Added: 2 years ago
From: Jesusophile
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  • I can't get over this. I love your videos!!!!! MORE!!!

  • Has anyone ever told you that you look like Jared Padalecki? No homo.

  • Not faginal sex again

  • I love licking clitoris!!!

  • I especially love it when he eats his demonstrations lol. And to the people taking him seriously on all of his videos , I hope you never do what he's describing in this video because human kind does not need more stupid folks like you.

  • eve was deceived by satan three times, read he genesis of adam and eve found in russia, the 900 years and all the ife of adam and eve its amazing i can actually send it to u if u want

  • "the pain in childbirth is punishment", "it's okay for vaginal sex to hurt", "The woman is designed for the man's pleasure", "The man does all the work, the woman just lays there and receives", "lesbians are lazy", "lesbians make themselves less attractive-You will never be a heterosexual dressed like that" "your man has had a rough day, all he wants to do is put sperm into you, don't ask him to lick you" ..."I'M A MAN I HAVE NOTHING AGAINST WOMEN"'

  • lol

  • This is genius, wether for real or not.

  • press 5 for the birth of hennifer lopeth

  • Successful troll is successful... Look at all the Atheists getting mad... xp He's on our side, people. You REALLY think he could believe this stuff? Trololol... Satire for the win.

  • people he is JOKING. its called satire, look into it.

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  • why the fuck did you just rape the crap out of that orange... and buy the way you are officially the biggest asshole known to all women... and gay men.. and lesbians... btw, my sisterhas short hair and she is really pretty. what would you have done if you were born a women... i bet you wouldnt be all god loving now would you.

  • no wonder this world is going down in a nosedive with viewpoints like this loose on the streets..

    how do we expect reasonable decisions to be made when culture and society is not even able to educate the people...

    high probability that commenting on this is a giant waste of my time, but anyway. i guess we all must be stupid.

  • i just love his "scientific experiments"

  • You Sir, are freaking HI-larious!  I have no idea how you keep a straight face through this. XD

  • you sir are the DUMBEST fucking human i have ever had the misfortune to have been linked here by a friend to see how stupidly funny you are. please go kill yourself for the betterment of the fucking species.

  • At first I thought you were serious and I thought "this guys a nut case" but after I saw more of your videos, I realised that you are a brilliant comedian. This is one of funniest YouTube channels I've ever been on. The best way to make fun of Christianity is parody and you an exceleant job. you had me for a while then i whatch few more and said this guy can't be serious. Are you touring anytime soon would love to catch you act live. I haven't laughed this hard in ages. Thank you

  • He should teach kindergarten

  • this one's gonna die alone.

    HA-HA!

  • haha he's not serious, funny guy

  • who cares if it hurts for the woman? as long as she can make him a sandwich after

  • I just like the idea of Adam and Eve having babies, and their babies having a long line of incestuous relationships.

  • OH MY GOD!!!! Alright, either he's the most confused idiot on this planet, or he's just a troll, OR he's an atheist who is pretending to be religious to show the world how religious people are.

  • hahahaahahaha! -cant breathe- "no one will want you like that"

  • lol this guys the biggest fuckin idiot

  • mmmmm babies taste good with Soy Sauce.

  • ehh everyone has their veiws ill let you have your opinions but bro. you need to like.... uhhh... just never mind.

    i dissagree with you alot.

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  • Turn YouTube subtitles on. You'll get some good laughs. For example:

    "i would like to talk about why it is okayed for the title sexton hurts"

    or

    "you know luke and his obviously in an actual senior execs"

  • 10/10 excellent troll

  • hahahah this is amazing, troll of the century

  • Sexist, patriarchal garbage!

  • I know you're not a Christian-I've watched another of your videos. You may think you're being funny or you may be someone who thinks people who believe in Jesus are stupid. I don't know but I pray that the Lord will open your heart, mind and eyes so you may find the truth that is in Jesus, that you may also gain eternal life. People who mock Jesus and the Bible make the best Christians once they discover the error of their ways.

  • @fearworshipGod The only thing i want from Jesus, is for him to turn my water into wine. I can have free parties all night.

