SMBC Theater - Gender Negotiation

[insaninater]

god is such a troll :))

[magicpeach2011]

god that woman on the right has the worst mustache i've ever seen. I think she's on the wrong side of the table

[celestialsalamander]

offer to let him have the penis, then touch him on the penis.

[MrZanav]

my favorite sketch!

[Ravenmeister999]

pause at 2:15, you'll thank me later

[chinesemonk]

Death, war, and ass hair

[ieatpilli]

And so it has been ever since...

[noobsdotcom]

@gurckenhamster, she is saying "I'll just leave ass of here unless" then zach says "we want that"

[cfausnau]

@noobsdotcom I think she says "ass hair"

[nemzalnzood]

@noobsdotcom "ass hair"

[gurkenhamster]

what does zach say at 2:00 ? Yes, we want the... what?

[piglatin123]

@gurkenhamster Yeah... I didn't understand that either...

[mgott1992]

Zach is so attractive... :)

[Portlandhardstylers]

5"? HAHA!

[turfele]

@Portlandhardstylers Haha quite indeed

[r3bol]

Hmmm... When I was really young, this is kind of like how I thought a person came to be.

You would be standing there in the clouds and the angel would be asking you a series of questions. Your answers would influence the choices of the options in the next questions. I think you even got to pick your parents based on this too.

At the end of it, you where basically given a summery of who you were and sent off to live in utero.

It was my earliest memory and I have no idea when it was.

[boeweizer]

and then there were hermaphrodites

[DarthJackson2]

1:35, rape face.

[ZombehWolf]

You're so fucked face, 2:18

[Sanshaino]

"That was weird."

My puberty, summed up in one sentence.

[mozzarrella]

GODDAMMIT ZACH, MY ASSHAIR IS ALL YOUR FAULT!

[oraclecrank]

COVERED IN PATCHY HAIR

[ilovemusicWIKA]

one of the best!

[wickedjeffmach]

One of the first times I've actually found myself spontaneously clapping at the end of a YouTube video.

[jimmayl1]

What happened to 3:22?

[BarneysanchezDH]

One of the girls..doesn't look like a girl..

[LWS0123]

feels like i'm wearing nothing at all...

nothing at all...

nothing at all...

[MicrowavedBacon]

@LWS0123 Ned Flanders ftw

[iknowmy3table]

DAM YOU ASS HAIR!!!!!!

[Uktrayf]

Covered in patchy hair!

...Right?

Covered!

[NVSBLmonstr]

I'm disappointed in the mangling of those Zentai suits... and I'd fuck that angel. Just saying.

[ZehEduardo]

zach's facial expressions are remarkable.

[AndreasSudihardjo]

Imagine a 5 inch clitoris

[percifield13]

this mustache girl is really disgusting

[GBart]

The coin says "One cent, which I am totally, totally good for" on it backwards.

[VVi8]

There is dirt or some shit on your camera lens. You can tell in just about every shot. There is a smudge.

[BishopBlackhand]

I like how you can't really tell JP is missing some digits in this one.

[esuflek]

Girl on the right MUSTACHE WAX PLEASE!!!

[PureLiberalFire]

"How will [the males] ever act rationally?" Yes, indeedy! ;-)

[DarthJackson2]

They decided to not give JP fingers on his right hand.

[Fallen8800]

"Covered."

[HarlotBug3]

O.M.Genius!

[Padboy]

That peppy angel annoys the shit out of me.

[Goldbloodeddragon]

Give him a penis, touch him on the penis.

[hahaha133452]

@Goldbloodeddragon god giveth and god touch him on the penis

[Shrededwings]

@Goldbloodeddragon what is up with all the "touch his penis" comments on these vids?

[teeno4ka]

@Shrededwings it's from the sketch 'The cosmotopian'

[Shiizi]

@Shrededwings its from another vid they have made

[EccoTheDolphin]

Let the males have the penis in gender negociation, touch him on the penis.

[Vi3009]

" what is wrong with childborn?"

"Here is the photografy"

"AHHHHH!"

XD

[gofojibwas]

haha, two-dimensional coin

[JuicyChina]

WTF!! YOUR A SLUT, IM SORRY, BEST FRIENDS LMAO!!!

[Youtomia]

Genius! xD This was so lulzy.

[captainwillies69]

1:55 what?

[gofojibwas]

@captainwillies69 "That does it for the physical stuff, I'll just leave off ass hair if nobody wants it."

