I agree there's alot of bad stuff in religion, and I backed away from it for the same reasons as you, but most christians dont like everything in the bible. They have a right to have their opinions. Alot of the time they cant accept anything else because theyre scared of what else lies beyond.
well everything evolves, everyone knows that, but that doesnt disp......" then you were interrupted by the phone. does that mean your mom at least accepts evolution?
Hey, I hope things are ok with this situation. You'll probably find that some people don't really care whether something is true or not, it doesn't really bother them. That's not just religious folks, I know plenty of atheists who don't really care either, it doesn't really bother them what is true. Personally, I find it massively important, and it seems you do too.
My mum believes in astrology, no matter how many times we talk about it I know I will never convince her she's wrong.
It's been said that you can't reason someone out of a position they didn't use reason to arrive at... consequently there's really no way to talk sense to most religious people, they typically believe it because of indoctrination or desperation, neither of which involve rational thinking.
Garry Habermas debate with Antony Flew on the issue " did Jesus rise from the dead ?"
a professional debate judge who was asked to evaluate the debate concludes
the historical evidence , though flawed , is strong enough to lead reasonable minds to conclude that Christ did indeed rise from the dead .... Habermas dose end up providing "highly probably evidence" for the historicity of the resurrection " with no plausible naturalistic evidence against it"
Beliefs are a dime a dozen, but you've only got one mom. Agree to disagree, relate to each other in love, and stay away from religious topics in conversation. From what you have relayed to your viewers: she has not disowned you, she still shows unconditional love for you, and she is still your mom. Believe me, the situation could be far worse for you than it is. Ask yourself, "Do I want to be right, or do I want to be happy?" Just my two cents.
Coming out is never an easy thing to do. When I came out to members of my family as a pagan, It was easier in some ways and slightly more difficult in others. I would suggest that at this point not to deconvert your mom, but rather say something along the lines of "This is what I believe and why but I respect your right to disagree." Remember that respect is a two way street. I'll be keeping you in my thoughts.
The most important thing is that she is willing to talk about it, even if it is like talking to a wall. I would say give it a few years. Right now you're still very much in a parent-child relationship, so probably it's hard for her to take the things you're saying entirely seriously, 'cause you're still her little baby. Once you're on a more equal adult-adult footing she may be more willing to open her mind a little. At least, that's how it went for me and my parents. Good luck!
I went through these same discussions with my grandmother, and I know the blank look they give when a rational position is explained. She eventually stopped trying to convince me of god.
The Thanksgiving dinner prayers also stopped when my brother and I were present. I guess the family tired of the tension and arguments that were promted by the prayers.
I agree with Darrel Ray on this one. It is not possible to use logic with those who are already committed fundamentalists; it's a waste of time. You should try ignoring the religious stuff completely and only acknowledge the human aspects.
Be wary of the possibility that your mother installs spyware on your computer or something. She might want to know where you are getting these heretical ideas.
...Let her have her beliefs, they may not be right, but it doesn't seem like she is trying to convert you back, right now, you are just bitching, I mean if she doesn't really care then why does it matter? How is you trying to make her be an atheist any better than them trying to convert us? you are pretty much evangelizing for atheists, and i can't stand evangelists. jusdt because your beliefs are correct, doesn't mean your actions are always right.
I'm so glad it went well after all :D! And I had no idea you had been in a hell house etc.. when you were younger.. whoa. Good you got to talk about it with her, finally.
Don't try to argue with your mom, man. I know it's a lot of drama right now, but it's got to be a big relief to have your secret out in the open. It's got a to be a big surprise for her, a lot to absorb. Give her time to come to terms with it. And maybe right now she's very defensive, but the fact that she's willing to at least listen is a big positive step. After a while, she'll start to understand more of where you're coming from, even if she never gets there herself. That;s cool, too.
Honey, I think this is the best cause scenario for you. She is not openly hostile, and you are only responsible for who you are, and what you believe.
Besides the truth is still the truth, even if she will not listen to it. I know it hurts, and I know it sucks, but some people are just too stuck in her ways.
1) Don't feel you need to debate the issue or "prove her wrong". She seems well aware of your position and you need not justify yourself and it seems she is not asking you to.
2. Allow her her beliefs as you would expect others to respect yours. Many Christians, especially the devout and dogmatic ones can be surprisingly insecure about their faith. They seek reinforcement from others and greatly fear or resent contrary positions. They are afraid of losing their faith.
i'm so glad i didn't have to go through all this sh*t, being born into highly secularized scandinavia, in a non-religious family. listening to stuff like this reminds me more of the middle east than the last super power of the world, a highly industrialized country, not one ranking along with the developing world. mentally maybe, it's still developing.
As an atheist son of a devout christian mother one thing to remember, your relationship comes first so let the little things slide. You don't need to win every battle, or argue every point. I'm not saying you will or are just from my experience the wilful ignorance can get to you. Some things you may need to take a stand on but this is your mother and fighting over her imaginary friend is not worth it. I'm not saying back down, just pick your fights.
A little advice...leave it alone! I commend you for coming out. I don't think anyone should pretend to be something they aren't, and be a fake ass. So, cudos on the fact that you have refused to play the hypocrite. However, I have had these same discussions with my grandmother for over two years now with very, very, few positive results. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink! Do what you want, but be prepared to deal with lots of stubborness. Good luck and congratulations!
It takes a lot of brass tacks to come out whilst living at home. Congratulations, I know the road will be tough for a while but it will get much easier. Coming out as atheist was so much harder for me than coming out as gay.
We all have one of those "nothing you say will change my mind" in our families, so don't sweat it.
I always try to find out who's more open to listening to some of the arguments against religion as a whole and slowly plant some seeds of thought, if you will.
Think about it this way: you were worried what would happen if your family ever found out that you're an atheist. Your mom found out and the world is still spinning on its axis. :p
The fact that your mom has already come to the "I want you to know that I still love you" means that she's probably more flexible than you originally thought. Don't expect your mom to come around quickly - but it sounds like she may see your perspective in about 5-10 years. Be patient.
Same situation as me. I dont think my mom will ever leave her faith. There is not enough curiosity/ability from her side to ever absorb an actual proof/logical argument.
I have told her that if I am ever woken up at judgement day I will not deny that Jesus is the son of God. That makes her calm.
Continue to follow your story with interest, thanks for the update. Both of my grandmothers went peacefully to their graves, ignorant of my atheism. The fire & brimstone upbringing my mom went through she rejected and embraced the milder Presbyterianism of my dad's family (my Dad rejected even that). My mom's faith is very vague, liberal and private, so luckily it's not an issue for us. She thinks my atheism is mistaken but she doesn't fear my going to hell, either. Good luck to you.
the normal response to "you're never going to convince me blah blah blah" is "okay bye." Since there would be no further point of conversation between the two parties, but I have no idea what to do when it's your mother...
