This particular episode has been, just, a godsend. Recently moved out and I know how to smoke meat, but pasta? Beyond a can of sauce and some spices, it's not much. That cheese idea, though, was brilliant and I just did it with some ramen noodles and it DIDN'T SUCK!
Again, thank you guys. I'm going to use some shitty veggies and make not-quite-as-shitty mac and cheese tomorrow!
Simple: cheapest lamen - then shove everything you find around! Vegetables, 2 years old sauce, old meat with green mold, your cat, DONE! Something exotic, and it's hard to always make the same recipe!
Spaghetti sauteed with ketchup. I never tried it myself, but it doesn't sound bad. It is called a "Neapolitan" in the video game, Castlevania: Lament of Innocence. It restores hitpoints.
If you splurge on eggs, bacon, and a can of parmesan, you have carbonara. Delicious, cholestoroly carbonara.
Cook the bacon, cook the noodles, beat the egg, put the pasta in the bowl with the egg, crumble up the bacon and put it in the bowl, dust with parmesan. Then with like three or four boxes of spaghetti, that's like 12 meals for like 15 bucks total.
Store Brand Mac 'n Cheese is $0.50/box. Cook the noodles, dump them in a strainer. Then, in the pot, pour 1/2 cup Milk, 1/4 cup Cream, and the sauce packet. Cook on low, stirring constantly, until the powder is incorporated. Keep cooking, and it'll eventually thicken into a nice sauce. Add noodles, stir, and Enjoy.
Pasta Sauce often goes on B1G1 free at publix--if you're thrifty, you can make a jar of sauce last two meals--I used to stock up on the good stuff when it went on sale, then use it for the next month or so.
Also Mozzarella--a slice or two melted on top is deliiicious. Just use the broiler on your oven and watch that thing. If you have any sort of chicken or meat, you can top the pasta and sauce with meat and cheese, then broiler it to make a tasty meal.
Two cans of tomatoes. 75g of Butter. One onion, sliced in half. Salt, Pepper. Wait 45 minutes. Spaghetti. Astonishingly, this is a really good recipe, and damn lazy.
Pasta, drizzled with some cheap olive oil and some garlic powder sprinkled on top. If you're feeling fancy, a little parmesian cheese as well. But my favorite? Pasta with a bit of olive oil and a healthy does of Sriracha. Bam! Instant awesome.
You guys forgot to salt the water. That's important! If you don't salt the water, the salt in the pasta will leech into it, and then your pasta will be bland.
And for peeps who want to know how long you boil the pasta, the answer is 'until it's done'. Poke it with a fork! Eat a piece! You'll figure it out.
1 Package of Flavoured Pasta, usually about < $2 (if on sale). I usually use Knor Sidekicks.
1 Can of cheap tuna, usually $0.99
1 Cup of frozen vegetables (Bag of frozen veggies), $3.99, or a can of vegetables. $1.29
Prepare pasta, throw in veggies and tuna, bam! Meal with all your body needs for under $5. I lived off this combination for months, and it's damn tasty.
Heat up a can of crushed tomatoes and throw in a can of beans and then salt and spices, and you have about five servings of a good pasta sauce for like two bucks. Don't know how many times I've cooked this dish, and I never grow tired of it.
You'd better have stolen that milk! I know that brand! It's somehow fancy! You buy it at (I think) Noodles and Company for, like, a buck fifty or two dollars.
your cold seasoned pasta can then be reheated in your sauce/stir-fry towards the end of cooking in order to keep the pasta firm.
for cheese sauces I like to take a pat of butter and some milk, heat in a pan till it simmers and add shredded cheese that I've tossed in flour (making sure to remove any excess flour, the only flour you should add is that sticking to the cheese), this keeps the cheese sauce from being grainy without having to add excessive amounts of fat.
Pasta should always be shocked! I can't emphasize this enough. Shocking keeps your pasta from becoming gummy and sticking to itself; to shock pasta immediately drain it after it's done and then rinse it with cold water until it is thoroughly cold. Further you should also add a few good table spoons of salt and oil to the water in the pot before you begin boiling the pasta, this seasons the pasta and keeps the pot from boiling over.
Take chili flavored ramen, don't put in the spice,crumble the block of noodles first, strain the noodles and add a heaping spoon of mayo then mix i the spices. You won't taste the mayo, so instead you will be left with spicy pasta dip for your choice of chips. Welcome to college.
Tri color rotini > Boil > Cool down under cold water when they're done cooking > Parmesan Cheese and Italian Dressing ( Not the creamy kind, the oily kind ) > FUCKING EAT THAT SHIT NOMNOMNOM. Tastes better than slow roasted babies marinated in orphan tears.
You guys have an opinion on ramen packets? They seem like a bargain, but I've never crunched the numbers for the amount of food you're getting for the money versus nutrition and such. Are they even worth buying if I never use the included seasonings (too damn salty) and mix them with veggies and stuff?
