Dirty Potter 4 - "Fuckbeak & Friends," Chapter 1

[TheRand0musername]

L0L!!

[dirtypottertube]

@TheRand0musername now i guess you see why i am so pro obscenity

[torque34]

lol, "he went on the internet to watch sick shit and jerk off."

I fucking lost it.

[CookiesOnFridays]

is there an mp3 for this? If so can you send me a link please?

[Quitu1849]

What happened to Tit Thomas? Is he still at Hogwarts?

[shimsham35]

in tears at 0:07

[CaveofTwoLovers]

Where is Dirty Potter 1?

[RGDcommentnode]

@CaveofTwoLovers It's on another channel, dirtypotterfan, I think.

[EtherDimentionalist]

@CaveofTwoLovers or you could check their official website... dirtypotter dot cummmmm!

[captainbloodloss1]

@CaveofTwoLovers i think its called "dirty pottter and the snape kills dumbledore"

[jarpasmannen]

"..in a freak tripple-penetration accident"

[TheHandsomeCrab]

This video is so disgusting I wish SOPA had passed.

[Tomservo3Alt]

Gee, Fuckbeak really reminds me of Chris-Chan.

[Neverwishy]

stop playing video games you monster, your fans are in need of dirty potter jerk material

[MSHaloFour]

Merry Christmas! Time for Jesus to get his BIG BIRTHDAY BONUS.

[LordAtmo64]

cant wait....next chapter....gonna be a gut buster. How ever shall Fuckbeak continue his day? XD

[ijustreview]

HEY! There was no racism in this whatsoever! I feel cheated

[LynxenX]

AND IT SOUNDED LIKE: "Fffflpoopleflrlrlplrpfffffff-­ffff-ffffeerrrtttttferrttt"

[JakeSpringhorn]

"Let's get Hermione and bang the cunt full of hair."

"Noooo!!" said Ron. "We'll die! Her crabs will eat us."

Best part.

[BandicootSugar45]

This is amazing, thanks for killing my stomach by making me laugh so hard.

[CalamityAce]

Fuckbeak and Friends Part 2 would be a fantastic Christmas present!

[E100ZERO]

hey retarded nigger with nigger aids release the fuck second chapter

[KaraMayonakaSora]

That awkward feel when your mom walks in during the middle of the video and your mouse is a piece of shit that registers two clicks instead of one so you have to click it like thirty times to stop the video.

[Neverwishy]

ron's vomiting bird noise is the best sound effect, it is almost as good as poik

[WLDFLD]

"jerkily" -- best word in the video

[d00mfan89]

Thumbs up if you hear the reference to "Perfect Hair Forever"

[dirtypottertube]

@d00mfan89 :D You're the only one I think

[LordAtmo64]

@d00mfan89 I love that show..But I can't find the reference anywhere....

[d00mfan89]

@LordAtmo64 Re-watch the episode "woke up drunk" and you shall find your answer

[LordAtmo64]

@d00mfan89 lk;jdlkasjdlk OMG THE FUNNIEST PART TOO! How the hell did I miss THAT?! XD

[utewbcuntasstrophe]

take your time on the fucking third half man, take your time

[b0mbcityrocker]

i drank a good amount of beer last night, for the description of how my shit sounded this morning, go to 1:58

[sh4rky70]

Big bearded gay jewish burly sailor pajama party pornography is my favorite pornography.

[Tirgo69]

>GO FUCK YOURSELF

>I THINK I WILL THEN

[vash47]

WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO TODAY THEN?!

[The2cyn]

@vash47 WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO TODAY? WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO TODAY?

[vash47]

@The2cyn SHUT UP

[LordAtmo64]

@vash47 but Ron did not seem to have heard....

[BlueKewne]

Thank you for uploading it on your website in Quicktime format. My friend who's currently deployed in Afghanistan couldn't view the YouTube version as their satellite internet is too slow for YouTube, but he was able to listen to the QuickTime MP3 today.

He's a big fan of Dirty Potter and really appreciates your latest work.

[Neverwishy]

Knowing these chaptered releases, they'll only get better and better and culminate in something so amazing it'll destroy our collective minds.

[djburst]

Every fucking time I hear "the goooogles", I lose it.

[SailorMars768]

WE'LL DIE. HER CRABS WILL EAT US.

[Xzina92x]

LMAO woke up with a plan fully formed and ripped a noisy fart

[xhugh475869x]

nooo her crabs will eat us XD

[StupidHead1010]

Looks like F*ckbeak disliked due to lag.