I'm glad that it all went down so well, perhaps as best as could be expected but it must be clear that you should stop trying to explain any further, as it will not achieve anything. The subject could well be dropped now and you can lead the life that you deserve to live, knowing that she accepts your position.
You handled this brilliantly so far, it's rare to see someone go as far as this and as well as this in this short a time. Nicely done.
Your mum's generic responses will never likley change, it's not worth forcing that particular issue. Simply let the differences of opinion lay unless she asks for your opinion.
In any case just remember to keep your cool, (not always easy to do as it may sound)
Shwanerd...all you can really do is tell your mom that you respect her opinion and her belief but this is one thing that we will have to agree to disagree on, tell her you have no desire to make her mind, you just want her to understand why you have you opinion and that you hope she can accept that fact you don't share her beliefs, then give her a big hug and tell her you love her!
Family is like that. You don't try to change them. You just love them, but live your life. It's frustrating, but it's the best course. Wish I had some great advice that would make it all come out like you want it to, but I don't think there is any. at least, I don't have it.
Must be frustrating to hear all that. When I hear someone say "I believe because it makes me feel good" or "nothing you can say will change my mind" I say in reply that I want my beliefs to be as in line with reality as possible so what feels good is irrelevant to that and not listen is closed-minded and gets me no where.
I think it shouldn't be a problem if that's what she thinks as long as she doesn't try to talk to you about it because she has shown she'll only be talking at you.
I think maybe you should get to the point where you don't talk about the sticking points. If she doesnt care about the real facts, she doesn't care. It's not your problem. The main thing is she accepts your decision.
Cool you have a job? Where do you work at? Anyway, I'm glad you are out. I'm sort of out about my religion myself but I can't flat out tell my parents I'm pagan but I know they know but anyway, are you still living at home? The bedroom in the background looks different.
It's been over 2 years that I have been an atheist, and still my husband refuses to consider that his religious views may be in error. He doesn't care about evidence either. It seems to me he is worried mainly that I will burn in hell for my apostasy! I don't insist on talking to him about it. Every now and then, I throw in a casual remark to stir up his thinking. Frustrating? Gads, yes. I can't tell you how much. Once you figure it out, it's a crazymaker when those you love won't see.
You should walk in my shoes. If you think two yrs is tough, try 44 yrs of waiting for your loved ones to 'see' the truth. Good thing my kids and wife are ok with it but not too many others around me have figured out the delusion of sky daddy worship. My wife was a tough one to deconvert but slowly and with some mild prodding, over 30 yrs, she finally 'sees'.
Saxmanchiro: I envy that you've been the captain of your own ship for 44 years.You know how it works: as a christian, you are constantly examining your conscience, doing your penance, trying to trick your brain into thinking the bible has no contradictions....aargh. Finally I'm free of the nuttiness. Mentally, it's been 2 years of unfettered bliss! But if it takes him 30 years to listen, he'll be 90, and probably won't remember why he should care! Hah! What about hypnosis? :OP
Thanks for the envy. I must say, I have been very thankful for my blissful yrs without sky daddy looking over my shoulder.
As to your dilemma, I would suggest(if he likes to read) any books by Dawkins or Dennett or Sam Harris. If his conviction is strong and he won't listen to contradictory information to his delusional stance, you have a tough fight ahead. It is possible to have a wonderful relationship but just think how fantastic it could be if he joined the truthful side of the fence.
Yes, I will try that..sort of leave that kind of book laying around, tho he would rather watch football, ugh. I imagine how great it would be just to be able to talk to someone of like mind in this conservative, fundamental christian, redneck town that I live in, where a common sentiment heard on the street is *praise jesus!*. It can be distressing. But I try not to take anything too personally, and I love to laugh, so I try to do it often. Even at myself. I'm grateful for internet atheists!
i became an atheist when i was 15 and i grew up in a super religious household. i was totally persecuted on a regular basis for my rejection of my parents fanatical religious beliefs. i know exactly how you must feel. it's hard, but hang in there.
I've known people who were disowned because of the conversation you had. She accepts you, so that is a plus. You are in the same situation I've been in with my mother for years. I found that a good responce to "It doesn't matter" ot "that doesn't change the fact that.." is "Well, to me, it does matter. To me, it does change things. Until you understand why, you'll never understand me. " It may help. but all in all, I'm glad she accepts and stil loves you. it's a plus.
I'm happy you are not having to lead a double life. One thing you've done is open a window of doubt for your mother. Don't expect her to deconvert and don't put the pressure on, you know how that feels.
Your mom just found out you are not the son she thought she raised. She's probably walking around feeling like she has a hot dagger through her chest. She says she loves you and accepts you no matter what. That's central. Keep the channels of communication open. Make sure you tell her how much you love her.
The debate about theism and evolution is marginal. If she feels you are trying to convert her she will be frustrated, just as you would be.
I got the same problem with my mom. I just pretend I care and pretend to play along even though she knows what I am.
I don't try to talk about her when we're on such topics. My dad's an agnostic, but he also want my mom to be happy with her fantasies, so he pretends to be listening when she starts preaching. I do the same.
You can't argue with someone who believes based on faith. Faith is insidious and denies people basic reasoning skills. I really fear people who consider Faith a virtue.
well beside it's not a "fact", of course it doesn't change the probability of being a deity. It just proves that the Bible is wrong(man made or mistaken about something). As simple as that.
I had to draw the line in the sand like that with my father. Religion and politics are banned from discussion. I school his ignorant ass if he even tries to open his mouth about either one.
Your frustration's personally understood and I--and I'm sure a lot of others here who follow you--sympathize with you. It's ridiculously hard to deal with family members, or friends, who are like your mother.
You can't call it Faith, and say it's a Proven Fact, or else it wouldn't be Faith. But then I guess they would say the Dictionary's definition of "Faith" is wrong, too.
Create a dummy youtube account. If she gets pissed at you having an opinion (or rather, accepting the facts), mothers will try and get you to delete the account. So, delete the dummy account. But make sure to put up a "believable" fight.
wait... you are "outed" as an... athiest? I wnt around a catholic school making fun of the stupid religious fanatics. It's not like you came out as gay or something... is it as bad in america? wtf is wrong with your country?
thats what worries me too, that its such ashame over in the west they actually have to worry about their parents finding out they're an atheist, and that kids, like Shwa, have had to keep it "in the closet". Its so strange since I live in an open minded country .__.;;;
But still, I'm just happy for you Shwa that the time has now come, where you have at least dropped hints to her. Even if she still reacts like that way you said she does, it's better than flipping her lid and kicking you out.
In some parts of America it can be real bad. This kid was sent to Jesus camp every summer. Eeew! He has lived his life surrounded by and raised by fundies!!! Furthermore he is still young and financially dependent on his fundie parents.
oh, i forgot how badly he was indoctrinated by the fundies. well, i have heard my dad's thoughts on homosexuals, so i have kept certain things away from him, at least until i am financially independent.
