"I'm a ciggaret smoking man from the government and I find this video very offensive. It makes it sound as if I am not doing my job, and that I am incompetent."
To those of you who may be OFFENDED by this video, all they are doing is "spoofing" on what our government is doing already and using it on psych patients and what they are saying IS that it is an invasion b/c this is an excuse to MAKE U WANT IT or your caregiver and next it's just everyone. So don't be offended guys the point is that they are using that as the smokescreen(government).Like w/dogs w/the microchip-I knew then it was a matter of time.
Instead of making fun of people with Schizophria; you should be concentrating on positive feed back an help for those who truly need it. As far as I'm concerned this is not a joke. This video is cruel.
well...technically, if the govt DID do this, it would no longer be delusions on the part of the schizophrenics, so...essentially, it could constitute a CURE!!!
Hey guys. I'm battling from schizophrenia. I'm not asking for money or views or anything, but just for support and for people to hear me out. My psychiatrist said to let people know about your problem, but everyone thinks I'm weird and my family cannot understand or take me seriously. I made a blog about my problems, and I hope we can talk on there. My blog is battlingschizophrenia.blogspot.com . Fellow schizophrenics, you should also come. We can fight the battle together.
technically, major advances in making schizophrenics aware of programs like this could begin to open their minds to all sorts of unnormal entertainment... I mean, why so serious? millions of schizophrenics could be sharing nonsensical, irreverant conversation about their condition on a daily basis, as a counterpart to the dogmatic whining they hear from their doctors every month, because let's face it, once a doctor pisses you off with "you're going to die that way" you need joy from something
Very funny .I thought this was real for a moment.Put cameras in your supermarket .Oddly the satire is more cutting than one may think ,Gottlieb being a "helper" that springs to mind or the hilarious Dr Cameron and his Canadian safari.
If schizophrenics require observation and care from others that is what hospitals are for. Using technology in this way against an individual that suffers delusions/hallucinations would most definitely interfere with becoming stable.
If technology can be used to do this kind of bullshit, then F--K technology especially video technology! !
You know, as a schizophrenic, I don't want to say this was funny... Of course I feel sad when, I just wish that they would indicate some remorse prior or after this was shown...I would of fully appreciated it if that was the case
HOW RUDE.... I think this is absolutely the most repulsive MOCKERY of this mental disorder I've ever come across. Whoever made this video should be ashamed of themselves.
Okay just let me hack this again as you do not no it all.
Your anti psychotic tablets are not there yet. Maby in 100 years. Yes they help during the phase they were a life saver and snapped me from hell. They have negative side effects while using them for 1 year ( advised ). Hopefully in years time they will be perfect with positive side effects. but they are not good enough yet.
Another thing is that they need a doctor who can explain what up.
Doctor dont just listen and write it down ready for diagnosis.
They need the blessing of realisation.
Your brain analyses your actions thoughts to shape you into the person you are today for better or worse.Eg what you no as sin. If you no you sin so does your mind. Your mind will then shape your life a tad. Thats not to do with a pshychotic episode.
Dangerous video. I know it's funny for us normal people, but this video could actually send a paranoid schizophrenic into a very very severe breakdown. Some "normal" people are fooled by Onion videos.... a schizophrenic, out of touch with reality, could easily take this video entirely seriously and have a dangerous crisis... Everyone browses the internet, especially people who can't work jobs - people with mental illnesses.
what was that the united nations give 3 million to a filthy poor country and pay 30 million for battle plot. Sick evil power freak. If you didnt mess up with iraq you could have been honoured for developing a third world country by the rest f the wrold. its pure hatred of stuipidity of how your intelligence has braiwashed you to another direction of how the world can be
@ilovejamesandmoney I typed that with frozen hands. You could have been hounored by giving but instead you messed up with getting involved with rules and regulations
they should've really made that loop more clear as to what the intentions of everybody around me were. I honestly thought they were out to get me in a threatening way. Good to finally know that's not what they meant to tell me. Thanks, Onion, for clearing that up.
THIS INFO DOCTORS WILL NOT TELL YOU BECAUSE A PATIENT CURED IS A PATIENT LOST! THIS INFO COULD SAVE YOU TEN YEARS OF THEROPY! ASLO WHAT OUT FOR GLUTEN.
cure for schizophrenia IS B3 (NIACIN), ZINC 50MGS , MAGNISIUM CITRATE AND COENZYME Q10! ALSO WATCH WHAT YOUR FOOD ALERGIES ARE... STUDY DONE THAT A PERSON WAS GIVEN CHEESE THAT THEY HAD AN ALERGY TO.. AND EXPERIENCED 8 HOURS OF SCHIZOPHRENIA. ON OTHER THING... REALITY THEROPY... THINK DIFFERENCES!! DIFFERENCES IS THE KEY TO SANITY!