His internet's made of wood, you know.

[QuintusCunctator]

I'm amazed nobody has yet commented or asked an explanation about Ron's feat - guys, he managed to fuck himself. Properly, it seems.

[yoshu2]

Is FuckBeak the reason why everyone in hogwarts is a sexual deviant?

[PikaMario]

I would take a bullet for you, DirtyPotterTube

[LongHairedLoser]

And he'd take one up for you...

...up the arse.

[KarinMikazuki]

go to google images and search for "big bearded gay jewish burly sailor pajama party"

Look at the first picture.

[ebonifragaria]

@KarinMikazuki I added "porn" to the end and got Billy Mays :O

[SoldierX47]

Somebody should send this video to Jim Dale.

[LineDancer97]

I'm really thirsty, but I can't watch the damn video without spitting my water out!

[DesertTornado]

VIOLENT cunnilingus

[DirtySplicingInc]

I can't believe, with all that the Transcribe Audio misunderstands, that it actually recognized "spectacularly on bloody fucking everything."

[mousaey]

@DirtySplicingInc Lava crude toilet's puma

[thisisshitluigi]

gotta love the baccano bgm at 5:00

[Sallinstrom]

What is the song that begins at 6:30 ? I swear I recognize it from somewhere...

[dirtypottertube]

@Sallinstrom Grande valse brillante by Chopin. Because here at Dirty Potter, we're fucking classy like that.

[MistaDeoxys]

"WHATAREWEGONNADOTODAYTHEN" asked Isaac and Miria.

[SimonAllanSAS]

Theres nothing quite as arousing as big bearded gay jewish burly sailor pajama party porn.

[SimonAllanSAS]

Imagine Jim Dale reading this out to a classroom of children....

[TriggerheartExcelica]

If Jim Dale isn't allowed to say what really happened to Fuckbeak, what about the explanation he gave about him raping everyone at Hogwarts into homosexuality? Is that a cover story as well?

[TheImaCowMoo]

Amazing!

[Tomservo3Alt]

Finally, it's out!

VIOLENT CUNNILINGUS!

[burningsigil]

new DP?

finally, i can begin jacking it furiously once again

[dirtypottertube]

@burningsigil more to cum soon too!!

cuuumm!!!!!

[LassesIndex]

@dirtypottertube

Stop keeping it for so long! I understand if you're trying to make a schedule, but please make that weekly or monthly instead of every-half-yearly. :| Unless of course it took you this long to make chapter one.

[Oliver3168Large]

@burningsigil and i can fap to your fapping

[afilthyleaver]

this was an inspiration

[RGDcommentnode]

Now I know why Dumbledore is gay...

[thematrix666]

this is amazing XDDD i shared everywhere i can ! this is just too amazing XD

[AusKNightmare]

where do i get a prior written authorisation from jim dales grandfathers carcass?

[dirtypottertube]

1. i am not sure, probably from jim dale hismelf 2. it's supposed to be his cock (my grandfather's CAWCK)

[AusKNightmare]

@dirtypottertube ah, i see. i thought that bitch wich is youtube cut of a tiny bit of the end

[Hiccupone]

Can't wait for the next issue, i know it's going to be just as delightfully and disgustingly as erotic as this one!

[PremierMilenkov]

Why, I must say, Dirty Potter has lost none of its charm to time.

If anything, it has returned quite improved, if I do say so myself.

[dirtypottertube]

@PremierMilenkov the thing i'm most excited about is that this chapter is nothing compared to what we have in store

[PremierMilenkov]

@dirtypottertube My trousers are tightening with anticipation...

[MaxInterjects]

@dirtypottertube gahh i cant wait. When's the next one coming?

[dirtypottertube]

@MaxInterjects idk when i feel like finishing it pretty much

[MaxInterjects]

@dirtypottertube Cool beans

[TeachAManToPhish]

I hope part poo, I mean 2, wont be too long.

[TeachAManToPhish]

It is sooo fun to mic spam this on tf2. Although most people mute me, the ones that listen laugh their heads off.

[CeruleanFilms]

Welcome back, you magnificent bastard...

As usual, I laughed to the point of almost being sick. These will never get old. I have to know, how did you get him to say "clitoris"?

[Austinflank]

The last 10 seconds was the best.

[TwistedMetalvids]

I lost it went Jim Dale said

"Then he went on the internet to watch sick shit, and jek off."

3:02

[arkkisarkki]

You should totally do a Jim Dale a cappella version of Tubular Bells.