[bella1o1o]

@captainwillies69 she said "i'll just leave off ass hair

male 2: no we want that

male1: no!

angel: alright then

so men get ass hair XD

[RomanoGiovanni]

You get a little copy of yourself.

[Chucktanium]

Balls: You are willing to do something

Boobs: You can make someone else do it for you

[jennapinkh]

one of your best yet! loved it

[Mattmoo36]

Pick a winner, touch him on the penis, repeat over the course of humanity's existence (more or less).

[Gibbingslfc]

You guys are awesome

[opcn18]

What's the deal with the double sided tape down the side of her face?

[ocopli1]

great punchline

[gaboleon]

What? Full body catsuit and no James? I'm disappointed.

[Baalsaack]

@gaboleon I, on the other hand, am happy whenever there is a video without James.

[pliskin100]

Death and war. Ad homenim. Touch him on the penis.

[EssThree]

Oh man, that ending I did not expect. Nice :D

[Link7882]

Quite possibly the best SMBC short yet.

[Hisharu]

As thumbs up number 666, I am obliged to suggest a sequel in which we see Satan's debate of sins. Good acting, but I agree that the joke at 2:00 was somewhat incomprehensible.

[shill8989]

Felicity had the funniest reactions to everything.

[caveman73]

Awesome

[Elephantintheroom01]

2:55 Once cent, which i am totally totally good for.

[Elephantintheroom01]

This is the best.

[Kaluriel]

watch fight to the death, then touch winner on the penis

[Lollocide]

@Kaluriel

And evolution is born.

[dudeofstuff]

I can't figure out what she says at 2:00. "I'll leave off ass here if nobody" ... ???

[randmajere]

@dudeofstuff ass hair

[CutlassJustice]

@dudeofstuff ill leave off ass hair if nobody.... YES we want that

[maningreen15]

@dudeofstuff Hair, ass hair.

[AssCutter]

5 inch clitoris FTW

[michaelcadilhac]

That would have been better with a good microphone. Or good articulation...

[moobface12345]

lololololololololol

[reNINTENDO]

Bargain to not get the penis, touch him on the penis.

[ExtremeSquared]

I really hope you got a greenman suit when you ordered those ridiculous things.

[sanarkhos]

only 5 inches?

[LotsOMovies]

@sanarkhos Wikipedia says most are about 5 inches long. If that sounds small to you, perhaps the sample set from which you derive this conclusion is limited in some way to above-average lengths.

[fsfsfsfsfsfsg]

13 Femails weren't happy they didn't got erections..

[UtopiaV1]

Get a penis, touch him on the penis... ah, hang on... ¬_¬

[Oddtwang]

Put on a weird body suit, touch him on the five-inch-long clitoris.

[plutopsyche]

Wow, that was not even remotely entertaining. No cheers for sexism.

[TomSFox]

But the females clearly have boobies already!

[78cymru]

Awesome - we got death and war and pwned them on child birth. High 5!

[Bravebannana]

omg one of those females looks like a shemale

[EvansRowan123]

This makes so much sense, i almost became a creationist just then.

:p

[QuatroDiablo]

wait, so angels use euros?

[darkula666]

5inch long clit XD

[VulpesAnonymous]

What is she saying at 1:59? "We'll just leave off ??? if nobody--"

[DemonicWoofy]

@VulpesAnonymous Ass hair. :P

[themonsean]

@VulpesAnonymous they said ass hair. Took me a 2ed look to hear it.

[nutellaontoast]

I know,let's take an old joke and remake it with annoying ugly suits and horrible deliverty and then stretch it out forever.

We are comedic genius! HIGH FIVES!

[WizToast]

@nutellaontoast OUR DELIVERTY WAS PERFERCT!

[nutellaontoast]

@WizToast See, that was really good the way you put it in caps. You should be in a band, man!

[Zralf]

funny one, was so good that i'd be happy to see a sequel of it. let's saaay the races, as in the branches of human colour and culture

[Monkeyboy92037]

best one in awhile

[rubiximus]

Claim boobs for yourself, touch him on the five-in-long clitoris.

[nohohongs]

this one was ultra awesome.

[mlaudonio]

you really should start talk more clearly... I couldn't understand most of the jokes even after several times I heard them.

[zporkz]

@mlaudonio I had no problem understanding them.

[ShadowLord18181]

No offense, but compared to usual, you guys were in a bit of a rut, however this one was well done and clever, Therefore, thumbs up :D

[flyingmojo1]

Fight to the death, touch him on the penis.

[Chasmodius]

So that was... Adam, Steve, Eve, and Lilith?

