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From: ComedyJesus
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  • wasn't jesus socialist ?

  • boo hoo poor jesus ... i'd have kicked his teeth in then he'd have sounded more like this on the cross "bader day bow na wha bay bo" that would have cracked everyone up, would have made for a fun afternoon, watching him pretending to die, a proper david blane trick! i'd have written on the sign over his head "king of the poo's" much more funny,you got to lighten the mood on such a grey day!

  • not to mention a father torturing and killing "his only son"...

    you know, because he's god.

  • it was his choice, no one made God do it but Himself.

    Secondly it was a chariable act not a socialistic act, If you give homeless your bread you are a saint, if you give the homeless your neighbor's bread you are a socialist. That is not to say that socialism is bad it is valid if you know what it truely is.

  • Yeah but put yourself in the a private construction companies shoes. They could make the roads, but government tells them "No, you can't make a profit fairly, we make the decisions around here." I garuentee that if you were the construction worker, you'd change your mind about socialism like the hypocrits the left wings are.

  • I don't get it either.

  • socialism sounds like a bad idea from your perspective, at your house with your job and your healthcare

    but for the millions of homeless it sounds pretty good

    when people are dieing like they are the choice is obvious

  • socialism sounds like a bad idea from your perspective as well. There is no need to go handing out healthcare to people with no quality of life. We need mass executions of the homeless, unemployed, and the terminally ill. Population control is the only solution all our problems.

  • Who pays for you road you idiot.

    The government? THAT's SOCIALISM!!!!

    Quick, burn all the cars!!!!!!!!!

    (p.s. be more specific, and learn what words mean)

    (p.p.s. Jesus is a myth)

  • @sagarat your funny you know that?

  • i dont get it?

  • conservatives are retarded

  • O.K. white Jesus. I'm pretty sure Jesus was a big fan of socialism. I can't remember him saying, "I got mine Jack".

  • Since when was Jesus American?

  • If one or two people believe a delusion, it's called "insanity." If a million people believe a delusion, it's called "religion."

  • belief in god = epic fail

    belief in science = FTW

    :D no god

  • @Gestaposaurus christianity and science are not in tension, some of the greatest scientists were religious. Do not mention Galileo, he was their Glen Beck, annoying and undipomatic

  • @threecards333 yes, people from before there was tension between religion and the whole of science were often religious. so? that says nothing about the fact the science and christianity are in conflict.

  • Jesus WAS a socialist. It's a beautiful argument that the religious right refuse to recognize. I defy any christian conservative to refute the claim that their savior was a socialist.

  • Well, Conservapedia is currently trying to rewrite the bible to remove any references to a socialist Jeebus--I kid you not.

  • @VesusSheist Jesus said "don't steal". There, I refuted you and I'm not even a christian conservative. What do you say now, tough guy? Huh?

  • @GreyAutumn And? How does that refute anything about my comment?

  • @VesusSheist Taxes, specially when overdone = theft. I'm not Jesus would be okay with that.

  • @GreyAutumn Unfortunately, taxation is necessary to maintain public institutions. Libraries, roads, police and fire departments, etc. And religious people should really shut the fuck up about taxes, considering that the government DOESN'T tax their churches.

  • @VesusSheist I'm not religious and I didn't argue against taxation. I just said that Jesus couldn't have been a socialist because he was against theft and taxation is mass theft. Also, libraries, roads and fire departments could be privatized(not saying that they should but they could) and some would argue even the police. So it's not as "necessary" as you want it to be.

  • @VesusSheist most churches use the donations given to maintain their building and help those in need. Most money collected are controbutions not fees, next you would suggest taxing hopeline, world vision, salvation army?

  • @threecards333 The organizations you mention (salvation army, etc.) are charities. Churches are NOT charities. They can be CHARITABLE...but they aren't charities. They can do whatever they hell they want with the money they receive from credulous numbskulls.

    Until the government taxes churches, religious people should simply keep their mouths shut about taxes in this country.

  • @GreyAutumn give to caesars what is caesars

  • @VesusSheist see my comment, it is quite simple. There is a large distiction between mercy and socialism. But the early church was a commune akin to that of the 18th century anarchists dreams, except it faded because of constatine's actions.

    Yes, we ought have a theocratic socialist government. Where we provide for the sick and weak of faith.

  • @VesusSheist no he is not, charity is what he promoted, not state socialism, Charity is volinteerist, socialism is forced, that is the distiction. If you define socialism as helping the poor, then he would be, but if you define socialism as state socialism then he is not.