As a recovering schizophrenic, I find this very funny. I think a good measure would also be to make the eye, on the back of the dollar bill, become a transponder and a gps device. We, schizophrenics, already believe it is there to hurt us and spy on us. Why not make it true? That way we could say the eye on the dollar bill is not schizophrenia, nor paranoia. It would be killing two birds with one stone, or at least maiming two birds with one stone. Doctor says killing is bad.
I have the disturbing suspicion that those people I mentioned already have multiple guns.
Gun control is too lax in this country.
9/11 truther? NO GUNS FOR YOU! Think that Obama is a lizard? NO GUNS FOR YOU! Believe Oprah is the Antichrist? NO GUNS FOR YOU! Think the Jews are trying to take over the world? NO GUNS FOR YOU!
AHHHH-HAAA-HAA!!!!!! this is soooo funny! i am laughing so hard i am pretty sure my stomach muscles are going to hurt later. oh man! this is killing me!
Although everyone reacts differently, as a paranoid schizophrenic I find this hilarious. After a life-long struggle there's nothing left to do but laugh, and the onion is perfect for that.
Oh man when I saw the title of this, I thought to myself.... this is really bad really really bad. Some people don't know what "the onion" is and could think is real....specifically schizophrenics.
@TheCrystalRiver Schizophrenics have paranoia delusions. Think about how they would react if the gov recommends following them around and keeping track of them FOR REAL.
I had a brother with this terrible illness and he committed suicide.... I don't find this shit funny... fuck you and you video... all you people are dumb as fuck
@jackthelad101 I'm very sorry about your brother. Of course the illness is not at all funny, it is terrible and should be taken seriously. Just that fact that these people are seriously talking about 'how it would be a good idea' to put camera's everywere to spy on people that are already paranoid to begin with is the most moronic thing ever. It's not the disease that is laughable, it's these people that are so incredible stupid and who do not understand one bit about schitzophrenics
@anynamebutmyrealone thank you so much for your kind words, your are a really thoughtful and kind person. Your right its the stigma against depression and mental illness that makes it worse, medication cant work. Its this kind of attitude that will never make any progress..I don't know if you seen the movie called ''a beautiful mind''?. but it is so true. Its people who think deeper than others,who are truly unique and above these sort of idiot robot bullys..I hope u have really beautiful day :D
It sure is... Don't you agree with them? Cause I think this is a great idea, actually, I've heard that the government is already using these technologies to help the schizophrenics..
Paranoia is unfortunately becoming more mainstream every day; look no further than Texas gov. Rick Perry's establishment-clause-violating "prayer day" speakers. According to them, homosexuality is a reptilian illuminati conspiracy, Oprah is an Antichrist worshipper, Hitler was sent by god to drive the Jews to Israel, Japan's emperor had sex with a goddess, and each of those comes from DIFFERENT SPEAKERS THERE. Did I mention he's running for president?
& STELTH PLANES & HELICOPTERS TO TRACK Schizophrenics ?
use those resources smarter! their are bigger problems like Crystal Meth Dealers crack drealers coke dealers acid dealers heroin dealers! child abusers rapeis terroist!
other people with more DANGEROUSE mental problems!
Prevention will stop Schizophrenics and many other problems </3
@HYSTER77R --- The Onion (this show) is a fake news program that uses sarcasm to make people laugh. It is all a joke. No one really thinks that these are good ideas. Hopefully that explains a lot and helps you to enjoy this and other episodes of The Onion.
coded anagrams? thats ALL a Schizophrenic thinks! that theirs codes and secret messages ! insted of playing their own fucken game how about you tell them the freaking truth?
implanting more fucken VOICES into their fucken head wont help!
they have enuff running thru their!
Maybe if you place them in a better envioroment ! you'll have a chance!
The sad part is, paranoid people are going to think this is a conspiracy too. Like the onion is working for the government and are trying to discredit "them".
Dude! If I saw this seven years ago in the full fledge of my Schitzophrenia, I would have dealt with it better! These guys are great! I love it! We need more jokes like this!
good idea, lets also put microphones in their toilet paper to whisper sweet nothings into their assholes that remind them of pleasant childhood memories.
