Added: 3 years ago
From: gedio01
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  • Dick Cheney's friends look like Quails.

  • And 500 Iranians will throw it at us. That line was perfect, it shows the insanity of the thought that if Iran gets a nuke, the whole world will go nuts.

  • What the hell? That last joke, the punchline is chopped right off. Seriously? Lewis Black would kick your ass for that..

  • I bet he'll hunt the red coats, not like the schmucks in office now who bow down to foreign governments like little children in front of a catholic priest.

  • Lewis Black for President and Ron Paul for Vice President

  • @bxlxix69 Racist... I'd rather have Barack Obama as president, Ron Paul as Vice-president and Lewis Black as Obama's personal bowl washer.

  • dude what the fuck? you cut off the punchline to the last joke

  • Nice job putting your name on a collection of poor quality videos of Lewis Black's work.

  • Hellz Yeah

    

  • *Iran... Iran... Iran... IRAK!*

  • Go to :22 to skip the bullshit.

  • "....500 Iranians will throw it at us" Brilliant.

  • You well know the americans are SCARED of Iran.

  • YAY the Who!

    

  • Hunting is only a sport if the prey has a gun

  • @tawmkat Agreed,otherwise just say "im going to kill small animals",doesnt sound as manly that way,sadly more like a sociopath.

  • Build a BIG FUCKIN THING

    THIS SHIT IS FUNNY!!

  • 1:43 DID ANYONE NOTICE THE HYDRAULIC NOISE WTF WAS THAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

  • @shakybill2 Thought it was someone coughing. Could be wrong, though.

  • Thumbs up for the guy in the audiance at 1:42.

  • @strongman17 can you explain this joke for me ? i dont really understand english that well

  • @georgesco94 if you listen to the punchline that follows the "it's not the film" comment it sort of explains it. He means that when they send video out and it's in black and white, instead of colour film like everything is today, they're not using black and white film, they're using colour film. They're just so evil that colours don't exist there. Because colours give thing life and make things look pretty and make people happy. Because they're evil in North Korea they don't have colours.

  • @arstxz319 10x!

  • @georgesco94 haha np, glad i could help shed light onto the comedic genius that is.

  • I've never actually seen black and white footage of North Korea

    I have seen black and white footage of America and Germany, though

  • "They turned a petting zoo... into Auschwitz" lol

  • @DragonwingofLove The Who "Baba O'Reily" (remixed) and is used for the opening on CSI:NY.

  • "it even says so on the iraqi page on myspace" lol who uses myspace anymore? goes to show how internet influences social trends xD

  • Oh my god the Google Captions are even funnier than the stand-up itself, and that's saying something because I love Lewis Black lol

  • Why did you put the hunting bit after the Iraq war bit, when the hunting bit leads directly into the Iraq bit (and the Iraq bit contains a callback joke form the hunting bit)

  • 46 people are from North Korea.

  • "Ooh look! We got him in the corner!"

    HAHAHAHA.

  • a nuclear fuck holocaust hahahahaha

  • You don't stand in a circle....

  • funny #LOL

  • 40 People go hunting for quail.

  • "North Korea is the country, that the monkeys from The Wizard of Oz came from..." LOL. Before you get mad you have to understand the comparison...

  • @crowndwner Who would get mad?'' Kim Jong Ill is probably the only one there with internet acces =D

  • Without out a doubt the smartest comedian alive today. And I believe the funiest.

  • That high pitched laugh in the audience is epic :)

  • 8:06 ROFL GUY

  • I still hide under my desk when I'm scared.

  • Now the joke is Sarah Palin.

  • should have put the quale hunting jokes before the Iraq jokes ... in this order the call back in the Iraq joke doesn't make sence

  • 36 people missed the 'like' button, so sad :(

  • In the North Korea-bit, where "...it's not the film."; I love the guy that gets it right before everyone else. Lead-off laughs for the win. \m/

  • @wobdarden Thanks a lot, now all I can hear is that dude laughing!!!