  • This dude sucks on babies.

    WHAT A GROSS GUY.

  • This guy can't be serious!

    

  • Biggest. Troll. Ever. <3

  • sounds like someones a virgin. Btw, he licked the 'baby' and the 'vagine' eew.

  • Adam and Eve isn't a true story. It's impossible for two people to populate the world. Hence why it's illegal to marry your sister. Because the child produced from the reproduction of a brother and sister ends up deformed in some way. So if Adam and Eve created a child or two, then who would they have sex with? Their brother or sister or mother or father. Caused deformations. Sorry to burst your bibble.

  • 1:40 - 1:44

    Was that you contemplating fucking the tomato?

  • Also straight people have anal sex.

  • it doesnt hurt if shes not 10...

    or if youre shane diesel

  • what

    the fuck...

  • This has to be the funniest video I've ever seen and 5 bucks says this guys is a virgin lol. plus he likes putting that spoon in that orange waaaayyy to much.

  • This has to be the funniest video I've ever seen and 5 bucks says this guys is a virgin lol.

  • Christ... I pity the sick woman who marries you. I am sure she rethinks that union if she ever sees this video.

  • @IsisOsiris7 He's satire, like EdwardCurrent xP

  • (only asking because of all of your points of views I've watched haven't touched on that subject) and if it is okay most people "fantasize" is this healthy and clean or is it just considered lust...or are we only supposed to "touch our special gift" while having sex with our husband? I'm really trying to understand your view points here because they are seemingly way off base and all based around yourself essentually.

  • First of...it's not "vaginal" and 2ndly....aren't breasts meant to feed our children, you sound very male chauvinistic. Some women need lubrication regardless, because of health issues, or otherwise, there is usually a grey area in everything you speak of. Also, you say it's okay for a woman to touch her "special gift" from God...does that mean all masterbation is "clean" and okay according to God

  • This gave me the weirdest spoon boner.

  • i think you missed the button saying "Comedy" :D

  • 2:05 -> rapist face

  • wow you sexist ass. evdn if you are trolling.

  • Trolling at it's best.

  • he says he is waiting for marriage to have sex i fear he will never have sex lolz!

  • The way he looks at the tomato. I fear for any tomato he may purchase in the future.

  • I reakon this guy just fucks that hole in the wall

  • 1:41 first time this guy saw a vagina?

    i haven't laughed this hard for ages.

  • This guy is just trolling.

  • I'm sure that you are also the kind of man who objectifies women and believes that they belong in the kitchen tending to the every need of her husband. Any woman who as been told that Sex shouldn't be pleasurable for her has been brainwashed by society. If sex wasn't pleasurable then why would so much of the youthful population be having sex out of marriage?

  • ok honestly i believe homosexuallity is a choice. Its just like how you can change how you like certain types of foods. it all depends on who you want to be in life. however, this guy is REALLY retarded. lmao oh geez but yea im sorry for those who are honest about this. this guy just fucks everything up lmao

  • @A7x2393 We can compare it to food real easily, eat a pile of feces and tell me you had a choice in the matter of gagging it out or being in extreme disgust. Being gay is like wanting to be a vegan, but gag on vegetables instead; so we have to eat meat instead.

  • Mister Jesus-look-alike, didn't you know that vagina runs out of lube eventually as it dries out during longer periods of intercourse..? Another thing you might have missed out on is that women don't feel the pleasure ONLY because of clitoris. As a matter of fact, most of the time during sex penis doesn't even touch the clitoris.

    BTW, clitoris is actually the same as the tip of the penis and both male and female organs look the same at some stage of fetus' development.

    LEARN SOME ANATOMY!

  • Berf

  • This guy is completely delusional and full of shit!

  • @TheAtomicDon And an idiot.

  • Why is it necessary for a guy to be pleasured?

  • this guy is a virgin. he'd know that after the girl's first time, it doesn't hurt anymore. wow.