[BowserTheSecond]

I would really like to know what the music at 0:30 - 0:47 is from, or else I'll go "squish-squish-squishy-squashy­-squish-oikoikoik" all over your living room floor.

[dirtypottertube]

@BowserTheSecond Eternal Sonata OST - The Mediocrity Sought Out By Everyone

GREAT rpg with an amazing soundtrack

fuckbeak's "theme" is also from that game in this chapter

[usahp]

There wasn't any excessive racism :<

[dirtypottertube]

@usahp the disclaimer covers the audiobook SERIES

so wait for the next chapter

[frostyham]

So in the potterverse, is there a company called "Bad Hipogriff" that sells hipogriff dildos, and do they sell dragon dildos too or is that still the other company? Would that mean that they compete in the sale of dildos?

[CalamityAce]

WHATAREWEGONNADOTODAYTHEN?!

WHATAREWEGONNADOTODAYTHEN?!

WHATAREWEGONNADOTODAYTHEN?!

SHUT UP!

[FeygeleGoy]

...And your skill becomes all the more impressive with each release. It's turned from silly repetitions of "Ron ejaculated" to full-out plays that can't legally be performed on any stage.

If it seriously takes a year between DP releases, the torture of waiting is far surpassed by the perverse, insane joy I get from these.

In short, keep these reckless, but potentially wonderful ideas coming!

[Schlockenspiel]

@FeygeleGoy Don't you go calling the early episodes "silly" you snot-mouthed punk!

Dirty Potter 1 is still GOD. "Oh he's the world's biggest faggot said snape"

[TheStrongBadMan]

@FeygeleGoy Virty Potter is the longest Aristocrats joke ever.

[FeygeleGoy]

3:13 Damn, I can't tell you how often I was in this *same exact* situation as Fuckbeak.

...Well, aside from the "pajama party" part.

[dirtypottertube]

@FeygeleGoy it was intended to be a shout out to you dude

hahaha

[FeygeleGoy]

@dirtypottertube I thought so!!! I just couldn't believe it! Thanks, I'm honored! :-D

[RectalRapist]

Looks like Jim Dale found this video judging by the one dislike

[TriggerheartExcelica]

You know, I used to hate the word "googles" until I saw this video. I guess everyone was just pronouncing it wrong all this time.

[R1robot]

Hard mode: whats this song is called on 8:10?

[dirtypottertube]

@R1robot ooh ooh me me i know it

[CeruleanFilms]

@R1robot That's the final moments from the soundtrack to "Inception"

[molemanninethousand]

Oh dear. I'm just starting to dive into this, been waiting a LONG time......

[Schlockenspiel]

that was really funny the way that music climaxed in time with ron's orgasm LOLOLO

[Schlockenspiel]

also I forgot to mention it's funny as fuck

[Schlockenspiel]

yo DP you've conquered new plains of creativity which results in a freshness that conventional wisdom would have deemed unlikely considering the age of the series, dawg.

[Dawngaward0110]

WHUTAREWEGONNADOTODAYTHEN? WHUTAREWEGONNADOTODAYTHEN? WHUTAREWEGONNADOTODAYTHEN? WHUTAREWEGONNA-SHUT UP.

[WLDFLD]

the best word in this video is at 6:18

[DirtySplicingInc]

@WLDFLD

When I first heard it, I had to do a double-take.

[TriggerheartExcelica]

@WLDFLD I first listened to this in my car and nearly crashed when I heard it.

[stupiditylord77]

excuse me, but could someone tell me what the music is at 4:10? I remember that it was from neon genesis evangelion, but that's all i remember about that song.

[dirtypottertube]

@stupiditylord77 Thanatos from OST 2

[pageygeeza]

*crying with laughter*

[mousaey]

So funny, I nearly choked on my moldy pineapple.

[TheHPArsenal]

@mousaey Did you let it rot to give it extra flavor?

[althegamefreak]

lol ha ha this is great. :) glad its here

[Colethecon]

THE NOISES HAVE ENTERED MY DNA!!!

[xxxx59xxxx]

I laughed. I cried. I came. I learned jim dale is a gigantic man that prefers to write on the ocean.

[JIMKUltra]

It's soooooooo good to hear new JIm Dale. Thank you ever so mch

[Streetmastaalex]

Oh god this is amazing, dude this must have taken so much effort and time, it srsly deserves 100000000000000000000000000 views

[ChmidthBG]

OH GOD YES

[Invisiblepainting]

"I've just been coming on my dead mum, and I'm off to do a bit more" - Best line.