You shouldn't be frustrated or disappointed in ANY way. It's done. Over. Out in the open, mostly. Your mother sounds fine. She obviously doesn't think you're going to Hell. She accepts you as you are and will always love you. Now you must tell her that you accept her as she is and no way will you love her one bit less, or try to change her, but, she must accept that if she is going to talk religion at you, you will talk reason back. If neither of you preach all will be fine. Well done. :)
Good job! You've planted the seed of doubt because now she has to face this in her home and hopefully it takes root! The constant "it doesn't matter" is her own defense mechanism, it's not meant to challenge you I don't think. Did you tell your father? Can he offer you any advice?
I'm a few years older than you, I don't live at home, and from my experience, it's better to not ever talk about science or religion, with these people. If you take your life too seriously, you'll wind up writing your mother off, like I do for at least 6 months to a year at a time after having religious conversations with my nutter father. Dealing with the willfully stupid can become a full-time job, especially if it's a family member. It's like having a retarded child, quite literally. GL&HF.
In my case, the answer was always "it doesn't matter honey, Jesus loves you anyway." there really is nothing to say to that. Wash your hands and walk away. Glad things are just at that level and not as bad as it could have been. Good luck.
Be patient... It took me over 10 years to deconvert my parents, and even now they hold to an agnostic point of view. My advice to you would be to not force the issue, but don't shy away from your view point when the conversations come up. Be real, but non confrontational about your views. And when your more fundamentalist family members start in on you, play a fun game of labeling the logical phallacy. If nothing else, it will frustrate them into leaving the topic alone.
Before I even knew the word atheist, I asked my mom why can God always has/is/will be etc, and why not the universe or existence in general? Because we can observe and test the known universe? After that she seemed to have gotten the point and the subject dropped.
his mother shouldnt be upset for his lack of a belief in god, thats just retarded
hes into creationism because he likes seeing how retarded creationists sound so he can refute them and completely destroy their arguments and stop the spread of false knowledge
She took it much better than I expected, you're not undercover anymore though...I'm thinking she might try to bring some christian apologetic to your house to convert you back, but its just speculation on my part. You did well man :)
Yea when I started out this same conversation with my Mom I just started out by explaining that I do not believe in the supernatural and evolution was something we did not even talk about.
When my wife told her Mom she acted like she did not care but started asking questions and one of them was "Well if evolution is true than why are there still monkeys?" than every question she asked after that was on the similar line of intelligence.
I think your mom is actually a pretty representative sample of most believers out there. They were raised believing it, it makes them feel good and that's that.
If you really want to make a change in your mom (and you did not say you did) then be more loving to her than you have in the past. She will not only realize you are still the good person you knew you to be but she might also suspect your "staying in the closet" was hurting your relationship and she may not be as inclined to try to pull you back.
That doesn't sound too bad. Your mum sounds quite reasonable compared to my parents - when I first started asking questions their reaction was to get super-mad, send me to extra Islamic fiqh classes after school/weekends and restricting internet access so I wouldn't get 'corrupted' by evil influences. Hasn't worked though. :D
Yeah, that's the way it works. You will be talking to a wall forever unless something clicks in her mind and she finally crosses over the threshold where she can actually think about the topic rationally. I'm in the same situation with my mother, but as I am in college and live 5 hours away it's probably much easier. We had some hardcore arguments about it a long time ago and now it's just something we don't mention. Eventually she'll either come around or leave it alone.
It also sounds to me like she thinks you're just expressing doubt, but has "faith" you'll come back into the fold. Until you categorically lay it on the line that you're an atheist, she won't get the gist of what you're trying to tell her, and will only continue tiptoeing around the important problems you throw at her about Christianity in respect to its conflicts with all things of reality.
"She believes what she believes because it feels good."
A statement like that means that the truth is not what is most important to them. But with her, at least she loves you no matter what. That's more then some would say.
Everything u say, she's probably going to view it as a attack from satan... etc. Her worldview probably causes her to have her guard up against nonbelievers. It's sad but true.
Anyway, for me "coming out" didn't really affect anything. I suppose my attitude was "atheist"since childhood so it didn't really surprise anyone. Grandma's responses were the best - I still laught when I think of them.
Then again fundamentalism isn't big around here - at least it's not very visible. Well, most of the time.
Just try to live as normal - after all, you haven't really changed at all. In fact, you were only honest.
Yeah, no point in trying to convert her. Like most christians the "god wall" comes up when evidence and reason are presented. It's very frustrating. Best thing to do is simply slide the facts into conversations, but don't force the issues.
First, I'm noticing a lot of comments here saying "don't convert your mom." Perhaps none of these people noticed, but Shwa wasn't trying to convert his mother, she just took it that way. Don't get confused with that.
second, I'm really glad it's going so well for you man. It's probably could have gone much worse, and it may yet get worse for you. Don't be a stranger if you ever wanna catch up or talk, eh?
My mum says the exact same thing but when she says stuff like it doesnt matter its because it gets to her, well thats why in my case, you can see sometimes in her face thats something just clicked.
Try not saying its about god existing, its about whether god did what the bible says. I find that tends to get through the armor around the brain they have. Start from a point that god is real and then show that he didnt do X as it says in the bible.
Wow....my mom is the same exact way, she says its all about faith and I sadly dont have faith and nothin I can say will ever change her mind. So I know exactly how you feel, me I just leave or stop the conversation. Besides I never try and convince her, I just try and tell her why I am an atheist [like you] and Iv told her I think the deity of the bible is immoral and my morals are superior right to her face. We just dont ever talk about it anymore. Anyway, I know how you feel.
Also my mom says it doesnt matter. In fact when we went and saw The reaping, Russell talked about it on TAE on Strawmanning atheist. One part of the movie and Russell mnentioned thisw part as well, the strawman atheist, immediately comes up with natural ways to explain the 10 plagues, and my mom turned to me and whispered even if that is true doesnt mean god didnt do it. Which is ture becuase its none falsifiable, but which is most logical? In the movie it was just bias speculation. ie strawman
I'm sorry to hear your upbringing was so harsh with regards to indoctrination. I grew up religious, but it was never forced on me in the way it's so often forced on other people.
*hugs* Well, the great thing is that she said she loves you no matter what. Better reaction than I got when I cam out as trans to my mom.
It's very interesting that, in some places and families, even religious ones, there is no "coming out". Some one living in the middle of Boston Mass would get a reaction from friends like, "Yeah and?"
Indoctrinated by science? By this does she mean, listening to logic? Your mom at least seems like a good person. I'm glad you got the chance to talk to her. I'll bet it feels great to have gotten a few things off your chest. From what you've told us, I think she knows where you stand on the matter.