This is brilliant! absolutely hilarious, coded tattoos and messages on cereal boxes??? Guess this means lucky charms ain't gonna be so lucky anymore. And to whoever wrote about the sinister meaning behind this referring to those who are ''aware'', isn't that, ironically, a symptom of a prime candidate for paranoid schizophrenia?!
The German state systematically is openly using murder to suppress any opposition since at least 1919. Torture with directed energy weapons was already used in 1908, see my homepage, chapter Psychiatrie-->Zur Klinik der Narkolepsie. They also used large amounts of snitchers before ww1. There are several cases of possible murders before ww1, the most obvious being the famous Rudolf Diesel, see chapter murder on my homepage.You may have translated the texts by clicking the flags.
@BirrelSquoy 3.) Retards who don't understand jokes and scream "This video is a joke you retard!" to a person who actually understands that this is a joke and is joking about it.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH O.O please please please kill this video!! o.o omg ahhhh ......... whyyyyyyyyyyyyy?! freak the crap outta me! why did i even watch thisss?? now im even more freakeddd
what about manic people
Penguinz13989 2 days ago
Is this a joke, because it is highly offensive.
motboth7 6 days ago
"I'm a ciggaret smoking man from the government and I find this video very offensive. It makes it sound as if I am not doing my job, and that I am incompetent."
Bablet16 1 week ago in playlist Season 1
They're watching me O.°
fox64057 1 week ago
To those of you who may be OFFENDED by this video, all they are doing is "spoofing" on what our government is doing already and using it on psych patients and what they are saying IS that it is an invasion b/c this is an excuse to MAKE U WANT IT or your caregiver and next it's just everyone. So don't be offended guys the point is that they are using that as the smokescreen(government).Like w/dogs w/the microchip-I knew then it was a matter of time.
keliciousify 2 weeks ago
I have schizophrenia and they aren't going to do that to me. It's an invashion of privacy.
peterdanid1 2 weeks ago
@peterdanid1 This video is three years old, they've already done it to you!
Jurassicparkz08 20 hours ago
"We need more than one voice so they know it's a team effort" LMAO
SuperWarking 1 month ago 4
129 statues don't love The Onion anymore :(
Puglous 1 month ago
Instead of making fun of people with Schizophria; you should be concentrating on positive feed back an help for those who truly need it. As far as I'm concerned this is not a joke. This video is cruel.
TheLoveroses24 1 month ago
The voices in my head told me to let you guys know that this wasn't funny.
desaad37 1 month ago
LOL!!!
Blankname101 1 month ago
i cant believe anyone would actually go on the air saying such things for even to let alone to publish it!
zsammyz 1 month ago
@zsammyz I really hope you're a troll
kylesenior 1 month ago
That seriously is insulting! offending and inhumane!!
is this for real?!
zsammyz 1 month ago
well...technically, if the govt DID do this, it would no longer be delusions on the part of the schizophrenics, so...essentially, it could constitute a CURE!!!
kaurathegreat 1 month ago
"We need to hide cameras everywhere they go; in the streets, in their homes, in the eyes of people in the stores where they shop..."
hafabee 1 month ago
Hey guys. I'm battling from schizophrenia. I'm not asking for money or views or anything, but just for support and for people to hear me out. My psychiatrist said to let people know about your problem, but everyone thinks I'm weird and my family cannot understand or take me seriously. I made a blog about my problems, and I hope we can talk on there. My blog is battlingschizophrenia.blogspot.com . Fellow schizophrenics, you should also come. We can fight the battle together.
jaco0bx 2 months ago
@jaco0bx hi jacob-san. i am also schizophrenic and stable. stay strong ^.^
QuetzalElla 2 months ago
no theyre spying on alcoholics dumbass
bobodd5 2 months ago
technically, major advances in making schizophrenics aware of programs like this could begin to open their minds to all sorts of unnormal entertainment... I mean, why so serious? millions of schizophrenics could be sharing nonsensical, irreverant conversation about their condition on a daily basis, as a counterpart to the dogmatic whining they hear from their doctors every month, because let's face it, once a doctor pisses you off with "you're going to die that way" you need joy from something
MrGodkid 2 months ago
omg... why is this soo fucked up hahahaha showing this to someone with schizophrenia would just be soooo cruel... but so funny at the same time lol
IhateMEXILANA 2 months ago
anyone tempted to show this to a real paranoid schizophrenic and tell them its real news?
