Atheist Church Oct. 11, 2009 The Monkey Song

[rkyobo]

From Gallup polls: There has been surprisingly little change over the last 24 years in how Americans respond to the question of evolution: Between 44% and 47% of Americans have consistently agreed with the third alternative, that God created human beings in their present form within the last 10,000 years or so. Between 35% and 40% agree that man evolved with God's guidance, while between 9% and 13% believe that man evolved, but with no guidance from God. You athiests are in the minority -Sorry!

[rkyobo]

I remember seeing this sung by some kids on Jerry Falwell's Sunday AM service one week, and then later someone who visited our church also performed it. It's a cute song, and tells the truth - and for the person who mentioned "brainwashing", what does he think is happening RIGHT NOW in our public school system?? Free thought? Why aren't the schools presenting Creationism as an alternative to the THEORY of evolution? I'll tell you why - it's because Intelligent Design makes a lot more sense!

[LouisPlume]

Any one know how I can licence this song for a film being made.

[ForeverAnalog]

Its funny how they call it "free thought" when its really just the same thinking as everyone else in the world. I dont see how the atheist movement is "free thought".

[IamLiterallyRetarded]

@ForeverAnalog It's free in that there is no worry of "Mind Police" gods that are peeking at your thoughts and judging you for them.

[grubyub]

last comment awesome

[Xinadium]

whoooaaa I'm not kin the monkey no no no

Is it so wrong that I completely love this?

the monkeys no kin to meeee yeah yeah yeah

[rainyreflections]

lol love the last thing you said, and I was never a fan of kids bop either ;p

[larryishere1]

I've seen it in movies, but i've never seen actual documentation of primates swinging on vines. Do monkeys really swing in trees?

[rkyobo]

@larryishere1 Actually, I was in Thailand, and there were some gibbons (don't know if they are monkeys or apes) that were swinging from electric wires. You can go to my photo. net account and go to animals, and you will see the photo. :)

[sheppaul]

what's scary is that they show us the new trainees

[runallday400j50]

through the whole song, i was actually more worried that the lyrics will fade above ahead of the song. fortunately, it didn't.

[TarsolyGer]

This is really funny... the song itself. Really nice you found it and published it. Now I'm laughing :)

[Queequel]

Good you have become an atheist anyways;) Too many creationists are already too fucked up to ever change their minds..

[Bucketheadcheese]

I love it how the song admits they don't know much about their ancestors... At least that part is sincere.

[Queequel]

Creationist must really suck bad to create a song like this,...............

[sand4839]

... hm why do i get a mental image of an evil preacher with a whip hitting the children when they messeed up or didn't want to sing.

[ihavenospaces]

BEST FUCKING SONG EVER!

nice church once again man

[FreeThinkingCrusader]

I own this album! I live in Lynchburg in Lynchburg, and they play this album at "Doc''s Diner" Doc's referring to Dr. Jerry Falwell. I was eating a philly cheesteak and this song came on, I think its hilarious you made a video about it.

[klfly]

Doc's Diner!!! Wow. Never knew such a place existed. Just looked it up on the miracle of the internet and now I so want to go there!!!

Lots of Vegan options on the menu right?

[FreeThinkingCrusader]

If and when you come its my treat, I will also take you to the Falwell Museum and show you the 4000 year old dinosaur fossil....Totally awesome! Conclusive proof for creation, we can finally start throwing on our pirate regalia and celebrate our Cabolicious Diety.

[stjimmy933499399493]

well i guess farwell had a bit of a freudian slip when he said evolution "refutes" the biblical account of creation, as opposed to disagrees with or opposes, but Refutes? awesome

[tsm124]

LOLOLLOLOLOL i can't stop lauging you topped it off at the end that ish was funny.

[Cyrathil]

Wouldn't the rhyming scheme be better if they said "I don't know much about his ancestry"?

[jjmblue7]

The true irony being that we're STILL monkeys.

[RealityBend]

Girl? Damnit klfly, i thought we agreed on a boy,

DISCUSS THIS WITH ME MORE OFTEN, WHY CAN'T YOU BUY ME NICE THINGS

[kreestor]

I watched this yesterday and had to come back today to let you know that my boyfriend and I could not stop singing that song all night. Can I buy the single?

[klfly]

I KNOW! Me too! I've been singing it non-stop. My wife is going to kill me.