  • @Spydah701 IT'S SO FUNNY, THOUGH! I'd be that guy.

  • "North Korea is the country that the flying monkeys in the Wizard Of Oz came from." hahahahah

  • The hunting bit really should follow the Iran bit

  • Man he could be wrong about the NK XD and im kinda fliping out cus of this but its true

  • you put the Dick Cheney bit after the Iran Iraq bit, you fucking idiot, the punchline doesn't make any sense then

  • his voice sounds like that actor from Beverley hills cop part two - i think it was some sort of an agent/ pen pusher in an office scene

  • the order of the clips completely ruins it.

  • you don't fuck with that kind of evil. LOL

  • LEWIS BLACK FOR PRESIDENT!!!

  • @sparky577 No, World Leader

  • you messed it up! the hunting is before the iran/iraq part so the shooting part of "iran, iran, iran, IRAQ!" part makes sense.

  • @BTrain0530 Thanks! I Didn't get the Iran part lol

  • rabbits with MS! HAHAHA

  • One very, very funny man.

  • OP needs to kill hims self for such an awful video.

  • Why can I not down load the you tube videos, I was able to down load them before using Real player? I really need them when I travel. It keeps me from going insane.

    Please some one help me set this up so that I can down load them to my hard drive.

  • @thinfilms1 use youtube hd transfer then convert with any video converter

  • Lewis is funny, but he doesn't know diddly about quail hunting. Jewish city guys don't do that, in general, as he says.

  • I love it when people take moments out of stories, movies, and stand-up routines and take out all the bits that aren't the punchline so it's a mish-mash of "my favorite quotes." Uncontextualization makes things funny!

  • Wow, this is so true.

  • I want to go to "The Big Fucking Thing Hotel and Casino".

  • @flexicon1996 thay are bot jokes you idiot 

  • @flexicon1996 then for the rest of us. it wouldnt be funny haha. its not really about the punchline. its how they deliver the joke. and lewis black delivers it like no one else!!!!!

  • @flexicon1996 why the fuck would u need a real punchline? oh probably to tell when to laugh right? cause u don't have a fucken clue what Lewis black is talkin about, just like u don't know what your fucking your talking about.

  • @beyondtheglory99 because the definition of comedy is setting up anticipation for something funny and never delivering, right?

  • @flexicon1996 Comedy: A dramatic work that is light and often humorous or satirical in tone and that usually contains a happy resolution of the thematic conflict.

    If you ever saw a live performance of his, you'd see the "deliverance" of his work. But this youtube vid is just a clip show.

  • and 500 iranians will throw it it at us

    HILARIOUS

  • ..."Going quail hunting is like saying im going fishing and going to a gold fish bowl and going GOT IT!" hahahaha LMFAO PRICELESS!

  • Every two weeks when I was nine, my elementary school would have an air raid drill...I guess to remind me that I could die at any minute. LOL.

  • This would be great if the end of jokes weren't cut off. You wanna do a compilation, then at least finish off the jokes...

  • he almost called north Koreans bitches

  • Why are quotes from the video always in the Highest Rated Comments section?

  • His show sucked ass but his standups are hilarious

  • u suck man show the whole thing

  • I remember those drills. Duck and cover and you'll survive under your desk. LOLOLOL.

  • North Korea's the country where the monkeys from the Wizard of Oz came from.

  • it even said so on the iraqi page on myspace lol

  • What happens in D.C., stays on You Tube! It's true! This ass-whole was in the hippodrome theater. I got live coverage via You Tube!!!! He's so F***ing funny!!!

  • Lewis Black for President!!!

  • Editing genius is dumb.

  • LOL I'm with you guys! As long as the Big Fuckin' Thing isn't subject to a Nuclear Fuck Holocaust (we may need some school desks just in case)

  • I love all Lewis Blacks performance, he is funny than hell. keep them coming.

  • 5 seconds more on the end part would have been better. For those who can't guess or have not seen this. "I got it I got it I got it, (he turns) bam"

  • I really wish this would have been a ten minute segment of one show.