  • @tkdeviant It can still hurt. If the guy is too large, if the girl is too small, if you've had too much sex and you're chaffed, if you have sex for too long and naturally stop producing lube, if the guy is too aggressive, and sometimes just certain positions are uncomfortable and even painful.

  • I believe that men who are gay haven't got a choice in the matter same with lesbians

  • I started laughing at "heres a woman do... do that", i dont believe in god but this guy is hilarious.

  • he doesn't want to like the clitoris? I hope no one ever licks his penis again!!!!!

  • I meant LICK.......

  • this guy is a virgin.

  • Hahahahaha

  • Thank goodness this douche has stopped making videos.

  • @Bluebelle9289 But then where will I get my entertainment?

  • @MySpaceBarsBroken0o

    Watch porn like everyone else.

  • @Bluebelle9289 I already do that, but that's more for pleasure than entertainment.

  • @Bluebelle9289 He's not a real theist, you know?

  • @LogicStance

    He's still a douche.

  • "I wonder how Jesus would feel about 'Licking It'????!!!!"

    Had to pause for a REAL ROTFL fit.

  • You are either a seasoned troll of the dumbest motherfucker the planet

  • Are you very good comedian or really stubid and sovinist pig?

  • So its ok for a woman who you're supposed to love and care about to be in pain while you're getting pleasure? That's terrible, you're disgusting.

  • "the woman is created for the mans pleasure" :(

  • Jesusophile? Jesus-ophile... Your a pedo for jesus?

  • @xxxxtokishonexxxx Come on don't be an idiot, it means Jesus-lover. Philos means love in another language, pedophiles love children, philosophy is a love of wisdom, etc. Don't be stupid.

  • @Jesusophile I know your vids are suppose to be funny, but they aren't. You should stop making videos about religion, homosexuals, birth defects, etc... because it isn't funny and a lot of people think that you are serious. In case you don't understand what I'm saying, I'll put it this way -- you aren't funny, you suck.

  • Look at him stare into that vagina...

    Also, I was waiting for the spoon to go completely through the orange. I love this guy.

  • the title cracks me up.

  • definitely not trolling, since his other videos are similar. please go die

  • @crazyaboutthewoman

    this is satire. you're an idiot.

  • this guy has never gotten laid and never will

  • I heard Eve loves it up the shitter.

  • Is this comedy?

  • i bet he is REALLY atheist.

  • @Sh1r0Sh3nG - I bet you're right.

    His videos are parodies of christian fundamentalists. The rambling illogical connections they make.

    Keep up the good work Jesusphile.

  • @Sh1r0Sh3nG - I bet you're right.

    His videos are parodies of christian fundamentalists. The rambling illogical connections they make.

    Keep up the good work Jesusophile.

  • hahahhahahahahhahahahahahahhah­ahahahahahahaaa

  • satire retards. FUCKING SATIRE!!!!!!!

  • I think by watching this my IQ dropped a few points.........

  • umm... Yeah have you ever heard of the brain? that is where pain comes from ideot

  • dont ask him to lick, just play with it.

    he is prophet

  • wow there are no words to describe wut a stupid piece of crap you are

  • No, it hurts soo good.

    The sperm does not initially go into the womb.

  • No, it hurts soo good.

  • lol

  • each otter

  • I think he used to be gay, just watch his gestures in the videos. If I had to live my life married to a woman because being gay is a sin, I'd rather die than eat a pussy. I think you need to be put on medication.

  • i think this video proves that evolution works. This man's brain clearly isnt evolved therefore NO woman in her right mind will want to reproduce with him (unless he rapes someone? :S)

  • @SLeXii You understand he's trolling/taking the piss/winding you up/not being DEADLY SERIOUS right?

  • Vagina's have a skin covering that the penis has to break through? Interesting.

  • @TomsFriendKake Please tell me you're not honestly that ignorant. It's called a hymen.

  • @Jesusophile If you are not joking in this video then you are a sick sack of crap. I hope you get raped without lube so you can know the pain you are advocating for women.

  • @TheAnubisDrake

    He's not serious. Trust me. It's embarrassing for me to admit but he fooled me the first time I found his videos.