White dude is unbelievably annoying. Not only does he add nothing to the clip, he makes it virtually unwatchable, which means your message will never reach people.
My favorite cheap noodle dish is to take a small package of hamburger, brown it, add a can of cream of mushroom soup, and a liberal soaking of Worcestershire sauce, then stir in the noodles. Beef stroganoff-like but for about $4. Stir in some frozen peas if you want real luxury at about a buck more.
A portion of pasta is usually about 100 grams of pasta (let's say... one fifth of a pound?). If you are on a diet then 50 grams (i usually eat just 50 grams). If you are SUPER hungry and you want to eat only pasta then 150-200 grams (but it's unhealthy on the long run, especially if you put a ton of butter and cheese on it).
If you want to know if pasta is ready just take one out the boiling water and taste it. if it's so hard you can feel the raw inside, then 5 more minutes. If you like it, then it's ok. If it's so soft and sticky that it's all joined together then CONGRATULATIONS, you just ruined it, moron! You have to pay attention to the boiling time, otherwise you get shit inside your mouth.
Are you mad guys? you put a whole stick of butter in that pasta? Of course you're gonna get heart attacks like mad when you hit your 40th year... Wait will you even get to live that long?
if you don't give a damn about spices, throw frozen veggies and diced tomatoes in a pot for sauce. Throw slightly more spices in for Italian (or Jersey Shore) effect. Make it large enough, and freeze it for later so you can be lazy and just heat it up.
Personally I go for box of high fiber spaghetti (which can be bought for as cheap as store brand if you buy MASS QUANTITIES on sale), then add a can of diced tomatoes, and some frozen veggies, and microwave that sucka whenever you want to eat. Of course some parm cheese is a must too, but only after microwaving.
Great. Like the slightly different characterization for this episode- stick to it and bring me more. (Though I really, really hope I never need these)
surprised you didn't go with the good standby oil and garlic. Take pasta, poor olive oil on it, add garlic powder and maybe some oregano and crushed red pepper and then add some parmigiana cheese on top.
Gah! Did he throw an ENTIRE STICK OF BUTTER in that?
Leafy greens are as easy to grow as weeds and go good in the pot - better yet, go thru the weeds in the lawn looking for purslanes and dandelion leaves. Do a show on scavenging for edibles in your backyard!
Cheap Pesto usually tastes the best and you dont even need to warm it.
Keep away from the red one, real Pesto is green.
If you wanna go really fancy, just put in some grumbeld Parmigiano (Parmesan) and you have a nice italian dinner to impress any potantial mating partners.
On most packages of ravioli it gives you instructions for microwaving it. This is incredibly easy, throw whatever you want to coat your ravioli in a bowl be it pasta sauce, chicken broth or the blood of your enemies, into the bowl, place in around 5 ravioli per serving and BAM, you didn't even have the time to form tears.
Oregano, garlic powder, onion powder, and pepper. All the spices you'll ever need. Cook & drain pasta, add a little oil, mix in the above spices to taste, eat.
Get some hot dogs. Cut them up into pieces. Then poke the raw spaghetti into the hot dog pieces. Boil until the pasta is done and the hot dogs hot. Eat up that shit son.
1/ Cook 2 portions of pasta in 1.5 litres of the blood or your enemies.
2/ Add 200g of caster suger to the pot; stirr till fully disolved.
3/ Leave the mixture in the fridge overnight to chill and congeal.
4/ Finnaly, garnish with basil and tears before serving.
And voila!
Sweet revenge pasta. (Best served cold)
Optional extra: Sauté 2 handfulls of finely chopped meat chunks from your enemy's most beloved pet and add to the mix after step 1. (Dog meat may need more time to cook than cat)
Cheap pasta + cheap ketchup. Or pasta with tuna can (tuna chunks)... You can cut tomatoes to small pieces and put it in. But It it usually makes food a bit cold. It's not like sauce :-( But it's good, cheap (in my country, which is not America, but broke eastern Europe; and you really need to lose your inner fear of cheap looking cans - they are fish too) and has nutrition value (not like pre-made food you just put into microwave).
@scarr009 How long is written on the package. Thou best way to make pasta is try to do it al dente, but you actually need to watch over the boiling and try some pasta while they're boiling. When they are firm but not hard it's done, and you can use fancy Italian terms to describe your cheap food for the rest of your poverty.
@scarr009 Pasta cooking instructions are typically printed on the package, failing that cook them until they are palatable (poke the noodles until they are floppy, then taste one every minute until they are tasty soft... try to remember how long it took last time)
1. Use lots of water, more than you think. Too little water means gummy pasta.
2. Salt the water; how much depends on how much water, but remember you need to season all that pasta!
3. Bring the water to a rolling boil before adding the pasta; stir RIGHT AWAY to separate the strands, and return it to the boil ASAP. After that, the boiling will keep the pasta apart.
