pounds, i need someont to talk to.

  • i am 14 years old. before i got bulimia, i was still very thin. i eat extremelmy healthy, i have a perfect life, idk why i binge and purge, i am just afraid to weigh more then 100 pounds, i need someont to talk to.

  • i'm 14 years old - I think im fat, I really do.

    im thinking of becoming bulimic of anorexic

    and I'm a boy. I rly need someone to talk to over the internet, not in real life if someone who has experience in this and can help me out please message me cuz im rly sad every day and i honestly want help.

  • You can talk to me if you would like. Im female so im not sure how much I can tell you. But im here to listen. Im 20yrs old and have been eating disordered for about 9 yrs. Same goes for anyone else who would like to talk. I have ears :)

  • Hey, i read your comment about eating.. you can talk to me if you like...Be happy :)

    x

  • Wow, th beginning of th video is Me! I wasn't raped, abused, I hav loving parents;I never knew why I chose an eating disorder,except I thought I was fat. Aparently that's not th whole reason though,it's th way I rebeled. Now that I'm outta High school&over the whole rebelion thing, I'm stuck. I'm addicted...I have a prob&I'm sooo scard2 see what life is like w/out it, even though I KNOW it will b sooo much better! Neway, I just wanted to say thankyou 4the lovely video. Good luck in ur recovry!

  • hii.

    well this is me basically. you got in one, i count calories, i work double the calories off that eat, i binge then throw it up.

    i do hate this, but its my best friend at the same time.

    :(:(:( i hate being fat.

  • i know you are trying to help people with eating disorders but it only pushes them further.

  • well i hope that u saught help and are doing better now.

  • the best i've seen...thanks....thanks for reminding me...I'm NoT aLoNe!

    PeAcE and LoVe

  • Great video. Dont let people judge u by the way u look. Everyone is unique and has there own diferent shape.

    awesome video :)

  • Love the ending its really good!

    Are any of those pictures of you?

    Hope you're fully recovered now

    :D

  • I think it's a really beautiful video, i admire you

  • thank you for sharing this with us

    who suffer too

    get better!

  • I'm 17 and I'm a guy but I watch over many friends from school who have similar problems. The way their minds work, its almost cruel I try to ease them out of this very slowly, first with kind words to gain their trust and then all I can do for them; even if it's just sitting down and talking with them for hours. It's hard for me to find...hope, my own family has been breaking apart for a long time. You bring me hope that even through my troubles I can still help these girls to love who they are

  • god, 7, thats awful!

    :'( i feel so bad for you.

    even at 15, i can understand why you felt like that, only i am fat rather than normal.

  • im wondering. why do you look up anorexia videos as an overweight person.

  • i love ur video. very touching and truthfull

  • Almost made me cry. Story of my life at the begining, except i'm not perfectly normal. I'm not horribly fat, maybe 15 pounds over weight. But i have enough control over myself to not let myself have an eating disorder. Although i feel horrible and unlovable at times, i trust that if i don't become normal (NOT SKINNY,but NORMAL)as i grow up (i'm 13) i can find ways other than starving myself to diet. This is the first time i've actually said any of this outside my head. And thats about it... yeah

  • Hi MrsTomFelton531,

    feeling horrible and unlovable is a big load to carry all on your own. Please don't keep it to yourself. I know it feels stupid to talk about those feelings but it will probably make you feel better. You'll probably find it hard to talk about this with friends or family first. Your school probably has a confidant or confidante who will listnen to you. He/she is a professional who you can trust.

    Please, don't keep these feelings to yourself.

  • Please forgive me if I don't use the right words. English is not my first language.

  • Gribblol.. You are a HORRIBLE person. I suggest that you don't comment on a video if you have nothing worth saying.

  • Well lucky she is then, but you, no one will like you whatever you do, so I suggest you dispose of yourself.

  • Actually this is pretty much what I tell myself!

  • you were right

  • Your pursuit of perfection, which's an adorable thing, was misled in the ugliest of ways. Reconsider your beliefs, do you think of yourself as a figure? Does that what Emma means to you? Because if that was the case then I shouldn't be disgusted by Gribblol's argument, since you'll then be carrying the same beliefs; that women are only meant to amuse men, and that they're ready to KILL themselves to attain their approval of shape, and I wonder, can't you see how humiliating and lowering that is?

  • Emma is not a figure; she's a large book with hundreds of pages, with that only the cover, and while it's true that some will only look at the cover and go, those who are interested will always flip the pages, and once they do, they will love Emma for who she is, eating and not eating, young and old. Eating is a lovely social practice, not to be ashamed of. Further, loving food while eating it is as disgraceful to me as loving it while not eating it, rather than loving the company it brings :)

  • arabiccola you are a beautiful soul - I love the image of a person as a book... But I have to say that I don't think many women starve themselves to please men, because mostly men prefer healthy women! After a little while an eating disorder is mostly just about itself.

  • Unfortunately yes,, and it just breaks my heart...

  • That was beautiful.

  • Thank you!

  • I cried...I think you did a wonderful job for putting this up. Your story...has so many things in common with my own...god, I remember how I used to try to throw up and fail...then I tought myself how, something I always will regret. I remember how I was disgusted by pictures of skeletol models & people....the disgust morphed into beauty.

    I think people need to see more of these, then the stupid millions of thispiration videos.

  • I know what you mean - we look at these uber thin models and our head knows "that's not healthy" but something else inside says "yes - I want that"

  • Hey. I just watched your video, I am currently trying to recover from anorexia nervosia and have had a rough day as I have eaten ALOT. Just wanted you to know that your video has made me feel better, it reminded me why I ate alot today to gain weight, and that other people are going through the same thing. Thank you. Xx

  • I'm so glad this helped you - and I'm more than glad you're seeking recovery! Best of luck - never give up.

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