Leave your mother be in her belief. Really let her be she is one of the ones that probably never will change. If she then so!
As long as you know how to do get your own life on your feet. And you know she remains to stay family. It never will be easy but accepting each other on a basic human level is nice yes.
It doesn't matter if your mom agrees with you. And if she is a wotm person there isn't a snowballs chance in hell you are going to change her mind. At least she isn't sending you have to a pshyc ward like one of friend was over not being religious.
It must be a relief to see that she doesn't freak out and that you no longer need to hide a part of yourself from her. I'm glad that it works out for you!
Stand your ground but try to stick to the things you have in common as well so she knows you havent really changed as a persob. Your never going to convert her now, people just get hardwired to think a certain way.
write a list of all the things that she says that dont matter. keep it going till you get a good size list than show it to her. for each thing that dont matter to her give a reason why it should matter. a big list like that may open her eyes on how closed minded shes being about this. just a thought
AntEyeTheist is right, family matters much more than getting her to understand.
bi50kenner 5 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
Whether you "believe" in God or not is not the point.
discoverytime1 11 months ago
I agree there's alot of bad stuff in religion, and I backed away from it for the same reasons as you, but most christians dont like everything in the bible. They have a right to have their opinions. Alot of the time they cant accept anything else because theyre scared of what else lies beyond.
CJbass420 1 year ago
FUCK YOU!!!
GARRISONthe69er 1 year ago
well everything evolves, everyone knows that, but that doesnt disp......" then you were interrupted by the phone. does that mean your mom at least accepts evolution?
superdruid999 1 year ago
Hey, I hope things are ok with this situation. You'll probably find that some people don't really care whether something is true or not, it doesn't really bother them. That's not just religious folks, I know plenty of atheists who don't really care either, it doesn't really bother them what is true. Personally, I find it massively important, and it seems you do too.
My mum believes in astrology, no matter how many times we talk about it I know I will never convince her she's wrong.
pezzamange 1 year ago
It's been said that you can't reason someone out of a position they didn't use reason to arrive at... consequently there's really no way to talk sense to most religious people, they typically believe it because of indoctrination or desperation, neither of which involve rational thinking.
ruin3r 2 years ago
This has been flagged as spam show
Garry Habermas debate with Antony Flew on the issue " did Jesus rise from the dead ?"
a professional debate judge who was asked to evaluate the debate concludes
the historical evidence , though flawed , is strong enough to lead reasonable minds to conclude that Christ did indeed rise from the dead .... Habermas dose end up providing "highly probably evidence" for the historicity of the resurrection " with no plausible naturalistic evidence against it"
valu777 2 years ago
Beliefs are a dime a dozen, but you've only got one mom. Agree to disagree, relate to each other in love, and stay away from religious topics in conversation. From what you have relayed to your viewers: she has not disowned you, she still shows unconditional love for you, and she is still your mom. Believe me, the situation could be far worse for you than it is. Ask yourself, "Do I want to be right, or do I want to be happy?" Just my two cents.
M0US3P0T4TO 2 years ago
Just believe and shut up with all the questions.
If you could resason with religious people there would be no religious people.
AntEyeTheist 2 years ago 7
and one more thing, Granted you and I have different religious beliefs, but if you need to talk, feel free to let me know.
dumoktheartist 2 years ago
Coming out is never an easy thing to do. When I came out to members of my family as a pagan, It was easier in some ways and slightly more difficult in others. I would suggest that at this point not to deconvert your mom, but rather say something along the lines of "This is what I believe and why but I respect your right to disagree." Remember that respect is a two way street. I'll be keeping you in my thoughts.
dumoktheartist 2 years ago
i'm going through the same thing with my mum lol.
pensego 2 years ago
HAHA, WAY OF THE MASTER! I had to watch that stupid shit! waste of my time, however at that point I was falling for it. Good gracious!
iAurora 2 years ago
The most important thing is that she is willing to talk about it, even if it is like talking to a wall. I would say give it a few years. Right now you're still very much in a parent-child relationship, so probably it's hard for her to take the things you're saying entirely seriously, 'cause you're still her little baby. Once you're on a more equal adult-adult footing she may be more willing to open her mind a little. At least, that's how it went for me and my parents. Good luck!
ahyane 2 years ago
Wow your brave buddy, I would never tell my bible thumping parents that I'm an atheist... They would write me right out of their will if I did...
^..^
TheWildAssCopyCat 2 years ago
I went through these same discussions with my grandmother, and I know the blank look they give when a rational position is explained. She eventually stopped trying to convince me of god.
The Thanksgiving dinner prayers also stopped when my brother and I were present. I guess the family tired of the tension and arguments that were promted by the prayers.
ATHEISTIQ 2 years ago
I agree with Darrel Ray on this one. It is not possible to use logic with those who are already committed fundamentalists; it's a waste of time. You should try ignoring the religious stuff completely and only acknowledge the human aspects.
anthonzi 2 years ago
ya did good bro.
ghostdog564 2 years ago
Stop worrying about your mother. She will always love you.
KlipKultur4 2 years ago
I;m proud of you.
PrinceBishop3 2 years ago
Be wary of the possibility that your mother installs spyware on your computer or something. She might want to know where you are getting these heretical ideas.
Feldmm1 2 years ago
...Let her have her beliefs, they may not be right, but it doesn't seem like she is trying to convert you back, right now, you are just bitching, I mean if she doesn't really care then why does it matter? How is you trying to make her be an atheist any better than them trying to convert us? you are pretty much evangelizing for atheists, and i can't stand evangelists. jusdt because your beliefs are correct, doesn't mean your actions are always right.
rooroo12345678 2 years ago
I'm so glad it went well after all :D! And I had no idea you had been in a hell house etc.. when you were younger.. whoa. Good you got to talk about it with her, finally.
labrat882 2 years ago
yeah these don't matter is what makes me angry from my parents whenever i go into such a conversation..
grade1981 2 years ago
hang in there, hope it evrything works out
stjimmy933499399493 2 years ago
Don't try to argue with your mom, man. I know it's a lot of drama right now, but it's got to be a big relief to have your secret out in the open. It's got a to be a big surprise for her, a lot to absorb. Give her time to come to terms with it. And maybe right now she's very defensive, but the fact that she's willing to at least listen is a big positive step. After a while, she'll start to understand more of where you're coming from, even if she never gets there herself. That;s cool, too.
roentgen571 2 years ago 2
Honey, I think this is the best cause scenario for you. She is not openly hostile, and you are only responsible for who you are, and what you believe.
Besides the truth is still the truth, even if she will not listen to it. I know it hurts, and I know it sucks, but some people are just too stuck in her ways.
lessergnome 2 years ago
Dude -
1) Don't feel you need to debate the issue or "prove her wrong". She seems well aware of your position and you need not justify yourself and it seems she is not asking you to.