4. Pull strands out and taste. When it's done but still a little firm, it's done.
5. Drain. At this point, you've basically got two ways of keeping it from sticking together.
5a - The cold way; rinse it under cold water and wash all the starch off. It won't stick, but it'll be cold. You'll have to reheat (or serve with a hot sauce).
5b - The hot way; add a little bit of whatever fat or oil is in the sauce (butter or olive oil) and stir it in. The pasta won't stick.
iknow a free source of food, and it's got ALL the nutrients(other people) yea weiner made a comic about it once so it's not as funny now that i make it in a comment here.
chop finely bacon and onions and fry them slightly, just until the bacon is pink. add a little parsley and peeled tomatoes, then cook on a low flame until the tomatoes have melted. This can take a while, even up to a few hours. Cook your spaghetti, add the sauce, and drop a couple leaves of basil on it. DONE.
If you want something more similar to Kraft Dinner, you can usually find the powdered cheese at bulk stores. Buying the cheese powder and pasta separately is often cheaper, and allows more portion control.
That's an ungodly amount of butter in your pasta, sir! You could do with a quarter of that and still make it delicious. You could do 1/8th of that and add whole milk and get the same effect.
if you feel like eating vitamins like you're part of the 1% or something, add broccoli or spinach to your cheese pasta! Not that much more expensive, but a rainbow of flavors!
If you wanna spice up some storebought pasta sauce, you can easily fry some chopped onions and garlic in the pot before you heat the sauce up in there. You can even add some spices or fresh vegetables too, if you're feeling really swanky.
Yea, I do that all the time. I like adding Zucchini in witht he onions. Mushrooms are good too and you can get ones in a can for cheap that fry well. Fry the mushrooms, onion and zucchini together, then add sauce. Use a little butter or oil to help the sizzle.
OK cheap and very filling. Put ramen in a pot, cover with 2 cans of tomato soup, heat until ramen is soft and soup is hot. Throw some cheese in there if you like your soup to stick to your teeth. Yum!
LIES. I saw NOT SHITTY milk in there — organic if I saw correctly. If you were really broke you'd use store brand milk, or milk powder and water. Or water. Or tears.
If you want to make your own ghetto marinara sauce get a can of plain tomato sauce, a can of tomato paste and a can of either tomato sauce, dice tomatoes, or stewed tomatoes (if you it chunkier, respectively).
Put this in a pot and add salt, pepper, and oregano to taste (+ about half as much basil if your budget allows). Toss in a tablespoon ish of some kind of oil (butter, vegetable oil, or olive oil if you're classy).
Add water if too thick. Can also toss in sauteed shrooms/garlic/onion
@PinkalPeaches And if you want to get really fancy, 2 tablespoons of cheap red wine. BTW, if you have a lot of ingredients, the taste will improve if you cook it for at least 20 minutes.
So, this was uploaded on Aug 29, called new by Mr. Weiner on Nov 15 and takes place either 6 weeks ago or a week in the future. Oh well, good job time travelers, I love your work.
excellent video, guys! when i was in germany i lived off pasta for...well, the entire time. the supermarket near my dorm sold a kilo bag of deliciousness for 2e. amazing.
I add a spoon of olive oil and trim cheese on top. Quick and delicious (but the olive oil is a bit expensive - unless you have your own olive trees and make your own oil every year).
This particular episode has been, just, a godsend. Recently moved out and I know how to smoke meat, but pasta? Beyond a can of sauce and some spices, it's not much. That cheese idea, though, was brilliant and I just did it with some ramen noodles and it DIDN'T SUCK!
Again, thank you guys. I'm going to use some shitty veggies and make not-quite-as-shitty mac and cheese tomorrow!
TrollOfReason 1 day ago
Simple: cheapest lamen - then shove everything you find around! Vegetables, 2 years old sauce, old meat with green mold, your cat, DONE! Something exotic, and it's hard to always make the same recipe!
Dabeyoun 2 weeks ago
These aren't supposed to be recipes, they're meant as hilarious instructions on how to feed yourself cheaply.
knowsfords 2 weeks ago
Soup. Buy some vegetables, put them in a pot of boiling water.
zrogoszinski 3 weeks ago
@zrogoszinski touch him on the penis. Oops. Wrong channel.
devcrom3 2 weeks ago
WRIST SLITTIN TIEM!
LoopyDoodler 3 weeks ago in playlist More videos from Hand2MouthShow
Spaghetti sauteed with ketchup. I never tried it myself, but it doesn't sound bad. It is called a "Neapolitan" in the video game, Castlevania: Lament of Innocence. It restores hitpoints.
Codeman73H1337 3 weeks ago
If you splurge on eggs, bacon, and a can of parmesan, you have carbonara. Delicious, cholestoroly carbonara.