    Not just a jerk off session of different routines mixed with some microsoft paint and movie maker.

  • isnt it the other way around? becuz wen u do the color thing, wen u move the red blue and green all the way up, it makes white; wen u turn it all the way down, it creates black

    thats just wat i thought, not passin any judgment

  • Haha the Iraqi page on Myspace..

    Lewis is sooo darn funny!

  • If only we let Saddam and the Iranian wackjob fight each other to death. THEN we should of came.

  • @5308675309 Actually the US tried that once, look up the Iran-Iraq war, they basically butted heads for eight years, the Reagan administration backed Saddam btw. But yeah, hundreds of thousands of lives later they quit it, knowing that neither could wipe out of other. Three years later: the Gulf war.

  • black and white are colours

  • no they are not... learn before u speak...

  • @bb4si how are they not colours?

  • @mrfclarke they are the base of every colours, and can make any in that case, some people say white is a coloyr, but black for sure is not...

  • @bb4si white is the absence of all color; black is the incorporation of all colors.

    Art classes.

  • @theScytheofGod Sue your Art class teacher, it's the other way around ^^ white incorporates all colors, which you can 'create' by shining light through a prisma for instance, complementary colors = all colors, which combined produce the color white....physics classes from school back then ;)

  • @theScytheofGod Not true, it's the exact reverse. White is all the colours, black is the absence of light. I saw absence of light because if you have light, there's colour, even if it seems black, it can at most be darkblue or something, not black. Anything black appears as a hole in existence.

  • @jursle This is a false statement. Most computer software can generate the color black...nice try tho.

  • @spydermanspyder Nope, it's still the same there. It might say it's black, but only way computer software could make something black is if it could make something not reflect light at all.

    Going into a room and shutting the door so tight that no light can enter at all should make everything black, but then again, your body emits infrared light, which we can't see, but still is light. So....the only black thing is something that sucks in light and never lets it go. A black hole.

  • @jursle In regards to your debate with spydermanspyder, you are both right and wrong. There are two ways to percieve. In light, white is the presence of all colors of the spectrum, and black is the absence of any photons, or no colors. In art, or painting, or talking about physical color... white is the absence of all color, and black is the presence of them all mixed together. They do however work in accordance with each other.

  • @Daelmyth True, but that isn't actually colour. We might say that objects or paint have colour, but really only light has colour, all an object can do is reflect it or absord it.

    Apart from that tiny detail, you're completely right ^_^

  • @jursle oh god why the fuck are you arguing about stupid shit. goddamnit i can just picture you two at a party with friends and they are talking about his jokes and having a great time and you two fuckers get into a fucking debate about light and color. holy shit. imagine how stupid you guys look in real life. got it? now shut the fuck up.

  • @spydermanspyder In regards to your debate with jursle, you are both right and wrong. There are two ways to percieve. In light, white is the presence of all colors of the spectrum, and black is the absence of any photons, or no colors. In art, or painting, or talking about physical color... white is the absence of all color, and black is the presence of them all mixed together. They do however work in accordance with each other.

  • "And what you do, is build a big fucking thing. I don't care what it is, as long as it's big, and it's a fucking thing!"

    He is a genius.

  • Lewis; don't forget about all the wetlands that will have to be paved over for the "Big Fucking Thing" PARKING LOT.

  • Comment removed

  • wildboy as much as I love the monkey post - which I now have saved and is making it's way around my group of friends on facebook lol - Saddam had been evading assassination attempts for many many years. The fact that he had CIA training and a massive amount of body doubles helped a lot.

  • @Azmodawn didn't evade the last one!

  • The Iraqi Page on MySpace

    LMAO

  • Lol: I don't care what it is, as long as it's big, and it's a fucking thing!

  • @hobbes71002 yea

  • a big fucking thing restourant the big fucking thing hotell and casino a big fucking thing SPA

  • @hobbes71002 That's what she said!!!