2. Allow her her beliefs as you would expect others to respect yours. Many Christians, especially the devout and dogmatic ones can be surprisingly insecure about their faith. They seek reinforcement from others and greatly fear or resent contrary positions. They are afraid of losing their faith.
sweetsweatyfeet 2 years ago
Dude ... you're story and situation right now is EXACTLY where I am now and the same responses from my mom
jonbej 2 years ago
Congrats! I'm happy to hear your parents are accepting of your lack of belief. I hope things only get better from here.
freedom0f5peech 2 years ago
Many people are religious. If she got her religion from her family who will she most likely listen too?
In here you find a lot of people who share your opinion.
74Charm 2 years ago
About fucking time you drop some balls!
Honestly, it's not like you're gay or something. She should be glad.
exo0O 2 years ago
i'm so glad i didn't have to go through all this sh*t, being born into highly secularized scandinavia, in a non-religious family. listening to stuff like this reminds me more of the middle east than the last super power of the world, a highly industrialized country, not one ranking along with the developing world. mentally maybe, it's still developing.
sp00x 2 years ago
and yes. you're outta canada. i know. i'm just not entirely awake, obviously. :D
sp00x 2 years ago
As an atheist son of a devout christian mother one thing to remember, your relationship comes first so let the little things slide. You don't need to win every battle, or argue every point. I'm not saying you will or are just from my experience the wilful ignorance can get to you. Some things you may need to take a stand on but this is your mother and fighting over her imaginary friend is not worth it. I'm not saying back down, just pick your fights.
sooperdude24 2 years ago 6
good advice.
1casey1brady1 2 years ago
what about your dad?
mickdornfad 2 years ago
Im proud of you man for telling her.
devtamagi 2 years ago
UofT, represent.
Phibins 2 years ago
A little advice...leave it alone! I commend you for coming out. I don't think anyone should pretend to be something they aren't, and be a fake ass. So, cudos on the fact that you have refused to play the hypocrite. However, I have had these same discussions with my grandmother for over two years now with very, very, few positive results. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink! Do what you want, but be prepared to deal with lots of stubborness. Good luck and congratulations!
AmGoDDoGmA 2 years ago
I'll leave the key under the doormat....
ReverendAtomSmasher 2 years ago
It takes a lot of brass tacks to come out whilst living at home. Congratulations, I know the road will be tough for a while but it will get much easier. Coming out as atheist was so much harder for me than coming out as gay.
GoMetricToday 2 years ago
Congrats and sympathy. My mom had a similar reaction, sort of.
DancingRabbit52 2 years ago
Good luck, James.
ashaman72 2 years ago
You should tell her that to some people raping others feels good so they shouldn't stop it either.
Durakken 2 years ago
Don´t be frustrated, that´s just a parent thing: they always think they know better than their child does!
kirafan68 2 years ago
Feels good mom
subcoolfl 2 years ago
Good for you.
We all have one of those "nothing you say will change my mind" in our families, so don't sweat it.
I always try to find out who's more open to listening to some of the arguments against religion as a whole and slowly plant some seeds of thought, if you will.
AncientLie 2 years ago
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MDzyne 2 years ago
i fear the day when my parents discover i don't associate with Isms.JV
jvforever72 2 years ago
Think about it this way: you were worried what would happen if your family ever found out that you're an atheist. Your mom found out and the world is still spinning on its axis. :p
The fact that your mom has already come to the "I want you to know that I still love you" means that she's probably more flexible than you originally thought. Don't expect your mom to come around quickly - but it sounds like she may see your perspective in about 5-10 years. Be patient.
LilithMaura 2 years ago
Same situation as me. I dont think my mom will ever leave her faith. There is not enough curiosity/ability from her side to ever absorb an actual proof/logical argument.
I have told her that if I am ever woken up at judgement day I will not deny that Jesus is the son of God. That makes her calm.
CognosSquare 2 years ago
Continue to follow your story with interest, thanks for the update. Both of my grandmothers went peacefully to their graves, ignorant of my atheism. The fire & brimstone upbringing my mom went through she rejected and embraced the milder Presbyterianism of my dad's family (my Dad rejected even that). My mom's faith is very vague, liberal and private, so luckily it's not an issue for us. She thinks my atheism is mistaken but she doesn't fear my going to hell, either. Good luck to you.
JJR93 2 years ago
the normal response to "you're never going to convince me blah blah blah" is "okay bye." Since there would be no further point of conversation between the two parties, but I have no idea what to do when it's your mother...
wakeangel2001 2 years ago
hey good job, this is encouraging. Maybe you can explain some stuff to her.
Did you see my crimestop video? This is exactly what she's doing.
ubergossen 2 years ago
SO - you no longer have to attend church. Good.
I'm glad that it all went down so well, perhaps as best as could be expected but it must be clear that you should stop trying to explain any further, as it will not achieve anything. The subject could well be dropped now and you can lead the life that you deserve to live, knowing that she accepts your position.
CheesesPeaks2U 2 years ago
Feels good man. -facedesk-
Raimakusa 2 years ago
You handled this brilliantly so far, it's rare to see someone go as far as this and as well as this in this short a time. Nicely done.
Your mum's generic responses will never likley change, it's not worth forcing that particular issue. Simply let the differences of opinion lay unless she asks for your opinion.
In any case just remember to keep your cool, (not always easy to do as it may sound)
bloodyrediron 2 years ago
Shwanerd, you said your mom said "I beleive it because it feels good"
I ahve had someone say that exact same thing too me....I told them "So does masturbation should we make a religion out of that?
I realize you cannot say that too your mom. Just wanted to share the experiance lol
mnewf2002 2 years ago
Good luck with this, Shwa. I can understand how tough it can be with the family...
spacecataz1663 2 years ago
There is an atheist group on Oshawa? wish I knew about them
vesman81 2 years ago
Shwanerd...all you can really do is tell your mom that you respect her opinion and her belief but this is one thing that we will have to agree to disagree on, tell her you have no desire to make her mind, you just want her to understand why you have you opinion and that you hope she can accept that fact you don't share her beliefs, then give her a big hug and tell her you love her!
AbdultheImpailler 2 years ago
Congrats
JRBendixen 2 years ago
OF THUNDERf00T! THE GRAMMAR! THE LACK OF PUNCTUATION! IT BURRRRRNS!
BrightRaven0 2 years ago
Family is like that. You don't try to change them. You just love them, but live your life. It's frustrating, but it's the best course. Wish I had some great advice that would make it all come out like you want it to, but I don't think there is any. at least, I don't have it.
AncientAtheist 2 years ago
Must be frustrating to hear all that. When I hear someone say "I believe because it makes me feel good" or "nothing you can say will change my mind" I say in reply that I want my beliefs to be as in line with reality as possible so what feels good is irrelevant to that and not listen is closed-minded and gets me no where.