Cook the bacon, cook the noodles, beat the egg, put the pasta in the bowl with the egg, crumble up the bacon and put it in the bowl, dust with parmesan. Then with like three or four boxes of spaghetti, that's like 12 meals for like 15 bucks total.
tigerhawkteenager 3 weeks ago
@tigerhawkteenager
And what's even better is that the ingredients sans noodles pull double duty as nice breakfast food.
tigerhawkteenager 3 weeks ago
Speaking as a starving college student... you guys are a god damned heroes.
tdlob1 3 weeks ago
Was that a brick of butter? What the hell.
katawatenshu 1 month ago 9
Store Brand Mac 'n Cheese is $0.50/box. Cook the noodles, dump them in a strainer. Then, in the pot, pour 1/2 cup Milk, 1/4 cup Cream, and the sauce packet. Cook on low, stirring constantly, until the powder is incorporated. Keep cooking, and it'll eventually thicken into a nice sauce. Add noodles, stir, and Enjoy.
Circuitsoft 1 month ago
This is one of the few places i've actually seen people be helpful on the internet, keep it up!
MadeOfCATS 1 month ago
Nice brand-name organic milk, Mr Rockefeller...
economicist2011 1 month ago 3
@economicist2011 its stolen milk from his little brother dur
s74r0fch40s 1 month ago
I've made cheesy noodles six times times since first watching this, and had it as a meal 24 times. Thank you guys for my impending heart attack.
capnfullpants 1 month ago 3
Pasta Sauce often goes on B1G1 free at publix--if you're thrifty, you can make a jar of sauce last two meals--I used to stock up on the good stuff when it went on sale, then use it for the next month or so.
Also Mozzarella--a slice or two melted on top is deliiicious. Just use the broiler on your oven and watch that thing. If you have any sort of chicken or meat, you can top the pasta and sauce with meat and cheese, then broiler it to make a tasty meal.
NenonaFire 2 months ago
This is a cooking show in the way that Meerkat Manor is a documentary.
MrWumbologist 3 months ago
Two cans of tomatoes. 75g of Butter. One onion, sliced in half. Salt, Pepper. Wait 45 minutes. Spaghetti. Astonishingly, this is a really good recipe, and damn lazy.
kdansky 3 months ago
I enjoy James grave dance
Shmoe101 3 months ago
Pasta, drizzled with some cheap olive oil and some garlic powder sprinkled on top. If you're feeling fancy, a little parmesian cheese as well. But my favorite? Pasta with a bit of olive oil and a healthy does of Sriracha. Bam! Instant awesome.
rotorhead87 3 months ago
Cheese is the most expensive part to any pasta meal.
knowsfords 3 months ago
You guys forgot to salt the water. That's important! If you don't salt the water, the salt in the pasta will leech into it, and then your pasta will be bland.
And for peeps who want to know how long you boil the pasta, the answer is 'until it's done'. Poke it with a fork! Eat a piece! You'll figure it out.
Crazycannibalelf 3 months ago
Something I call the "Bachelor's Casserole":
1 Package of Flavoured Pasta, usually about < $2 (if on sale). I usually use Knor Sidekicks.
1 Can of cheap tuna, usually $0.99
1 Cup of frozen vegetables (Bag of frozen veggies), $3.99, or a can of vegetables. $1.29
Prepare pasta, throw in veggies and tuna, bam! Meal with all your body needs for under $5. I lived off this combination for months, and it's damn tasty.
KittyMeurow 3 months ago
Pasta + Olive Oil + Garlic. Delicious and additionally nets you lots of free space on public transportation.
dunn0r 3 months ago 2
While I found it really funny, the audio quality could need some improvement. Buy a Store Brand Microphone, Rockefeller!
lagerbaer 3 months ago
cans of tomato+cans of beans+ spices+onions+garlic + hot sauce= chili P:
AnaesthetistGuy 3 months ago
Heat up a can of crushed tomatoes and throw in a can of beans and then salt and spices, and you have about five servings of a good pasta sauce for like two bucks. Don't know how many times I've cooked this dish, and I never grow tired of it.
adequatelg2s 3 months ago
That was great, keep up with this!
Morlaak 3 months ago
Organic milk, can't be cheap :P
tspshilt 3 months ago
@tspshilt Not to worry, it was stolen for his brother.
ScapegoatYoni 3 months ago
You'd better have stolen that milk! I know that brand! It's somehow fancy! You buy it at (I think) Noodles and Company for, like, a buck fifty or two dollars.
bbrake 3 months ago
(continued from below)
your cold seasoned pasta can then be reheated in your sauce/stir-fry towards the end of cooking in order to keep the pasta firm.
for cheese sauces I like to take a pat of butter and some milk, heat in a pan till it simmers and add shredded cheese that I've tossed in flour (making sure to remove any excess flour, the only flour you should add is that sticking to the cheese), this keeps the cheese sauce from being grainy without having to add excessive amounts of fat.