  • ...its not the film....

    so much lolz

  • why would north korea (etreme left wing atheist dictatorship) be in a "axis of evil" with iran and iraq (extreme right wing religious dictatorship)?

    fascism is anti-communism... thats how it started (germans wanted strong conservative government to defend religion from russia)... middle eastern countries helped hitler fight communism because they are also fascist

    bush was a retard to make such a statement

  • @wildboy789789

    Iraq was not a religious dictatorship. It was the most secular nation in the middle east. Saddam had more or less booted out all religious extremists from any and all positions of power.

  • the most secular nation in the middle east... but the middle east is the least secular place to live

    they hang people for being gay... even africa doesnt do that lol... america is intolerant... i live in missouri and im gay and its illegal, but at least im not killed or imprisoned (its kinda a joke law) (a cop would laugh at it here in st.louis)

    also how can you have a secular dictatorship.. secular means tolerant of opposing views.. a dictators job is to not give a shit about the minority

  • 1: Saddam Hussein decriminalized homosexuality.

    2: "Secular" means that the state and church is separate, nothing more. A secular dictatorship is not a contradiction in terms anywhere and indeed a reality in many places.

    3: There is only ONE nation in Africa that recognizes same sex marriages. Meanwhile there are SEVERAL that executes people for it.

  • we are all monkeys... the brown monkeys quit giving the powerful white monkeys fuel and they sent their anti-monkey missles over there and take it back like monkeys do

    meanwhile black monkeys are killing eachother with sticks (in africa) and guns (anywhere else)... the yellow monkeys are heading to mars and building robots... and the red monkeys are opening more casinos

    any of those monkeys that belive in different invisible monkey gods fight eachother and 1 dies (or 1,000,000)

  • Okay so what are you trying to say? That when any actual arguments you can make fail you revert to whiny knee-jerk cynicism?

  • no im just saying who cares about saddam?

    im not for the war but killing ANY dictator is a good thing

    and killing any dilusional (or religious) person is also a good thing in my eyes

    i didnt come right out and say that because alot of idiots belive they are fighting for god and the media treats that like its ok... its absolutely rediculous

    i dont care if he was secular by middle eastern standards... he was still a dictator and probably 10x more religious than bush

  • I don't give a shit about him either, I came in to correct you on whether or not Iraq was extreme-religious, which it wasn't. Saddam used "Allah" as a rhetorical tool, nothing more, wanting instead to have himself as the nation's god. Indeed, indeed, religious freedom was quite wide-spread under him, as long as they didn't oppose the state of course but that's another matter. Saddam never was a religious fanatic, the opposite, end of discussion.

  • who are you... the fucking discussion ender?

    bush was an idiot... so just think of the magnitude of idiotness contained in saddam... bush beat saddam at the game of war lol... saddams strategy of hiding in a hole failed him

    1 monkey is dumber, 1 monkey dies

    and this monkey typeing this comment doesnt care

  • @wildboy789789

    "Dumber" huh? Yes obviously, because having been embargoed by most of the world, draining your nation's economy and then facing down the single most advanced and powerful army in the world has nothing to do with it.

    Also: if you didn't care you wouldn't have responded.

  • @yannos1000 fight the Chinese or the Japanese again or even the russians and see who wins

  • "They turned a petting zoo into Aushwitz" LOL

  • North korea is the country that the monkey from the wizard of oz came from! LOLLL!!!!

  • the mafia will kill their best friend. our government is the mafia.

  • Dick was hunting for dick

  • Dick was hunting for judges

  • My roommate says I'm laughing too loud. Now I feel bad, I'm usually soo considerate...

  • you must be the shit because you have a theme song binki-boy

  • Oh, shut up about the hunting debate. This is a stand-up comedy video. If you dislike what he's talking about, then go watch a different stand-up comic. If you really want to debate this stuff, (1) learn how to debate (I assure you it's not the same thing as calling the other side idiots and contradicting them at every turn) and (2) find a better atmosphere in which to do it. Dear freaking god.

  • Spoken like a true person with a brain.