I have an evil sense of humour.
daveforfun22 2 months ago
@daveforfun22 yes should be working on getting a funny sense of humor. if u wanna shock someone
dharmaatdawn 2 months ago
"crAyons taste like purple!"
jduplechin 2 months ago
I KNEW I WASN'T CRAZY!
ydimkthis 2 months ago
Very funny .I thought this was real for a moment.Put cameras in your supermarket .Oddly the satire is more cutting than one may think ,Gottlieb being a "helper" that springs to mind or the hilarious Dr Cameron and his Canadian safari.
69likker69 2 months ago
If schizophrenics require observation and care from others that is what hospitals are for. Using technology in this way against an individual that suffers delusions/hallucinations would most definitely interfere with becoming stable.
If technology can be used to do this kind of bullshit, then F--K technology especially video technology! !
PowerAmps1000 2 months ago
You know, as a schizophrenic, I don't want to say this was funny... Of course I feel sad when, I just wish that they would indicate some remorse prior or after this was shown...I would of fully appreciated it if that was the case
ObamaNigga 2 months ago
My family is almost entirely schizo, and they all found this hilarious. So pull those sticks outta your asses and just enjoy the satire.
K4tsuk3 3 months ago
HOW RUDE.... I think this is absolutely the most repulsive MOCKERY of this mental disorder I've ever come across. Whoever made this video should be ashamed of themselves.
theartofthecovenant 3 months ago
i also feel supported by the community in my head
guguigugu 3 months ago
they do need to be watched seriously ,most of them are extremely dangerous to others!!!
tobeyanteus 3 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
The first one is Hall of the Mountain King, I believe and the last one is Smells Like Teen Spirit by Nirvana. Thank you very much for watching.
530BigBen 3 months ago
Fuck Jim Carey is still trying to kill me
llc263 3 months ago
Okay just let me hack this again as you do not no it all.
Your anti psychotic tablets are not there yet. Maby in 100 years. Yes they help during the phase they were a life saver and snapped me from hell. They have negative side effects while using them for 1 year ( advised ). Hopefully in years time they will be perfect with positive side effects. but they are not good enough yet.
ilovejamesandmoney 3 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
well that doesn't really help schizophrenics...
TheYouwontgetit 3 months ago
Another thing is that they need a doctor who can explain what up.
Doctor dont just listen and write it down ready for diagnosis.
They need the blessing of realisation.
Your brain analyses your actions thoughts to shape you into the person you are today for better or worse.Eg what you no as sin. If you no you sin so does your mind. Your mind will then shape your life a tad. Thats not to do with a pshychotic episode.
ilovejamesandmoney 3 months ago
Beware of alpha beta pheta sounds too. Silent sounds you cant here. Trust me its like negative untrasound.
ilovejamesandmoney 3 months ago
Have you talked the side effect. It could have an effect on the elctric in our brain
ilovejamesandmoney 3 months ago
I dont belive in world peace I belive in equalism for ever country. This country has developed enough to star helping
There should be a world law of human needs.
So the basics are that africa needs help we need to get the ships and planes to africa to develop the country in intense time as they need help?
I belive in mind movies, sublimanal messages and brain washing.
The goveremt have been proved as evil. If I could take you to court for you to be proven evil I would win the case.
ilovejamesandmoney 3 months ago
Oh lets go sp on a schotzo that will really help them lol
ilovejamesandmoney 3 months ago
Dangerous video. I know it's funny for us normal people, but this video could actually send a paranoid schizophrenic into a very very severe breakdown. Some "normal" people are fooled by Onion videos.... a schizophrenic, out of touch with reality, could easily take this video entirely seriously and have a dangerous crisis... Everyone browses the internet, especially people who can't work jobs - people with mental illnesses.
jd6735 3 months ago
what was that the united nations give 3 million to a filthy poor country and pay 30 million for battle plot. Sick evil power freak. If you didnt mess up with iraq you could have been honoured for developing a third world country by the rest f the wrold. its pure hatred of stuipidity of how your intelligence has braiwashed you to another direction of how the world can be
ilovejamesandmoney 3 months ago
@ilovejamesandmoney I typed that with frozen hands. You could have been hounored by giving but instead you messed up with getting involved with rules and regulations
ilovejamesandmoney 3 months ago
@ilovejamesandmoney How little you actually know.
anonymousman555 2 months ago
@anonymousman555 Your so ugly
ilovejamesandmoney 2 months ago
@ilovejamesandmoney What does the appearance of my one celled organisms in light have to do with anything.