Bastmosis 3 months ago
Pasta should always be shocked! I can't emphasize this enough. Shocking keeps your pasta from becoming gummy and sticking to itself; to shock pasta immediately drain it after it's done and then rinse it with cold water until it is thoroughly cold. Further you should also add a few good table spoons of salt and oil to the water in the pot before you begin boiling the pasta, this seasons the pasta and keeps the pot from boiling over.
Bastmosis 3 months ago
Take chili flavored ramen, don't put in the spice,crumble the block of noodles first, strain the noodles and add a heaping spoon of mayo then mix i the spices. You won't taste the mayo, so instead you will be left with spicy pasta dip for your choice of chips. Welcome to college.
vagrantwanderer 3 months ago
are you out of bread? make pasta and stir in some peanut butter and jelly
LiamDonov 3 months ago
dude, why have spaghettie when you got ramen in the back?
sonicase 3 months ago
Tri color rotini > Boil > Cool down under cold water when they're done cooking > Parmesan Cheese and Italian Dressing ( Not the creamy kind, the oily kind ) > FUCKING EAT THAT SHIT NOMNOMNOM. Tastes better than slow roasted babies marinated in orphan tears.
AlcoholicPancake 3 months ago
* Season the water used to boil the pasta
* 3 Sauce bases: Cream, Oil, Tomato
* Measure your servings so that you can plan and strategize your intake.
* Save the extra cooked pasta for the day. Will store well for a 3 days in a airtight container.
* Make your own sauces in the Jars in the weekends to save cash and time in the week day.
* Precooked pasta and sauce, and just microwave or reheat in pot.
Justinian1979 3 months ago
4 words: pasta + cookie dough
thenendo 3 months ago
ahem, italian dude here.
a couple of easy ones: anchovies+cauliflower, chilli+oil+garlic, or just oil+grated cheese.
i don't know how to end this, so i'll just say that SMBC in italian is "Cereali da Colazione del Sabato Mattina"
Numaltar 3 months ago
Pasta + Italian Dressing = Pasta Salad
Pasta + Salsa = Something that tastes mexican
Also, the three recipes in the video work with rice.
SinbadEV 3 months ago
Uploaded... on... august 29th?
WHAT IS THIS WITCHCRAFT.
dftbacacia 3 months ago 22
PASTA!!!!!!
dyedsaphire 3 months ago
You guys have an opinion on ramen packets? They seem like a bargain, but I've never crunched the numbers for the amount of food you're getting for the money versus nutrition and such. Are they even worth buying if I never use the included seasonings (too damn salty) and mix them with veggies and stuff?
excalibran 3 months ago
White dude is unbelievably annoying. Not only does he add nothing to the clip, he makes it virtually unwatchable, which means your message will never reach people.
bigsteveno 3 months ago
Bad acting, worse recipes, still a great show.
villel80 3 months ago
My favorite cheap noodle dish is to take a small package of hamburger, brown it, add a can of cream of mushroom soup, and a liberal soaking of Worcestershire sauce, then stir in the noodles. Beef stroganoff-like but for about $4. Stir in some frozen peas if you want real luxury at about a buck more.
brockknudsen 3 months ago
lemon juice, garlic, and oil.
cymonsgames 3 months ago
Make a plain omelet (or whatever you can afford to put in your omelet), half-way through cooking it add the noodles. Now you have a noodlelet.
BeatenByCats 3 months ago
i eat pasta as it is, just with salt. the cheapest.
iamacreativeusername 3 months ago
Continuing:
A portion of pasta is usually about 100 grams of pasta (let's say... one fifth of a pound?). If you are on a diet then 50 grams (i usually eat just 50 grams). If you are SUPER hungry and you want to eat only pasta then 150-200 grams (but it's unhealthy on the long run, especially if you put a ton of butter and cheese on it).
rox1317 3 months ago
Dudes. I love this idea. But you're kind of missing the bit with the skills. A little bit of skill is the difference beten a che
zoenekton 3 months ago
Continuing:
If you want to know if pasta is ready just take one out the boiling water and taste it. if it's so hard you can feel the raw inside, then 5 more minutes. If you like it, then it's ok. If it's so soft and sticky that it's all joined together then CONGRATULATIONS, you just ruined it, moron! You have to pay attention to the boiling time, otherwise you get shit inside your mouth.
rox1317 3 months ago
Also, I'm Italian, so for those of you wondering how long you should boil your pasta, here's a little time table you should consider:
Boil the water, add a pinch of salt and then put the pasta inside the pot.
There should be a LOT of room for pasta to swim inside the water, don't do like james and marque there, cooking in a mini pot.
Spaghetti : about 7-8 minutes, depending on the diameter of the pasta. Thinner pasta needs less, even just 5 minutes.
short pasta in general: about 10 minutes.
rox1317 3 months ago
Are you mad guys? you put a whole stick of butter in that pasta? Of course you're gonna get heart attacks like mad when you hit your 40th year... Wait will you even get to live that long?
rox1317 3 months ago
Did James just out Marque at the end of the video?
cryoghoul 3 months ago
It's wrist lettin' time *throw mac and cheese*
knowsfords 3 months ago
Use canned crushed tomatoes instead of tomato sauce and add salt and spices. Much cheaper.