  • he is got great points so EFF yall

  • this guy has great points, so EFFIN shut up

  • @STEVENtheBEASTgamer Just how does this guy have "great points"?

    EVERYTHING he says is uneducated and incorrect. I think he was dropped on his head when he was little.

  • @vanizorc

    LOL. Then he fooled you like he fooled me the first time I saw one of his videos. He's not serious at all.

  • You have seriously got to be THE stupidest person I've ever seen. Congrats!

  • Too funny! Only true professional youtube satirists will have more dislikes than likes on their videos.

  • HILARIOUS! Probably the best laugh I've had in years. Seriously, I almost peed my pants I laughed so hard!

  • you look like the popular modern rendition of jesus.

  • YOU SEXIST PIG BASTARD

  • @tivolife0509 Hey, your so wrong. Your probably really weird and dont listen to God OR jesus. You dont know anything at all. All Jesusophile is preaching teh bible. WHICH IS PROVED BECAUSE GOD SAYS ITS TRUE. It makes sense what he is saying. Woman are more sinfull and thats science

  • @DRATER469 Lmao, hes fucking with people. Actually I'm pretty sure Jesusophile is atheist to the extreme. Jokes on you my friend.

  • @bellona6356 Is it really? well you have truely placed metaphorical egg on my face. You should think of going into comedy, your ability to recognise satire is uncanny...

  • @DRATER469 Yeah I get what you're saying is satire and Jesus does it better.

  • @bellona6356 I was just being annoying to a girl whos created a video against Jesusophile, that he liked, so was reffering to his satire and your pride in recognising it. Also Jesus is great at all things and so is probably the funniest man in the world, with satire second to none. One day i want to be jesus but i think ive started a bit late, having already been born NOT the son of god.

  • The worst part is i don't think he's a troll.

    Hey buddy, I'm female, and sex is AWESOME. If sex hurts, ur doin' it wrong.

    p.s wow what a fuggin VIRGIN.

  • I've only watched the first minute of this video, and you sir are an asshole.

  • "he doesnt want to have his nose up there, cut him some slack"

    I want to have my nose up there.....

  • it sounds like you're a pro-rape kind of guy

  • I smell a troll.

  • Am I the only one who gets that this is satiric?

  • @MariusBorjans it is so not. HE IS A DOUCHEBAG

  • what the helllllllllll? that is reversed logic, that is ridiculous.

  • 1637 get proper sex! lool!

  • Oh my fuck. What the hell are you talking about? Just...you need to stop. Like stat.

  • 7 minutes of my life wasted :(

  • LOOL well i wasted about 100000000000000000000000000000­00000000000000000000++++++ trillion sperm cells :/

  • I love the baby accent

  • haha, your a douche

  • top tier troll

  • WOMEN BECOME LESBIANS BECAUSE THEY DON'T LIKE MEN. WHY DO YOU THINK THAT EVERYTHING IS ABOUT MEN? WOMEN ARE HUMAN BEINGS CREATED BY GOD ALSO. EVE WAS CREATED FOR ADAM BUT YOU CAN'T GO ON ASSUMING THAT ALL WOMEN WERE CREATED FOR MEN. YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING. EVERYTHING YOU HAVE IN YOUR LITTLE BRAIN IS BULLSHIT.

  • @MicaelaEstabillo

    i completely agree with you.

    this guy is full of shit and frustrating i just wasted 7 minutes of my life!

  • SEX IS NOT ONLY ABOUT THE MAN'S PLEASURE. THERE ARE ACTUALLY MEN IN THE WORLD WHO CARE ABOUT THEIR PARTNERS' PLEASURE. THOSE MEN ARE NOT DOUCHEBAGS LIKE YOU.

  • Have you ever had sex with anything besides your hand? It seems that you don't have enough experience with real women or men. YOU ARE A BIG ASSHOLE. YOU DO NOT HAVE A PENIS. YOU DO NOT KNOW ANYTHING. SHUT UP, BITCH.

  • This is a stupid video. You're a sexist piece of shit. Shut up please. You obviously don't know anything about what you're talking about.