anonymousman555 2 months ago
@anonymousman555 Dont. Just dont be nasy. You say I no little and you think you no lots. People just no stuff but what is truth? Now goodbye
ilovejamesandmoney 2 months ago
Oommmgggg Jim carey is trying to
Get me.
llc263 4 months ago
Omg omgooomg . Jim Carey is trying to kill me.
llc263 4 months ago
also little speakers inside your ear to tell you which statues still love your or not
cydneyxxxaustralia 4 months ago
they should've really made that loop more clear as to what the intentions of everybody around me were. I honestly thought they were out to get me in a threatening way. Good to finally know that's not what they meant to tell me. Thanks, Onion, for clearing that up.
winfriedSS 4 months ago
THIS INFO DOCTORS WILL NOT TELL YOU BECAUSE A PATIENT CURED IS A PATIENT LOST! THIS INFO COULD SAVE YOU TEN YEARS OF THEROPY! ASLO WHAT OUT FOR GLUTEN.
caelin14 4 months ago
cure for schizophrenia IS B3 (NIACIN), ZINC 50MGS , MAGNISIUM CITRATE AND COENZYME Q10! ALSO WATCH WHAT YOUR FOOD ALERGIES ARE... STUDY DONE THAT A PERSON WAS GIVEN CHEESE THAT THEY HAD AN ALERGY TO.. AND EXPERIENCED 8 HOURS OF SCHIZOPHRENIA. ON OTHER THING... REALITY THEROPY... THINK DIFFERENCES!! DIFFERENCES IS THE KEY TO SANITY!
caelin14 4 months ago
As a recovering schizophrenic, I find this very funny. I think a good measure would also be to make the eye, on the back of the dollar bill, become a transponder and a gps device. We, schizophrenics, already believe it is there to hurt us and spy on us. Why not make it true? That way we could say the eye on the dollar bill is not schizophrenia, nor paranoia. It would be killing two birds with one stone, or at least maiming two birds with one stone. Doctor says killing is bad.
UnfoundWay 4 months ago 30
Omg omg omg
Jim carrey singing 'creep' is scarier than Jim carrey singing 'creep'.
Fuck. Which bus driver hates me... ;)
llc263 4 months ago
Thuy will blow if Chaz doesn't win Dancing With the Stars.
Kathy Lee is cute. She is like big sister
llc263 4 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
No no no no...
i' no Thuy! Placed self in corner with given porn ideas and book on karner bleu butterfly.
no bean curd endorsements just send me back to earth please.
llc263 4 months ago
Omg! I laughed sooo hard. How did I even stumble upon this? Wow, they didn't even giggle! How many takes?
annewilken 4 months ago
122 schizophrenics disliked this video
Ace228182 4 months ago
Look.
No look.
Nevermind.
You missed it.
stolencaraudio 4 months ago
everyone has some kind of condition lets not stop with schizos move ahead to bi polars ADHD and autism
LandisXX 4 months ago
seems like they fear schizos
LandisXX 4 months ago
wow they make this sound so sweet
LandisXX 4 months ago
OMG, I have been suspecting this since long time. ! The housemaid we have is a CIA !
330MillionGods 4 months ago in playlist 330MillionGods's Favorited Videos
@330MillionGods she probably is.
Tessa543 4 months ago
Comment removed
destin325 4 months ago
No.
italianprincess71 4 months ago
@gunskill20
I have the disturbing suspicion that those people I mentioned already have multiple guns.
Gun control is too lax in this country.
9/11 truther? NO GUNS FOR YOU! Think that Obama is a lizard? NO GUNS FOR YOU! Believe Oprah is the Antichrist? NO GUNS FOR YOU! Think the Jews are trying to take over the world? NO GUNS FOR YOU!
It really shouldn't be that hard.
Jjames763 4 months ago
aww my mom is skitso, it would suck if they did that... so i didnt find this one funny
ugasziz 5 months ago
@ugasziz I have a form of schizophrenia and I thought it was hilarious! you obviously missed the joke
Tessa543 4 months ago
@Tessa543 i guess i did
ugasziz 4 months ago
this is so funny ha ha ha
Bubblegum372 5 months ago
"Everyone around you wants to get you....in reference to help." LOL
jennielynn77 5 months ago 42
schizoaffective here... and this is hilarious.
whovianfloovian 5 months ago
What statues don't love them anymore.
ROFL
kcrozby2 5 months ago
x::D::: Well that explains that strange black plane that always seems to be around.