TheAbstractparadox 3 months ago 48
@TheAbstractparadox To quote the video:
"(OR get a can of tomatoes if you own a can opener.) and add any of the following
* SHITTY SPICES
* SHITTY CHEESE
* Feeling rich? SHITTY WINE."
Arat1t1 2 days ago
Cleveland and Peter
emadrio 3 months ago
key to pasta cheapness: volume.
if you don't give a damn about spices, throw frozen veggies and diced tomatoes in a pot for sauce. Throw slightly more spices in for Italian (or Jersey Shore) effect. Make it large enough, and freeze it for later so you can be lazy and just heat it up.
88thEpidemic 3 months ago
Personally I go for box of high fiber spaghetti (which can be bought for as cheap as store brand if you buy MASS QUANTITIES on sale), then add a can of diced tomatoes, and some frozen veggies, and microwave that sucka whenever you want to eat. Of course some parm cheese is a must too, but only after microwaving.
darthpepito 3 months ago
hey im in college so i seriously took notes on this
sizzlor93 3 months ago
Wow. James has some problems.
teel115 3 months ago
Great. Like the slightly different characterization for this episode- stick to it and bring me more. (Though I really, really hope I never need these)
fljared 3 months ago in playlist More videos from Hand2MouthShow
Heyyy, is that the music from Half in the Bag?
I smell homage!
Viraus2 3 months ago
2:48 Tits bouncing.
Kogerii 3 months ago
surprised you didn't go with the good standby oil and garlic. Take pasta, poor olive oil on it, add garlic powder and maybe some oregano and crushed red pepper and then add some parmigiana cheese on top.
porgy29 3 months ago
Gah! Did he throw an ENTIRE STICK OF BUTTER in that?
Leafy greens are as easy to grow as weeds and go good in the pot - better yet, go thru the weeds in the lawn looking for purslanes and dandelion leaves. Do a show on scavenging for edibles in your backyard!
mosseveno 3 months ago
@mosseveno scavenging in your back yard doesn't fit the laziness requirement, or the simple since you have to sort of know what you are looking for.
porgy29 3 months ago
The best way to eat Pasta is with Pesto.
Cheap Pesto usually tastes the best and you dont even need to warm it.
Keep away from the red one, real Pesto is green.
If you wanna go really fancy, just put in some grumbeld Parmigiano (Parmesan) and you have a nice italian dinner to impress any potantial mating partners.
derJOHO86 3 months ago
How boring was that.
overmind6 3 months ago
So you've done rice and pasta, seems like you're out of foods to cook now.
hellenion 3 months ago
Hey guys, love the video, love the series.
Suggestion/idea for an entry in the series - Protein! What kind of meat or other source of protein can we easily and cheaply buy and cook?
I know carbs are WAY less expensive per calorie, but carbs and veggies alone don't satisfy my carnivorous urges!
EdgeOfDreams 3 months ago
@EdgeOfDreams
Cheapness would lean towards soy but that kills your sperm count and the whole point of protein is to be masculine.
Kogerii 3 months ago
cheep idea, crushed roman and cheese
ilovemusicWIKA 3 months ago
Yay! :D
new cooking tips and tricks from our favorite Harvard criminal and his awesome sidekick, President and Baby-kicker, Satan ! :D
TubeofDestiny 3 months ago
Also:
Take 1 package of Ramen. Remove it from the package. Eat the raw, condensed brick of Ramen.
I call it the "Oh god oh god why are my gums bleeding?!?"
JesseZinVT 3 months ago
I need this to be a regular series.
On the Food Network.
JesseZinVT 3 months ago
On most packages of ravioli it gives you instructions for microwaving it. This is incredibly easy, throw whatever you want to coat your ravioli in a bowl be it pasta sauce, chicken broth or the blood of your enemies, into the bowl, place in around 5 ravioli per serving and BAM, you didn't even have the time to form tears.
harkejuice 3 months ago
Oregano, garlic powder, onion powder, and pepper. All the spices you'll ever need. Cook & drain pasta, add a little oil, mix in the above spices to taste, eat.
deyv87 3 months ago
You use the same song at the end as "Heather the Vampire". Cool!
snorlax42 3 months ago
Add a little food coloring to the water to make it feel like you are being creative ... mmmm goth pasta and cheese.
TrinityDejavu8 3 months ago
Get some hot dogs. Cut them up into pieces. Then poke the raw spaghetti into the hot dog pieces. Boil until the pasta is done and the hot dogs hot. Eat up that shit son.