  • @threecards333 Jesus told us that we should sell our belongings and give the money to the poor. That's socialist. And i hope you were kidding about your comment that we should have a theocratic government for those who are "weak of faith"...that's insanity.

  • @VesusSheist Politically either I am a libertarian, seperating morality and state or a christian socialist combining the two. And read my previous post, chariable actions are not socialism. Either I use all of the biblical teaching for the guidance of civic or non, anything else is hypocritical. Jesus may be a socialist it comes down to the difinition that you are using,

  • @threecards333 "Charitable actions are not socialism"

    When the son of god demands that you give your money to the poor, it's not charity. It's divine fiat. There is no such thing as free will for a christian that truly believes the bible. There are only directives from god. I'm getting a little off topic, but libertarianism and christianity are diametrically opposed.

    There is no freedom when a magical deity can send you to eternal torture for not believing in his existence.

  • @VesusSheist well, you obviously see personal, public and civic spheres as the same, hence with that view yes Jesus is a socialist. I personally apply God's will in my personal life, but not in my civic views. If I go with your view, yes I would be a christian socialist. There is civic freedom, public freedom, and private freedom. I believe in civic and public freedom, but for me there is no personal freedom.

  • @VesusSheist As for "There is no freedom when a magical deity can send you to eternal torture for not believing in his existence." yes, He created us and can decide to do what ever He desires with us, does a car have freedom, when you built it?

  • @threecards333

    You can't compare a manmade object to a living being.

  • @NUTCASE71733, I am saying that we are to God as a car is to us

  • Comment removed

  • @NUTCASE71733

    You have no evidence for that. Besides, a car is a nonliving thing. Your argument fails.

  • @VesusSheist John 18: 36 "My Kingdom is not of this world." Jesus was neither a socialist nor a facist nor did He ascribe to any political ideology. Jesus had no preference for any sort of earthly government. Socialism requires an active and over-reaching government. Jesus was not a socialist. Christians don't run from that argument at all. The claim that Jesus was a socialist is completely baseless.

  • @MackLeeGreen Socialism: noun. a system of social organization that advocates vesting the ownership and control of production, capital, etc. in the community as a whole.

    This says nothing about "earthly" or "over-reaching" government.

    "..it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven.." Mark 10:24

    "..sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will find treasure in heaven.." Matthew 19:21 (NIV)

  • @VesusSheist And what sort of "system" do you think that definition refers to?? Socialism by it's nature is a political system. Whether it is from a formal government or not it is a system that mandates the sharing of wealth. Such a system demands at least some sort of authority base to govern the wealth distribution. It doesn't need to say "earthly" that goes without saying. This has nothing to do with wealth or poverty. Of course Jesus calls us to share with each other...

  • @VesusSheist But He does not call us to be coerced or compelled to give. A system that mandates the sharing of wealth, even in the most harmonious of conditions, involves people being compelled to give. Jesus never condoned such a system. Those verses you cite are about people giving up their posessions, not for socialism but so they can follow Jesus. Those verses actually (when not ripped out of context) just reinforce my point that Jesus doesn't ascribe to any earthly political system.

  • @VesusSheist You seem to equate an opposition to socialism with an opposition to charity. Not at all. I simply recognize that real charity comes from the heart not from a state-run system that mandates giving.And that is what I am getting at when I say Jesus was not a socialist (nor a capitalist or an adherent to any other sort of political or economic system)

    2 Cor. 9

    7 Each one must give as he has decided in his heart, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.

  • @MackLeeGreen The bible basically says that you aren't welcome in heaven unless you give your worldly possessions to the needy. You get punished eternally for not following those rules.

    If that isn't a "mandate", I don't know what is. If that isn't "compelling" his followers to give, I don't know what it is.

    And by definition, god IS a dictator that runs a socialist government.

  • @VesusSheist That is a mandate from God, thus Jesus says His Kingdom is NOT of this world. Socialism is a worldly system that often leads to tyranny, thus Jesus was not, nor will He ever be a socialist. The fact that you think He is just exposes your complete inability to properly exegete the Bible. Mandates from God are law. Paul says that the law exists to expose sin and thus drive people to faith in Christ (as opposed to themselves) not as blueprints for worldly governments.

  • @MackLeeGreen Just because Jesus never came out and said , "I'm a card carrying socialist", does not mean that he did not espouse the ideals of socialism.