[ineedmorenaruto]

@Invisiblepainting i love how stern he sounds while saying it lol

[TheSolidJake]

Live Long and Prosper DirtyPotter Tube

[utewbcuntasstrophe]

GRAAAAAAAAAAANDE!!!!

[gamergator]

I have been waiting for this moment for so long... Long live dirty potter!

[TriggerheartExcelica]

I'm not familiar with Harry Potter. Is Fuckbeak based on an actual character from it or is it just a name you thought was funny?

[TheDevilbuster]

@TriggerheartExcelica He got it from "Buckbeak", some hippogriff from...Book 3, I believe. He changed the "B" to "F". Presto, our latest protagonist (and who might very well be Jim Dale in disguise).

[superpheonixfire]

@TheDevilbuster I think so too! It just seems so evident that it is him...

[molemanninethousand]

@TriggerheartExcelica "Buckbeak" is the name of a hippogriff character.

[GracefulAssassin9]

"Whatever, faggots," said Hermione knowledgeably.

[DjGeraldo0023]

Welcome Back!!!!

[Rogultgot]

Fuck yesssssss

[Megalesios]

Ritardando will never be the same again

[dirtypottertube]

@Megalesios :D

[Akriloth2160]

My patience has been rewarded! Thank you so much, Dirty Potter!

[MRKnowitallaboutRFOM]

I was in tears at the warning

[crudnsludge]

Eating lunch quite happily whilst listening to this, Jim Dale has made me completely indifferent to Hermione's Fishy beef curtains.

[ut2k4wikichici]

Can we get a download link for the mp3?

[vickiii35]

SKEEETY SKEET.

[Mannike54]

I just fucking skeeted everywhere.

[carltheshivan]

I think I understand why it took so long for Dirtypotteroffical to get this to us. He actually finished it long ago but it took forever to upload because at his house the internet is made of wood.

[JIMKUltra]

AT LAST! Lovin' it

[ineedmorenaruto]

quick question... why is there a giant jim dale in the ocean?

[IMMAOILMAN]

The tragic portrait of a depraved soul looking only for refuge from life's hardships in its simple pleasures.

[BlueKewne]

god damnit, thanks to Jim Dale's dirty mind I can't unsee the massive boner coming out of the ampersand (the '&' symbol) in the video's title.

[kilderok]

THANK YOU for this.

[davidtregenza]

100th like

[theitmoo2]

The king of sentence mixing indeed

[MewShaVinBasUra]

There needs to be a dub of the Garfield & Friends intro song with Jim Dale singing the lyrics, only replace all instances with Garfield with Fuckbeak.

[DarthRatbat]

So, since Ron makes an appearance here, is this chronologically before Dirty Potter 3, or did Ron simply re-materialize in the Harry Potter universe when Jim Dale banned him in Dirty the Pooh 3?

[dirtypottertube]

canonically, yes, this takes place before dirty potter 3.

[SuperSaiyanAl]

@dirtypottertube When the world suddenly exploded at the end of Dirty the Pooh 3, did that mark the final end for the Dirty Saga? Or did the Hundred Acre Wood exist in a world separate from the world containing Hogwarts and its crew? Will Pooh attempt a second Stinkpocolypse at Hogwarts in the future?

Perhaps I shouldn't be analyzing Dirty Audio so closely, but dammit, I want to know these things!

[dirtypottertube]

@SuperSaiyanAl no, they exist in completely different dimensions

[AusKNightmare]

this was totaly worth the wait. ill have some pineapple for the celebration and then jerk off untill my dick is on fire, while watching prolapse porn.

[carltheshivan]

Missing most of the toilet on purpose! We love you DP.

[gmmg93]

I let it rot to give it a stronger flavor

[RGDcommentnode]

Hermione's vagina resembled an Arby's roast beef sandwich.

With a lot of ketchup.

[NinjaKow0]

Oh my Jim Dale, it's actually arrived...

[Lerborn]

Brilliant story telling in this one and as funny as always. I will now sleep well tonight

[Kulsprutejojjo]

Fuckbeak is my new idol

[officialunofficial]

Beautiful. 

[KagariAsuha]

The very first words out of my mouth after seeing this in my subscription box were, "It's like motherfuckin' Christmas up in this bitch." I then proceeded to crack open a celebratory can of pineapple rings -- this is the kind of shit you just gotta have a snack with.

[Azukido]

"Neither this recording nor any other portion of it, may be reproduced or used for any purpose, without prior written authorization from my grandfather's COCK."