J88Wolf 5 months ago
The Onion is great. Even the title made me laugh.
rebelslayer13 5 months ago
AHHHH-HAAA-HAA!!!!!! this is soooo funny! i am laughing so hard i am pretty sure my stomach muscles are going to hurt later. oh man! this is killing me!
vgb42222 5 months ago
Although everyone reacts differently, as a paranoid schizophrenic I find this hilarious. After a life-long struggle there's nothing left to do but laugh, and the onion is perfect for that.
DorkFortress 5 months ago
did anyone let the schizophrenics know about this program?
viking977 5 months ago
At least they want to help.
drumdust 5 months ago
theonion.com/articles/new-study-shows-people-with-panic-disorders-respon,20892/
eviltube1111 5 months ago
I KNEEWW IIT!!!!!!
glovztoshow 5 months ago
LMAO!!!! perfect!!!!It is genius comedy,
pharisdrp 5 months ago
LOFAO!!! (Laffin' our fuggin' asses off)
elysium735 6 months ago
I give them props
mattrc2 6 months ago
Oh man when I saw the title of this, I thought to myself.... this is really bad really really bad. Some people don't know what "the onion" is and could think is real....specifically schizophrenics.
jksuva 6 months ago
@jksuva that's what makes it so funny....I've had my experiences with schizophrenics...
darthjader08 5 months ago
I would love to show this video in a phs ward
JUSTIN40405 6 months ago
This is rally bad use of humor, honestly
TheCrystalRiver 6 months ago
@TheCrystalRiver
Rally?
MadSpaceCow 5 months ago
I don't get it lol
TheCrystalRiver 6 months ago
@TheCrystalRiver Schizophrenics have paranoia delusions. Think about how they would react if the gov recommends following them around and keeping track of them FOR REAL.
uwlwsrpm 6 months ago
@uwlwsrpm so true lol my exact thought
LandisXX 4 months ago
i wish i knew which statues dont love me anymore
cronon94 6 months ago 2
dont you let a schizophrenic see this..
3kekseund1loch 6 months ago
i suport this cause
Do you?
MRguywithlazereyes 6 months ago
@azul8811 - You read my mind and stole the comment I was going to make! Dammit! There must be a listening device in that hat I bought yesterday.
sfHypernet 6 months ago
I had a brother with this terrible illness and he committed suicide.... I don't find this shit funny... fuck you and you video... all you people are dumb as fuck
jackthelad101 6 months ago
@jackthelad101 I'm very sorry about your brother. Of course the illness is not at all funny, it is terrible and should be taken seriously. Just that fact that these people are seriously talking about 'how it would be a good idea' to put camera's everywere to spy on people that are already paranoid to begin with is the most moronic thing ever. It's not the disease that is laughable, it's these people that are so incredible stupid and who do not understand one bit about schitzophrenics
anynamebutmyrealone 6 months ago
@anynamebutmyrealone thank you so much for your kind words, your are a really thoughtful and kind person. Your right its the stigma against depression and mental illness that makes it worse, medication cant work. Its this kind of attitude that will never make any progress..I don't know if you seen the movie called ''a beautiful mind''?. but it is so true. Its people who think deeper than others,who are truly unique and above these sort of idiot robot bullys..I hope u have really beautiful day :D
jackthelad101 6 months ago
Sounds like they're discussing certain segments of the "Truther" Movement.
azul8811 6 months ago
it's funny because schizophrenics actually believe that this is happening
Mropticalgreen 6 months ago
@Thrawn3000 LOL if it were it wud mean humankind were doomed
pinkypinkstery 6 months ago
Is this real?!?!
Thrawn3000 6 months ago
@Thrawn3000
It sure is... Don't you agree with them? Cause I think this is a great idea, actually, I've heard that the government is already using these technologies to help the schizophrenics..
mvtdeassis 6 months ago
It's like that panel absolutely had no idea what paranoia actually means. You've gotta love the irony.
anongos 6 months ago
@anongos Which is the whole joke...
CoilCode 6 months ago
@CoilCode I know. It was just so funny to me, I felt pushed to mention it.
anongos 6 months ago
Paranoia is unfortunately becoming more mainstream every day; look no further than Texas gov. Rick Perry's establishment-clause-violating "prayer day" speakers. According to them, homosexuality is a reptilian illuminati conspiracy, Oprah is an Antichrist worshipper, Hitler was sent by god to drive the Jews to Israel, Japan's emperor had sex with a goddess, and each of those comes from DIFFERENT SPEAKERS THERE. Did I mention he's running for president?
Jjames763 6 months ago
LMAO...I love how everything that they're suggesting only perpetuates the delusions of Schizophrenics...!