[garydupuis]

Ghastly, yet...catchy, damn them!

[castroherman]

I still swing from trees... :(

[Buschox]

What an awful music :P

The lyrics were hilarious though xD

But yet again, ignorance mostly is :P

[dustonius]

"I don't know much about his ancestors..." Well, obviously!!

If you knew anything about any primate's ancestors you'd know a little about your own.

Just like:

"If you fully understood why you don't believe in all the other religions out there, you'd understand why I don't believe in yours."

[juliuschas]

p.s.: And did I mention, klfly, that our baby girl woke us up at 11:30 p.m. to announce her advent, then kept us waiting till after 2 p.m. the next afternoon? Women! And look out: girls are born knowing how to get their way with Daddy. It's hard-wired by millions of years of wheedling and eyelash-batting.

[juliuschas]

Ah yes, reminds me of all the reasons I couldn't stand Falwell. Did you know his grave at Liberty University is marked with a flaming cross? Anyway, here in Virginia we now have a Republican candidate for governor who has "graduate degrees" from Pat Robertson's "Regent University" (formerly Christian Broadcasting Network University.) Eternal vigilance is the price, I say! And since we are not personally eternal, we need to teach the young 'uns about OUR world views, too.

[pfarabee]

She's keeping everyone waiting? Maybe she can't figure out quite what to wear, or is fussing with her hair? :P

I seriously love that Monkey Song. Something about brainwashed children happily singing songs praising their ignorance.. just brings a tear to the eye.

[SanityInAnarchy]

The funny part is, this part might be right:

"I don't know much about his ancestors, but mine didn't swing from a tree."

Our closest relatives are apes, which are not monkeys, and do not swing from trees.

Yet again: If you want to criticize a theory, take some time to learn about it.

[kopd117]

Chimps don't swing from trees? Maybe not, but they do climb well. And evidence suggests that Ardi, with her opposable big toes, would have felt comfortable climbing trees. But you're right, there's no evidence of swinging.

[TomMSTie]

...The Miracle of Recording.

Right, like recording isn't a result of science.

[Swidhelm]

Shh, might cause creationist heads to explode with that one!

[TomMSTie]

...And?

[Swidhelm]

Good point. :P

[Flatwormsoda]

ha this is perfect!

especially since i just watched the Discovering Ardi special on discovery channel

[TomMSTie]

Our neighbor just had a little girl 3 WEEKS passed the due date!

[UraniumMan]

Why? He was providing humor to the world! LOL

[UraniumMan]

Woh! That's it. I am going to church next Sunday! ;o)

[FerreThoughts]

I was supposed to have been born on May 24, but my birthday is June 10. Hopefully you won't have to wait that long!

Good luck with the little one!

[ApocalypticInferno]

That song... is way too damn catchy. I can't help singing along, while mentally disagreeing with every word coming out of my mouth. lol

[LordSlag]

Women........late for everything.

"The miracle of recording." What a fucking moron. Glutting themselves like hogs at the trough of benefits that science provides while denigrating the amazing truths provided to the deepest questions that humanity has ever asked. To say nothing of leading us in the new directions required to be yet bolder, and ask the greatest questions that can be asked.

Smart people being ridiculed by the stupid children of stupid people indeed, sir.

[nsewx]

anyone who says they aren't related to chimps are kidding themselves..we share 96% of our genes with chimps..basically we are monkey pigs with thumbs and nukes.

[klfly]

Recording is a miracle. It's not science at work, but rather a miracle.

How did this guy grow up in the US and yet he seems like some remote bushman who has never experienced any form of technology. If I showed him a cell phone he'd have worshiped me or more likely burned me at the stake.

[EvoBiologist]

Ahh... I was wondering about your little one. Mine was born two weeks ago tomorrow - the day after his due date.

[joegocal]

why, kieth, why... you made me crying face.

[Spoonfoon]

I actually liked the melody.

It reminded me of Primary School.

That's not necessarily a good thing.

[Xinadium]

Good luck with your new baby daughter, I hope she's healthy and the whole family is happy. :D

Also that song... "I don't know much about his ancestors." Precisely. Go read a book.

[radsjeff]

Miracle of recording?

[debbieomi]

I guess you learn something new everyday. This is sang by Robin and Crystal Bernard, both forgettable actresses. Their father is a Southern Baptist evangelist. Oh, and she supported George Dubya. Big surprise!