    Thank you. : )

  • wow that is the worst intro i have ever seen. lame channel man

  • Oh cry me a river! don't give us this "period!" shit. No-one cares about what stipulations you put on how an animal should be hunted, next thing you know there will be "plant rights" activists and they'll start trying to stipulate how we can harvest our wheat.... I mean my hell could you be any more of an idiot?

  • i'd like to get a licence to hunt you.

  • "I mean my hell could you be any more of an idiot?"

    Yes. He could be you. That would do the job about a billion times over.

  • i think you should only be able to hunt animals which can kill you (lion, tigers and bears on my) and you should be only be able to use a bow and arrow and a hunting knife. if you cant kill the animal with those weapons then you shouldnt be able to kill it. period!

  • @slimithy12 no.

  • why not?

  • Cause this world is survival of the fittest. Do bears only hunt food that can kill them? I didn't think so. Grizzlies do eat fish, you know. While I understand that's not all they eat, it's retarded to think we (as we are animals too) should only hunt things which can kill us.

  • im not sure if you have noticed but we are a little more intelligent then a bear. also if we eat everything we hunted then i wouldnt mind as much but we hunt for fun!.to entertain ourselves not to survive. so i thnk that to make it even more entertaining, we should even out the odds a little. then its not so bad if you put that animal up on the wall. it really would be somthing to be proud of. most hunters are cowerds who use 21 centery tec to hunt an animal with 100,000,000, bc defences. bull!

  • Yes, but you never said anything about the hunting being for sport or for food. Not everyone hunts just for fun. I do agree that it's more entertaining to hunt without using a gun. But I'm not trying to make an enemy here, I just don't agree that we should only hunt things which can kill us. Though I also agree with you that if it's going to be hunting for sport, then the animal should have the ability to kill you. Just to even up the odds.

  • Comment removed

  • @slimithy12

    Or you can be smart and hunt for your food at the store where you only need to be armed with a wallet and leave the hunting to the people with enough firearms to shut you up. Period.

    There, I said period. You're not allowed to respond because I said it.

  • @Enigmers hardly any food at the shopping center is hunted, its farmed jackass! plus i said i have no problem with huning animals if it for food. its hunting for sport that i think is wrong. period..lol.

  • @slimithy12

    agreed. i hate the fact of hunting for the sport. just a waste. i wonder if thats what Dick was doing

  • @ComfortablyNumbAgain yeah he was but he got bored and decided to hunt his friend instead...lol.

  • @slimithy12

    haha

  • Man: the Ultimate Prey

  • @Enigmers

    You've just violated your own law by responding after he said period.

  • "Every two weeks they'd have an air raid drill, I guess to remind me THAT I COULD DIE AT ANY MINUTE!" Maybe that's why baby boomers are so screwed up.

  • what song is in the begging

  • With films, to show me how to protect my self.... from a nuclear-fuck-holocaust

  • "North Korea is the country that the monkeys in the Wizard of Oz came from."

    ROFL

  • @TheDemonEve no. it was not a country then. that is not funny. gtfo

  • This guy is so ace.

  • I love how one tenth of the audience laughed when he said "it's not the film." Then everyone laughed when he explained they have no color. How did all those people not get the joke?

  • look at most of the people these days......our school system is not what it needs to be and most people have no common sense or and any idea on world events

  • You don't have to tell me about the schools today. I made the mistake of majoring in education. Right now I'm just a substitute teacher, and kids today just aren't at the same level as when I was in school, and I only graduated high school 6 years ago. It's a shame.

  • "They turned a petting zoo into Auschwitz "

    "The next day they were going to hunt rabbits with multiple sclerosis"

  • 2:32  Hahaha

  • My elementary school would conduct air raid drills every two weeks......

    to remind me that I COULD DIE AT ANY MOMENT!

    Lewis black has THE BEST timing and delivery of any comic I've ever heard. Absolutely hysterical. Thanks for the upload!

  • Comment removed

  • I know, his execution is absolutely perfect.

  • haha nucler fuck holocaust