Single, jobless, and parenting a son with Aspergers

[Dokurochan85]

Hey, don't say you are worried he'll stay home all his life and never have a girlfriend. He's sitting right there. O_o Be careful of that. I hope things are going well for you guys now. I see this was posted in 2008.

-Another Aspie

[AtreidesHeir]

Kids are normally two or three before they start talking? I guess I didn't know that...I started talking at 6 months...my poor parents!

[EconomicTerror]

Where the hell is the father?

[Tarquinbeaniebaby]

I wanna claim loads of disability once I get diagnosed!! Beats going to work cos I'll get paid for being weird!!

[TMBLyrics]

why exactly does she not worry about his future career and only him having a girlfriend/family? wouldn't a job be the main focus in order to SUPPORT his family?

[GreenGirl444]

wait, what does she have?

[faith9105]

It sounds like your doing a great job and your doing the best you can. I just don't think you should be talking about your fears, worries in front of him because he can hear you. I am also a single mom of a ASD son which he just turned 5 last week and was dx 3 months before he turned 3. It was been rocky but I am so blessed to be his mom and I would not change it for the world. God Bless!

[BigD4348]

You might want to check out my videos about my experiences being a person with Aspergers myself. Go to BigD4348 and you'll learn quite a bit about my condition and how I cope with anger and how I am overly sensitive to loud noises, especially bells. Aspies have special talents and those talents can actually be put to productive use. For instance, I am a wonderful writer and I have used this talent to write for my church's newspaper and write articles. Take care now.

[Locke1217]

lets be honest. you all want him to die because of his behavior. u don't really love him because he is alive. and no girl would love a diseased man like this. isn't the world so great!? i wish more autistic people would go on killing sprees.

[mamatude33]

@therealjimguy, I agree with you too, and my son has mild aspergers. Plus she talks about it likes its funny as if to say..."my kid's a weirdo, can you believe I'm goin thru this? Right Max? Remember?- ha ha ha"

[IndigoCat17]

well if he was misdignosed many times he probally is a crystal child he seems so much like a crystal child your kid is special and he is here for a reason don't give him drugs he won't be doing what he is here for if u give him drugs!!!

[IndigoCat17]

OMG just because he is shy and didn't talk early doesn't make him have a mental disorder it just makes him a shy kid!!

[derekox]

What if you had autism/aspergers but you didn't know until you were 40 or something???

[wibarm]

Why have a kid when Aspergers runs in your family?

[Locke1217]

@wibarm autism will make you kill

[earth2k8]

Elaine - do you monitor these comments? I would like to know what you are doing now that Trusella is shut down?

[therealjimguy]

This woman seems like a horrible mother. She talks about maxwell like he is not in the room. She is going to raise a sociopath. He has feelings and everything the same as a normal person. What a horrible example she is setting!

[MONIQUEIJ]

@therealjimguy  i agree with you

[AnElephantThatPaints]

yeah, i agree that it isn't right to talk about kids right in front of them. I like her positive attitude though. i honestly thought this was going to be a sob story when I saw the title, but it is a lot more rational.

[jm2trash]

I think she's doing the best she can, but I don't think she realizes that he's HEARING her say she's scared he'll never have a girlfriend. When he never responds, I think it's easy to forget he's listening.

[pimpdog93]

@therealjimguy well no she is not raising a sociopath maybe you dont understand aspergers it makes you antisocial even in some cases the kid will have a hard time understand that people have feelings cause we only think in logical ways so feelings seem illogical and she does acknowledge him in the room if you pay attention he like i was for a while is completely comfortable with here speaking on his behalf because he is uncomfortable being there like most people with asd would be

[mervyish]

My 18 year old Aspie had a terrible time through school but is commuting to Uni now. I have struggled as a single parent dad with him but aren't they special kids! People say it must be hard but I answer no it must be a lot harder for parents with "normal" 18 year olds. He is not in the park smoking dope or drinking, he conscientiously observes the law, doesn't swear, I know exactly where he is and what he is doing. His experiences have given him inner strength and these kids are our future xx

[AspieAnswers]

He'll be fine when he's 30. He needs to focus on his abilities and his skills that he likes. I bet he'll be a great programmer and maybe an introverted "nerdy" girlfriend. No worries. Keep supporting him and agreeing and smiling!!

[modernmariorc]

governments are not into supporting families and mothers and kids with housing, insurance, day care, baby sitting, health insurance.

[modernmariorc]

pro-lifers would call you a welfare queen. like parenting isn't work.

[gorramdoll]

aww he's adorable

[vicky31mom]

Great story. My son was originally diagnosed with ADHD at almost 5 and then when he was 7 they finally came up with Asperger's and then WOW something that makes sense! Im not working right now either and I practically single cause my hubby does nothing to help. Im back at school now to become a special ed teacher! I have a video about my son on my page!

[05lianne]

your an amazing mum! i have asperger syndrome i was diognosed when i was 10 and now am 22 , i know its probably so hard hang on in there i know how much my mum helped me shes my hero but its hard for her and has been a uphill struggle hes blessed to have you as a mum just as i'm blessed for mine thanks lianne ;)

[nuvalord222]

And how is having a kid with Asberger Syndrome BAD?!?

[Locke1217]

@nuvalord222 because eugenics is loved by people without diseases or disorders. people want to kill people for being lesser than themselves.

[Vgirlification]

@nuvalord222 we have to watch our kids suffer terribly from being unable to make friends, being bullied or having the sh*t beat out of them in public schools etc..... that's the ONLY bad part. other than that, my son is the most wonderful thing that ever happened to me, and my oldest daughter who thinks she has it as well, as she had no friends for the first 16 yrs of her life.... he worshiped the ground she walked on, healed her heart it did.....

[NamekianPikkoro7]

I think she has asperger's to.

[11krage]

Looks like your doing a great job, sure he'll be different but really how boring would society be if we were all the same. 21 here with aspergers, watching your video made me think of all the things my mum did for me raising me, he'll turn out fine.

[keonmeka]

I feel you Im in the same boat as you are. but there seem to be a light at the end of the tunnel i hope. my son was DS @ 5and I could work with the stress from his school and other life problems at the time. Though I had some day when it seem like I could go through life crying about it. I felt so bad for him. I had the same fears as you I kinda still do. But what I see helped was instead of hiding at home I started doing what other people did and taught him along the way how he suppose to act

[beastinblack]

reminds me of my nephew...and me! it really does take that long in many countries.

[xanderthegreatest]

Thank you, Elaine and Max, for sharing.

As stressful and confusing single-handedly raising a Asperger's child can be, I personally would not trade it for the world.

May you and your family be blessed with peace and love.

hugs

[ischlopischlo]

I wish the actual autistic person was in focus more often with videos like this, I wonder how your son would talk about his diagnose himself, his perspective might be very different from your own.

But nice video anyway I suppose.

[EmbyrDragon]

I just so happen to be the 14-year-old daughter, and being almost the opposite of my brother, am quite assured that I do NOT have Aspergers. Even if it isn't OCD that I have, I'm not an Aspie... I just might get lumped into that category. *Sigh of annoyance*

[bdad89]

What a compelling story - speaks to the need for changed state insurance for special needs and to address the 47 million uninsured in the US.

[GingerBottom167]

An extremely powerful video!

[peibilly]

Thanks so much for sharing your video. I can't imagine how tough it is to be a single parent with two children on the autism spectrum.

Maxfield seems like a happy kid. You're a great mom and doing a wonderful job.