NappyHeadJackie 6 months ago
LOL..."A recorded voice on a loop say, "Everyone around you wants to get you"....In reference to help.." Classic Onion Satire.!!!
NappyHeadJackie 6 months ago
its more funny when people on youtube dont get it
robin22391 6 months ago
& STELTH PLANES & HELICOPTERS TO TRACK Schizophrenics ?
use those resources smarter! their are bigger problems like Crystal Meth Dealers crack drealers coke dealers acid dealers heroin dealers! child abusers rapeis terroist!
other people with more DANGEROUSE mental problems!
Prevention will stop Schizophrenics and many other problems </3
HYSTER77R 6 months ago
@HYSTER77R --- The Onion (this show) is a fake news program that uses sarcasm to make people laugh. It is all a joke. No one really thinks that these are good ideas. Hopefully that explains a lot and helps you to enjoy this and other episodes of The Onion.
danieljosephwilliams 6 months ago
@danieljosephwilliams yeah i know but their baseing the show on real fact aint they?
HYSTER77R 6 months ago
@HYSTER77R --- No, they are just kidding. That's why it's so funny! It would be sad and scary if they were reporting facts...
danieljosephwilliams 6 months ago
@HYSTER77R Stay in school.
7th75thCallaghan 6 months ago
Slip it into their minds subcontiously?
coded anagrams? thats ALL a Schizophrenic thinks! that theirs codes and secret messages ! insted of playing their own fucken game how about you tell them the freaking truth?
implanting more fucken VOICES into their fucken head wont help!
they have enuff running thru their!
Maybe if you place them in a better envioroment ! you'll have a chance!
HYSTER77R 6 months ago
@HYSTER77R
Dude, chill out, this is FAKE. XD But don't worry, I though the Onion was real too at first.. lol XD
AngelFluttershy767 6 months ago
@HYSTER77R
....This IS A JOKE.....YES EXACTLY! they think it already. The Onion is making fun of the fact that People are making their paranoia come true.
This isn't literal....God I can't believe you people actually think this is true...
Lusa5 6 months ago
all the people talking on this Video sounds like Paranoid Schizophrenic's!
Hideing cammeras in the eyes of people? what the fuck? thats some crazy thinking!.
their is already cameras everywere! & people still get away with murder etc. that doesent help!
Doctores placeing chips in their patients -_____-' offcourse hey are going to be OKAY with it after all those fucken drugs you place them on!
implanting more fucken VOICES into their fucken head wont help!
HYSTER77R 6 months ago
this was the first onion video I saw and I thought it was real
TheJasonDR 7 months ago
oh god
oh god
it's all true
it's all true
it's all true
they are watching
they're always watching
i was right
and now It's too late
thisismyfcukingemail 7 months ago 4
@thegirlpuss
People would give paranoid schizophrenics guns!?
Oh. Right. Jared Laughner. Columbine. The Radical Right. The South. Gun rights activists...
Maybe it's time to change the second amendment to say, "After it's been thoroughly established that they're not murderously batshit insane".
Jjames763 7 months ago
@Jjames763 u saying they would give paranoid schizophrenic guns ?
gunskill20 4 months ago
i honestly dont think we are...
DJAPK 7 months ago
everyone around you wants to get them.......in reference to help
samuraigraffix 7 months ago
WTF,they dun wanna be watched 24/7, what say if they're like,what,jacking off?? they still want the fckin government staring at them?
TheDarkBlob 7 months ago
@TheDarkBlob Dude they are seriously sick they wouldn't do that.....
vimarandy 7 months ago
@vimarandy well they are saying 24/7 all time dud...
TheDarkBlob 7 months ago
Comment removed
vimarandy 7 months ago
The schizophrenics are sick they would not J off
vimarandy 7 months ago
@vimarandy r u really sure bout dat?
TheDarkBlob 7 months ago
Such great ideas from truly bright scientific and theoretical minds.
GammaX107 7 months ago
The sad part is, paranoid people are going to think this is a conspiracy too. Like the onion is working for the government and are trying to discredit "them".
Revolution2pointO 7 months ago
which statues dont love them anymore xD
hilarious
TiGraffi 7 months ago
Onion MAKES them schizophrenic.
LossOfEternal 7 months ago
This is dangerous stuff! Just the sort of thing we want schizophrenics with guns to hear!
Keep up the good work!
thegirlpuss 7 months ago
I KNEW IT!!!
SonOfTanit 7 months ago 3
As a person with Schizo, I think this is very funny, in a grim way. A lot of this I think about daily.