[DeletedDelusion]

Should I laugh or cry about that song? I'm confused...

[rageoftyrael]

that song is awesome! i find it funny though how they mention that it's a disgrace to the monkey, i mean, really? the monkey is disgraced here? you all gotta admit, that song is hilarious, even if it is basically retarded in message!

[ApocalypticInferno]

I'm gonna side with the kids on this one. How many monkeys do you know that are killing other monkeys because of who has the best imaginary friend? To monkeys, human beings have to be like a drunk redneck cousin or something.

[invaderj]

That one-line ending made the video.

[christinepeace]

what for the dreaded "can I have the keys to the car dad?"

Cheers Christine

[CrowColdblade]

If her ansesters dident swing from a tree then how did Eve pick the apples?

[NoDeity]

Egad. It was all I could do to listen all the way through without ripping my ears off.

[WARDOG1138]

I completely agree!

[kadsl123]

"It seems much more believable, and surely surely it's true"...?

Really? "Believable" is hardly the word I would use when describing anything in the bible.

[SANTARII]

Ooooh baby, just gotta get out, just gotta get right out o' here!

[SANTARII]

tis perfectly safe

[TimiS0]

ahhh Keith you got me with that song

ill go pro choice

[ProudAtheist90]

keith im sorry for this...but that song just made me realize evolution is crazy and makes no sense..im now christian..PRAISE GOD!!!! nah im just fucking with u:) that song pisses me off

[sevlevboss]

Wow...that song is so offensive. Of course, anything from Jerry Falwell tended to be offensive.

KLJ - hope baby comes soon (today would be nice eh?) and is healthy and happy. Short labour would be great as well.

We want to see baby on atheist church!

[debbieomi]

Perhaps when it's time to baptize her.

;-)

[Sarge084]

When will the creationists get it into their thick heads; Humans didn't come from monkeys, we share a common ancestry, which entirely different.

Facepalm!

[raidershockey14]

that songs right, because its much more reasonable to think that an invisible man up in the sky made man from nothing.......fuck evidence, god did it with his magic! :D

[finalsight]

You fool he made us out of dust and a rib. lol Much more believable than proven scientific fact.

[ofpfury]

That makes me want to throw my shit at creationists. However, who can deny the "miracle" of recording? We all heard it...

[RodHullIOnceWasHim]

They hate monkeys don't they? They just hate them... How is that possible??

[yitih]

....sheldon copper? o_0

[RodHullIOnceWasHim]

Do you mean "Sheldon Cooper"? Otherwise and even so I don't get your comment...?

Did he say the same thing maybe...? If so, I like the cut of his jib :)

[RodHullIOnceWasHim]

Ah, just found a clip, you did mean Sheldon Cooper...

He's right that guy!! ;-)

[joegocal]

EVOLUTION IS NOT AN OPINION MOM.. ITS A FACT.

Best, Big Bang Theory quote, ever.

[Bourneswimmer]

Wow, that song was fantastic.

[2fat2exercise]

That was some efunny shit.

[zet168]

It's kind of sad that we live in a culture where a Free Thought Day is even necessary.

[toweringQ2FL400]

zet168

It's kind of sad that we live in a culture where a Free Thought Day is even necessary.

Worse still, to have a mayor who wouldn't sign it. We're surrounded: one side, the mystics of spirit seek to destroy the mind, on the other the mystics of muscle seek to enslave the body. They act like antagonists, but their goals are the same.

[dtm52]

Teachers should be in a Zoo? Maybe people who brainwash their kids with fairy tales and misinformation should have to do community service.

[darkersideofsanity]

Sorry Kieth, but that song was pretty damn convincing. PRAISE THE LORD!

[samsroomie]

I'm going to go climb a tree. Take that, creationists!

[mtanti87]

my god, that song is fractally wrong. And I'm not talking about the main message, I'm talking about every aspect of it. Basically if it wasn't sung by children no one would enjoy it.

[samsroomie]

well, it got one thing right, "I don't know much..."

[TheYolk]

its coming out day too :)

[anwyll]

lol "the miracle of recording"

[MasterMorgrath]

It's free thought day? It's my birthday too. :)

[LilithMaura]

First babies never show up on time. This will be the last time we see you for a while, though. Happy parenting!