I think it shouldn't be a problem if that's what she thinks as long as she doesn't try to talk to you about it because she has shown she'll only be talking at you.
CriticalAtheist 2 years ago
Some people will never change their views on their faith. This is a certainty, if there is any, in life.
lucidatheist 2 years ago
Goodluck shwanerd! hope for the best
mathmexican4234 2 years ago
Dear mom - You beleive that god has a plan? He will show himself to me when He thinks it's time.
jacobromu 2 years ago
Well! May the Force be with you! :)
BionicDance 2 years ago 2
Has your dad come out also?
lifeisfair123 2 years ago
I'm proud of you SN. Keep on truckin bro.
Ryansarcade9 2 years ago
I think maybe you should get to the point where you don't talk about the sticking points. If she doesnt care about the real facts, she doesn't care. It's not your problem. The main thing is she accepts your decision.
Brianswers 2 years ago
Cool you have a job? Where do you work at? Anyway, I'm glad you are out. I'm sort of out about my religion myself but I can't flat out tell my parents I'm pagan but I know they know but anyway, are you still living at home? The bedroom in the background looks different.
PrincessKLS 2 years ago
Remember ShwaNerd, you cannot deconvert you mother, only she can deconvert herself. Just be there to help and support her.
Cheers
bricksmarlen 2 years ago
It's been over 2 years that I have been an atheist, and still my husband refuses to consider that his religious views may be in error. He doesn't care about evidence either. It seems to me he is worried mainly that I will burn in hell for my apostasy! I don't insist on talking to him about it. Every now and then, I throw in a casual remark to stir up his thinking. Frustrating? Gads, yes. I can't tell you how much. Once you figure it out, it's a crazymaker when those you love won't see.
8journey8 2 years ago
8journey8
You should walk in my shoes. If you think two yrs is tough, try 44 yrs of waiting for your loved ones to 'see' the truth. Good thing my kids and wife are ok with it but not too many others around me have figured out the delusion of sky daddy worship. My wife was a tough one to deconvert but slowly and with some mild prodding, over 30 yrs, she finally 'sees'.
saxmanchiro 2 years ago
Saxmanchiro: I envy that you've been the captain of your own ship for 44 years.You know how it works: as a christian, you are constantly examining your conscience, doing your penance, trying to trick your brain into thinking the bible has no contradictions....aargh. Finally I'm free of the nuttiness. Mentally, it's been 2 years of unfettered bliss! But if it takes him 30 years to listen, he'll be 90, and probably won't remember why he should care! Hah! What about hypnosis? :OP
8journey8 2 years ago
Thanks for the envy. I must say, I have been very thankful for my blissful yrs without sky daddy looking over my shoulder.
As to your dilemma, I would suggest(if he likes to read) any books by Dawkins or Dennett or Sam Harris. If his conviction is strong and he won't listen to contradictory information to his delusional stance, you have a tough fight ahead. It is possible to have a wonderful relationship but just think how fantastic it could be if he joined the truthful side of the fence.
saxmanchiro 2 years ago
Yes, I will try that..sort of leave that kind of book laying around, tho he would rather watch football, ugh. I imagine how great it would be just to be able to talk to someone of like mind in this conservative, fundamental christian, redneck town that I live in, where a common sentiment heard on the street is *praise jesus!*. It can be distressing. But I try not to take anything too personally, and I love to laugh, so I try to do it often. Even at myself. I'm grateful for internet atheists!
8journey8 2 years ago
i became an atheist when i was 15 and i grew up in a super religious household. i was totally persecuted on a regular basis for my rejection of my parents fanatical religious beliefs. i know exactly how you must feel. it's hard, but hang in there.
outsidervisionary 2 years ago
I've known people who were disowned because of the conversation you had. She accepts you, so that is a plus. You are in the same situation I've been in with my mother for years. I found that a good responce to "It doesn't matter" ot "that doesn't change the fact that.." is "Well, to me, it does matter. To me, it does change things. Until you understand why, you'll never understand me. " It may help. but all in all, I'm glad she accepts and stil loves you. it's a plus.
OccamsRazors 2 years ago
I'm happy you are not having to lead a double life. One thing you've done is open a window of doubt for your mother. Don't expect her to deconvert and don't put the pressure on, you know how that feels.
yellowlabrador 2 years ago
Your mom just found out you are not the son she thought she raised. She's probably walking around feeling like she has a hot dagger through her chest. She says she loves you and accepts you no matter what. That's central. Keep the channels of communication open. Make sure you tell her how much you love her.
The debate about theism and evolution is marginal. If she feels you are trying to convert her she will be frustrated, just as you would be.
It's a new relationship. Everyone needs time.
kevinanity 2 years ago
Wow, Shwa's mom sounds really uneducated.
KillcrazeWoW 2 years ago
well done hang in there! its the first step
3lectricMonk 2 years ago
you tell her, young canuck!
AshesWasHerName 2 years ago
at leat she accep[ts you. thats the important thing.
JacobDeadman 2 years ago
I got the same problem with my mom. I just pretend I care and pretend to play along even though she knows what I am.
I don't try to talk about her when we're on such topics. My dad's an agnostic, but he also want my mom to be happy with her fantasies, so he pretends to be listening when she starts preaching. I do the same.
amig90 2 years ago
Hang in there.
mtsac1 2 years ago
You can't argue with someone who believes based on faith. Faith is insidious and denies people basic reasoning skills. I really fear people who consider Faith a virtue.
Alexius314 2 years ago
"It doesn't change the fact that there is a God",
well beside it's not a "fact", of course it doesn't change the probability of being a deity. It just proves that the Bible is wrong(man made or mistaken about something). As simple as that.
canerdc 2 years ago
I had to draw the line in the sand like that with my father. Religion and politics are banned from discussion. I school his ignorant ass if he even tries to open his mouth about either one.
bamboo4tameshigiri 2 years ago 3
Your frustration's personally understood and I--and I'm sure a lot of others here who follow you--sympathize with you. It's ridiculously hard to deal with family members, or friends, who are like your mother.
You can't call it Faith, and say it's a Proven Fact, or else it wouldn't be Faith. But then I guess they would say the Dictionary's definition of "Faith" is wrong, too.
AbyssalLyrist 2 years ago
I agree totally with philhellenes. It's good that this has come out sooner rather than later.
1140Cecile 2 years ago
Create a dummy youtube account. If she gets pissed at you having an opinion (or rather, accepting the facts), mothers will try and get you to delete the account. So, delete the dummy account. But make sure to put up a "believable" fight.
IdleGod 2 years ago
indoctorinated by science........ what, indoctrination, by, REALITY...Holy Shit, i feel like such an idiot now, blindly following observable reality.
GearsofFate101 2 years ago
sir, on behalf of the internet i must regretfully inform you to STFU, GTFO and take your FAIL with you.