The ladies really had their characters down, by the way.

[cyncmaster150]

Put him in a full body suit, touch him on the penis.

[kilmindaro3]

this one hurt.

[KevinADCarter]

The timing of the screams was perfect.

[shikatronas]

Very great, very original. I like it

[LightningHammer]

Death in war! Death in war!  Fu'yeah

[ninodoko]

awesoooome

[repzyree]

get breasts, then tutch him on the penis

[defaultedninja]

Best one in awhile!

[valeriereified]

Thank you modern medical science for allowing us to have boobs and erections at the same time.

Laser to deal with the ass hair too.

[SolidFake]

sooo, god has boobs AND testicles?

ermm, welll....how do I ask this?

Are they...you know...are they in the same places as on humans?

[strayjohno]

Don't forget pissing standing up! We totally owned them on that one, amirite fellas?

[ChalktheChase]

@strayjohno Nah, girls can do that too, it's just slightly harder to aim.

[strayjohno]

@ChalktheChase Gross.

[shikatronas]

@strayjohno u rite

[mrpwase]

Ye're back on form.

[entrando2]

"One cent,

which I am

totally

/totally/

good for."

[Raphaelus13]

zentai.. mmMMMmmm

[DevonHartigan]

SMBC you are on a roll of funnyness at the moment.

[the1javb]

amazing ending :D

[Graehaus]

Awesome video. The suits were pretty neat. Added this weird quota to it. LOL

[pugay69]

The comic is so much better.

[lordnocturne7]

Fight to the death... touch him on the penis.

[buttercake4]

Tails never fails.

[Zincon48]

Those giant condom/lycra suit thingy's seem to be taped on.

Couldn't have sprung for the full body suit with a good hood...

[YRJ42]

Really well written - keep it up, folks!

[Hubris12]

Seriously, it should be illegal to be this funny. Keep up the good work! :)

[Cleric2145]

Great success! :)

[439613]

That ending was pretty epic

[507cballard]

WTF did she say at 1:57???

[Nidht]

@507cballard I, too, would like to know...

[Cleric2145]

@507cballard "I'll just leave off ass-hair if nobody wants it."

[deiXmachinis]

@507cballard I want to know too :c

[Kakamoga]

swing and a miss

[bbrake]

lol, your jokes at the end are always great! Keep turning out youtube vids, I'll keep wathing them!

And somebody or another will buy your merchandise, making it worthwhile.

[Cleverconveyence]

Make him fight to the death, touch him on the penis.

[i0npath]

Best.Vid.Ever.

[Fallen8800]

Someone needs to clean their lens.

[SandersXD]

I'll just leave ____ ____ here then

Anyone catch that?

[ComancheKnight]

@SandersXD I believe she said "ass hair."

...unfortunately.

[ComancheKnight]

0:45 "...COVERED." Favorite part. lol

[serendipity723]

I liked this one,

Are those morph suits?

[arailyra]

"Fight to the death! The winner gets sex." Favorite line. Super creative, guys. Enjoyed. :)

[econojon]

@arailyra ...and then touch him on the penis

[drunkenbozo1994]

HAHAHAHAHA 1:34

[traltixx]

Where did you guys get the suits? I would like to..emm..try them on?

[ZMoreland04]

God only has two dangling parts? So...He has a small penis?

[windexglow]

1 : Get boobs

2: touch him on the penis

[geoffreyhuntley]

always lots of promise and creativity...just not delivered well, again. But these sketches do make you think...haha

[smelliex3]

HAAAHAH LOVED THE PART ABOUT FRIENDSHIPS.

"Why didn't we anticipate that?!"

"Because you're not pretty enough!"

hehehehe.

[AustinLawicki]

Angel: "Who wants death and war, and who wants millennia of being the major caretaker of toddlers?"

Males: "DEATH AND WAR! DEATH AND WAR!"

lol!...

[shinew123]

that was amazing. suits a little weird, but amazing nonetheless. You never fail to make me laugh. Love the end.

[Vacheresseb]

Really clever premise. Good work Zach.

I mean lol.

[ethanB612]

29 people missed the thumbs down button.

[jarowilson]

@ethanB612 oops i missed again...shut up

[democritic]

@ethanB612 Found it.

[tnucaturner]

@ethanB612 Didn't miss it on downvoting this comment =D

[soulhunter4444]

I love how the suggest that God is a woman.

@soulhunter4444 Actually it suggests that god gets the best stuff, and apparently erections AND boobs are the best.

Draw whatever conclusions you want from there.