Stephen3132 3 months ago
You can also sweat some mushrooms and add them to the pasta.
helyiterminator 3 months ago
also, that's vodka "to taste" which means about a teaspoon or two, or however much makes you happy. I don't judge.
fubuloubu 3 months ago
1 box of cheap mac and cheese
1 can of tomato soup
optional: old dubra vodka for "authenticalness"
Step 1: cook mac and cheese according to directions
Step 2: when combining cheese sauce, add in tomato soup as well
Step 3: Stir, and add in optional vodka and cook for a few minutes while mixing to warm everything up
BOOM! cheap vodka sauce dinner
fubuloubu 3 months ago
1/cook pasta
2/put olive oil and anchovies into a frying pan
3/(if you can afford it) put raisens and pine nuts in there as well.
4/stir the pasta in the frying pan.
Mmm damn good foriana.
Gruegirl 3 months ago
1/ Cook 2 portions of pasta in 1.5 litres of the blood or your enemies.
2/ Add 200g of caster suger to the pot; stirr till fully disolved.
3/ Leave the mixture in the fridge overnight to chill and congeal.
4/ Finnaly, garnish with basil and tears before serving.
And voila!
Sweet revenge pasta. (Best served cold)
Optional extra: Sauté 2 handfulls of finely chopped meat chunks from your enemy's most beloved pet and add to the mix after step 1. (Dog meat may need more time to cook than cat)
blackmind1992 3 months ago
Cheap pasta + cheap ketchup. Or pasta with tuna can (tuna chunks)... You can cut tomatoes to small pieces and put it in. But It it usually makes food a bit cold. It's not like sauce :-( But it's good, cheap (in my country, which is not America, but broke eastern Europe; and you really need to lose your inner fear of cheap looking cans - they are fish too) and has nutrition value (not like pre-made food you just put into microwave).
hitchhiker974 3 months ago
He looks like a dwarf when he dances.
TheAnonOutis 3 months ago
I've only got one question after watching your video...
That cheesy buttery pasta...how does it not make you ill after eating that much butter?
padfootsm 3 months ago
I like these Hand to Mouth videos but I wish they would be a bit more detailed. You sort of gloss over some areas that I think are kind of important.
Some examples: How long should I boil the pasta? How much cheese/butter/water/pasta should I use?
They may seem like obvious questions but I think they can only help the quality of these videos.
scarr009 3 months ago 13
@scarr009 How long is written on the package. Thou best way to make pasta is try to do it al dente, but you actually need to watch over the boiling and try some pasta while they're boiling. When they are firm but not hard it's done, and you can use fancy Italian terms to describe your cheap food for the rest of your poverty.
hitchhiker974 3 months ago
@hitchhiker974 "Thou best way to make pasta"
You accidentally became old-timey!
StarkMaximum 3 months ago
@scarr009 Pasta cooking instructions are typically printed on the package, failing that cook them until they are palatable (poke the noodles until they are floppy, then taste one every minute until they are tasty soft... try to remember how long it took last time)
SinbadEV 3 months ago
@scarr009 Yeah, there are a few things missing:
1. Use lots of water, more than you think. Too little water means gummy pasta.
2. Salt the water; how much depends on how much water, but remember you need to season all that pasta!
3. Bring the water to a rolling boil before adding the pasta; stir RIGHT AWAY to separate the strands, and return it to the boil ASAP. After that, the boiling will keep the pasta apart.
4. Pull strands out and taste. When it's done but still a little firm, it's done.
cmacksey 3 months ago
@scarr009 (Continued)
5. Drain. At this point, you've basically got two ways of keeping it from sticking together.
5a - The cold way; rinse it under cold water and wash all the starch off. It won't stick, but it'll be cold. You'll have to reheat (or serve with a hot sauce).
5b - The hot way; add a little bit of whatever fat or oil is in the sauce (butter or olive oil) and stir it in. The pasta won't stick.
6. Add sauce, etc. and eat.
cmacksey 3 months ago
iknow a free source of food, and it's got ALL the nutrients(other people) yea weiner made a comic about it once so it's not as funny now that i make it in a comment here.
Zralf 3 months ago
Wow. Was that a whole stick of butter? 8 tbsp; really?
skor459 3 months ago
chop finely bacon and onions and fry them slightly, just until the bacon is pink. add a little parsley and peeled tomatoes, then cook on a low flame until the tomatoes have melted. This can take a while, even up to a few hours. Cook your spaghetti, add the sauce, and drop a couple leaves of basil on it. DONE.
m3chcub 3 months ago
drizzle some olive oil and add powder parmesan cheese and pepper to plain pasta. Voila unplain pasta.
Ertwin123 3 months ago
$0.99 box of mac'n'cheese + $0.50 can of beanless chili = family sized pan of chili-mac. You're welcome.
Wufnu 3 months ago
If you want something more similar to Kraft Dinner, you can usually find the powdered cheese at bulk stores. Buying the cheese powder and pasta separately is often cheaper, and allows more portion control.