BrightRaven0 2 years ago
wait... you are "outed" as an... athiest? I wnt around a catholic school making fun of the stupid religious fanatics. It's not like you came out as gay or something... is it as bad in america? wtf is wrong with your country?
BrightRaven0 2 years ago
thats what worries me too, that its such ashame over in the west they actually have to worry about their parents finding out they're an atheist, and that kids, like Shwa, have had to keep it "in the closet". Its so strange since I live in an open minded country .__.;;;
But still, I'm just happy for you Shwa that the time has now come, where you have at least dropped hints to her. Even if she still reacts like that way you said she does, it's better than flipping her lid and kicking you out.
NikiPaprika 2 years ago
In some parts of America it can be real bad. This kid was sent to Jesus camp every summer. Eeew! He has lived his life surrounded by and raised by fundies!!! Furthermore he is still young and financially dependent on his fundie parents.
insightnew 2 years ago
oh, i forgot how badly he was indoctrinated by the fundies. well, i have heard my dad's thoughts on homosexuals, so i have kept certain things away from him, at least until i am financially independent.
BrightRaven0 2 years ago
You shouldn't be frustrated or disappointed in ANY way. It's done. Over. Out in the open, mostly. Your mother sounds fine. She obviously doesn't think you're going to Hell. She accepts you as you are and will always love you. Now you must tell her that you accept her as she is and no way will you love her one bit less, or try to change her, but, she must accept that if she is going to talk religion at you, you will talk reason back. If neither of you preach all will be fine. Well done. :)
philhellenes 2 years ago 2
Good job! You've planted the seed of doubt because now she has to face this in her home and hopefully it takes root! The constant "it doesn't matter" is her own defense mechanism, it's not meant to challenge you I don't think. Did you tell your father? Can he offer you any advice?
timbobos 2 years ago
I'm a few years older than you, I don't live at home, and from my experience, it's better to not ever talk about science or religion, with these people. If you take your life too seriously, you'll wind up writing your mother off, like I do for at least 6 months to a year at a time after having religious conversations with my nutter father. Dealing with the willfully stupid can become a full-time job, especially if it's a family member. It's like having a retarded child, quite literally. GL&HF.
FallenAngel0fDoom 2 years ago
In my case, the answer was always "it doesn't matter honey, Jesus loves you anyway." there really is nothing to say to that. Wash your hands and walk away. Glad things are just at that level and not as bad as it could have been. Good luck.
EloquentiaSerpentis 2 years ago
Be patient... It took me over 10 years to deconvert my parents, and even now they hold to an agnostic point of view. My advice to you would be to not force the issue, but don't shy away from your view point when the conversations come up. Be real, but non confrontational about your views. And when your more fundamentalist family members start in on you, play a fun game of labeling the logical phallacy. If nothing else, it will frustrate them into leaving the topic alone.
JebusBad 2 years ago
I bet thats a huge weight off your shoulders!
I'm glad she's pretty ok with it, and the more fundi side of the family need not know.
I'm happy for you mate
dugges 2 years ago
His channel says "Debating Creationism." L 2 read.
100119 2 years ago
grats dude must be a hell of a weight off ur shoulders!
NoPlanB616 2 years ago
Before I even knew the word atheist, I asked my mom why can God always has/is/will be etc, and why not the universe or existence in general? Because we can observe and test the known universe? After that she seemed to have gotten the point and the subject dropped.
Brewhahh 2 years ago
and im glad for you Shwanerd, happy ur finally out, hope things go well with the family
dhcrazy333 2 years ago
his mother shouldnt be upset for his lack of a belief in god, thats just retarded
hes into creationism because he likes seeing how retarded creationists sound so he can refute them and completely destroy their arguments and stop the spread of false knowledge
dhcrazy333 2 years ago
HELLOWEEN!
100119 2 years ago
It says debating creationism on his channel.
whyness 2 years ago
You should also demand sovereignty on Sunday mornings.
spikesmth 2 years ago
If she tells you science "doesn't matter" then turns around and claims bible on you... just say "The Bible Doesn't Matter!"
At least you're not at risk of being shunned by your family like some poor kids out there.
spikesmth 2 years ago
I'm glad you're out. It's really a shame that it's such a bothersome/ risky thing to do... It really shouldn't be. Good luck man!
UmbrellaAl 2 years ago
She took it much better than I expected, you're not undercover anymore though...I'm thinking she might try to bring some christian apologetic to your house to convert you back, but its just speculation on my part. You did well man :)
TurboDally 2 years ago
Wow.. she takes it rather well!
Congrats man. :-)
Vogter2100 2 years ago
Iv been waiting for this moment for a while haha
CropDuster33 2 years ago
Yea when I started out this same conversation with my Mom I just started out by explaining that I do not believe in the supernatural and evolution was something we did not even talk about.
When my wife told her Mom she acted like she did not care but started asking questions and one of them was "Well if evolution is true than why are there still monkeys?" than every question she asked after that was on the similar line of intelligence.
flammamancer 2 years ago
Man, good for you!
CropDuster33 2 years ago
I think your mom is actually a pretty representative sample of most believers out there. They were raised believing it, it makes them feel good and that's that.
ArranoGris 2 years ago
Sounds like your mom is insecure in her beliefs and knows it.
ArranoGris 2 years ago
Time to call the atheist experience again
Xenithan 2 years ago 4
Like talking to a wall, huh? Don't forget that wall gave birth to you! :)
mytubemedia567 2 years ago
Holy cow, congratulations man.
adamredwine 2 years ago
If you really want to make a change in your mom (and you did not say you did) then be more loving to her than you have in the past. She will not only realize you are still the good person you knew you to be but she might also suspect your "staying in the closet" was hurting your relationship and she may not be as inclined to try to pull you back.
prodigyat9 2 years ago
I duth think the lady protests to much
AsifVidios 2 years ago
You CAME OUT!... and also told your parents you were an Atheist? Big week. ; )
NewtonsStudent 2 years ago 3
That doesn't sound too bad. Your mum sounds quite reasonable compared to my parents - when I first started asking questions their reaction was to get super-mad, send me to extra Islamic fiqh classes after school/weekends and restricting internet access so I wouldn't get 'corrupted' by evil influences. Hasn't worked though. :D
weaselsfromhell 2 years ago
You should have telled her first that you're gay. Then just after that: Hey mom, it was just a joke. In fact, I'm an atheist.
She would have been so relieved.
fsmdude 2 years ago
Concentrate your arguments/discussions on the contradictions in the bible. It's a lot easier to defend yourself. Leave the science out of it.
justintempler 2 years ago
Yeah, that's the way it works. You will be talking to a wall forever unless something clicks in her mind and she finally crosses over the threshold where she can actually think about the topic rationally. I'm in the same situation with my mother, but as I am in college and live 5 hours away it's probably much easier. We had some hardcore arguments about it a long time ago and now it's just something we don't mention. Eventually she'll either come around or leave it alone.