Lykobin 7 months ago 31
@Lykobin
Right on man. The Onion doesn't want to make you offended, they just want to get you...
...in reference to laughing.
Puglous 7 months ago
Haha..I don't know weather to like or dislike this video.
Coming from one, it's funny and insulting at the same time :p
Cheifbanidt 7 months ago
this is fucking epic
megatajikistan2 7 months ago
117 people are Alex Jones.
devourerofbabies 7 months ago
This is hilarious! I love these guys. XD
AngelFluttershy767 7 months ago
Dude! If I saw this seven years ago in the full fledge of my Schitzophrenia, I would have dealt with it better! These guys are great! I love it! We need more jokes like this!
DagwoodTheGreen 7 months ago 9
this guys are so fucking brilliant
HOLIMOUNT 7 months ago
hahahahahahhaaa
alpop850 7 months ago
soooo funny
chijkd21 8 months ago
that was rich!
YesEthan 8 months ago
they already get the voice that says there all trying to get them. they already know the airplanes are spying on them ...........sad but true
elwap0 8 months ago
"Everyone around you, wants to get you"
LMFAO!
ImyManz99 8 months ago
LMFAO!! The Onion is absolute GENIUS COMEDY XD
infinitedreams56 8 months ago 68
I thought all the statues loved meT_T
sonic200990 8 months ago 3
This is one of the best Onion vids xD
liamsp544 8 months ago 2
Send this video to every schizophrenic you know.
You´ll be of service to our country.
Hog
hoghash78 8 months ago
good idea, lets also put microphones in their toilet paper to whisper sweet nothings into their assholes that remind them of pleasant childhood memories.
Distortedtabs 8 months ago
LMAO!!!!
deanrps 8 months ago
everything looks so fake on tv im scitzofrenic and u normal ppl are tripping me out!!!!!!!!!
gunskill20 8 months ago
This is brilliant! absolutely hilarious, coded tattoos and messages on cereal boxes??? Guess this means lucky charms ain't gonna be so lucky anymore. And to whoever wrote about the sinister meaning behind this referring to those who are ''aware'', isn't that, ironically, a symptom of a prime candidate for paranoid schizophrenia?!
Sheepdip42 8 months ago 2
I laff, I don't laugh at this, I laff at this.
Koloszrodosthe 8 months ago
ROFLMAO!!!
JNS033 8 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
The German state systematically is openly using murder to suppress any opposition since at least 1919. Torture with directed energy weapons was already used in 1908, see my homepage, chapter Psychiatrie-->Zur Klinik der Narkolepsie. They also used large amounts of snitchers before ww1. There are several cases of possible murders before ww1, the most obvious being the famous Rudolf Diesel, see chapter murder on my homepage.You may have translated the texts by clicking the flags.
wwwtotalitaerde 8 months ago
@BirrelSquoy 3.) Retards who don't understand jokes and scream "This video is a joke you retard!" to a person who actually understands that this is a joke and is joking about it.
TheFinlandnator 8 months ago
This video is only made funnier by:
1.) The egocentric twelve-year-olds that lurk YouTube, looking to start shit on ANYTHING they dislike or disagree with, and
2.) The equally immature speds who actually think The Onion is legit!
Keep up the good work, guys, and we'll see you in Hell!
:D
BirrelSquoy 8 months ago
@BirrelSquoy Too much effort . . .
2012singularity2012 7 months ago
@2012singularity2012
On my part, or theirs?
BirrelSquoy 7 months ago
The sad thing is, I can actually see someone doing this in real life.
NeonF1sh1 8 months ago
@NeonF1sh1 Agreed. Kinda wierd that people might actually think this is a good idea
MrGameandSub 8 months ago
115 people are being watched by the government
hamiltonjsh 8 months ago
Good one! LOL!!
Lulu4Him 8 months ago
BAH HA HA HA HA!!!
MellBuzzy 8 months ago
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH O.O please please please kill this video!! o.o omg ahhhh ......... whyyyyyyyyyyyyy?! freak the crap outta me! why did i even watch thisss?? now im even more freakeddd
lovedd1213 8 months ago
I KNEW IT.
rabbitwho 8 months ago
the people on this show are really stupid and ignorant and it really shows
1787dude 8 months ago
I find this disturbing. Imagine if you were schizophrenic and watched this. I'd probably kill myself.
DEIMOSLOL 8 months ago
@DEIMOSLOL
I have schizoaffective disorder and I found this video hilarious...
Kfowlkes09 8 months ago