Valacosa 3 months ago
You put an entire fucking stick of butter in there. I approve.
gdavies000 3 months ago
That's an ungodly amount of butter in your pasta, sir! You could do with a quarter of that and still make it delicious. You could do 1/8th of that and add whole milk and get the same effect.
octaviusv 3 months ago
if you feel like eating vitamins like you're part of the 1% or something, add broccoli or spinach to your cheese pasta! Not that much more expensive, but a rainbow of flavors!
nicocote 3 months ago
I thought this was great. More of these please!
zporkz 3 months ago
the best best best
skmojoed 3 months ago
If you wanna spice up some storebought pasta sauce, you can easily fry some chopped onions and garlic in the pot before you heat the sauce up in there. You can even add some spices or fresh vegetables too, if you're feeling really swanky.
mauraofdunlath 3 months ago
@mauraofdunlath
Yea, I do that all the time. I like adding Zucchini in witht he onions. Mushrooms are good too and you can get ones in a can for cheap that fry well. Fry the mushrooms, onion and zucchini together, then add sauce. Use a little butter or oil to help the sizzle.
Maxislithium 3 months ago
Butter and Garlic Salt!
matclift 3 months ago
OK cheap and very filling. Put ramen in a pot, cover with 2 cans of tomato soup, heat until ramen is soft and soup is hot. Throw some cheese in there if you like your soup to stick to your teeth. Yum!
523EROs 3 months ago
@523EROs Ramen is crazy salty. It's not that great for you.
Godbot256 3 months ago
@Godbot256 Except you know, Salt isn't bad for you
aparslet 3 months ago
1:06 even if the mouse poop DID touch the pasta, you're gonna be boiling it anyway.
Dorminay42 3 months ago
LIES. I saw NOT SHITTY milk in there — organic if I saw correctly. If you were really broke you'd use store brand milk, or milk powder and water. Or water. Or tears.
aidmh 3 months ago 2
@aidmh To be fair, we did suggest STEALING the milk. But pay attention kids - this man is wise.
smbcextras 3 months ago
If you want to make your own ghetto marinara sauce get a can of plain tomato sauce, a can of tomato paste and a can of either tomato sauce, dice tomatoes, or stewed tomatoes (if you it chunkier, respectively).
Put this in a pot and add salt, pepper, and oregano to taste (+ about half as much basil if your budget allows). Toss in a tablespoon ish of some kind of oil (butter, vegetable oil, or olive oil if you're classy).
Add water if too thick. Can also toss in sauteed shrooms/garlic/onion
PinkalPeaches 3 months ago
@PinkalPeaches And if you want to get really fancy, 2 tablespoons of cheap red wine. BTW, if you have a lot of ingredients, the taste will improve if you cook it for at least 20 minutes.
PinkalPeaches 3 months ago
Funny and tasty.
Franpowah 3 months ago
So, this was uploaded on Aug 29, called new by Mr. Weiner on Nov 15 and takes place either 6 weeks ago or a week in the future. Oh well, good job time travelers, I love your work.
screamingturnip 3 months ago
@screamingturnip guess should say I wrote this on Nov 15, in case you have powerball numbers.
screamingturnip 3 months ago
DONE. YOU HAVE FOOD.
i enjoy this show
Goldbloodeddragon 3 months ago
Thank you hand 2 mouth cooking show for making me laugh during the next funeral when they play that over used and over clichéd Bette Midler song.
mrlobsta1989 3 months ago
excellent video, guys! when i was in germany i lived off pasta for...well, the entire time. the supermarket near my dorm sold a kilo bag of deliciousness for 2e. amazing.
enduringstone 3 months ago
I need a Hand2Mouth for toast
sheepdean 3 months ago
Soy sauce is asian~! Too much veggiez =D
The om nom nom doesn't seem so cheesy, buttery~ =O
CommS007 6 months ago
Hmmm comfort food against mental scarring (>O_O)>
CommS007 6 months ago
sexy
telanis9 6 months ago
Oops. I think I may have actually learned from this.
PikeNarus 6 months ago 2
I add a spoon of olive oil and trim cheese on top. Quick and delicious (but the olive oil is a bit expensive - unless you have your own olive trees and make your own oil every year).
stavrosg 6 months ago
Can of tomatoes. A can of shitty tuna. Some cream. Done. Salt and pepper if you are feeling rich. Garlic or any spice works really.
Skjutentrast 6 months ago
I love how many legitimate cooking shows are in the Suggestions list. I wonder if that works both ways.
idlovetoclimbthat 6 months ago
I like throwing in half a jar of cheap alfredo sauce and a can of tuna/chicken. Maybe a small can of olives if I'm feeling fancy.
ddraigeneth 6 months ago
Mmm Hand to Mouth
arr2036 6 months ago
Touch him on the penis, get free creamy pasta sauce. Spaghetti carbaboner.
arr2036 6 months ago 38
Awesome--can we get more?
Kovukono 6 months ago 15