    But enlighten me: What is the difference between a mandate from god and a mandate from government? (other than the fact that government exists, and god likely does not)

    The bottom line is that god is the most totalitarian dictator IMAGINABLE, yet "small government" conservatives embrace him like a family member.

  • This is how the Jewish Zombie was born.

  • Relax...didn't realize my comment would elicit such...CAPITAL LETTERS:) I apparently missed the mark...I still saw the irony, but with less of an understanding. I'm still willing to hug this whole thing out if you're game.

  • jesus is just as fake as santa clause

    think of it theres a big man in the sky(god)

    theres a man in the north pole(santa)

    you cannot sin or you will go to hell(god)

    you cant act naughty or you will get coal all of christmas(santa)

    condoms are ous savior!!!

  • bullshit!  You can go to italy and see santa's bones. Jesus is way more fake.

  • Ha, took me a second to get the joke. I think I'm just slow tonight. XD

  • Our "sins" are still here, so Jesus didn't rid of them.

    to male someone else pay for one's wrongdoings is one of the most immoral things one could do.

    christianity is a JOKE

  • country wasn't founded on Jesus

    capitalsm is NOT an ethical system

  • FREEEEEEEEEDOOOOOOOOM!!!!!

  • you must be reading a different bible.

  • I think I just took the irony in a different direction.

  • Actually, Jesus was a socialist. I mean, all the stuff about giving to the poor, how rich people can pretty much never get to heaven, its not exactly anywhere near a capitalist thought process.

  • I def. see where ur coming from. Makes more sense the 2nd time around:)

  • He said that to please the poor masses, obviously, it appeals to them and gives his cult more support... right?

    Capitalism is a fair system, as long as you're willing to work.

  • My comment wasn't meant to support either system, merely to show that Jesus had a socialist view. I really don't care what Jesus thought.

  • Capitalism is a fair system?

    Really?

    I guess your boss should set 18 hour work days and pay you 25 cents an hour, or hire children that are 10 and 11 because they are cheaper than adults. I guess pure Capitalism with no boundaries is really fair.

    Don't we study 19th century history any more? WTF?

  • I do wonder, how did socialism work out for places like Russia, Zanzibar, UK, etc...

    Don't we study 19th century history anymore? WTF?

  • Don't confuse communism with socialism now, all the western europian countries seem to be doing just fine with it, better schools, better healthcare, even better democracies under the parliamentary system.

    By GOD if Rush tells you otherwise, it must be.

    What the Hell do you think made Marx and Lenin rise if it wasn't slave drivers in factories. So the pendulum just swung, from one extreme to the other.

    What the fuck would you know anyway?

    A product of 60 years of brainwashing at its best.

  • Better healthcare? The highest percentage of cancer-related deaths in the UK is from having to wait beyond a medically logical period of time for treatment. They get you to a doctor in two weeks - - they don't give you treatment in two weeks.

    Marx never "rose", communism would have never spread were it not for Russia. Lenin, on the other hand, only got support to rebel because the Tsarist government was so pisspoor.

    Stop getting butthurt and think. :x

  • Actually the UK ranks above us in healthcare, and god forbid you get sick here and don't have insurance, there goes your life, savings and everything else you've worked for your whole life.

    Tsar was an excuse, it was the slave drivers that sparked a world wide revolt against 19th century industruial owners.

    You ever heard of May day, it's cellebrated accros the world, except in the US, we gave it our own name and date. Why is it cellebrated, and sure as heck it wasn't because of Marx

  • Son, you're clever and smart, but idealistic too, don't worry wisdom comes with age. That is why you only see 17-14 year old suicide bombers, once you hit that 25 you're not as idealistic any more.

    Nobody saying a contriolled capitalism is bad, but pure capitalism is as destructive and parasitic as communism. If you get controlled capitalism you end up with a form of socialism, stop associating it only with the Russian commies.

    I'ts a lot more complex than that.

  • correction: 17 to 24 year olds

  • I like what you wrote it's very amusing. Socialism and Communism are not insults, Neither is Russian.

  • Jesus is the biggest monopoly you can find.

  • Jesus loved prophets!

  • Oh, I get it!.... it's ~ironic~

  • wtf??? xD

  • lol

  • Brilliant! I'm passing this on. LOL

  • Beautiful!

  • Awesome!!!!!

  • Stop single-payer.... LOL

  • Wow, i had to watch that twice before i got it, well done Comedy Jesus!

  • that was fucking hilarious

  • ahahahahaha

    NICE

  • Eh?

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