Archaneus 2 years ago 2
It also sounds to me like she thinks you're just expressing doubt, but has "faith" you'll come back into the fold. Until you categorically lay it on the line that you're an atheist, she won't get the gist of what you're trying to tell her, and will only continue tiptoeing around the important problems you throw at her about Christianity in respect to its conflicts with all things of reality.
JesusSavesAtCitibank 2 years ago
"She believes what she believes because it feels good."
A statement like that means that the truth is not what is most important to them. But with her, at least she loves you no matter what. That's more then some would say.
Everything u say, she's probably going to view it as a attack from satan... etc. Her worldview probably causes her to have her guard up against nonbelievers. It's sad but true.
Lovingdoubt 2 years ago 2
That a Helloween shirt ?
Anyway, for me "coming out" didn't really affect anything. I suppose my attitude was "atheist"since childhood so it didn't really surprise anyone. Grandma's responses were the best - I still laught when I think of them.
Then again fundamentalism isn't big around here - at least it's not very visible. Well, most of the time.
Just try to live as normal - after all, you haven't really changed at all. In fact, you were only honest.
Best wishes ~~
pienipaha 2 years ago
Tell your mom you love her and don't try to convert her. You did great.
prodigyat9 2 years ago
Yeah, no point in trying to convert her. Like most christians the "god wall" comes up when evidence and reason are presented. It's very frustrating. Best thing to do is simply slide the facts into conversations, but don't force the issues.
markio44 2 years ago
I told my christian mom I was an atheist about 10 months ago.
10 months later nothing about our relationship has changed because we didn't make a big deal about it.
ScrewLimbBizkit 2 years ago 3
First, I'm noticing a lot of comments here saying "don't convert your mom." Perhaps none of these people noticed, but Shwa wasn't trying to convert his mother, she just took it that way. Don't get confused with that.
second, I'm really glad it's going so well for you man. It's probably could have gone much worse, and it may yet get worse for you. Don't be a stranger if you ever wanna catch up or talk, eh?
BornInAsphodelMeadow 2 years ago 2
Good to hear that you've told your mom!
niiidar 2 years ago
My mum says the exact same thing but when she says stuff like it doesnt matter its because it gets to her, well thats why in my case, you can see sometimes in her face thats something just clicked.
Try not saying its about god existing, its about whether god did what the bible says. I find that tends to get through the armor around the brain they have. Start from a point that god is real and then show that he didnt do X as it says in the bible.
Or dont talk about it and leave it at that.
DanJC989 2 years ago
Wow....my mom is the same exact way, she says its all about faith and I sadly dont have faith and nothin I can say will ever change her mind. So I know exactly how you feel, me I just leave or stop the conversation. Besides I never try and convince her, I just try and tell her why I am an atheist [like you] and Iv told her I think the deity of the bible is immoral and my morals are superior right to her face. We just dont ever talk about it anymore. Anyway, I know how you feel.
jay666KJ 2 years ago
Also my mom says it doesnt matter. In fact when we went and saw The reaping, Russell talked about it on TAE on Strawmanning atheist. One part of the movie and Russell mnentioned thisw part as well, the strawman atheist, immediately comes up with natural ways to explain the 10 plagues, and my mom turned to me and whispered even if that is true doesnt mean god didnt do it. Which is ture becuase its none falsifiable, but which is most logical? In the movie it was just bias speculation. ie strawman
jay666KJ 2 years ago
Don't try to convert your mother. Just be nice and let her see you love her.
That's what I do
IAmDonar 2 years ago 2
Congratulations.
XChillX42 2 years ago
I'm sorry to hear your upbringing was so harsh with regards to indoctrination. I grew up religious, but it was never forced on me in the way it's so often forced on other people.
woodsofodin 2 years ago
*hugs* Well, the great thing is that she said she loves you no matter what. Better reaction than I got when I cam out as trans to my mom.
It's very interesting that, in some places and families, even religious ones, there is no "coming out". Some one living in the middle of Boston Mass would get a reaction from friends like, "Yeah and?"
woodsofodin 2 years ago
'Some one living in the middle of Boston Mass would get a reaction from friends like, "Yeah and?" '
Oh I heard from a young woman working at a university in Boston that she has to tip-toe and pretend.
MrFacet 2 years ago
Indoctrinated by science? By this does she mean, listening to logic? Your mom at least seems like a good person. I'm glad you got the chance to talk to her. I'll bet it feels great to have gotten a few things off your chest. From what you've told us, I think she knows where you stand on the matter.
AmyLynn7783 2 years ago
I'm glad to hear that things went better than expected.I have a hard time with my family on this too.
Jimb0can 2 years ago
Don't "convert" your mum.
Your an atheist and loved by you Christian parents.
Win.
Danmill23 2 years ago 5
Leave your mother be in her belief. Really let her be she is one of the ones that probably never will change. If she then so!
As long as you know how to do get your own life on your feet. And you know she remains to stay family. It never will be easy but accepting each other on a basic human level is nice yes.
masticina 2 years ago
Don't try to convert her. Just try to live with her. that's all you can do. Maybe now at least you can get out of going to jebus camp !!!
insightnew 2 years ago 3
good luck with your family.
Othelie 2 years ago
This has been flagged as spam show
I'd laugh if your mom watched this
barod1 2 years ago
"it's like talking to wall" good one
ObsidianTeen 2 years ago
you had to watch way of the master when you were young:(
poor kid
mambuduomally 2 years ago
The drug addict argument. It feels good.
It doesn't matter if your mom agrees with you. And if she is a wotm person there isn't a snowballs chance in hell you are going to change her mind. At least she isn't sending you have to a pshyc ward like one of friend was over not being religious.
I'd let it rest with your mom. :D
nadiaTeeze 2 years ago
It must be a relief to see that she doesn't freak out and that you no longer need to hide a part of yourself from her. I'm glad that it works out for you!
silverstream314 2 years ago
It sounds like you were not "outed" at all. She probably thinks that you just have doubts.
Katalyzt
Katalyzt 2 years ago
"Indoctrinated by science"? Does she not recognize her own lifelong quest to indoctrinate you?
wmd1 2 years ago 3
At least no one got hit by a big fish hook.
MrKrov 2 years ago
Stand your ground but try to stick to the things you have in common as well so she knows you havent really changed as a persob. Your never going to convert her now, people just get hardwired to think a certain way.
Skep155 2 years ago
I think it's great things worked out well.
I'm glad you were able to have those conversations.
I quite respect your mom for remaining decent to you.
Whuppee 2 years ago
write a list of all the things that she says that dont matter. keep it going till you get a good size list than show it to her. for each thing that dont matter to her give a reason why it should matter. a big list like that may open her eyes on how closed minded shes being about this. just a thought
xdawpax