  • This is a stupid video. You're a sexist piece of shit. Shut up please. You obviously don't know anything about what you're talking about.

  • Um.. an asshole on a woman makes it a female organ. What kind of organ is it? Or who's is it? I mean are you trying to tell me that a girl's anus isn't female?... Are you retard? Oh, no that's right, you're just religious (aka the same thing as retarded). Btw I take it you're never really talked to anyone who's had anal-sex. That 'pain' you speak of, sort of a myth if you do it right. Strange how I've never had a girl look up at me and say, "Hey Mark, that kinda feels like I'm dying inside."

  • Breasts are not there for the sexual pleasure of men they are there so she can feed her potential babies and it has been proven that there is a gene that causes homosexuality. And we really don't want to waist seed because the world totally is not over populated.

  • He (I'm not sure what creature is in this video and what "it's" gender is ) will die alone for sure.

    Reasons:

    1) He doesn't want to give any sexual pleasure to women.

    2) Well, he is trying to convince everyone that he is gay (but he totally looks like one).

    Dude I am straight and believe in god but I can't even think of believing the crap you are talking about. (Which btw I don't think you yourself understand.)

    Good luck ruining your life.

    If you want my advice "Go meet a psychiatrist !"

  • im sorry dude but 1 you have no fuckin clue what your talking about do you XD your a moronic dumbass... if your god existed then why is sin still in existance! ....2 .... vaginal sex hurts because of the hymen ripping after that it should be fine...3.... anal sex doesnt hurt after the first time 2 so yeah ..... learn the facts dumbass ....i hope i have destroyed your answers and btw ....dumbass THE VAGINA GIVES PLEASURE TO THE WOMAN TOO !!!!... ty for your reading because youve learned you suck

  • I hate to break it to ya, "Jesusophile," but comedy is not your forte. Neither is persuasive argument.

    And I'm pretty sure you just inadvertently revealed yourself to be a major dud in the sack.

  • WHAT THE FUCK 

  • o-o Giving birth to child hurts like hell cuz its another human being coming out of a small opening.. NOT CUZ EVE ATE THE APPLE YA JESUS WANNA BE!

  • i think he is being sarcastic.

    well, i hope so.

  • it's sad when retarded people try to preach, he makes me sad

  • and one more thing a women just doesnt lay their she isnt a sex slave you know.she is a person with feelings and needs pleasure to and she is not meant to jus reciv the sperm. she is having sex raw bc she wants to get pregnote or she just wants it to feel good.omg you need some sex and im a virgin to and only 16 and kno more then you.go to a health class MR. and their is nothing wrong with gay sex you need to stop judging

  • i kno im late and all but im gay and i dont think it should be really talked about.and yes sex is meant to be plesurable. its not extra when her G spot is hit she will have an orgy.so i think u need to do some facts im just saying. and lubracent is needed for vaginal sex to. it helps to relive pain.

  • I think I may subscribe to you because you are so stupidly funny. (The clitoris is a gift that God gave to them HAHHHH XDDD)

  • You are a fucking jack ass. I hope you die of cancer.

  • wait a second... ok so he said in the other video about homosxuality that it goes against evolution etc and they couldn't get children blah blah but now he says that giving birth is a "sign from god to give the woman pain"??

    WTF!! so you're saying that both things are bad? omg i would really like to write so much about you and critizise... but well if you really believe in what you say and think about god, good for you, but stop annoying the world with your fucked up videos, please.

  • he said fagina

  • okay, bro, here's some science for you. there is a part of your brain that's called the INAH3. look it up. Also, women were not "made" for men. when YOU were in your mother's womb, you were originally female. that is, until hormones and genetics kicked in that coated your brain in testosterone.

    anyways, my point is:

    people are born gay. women are not made lesbians because they have been disappointed by men. anal sex feels good because of the prostate.

  • @DaturaInoxxia vaginal sex only hurts a woman if you're doing something wrong. So, i don't know why you feel it's necessary to disseminate misogyny unto the public. Furthermore, god does not exist, and when you die nothing happens.

  • He just ate a baby.